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All right guys I want to bring something up right now that I think they needs to be talked about This is like what's that come to Jesus for somebody no, no, there's this new kind of like Segment of the fitness industry that's starting to gain some traction and I'm starting to see articles written in this fashion or what you know with this kind of Philosophy or belief system around Fitness and health and it's kind of it's starting to creep into you know What we do and what I mean by that is at first it was kind of small and like nobody cared right But now it's getting a little bit more mainstream and it I think it's very dangerous in the sense that it's not gonna help anybody It's actually gonna hurt quite a bit. Yeah, so there was this article that was in the Washington Post In fact, I did a post about it on my Instagram. It's called Five myths about obesity. Oh, yeah, okay, and I stirred it up a little bit with that I did and I read it and it's I couldn't believe I mean I part of me is like I can't believe what they're saying the other part of me is like, okay Well, this is just kind of the direction that it seems things are going so I'll tell you I'll tell you a couple of things I'll read a couple of things you guys can hear, you know kind of get an idea So one of the myths that they put in there I think it was the first myth from not mistaken is that obesity results from lifestyle choices So that's a note. That's a myth according to this. Oh, it's a myth. Yeah, that's a myth There's no way that can happen. Yeah, according to set and it says in this article and again This is what makes it so dangerous as they position it like it's science and like this is the truth, right? Here's part of that that segment says most up-to-date research indicates that the causes of obesity are complex and cannot be explained solely by choices By solely by calories in and out based on diet and exercise calorie absorption or energy derived from consumed food varies among individuals and is determined not only by portion size at mealtime, but by factors such as gut microbes Hormones digestive enzymes and nerve signals when it comes to burning calories metabolism as a major player and there was growing evidence that genetics Sleep deprivation medication stress and even the environment a person was exposed to in utero Can contribute to unhealthy weight gain. So there's that part right. I love that right there Let's throw some buzzwords around so I sound like we know or talk about areas sounds like to me and a lot of the stuff that they're saying is Is also choice right hormones my hormones are awful your lifestyle affects that quite a bit Digestive enzymes microbes like a lot of that is your life. Well, and here's where I mean where an article like this probably goes viral is that Everything they're saying is not not true either right like that. Yeah, it is complex Yeah, all it is complex all those things do affect it But to just discount that your choice and your behaviors have nothing to do with it is right It takes the responsibility part out. Yes. Yes. So here's another part of it, right? The here's another myth and I think this was like number three, right? This is the myth that they put Dieting and exercise will reverse severe obesity. That's a myth apparently And now now in any in this is something we talk about. Well, okay. Yeah again, I'm gonna play like them So why you do this? I'm gonna be pretty like them. It's failed, right? It's failed for the last three decades in a row. We've been trying to we've there's hundreds There's thousands of diets out there. There's thousands of programs and routines out there Obesity continues to be on the rise. Therefore if that supposedly is the answer, it's not working That's what makes it so dangerous What makes it so dangerous is they'll take some truth and then they'll twist it in a way that absolves everybody of any Empowerment right and play this game. So here's what they say in there There is growing evidence that diet and exercise alone are Ineffective at decreasing and maintaining a lower BMI Particularly for people with severe obesity defined as BMI of 40 or more in fact Weight loss causes hunger to increase and metabolism to slow down which can lead to weight regain Most of the contestants on the biggest loser have ended up gaining a significant amount of weight back Which we've talked about so this makes me this I'll give you an example of kind of what they're doing, right? So we have a door to our studio and we can go in and out and if I want to open the door From the inside I have to open have to pull it in right but let's say I go and turn the doorknob and push And then I just keep pushing and I come back and be like doors broken doors don't work Doors don't work. You can't go from one room to another without a door only. I'm wrong. Yes, so They're not wrong in the sense that the biggest loser people gained their weight back and they're not wrong that we're fit We're failing, right? Yes. Yes, but it's not because diet and exercise are Ineffective it's because the wrong approach with diet and exercise which I mean we built our entire podcast off of that You know lead to this kind of thing, right? So and then one more thing that's kind of a part of this Culture that we're starting to see now start to permeate the fitness industry So it kind of sounds like it's not related, but it is so there's this page on Instagram And I don't know this person they might be a very nice person I have no idea who they are but I got tagged on their thing and then I looked in their posts and I couldn't believe some The stuff that I was reading Her name is she seems like she's smart fear. This is the name of her Instagram Fierce fat Fem. That's the name of it fierce fat Fem Fem spelled F E M M E, right? Okay, and there's a post that says not not finding fatness attractive is Not just the preference. It's fat phobia She can't have preferences anymore. Yeah, now could you now? Okay, and then on the whole thing let's say I'll read some of this It's like I read this and I was like what? 3,000 likes this is a woke fitness, bro that hundred percent woke fitness is here. What it's ideology Yes, so and I read now here's listen to the first part of the post underneath it If you're only dating or fucking or being attracted to a certain look Hmm, there's a good chance that you're participating in a harmful ideology Wow the excuse of saying that I'm just not attracted to fat people is over and done with what does that statement even mean? Why are you not attracted to fatness? Is it ready for this? Is it systemic ideologies and biases is it anti-fat stigma if we aren't attracted to our own Fatness we should be asking why these questions deserve some clear introspective reflection and Time to chew on and then it goes on into more right more and more stuff now Was that an art signal was that an article two are you just reading a post? No, that's her post, but she's got a lot of followers I mean that what I just read right there and there's more to it and it gets way crazier And I don't feel like going into mm-hmm 3,000 likes mm-hmm with 3,000 people that read that and we're like, yeah Well, there was a few people I saw not very many because I thought you I thought the way you presented your post was Was perfect and clear, but you did you know ruffle a couple