 I'll begin reading at verse one, Ephesians chapter six, I'll read to verse three, we'll get into our study. Ephesians chapter six, beginning at verse one, reading to verse three, children obey your parents and the Lord for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth. I'll read verse four. And you fathers do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. And so today we're going to be looking at, or tonight we're going to be looking at raising our children, those of us who are parents raising our children in the Lord. And I'm going to begin by saying it's a spiritual task that we work at very hard. It's one of those tasks in life that we must be 100% dedicated to. There are those who will say today, well, we're going to let our children decide what faith, if any, they're going to practice. But that's a big mistake. You see, if we don't bring them to Jesus, the world will lead them away from him. So everything that is in this world, it's called in scripture the world, this world system. Everything in this world system is energized by Satan and is opposed to God. In 1 John 2, 15 through 17, John said, do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love for the Father is not in them. For everything in the world, the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, the pride of life comes not from the Father, but from the world and the world and its desires pass away. But whoever does the will of God lives forever. And so the things that are part of this, the makeup of this world, lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, pride of life, those things are all the things that make up the system that is opposed to God. Those are the things that we see all the time. We see those things, those themes in commercials on TV. We see those themes everywhere. You see, everything about this world system rebels against God's rule. Almost every song, every book, every TV program, every movie, every video game, every chat room, every billboard, every school they attend give a message 100% in opposition to their faith, their moral values, the relational choices, even their gender. Do you know that the average amount of ads that children view are, this is, I don't know how accurate this could be, but if you take into consideration the amount of time that they watch TV and people watch TV, if you take that into consideration, how many commercial breaks there are, the average amount of ads they view are over 5,000. And so that's amazing. Listen, I grew up watching, this will give you some interest, I'm sure. I grew up watching Disney cartoons and TV programs. That used to be published as family friendly entertainment. So I was looking this up and the Disney Channel launched in 1983, Disney XD launched in 2009, Disney Junior 2011, and shows on Disney Plus along with a short-lived tuned Disney have all featured lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender LGBTQ characters in their programming. So when you have your children watching this, at one time you may have been raised thinking these are family friendly and these are innocent programs, but every one of those on the Disney Channel have had these characters in their programming. The plan to capture the minds of our younger generation is obvious. And that's the reason why we carefully observe and we monitor our children, especially when they're young and impressionable. And why does that matter? Won't they just adopt the values of their parents? Someone asked, well, not necessarily, they will more commonly adopt the values of their culture. And the culture that they are saturated with is a culture that is anti-God. Now, they won't necessarily appreciate God and the things of the Lord. So they sometimes will rebel, but that's because every human being is born with a sinful, fallen nature. Psalm 2215 says it like this. Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him. You see, even secular observers agree. The Minnesota Crime Commission reported that every baby starts life as a little savage. I raised four savages. He is completely selfish and self-centered. He wants what he wants when he wants it, his bottle, his mother's attention, his playmate's toys, his uncle's watch or whatever. Deny him these and he seethes with rage and aggressiveness, which would be murderous or he not so helpless. He's dirty. He has no morals, no knowledge, no developed skills. This means that all children, not just certain children, but all children are born delinquent. If permitted to continue in their self-centered world of infancy, given free reign to their impulsive actions to satisfy each want, every child would grow up a criminal, a thief, a killer or a rapist. Now that again is the Minnesota Crime Commission report. So the task of the Christian parent is to bring our children to Jesus Christ. And if we neglect to do this, the world will take them away. Every Christian parent is to be an evangelist. Every Christian parent is to train their children in the things of the Lord. You see, every Christian parent ought to see the children as gifts that God has lent to us. Psalm 127.3 says it like this, children are a heritage from the Lord. Offspring are a reward from him. When he says children are a heritage, that word heritage speaks of a possession and inheritance or a portion. So they are a blessing that God gives to us, a reward. And because they're gifts to us, we're to treasure them. We're to care for them. And we also protect them in every way possible as we attempt to bring them to Jesus Christ. Now, sometimes our efforts to guard our children from bad influence is ridiculed. There are those who speak of concerned parents as helicopter parents. There are others who are calling parents domestic terrorists, if they disagree with school curricula. So there's a battle going on. We know this, and the battle is for your children's mind. Karl Marx said this, the education of all children from the moment that they can get along without a mother's care shall be in state institutions. So life has been described as a race, a race that we are running in. Some see this as a sprint, others consider it a marathon. I look at life now as a relay, and it's a race that is won by successful exchanges of the baton. You see, many relays have been lost by a poor exchange. But we've been handed the baton of faith by faithful witnesses, and these faithful believers guarded the message of faith as they handed it to us. In 1 Corinthians 