 Colgate dental cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth and help stop tooth decay and luster cream shampoo For soft glamorous carousel hair bring you our miss Brooks starring Eve Arden It's time once again for another comedy episode of our miss Brooks written by Al Lewis Well by last week the final examinations were all completed and our miss Brooks who teaches English at Madison High School Velt that she was entitled to celebrate Accordingly, I granted mr. Boynton the privilege of spending all Thursday afternoon and evening with me In fact, I granted him the privilege about 20 minutes before he asked me Friday morning at breakfast my landlady inquired about the preceding night's revelry What did you do Connie? Where did mr. Boynton take you? He took me to the zoo, Mrs. Davis. Oh My goodness Connie, I know mr. Boynton is conservative But I thought he'd at least take you to some place where there's a little gaiety. Oh, the zoo wasn't so bad They get a pretty nice crowd If you like orangutans Mr. Boynton doesn't spend much does he Connie? He hasn't got much Mrs. Davis But there's one thing about my dates with him. I get home in time to get plenty of sleep Last night. It was only 10 o'clock when we said goodnight. You didn't just say goodnight. Did you certainly not Mrs? Davis we shook hands first Oh, it was so romantic standing there in the moonlight with our fingers locked in the mad embrace It doesn't sound very romantic to me. Oh, it was mr. Boynton got so carried away. He almost took off one of his gloves Well, I certainly wouldn't call this a whirlwind courtship with you frankly Mrs. Davis I've felt a stronger wind coming out of a flat bottle of club soda Mr. Boynton was in a very good mood yesterday. It seems he's in line for a professorship at state university Really? Yes as a matter of fact, the dean is going to interview him after school today It'll mean a lot to mr. Boynton if he gets the position more money prestige Why he'll even be able to settle down and get married to some nice girl What nice girl? What's the difference as long as she's a refined wholesome english teacher who lives with mrs. Davis Well, I think you and mr. Boynton should have been married long ago Why don't you give him a hint once in a while why I'm surprised at you mrs. Davis You ought to know I'm not that sort of a person I was thinking of the poor souls who resort to trickery to get their men just last evening When Connie right after I steered mr. Boynton into a chinese restaurant ordered a bowl of rice and slipped the waiter a quarter to throw it at us I know you're joking Connie, but believe me a little mental suggestion wouldn't hurt That's walter dennan. I better get my hat and coat be right with you walter Will you get that phone please mrs. Davis? I can't seem to find my hat certainly dear Hello, hello, miss brooks. This is mr. Boynton. Oh, thanks just the same dear, but this is mrs. Davis Connie is rushing to get out of the house, but I'll call her if you don't disturb mrs. Davis I just wanted to tell her about the call I received from dean faraday of state you She's told me something about your expectations, mr. Boynton, and I'm certainly thrilled over the news We both are Oh, thank you. So am I I'd do anything to get that position mrs. Davis as a matter of fact I I had to resort to a bit of deception when I spoke to the dean a few minutes ago deception Well, I live alone as you know and the dean made it quite clear to me that the board favors family men on their faculty So I uh, I had to tell a little fib. What did you say mr. Boynton? Well, I told him I am a family man I said I lived with mrs. Boynton mrs. Boynton. Yes, my mother Of course mom actually lives upstate with dad, but well, I figured a little white lie like that couldn't do much harm Oh, of course it can't mr. Boynton I'll explain it all to Connie and she'll see you at school later on. Oh fine mrs. Davis. Goodbye. Goodbye Be right with you walter. Well mrs. Davis. I'm off before you go Connie that was mr. Boynton on the phone just now He said he had to play a little trick on the dean when he called because the dean prefers Family men to bachelors. What kind of a trick mr. Boynton told him he lives with mrs. Boynton mrs. Boynton, but how could he say? coming If I don't get down to walter's car one of them will blow a gasket So you see walter mr. Boynton may soon be going to state university to teach gosh miss brooks all the way to state you Oh, that's over 20 blocks from madison. Hi Well, I don't think they'd move it any closer walter besides. He hasn't got the professorship yet Although from what mrs. Davis said he's certainly anxious to get it He even told the dean he was a family man said he lives with mrs. Boynton His wife