feathers I did see some people on there that yeah, you know, you're not a mental expert. Yeah Yeah, I mean I want to be really clear You know all the three of us built our our career around our passion for helping Yes, people and you know, we all trained a lot of people who struggled I mean the majority of the people that I trained struggled with obesity and I have a lot of empathy for that struggle. It is hard. Yeah, it's not easy Mm-hmm, and all people deserve dignity and respect. I don't care if you're obese or thin or an alcoholic or Whatever, you know, of course if you treat people terribly you steal from them. You hurt people That's a different story, but if you have your own struggles and we all have them by the way And here's a challenge with obesity Obesity is so visible, right? Yeah, you you can't necessarily see someone struggle with Their own relationships or maybe their finances or maybe another substance because you can't really tell right But it's somebody that struggles with food and activity and body image issues and they're obese It's very visible. It makes them easy to get you can you can be a functioning Alcoholic and people not even know but you can't be a functioning food addict and people not know Yeah, people will see it and then they're easily targeted and people are often very mean and cruel and I'm so opposed I think that's terrible and that only contributes to the problem. So I have a lot of empathy, but also What doesn't help the situation is to lie about it and and tell people You have no responsibility in this, you know You this is not your fall and just just and it's great. You're fine. It's all awesome There's no issues with with how you're irony for me is I feel like a society has tried really hard to base it more around scientific principles and it feels like we've Completely started to move away from that and in disregard Empirical data and you know scientific practices that are sound because now it doesn't fit our personal narrative of what I want personally Yeah, totally. It's it's almost like you're what you're trying to do is you're and it's a very effective strategy like if you take I mean Look at my kids for example But if my my son is starts to flunk out on his classes and I sit him down and I go listen, buddy It's not your fault. This is not your this is not, you know, you did nothing wrong Even though I know maybe he was lazy didn't study hard or whatever Don't work, you know, this is that you have no responsibility in this just and you're awesome And this is great and don't worry about it. I'm be setting him up for failure. By the way, even if it was hard for him The way I would tell him is I know it was a struggle. I know it was hard. Here's the reality It's no one's responsibility, but yours, you know, you have to do some of that whole message of struggle Like we know the value of struggle We know that the journey is everything that you know You can go in through that struggle is where you learn everything and how you're able to handle Any kind of challenge that's presented to you and it's just it, you know, like to avoid it completely is Just like disingenuous. Yeah, I do I do blame us for this new woke culture I really do I think that We we have failed the fitness space for so long at helping people and I would I would argue that percent I would argue that many of the people in the fitness industry are more motivated to have success personally and build their business and make money than they are truly after helping people and that has been been the the way for the last few decades in the fitness space and So we have failed the masses that truly helping them get to the root cause of problems like this So that's why articles like this and people can come out and make this case is that look it Here's all the research to show that we've known about diet. We've known about exercise We've known about all these things. We've got all these professionals that are helping supposedly all these people But they're really not helping all these people. Yeah, so they're just abandon it. Well, yeah I mean now that's not me defending this, you know idea of no personal responsibility Well, you're actually taking some responsibility. That's right. I I feel somewhat responsible for This because I feel like this is a response to us not doing a good job I agree with you because I think mainstream When I say mainstream, I mean the one the the segment of the fitness industry in space that's like popular, right? So if you look at like there's a there's a by the way, I guess loser Yes, like most trainers most personal trainers who've been doing it for a while in gyms and in studios Sincerely care and do a damn good job. Yeah, and giving a good message problem is nobody knows who they are That's right. That's the thing when you look at the popular trainers the ones that the household names the celebrity trainers When you look at the the popular workout programs the ones that sell, you know A half a billion dollars of of these workout poor programs workout equipment, you know This this workout pill the diet pills like that's the mainstream side of the fitness space They have totally failed and they've sold it the wrong way. They've communicated the wrong message Actually, they've fed into The wrong things right they fed into these insecurities totally and these woke people now are picking up on it They're realizing it like oh, we've been fed a bunch of lies It doesn't work and pedaled a bunch of shit and this is the response to that now I don't agree with it, right? And I think it's an overcorrection. Yes completely wrong Oh, I totally see that but I also I understand I understand because we have we failed them for some yeah It's a loud response to that like it's not working what you guys are pushing on us isn't working And so, you know now it's just like even more necessary that they get truth to get presented right here Okay, so go to the oh the biggest loser is a great example, okay? We've talked at nauseam at the their methods are wrong. It's gonna cause the weight gain It's gonna slow down people's metabolism hammer the hormones doesn't address the root cause of anything We've talked about that at nauseam Here's what really used to bother me about that show you'd watch the show and you'd see Jillian Michaels Blasting this obese person on a treadmill Oh Get up lazy Yeah, you got a fucking do it now. They're doing it not for the person It's for the audience and then you have people watching TV like yeah fucking hammer that lazy person Yeah, they deserve it. I know it's it's it's pretty disgusting. It's terrible, right? And but that's the mainstream and then you have other trainers and this is the minority not the majority But there are a minority of trainers that actually believe that they're they're fit They look good mainly because they're insecure themselves. They had their own body image issues So then they get someone who hires them and they're like this is what works for me. Yeah hate yourself Yeah, do nothing but work out like eat all motivation hype. Yes, and then that results in more problems So I'm so glad you said that Adam because and this was this was the this was actually our goal When we started mine pump was like we need to like Reverse this or or get to the point where maybe we become mainstream. So at least we're the counter can have a conversation around Yes, so we could