15, verse 3, Paul said it like this. He said, I delivered to you first of all that which I also received. So that which I've taken, I've given to you. I see our faith as being a baton that we hand on to future generations. And he said, Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures. This is what I've handed to you, the core of the gospel is what Paul was saying. So we have the responsibility of taking the message and sharing it with other people. We hand the baton of faith to our children and to our children's children. In the Old Testament Book of Deuteronomy chapter four, verse nine, Moses said, watch out, be careful never to forget what you yourselves have seen. Do not let these memories escape from your mind as long as you live, and be sure to pass them on to your children and your grandchildren. Now as a parent, I have four children that are, I still call my babies, but you know, they're old, you know. What can I say? I'm not, but they are somehow I succeeded in not being old, but they failed. They're old, but as a parent, I have the responsibility of representing Jesus to my children. And as a grandparent, I let the parents perform their task, but I still model faith. You know, one of the things that people have said, every grandparent in this room will agree with this when I say it. I'll say it briefly, but it would be, it would have been kind of neat to skip the kids and just go to the grandkids, but that doesn't happen. So bringing our children to faith in Christ, obviously of utmost importance. Again, it's a spiritual task. Again, we work at it and we must be fully dedicated to it. And we need to continue to encourage our kids to have faith in Christ because again, too many discouraged that we have no guarantee of success, but that serves not as something that makes us depressed. That serves as an incentive to continue. You see, children are under constant onslaught to compromise. I mentioned it a moment ago again, peer pressure, sexual temptation, alcohol, drugs, vaping, violence, gender confusion, racial issues are things they deal with and they deal with them daily. According to a recent CDC report, the disruption of daily life as teens and young adults knew it before the COVID pandemic with lockdowns and social distancing orders may have contributed to the rise in suicide attempts. According to the website UCLA Health Suicide is the second leading cause of death among people aged 15 to 24 in the United States. Nearly 20% of high school students report serious thoughts of suicide. 9% have made an attempt to take their own lives. So our children are going through difficulties and we need to be there for them. And that's why we influence them. And the way we influence them is that we influence them to have hope in Jesus Christ. Now in raising kids, the first several years are of utmost importance. It's at that time that we're giving the most opportunity to diligently evangelize them. And sometimes those years are actually lost because people yield to distractions. I was speaking to a young parent just the other day, just a week or two ago, and they were saying that friends of theirs who at one time had been following the Lord seemed to be solid, raising their kids to follow the Lord had come to them for some advice because one of the kids had gotten involved in the soccer league that plays on Sundays. And so for months into a year or two, they have no longer been attending church services and because Sunday is now dedicated to soccer and not to Jesus. And they're coming to people saying, how can I deal with this? What should I do? And the answer is obvious. You have to ask yourself what is more important, a soccer trophy or a kid who follows the Lord? You have to ask yourself those questions and all. You know, Aristotle once said, give me a child until he's seven. I'll show you the man. Adolf Hitler said, he alone who owns the youth gains the future. So this reveals the importance of early education and this reveals the need to safeguard our children. There has been an assault on children, their innocence and all through education for many years. Again, in our time, sexuality, gender identification, climate concerns, revisionist history, the evil of being white can be found in growing amounts of schools. Evolution is fact in schools, not theory. And religion is evil if it's Christianity. So this is a spiritual war at its root and it magnifies the need for Christian upbringing. And so Paul begins here in verse one and he speaks first to the children. Notice what he says, verse one, children, obey your parents and the Lord for this is right. Verse two, honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth. So he begins by speaking to the children, he commands them, obey your parents in the Lord, obey your fathers and your mothers. Children rely on your parents' wisdom, rely on their experience. They may know something. If you listen in Proverbs 16 31, the silver haired head is a crown of glory if it's found in the way of righteousness and isn't died. And in Job 12 verse 12, wisdom is with aged men and with length of days understanding. We're living in a time when those who are growing older are regarded as useless. Older people are not looked at as being needed or necessary. And so I see that as absolute turning of things upside down. My parents would do God that they were still alive. There are so many things I wish I'd have taken time to ask them. So many things I could have asked them about family history, so many things that could ask them that I can now never ask them, things that I would have loved to have known if I had to take them at time. And I was sharing with my daughter and son-in-law just this last week we're talking and visiting and I was sharing with them this. I said, you know, I was reading something recently where the individual who had written this particular article had said that he was speaking to a man and he had asked this man, are your parents still alive? And the man said, yes, my parents are still alive. And so the one who was speaking, interviewing said to him, well, how old are your parents? And he says, well, my parents are like 72 and 71. Oh, do they live around you? No, no, they don't. They live in another state. Oh, really? Do you ever see them? Oh, yeah, I see them twice a year. And so the guy interviewing him said this, and this is something that many of us may want to think about. The man who was interviewing him said this, you see them