Girlfriends... they can actually be pretty awesome, just like boyfriends... but as seen in many internet girlfriend memes, there are downsides. Now not all these things apply to all women... duh, but you know... some people will find this to be painfully relevant.
Thank you to Madison DeCambrafor being in this video :)
The Original Script:
10 Things I Hate About Girlfriends
1. They never offer to pay for anything.
Greg: So I’ll order the pizza?
Greg: …with my money?
Greg: Even though we both have jobs?
2. They never tell you what they want, but will complain when it’s too late.
Girlfriend: You haven’t gone down on me in weeks.
Greg: Did… you ever ask me to?
Greg: So… like I can’t build a time machine.
Girlfriend: Well I’m pis*** now!
Greg: THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID SOMETHING!
Girlfriend: YOU SHOULD HAVE READ MY MIND!!!
Greg: *** ***** IT WOMAN!
3. An lot of girlfriends are shy… god that’s annoying.
Greg: Can you call the utility company about our bill?
Girlfriend: No, I’m scared.
Greg: Scared of what?
Girlfriend: I’m scared to talk to them.
Girlfriend: Because I’m ****ing stupid.
Greg: I agree wholeheartedly.
4. They’ll get jealous when it makes no sense.
Girlfriend: It’s ok if you look at ****, I don’t mind.
Greg: Ok… well I do.
Girlfriend: YOU LOOK AT ****!?
Greg: Yes… sometimes.
Girlfriend: OH MY GOD!! THOSE PICTURES ARE GOING TO STEAL YOU AWAY FROM ME!
Girlfriend: They’re going to come out of the computer screen like the movie the ring and **** you because that is the only way me getting upset over this makes sense!
Greg: WHAT!? MY COMPUTER WILL HAVE *** WITH ME? AWESOME!
5. They act like you’re horrible for being a man.
Girlfriend: Do you ever think about other women?
Greg: Yes, like… all the time.
Greg: I have millions of ***** inside me screaming to get out… you can only get pregnant once every nine months, while I can impregnate every damn day!
Girlfriend: What does that have to do with anything!?
Greg: I’m a BANG machine! I’m designed to mindlessly reproduce till I die!
Girlfriend: So you’re just going to go bang women now?
Greg: No… I’m going to be loyal, despite my natural urgent to bang numerous women, I’m just saying I’m allowed to think about it… is that ok?
Greg: IF YOU’RE GOING TO BE MAD EITHER WAY THAN I MAY AS WELL SLEEP AROUND!
Girlfriend: I WANT TO DIE!!!!
Greg: You should have been a ******!
6. They get mad when you hit them.
*guy punches girl*
6. Just kidding, don’t hit women, it’s bad… unless they’re bigger than you.
6. Anyway, girlfriends are also almost always too emotional.
Girlfriend: Your video games suck & your anime sucks too.
Greg: Ok, now you’re being a *****.
Girlfriend: Did you just call me a *****?
Girlfriend: Oh my god… you… called me… a b*****.
Greg: Yeah, so just call me a d*** or do****** and we’ll be even.
Girlfriend: No… instead of me throwing out back I’m just going to be a viiiictummm. *cries*
Greg: Well there goes any chance at happiness today.
Girlfriend: *crying hysterically*
7. They almost all insanely insecure about their bodies.
Girlfriend: Do I look good *****?
Guy: Yeah… you look great.
Girlfriend: But not AMAZING? Just GREAT?
Guy: …ok, you look amazing.
Girlfriend: NO! You said “GREAT” it’s too late! I’m sorry I’m not PERFECT!
Guy: Are you about to cry again.
Girlfriend: *starts to tear up*
Guy: In 3… 2… 1….
Guy: Je** *****
8. They act like they get over things but they NEVER get over things.
Girlfriend: Hey honey!
Girlfriend: What did you do today?
Guy: Just, hung around the house.
Girlfriend: M***** TO P***** WHILE COMPARING OTHER WOMEN’S BODIES TO MY HORRIBLE ONE! AHHHHH!!! *runs off*
Guy: *puts **** in his mouth*
*RAN OUT OF SPACE*
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