naturally boy if mr. Boynton told anybody he's married. He must really want that job According to my dad faking your marital status is a pretty dangerous thing to do though He got into a jam once just by saying he was single. Oh, he said it to my mother Yeah, four weeks later they were married serves him right Yeah, he got pretty sore outer for making him fall so head over heels in love when he couldn't really afford marriage You see at that time. He wasn't making any more money than you make as a school teacher unemployed, eh But walter, please don't mention this opportunity mr. Boynton has until the deal is consummated You know, mr. Conklin might make things a bit unpleasant if he heard he was losing one of his best teachers I won't be the word of it to a soul miss brooks Of course, I'll have to tell harry it harry at conklin walter I know you're very fond of her but she's the last person in the world to be entrusted with confidential information She doesn't mean any harm. I'm sure but well her class just named her mistown crier of 1950 Or to put it another way everything you tell harry it goes in one ear and out her father Good morning, miss brooks. Did walter bring you down today? Yes harry it. He did. He's out finding a place to park Oh Well, you know my girlfriend winona sims miss brooks Her folks are back together again this morning But last night they had an awful spat and her dad checked into his club And i've been dying to see walter to tell him the news Well, I don't I already told it to stretch snodgrass and chest to berk and doddy guernsey in case they see walter first But if you happen to see winona, please don't tell her I told you miss brooks. Why not? It's a secret Now that's what I call a secret with a high hooper rating Don't worry harry at my lips are sealed now if you'll excuse me I've got to stop in the lab and see mr. Boynton before my class all right miss brooks see you in a little while come in Oh, it's you miss brooks. I'm glad you stopped by did mrs. Davis say anything about the about you're telling the dean You're living with mrs. Boynton. Yes. I know everything mr. Boynton Oh, not quite everything miss brooks. You see dr. Faraday called me back after I spoke with mrs. Davis And he said he wants to meet mrs. Boynton. He's coming to my apartment after school today Now I'm really in a spot not if you carry your original deception a step farther and produce mrs. Boynton for the dean producer I am now applying for the job You're not serious miss brooks about you. I mean, uh I know how much this new position means to you mr. Boynton, and I'd like to help you out Besides what's wrong with me being mrs. Boynton you but that's ridiculous Thanks a million What's ridiculous about it? Well, you you don't look the part dr. Faraday would expect to meet a much more uh Well mature woman someone not only older in years, but more settled I'll settle I'll settle No, no, thanks just the same but uh, wait a minute Maybe makeup would do the trick makeup powder and stuff Sure a few streaks of white near hair make you look real stately and and then I could tell the dean You're considerably older than you look. Well, let's not rush into senility. Mr. Boynton Well, we can discuss the details after school fine and miss brooks I'd like to say that I think it's wonderful of you to get in there and pitch for me this way I've been pitching for a long time mr. Boynton. You just haven't been catching I'd better get over to my room now. Goodbye mr. Boynton Mrs. Boynton Mrs. Boynton Shall I uh, shall I walk you over to your class? Don't bother. I'll hop the first cloud heading east Toodle sorry, mr. Brooks Harriet. I just happened to be near this door tying my shoelace I see is that how you caught your ear lobe in the keyhole? Don't worry mr. Brooks all I overheard was Harriet I don't like the tone of your What did you hear it's a secret mr. Brooks see you in class. Oh great I thought I heard you talking mr. Brooks or was there someone out here with you only the house detective That's what delayed me. Oh, I'm glad I wanted to catch you. Oh, well here. I am catch But I just thought of something mr. Brooks if you're to convince the dean that you're mrs. Boynton We'd better get your wedding ring now I'll just measure your finger with this piece of string and get over to minors jewelry store after school Oh, don't spend too much on a ring mr. Boynton after all mine is a pretty good friend of mine I'm sure he'll lend me the ring for just one day You won't back out will you mr. Brooks? Of course not. I'll play mrs. Boynton to the hill Even though it will be rather a grueling job. What do you mean grueling? It's only for one day That's what I mean. I love the position, but the hours are so short I Look