twice a year? He said, yes, they're in another state. Yes, but you don't visibly see them. No, only twice a year. He says, you realize, of course, at their age, at their age, they probably have another seven or eight years of life to live. You realize that. And you realize that what you just told me is you will see your parents 16 times before they die. And I was talking to my son-in-law about that. I see them all the time. But I thought about that, how we get caught up in our own lives and we forget that there's a generation that has wisdom and experience that we ought to be tapping into. But because our society worships youth so much and innovation so much and actually puts the old people down, we're failing to tap into the reservoir of wisdom that God has given to us. And so, children, you're to obey your parents and the Lord, the scripture says. Now, he goes on to say, honor your father and mother. It's the first commandment with promise. When he says honor, to honor means to esteem highly. It speaks of holding something in great value. And so he's saying you need to honor your parents. Why? It gives you the opportunity to live life to its fullest. He says that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth. In Proverbs seven, verse one through three, it says it like this, my son, keep my words, treasure my commands within you. Keep my commands and live my law as the apple of your eye. Bind them on your fingers. Write them on the tablet of your heart. My godly parents' advice can save from heartache and pain. We've gained much experience. We can help our children to avoid the mistakes that we made. I remember one of my children, I was speaking to them and I said, you need to be careful about these things, whatever it may have been at that time. But they said to me, well, I'm forming my own testimony. And so after I finished slapping them, I just kidding, obviously, I said, here's the problem with that statement. I'm raising you in a way that you don't fashion such a testimony. I'm raising you not to have the kind of testimony that if you don't listen, you're going to have. That's how I'm raising you. Anyone in here who has a testimony that when you give it to people, they kind of blink and say, wow, you did that. Because sometimes people look at testimonies like soap operas, tell me more, tell me more. Oh, I'll tune in next week, right? The ones who give their testimonies often are clouding it, sometimes exaggerating it, but they're clouding it very often. And you think, what a testimony they have, but they think, what a painful history I lived. You don't want their testimony. You want a testimony where God just was your God from childhood to adulthood, and then you just enter into glory. That's the testimony you want. And yet, today, it seems to be just the opposite. You know, when you're young, you think your friends are the most important thing you have. They're actually your family. For me, it was so. I'm pretty sure it may be the same way more than likely it is. It's just human trait. So I actually put my friends above my parents. Their advice meant more to me than the advice of my parents by far. But I found out the hard way that they did not love me the way that my parents did. You see, they didn't necessarily counsel me to do the right thing when I was going through a temptation. They were more of the sort who would say, well, go ahead and drink. Go ahead and sleep with that person. It's no big deal. Go ahead and do those things. Go ahead and take the car. You know, your parents aren't around. That's how I kind of learned to drive is when my parents were gone. My dad didn't have keys to his truck. He just had this little kill switch. So dad would be gone. See you later, daddy. There I'd go at 15 years old driving around the neighborhood. I taught myself to drive by stealing my dad's car. And my friends thought that was cool. And that's the way it was. It's cool to do these kinds of things. I still remember I was sharing this with someone the other day. I still remember I was 15 years old and I hear a knock on the door. It's about seven or eight on a Sunday night. And I open the side door and it's my friend Ray. And he says, come on, we got a car. None of us had licenses. And so you do. So I went to my dad dad. I'm going out with the guys for a while. My dad says, all right, son, he didn't know we jump into this big old thing. It's like a suburban. It's huge. None of us knew how to drive. And we went driving through the neighbor. I still remember that steering wheel was as big as it was huge. And we're just going in and out. None of us could drive. They had stolen it from a car lot just down the street from my house. Yeah, that was fun. But that's what we did. We used to do dumb things. We would go, I don't know. I'm going to tap into the past. There's got to be somebody here. I'm looking around. See some white hair. Stanley, Stanley. Two blocks off the Santa Ana freeway 11 East Firestone, Stanley Chevrolet. How many of you know that side? There's old people in here. Stanley, Stanley, Stanley Chevrolet, two blocks off the Santa Ana freeway, 119 80 East Firestone, Stanley Chevrolet. We used to steal, well, not steal cars. We would just go in and tear them up. They used to leave the keys. How stupid. They would leave the keys in the car. And my friends and I would get into them. We'd put our foot on the brake. We'd put it in the drive. We'd bring it up to a couple thousand RPM, let go of the brake a little bit and smoke the wheels. And we would do that until the salespeople came running out to chase us down the street. That was kind of my, that was my training program when I was 15. We did a lot of stupid, crazy things. But those silly, stupid things which were felonies were done in many ways. It was done in an innocent fashion. We didn't realize how bad that was. We really didn't. I do now. When I was a kid, I had a girlfriend kind of, she didn't like me. So I wanted to do something for her. So I burglarized the jewelry store, Hudson's jewelry in, in Whittier and took a tire iron. Well, first I went to a liquor store and stole a half gallon of seagrams. Then a friend of mine named Harold and I, well, I got him drunk. I was going to steal it. I just needed an accomplice. So off we went. I took a tire iron. I broke the window. We grabbed some diamond rings and I was going to give her a diamond ring. But we got caught. We spent the night in, in jail in Whittier. And I still