http://www.calpernia.com/music
http://www.transproofed.com
Calpernia performs at a fundraiser for a local adopted kindergarten class as celebrity guest of the CSULB chapter of Delta Lambda Phi. No, the kindergarteners weren't in the audience during my racy numbers, ha ha. Thank you for the video and the fun evening, Delta Lambda Phi brothers!
Delta Lambda Phi: http://www.dlp.org

_2QoHK63HHA

http://www.calpernia.com
Cal-pal Adam mud-wrestles at Miss Kitty's and dislocates his shoulder. =(

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http://www.calpernia.com/itune s
http://www.transproofed.com
http://www.calpernia.com
From the Deep Stealth short comedy "Transproofed", Matthew McPeck's remix of "Next!"
I'm the next leading lady, of the silver screen,
Do you think that you can play, the man of my dreams,
So submit your application and I'll take a look,
If your audition goes well, we may go off book,

The casting couch is quite comfy, If ya know what I mean,
I'm lookin for a man that can handle my scene
Take your shirt off, learn your lines, lemme see what ya got,
I can make you a star if you can make me hot!


NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

Do you want the part or dont'cha, I don't have all day,
Ev'rything depends on me, and I'll have my way,
Your love scene better be realistic, or we'll do it again,
If you want this award, you best be in it to win,

You may have to get naked, trust me it's for the art,
you know there's twenty guys behind you and they all want this part,
Go ahead and get dressed, yeah I love what you do,
Don't call us, We'll call you.


NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

You may have to get naked, trust me it's for the art,
you know there's twenty guys behind you and they all want this part,
Yeah this role could make or break you, hope you're up to the task,
If you need some private coaching, boy, you just hafta ask,
Hope you're open to suggest, cause I've got some ideas,
If you have any questions, baby, I'm all ears,
Go ahead and get dressed, yeah I love what you do,
Don't call us, We'll call you.

NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

p6xfgtVLLn4

http://www.calpernia.com/itune s
http://www.transproofed.com
http://www.calpernia.com
From the Deep Stealth short comedy "Transproofed", Matthew McPeck's remix of "Next!"
I'm the next leading lady, of the silver screen,
Do you think that you can play, the man of my dreams,
So submit your application and I'll take a look,
If your audition goes well, we may go off book,

The casting couch is quite comfy, If ya know what I mean,
I'm lookin for a man that can handle my scene
Take your shirt off, learn your lines, lemme see what ya got,
I can make you a star if you can make me hot!


NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

Do you want the part or dont'cha, I don't have all day,
Ev'rything depends on me, and I'll have my way,
Your love scene better be realistic, or we'll do it again,
If you want this award, you best be in it to win,

You may have to get naked, trust me it's for the art,
you know there's twenty guys behind you and they all want this part,
Go ahead and get dressed, yeah I love what you do,
Don't call us, We'll call you.


NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

You may have to get naked, trust me it's for the art,
you know there's twenty guys behind you and they all want this part,
Yeah this role could make or break you, hope you're up to the task,
If you need some private coaching, boy, you just hafta ask,
Hope you're open to suggest, cause I've got some ideas,
If you have any questions, baby, I'm all ears,
Go ahead and get dressed, yeah I love what you do,
Don't call us, We'll call you.

NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

p6xfgtVLLn4

Get it for 99¢:
http://www.calpernia.com/music
http://www.andreajames.com
http://www.genderlife.com
http://www.transproofed.com
Music by Calpernia Addams
Directed by Andrea James
Lyrics:
They call me Miss Dis, because I put em all down
I'm the dissin'-ist bitch, you better ask around
So set your damn watch to Eleven Fifty Nine
And enjoy your last minute, cause bitch you're mine.

I'monna cut you up like you wouldn't believe
monna crisp you up crunichier than Paris's weave
I'm gonna lay in a burn, atcha can't dismiss
If you wanna enemy, you don't wanna Miss Dis

You wore a snuggie to your prom, and you thought it looked good,
ya got it from ya momma and it gave you wood
It didn't really matter cause your date didnt show
His pimp wouldn't let your daddy leave the stroll

Ya showed up drunk at ma quincañera
made my abuelita cry I said bitch don't scare her
lets take it outside like a coupla cholas
May bring my hermanita, bitch a true high roller

Ya daddy won ya momma in a game of dice
You blew em both for luck but he rolled snake eyes
Ya granmama tried ta buy a heart transplant
but they didn't take food stamps, how bout that?

