MC Friar Tuck drops by Charlie Sloth's 1Xtra studios to drop some BARS FROM HEAVEN.
Chris Turner - Lyrics and Performance
Dru Wakely - Music, Recording, Camera and Editing
Yeah, yeah, yeah…this is Friar in the Booth. Rhymes so hot you need a friar extinguisher! Fighting friar with friar! Out of the frying pan into the friar! It's a baptism of friar! Yes - this will be mainly friar puns!
Friar in the hole…y house of the Lord//I’m a mendicant meanderer and heaven’s my reward
Not an old bald man gone n’ grown mature//shorn a keratin rim that i call my tonsure!
Order Dominican but not from the Republic//got a big belly and you know I like to rub it
Dominic, he the patron saint of astronomers//pretty fittin’ cuz you be looking at a star!
Uptown monk, downtown abbey//My other clothes are robes and they lookin’ pretty shabby
Don’t smother monks in satin when the laypeople suffer//if you know your latin you can call me a brother
I’m clever, girl - jurassic park classic in a cassock//put you in a casket have your pastor kneeling praying on a hassock
Your life: pathetic - my lifestyle ascetic//you been prayin’ for your paradise, i just go and get it
Sounds silly but this is friar in the booth//if i wasn’t celibate i’d be sirin’ the youth
It’s absurd all these urges but i never tell the abbot//I heard they all virgins but i get em out of the habit
In summary get me to a nunnery, alleviate the drudgery and rummage in their shrubbery
Mother superior, my motives ulterior//num num on a plump nun with another superb rear!
So let me see you lose your head like you be John the Baptist//Bishops got a lotta hi hats, s’why I call ‘em trappists.
Unless the brothers taken yet another vow of silence//make some Friar-Tucking noise for St Thomas Acquinas!
Henry VIII - suck my Saint Benedict…