remember my friend Bill and my friend Ronnie who came and saw us there and behind the bars. We thought it was funny. I mean, we were singing Jail House Rock and we thought this is really funny. It was an eight by 10 and he says, I'll race you around the, the, the cell. You know, we were, we thought we were really funny till we sewed it up and woke up and realized we're behind bars in Whittier, the, the Whittier jail. And my friend Bill and my friend Ronnie came to see us and Bill, I still remember Bill looking at me and telling me, you're stupid, man. You are so stupid. He's going to come to see me tomorrow. He's watching this right now. Bill, I wasn't stupid. No, I was. I mean, we did dumb things. Kids do that. Get in trouble and all of that. My friends, not all of my friends wanted me to do the right thing. Most of them said, go ahead and do the wrong thing. I'm pretty sure your friends are the same way. Pretty sure. But when I, I burglarized that jewelry store, it was my parents who bailed me out. And it was my parents who mortgaged their home so they could get Stanley H. Brown, a lawyer from Beverly Hills, to represent me so I didn't go to jail because it was a felony to steal the amount that I stole. It wasn't my friends who bailed me out as my parents. It wasn't my friends who cried. It was my parents. And so a long time ago, the Lord began to teach me, try to teach me to trust, to trust the wisdom of a godly parent. It saves, saves you from pain and bad decisions. And it is wise for children to heed the directions and commands of their godly parents. But notice it's, it speaks of obeying their parents. Notice in the Lord, Paul is not saying, obey if they command you to disobey God, you're to obey God rather than man. But when you have godly parents who are raising you in the ways of the Lord, he says, this is a way that you can be blessed by God. God's through your obedience, length of days and a long life and peace, they will be added to you. And so as he continues on, he has spoken to the children, but he just says this one verse, you fathers, verse four, do not provoke your children to wrath, bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Fathers, don't provoke your children. Now, why would he speak to the fathers? Because the father is the great influence in the home. We see the result of the absence of fathers today in our society. We need to know that as Christian fathers, we have tremendous influence on our children. According to the Journal of Marriage and Family written, this article was written by Paul Amato and Fernando Rivera, 82% of studies on father involvement and child wellbeing published since 1980 found significant associations between positive father involvement and offspring well-being. Frank Fürstenberg and Kathleen Harris, writing for the University of Pennsylvania, reported that children who feel a closeness and warmth with their father are twice as likely to enter college, 75% less likely to have a child in their teen years, 80% less likely to be jailed, and half as likely to become depressed. Focus on the family entitled, has an article entitled, The Significance of a Father's Influence, and they write fathers encourage competition, which engenders independence. Mothers promote equity, creating a sense of security. Dads emphasize conceptual communication, which helps kids to expand their vocabulary and intellectual capacities. Moms major in sympathy, care, and help, thus demonstrating the importance of relationships. Dads tend to see their child in relation to the rest of the world. Moms tend to see the rest of the world in relation to their child, that's true. Neither style of parenting is adequate in and of itself. Taken together, they balance each other out and equip the up and coming generation with a healthy, well-rounded approach to life. It is just a fact that we are raised best when we have the blessing of a father and a mother in the same home. It's just a fact. And it's a fact when that mother and father are believers in Christ that that creates even a greater amount of percentages of growing up without making some huge mistakes. It's just a blessing to have our children. You see, fathers are to will the proper godly authority, but they do so, Paul is saying, with gentleness and love. He is saying to avoid mistreating your children. Why? Because if you mistreat them, they will be hardened in their sins. Now, parents do not resist correcting children. They do so though with affectionate concern. They don't do it with an out of control, angry rage. He says in verse four that we bring up our children in training and admonition of the Lord. The word training speaks of instruction that develops a purity and holiness in life. Admonition speaks of appealing to their understanding. It speaks of exhorting them. So you teach them in a way that helps them to see what the value of purity is, but you encourage them as you speak and share with understanding how they might see how this works out. And so we nourish and we discipline them, but we do so with an understanding of the Lord Jesus Christ. And we do it by His word. You see, our instructions are examples. And that's what we add. We give them instruction, but we give them our example and they combine the two and it helps to encourage them to live a life that blesses the Lord. Again, faith in Christ isn't natural for them. They are born with a rebellious nature that they get from their mom. And I don't know how to, you know, that's not true. They have what is called the Adamic nature. It comes from us, from the man. And so they're born with this nature and we are to help shape them. Proverbs 29, 15, the rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. And that is so true. So what are we, what are we to do? While we raise our children in the Lord, we train our kids and the things of Jesus Christ. It's not the job of the church. It's not the job of the school. It's not the job of our friends. It's not the job of the childcare provider. It's not even the job of the entire family. It's the parent's job. It's a father's job. It's a mother's job. Now, of course, I am very grateful for a community that shares our values, but they learn how faith works in the home. You see, the parent is to direct and not break the spirit, but to shape it. Now again, under ordinary circumstances, this job falls upon the father. When I had small children, the Lord began to open up opportunities for me to do ministry outside