starring eve arden will continue in just a moment, but first here is verne smith No other dentifers offers proof of such results proof that colgate dental cream helps stop tooth decay before it starts Two years research at leading universities using colgate dental cream Hundreds of case histories makes this the most conclusive proof in all dentifers history on tooth decay Conclusive proof that when teeth are brushed with colgate right after eating Colgate dental cream helps stop tooth decay before it starts Yes, the toothpaste you use to clean your breath while you clean your teeth Now offers a safe proved way to reduce tooth decay Modern science shows decay is caused by mouth acids, which are at their worst right after eating Brushing teeth with colgates as directed helps remove acids before they harm enamel Colgate dental cream has been proved to contain all the necessary ingredients Including an exclusive patented ingredient for effective daily dental care get colgate dental cream today Big economy size only 59 cents always use colgate dental cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth And help stop tooth decay before it starts remember no other dentifers offers proof of such results Well, my spirits were considerably buoyed up during the morning classes by the thought that I was to be mrs. Boynton that very afternoon I refused to dwell on the fact that by midnight I'd feel like queen for a day And I just finished my lunch when Harriet conklin joined me in the cafeteria and told me her father wanted to see me It was obvious when I got to the principal's office that mr. Conklin had received some kind of a report on my conversation in mr. Boynton's lab Because he was much too jovial Ah, mrs. Brooks sit down sit down. Thanks. Thanks Well, what's new with you? How's every little thing just dandy in a tiny sort of way? Well, it seems to me that there's something in the air and don't you agree It is getting a bit nippy out might even freeze up tonight. The radio advised the citrus growers to smudge I didn't ask you in here for a frost warning mrs. Brooks I I see something in your face that's never been there before your your eyes are glowing your cheeks are flush Tell me what's the cause of it? They had chili con carne in the cafeteria Now if you'll excuse me, sir, I better Well, there's the start of the next period. I'd better be running along now very well, mrs. Brooks And thank you for a most delightfully cryptic few moments Sorry, mrs. Brooks. Didn't you get that shoe tied yet? Never mind Harriet. I'll see you in class later on. Okay, mrs. Brooks Well daddy did mrs. Brooks let the cat out of the bag. She didn't let an undenourished mouse out of the bag But I'd swear there's something up. Well, of course there is I told you we called her mrs. Boynton this morning And I also heard and say they were meeting a doctor something or other in his apartment this afternoon A doctor, eh? Must be a minister. They're getting married this afternoon Well, it's been some time coming But this has been a very modest and sensible courtship between these two teachers Kindness consideration and courtesy have all played their part And now at long last she's nailed him Isn't it wonderful and just think daddy now that she's getting married mrs. Brooks can do what she always said she'd do Quit her job and raise a family Ah, yes motherhood What greater boon to the american home than the pitter-patter of little QUIT HER JOB She can't do this to me Why do you realize how difficult it is to secure a competent teacher in the middle of a school year? We're sure daddy, but there's nothing anybody can do about it after all you can't interfere with dan cupid I can't Well, if dan cupid thinks he's going to rob me of an english teacher. I'll beat the bear little brute until he drops his quiver So if you'll go on ahead to my apartment mrs. Brooks, I'll pick up the wedding ring at minors store You see dr. Faraday said he'd meet me right after school. I wouldn't want him to wait out in the hall All right, mr. Boynton, but what do I do with my hands until you come back and slip me the ring Well, uh, couldn't you sort of fold them? They'll be folded all right. I'll be praying I'm sure of the work miss Brooks. Just put plenty of powder in your hair and assume a dignified attitude Now we'd better be going. All right. I'll do it. Mr. Boynton. Why mrs. Boynton has to be an octogenarian I'll never know. Oh, well see you in a little while. Mr. Boynton. Very well, miss Brooks. Bye. Goodbye That's a relief even if I am a few minutes late at least my mother will be there to greet dr. Faraday Oh, here it comes connie be right there I wish I knew more about the layout of this apartment the front door must be one of these Come in doctor. We've