 All right, the sunshine fee, right? Question. If a man says he doesn't wanna get married anymore and it's your wish to get married in the future, should one cut off the relationship? If a man says he doesn't wanna get married. Okay, so this is a great question and this is really important for those of us in midlife. Okay, so let me just say why that is. So the thing is most folks in midlife, which I say midlife is after baby making years and before retirement, roughly 75% of singles who are actively looking for love in this age demographic are divorced. And a lot of people right after divorce are very reluctant to ever wanna get married again. I'm gonna repeat that. People that have just come off of divorce are very reluctant to get married again. I know after my divorce, it was a good five, six, seven. I said, I never wanna get married again. I never wanna get married again. I never wanna get married again. And now it's funny because now I so wanna get married but it's been 15 years since the ending of my relationship. So one is oftentimes people that don't wanna get married it's because they had a really bad experience in their marriage. Now that doesn't mean that they may not change their mind at some point. But I think ultimately what you might want to find out is why they don't want it to get remarried. Why don't they wanna get remarried? Because if someone is really reeling from pain in their past marriage, it's understandable. I was reeling with a lot of pain from my marriage, the divorce in and of itself because I want you to think about it. Divorce is an unraveling of the tapestry of an old life and then you have to learn to create a new tapestry on your own. And a lot of people just go right back together with someone else. We human beings are rather co-dependent. In fact, if you're not familiar with the book co-dependent no more, people oftentimes gravitate to new relationships very quickly without healing from their past relationships. That doesn't mean that they wanna get married. I'll show the book one more time, co-dependent no more. Doesn't mean that they may just because someone wants to get into a relationship right away doesn't mean they wanna get married. So going back to the original question. First off, you wanna get a sense of how far have they healed from their past relationship and what's causing them to be reluctant. I know my friend says, one of my dear friends says, what's the point of getting married if I'm not gonna share assets with someone? And that's a really good point. Ultimately marriage is going to be about a commingling of assets. This is why I said to you earlier, I'm looking for myself, I'm looking to either get remarried or live with someone at some point because I don't wanna have a relationship where we're living in two separate houses. Now some people can do that. Some people can live in separate homes and carry on for years in a relationship. Now, as I just said that some of you might be thinking long distance. Let me just be clear about something. It's fun to do long distance when you're young and you have the energy but I just want you to think 10, 15 years in the future. Do you wanna be constantly getting on a plane to see each other? At some point, if you're not either moving towards getting either in the same home or at least live close to one another, relationships are very problematic because how can you be there for a person during the tough times? For example, later today, I'm a dear friend of mine. She needs a ride home from the hospital and her boyfriend can't make it. Now I happen to be a dear friend, okay? And she's blessed to have that but her boyfriend does it nine out of 10 times and I just happen to be there. That's what proximity can do for you which is very difficult to do when you have distance involved but that's a whole nother conversation. I'm going off on a tangent. Anyway, go back to your original question. What was the question centered around marriage? Listen, you've gotta decide for yourself. Just because someone says they don't wanna get married, I at least ask a few more questions to determine if you're on the same page or not and if you are, you may wanna explore it and if you're not, you may wanna move on. Great question sunshine, thank you so much.