be the counter and as far as a conversation Then I want let's have a conversation around why this, you know, woke fitness is gonna be unhealthy, right? Now first thing I want to do is I want to address that that girl's post which is silly People have their own preferences because they're attracted to what they are and what they're not and it's not your damn business Is that your damn business could you imagine a guy by the way? Let's just reverse this imagine if a guy was at a club and he was talking to a girl And he's like hey you want to like let's go hook up or whatever. She's like no leave me alone And he's like ah, it's because you don't you know like and he uses the same tactic like a creep You know, I mean, yeah, oh you must you must not be into guys then Creepy. Oh, well you gotta like creepy guys. Yeah, like we're humans, too Yeah, that's silly people are attracted what they're attracted to it's it's not fat phobia or whatever Anything that appears to be by the way says evolutionary unhealthy Tens people tend to be unattractive to this just whatever but people have their preferences. I don't care Not to mention most I think most surveys even show that like guys like curvy thicker thicker women Most guys don't like their women buff and lean and there is a market for that You know, it's like it's just have a blanket statement that everybody needs to like the same thing is ridiculous Yeah, that's ridiculous But that's also a part of this whole like you know kind of woke, you know fitness movement And then the other part homogenize everything. Yeah, and the other part of it is it's not your responsibility It's not your fault. It's everybody else's fault and there's nothing you can do that'll change it And loving yourself means being this way. This is all Accepting it totally false, right? So let's start with the first thing that I think is counter to this kind of like woke Fitness message number one at the end of the day Ultimately your health is your responsibility. No one else's it's your responsibility and the sooner you realize This the better off you are now. This doesn't mean that you can solve all of your health problems That's right It doesn't mean there's not some people that have more challenges than others, right? But at the end of the day you are the only that's it's your body. It's your health. It's not anybody else's responsibility It's not anybody's responsibility to pay for your health to tell you what to do nobody's forcing things into your mouth or Forcing other situations and I know there's some situations that are far more challenging than others Obviously if you grow up in a household where you learn to eat a particular way Well, the challenge is now kind of deconstructing that behavior and that's a very challenging thing to do It's extremely hard to do but at the end of the day the only way that you'll ever first of all It feels empowered. You're empowered when you realize it's your responsibility You don't feel disempowered even you know, they've done studies where they've actually put people in cages and They've given them a sense of autonomy and then they've had people in cages and they make them feel like they have no control whatsoever The people who feel at least some sense of autonomy far better off mentally far better off in fact Yeah, the health markers are way better. In fact when you read books of on POWs who are like they're trapped forever They say the ones out of the ones that had the hope and stuff. Yeah, you got it You got to give yourself that sense of like I okay at least I can control this and this is my response It is my responsibility with my attitude and I can at least you know Do these things and they do much they fare much better because here's the deal Even if you believe your health is your responsibility and doesn't fix anything just feeling that is empowering and is better for you Then feeling like you're out of control and everybody else, you know controls your health and has nothing to do with you So it is your responsibility Accept it. I'm not saying it's easy but accept it if my health is poor It's my responsibility to see if I can help myself Figure this solution out or you'll find the solution seek help or seek help or research You know and find these things out I've had clients where they've had to go from doctor I mean very challenging situations where they've had to go from doctor to doctor to doctor to die For years to figure out what the hell is wrong with them But they never gave up because they're like this is my Responsibility to my health. Yeah, and then eventually a couple years later Found out that there was a weird genetic issue that could be solved by supplementing with the particular amino acid or whatever Yeah, and it's solved, you know, there's not just gonna like fall on your lap It's just not gonna work out like that You got to really like take ownership responsibility of yourself and in your own efforts in that direction and that's just the bottom Yes, why do you think this this argument is so appealing to people? It's always appealing for somebody to say you're you're absolved of responsibility It's very appealing right like let's say, you know, you bet you went bankrupt or you broke a law You went to jail or the market's fault. It's this fall. Yeah Point the finger. Yeah, like cuz you because accepting responsibility feels Hard and it feels like oh man if I do that now I have to admit that I had I played a role in that and That's tough, but I promise you on the other end of that is way better than than saying it's none of nothing It's my responsibility, but it totally is I mean think about kids like it's by the way the strat things that work on kids You know, it's oftentimes same thing with adults like imagine if you have kids in front of you and you just keep telling them that That's not your fault. I don't worry. This is it's totally not your fault. You none of this stuff is your teachers fall Yes, the yeah, it's the school's fault. It's everybody else's fault. It's not you. Yeah, why won't anybody play with me? I have no friends, you know, and it's like listen you're a jerk It's it's those parents. It's those parents that raise these kids that are writing these fucking articles Those the parents that broke that's exactly what they're trace it back. That's exactly that's you are I mean that is that is a very true statement like think about the you know the whole like every kid gets a trophy When you're playing a game, do you know how important it is to know to lose? Yeah, when you're when you're a kid. Yeah, it's not it hurts your kid cries. It sucks Whoa, that is an important lesson to learn because life is gonna hand you shit like that all the time We're not all built the same. Yeah, you know, and it's okay And then that's the thing celebrate diversity I celebrate all the time that there's differences in everybody and that should be more elevated Then you know cut down, you know that my my godson is in a Montessori school and they were I was talking to Oh Montessori. Oh, it's not Montessori. Yeah Montessori. I think sorry. Yeah, of course. I fucked it Montessori not sorry. Yeah, that's right Montessori school And they they were telling me like the way they the way they teach Play and when they call it work and they separate them in groups and they actually I thought there's and she doesn't like this That's why she was sharing with