PLEASE READ BEFORE WATCHING!
This song has taken me over a year to write and put together. It is very rare that I talk about my brother because I rarely see him let alone talk to him. Growing up, he was definitely my biggest role model. I truly looked up to him and how cool I thought he was. He showed me how to wrestle, helped me with football, introduced me to 90's rap, and everything else an older brother would do. But as I got older, he started disappearing for days and even weeks on end. Everything from running away to stealing from local stores, Jake slowly started getting into more and more trouble. Fast forward a few years and he found himself in Jail when he was almost 20. As time went on he started missing birthdays, holidays, family dinners, little league games, etc. That's when I realized how much he was really gone. For about 12 years now he's been in and out of prison. I haven't seen him in over a year now, and talk to him every couple months on the phone for a minute or two. I've seen how emotionally spent my whole family has become with trying to help him over the years, and it deeply saddens me. I think I've grown accustomed to not having him there to hang out with or talk to. The real turning point for me though was my 21st birthday last year. He was finally out of jail and I was so excited to hear he was coming to my birthday dinner. Everyone was there but as more and more time passed, I kept looking at the door waiting for him to walk through. He never did. To be honest it broke my heart. Shortly after, he went back to jail. Since then, I have spoke with him once on the phone. My aim with this song is not to embarrass nor put down my brother in any way. Music is simply the best way for me express myself.
I'm in tears while writing this. I can't tell you how much I miss and love my older brother. I constantly pray for his well being and that someday he will change. I also strongly believe that God will guide him towards happiness, but he needs to make the right decisions first.
Please, enjoy this song that I have spent lots of time and energy creating. Music is a beautiful thing.
Shot & edited by the very talented Kyler Sciarrone
Re-prod by Erik Giovani