 Hello there, Lavaz. It's your girl, Shambhuri, and we are here at Heatonism 2. We're going to have an intimate conversation about our bodies that I don't think we get to have enough. And so come and join us on an intimate discussion on pussies and boobies. I'm at a clothing optional resort in Jamaica called Heatonism. The fruit side. Over there is the nude side. I can't show you. The one area that I wasn't allowed to like look at. I was like, oh, like that's the mystery. Like don't go there. Don't touch it. Like I knew that because I started masturbating when I was what, like four, three or four. I was really young when I learned that like if you dry humped a pillow, things would feel really good like quickly. So I knew that it was like a place that gave me pleasure and I also knew very early like I associated with it being bad. And it being like I'm not allowed to like touch it or look at it or whatever. No, I say my junk or like often I just refer to it as my bush because it's like the bush obscures the whole thing and really steals all the attention. Like people like I've really never had someone comment on the way that like my pussy looks to them. Like because like there's a lot of hair and you know what I mean? It's like fairly concealed and so it's like it's not the most prominent feature. But I also am I going into talking about like when I realized like what it looks like and all that. I also feel like I didn't know that vaginas could look different. Like I didn't know that there was so many different forms of them or that some people had like really long interleabias or like I just thought they all look the same. But it was kind of funny. One of my friends like maybe we're in our like later teens like we discovered this hanging clitoris term, you know, and I had no idea what that even meant. And she was like, oh yeah, like my friend has one and we're laughing about it, whatever. And then I finally like looked it up and I was like, I think I might have one. I'm like, was that me? And I was making fun of her and laughing but that might be me because I just had no idea what it is. But it's like it's still clean and neat and it's fine and you know, I feel good about it. Does that mean it kind of is like a little there's almost like an extra layer inside one of the labia as it feels like it's like the clitoris skin just kind of comes out a little bit. I think the what opened me up to that was when I went to like the wax lady and then she like when they comment on you, you're like, oh really? Like there's nice and not nice like, you know, it's also even that experience. I felt like it was the first like awkwardness because you're like, I'm just going to this woman. I'm going to sit on the table open up my legs. She's going to wax my Gucci and the first thing like she comments said was like, oh nice. And I was like really nice. What do you mean? How do you feel about me? I don't know what to do. I just want the hair gone right now. Like it was such a weird experience. But that was what made me start thinking about the fact that's like, oh yeah, there's probably quite a variety. As much as like even talking to like you, Ari or like other lesbians like what we've seen a lot. I've never heard you guys use the term ugly or weird. We're just happy to be there. Yeah. Honestly. It's more like different. But like I've seen like a lot of lips where you're kind of like, hey, where's the clitoris? Like I've seen that. But mine is like it's like in between. It's like it's not like super symmetrical and not like super like perfect. And I remember I was like a 15 year old kid like experiencing your period. Like I wanted to look like different. I wanted to be like, you know, like I wanted to be like an IKEA furniture piece. Like I wanted to be like very IKEA furniture is like perfectly symmetrical. I wanted to look like that. It really is like a thumbprint. Like everyone's is a little different. I will say where my insecurity comes in is definitely like I ask about smell a lot because like I got bacteria vaginosis like in my early 20s. And that just started like an onslaught of constant like yeast infection, UTIs, bacteria vaginosis. And like I worked at a desk job and I was like obsessed with like my smell. Like I could smell it sometimes through my pants or like it was just like a big concern for me all the time. And I'm like that made me really insecure with like new people or even being like in groups of spaces. Like can someone smell it? Can someone this? And like I remember one time this guy told me that he was like in the leachers and he was sitting between a girl's legs and he could smell it. And like I was so insecure that that could be me. Actually, you know, now that you now that you mentioned it, my best friend in high school and I also spent a lot of like naked time together and had like a sort of erotic relationship. I do remember her vagina and I remember that that was maybe actually the first time when I was sort of like, huh, that looks really different than mine. And her smell was so distinctive. Like I can still remember it this day. And like it was like pungent in this weird way. And I don't know. Attractive pungent? I was so attracted to her. So it must have been. But like the smell itself, this is what's the weird disconnect for me because usually for me, it's like smell is such an indicator. Like I'm like, oh, you smell right to me. Like you smell like it's just like I don't even know like what you're saying about like diet or whatever. Like I've never like noticed that. It's just like I like it or I don't. It just seems like such a like particular thing. But her is like, oh my God, like it's like I was really into her and so like just magnetically drawn to her. But at the same time, like that smell wasn't great. I've been talking about this a lot like love vegetarians got to love the vegans because like it just feels like a diet. Diet is so key. And I think that like it's it's almost like an indicator of like other things about your body. Like and so I kind of have peace of it in that way. I'm like, you know, some people have problem skin. Some people have like our super hairy. Like I just have a very sensitive vulva. And if I don't eat the right foods or I'm not on it, like with care, it will go to either extreme. So do you use a different body wash? Yeah, I actually recently started doing that. You know the Dieta cup? Yeah. They have like an actual like pH balance like body wash or whatever. But I'm like, oh my God, why was I doing this my whole life? I don't get affected by it. But all of a sudden one day I was like, you know what? Maybe I should just like try it. You feel like you're treating it like gold. I was like, oh my God, I should have been doing this forever. I love the smell. I'm like a big fan of the smell actually. I've never felt weird about that. Although there are times where I'm like, oh, it's definitely like stronger today. I'm like, I'm at peace with it now because I'm like, I just respect you for who you are. Like you're just like a finicky ass motherfucker. Like that's who you are. You're high maintenance. I have a high maintenance Gucci. And I'm like, but it's cool because like again, like the sensation you get from it. I love the way that it looks like when I feel on top of the smell situation, I even value and appreciate that a lot. So I also think it's something to do with me like relaxing a bit, you know, like giving myself permission to not always be perfect or not always be, you know, commercially appealing. So it's a balance of both. Like, yeah, you're going to have to find out how to manage it, but also learn how to manage insecurities. And acceptance of what's real too, right? Like whether it's hair or all these things. It's like, but it's okay. Like it's not something you have to be ashamed about. Hair is still a thing I'm like going through. Yeah. Like I like respect. You're on a journey right now though. Yeah, I'm on a journey. Like I kind of like respect Kelsey and like what she has going on because it is like a main attraction. And like you're cool with that. And so that's a beautiful thing in itself because I'm still like, is that okay? No, is it okay to be hairy? Is that because that for so long and in my previous relationship, like he was always complaining like you're spiky or this and like I felt like, oh, like I'm half Indian. It's very hard for me to keep on top of the hair situation. But again, I also kind of think it's something with me too. Like you get to call the shots for your body. If you let other people tell you what sex you're acceptable and that becomes like what your routine is, then it's something that you have to break free of because people are going to have an opinion regardless. And you're going to go around trying to like fashion your body to fit someone else's needs. You're going to find yourself always feeling unhappy and not enough. I'm good with it most of the time. I really don't have to struggle. Like I feel happy with it. It brings me lots of joy and I'm thankful for that. So, you know, I have no complaints. It does wonderful things. Shout out to your pussy. Thank you guys for watching this video. In the comments section below, let me know what has your journey been with your own or with somebody else's vulva, vagina, pussy, whatever your preference is when it comes to both appearance and the smell of it. In addition, please go and subscribe to my new vlog channel. And of course, subscribe to this one. And while you're pressing buttons, like this video. Love you guys. Bye.