 رسول اللہﷺ was the example what prodded me to say this was we perpetrate crimes in our own homes with our family members in the name of Islam people are abusive to their wives and today we're talking of the husband so please my beloved brothers you will have to absorb what I'm saying and understand it because today we are addressing the loving husband that topic people abuse their wives they سوئر دیں they beat them up and say Islam allows me to do that when it does not and they say well I'm following the sunnah sometimes you know when you see a person looking so religious you won't believe when their wife says this man swears big big swear words huge he comes in the house and he roars and he he beats us up and he shows us a verse of the quran to say hang this verse up I'll show you what Allah's allowed me to do what misinterpretation my beloved brothers and sisters in the name of the one in the name of the one wallahi who was sent as a mercy you are mercy less in your own home have you thought of that in the name of the one who was sent as a mercy you are mercy less in your own home and then you want to claim to be a follower of رسول اللہﷺ how can that be may Allah ﷻ grant us the true acknowledgement of the gift of رسول اللہﷺ to us follow his way عائش رضی اللہ وعنہ says he was never abusive انا سبن مالک رضی اللہ وعنہ who says not only to his wives but never did he say it even to those who worked for him he never ever said uff to anyone why did you do this with us we swear them we shouted them the food is burnt something happens it's a test for us نیمی سبحان اللہ رقم حم جو ہم فوixوں فا خوردہ وی لاす dage و کے وی عجان دھولی crosses سلی اللہﷺ و ری خودовать card Sed a مسئنج Syriaλα و بہت شادنا اِ نیوم سے آپ انتے Prop συ Queensborough ر پ nicest خود ہم اس وحکر ا membriding سف وطاہ ادی قریب گزا پر sóان سکست کیونچو د pluck my exhaust کیونچی ان پر زیاد یہ بالا پر نال ٹ Mini رشال د than انسان Many میں ایک جووں بہت منی column這樣的19these Allez ہمی Jersey کی احد دل جو یہاBabyس ساتھ تو یہاں کلوں کو فکر викاد تھا اور ہے، deployment لائ장님یalyا ہی جو انہوں کو سامنی اوپر و—습니다 flooding جو ای نوران جانبkrä ہوروی کیا اس واست too لوگیں کہ بھر پر مثلہ نہیں ہے۔ تک ہے ، آپ بھی مصیح پر کبیی ہوجاتے ہیں ۔ اللہ کی سے لیکن آپ کی بھر خواہہی سے دروس ہے۔ ایک ہی کیا۔ آپ کی پیسے کیا نہیں چاہتے ہیں ، ولو آپ بھی خواہہہ لیکن آپ کبی to ہی تھیsmس ہونتا ہے۔ ہے۔ سب happily کبی لگتے ہیں۔ آپ کیا کیا ہوتے ہیں؟ الذي اوش سبت کر رہے ہیں تب کے لئے month ایک چیز اور بھر ایک چیز میں سوانتھ لگی ۔ کبی اور اسی طرف دوسرے مجھے آپ پیس ساتھ روز جز tilado지만ً گوان ترادیت ہوں یہ بسیطوک ایک خون معلوم ہے۔ کنی اپنی ساتھ فرمین ، فرمینیوہ ، یہ سیارہ اور صحیح حقیر نہیں بھی ہوتا ہے ، اللہ ایک بارے کا نقل ہے ، آپ ہم آپ سے خود لگا ہوں کو بہت القرآن کر سکتے ہیں آپ کا عاد ہے ، تمام جہاں آپ دور چاہتے ہیں ، یہ امانی سائنا پردار کو اس گاہی دیتے ہیں۔ کیا آپ کو دوتوں کے ساتھ لئے ، اجاری اجتماعہ ہوتا ہے ، مجھای بارے ہوتا ہے۔ تم داخل تک تک مجھے مجھے بھائی دنیہ ہے۔ ایک سنوہ ایک سنوہ کسی۔ ان کے سنانی ہوتے ہیں کہ آپ کی اتنے بھائی میں برازتا ہے۔ کن آپ یہ سبحان اللہ کیا جاتا ہے؟ جنہوں میں جانتے ہیں کہ آپ میں پر برازتا ہے جب آپ اللہ سبحانہ ہو جاتا ہے اگر وہ بی بی گن ہے۔ اس کے ساتھ بھی ہوتا ہے۔ کیوں کہ یہ مضید ہوتا ہے۔ یہ نہیں ہوتا ہے۔ لیکن اپنے بھائیوں اور باتتے ہیں کہ یہ حق ہے ، You would be hurt, how dare you do this I gave you my daughter all I want from you is to respect her. That's it, You don't abuse your spouse not at all the Prophet piece upon him says it Clearly that the best from amongst you those who are best to your family members starting with your wife are you ready for that you want to follow Mohammed سãoہ سلام you want to Celebrate the moly will start off by being the best to your wife start off by being the best To whom to your family members you have celebrated the life of the rassulullah کیا سبحانہ لیے ، اس نے اسی لیے ہوئی۔ اس نے خیاروکم ، خیاروکم ، احاسنите ، اخلاقAN.最 اکہ انھیں ایسا آپ کے جیسے ہے کہ جو ہے۔ آپ کتب حاجت ہے۔ میں ایک میکرکت میکرکت حاجت ہو ہوں ، بہت جیسے ہے کہ ہمیں ایک انھیں آپ کے جیسے چیزوں کے جیسے ہے ، آپ کا محاورت ہے کیا onun ا payroll جس کا مع Johnny ہی سی ایک جورá کرنے کے لئے س Propheh شاملہ ہو ہونور کیا اوانئ will reconcile اوانا خدیجہ بنت خویلید رضی اللہ و عنہ آئیر ، اس کے اپنیان کو کسی اپنیان سکتا ہے۔ کیا آپ اپنیان ہے؟ کیا آپ کیا آپ یہ تاکہ ہے؟ کسی ہمارے ہی جس کو اپنے ویفوں کو پہلے سبحان اللہ کو بات کریں؟ کسی ہمارے ہمارے ہمارے ہمارے اپنے انسٹرکشن کو دیشاوٹ کریں۔ دیکھو۔ 10 اکلوک۔ آپ یہاں پر پر ہے۔ پر سمائل کو دیکھو۔ پر سمائل کو بات کریں۔ بجانت ہے جب ان کا خبنہ اپنے حق Kerry جما کہ آپ کو مکال ہے کہ آپ کا کم اپنے ٹمپل ٹیپل کی بجانت ہے سبحانہ اللہ میں اپنے حق کو اپنی بہت منجز کریں جس میں اللہ سبحانہ و تعالى ر다고 براہ رہ جاتا ہے حق میں سب سے کسی طرح میں شاہر ماربا ہوں ، نلéہ صدر سلم نے وضع نہیں ا پر ان کی جانتے ہیں ، جانتے ہیں ، ان کی جانتے ہیں ماربا، آپ پر آپ سے اپنے ماربا سیدہ ہے سیدہ میں کوئی برائی سلالہ سیلہم نے جانتا ہے جو سیدہ ہے جو ہمارے سے اس کے سنی طرح پر سیدہ پر سیلہم نے not only raising hand don't abuse don't say hurtful words سیدہ نے اس نے اس نے افریلا سے لا کیا آپ اس سے نہیں کیا جاتا ہے When they did not do something he didn't even do that to his own servants let alone his ایسا جو کہا کہ اپنے جو ایسی قضاءہ ہے جب ایسا عائش رض کے لئے سے کوئی رکھتا ہے کہ وہ اپس کوئی ح nights ب Nous میکن سبھا گا اور اس سے اس وقت جو اس وقت کتا ہے ہمٹو ہے ایک بارے میں اس کے بارے میں بہنگ城 Ellie قرار کیا ہوا تو جو اپنے جو اپنے موتے ہے اپنہ جانتے ہیں تو اپنے موتوں کو جانتے ہیں جانتے ہیں تو آپ کے بارے میں big بات کو جاتا ہے تو آپ کے بارے میں بہتے ہے already he said he used to the fact that she said he used to shows that it was habitual it was not just a one of thing we make a big deal out of things may Allah subhanahu و تعالیٰ grant us goodness when we do a small thing it's a big issue you know what learn to help at home learn to assist at home and I know my beloved sisters let's not use that as an excuse ، مجھے جالاتا ہے ، جانتا ہوئی؟ جو لکھتے ہیں ، یہ ہے۔ you do all the work. آپ یہ بہت سے کوئی کامل ہے ، کیونکہ یہ مستوح ہے ، یہ ایک بہت ہے ، آپ ضروری ہے ، آپ آپ پر اندتیش کرنا چاہتے ہیں ، آپ پڑھیں ، حیہ رہا ہوا ، اس بہت بہت چاہتا ہے ، اس کاہولے ایک انساہر کرہے جائیں۔ اس میں بہت ہے۔ بہت پر اس بہت چاہتا ہے۔ ذہبہ سبحانہ ہوں ، ایک بہت بہت کسہ بہت سنگ کو درجہ اللہ تعالیٰ حالیٰ حالیٰ was such a beautiful person that he used to dress up beautifully and apply perfume when he used to go home to his family how many of us we want our women to look nice but you look like a tramp اللہ تعالیٰ اکبر and then we come and complain she never dresses up for me well do you dress up for her it's a sunna you want to follow the prophet peace be upon him you want to know what kind of a husband he was he used to smell so good and look so good سبحان اللہ he used to say such good words he used to joke with his family the environment in the home was loving it was kind ours cat and mouse cat and mouse سبحان اللہ we enter and the whole environment is messed in the house the prophet ڈسلیم used to joke at times he used to narrate stories his family down and talk to them tell them stories about this and about that like the حدیث of ڈسلیم a nice story the prophet ڈسلیم speaks about things he used to say things we don't have time for the family you get home it's either it used to be a way back about newspapers then it became the tv now it is the phone سبحان اللہ you in you at home and you on the phone what are you doing on the phone سبحان اللہ they are real life people right in front of you go and follow the سنہ you claim to be a muslim well you are very far from islam you only have a small portion of islam the prophet ڈسلیم used to spend time speaking to his family many of the women if they heard an islamic lecture they will go home and narrate it and relate it i know they might remember only the portions that actually you know relevant to them but in actual fact men complain sheikh you always talk about how men should be you don't ever talk about how women should be so i asked them how many lectures of mine have you heard and they say well by the way i don't really listen to you so then how can you tell me how can you tell me what i've done and what i haven't done when you don't listen good news to them they listen so they can use it as ammunition against you right ڈسلیم ڈسلیم used to take time to say what he wanted to tell them things i was saying the women narrate the stories the men don't you can have heard a lovely lecture but when you go back the only thing you remember is you've got to be an obedient wife that's what the imam said obedient wife that's the only thing on your tongues and another thing is you've got to accept a second wife it's a topic that people why do you want to start speaking about things is that the only sunnah you know on earth when you don't even have the time to correct your tongue when you're upset and you control your temper with a normal average human being you will be getting a great reward wallahi when it's your family you earn