 Travis Bradley once wrote, happiness is synthetic. You either create it or you don't. The happiness that lasts is earned through your habits. One mistake that many people make is that they sought ways to be happy, yet ignoring those bad habits which they portray that steal their happiness. The bitter truth is that it is almost impossible to develop new habits without thus breaking the old ones. In this video, I will share with you 13 reasons why you are not happy. 1. You feel too much stress. Have you ever wished for stress to be taken out of your life? Well, almost everyone has had that desire at some point in their life. But pressure is part of life and the only people that are free from it are those who are dead. Still, stress levels vary and having too much of it can be an enemy to your happiness. Bear in mind that stress is not objective. It affects individuals differently. While others may genuinely thrive in a particular degree of stress, others may not be able to hold on. In all, stressing yourself beyond your capacity hurts your happiness. Therefore, understand your ability and work with it, only increasing it slowly and steadily. 2. You expect too much. It is human nature to be expectant, especially from those we love. But do you know that placing high expectations on others can make you unhappy? In American cartoonist Bill Waterson's comic strip, Carvin & Hobbes, Carvin made a remark which is an excellent recipe for a happy life. I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations. The higher the expectation you place on someone, the higher the hurt and disappointment you feel when things do not go your way. On the other hand, you will be happier if you fix average expectations and get a higher result. 3. You are ungrateful. A group of researchers once carried a study which showed that individuals who kept a list of the things they are grateful for exhibited increased well-being than those who kept a list of things that irritated them or made them feel neutral. Thus, they concluded that a conscious focus on blessings may have emotional and interpersonal benefits. One primary reason why many people feel sad today is that rather than be thankful for the things they have, they focus on what others have that they wish they had. The next time you attempt it to look at what you do not have, think first about the things you have been blessed with than others are praying for, then you will feel happy. 4. You compare yourself with people on social media. A survey in 2016 determined that Facebook users were 55% more likely to feel stressed, whereas taking a break from Facebook led to an 18% increase is being more likely to feel present in the moment, which itself is a mood booster. One thing most people do not know is that whatever you see online is what people want you to see. Not the fact. So when you see people posting big cars, money and designers online, you begin to question your capability, which causes you to overthink. Author Travis Bradbury once advised in an article for Forbes, you don't have to give up social media to be happy, you just take it sparenly and with a grain of salt. 5. You hang around negative people. The mood of the people around you has a great impact on your mood. If you are a person who always stays around negative and pessimistic individuals, your outlook towards life will be infected with negativity. American pastor, author and televangelist Joel Osteen once said, you cannot expect to live a positive life when you are hanging out with negative people. Negative people have a way of compelling their ill feelings into you, so much that you lack your self-confidence and happiness. 6. You want to please everyone. As much as being liked and appreciated is a beautiful feeling. Finding people who accept and love you for who you are is a more delightful feeling. If you always try to impress others, your happiness is suffering drastically. What only does the habit of attempting to please everyone stand in the way of your happiness? It also gives people the room to manipulate you. Psychotherapist Sean Grover also remarked that the more a person hustles, for approval, the less other people feel at ease with him or her. And when people begin to feel uneasy around you, the whole essence of trying to please them is defeated and this can cause you to become unhappy. 7. You are scared of the future. Every human is coerced by the frontal lobe to think about the future regularly. Thinking about the future is not out of place, but how you feel about it matters a lot. Too many thoughts about the future can cause you to get scared, so much so that we begin to quiver and doubt if your present efforts can give you the life you long to have. Many people become so overly ambitious that they lose track of their goals because of fear. Indeed, the future is filled with many uncertainties. Worrying about the obstacles won't take them away. It will only make you anxious and sad. Instead, channel the energy you use to think about the future obstacles into making your present the best. 8. You keep thinking about the past. It is generally reported that the human mind runs around 60,000 thoughts per day and more than 95% of those thoughts are the repeated thoughts. People spend so much time thinking of either their past or the future. Their heads are clouded with thoughts of past hurts, betrayals, mistakes and wishes and most of these memories cause them sadness. Constant thought about the past will not take you back to undo those actions. You can only focus on the present and attempt to make right the wrong you can. For the things you cannot change, take counsel from TDJakes who said, the past is the past. Let it go. 9. You are always alone. Mother Teresa said, the most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved. Although being alone does not equate to being lonely, it tends to lead to loneliness. Even if you do not possess the enthusiastic sanguine personality, share a few moments with people. If you are always isolating yourself from people, you are heading towards loneliness. And with loneliness comes more isolation, an enormous sadness. According to Travis Bradford, the author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0 on Forbes, socializing even when you do not enjoy it is great for your mood. 10. You are stuck in your comfort zone. An anonymous person once said, a comfort zone is a beautiful place but nothing grows there. How do you feel when you look back at your life and realize that you have been in the same position for a long time? Let me guess. Sad. Well, that's how you should feel. The comfort zone is comforting but it is a principal reason behind your lack of progress. Many people who seem happy in their comfort zones are not fulfilled dip down. There is always a longing to go out and pursue their dreams. However, they lack the courage to come out of that zone so they get stuck in it. If you want to live a life of regrets stay in your comfort zone otherwise step out and pursue your dreams. 11. You don't have goals. The peculiar thing about goals is that they give a sense of purpose and direction. Scientist Sonja Lumbramiski in the How of Happiness once explained that working towards a meaningful life goal is one of the most important strategies for becoming lastingly happier. The reason for your present unhappiness is most likely because you do not set goals for yourself. Although holding yourself to impossible standards can be pressuring, you should set attainable and time-based goals for yourself. No matter how hard you work, without setting goals you will feel empty and unaccomplished. 12. Not being true to your emotions. For some reason, best known to them, many individuals believe that being emotionally intelligent means lying to yourself about real negative emotion and acting the opposite feeling. But according to therapist and self-loved coach, Jennifer Twardowski, thinking that we need to be positive all the time is not the right way to go. What happens when you continually allow debris into your sink? It comes to a stage where the pipe gets blocked and water cannot flow through it anymore. This is what happens to you when you keep swallowing negative emotions without letting them out. Deep down, you are filled with sadness and a point will come when you cannot take it anymore. 13. You are broke. A funny yet interesting post that trended on social media some time back said, Money cannot buy happiness but it is better to cry in a Lamborghini than on a bicycle. Many people believe that money has nothing to do with happiness because happiness is a state of mind. Well, that belief is agreeable but cash has the potency to boost a person's state of mind. Money may not buy happiness but money sure enhances it. The fact that not every rich person is happy does not mean that if you give money to a poor man, he will not be happy. Get up and work. The lack of money is making you unhappy. Happiness is a decision, a choice that you alone can make. Make up your mind today to find that thing that makes you sad and defeated.