me. She goes The kids don't have to share if they don't want to share. Yeah, they're allowed to say I'm not done with it I'm in my personal space beautiful and the other kid can't come in and can't do that No, I don't know if that is beautiful to teach them that they don't have to share and play and Not have to go through the challenge of working it out with a kid and so I've talked to Jessica about this. Yeah, okay So, okay, so sorry to cut you off. I think You tell your kid you don't have to share But here's what's gonna happen if you don't and then they see nobody wants to play with exactly Nobody wants to share their toys. They gotta find out the consequences of that Yeah, and this is where it's like the mandating of the you know the teacher like all or the parent is all you have to show you always have to give away your stuff and You know, it doesn't it doesn't allow them to be an individual that can discern, you know Like I don't want to do that. So, you know, but they don't learn what happens as a result of not sharing Yeah, totally. It's like when you're forced your kid to say sorry. Yeah, you know, I mean say sorry Like what does it mean if they get there? Yeah, if they're forced to say it, right? Yeah, but then they have to learn the like the the consequences of those of those types of actions just like Losing in a game of you know, basketball or soccer or something like that like we're getting a bad grade on a test I've had this conversation with my kids where they'll they'll they'll get a test back and it comes back my daughter Especially she's very competitive very like I need to do a good job She'll get a test back be very upset because it's not the score that she wanted and I'll say well, you know What do you think you could have done to get a better grade and I did work real hardest I know you did but do you think there's anything you could have done? To get a better grade. Do you think you might have done better if you studied harder or did it a little longer? And we've had these conversations and I tell her you might not want to do those things It might be too much time in which case that's fine But if you're upset you need to understand, you know Maybe there was something you could have done to change that and that just empowers you as an adult I think especially when you learn that as a kid The next one that I think is important to understand is they're starting to define obesity as a disease I think that's a mistake because that moniker comes along with the the no responsibility behind it, right? Like I was born with this disease like it's a you know, it's a disease You know, it's not my fault type of deal. That's the problem I have and I know what they say obesity is a disease because it impairs your Movement and it affects all these other things definitely contributes to disease, but obesity in and of itself I don't think is a disease and I think that's a Not a smart way to present it to people well It's just it's just a small percentage of population to that I have like this like a one-off situation where they they have this this gene That it makes it extremely difficult for them Yeah, and you're lumping the masses into that group because that's the thing that's so hard with this Is there exceptions to the rule with everybody that we're talking to I think there's always gonna be an exceptions rule There's always gonna be somebody that has something that isn't that isn't something they can control Right, but when we speak to the masses like this to say, oh, you know We can't say that everybody can control this one situation Therefore everybody gets to be excused of the responsibility. That's the real dangerous part about this Like I think you can be very empathetic that and understanding that there are people out there that have certain conditions and challenges That they can't do anything about and it's and it's unfortunate and it's unfair But because that half of a percent of the population that might have that that condition or that situation Now we're gonna write articles and we're gonna promote a message out there that gets the whole masses to believe like oh I think I'm on that it just seems like another way to diffuse or defer the Responsibility back on it. I can I actually have a handle on this I can control my lifestyle habits that you know will reflect a healthier a version of myself versus I have a disease That you know was passed on to me And so I just eat this way because that's part of like who I am Do you remember when this when this gain traction like when when they started saying that because it wasn't that long ago It wasn't and in here's the problem with it is that let's say you you have a disease Now health insurance treats you for that disease in a particular way your employer Treats you a certain way because you have a disease. So maybe you get more time off You get you're excused from doing certain things because of this, you know disease that you have So when you label just obesity as a disease now you can by the way and here's here's the thing That this is actually quite true You can be obese and although being obese by itself is less healthy than not being obese all other things being considered You can still be obese and not necessarily be Unhealthy super unhealthy like that you can be fit and fat, right? Now again, if you're fit and lean versus fit and fat the same individuals probably healthier being fit and lean But you can be overweight have a high BMI and not have diabetes not have black, you know bad blood lipids not have You know, you know cholesterol issues or blood pressure. Well, those are all the physiological things There's mental things too and relationships and you know financial health. There's other things that that encompass health So you could have all those other ones you check in the boxes on that But you carry a little extra body fat, right? So my point is like just because your BMI is high now your employer says, oh this person has a disease Even though that disease that you know obesity itself may not necessarily impair you with other stuff Now obesity leads to diseases and that's a totally different story But just saying obesity itself is a disease is a problem and what will start happening is that people who are obese will start getting treated with particular privileges that people with diseases tend to get treated with And this might even cause some kind of a strange incentive for people to have this you know this right and I mean like to your point of Being excused from things. I think that that that could kind of go in hand with this in terms of like even physical education Well, I don't like it, you know, and I want to sit this out because it you know My disease like makes me feel You know, like my heart races too much and I feel dizzy and then so I'm just not gonna do this this activity at all Because of my disease. Well, the neck the next point that I think of is this this whole Self-love movement has gone. I feel like extreme so twisted. Yeah, they twisted it like it's it's become this like Okay, we can't we cannot love ourselves and then equal also be able to say I'm not taking care of myself Correct like it. You can't why can't you do that? Why can't I say that? Hey, I love I love who I am I love everything about myself, but I also know I've been making some bad choices I haven't been taking good care of myself and because of that