 What a marvelous age we live in. Good girls don't care about sex. Good, decent, wholesome girls do not read about sex. Goodness, why would we? Everybody knows that men have sex because they love it and women women have sex because they want love and men do not love those women. The freaks. These women cannot be trusted and are certainly not marriage material. Honey, here is a little tip. You're supposed to kiss one frog to turn him into a prince. You don't go sleeping around with the entire pond. Unless you want warts, that is. And that is what I and the rest of the world see whenever a woman walks around with some how-to-slut-you-all in one of those awful Cosmo magazines. We see warts, oozing warts. Self-respecting women learn about sex from a man. A man will show you what feels good for you based on what other women in the past have liked. Yes, sure, I've heard that 90% of women have faked orgasms, so what? Uh-huh, I know that the penis-driven, Freudian concept of what sex is is why two-thirds of women don't achieve regular orgasm. Ah, yes, I do understand that quality sex education on pleasure and anatomy could be crucial as today's youth come of age in a porn-saturated society, but come on! I'm talking about reading sex books. It's gross, like what's next? Pleasuring yourself? People, let's be civil for a second. I have not had an orgasm in over 22 years, and I am just bi- I am absolutely god. Will someone just play that stupid jingle? Cosmo's dirty books, my oh my. I'd rather be pure for the perfect guy. Wait, who are we kidding? That makes no sense. Smart girls, read about sex.