Ya got a package from Oprah by Fedral Express
it was a gold invitation to the follwing address:
I need ya for a show on prostitutes
who wear fake ass gucci crocodile skin boots

You never get a Tyra mail, but here's a letter from Obama
It came with a warrant that he issued for your mama,
We've come to a conclusion, after much consideration
You're the ugliest bitch in the entire nation
You a broke back crack bitch lookin like the blair witch
Facebook status sez "I think I got tha bootie-itch"
Ya look at yourself it's a like a brick in tha mirror
Don't just break tha glass girl, ya make it disappear

old mr french fry sittin on a fence,
tryin ta make a dollar out of 50¢
hatchi catchi liberace ooo la la
I gotcha Ooo wah juicy penny on tha ska

Oh they call me Miss Dis, 'cause I put em all down
I'm the dissin'-ist bitch, you better ask around
So set your damn watch to Eleven Fifty Nine
And enjoy your last minute, cause bitch you're mine.

RUZOik7RJao

http://www.transproofed.com
Ava (Calpernia Addams) is a transsexual woman who has recently completed her transition. Her friend and mentor Joyce (Andrea James) has long advised her to get her apartment transproofed, a slang term for hiding all the evidence that shes trans.

In Avas case, thats a tall order: Ava came up through the club scene as a showgirl, and both Ava and her apartment are vibrant, sexy, and full of clues.

Ava calls Joyce for a last-minute transproofing because her hot new boyfriend Mike (Joel Lambert) is coming over for dinner that night. Joyce races over to help Ava give the place an Extreme Ho Makeover more in Joyces aesthetic: plain and non-descript. Joyce reminds Ava that passing as female means blending in and not drawing attention to yourself. Both Ava and her apartment are garish and flashy, and the two set to work making it look like a drab straight girls apartment.

Set to the pulsing club single Next, they go from room to room, leaving no stone unturned: closets, medicine cabinets, bookshelves, and even the fridge. As Ava watches more and more of who she is being hidden from view, she starts to have second thoughts about how much she is willing to sacrifice to live stealth, where no one knows she is trans.

Will Ava be able to walk away from everything that made her who she is and start fresh? Or will she risk losing another guy she really likes by telling him shes trans?

9fWiSSxn6xA

http://www.transproofed.com
Ava (Calpernia Addams) is a transsexual woman who has recently completed her transition. Her friend and mentor Joyce (Andrea James) has long advised her to get her apartment transproofed, a slang term for hiding all the evidence that shes trans.

In Avas case, thats a tall order: Ava came up through the club scene as a showgirl, and both Ava and her apartment are vibrant, sexy, and full of clues.

Ava calls Joyce for a last-minute transproofing because her hot new boyfriend Mike (Joel Lambert) is coming over for dinner that night. Joyce races over to help Ava give the place an Extreme Ho Makeover more in Joyces aesthetic: plain and non-descript. Joyce reminds Ava that passing as female means blending in and not drawing attention to yourself. Both Ava and her apartment are garish and flashy, and the two set to work making it look like a drab straight girls apartment.

Set to the pulsing club single Next, they go from room to room, leaving no stone unturned: closets, medicine cabinets, bookshelves, and even the fridge. As Ava watches more and more of who she is being hidden from view, she starts to have second thoughts about how much she is willing to sacrifice to live stealth, where no one knows she is trans.

Will Ava be able to walk away from everything that made her who she is and start fresh? Or will she risk losing another guy she really likes by telling him shes trans?

9fWiSSxn6xA

http://www.calpernia.com/diary
Calpernia reads her self-written monologue, "Homespun", at the VDay LA 2004 benefit performance of The Vagina Monologues put on by her and Andrea James through Deep Stealth Productions.

This monologue was written and performed by Calpernia Addams as part of "The Vagina Monologues" in Los Angeles, California. The production was mentored by playwright Eve Ensler and Jane Fonda. Produced by Andrea James, directed by Calpernia Addams.

m-lIIDArcso

http://www.calpernia.com/diary
http://www.genderlife.com
http://www.advocate.com/issue_ story_ektid59850.asp
Hi Kids! Please get the September 2008 issue of "The Advocate" magazine, in which they gather a number of people from the GLBT community and talk about body image accompanied by gorgeous naked photos by celebrated photographer Eric Schwabel. This is probably one of the most intimate and personal interviews I've done since the "Soldier's Girl" days, but I felt like the topic of body image is an important one. These issues have driven the course of my life, as they do for so many, and we all felt it was important to discuss them.