my body and my health reflected Yeah, I remember when we interviewed Bishop Baron and he talked about the death like what love was and he says a lot of people Think love is a feeling. He goes love is actually an action It's how you treat like like, you know, you have family members that you don't always feel love for Sometimes you might actually not like them. Yeah, but you choose to do things for them to be there for them Because you're doing the action of love, right? Real love is hard and tough It's nothing. There's nothing easy about real love. I think every parent understands every parent knows that so it would be like me being like You know, I'm a cocaine addict. Why are you cocaine addict Sal? I'm loving myself right now Like you're actually not loving yourself right feels good to do all that cocaine Yeah, but you're not loving yourself. I would just feed my kids jelly beans all day, you know Like I just that's what they want so give it to them Right. Why why should I do any different like what? Why should I have barriers? Why should I create, you know, like healthy habits and things for them to abide by? They're gonna fight me on it and they do fight me all the way through But why should I stick to the fight dude? I had a client once very successful whose son started to getting having developing issues with drugs and Eventually and it was a very tough for her. She's like I had to cut him off Because I had to create a like a bottom for him so that he could start to feel otherwise I was supporting him by having him live with us and giving him, you know money and paying for things and It actually helped the kid finally seek out therapy and you know helped himself out But she had to do what they call tough love, right? She had to love him enough to do the thing That was very challenging real love is is real. It's it's it's you know, you can say to yourself Look, I I do love myself I don't always act like I do though like I definitely do things that are that are not taking care of me You know, sometimes I I drink too much or I'm not active and I can feel it in my body and my joints And I'm not really caring for my and by the way, that's okay. We don't always care for ourselves perfectly all the time I'm in the fitness space. I could tell you I don't do that all the time But it has to be kind of real about it. What they did is they took this Self-love acceptance message and they twisted it to where You know doing whatever you want or whatever it feels good. That's what that's what it is doing. Whatever feels good means That's self-love. So even though it's causing severe obesity. It's causing my health to decline my mobility I can't move like I used to I don't feel good. My sleep is affected whatever. Well, that's me loving myself It's actually not you're not actively loving yourself when you're doing that, you know I mean Justin brought up the jelly beans and things and the king giving the kids they want which sometimes I feel like that's kind of a hard Comparison to draw for some of these people that are trying to figure this out and As we're talking about it the first thing that comes to mind that I think relates to this the most or where I struggled with something very similar myself For a long time in my my up into my late 20s I would bail my my mom out and my family out financially So if they got behind on bills this or that and it were family, right? We're family. I love my mom I would never I would love my sister and brother and I would I would you know get them out of it Like, you know, they're behind on this they're behind on that like catch them up And then it was just and that's been a part of my life since I was a young kid I've been helping out financially since as long as I could work and make any money and I remember I was training a client one time that was a psychologist and and he was talking to me about The and I was struggling and I would you know talk to him with a good relationship I would vent about it like I you know, I just I did this for my mom and this then I see her go out And she does this and does that he goes, you know, Adam I know you think that you giving her money is because you love her But you need to reframe that and he goes if you really loved her you would say no And I was like well, that's not how she makes me feel she makes me feel if I say no I'm the worst son was well. Yeah, it's hard, you know, but you Continuing to give her money and bail out all the time like that is you're actually crutching and you're actually hurting her more And so I had to reframe the way I looked at it and I tell you it was the hardest transition ever to go Of course, you know, I get that, you know and say that so I know that there there's people that are in this position I know it's it's very hard when you're in this situation to to be able to say that to yourself and to do that But again to Sal's point of that's that's attributing it to the feeling only You know, the love is the feeling of it because it does feel good when your kids are excited about giving you treats like oh I'm giving them love. Oh, give me hug, you know, and then they're much more likely to you know respond that way versus You know giving them something that they're you know, you know that their body's gonna benefit from it But they're gonna have all kinds of pushback and And and and we're always I mean again, it's it's it's a difficult thing because sometimes you want that like I want I seek that out. I want to hug and I want to have everybody happy and in a good mood and You know, and it sucks to you To be able to be the person that that does apply the tough love, but then you know, there's of course There's a balance there as well. So you got to recognize love is not always easy No, it's it's it's hard. I went through the same thing I went through like what you're talking about Justin man after I got Divorced, you know, and then I you know, we did this kind of dual custody thing, right? Where the kids are half with their mom half with me. Oh boy, did I struggle with that because of the I wanted them just to be Happy, right because we just got divorced now They got to live in two houses and I'm feeling really bad about that for them And I just wanted them to be happy. So for like a year, whatever they wanted they got I'd buy him shit They eat whatever they want like it's fun time all the time Yeah, and then after a while I realizing like this is not this is just me wanting them to feel good But I'm not really helping them by doing that's not what real life is about. I'm not really acting like I love them I'm just acting like I'm afraid that they'll have bad feelings which which really wasn't good It was a big. It was a very challenging struggle. I'll tell you what this point about self-love was This is what I focused on the most with my clients who were challenged with obesity because this was the most important one This was the one that if we could figure out and and oftentimes we did especially later on my career when I got much better at Communicating this once we figured it out what naturally happened is people naturally develop the sense of balance, right? Because if you really love yourself in the truest sense in the hard sense as well Then and let's say you're obese What you're probably gonna do is most of the time you're probably gonna have tough love with yourself with your diet Right because you're used to