 Manipulation is something very common in relationships today. People lie and cheat one another in a bead for control. It is not a pretty sight. Manipulation is about control. The person in a relationship who manipulates another person usually wants something that the other person has. Using manipulative techniques, they make the other person act in ways that benefits their agenda. According to time, manipulation is an emotionally unhealthy psychological strategy used by people who are incapable of asking for what they want and need in a direct way. It can be heartbreaking to find out someone as close as your best friend is or was manipulating you. People who manipulate others are toxic and therefore are not supposed to remain your friends. In today's video, I am going to share with you 12 signs that can help you detect that you are being manipulated. If you are new here, click the subscribe button for more awesome videos such as this one. 1. You often feel fear, obligation and guilt. This is a class sign you are being manipulated. People who do this to other people usually put their victim in an emotional roller coaster so that you never really catch your breath enough to think anything true. They make you scared, they might leave. And the next thing, they start to feel obligated. You give them things. Make sacrifices and they treat you like they are entitled to them. Whenever you try to choose yourself, they make you feel guilty for trying to choose yourself. People like this really don't care about you but it is not always easy to spot especially when they are such close friends. But then, your happiness matters a lot and anyone who is doing things to undermine it just has to go. Does he ask for a loan often and never pays back? Does he talk about his family situation and how badly everything has been? Does he use it as an excuse each time to borrow more money? Watch him closely. He is likely to do it again. As long as a manipulator thinks you haven't made them at their game, they are going to try and still manipulate you to continue to enjoy the benefits they were enjoying. Note that they may actually not know what they are doing in some rare instances but this is seldom the case. Whether or not they know what they are doing, you don't deserve to be treated that way. 2. You question yourself more frequently than normal. Do you doubt yourself a lot? Manipulators sometimes want to build co-dependency. How they do this is by questioning your opinion and mindset to the point where you become unsure of yourself. Once you get to the point where you have to ask for your permission or opinion to do anything, they have one. They will take you for a long ride. If you used to be confident, the manipulator would not want it. It will make manipulating you more difficult. The more dependent you are, the better for them. 3. There are strings attached. When manipulators do something for you, there are always strings attached. If someone gives you a lift for work and then starts axing you out on a date soon after, just know that his real intent had always been to ask you out on a date. Instead of doing that, they waited until you were in need and helped out. He perhaps hopes that you will agree to go to dinner with him as a payment for what he did for you. Ignore such people. As long as no papers were signed, such things cannot be enforceable in any cuts. Avoid people who start to ask for something after they have done you a favor. They will use the favor to squeeze out every last ounce of gratitude you can master. 4. Always have to go to meet your friend. They never come to meet you. 5. You argue all the time. You were probably very quiet and reserved when you met her. Then suddenly, you don't feel like yourself anymore. When someone is manipulating, you feel it is in your gut. This can make you angry with them for no reason at all. The slightest provocation would make you lash out at such a person with everything you have got. Breed. Nobody is what that type of stress. You need to relax your mind and heart. If he says what you don't like, tell him you don't like it and leave it there. If he is doing something you don't like, tell him if he does it again, leave him. Life is two shots to spend trying to fix what isn't yours to fix. 6. You feel emotionally drained all the time. Manipulators sometimes want you to be sad so that they can play the night in shiny armor. It is sick. But that's the reality. They can call and start a very long irrelevant conversation when they know you have a deadline to catch just to distract you. People who are too easygoing may not be able to wriggle out of this. More strong-willed people will let them know that they have stuff to do. When you do listen, they can tell you your problems and you will end up feeling drained every day. You will sleep joyless and wake joyless. No one deserves to be treated that way. If you notice this, don't take their calls frequently anymore and make up your mind to do what is best for you and not what is best for them. People like that will always exploit your goodwill and kindness if you give them the opportunity. 7. You feel like you are often under pressure. As a young person, work is already enough pressure. Imagine feeling under more pressure. This is actually the reality for a lot of people in manipulative relationships. The manipulator will usually not approve of your friends and will usually charge the atmosphere with unserved things so that you feel uncomfortable and willing to do anything to make the atmosphere lighter even if it benefits just him. People in this type of relationships feel pressure not to do things that displeases their partners. That is a very toxic type of relationship. Imagine suffering from depression over a relationship that actually adds no value to your life. 8. They always say hotful things to you. Welcome to the world of toxic relationships. Manipulators are bound to say anything at all that gives them the type of advantage. Your friends are supposed to be your pillars of support and not those who make you unhappy. What will a friend ordinarily gain when you are sad? Only a manipulator will. They know that when you are unhappy, you are more easily persuaded to do things. This depends on your temperament though. Either way, they are willing to hurt you to get what they want. Imagine someone calling you names and fighting with you 30 minutes to you going out just so that they can apologize and take your car to go out because they know you will no longer be in the mood to hang out. Some friends are that terrible. 9. They don't text back. Some of them do this to create anxiety and an imbalance of power through the silent treatment. It is quite foolish when you think of it for you to be worried. But then, when you are neck-deep in distance, it is as though you are not thinking clearly and just following your emotions. Experience has shown that thinking and not just going with the flow leads to a better quality of life. Going with the flow can get you pregnant. Going with the flow can leave you broke and hustling for a man you are not sure would ever love you. You are better than that. Pick yourself up and thrive. No one has anything on you. You are who you say you are. You are not a slave to anyone. You are a champion. Don't forget that. 10. Your friend uses guilt baiting on you. Guilt baiting is a manipulative technique in which the manipulator talks about his or her side experiences and ropes you into it by making some of them your fault. Such people can tell you that you don't know what it is like to be born into a poor family because you are privileged. They will then try to make you feel bad for being privileged so that you will pity them and always try to support them financially. This is a slippery slope though. Once you help the first time, they will always be asking you for help. 11. Your friend always prefers to talk in a place he feels more comfortable. Does your friend ever visit? Do you do all the visiting? Do you sometimes feel like you would have preferred to have certain conversations in a more open place or at least a place where you don't feel overwhelmed? Conversations like that of a relationship should be hard in a neutral place. Manipulators would prefer to have it where they are more comfortable. The truth is that manipulators are not very confident in themselves. If they were, they would be more open and straightforward. Don't allow yourself to be dragged into their mess. 12. Your bullet. Do you feel like you do things more out of compulsion rather than farewell in the relationship? Did you buy him a car so he wouldn't throw you a tantrum? Did you agree to date him so he wouldn't say hurtful things? You really should evaluate your relationship. People you hang out with influence you more than you know. You deserve confident friends who are pursuing your dreams and not those who leave off others and use pity as a weapon to drag others into the mud. However, to watch out for these signs, you deserve to be happy.