of the home. But prior to that, and even during that season in our lives, the one thing I did take very seriously, I encourage all of us in this room to do this, I'm assuming all of us do, is my children were raised from the time they were born with prayer. I mean, when they were small, I still remember when they were small. I'm talking about kids in the high chairs eating dinner with us. I would reach over and I would take them, put my finger around the little wrist like that. I wouldn't hold it tightly, but I would just put my finger around it and I would say, daddy's going to pray. I did that every day. And then I'd say, dear Jesus, thank you for this food. Very simple prayer. And I did that with them. From Monday and Tuesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, we had devotions. I gave my children devotions every day of their young lives into high school, every day. The only days that we didn't have devotions with me leading were Wednesday and Sunday night. The reason they didn't have devotions on Wednesday and Sunday night is simple. I was teaching Bible studies here in this church, and so they were in church. And so they got the word of God seven days a week. When I was gone, my wife would take over the responsibility. My wife would pray with them. And when they're small, we would sit them in the front room. And first we had the one, then we had two, then finally four, and ranging from various ages. And we would sit them there when they were all able to be together. But we did it anyway, but we finally had them all sitting there. My Anna, who is my baby, would have been maybe two or three at the time. So they weren't long studies. It wasn't like a church service where I received an offering saying some worship. It was maybe five minutes, six minutes. I would sit them down. And you know what they learned to do? Because kids are kids. I mean, they would poke each other and they'd be all like, you know, and you'd be sitting there going, I don't even want to do this, you know. But I taught them this. The minute I opened, the minute I opened the Bible, they shut up. I taught them to do that. I had the Bible on my lap and they'd be talking and this and that. And then I'd wait till they noticed and I would open the Bible. When I opened the Bible, I at first said, the Bible's open, your mouths are closed. The Bible's open, you now listen. And they eventually learned that. So to the point that after doing that for a long time, I would walk in, they'd be doing what they do. I'd open the Bible. They would hush. Why? Because I taught them from the very early age, the word of God is the key in our family. The word of God matters. And we're going to hear God's word together. I would teach them little studies through the Gospels. Sometimes we would teach them different things. I'd take them through books. Sometimes we'd get a book, a missionaries, a life of a missionary. I'd read paragraphs, two paragraphs, whatever, maybe a chapter if it was small enough. Talk to them about how this person loves Jesus and serves the Lord. And they had that from the time they were very small into high school and they still had their season of rebellion. I can't imagine children who are neglected. I can't imagine how they're going to, they're going to learn the things of the Lord if their parents aren't teaching them them. I taught my kids and I don't say that with a boastful spirit. I hope it doesn't sound that way. I just did. That's what I did because I knew that if I didn't teach them about Jesus, the world would teach them something else. I knew that. If I don't teach them who he is, they will teach them what he's not. I knew that. I knew that there would be arguments. I knew that there would be problems. I knew that they were going to go through struggles and I knew that. And so I honest to goodness, Marie and I together decided, we want our children to know Jesus Christ. That to me is the most important thing in my life. One great evangelist once said, I have traveled the world making converts around the world, but sadly my own two sons don't follow Jesus. I didn't want to be that. So I concentrated on my children. I spent time devoting myself to that. I would take about on dates. I'd take about to places, talk to them, share with them. I did the best that I could because that was my responsibility. Isaiah 3819 says, the Father shall make known your truth to the children. In 1st Timothy 5, verse 8, Paul said, if anyone doesn't provide for his own, especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith is worse than an unbeliever. And so I, I poured into my children. You see the Proverbs, Proverbs 226 says it like this, train up a child in the way he should go when he's old, he will not depart from it. And I've seen that to be true. There are seasons when they, they may be floating out, moving out. But it's like we put a spiritual and I don't know another way to put it as a spiritual kind of a chain on them that they would go out and stretch to the very end of it, but they couldn't get away. You know, when my honor was about three years old, believe it or not, I used to play a lot of sports and we had sports teams here. And I played a lot of softball. So Marie would come with the kids to watch dad play. And Mike, my honor was a wanderer. She was a wanderer. We had to keep our eyes on her. So what did we do? We got one of those baby leashes. We're talking 36 years ago. She was three years old. And we tied her up to the backstop. And so she'd be, because she'd wander away. And I wanted Marie to visit and our friends knew that we weren't, you know, bad dog, bad dog. We weren't doing that to her, you know, we were, we were given her freedom, but with, you know, restrictions. And, and that's, that's what happens when you teach your children the ways of the Lord, they have freedoms, but internally they will have restrictions. They won't know they're doing wrong. They won't know the conscience and spirit of God working together will awaken them to that. So you pour into them, pour into them, because you can't follow them all the time. You can't be with them all the time. Eventually they're on their own. They're making their own decisions. So that we knew. And it may feel like, oh, it's forever. Are these kids ever going to be out of the house? For some reason they're like a yo-yo. They keep coming back. But you know what? That's your whole life. Is you, you, you, that's what you want in many