eating in particular way Maybe this isn't true for everyone, but let's just say maybe food is your comfort for you It's how you deal with let's say stress or bad feelings. So your food has become kind of a drug This is quite common. And so now you have to have this tough love with yourself and say This way that you make yourself feel better. We're gonna have to take this away For a little while and it's not gonna feel good. Oh, that's really really hard, right? So most of the time you'll probably do that But then if you're actually loving yourself in the truest sense the occasional moment will come up Well, you'll be like, okay, I have been taking care of myself. I have been eating in a way that that cares for my body It's been very difficult. I've been doing this now for two months. My sister's coming to visit tomorrow. I haven't seen her in a while She she makes this incredible chicken pot pie that we and we used to eat when we were kids and You know what this day what's healthy for me is to connect with my sister We're gonna eat the chicken pot pie. We're gonna have a glass of wine and you get this Natural balance and what doesn't happen is a binge. Yeah, the binge doesn't happen because the binge comes from False self-love where you finally go off this diet because you're like I can't take it anymore, right? And then you go way off in the wrong direction. Well, you have you have to address and you and I think you do it so well Self-image versus body image absolutely because this is where I think people get hung up here That's right. They think to the same thing. Yeah, no, your self-image is like am I a person worthy of being taken care of? Am I human worthy of some dignity some respect? You know, I have some good qualities to me. I'm not a bad person body image is Just objective. I look in the mirror. I'm short. I'm tall. I'm hairy I'm you know bald or I'm fat or I'm overweight And I haven't been taking care of myself or I'm underweight because I haven't been taking care of myself or my digestion is off Because I haven't that's objective, but that doesn't define your who you are in terms of yourself, right? I can look in the mirror and say, you know, man, I've been not taking care of myself with food It's been not really good. That doesn't make me a bad person Geez for fuck's sake like we all do shit to ourselves. That isn't good So it's okay. You need to have empathy with yourself and forgive yourself and that's important because if you don't then you'll end up Hating yourself through food, which looks probably the way that you're eating now if you're struggling with this So you need to forgive yourself like okay like be empathetic like okay. I know it's hard. This has been tough I haven't been taking care of myself. I'm a good person like that's the difference. It's not oh my god I don't look good. I'm a bad person. I don't deserve care love or any of that stuff When you confuse self-image with body image or self-image with other objective things Then you then you really have a problem then it becomes a real big challenge Yeah I used to tell my clients to look at it and just say instead of looking at like oh, I'm fat or this dad look at like Well, I've been really enjoying myself lately. I've got a lot of stored energy, you know Like that's how I would tell them to put it to you So instead of it being like negative like looking yourself in the mirror going like I'm fat or you know Or on these things it's just like wow I've been really enjoying myself and I've got all this extra stored energy that I need to put to use right so reframe Even how you look at absolutely the next one. This is an important one now is that obesity? This is the objective Scientific 100% truth is not healthy. Okay. Now that doesn't mean that you can't have Okay, health and be obese. This doesn't mean that you can be lean and have poor health Of course, you can be lean and have this time's been under attack. I feel like the most yes late what it means is all Other factors controlled all other factors considered, you know If I took somebody who was healthy lean and I just added 50 pounds of body fat on their body So everything else is the same. They just have an additional 50 pounds of body fat Their health has become worse because of that extra body fat So lots of body fat very inflammatory on the body. It's it's a hormone sensitive tissue Obviously adds Non-functional weight to your body meaning I'm now 50 pounds heavier, but it's not 50 pounds of functional muscle working for me Yeah, yeah, so I'm gonna my joints are being worn out that kind of stuff now This is another one that I'm gonna take the stance that it's our fault again so and I really I Really didn't realize how much this was our fault Until I got into the competing space because these are when you when you look at that that little bubble of people Right that 1% that they get on staging compete. These are they are the representation of the magazines Yes, the TV stars the magazines like most the sexy hot fit and healthy. That's right Yeah, they are the ones that are on all the magazine covers that everybody talks about that have millions of followers on social media They are a representation of the fitness space right now and until I got into it I did not know just how unhealthy they were and so I can't blame this This woke fitness culture right now For taking the stance about you know being able to be obese and still unhealthy because if you compare them to those people There are a lot in fact I've probably met more obese or very overweight people that are actually even healthier than these Yeah, that portrayal is what they're getting like that. That's what they're looking at in terms of Okay, if I have to really work on myself I got to get myself to this kind of condition this kind of shape like I've seen what they do. I'd see they bring the bags with them everywhere. They're neurotic about it Like they don't want like their their relationships suffer as a result of it like all these types of things very Very visibly obvious and and you know somewhere along, you know the the spectrum Uh, you know, we're just skipping right past all these like normal people I don't even know if it's very visibly obvious because I was fooled by it You know, yeah, I know that and we can make the case that all these people are addicted to working out But they can also make make the case that that just they love what they do, right? So that's not that's not a good enough case for me where they fall short is all the other parts of health Right the being so self-absorbed being massively insecure of that's what really drives them having terrible relationships Abusing drugs to get to that point. I mean so many other markers that tell you how healthy you are or not Are so out of whack. Yeah, they have this one in place the exercise and diet restriction They've got that one in place But all the rest and I'm and I'm sure people that are writing these articles are woke they woke the fuck up and they saw They went, oh my god I've met enough of these knuckleheads And I've got I got this this left group of friends that there's 10 of these bodybuilders And then I have my right obese friends and you know what? When I hang out with my fat friends They actually have a better balance of life and they actually have a better relation Better relationship with money better relationship with their partner better