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Chad Wild Clay

Asian Massage - Macklemore THRIFT SHOP Parody

305,613 views 9 months ago
This thrift shop parody is based on true events.
GET THIS SONG ON iTUNES: http://bit.ly/ThriftShopMP3
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Watch the Original video - http://www.youtube.com/watc...

All music performed, recorded and produced by Chad Wild Clay (B.B. Bling). No copyrighted material was used. This version is all newly created music, lyrics and video.

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LYRICS
[Verse 1:]
Nah, Walk up to the spa like, "What up, this is a garage!"
ahh it's a dump I walked inside was a mirage
nice looking digs and so I say Chao
the girl is like, Damn, that's a big long honkey
Robe in' in, helping me, think this girl is seventeen,
Dressed in all black, 'cept my flippy floppies, those are green
what is she saying to me? Girl's speaking vietnamese
Buddy said to watch this, girls from behind those sheets
(Niceeeeeeeeee)
Renig, meant my muslces ARE tense!

Watchin em walking in, 'bout to go and give some compliments
That's when I am recognicent, none of em even talk English
But all my buddies talk Viet
they are hunting and chattin' and
Spendin' their money and they headin in back when I felt a pinch

Turned and saw a grandma smile, and she tugged my hand a while,
No for real - this your grandma? - is she gonna rub me down? (Thank you!)
smelled of Pho soup and some malt liquor
looked around, was no exit, so I tried to trick her
"I have an open knee sore, I gotta go to the morgue"
She got a deep blank look, then I sought out the Lord
"Hello, hello, my grace man, my fellow
my brain ain't got no thoughts of the profane, hell no
Please don't let this old thing tickle me like elmo"
And then I heard in, God's voice: "You're at a bordello"

[Hook 1]
My buddies got some babes
but I got a twenty thousand year old grandma
I'm getting massaged, trying to be mellow
What is a bordello?


[Verse 2:]
What you know about elderly folk on you jogging?
What you knowin' about crushin' your voice box in?
I'm choking, I'm choking, your perched on my esophagus
One man's neck is another gram's footrest
Thank you Grandma for inflaming my bad back man that hurt
'Cause right now I feel a concussion
And then she whispered in my ear but I smelled "onions"
It must a been ninety years since at the dentist..."onions"
this grandma is handy, with drama she grabbed me
she flipped me over so uncanny that I had to cuss out like a trucker
I felt my undies getting tugged and it made me wonder
does she like farming? cause she just tried to milk my utter
I jumped up "Whoa", then Granny asks "You No Like?"
I'm like "Yo - you're not a cougar, more a T-Rex
It is intuition, a tent I will not be pitching
Granny's feelings must a been hurt, she was crying and a sniffling
I felt bad, granny's probably always dissed like this
I felt bad, no one ever wants her business
Where's your nursing home?
I'll visit, we'll have fun, make some music, upload to YouTube what we wrote
You can play any instrument you like, that's my oath
That's when I heard grandma say, "I play your rusty trombone"

[Hook 2]
My buddies got some babes
but they were undercover call girl coppers
they all got arrested, I almost got molested
This massage was awful Show less
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