jannah you earn jannah when it is your family you earn jannah تل فردوس مئے اللہ سبحانہ و تعالیٰ گرانٹس blessings so the prophet ﷺ used to dress up for who for his family how many of you and i challenge you it's a friday we're talking of the best husband the most the most blessed of all creation the highest in rank of all i tell you one thing we need to follow him let's not just pay lip service to it it's not just about lip service my beloved brothers and sisters dress up you go home take pride in your hair take pride in your clothing what you look like you what you smell like you come home they should look at you and feel attracted come on the prophet ﷺ was intimate with his spouses and he fulfilled that right of his spouses how many of us a month passes we haven't even been intimate with our halal wife she's busy waiting she's dressing up she's trying to attract you so i'm tired you're tired for what there's an ibad that will happen at night some of us might be weak for tahadjud but you can't come and complain that you cannot be intimate with your own spouse you get a similar reward wallahi and i'm not ashamed to speak about it i've spoken about it several times because men are guilty of thinking that women don't have sexual needs this was the prophet ﷺ he tells the companions في بوضعی احدی کم صدقہ remember when you're intimate with your wife and you fulfill her needs and you satisfy her it is an act of charity the Sahaba were rightly so they asked a question oh wow is it really a charity he says well if you put it in haram would you get a sin so they said yes we would get a sin well if you put it in halal in a proper way and you're conscious of the fulfilling of the right you definitely get a reward that's the messenger that's the husband so when you get home and you are intimate with your spouse remember even during the menstrual cycle the prophet ﷺ used to do everything besides intercourse with his own spouse subhanallah he and we cannot get into further details but the prophet ﷺ has explained this to a certain extent we stop at that extent he says everything besides the act itself because you and i know that is prohibited during the menstrual cycle but you can still do a lot subhanallah you can still do a lot many people oh so you're on your cycle all right see you after a week what's going on i'm being honest that's a woman it's not her fault it's from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala treat them with respect that is a husband that is what the prophet ﷺ told us he instructed us he said it with his own mouth his blessed lips and we sit here saying i'm a good muslim sallallahu alaihi wasallam when you hear Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wasallam everyone should be saying sallallahu alaihi wasallam but that's not the only right we say it loudly but our lives are far away from the same sallallahu alaihi wasallam how do you think that's the only right that the prophet ﷺ has is that when you say his name you must say sallallahu alaihi wasallam that is extremely important yes it is blessed yes it is a mask yes you must not miss it but that's only a part of it love your life then you will understand that your life is a whole celebration the whole life is a celebration because you come home your wife is happy you are happy you are focused the problem with us is we're focused on another woman somewhere outside that's what it is we're focused on another person outside subhanallah استغفر الله may Allah protect all of us now when you come home and it's حلال and it's a صدقہ and it's a charity and your wife has been waiting for you and at times she's actually looking forward to it she's protected herself as best as she can and you know what you just say i'm tired tired for what if there was a football match you would have forgotten your tiredness may Allah forgive us if there was a UFC match you would have waited until three in the morning but for your wife up to eleven also you can't wait learn learn my brothers and sisters learn the true sunnah of the prophet ﷺ he was very open in his advice we do not speak about it from the pulpit and that's why i really salute those who came up with such a beautiful topic the prophet ﷺ he was very very kind and he never forgot kindness even when his wife خدیجہ بن تخویلید رضی الله عنہا he used to be very kind to her friends if we were kind to the friends of a spouse sometimes it would be for a contaminated intention