ways. You want the connection, not that they should live there forever, of course, but the connection with them, that they're free to do that, that they want to be there and they do that because they love you. Now, how can I parent my child? What can I do to train them up? Well, let me, let me share something with you out of this verse I quoted a moment ago. Train up a child in the way you should go. The word train in the original language is speaking of helping them to go in a direction that is conformed to their temperament and their gifts. Train up the child in the way you should go. You're actually provoking them according to their nature and direction. Not so much nature, but their characteristics. In other words, you have some children are, I will say, like my son Dave. My son Dave, very athletic as a little boy into adulthood, very athletic, loves sports and all of that. My son Joseph, no creative, a thinker, you know, somebody likes to read, you know, so your children have different personalities. So I learned a long time ago that I wasn't going to try and form Joseph into an athlete. I wanted him to go in the way his own temperament was directing him. That's a work of the Holy Spirit. So I was talking one time to a man who had a problem with his son because his son was a little boy and he liked to use chalk and he would, he was always getting, you know, blue chalk, yellow chalk, green chalk and, and red chalk. And he was, he's always chalk, chalk and, and the father was one of these guys who wanted his son to be an athlete. And I still remember, I was standing there and he's looking at his kid with disgust and his kid was only four. He had little guys just playing there and he goes, he doesn't, and he tells me this. He goes, he doesn't, he doesn't like sports. And I looked at him. I looked at this guy and I said, the world needs artists. The world needs poets. The world needs creativity too. Not just somebody who can hit a ball or make a touchdown, catch a pass. The world needs artists, songwriters. We need it. Why would you quench him to try and make him in what you want him to be when he doesn't want to be that? Discover your child, watch him, see the things that they like and encourage them in that way, but make sure it's wrapped up in the things of God so that the things that are doing are pleasing to him. That's what you do. That's how you do it. You see, when it says train up a child and the way it should go, during the time of the writing, the midwives would actually apply date honey to the lips of brand new newborn infants. They would take date honey, the midwife would do it, and they would put honey on the lips of the newborn, provoking to them the sucking reflex. And so that's the training up. It's provoke them. It's do that which helps them to do that, which is going to be pleasing to the Lord. In the ancient days, the mother would minister to the infant while she was nursing. That mother would be praying and singing and she would quote scripture to the baby as she was doing that. But when the child was able to speak, the father took over the training. The father taught them prayers and scripture and basic doctrine. And what that did is it produced a worldview that that child would view the world through. It was through scripture. It was through the memorization of the Bible. They memorized the first five books of the Bible. And the father would do that with the child in Proverbs 4 11 through 13. It says, I have taught you in the way of wisdom, I have led you in right paths. When you walk, your steps will not be hindered. When you run, you will not stumble. Take firm hold of instruction. Do not let go. Keep her for she is your life. Well, what can we do? How can we encourage our kids, those of us who are parents? Deuteronomy chapter 6 verse 4 through 9 says it like this. Hero is real, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strike. These words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, shall talk of them when you sit in your house. When you walk by the way, when you lie down, when you rise up, you shall bind them as a sign on your hand. They shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and upon your gates. Hero Israel, the Lord our God is one and love them with all of your heart. How can I raise my child to know the Lord? Well, one takes me, a parent, it begins with me having a vibrant saving faith in our, our unique God. Moses wrote, he said, the Lord your God is one, unlike the pagans who had various gods, he is the God of the universe. Moses is making it clear he is our God. He is our savior. So our children must see that we as parents are devoted to the one who saved us. Be careful not to fall into the trap of outward religion. Don't just go to church on Sunday or whatever and say, yeah, that's enough. It isn't enough. Develop a vibrant faith. You can't give your children a faith that you don't have yourself. And so we fathers are to bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Again, that's by explanation as well as example. We speak to them, but we also live before them. Now obviously when the father isn't, won't or can't, mama should. Now this isn't to be neglected. This isn't to be put off. We don't have that much time. Remember that Satan is never ceasing in his attempts to destroy. He is constantly on the prowl. And if we neglect pouring into our children, somebody ultimately pour in something we don't want, they're already inclined towards sin. They naturally are leaning away from God. So training and encouragement continues throughout their lifetime. As they grow older, we adapt to their age and maturity. When they're small, it's a little easier to tell them, don't do this or don't go there. It's easier. When they're older, it's more difficult. So what we need to do is we need to encourage them and we need to let them know how much this matters to us. You see, if we're going to have, if they're going to know the Lord, they need to see a faith in us. But also in verse five, he said, you shall love the Lord your God with all your, your, your heart, soul, and might. So they need to know the reason we are the way that we are. They need to know that we love God. We need to establish proper priorities for our own lives. And then we live them openly. He speaks about loving God with our heart, which speaks of life priorities. He speaks of loving God with our soul, which speaks of spiritual hunger. He speaks of loving God with