relationship with their family You know have better balance in their life better at work I mean you start seeing that you go like whoa Okay, well obese can be help it could definitely be healthier than the people right now that we've been praising as the healthiest in the space Yeah, no, that's it. It's such a good point if you look at all of the representations of health that we have in mainstream media. What is it? It's uh, uh professional athletes It's uh models right good-looking sexy people You don't see a single gray hair on any woman over the age of 30 and any of these, uh, you know models or fitness professionals Everything looks perfect. They're sculpted. They're shredded. There's you know Photoshop and plastic surgery or whatever and so we look at them and we think Those are the representations of health. They're not, you know, I remember years ago and never forget this But my early in the fitness space when I started working the fitness space I was uh, you know, I thought that I thought that it was athletes that were professional athletes that by the way Professional athletes are not the healthiest. They're extreme performers and oftentimes their lifespan is shorter than the average person Uh, because of it, but I thought pro athletes the healthiest models healthy fitness, you know fanatics These people on magazines super healthy. I'll never forget Were two people in particular that really shattered my mind with this there was this guy that came in once and he was Older gentleman. I couldn't really figure out his age. He looked like he was in his 50s when he came in, you know gray hair Great posture, you know really, you know good nice skin or whatever And he wasn't like overly muscular or super shredded, but he looked very fit very healthy And he would come in and he was part of that six a.m. Crew right if when you run a gym Uh, there's there's the same people the people that work out in the morning are the most consistent They always show up same time So anytime I was in there at six a.m. To audit the front desk or because we were having a closeout or whatever I would see this guy he'd come in and I used to watch him work out And I remember looking I'm like man that guy looks amazing, you know for for being 50 something years old He looks incredible. I'll never forget one day brought his card in I scanned it I looked at his birthday and I stopped him when I did the math Oh, I said come here. I said when's your birthday? I'm like is this is he using someone else's membership cards? What I thought he tells me the date and I'm like you're 74 years old He goes yeah, I'm like whole actually can I shake your hand? I shook his hand And he tells me a story of how he jack Lillain was somebody he followed and he exercised and he's like Yeah, I never abused drugs or alcohol and just something I really enjoy and you know I've done this for you know most of my life and I remember looking I'm going wow That's what healthy looks like. I don't think he'd ever be on a cover of a magazine But that's what healthy looks like then it happened again later on where there was this woman that would come in and work out And I don't know if you guys ever saw her She was at Santa Teresa and she would come in the morning and she was just like she was like five three Long silver hair So she's like total gray hair and she'd work out and she looked uh just very healthy and vibrant very vibrant energy whatever And I remember thinking what an attractive older woman She was also in her 70s when I met her and started talking about same thing. She's like, oh, yeah, you know I just this is just uh, I love being healthy. This is a part of my life She wasn't a fanatic whatever and I remember realizing like healthy looks like that It doesn't look like the extreme stuff that we see all the time Now the problem is also I definitely blame the fitness industry for feeding that but also blame the consumer because You buy you want to buy the super sexy fake looking person, right? We know we know what sells What sells is the extremes and we've lived through that, you know over and over again and uh to to sort of get people to uh understand that You know that isn't an extreme is a battle in itself and and you know, we've been so polarized on You know different ends on on anything that we you know any industry I think like they understand that to to show something that's way more extreme is shocking and it's going to get a lot More people to buy the magazine. Yes. So and there's a range of what that's why I don't know That's why I don't know if we ever win. Yeah, I don't think we'll ever show like just the portrayal like you're describing We gotta do we got to do a better job. You know, I still don't have to sell it better than I mean That's hard. I mean there there'll always be I think a space for for mind pump as far as as a business because of that There's a lot of people that want to learn or want that. So I think we're okay But as far as changing the whole industry like of course we we we thought we might do lofty gold I don't know, you know, and and when I think that when you're bringing up stuff like sports, like that's a that's a great example Like, you know, the truth is most people don't care that they're all steroid it up Most people don't care the cork and the bat are doing these crazy things because we want to see that We want to see as freakish and as crazy. I mean and bodybuilding is another example that look at how it's Pushed the envelope to these just unnatural unhuman monsters, but we still watch. We still want to be we still want to see it We're still intrigued by it Even if we all but there's not a lot of people that go like I would want to look like that A very small percentage say that but yet we all want to watch Yeah, and I remember reading the lifespan of a professional football player for the first time 55 Yeah, it's like I'm like what super depressing look at the lifespan of a pro NBA player It's also lower lower than the average, you know, uh, you know lifespan. So and by the way Health looks good in person Maybe not always in magazines and stuff and there's a there's a spectrum of that, right Healthy people have stretch marks. Healthy people are not super shredded often oftentimes healthy people don't look like Bodybuilders or models oftentimes sometimes they're leaner. Sometimes they're a little heavier Sometimes they're more muscular. Sometimes they're less muscular, but there is a spectrum within that But what typically is not in that spectrum is obesity Obesity all things being considered is just worse for you now You can still be generally healthy and be obese But if you were that same health or all those other factors the same and not obese your health would be better And your risk factors for disease and stuff like that would be lower Now the last one and this one is just uh, it's you know, we we have to talk about this all the time And that's that obesity is it's not because you're genetics Uh, now there are very small rare cases where this is the the case But for the vast in 99.9 of us, it's not your genes. We didn't evolve Uh with obesity. You know obesity was non-existent You know hundreds of years ago. It's it's actually a relatively new modern thing You can see the number of obese people how much it's exploded Since life has become so sedentary and since especially it's also attacking the the opposite person, right? It used to be a rich thing It used to be a thing that very true when you were very wealthy You had the luxury to buy that kind of food and eat that much food So you're the only people that could get fat. That's right And everybody else was had barely enough food to get by where now it's the complete opposite You're right now obesity affects the poor much more by the way It's not because they don't have access to Necessarily to good food because believe it or not They're even with processed foods. There are ways you could treat yourself and eat in a way that doesn't cause obesity It's mainly in education issues when people who tend to be Wealthier they tend to learn this kind of stuff and learn and see how to do it People and I know this I've worked in these situations. I've gone to schools. I've volunteered The kids just have no idea. Oh, this is chicken. You know, it's a it's a bucket of Kentucky fried chicken I thought that was healthy vegetables come from ketchup. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. So that's a real thing That's right. So but genetics are not the cause the reason why you see obesity in families Isn't because of the genetic by the way, you go back with those generational behaviors. It's behaviors You learn how to eat you learn how to treat yourself. You learn how to be active By the way, you grow up and by the way, this this is almost as hard as having genetics that make you obese Which like I said are extremely rare. It's almost as hard like you can't change your genetics. It's impossible, right? You all it's so hard to change behaviors that you grow up with It's it's so hard just to recognize those behaviors I remember when I realized that my family Yelled all the time. Yeah, I remember it was like it was like a like a what nobody talks this way I would have friends come over for dinner and then I remember them to get uncomfortable I'll be like, what's going on? I'm like, why is everybody yelling? I recognize and say with my Italian friend I go stay at his house and first thing in the morning I don't jump out of bed. Yeah, and I remember thinking like, oh wait, this is the way I was raised. Yes, it's a normal thing It's hard wire It's like stereotypes with food like Indian people eat Indian food Mexican people eat Mexican food Chinese people eat Chinese food It's like you take any of those people and you raise them in a different country and they eat that food Yeah, right. It's not because of their race. They eat that type of food I remember having to try to explain that to clients. It's like you have learned To love all those foods and you can reteach yourself to like other ones and you can break that cycle It's not you're not you're not born with it. It's not in your race. You've you've you've been developed insects Yeah, yeah, that's exactly. Yeah, and in fact if you take people Who are healthy and fit and lean and they live in like some of these like blue zones where people live a long time And you and you follow their their kids Let's say somebody, um, you know, you have someone right now that's living in sardinia This is one of the world's blue zones where people live a long time And then they have a kid and their kid moves to america That kid now has the same percentage chance of becoming obese as every other american Even though they grew up in this area where everybody's super healthy And I know there's scientists have studied this because they said what is it genetics? Or is it lifestyle that's making these people so healthy and they always come back and say It's the lifestyle. It's not I mean you take people from okinawa You take people who have descendants from okinawa who grow up in In in you know in america and they have the same chances Especially as the generations keep going as you become more you become more and more part of this Whatever this culture is that tends to cause obesity You see it become much more prevalent. So it's not a genetics thing at all and yes genetics play a role I want to say this too genetics play a role, but here's the fact about genetics So what you can't change it you can't control it. Why are we focusing on that right not to mention too The grass is always green on the other side with this genetic argument too Because it you know, there are people that are are born with you know, uh, typically a faster metabolism Or they would fall in the semano type of like an ectomorph body type versus a a mesomorph or an endomorph type of body type So, you know, which but here's the thing if you're uh an ectomorph So you're the really skinny body type like that's your genetic potential your genetics are you know Your body was more likely to be that way you have a much harder time building muscle Then the person who's the endomorph an endomorph that can build muscle easier Can actually potentially speed their metabolism up faster So yeah, they might have a harder time burning manually burning fat And so there's a little more challenge there, but then they have the advantage of being able to build muscle Which then also can turn can speed their metabolism. Well, I'll I'll take it a step further Let's say you are that ectomorph that that has a tough time building muscle You just don't build muscle very easily or not like your friend Who's this genetic freak in this you know mesomorph or whatever that builds tons of muscle But you stick to it you train yourself you learn that's right figure them You as the ectomorph you probably will know how to build muscle more effectively than your friend that it came to them easily I don't think I would have been as good of a trainer as I became if I was super genetically gifted I'll be honest with you a lot of stuff I had to figure out for myself too because it was really hard Muscle and fitness didn't come easy to me. It was something I had to really work hard towards So there's definitely you know pluses and minuses, but at the end of the day Here's the bottom line There's a choice that you have to make in life and that's this look You can either choose to focus on the things that you can't control Or you can choose to ignore those things and focus on the things that you can control Now does that guarantee you success? Does that guarantee you're going to win everything you try or guarantee that you're going to make tons of money or You know look super awesome or whatever. No, it doesn't guarantee any of those things But the odds that you'll do those things are far higher When you focus on the things you can control and ignore the things you can't so if you want to look at it like it's it's gambling What are my odds of being successful at whatever I do? What are my odds that I fail at everything that I do? The odds are far greater when you accept what you can't control and focus on what you can Look if you like mine pump head over to mine pump free calm check out all of our free content We got tons of free stuff that we give people. It's really great. Again. It's free. It's awesome You can also find all of us on instagram so you can find justin at mine pump justin me at mine pump salin adam at mine pump adam there's kind of a difference between Wanting and liking and what scientists who kind of study people it kind of discovered that When you get cravings for this food the wanting goes up, but the liking Doesn't necessarily go up. It can even go down. It's like we want this stuff and then we eat it and