The Advocate Issue 1015: The Naked Truth, with Calpernia Addams: http://www.advocate.com/issue_ story_ektid59850.asp (Interview, video and photos)

iX0g5yVXAoA

http://www.calpernia.com/itune s
http://www.transproofed.com
http://www.calpernia.com
From the Deep Stealth short comedy "Transproofed", Matthew McPeck's remix of "Next!"
I'm the next leading lady, of the silver screen,
Do you think that you can play, the man of my dreams,
So submit your application and I'll take a look,
If your audition goes well, we may go off book,

The casting couch is quite comfy, If ya know what I mean,
I'm lookin for a man that can handle my scene
Take your shirt off, learn your lines, lemme see what ya got,
I can make you a star if you can make me hot!


NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

Do you want the part or dont'cha, I don't have all day,
Ev'rything depends on me, and I'll have my way,
Your love scene better be realistic, or we'll do it again,
If you want this award, you best be in it to win,

You may have to get naked, trust me it's for the art,
you know there's twenty guys behind you and they all want this part,
Go ahead and get dressed, yeah I love what you do,
Don't call us, We'll call you.


NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

You may have to get naked, trust me it's for the art,
you know there's twenty guys behind you and they all want this part,
Yeah this role could make or break you, hope you're up to the task,
If you need some private coaching, boy, you just hafta ask,
Hope you're open to suggest, cause I've got some ideas,
If you have any questions, baby, I'm all ears,
Go ahead and get dressed, yeah I love what you do,
Don't call us, We'll call you.

NEXT! If you don't measure up, yeah
NEXT! There's another one behind you
NEXT! You get no second chances
NEXT! G G G get it a going now!

p6xfgtVLLn4

Get it for 99¢:
http://www.calpernia.com/music
http://www.andreajames.com
http://www.genderlife.com
http://www.transproofed.com
Music by Calpernia Addams
Directed by Andrea James
Lyrics:
They call me Miss Dis, because I put em all down
I'm the dissin'-ist bitch, you better ask around
So set your damn watch to Eleven Fifty Nine
And enjoy your last minute, cause bitch you're mine.

I'monna cut you up like you wouldn't believe
monna crisp you up crunichier than Paris's weave
I'm gonna lay in a burn, atcha can't dismiss
If you wanna enemy, you don't wanna Miss Dis

You wore a snuggie to your prom, and you thought it looked good,
ya got it from ya momma and it gave you wood
It didn't really matter cause your date didnt show
His pimp wouldn't let your daddy leave the stroll

Ya showed up drunk at ma quincañera
made my abuelita cry I said bitch don't scare her
lets take it outside like a coupla cholas
May bring my hermanita, bitch a true high roller

Ya daddy won ya momma in a game of dice
You blew em both for luck but he rolled snake eyes
Ya granmama tried ta buy a heart transplant
but they didn't take food stamps, how bout that?

Ya got a package from Oprah by Fedral Express
it was a gold invitation to the follwing address:
I need ya for a show on prostitutes
who wear fake ass gucci crocodile skin boots

You never get a Tyra mail, but here's a letter from Obama
It came with a warrant that he issued for your mama,
We've come to a conclusion, after much consideration
You're the ugliest bitch in the entire nation
You a broke back crack bitch lookin like the blair witch
Facebook status sez "I think I got tha bootie-itch"
Ya look at yourself it's a like a brick in tha mirror
Don't just break tha glass girl, ya make it disappear

old mr french fry sittin on a fence,
tryin ta make a dollar out of 50¢
hatchi catchi liberace ooo la la
I gotcha Ooo wah juicy penny on tha ska

Oh they call me Miss Dis, 'cause I put em all down
I'm the dissin'-ist bitch, you better ask around
So set your damn watch to Eleven Fifty Nine
And enjoy your last minute, cause bitch you're mine.

RUZOik7RJao

Diary: http://www.calpernia.com/diary
Videos: http://www.genderlife.com
Calpernia on iTunes: http://www.calpernia.com/itune s
Free Calpernia Music: http://www.calpernia.com/freem usic
MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/calpern iamusic

OMG, had a great time performing in Robbie D/Jer Ber Jones' Telekinesis Cabaret!
JANUARY 6th 2009 LINE UP
CREATED AND HOSTED BY
robbie daniels jr.
STARRING
calpernia addams
mecca andrews
diamondback annie
tara avise
lou becker
squeaky blonde
mario diaz
sir heffington
selene luna
nina mcneely
prince poppycock
douglas little &
leila bazzani
lights by NELSTAR

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