our might, which speaks of physical labor. It's all centered on pleasing God. And that's obvious how we work. We are to represent Jesus to our kids. It produces a home where God is taken seriously and where faith is real. And we have to communicate a personal faith, not just a conceptual belief. And so the question you might want to ask yourself this, if you're a father or a mother, if you're a parent, if I were to sit down with your kid and I would say to them, tell me what the most important thing in your dad's life is. Or to the mama. What is the most important thing in your mama's life? Tell me, ask yourself, what would your kid say? How would they respond? What would they say? My dad was the most important thing in my dad's life? He loves his cars. You know, he, he, he loves shooting. He loves he loves sports. I knew a guy when I, again, I used to play a lot of, a lot of softball and on and he was in a church. I was assistant pastor in it and he was on the same softball team. My first church ministry was, was in athletics. I, I was the chaplain and I played on the team and all of that. And I got to know this guy in that way. And I was sitting with his wife one day at one of the games before the game started, Marie and I, and I was sitting there and she looks at me and she says, you, you know, my husband plays on three softball teams a week. She says, if I don't come to his games, I will never see him. She tells me that. If I don't come to the games, I never see him. And I'm looking at her and I'm thinking, really, she wasn't asking for advice. She was just telling me something. So I just, oh, two or three years later, this church was already, we were already holding services and I still remember this guy walking up to me. Some guy walks up to me and he walks up the aisle and I'm standing and he says to me, do you remember me? And I'm looking at him. And as I look at him, we used to play softball together. He goes, yeah, I said, you played on the team. And he goes, yeah, my wife left me. My wife left me. I said, really? I already knew why she never was with him. See, so if I asked your kid, what is it that my dad loves the most? What is he going to say? What is she going to say? What does my dad love the most? If I ask him, what is your mama like the most? What are they going to say? Oh, you know, she likes shopping or she likes, what's she going to say? You need, and I'm telling you, believe it or not, maybe some value this, maybe some won't. I'm telling you this, make it your chief aim that they will say, what does my dad love? My dad loves the Lord. What does my mama love? My mama loves Jesus. That matters. Even when your kid says, Matt, what's wrong with you? You have to always go, how come you, and they get all whiny and this and that. You know what? When they get older, they will not depart. When they get older, you can, I'm telling you, my kids wandered off. And it was heartbreaking. You know, I say this with permission. I wasn't going to say this, but I say this with permission. My son, David, years ago now, years ago now, came to me and said, dad, my girlfriend's pregnant. They weren't married. Broke our hearts. Broke our hearts. Why wouldn't it break our hearts? Broke our hearts. I'm one of these guys who wears my heart on my sleeve. Anybody who goes to this church knows that. I don't keep secrets. This is me. This is what happened. This is it. You're going to hear it anyway. Let me tell you myself because gossip just churches are known for it. They really are. It's a sin, but they're known for it. They're known for it. And so I dealt with it. Let my church family know some of you were there. I know some of you were there. I see you. You were there. You know, the tears and the pain and the hurt. And a lot of people left our church. A lot of people. One man in particular used to call me dad. He had knocked up his girlfriend, but it was okay for him. But my son couldn't sin because, you know, my son's perfect because he got my perfection, right? And I took a lot. Marie and I took a lot. We took a lot of barrels. Hundreds left. He's a bad pastor. Gossip flew about me, but I held fast. Why? Because I believe in the grace of God. And the last baptism we have, the last baptism we had, I baptized that baby. I baptized my little girl. She's following the Lord. Grace wins. No, I'm not giving permission for sin. No, sin is so horrible. Jesus died to set us free from it. But God's grace is greater than any sin. And I believe that. I believe that. And so hold on. It's not over. I've said it before. Our lives are like books. And sometimes we have chapters that are romance and sometimes are tragedy. Sometimes it's comedy. It's just a sub book, but the last chapter has yet to come. So I wait for the last chapter because it ends and they all live happily ever after with the Lord Jesus Christ. That's how your book is going to end. See? So I look to the end and it doesn't mean it's not hard. Put your life into serving God and encouraging them. Again, remember, your life is the Bible to them. My son, Joseph, I've said this before. My son, Joseph, was about four years old and we lived in the home we were living in at that time. I had gone into the backyard and I had torn up all the grass and and was receding and and it had rained. And when it rained, the backyard was muddy. And so I went into the backyard just to see if there's any any grass growing and there wasn't. But anyway, as I went in there, I heard the door that we had a wooden screen door and I heard it slam. And and I was still looking in another direction, but I could hear these grunts. What's going on? And I turned around and my Joseph was these exaggerated strides, real long strides for a four year old. And I'm looking at and I said, son, what are you doing? And he goes, I'm walking in your footsteps. And I've never forgotten that. He's walking in my footsteps and that you know how the Lord will seek in a personal way to you sometimes. I still remember the impression of my heart. The spirit of the Lord spoke to my heart in a simple way. Be careful where you go. He's following you. Be careful how you live. He's following you because it's not just what I say. It's what I'm doing. And he said it. And I've always remembered that. And so we give to them all that we can. And then finally, one, well, actually two more things. I'll say finally, so you think it's over almost. I've been saying this, be committed to evangelization that takes