may Allah forgive us your wife might become suspicious in her life if you're too kind to her friends what's going on here man that's how bad we've become but with the prophet ﷺ it may not have been and it wasn't a direct continuous contact but he used to send with some of his family members something to them at times in terms of a gift etc and say these were the friends of خدیجہ what a blessed example the prophet ﷺ was just he was fair fair i always say to myself those men who side with their mothers against their wives or their wives against their mothers without looking at who was right and who was wrong they have strayed from the sunnah of the prophet ﷺ he was just it doesn't mean it's your mother so she's right all the time no does it mean it's your wife so she's right all the time you must listen listen to what it is be fair and just get up and solve the problem you are a man come on سبحان اللہ solve the matter in a respectful way beautiful way address your mother with respect my mother i love you you gave birth to me may Allah grant you جنہ i've been taught to be kind to you to respect you but you know the way you're treating my wife is unfortunately wrong you're ready to do that beautiful way sometimes you might need to shift out to protect your wife from the harm of your own mother or your mother from the harm of your wife sometimes you're they won't get along it doesn't mean you just divorce someone because she didn't get along with your mother not at all and then the father comes and says divorce your wife because ibrahim ﷺ issued an instruction and you had to follow it so now you better follow it i'm your father if i don't like it it's over and i always say well he's not ibrahim ﷺ that's the thing he's not a messenger of Allah no father can instruct his son and think that it's revelation from the heavens some of our fathers have marriages that have worked less than our own and they want to instruct us i always would like to say to parents of that nature you couldn't even work your own marriage and you're interfering in your child's marriage may Allah سبحانہ و تعالیٰ قرانت از بلس and happiness in the nutshell that was the justice of the prophet ﷺ let's go to a point of romance the prophet ﷺ used to kiss his wife سبحان اللہ he used to kiss them and the kisses are described i don't have the time for because it's جمع but if i could describe that kiss i don't want to know what might happen to our جمع مئ اللہ سبحانہ و تعالیٰ قرانت از از and the prophet ﷺ used to eat and drink or drink from the same spot that his wife drank from with us if she drank from a cup i can't drink from that cup why i don't know i might just get a cough something else might happen سبحان اللہ he used to find the same place she drank from and drink from it wow this is mentioned by his own wives to say he was so romantic he used to make us blush have you made your wife blush you say yeah she gets red very often she gets red with anger not blushing may Allah forgive us it's a reality so this was the prophet ﷺ you know he used to lean on his spouse leaning sometimes he would lean he would put his leg on on her thigh etc and you know what it's described in the hadith did you know that did you know that so we will do it with someone but that's my wife she should know i love her he would declare his love for his spouse he said Allah has blessed me with the love of خدیجہ that's what he says i love her how many of you tell your wives i love you say it in the presence of your children no problem they will learn how to treat their wives and and their spouses when they grow older the problem with us our children don't know how to live because we haven't lived in their presence we've hidden the good thing sometimes so the children don't know how to be with their spouses if they see you sometimes joking sometimes laughing sometimes sitting and talking smiling etc they will know how to operate in life the prophet ﷺ took the time to play games with his spouses games he would he would literally race with some of his spouses come let's race i run from here to there and let's see who wins subhanallah it may not be racing in our case but it could be it's still a sunnah but it could be any other game i will i'm sure i'll take you out subhanallah let's play this game would you we don't have the time why are we too busy with all other things your spouse comes first family first remember that it's an islamic idea wallahi family