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  • White Michael Jordan

    484 views 5 years ago
    White Michael Jordan (played by me, Joey Arnold) decided to join the Hockey league, according to this Five O'Clock News Special, on channel 39. The News Anchor, Bill Montgomery (played by my brother, Rick Arnold), reports this story from the news studio. Watch the news live as White Michael Jordan announces his retirement from NBA basketball, because "I'm bore of basketball and decide to join the hockey league. Well, I hope I get the team. Wait, what am I talking about? I'm Michael Jordan, I can do anything. Flying through the sky." After that, Jordan coughs. Back in the news room, anchorman Bill Montgomery scorns,

    The news originally starts behind the scenes, with Arnold chirping, "Did you press the green button?" I reply with, "Yeah." Arnold returns, "Ok."

    Montgomery opens, "Hello, my name is Bill Montgomery, and this is channel 39 news. Today's top story is, Michael Jordan has decided to quit basketball and try out for the hockey league. This is what he had to say in a press conference yesterday." After that, Montgomery begins coughing while mouthing to the camera man (me) to turn off the camera and to switch to the footage of the White Michael Jordan. Montgomery literally mouths the words, "Turn it off."

    It cuts to White Michael Jordan saying the following, "Bored of basketball. So, I try out the hockey team. [PAUSE. SMILE. HESITATION. BEGIN TO WALK AROUND]. Well, I hope I get the, I hope I get the team. What am I saying? I'm Michael Jordan, I can do anything; flying through the high."

    After that, the white younger sister of Michael Jordan walks by smiling with a glitch of dancing. She walks right through that ghetto trailer kitchen that was also the news conference room for professional NBA athletes for short white basketball athletes like White Michael Jordan himself. Jordan coughs as it cuts back to Montgomery.

    Montgomery concludes, "Well, I don't know about Michael Jordan playing (basketball) hockey. He can probably do it if he says so. [PSSS] Not, he can't do anything. He's an idiot. He's so stupid. He thinks he's God. [PAUSE]. Wait, maybe he is?" I follow this with the scary background music "Da da daaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!" Show less
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