been oh, it's a closet Welcome dr. Faraday to our little nest. Thank you my dear you of course would be mrs. Boynton. I sure would That is I am mrs. Boynton May I help you off with your coat sir? Thank you Hell is certainly is a lovely apartment you folks have here now. How long have you been living in it about three years Now I'll just hang up your coat and we can have a nice chat until Philip comes home He'll just be a few minutes Forgive my mentioning it mrs. Boynton, but you're hanging my coat in the bathroom Sorry Since we had the apartment done over I get rather confused Here we are This is the kitchen Isn't it cute While I'm here suppose I make some lemonade for us. Yeah, but what about my coat better take it with you this apartment's pretty draughty Why don't you just make yourself comfortable in the living room if you run across it I'll get some lemons out of the pantry dr. Faraday Very well mrs. Boynton. I'll go into the living room Somebody at the front door Shall I answer it? Shall I answer it? I guess mother Boynton is busy Well, I locked myself out Let's postpone the lemonade shall we Why don't we just sit in the living room and have a little talk you lead and I shall follow You'll take this rocker. I presume I wouldn't be without it You sit here on the sofa doctor Fine You know mrs. Boynton when I first made known my need for a biology professor at state you philip boynton was most Highly recommended by our board of directors. You can be very proud of him indeed. Oh, I am I've been proud of philip ever since the day we met The day you met I'll never forget it. It was on a bus. He got up and gave me his seat He gave you his he was getting off at the next block anyway You see he was going to visit his father who happened to be in the hospital at the time His father was in the hospital I know things were different in those days, but I don't recall them as being that different The next time I saw philip was two weeks later. He'd just been made a lieutenant in the air corps He looked so cute, of course some of the enlisted men said he wasn't dry behind the ears yet They might have had something there Mrs. Boynton, I'm happy to see you've got such a keen sense of humor in times like these Well, hello, dr. Faraday. Oh, hello boynton philip darling. Let me take your hat. No. No, don't you move dear? Just stay right there on your rocker Oh such devotion You know I like that in a man boy I like the way you look at her. Oh, she's still my sweetheart. She's a fine woman She's the salt of the earth the cream of the crowd. She's all woollen a yard wide only from sir You gentlemen will excuse me. I'll go fix them lemonade. Certainly dear. That'll be very nice Hey, mr. Boynton your mother and I've been getting along famously. Oh, she's a great old gal Yes, indeed It's sit down my boy I'd like to ask you a few questions before I make my final recommendation for your appointment to state you Now, for instance, do you have any plans for leaving your present state of bachelorhood? Well, not immediately sir. You know how it is with school teachers They mostly meet other school teachers and well, we just can't afford each other But someday when I've advanced a bit in salary, I do hope to get married Well, sounds like you've already selected a candidate. Tell me about a son. Well, we met on a bus A Bus? Yes, sir. I got up and gave her my seat. I was getting off at the next block anyway You see my father was in the hospital at the time You know, this sounds very familiar Here we are fresh lemonade coming up one for you doctor and here's your glass fillet Oh, thank you. Nobody makes better lemonade than you do Yeah, it is good. You know, mrs. Boynton, I simply can't get over your youthful appearance. Thank you, sir I uh, I'm not being presumptuous. I trust but would you mind telling me how old you were when philip came into the world? Well, as a matter of fact, he came in before I did It's too sweet. Would you please come into the kitchen with me for a moment? Surely, but please excuse us, dr. Faraday We'll be right back. Yeah, of course Miss Brooks, this is no time for kidding. You've got to act much older in front of the dean 10 or 20 years older But mr. Boynton that would make me old enough to be your mother. Of course. He thinks you are my mother Now now here's the ring. How does that go again? I thought I was supposed to be mrs. Boynton your wife my wife. That's ridiculous I explained it all to mrs. Davis on the phone. I don't care what you explained My father didn't raise his daughter to be your mother Miss Brooks, you wouldn't want to wreck my chances for a professorship now, would you? No, mr. Boynton, I wouldn't but I'm going to make as hasty and gracious an exit as I possibly can Oh