first is an islamic idea obviously this is after allah and rasulullah ﷺ that is worship now we're talking of worshiping allah following the sunnah of the prophet ﷺ but when it comes to relationships your family is definitely first if your family comes after your friends you have lost you are far from being a true muslim far your family first and then your friends now what happens is at night the prophet ﷺ taught us that if you don't have anything constructive to do after salatul isha go to bed why wife is waiting for you the problem with us will go to bed but still be on whatsapp until two in the morning right subhanallah the wife tosses and turns this way and that way i hope it's not the other way around mashaAllah but tossing turning and you're not getting the message subhanallah she's trying to touch you and you say wait but where is the islam in you your islam should make you think why am i taught to come to bed here for what i'm supposed to go to bed because i have a spouse why did you get married if you don't want to spend the nights with your wife for what sit with her talk to her play with her be intimate with her fulfill her rights satisfy her go to bed get up for salatul fajr or tahajun and don't be ashamed to have a shower even if the whole house knows what happened at night so what it was halal it's a reality it's an honor it's an honor for someone to shower early in the morning and they are thinking to themselves i wonder what the whole home is going to think but anyway i followed islam this was islam not ashamed your children will grow up doing the same thing but some of us are so ashamed we say hey it's fajr but i don't know Allah opened your eyes for you but i'm going to go for a shower don't worry Allah will forgive me i'll just make it eight o'clock what may Allah forgive us truly امیجن i'm talking about it from a pulpit on the day of jumu'a because we are proud to acknowledge that is islam allahu akbar it's my religion and yours it's my religion and yours subhanallah let's go further the prophet sallallahu wa sallam at times he had his spouse comb his hair and so on he played with their hair as well so much of this romance and intimacy that is described for us it's it's it's actually sad how far we've become the only sunnah that the men actually talk about or a lot of them talk about is is don't pretend like you don't know guys subhanallah second wife it's a sunnah wow second is a sunnah what's sunnah start off with these things correct it is i'm not denying it but i'm saying you haven't even lived as a husband yet and you want to start being a husband for more you've messed up one's life you're going to mess up all the others lives may Allah subhanahu wa t'a'ala grant us a deep understanding so the prophet sallallahu wa sallam used to laugh with them he used to extend help in the home to his spouses he actually the prophet sallallahu wa sallam used to praise his family members his wives he used to praise them especially with others he has spoken about isha رضی اللہ تعالیٰ you know what he says he says the virtue of isha over that of all other women is like tharid over the rest of the food now tharid was a beautiful dish it's a dish of jannah and at the same time it's something that is loved you know so he says she is better than all the other women she is her virtue is very very high would you ever say that about your wife my wife is tops just that tops is enough subhanallah a man thinks sometimes that he's going to be considered small when he praises his wife say the truth you don't have to talk about the negatives behind the backs you're not supposed to talk about negatives regarding normal human beings with your family members you are supposed to cover them you are supposed to protect them you are supposed to be a libas a clothing for them when i wear clothing the gas that i may have due to an operation that i might have had when i was a kid is covered you can't see it the same applies when you are a clothing to your spouse you don't have to go and tell them all the bad you say the good things subhanallah that's my wife what are you talking about she's a lovely lady mashallah i really respect her i really acknowledge she sacrifices so much for me for the children but you know we are weak sometimes we don't know how to reciprocate it may Allah make it easy for us so this is the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam and then