time, sacrifice, and training. Kids who live with their parents spend less than 30 minutes per week in meaningful conversation with their mothers and 15 minutes with their dads. And so display your faith. I mentioned this date them, take them out for breakfast or lunch, laugh with them, share with them. Sometimes you're even going to cry with them. Take walks, pray, hug them, love them, give them devotions, have conversations. That gives you opportunity to bring scripture to life. I remember my son, David, when he was maybe seven years old, he and I were up in the mountains and and I looked up into the sky and you can see the beautiful stars. And I said, son, what are those? And he said, those are stars, dad. He was about seven. I said, really, how did they get there? He says, I really don't know, dad. How did he get there? I said, the God you worship, the God I serve. Put those stars exactly where they're at, son, the God you worship is the creator of all things. And so we take opportunities when given to share with them about the mighty God that we serve. And then finally, the scripture says in chapter six, verse nine of Deuteronomy, write God's word on the doorpost and on your gates. Make your house a sanctuary. Would you let a murderer, a rapist, a profane or belligerent, violent person into your home to invade? Be careful what you let in through the screen, through TV and radio, through the printed page. Be careful who you let into your home to influence your children. Make your home into a church. For those kids know this is a place this family worships God. And finally, I'm just going to read something to you. I had debated whether I would or not. I put it in my notes. But this is something that I've never forgotten. It impacted me many years ago. It's an old song. Some of you are familiar with it. Most probably aren't. It's an old song. It's called Cats in the Cradle. And so I heard this many years ago and it hit me. And so I'll just share it with you. These are the words. My child arrived just the other day. He came to the world in the usual way, but there were planes to catch and bills to pay. He learned to walk while I was away and he was talking before I knew it. And as he grew, he'd say, I'm going to be like you, dad. You know, I'm going to be like you. The cats in the cradle, the silver spoon, little boy blue in the man in the moon. When you're coming home, dad, I don't know when, but we'll get together then. You know, we'll have a good time then. My son turned 10 just the other day. He said, thanks for the ball, dad. Come on, let's play. Can you teach me to throw? I said, not today. I got a lot to do. He said, that's okay. And he walked away, but his smile never dimmed and said, I'm going to be like him. Yeah. You know, I'm going to be like him. The cats in the cradle, the silver spoon, little boy blue, the man in the moon. When you're coming home, dad. I don't know when, but we'll get together then. You know, we'll have a good time then. Well, he came from college just the other day. So much like a man I just had to say, son, I'm proud of you. Can you sit for a while? He should just had him then said with a smile, what I'd really liked dad is to borrow the car keys. I'll see you later. Can I have them please? Cats in the cradle, the silver spoon, little boy blue, the man in the moon. When you're coming home, son. I don't know when, but we'll get together then, dad. You know, we'll have a good time then. Well, I've long since retired. My son moved away. I called him up just the other day. I said, I'd like to see you if you don't mind. He said, I'd love to dad if I could find the time, but you see my new jobs, a hassle. The kids got the flu, but it's sure nice talking to you dad. It's been sure nice talking to you. And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me he'd grown up just like me. My boy was just like me. Cats in the cradle, the silver spoon, little boy blue, the man in the moon. When you're coming home, son, I don't know when, but we'll get together then, dad. We're going to have a good time then. What you are, father, is what your son will be. They follow you. Wherever you go, they will go. Whatever you do, they will do. You are their hero. You really are. My dad was Superman. He told me, and I really did believe he was. I knew Superman was from Krypton. My dad was Mexican. It never made much sense. But if you said it, he was it. And I believed that as a little boy. And then when my father went home to be with Jesus, I walked outside after he had closed his eyes to go with Jesus. My son, David, was there. And I walked into the parking lot and my son, David, looked at me, and I'll never forget. And this is odd because I've said this in other places, and people actually laugh as if it's funny, and I don't understand why they did. Because my son, David, looked at me and said, Superman died. Superman died. If I could be half the man my dad was, half the man, he was a good man. Little boys want to be like their dads. My dad would pay his bills before he fed his family. My dad taught me your name is the most important thing you have, son, treasure it and guard it because it's who you are. My dad taught me things like that. He didn't sit me in lecture. He just would say that, take care of your bills. Son, when you buy something, if you buy a house, that's the most expensive thing you'll ever buy. Your car, that's the second most expensive thing you'll ever buy. Take care of both of them because if you don't, you lose money on them. Take care of the things you own. Don't let them rule you, but take care of them. My dad was that way. Those are the things I brought into adulthood. Those are the things that I gave to my sons and my daughters. Be people of honor. Be people of integrity. Be a person that can be trusted. Do things as unto the Lord. Love God with all of your heart. I'm still not only their pastor, but as a father I'm still the main influence in their lives. And I will be that even to the day that I die. And when my body's in that casket, they'll be looking at the one who made them along with the help of mama and Jesus himself into the people they are. To me that matters. And even as Joshua said, if it seems evil to you to serve the Lord, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve. Whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the river or the gods of the Emirates in whose land you dwell, but as for me in my house, we will serve the Lord.