dr. Faraday, I just remembered a rather pressing engagement. Will you excuse me? Oh, certainly my dear I hope we'll meet soon again. Thank you. Goodbye philip. Goodbye Oh come now. Don't be embarrassed in front of me. Go ahead kiss her. Goodbye. No, that won't be necessary You heard what the man said Come on over here and kiss your dear old everloving mammy this minute Wait a minute ma. Shucks. I I really shouldn't. Well, gee ma, I don't want to Come here, baby Who's in the men's department? Goodbye mrs. Boynton and may I say it's been very pleasant. Very pleasant indeed. You're not just rattling your sheepskin dean Brooks returns in just a moment, but first dream girl dream girl beautiful luster cream Tonight yes tonight show him how much lovelier your hair can look after a luster cream shampoo Luster cream world's finest shampoo No other shampoo in the world gives k. Dumas magic blend of secret ingredients plus gentle aniline Not a soap not a liquid luster cream shampoo leaves hair three ways lovelier Fragrantly clean free of loose dandruff listening with sheen soft manageable Even in hardest water luster cream lathers instantly no special rinse needed after a luster cream shampoo So gentle luster cream is wonderful even for children's hair Tonight yes tonight try luster cream shampoo dream girl Beautiful luster cream girl You owe your crowning glory to A luster cream shampoo And now once again here is our miss brooks Well, I started to leave mr. Boynton's apartment, but as I opened the door Hello, miss brook mr. Conklin. What have you done to yourself? You look so much older I've aged 10 years since I opened this door Oh, come on. Let's join the others. I hope I'm not too late. Oh, but mr. Conklin. Good afternoon, mr. Boynton Mr. Conklin aren't you going to introduce me to your guest? Of course, dr. Faraday may I present our principal mr. Conklin How do you do sir? How do you do dr? Well, have you made it official yet? Not quite mr. Conklin We thought maybe we'd try it out for a while first What you mean they're not married mr. Boynton rarely marries his mother Look mr. Conklin if you'll just come into the next room my next room nothing I came here to prevent this thing and I'm glad I'm on time But mr. Conklin surely you wouldn't stand in the way of a teacher's advancement normally no But in this case I'm forced to admit albeit grudgingly that she would be very hard to replace She she I told you you didn't have enough makeup on dairy Miss brooks, please miss brooks I don't know quite what's going on here, but I am convinced of one thing State university will have to look further for a new biology professor, but dr. Faraday. I'm sorry mr. Boynton good day Well, I know I put my foot into something, but I wish someone would tell me what it was Oh, it doesn't matter now mr. Conklin the dean would have discovered the truth sooner or later dean You mean that man was dean faraday of state university certainly, but I must have sounded like a blithering idiot It's been a long time since I heard a better blither I'd better catch up to him and explain then I'll come back here and you can explain. I'll talk to you later on boynton I'm terribly. Sorry mr. Boynton. Oh forget it miss brooks. It was wonderful of you to even try to act as my mother I don't know how to thank you. Oh, that's easy mr. Boynton. Oh climb upon my knees, sunny boy Next week Another armist book show brought to you by luster cream campul The soft glamorous caressible hair And pove eight dental cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth and help stomp tooth decay Our miss brooks starring eve arden is produced by larry burns directed by al lewis with music by wilbur hatch Doctors prove plama life soap can bring you a lovelier complexion in 14 days Yes, 36 leading skin specialists proved in tests on 1285 different women that palm olive soap facials using nothing but palm olive brought new complexion beauty to two women out of three Just wash your face three times daily with palm olive soap each time for 60 seconds Massaging palm olive's beauty lather onto your skin Then rinse so start your palm olive facials today Remember doctors prove palm olive soap can bring you a lovelier complexion in 14 days For mystery liberally sprinkled with laughs listen to mr. And mrs. North The exciting fun packed adventures of an amateur detective and his beautiful wife Tune in Tuesday evening over most of these same stations and be with us again next week at the same time for another comedy episode of Our miss brooks if you enjoyed this program You'll also enjoy teachers pet a feature story on eve arden and our miss brooks In the february issue of liberty magazine now on the newsstands bob laman speaking This is cbs. They columbia broadcasting system