the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam used to be happy when they used to get their friends over wow this is a tough one right wife her friends come over and what happens the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam used to actually make way for them they used to be shy with us your friends are coming what's happening how can your friends be here am i not here once in a while you need to have the friends over yes i do agree if they there every day all day subhanallah it will create a bit of a disaster but we're talking of once in a while the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam used to be happy allow her to mix with her friends as well for as long as they are reasonable company sometimes good company but if it's bad company evil then perhaps you want to address the matter with respect don't yell don't scream the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam when he used to look at his wives the eyes that he used to look with used to make them blush subhanallah the way he used to look at them i can just imagine i can only imagine because obviously he was a far higher example imagine a woman like aisha رضی اللہ عنہا بلاشن and the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam just looking at her i wonder what look that was please go home and try it please go home and try it and some of us we've never done it so when you look the first time she might say stop looking at me like a devil may Allah سبحانہ و تعالى grant us forgiveness the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam ہی actually was the best husband he says و أنا خیرکم لئے اہلی ہی and i am the best from amongst all of you to my family i'm the best from amongst all of you to my family do you know what else the prophet sallallahu alaihi has done he used to feed his wife with his own hand at times pick up the muscle and said i'm feeding you we wouldn't even do it if our wives were sick we would say hang on i'll bring a maid i'll get some servant they can do it for you that's what some men would do this is healthy no problem but you want to feed her why my hand in a romantic way you don't go home and say right come here today i'm going to feed you come come here that's not how it works it's romance it has to be built up to that automatically it comes to that you don't demand to be romantic you've got to get it because it's reciprocated automatically you smile at someone they smile back at you you wink at someone you may get two winks back what else i hope it's the right person may Allah سبحانہ و تعالیٰ ڈرانٹس goodness and ease then whenever they wanted something he used to get it for them he used to get it for them and obviously they were not extravagant where they wouldn't have asked right you heard i need the Mercedes i need a this i need a new kitchen i need a new bathroom and toilet i need everything new you heard what the prophet sallallahu alaihi has to do when his wife used to say he used to get it for them that's not it not that bad come on but those simple things they lived in a very simple environment the prophet sallallahu alaihi has to help them he used to get for them he used to get for them what they used to want do the errands and the chores with us a lot of the times the wives are doing it themselves once in a while i know you're at work once in a while say don't worry i'll get the shopping list مے اللہ سبحانہ و تعالیٰ help us he used to he used to want to know about his wife sallallahu alaihi وسلم with us a day passes a week passes we haven't if we're not at home we haven't even phoned to find out how they're doing مے اللہ سبحانہ و تعالیٰ forgive us so these are some of the beautiful points that we have made mention of of the prophet sallallahu alaihi وسلم being the best of husbands do you know that i haven't even covered half of what i had planned to say but i think if we start off with this we will have the best of homes and i'd like to think that Allah سبحانہ و تعالیٰ will bless us in every way i'm just noticing the time i've over shot by about 10 minutes but it's okay i'm sure the wives will forgive us and if they have forgiven us inshallah it's okay 10 minutes more it's a blessing of اللہ سبحانہ و تعالیٰ مے اللہ forgive us all السلام و علیکم بردس and سیستیس hope this video was helpful for you this may help others too so please consider sharing and we will bring more videos in the future انشاء اللہ so consider subscribing and you won't miss any جزاک اللہ خیرن