 W E A F New York a pack of Avalon cigarettes, please. Yes, sir. Oh Just a moment sir. Don't forget your change. You'd never guess but Avalon's cost you less Good evening, Mrs. Del King saying welcome to Avalon time with Kurt Massey Edna still well Jeanette the Avalon chorus Bob strong in his orchestra and radio's redheaded ragamuffin Richard red skeletons Ladies and gentlemen if you want every penny you spend for your cigarettes to bring full value Then switch to Avalon cigarettes that give you more for your money. Yes The outstanding cigarette value on the market today Avalons are highest quality, but cost three to five cents less per pack than other popular price brands and Bear this in mind that saving of three to five cents means a reduction of as much as one-third of your total Cigarette expense and that amounts to many many dollars every year Now don't think you're sacrificing quality to gain Avalon's money-saving economy absolutely not Avalons are union made of a matchless blend of the world's finest Turkish and domestic tobaccos in fact you couldn't get finer quality tobaccos in any other cigarette regardless of price regardless of brand When any cigarette offers such definite advantages, it certainly deserves a trial So the next time try Avalon's the modern cigarette price to fit the time We present our carrot top commentator with his headline hokum Here he is that naughty nicey nutsy-nosey-nosey-nosehawk red children. Thank you very much and good evening ladies and gentlemen and now for the news Go follow Kansas a small-town dog catcher after five-year term in office loses his job Nothing left for the guy to do. He finally caught the dog Chicago, Illinois this week in Chicago is courtesy week in other words automobiles are not allowed to hit more than three pedestrians in one safety zone Now you think it's not tough on the pedestrians nowadays no kidding the only chance a pedestrian has nowadays is to be able to jump three ways at the same time Fashion news from Paris, France bustles will be worn this fall see my girl will be writing style and She ain't trying either The world in sports the National League Penet will go to the team that's good for the long pull in the American League long pulls don't count just the yanks Yesterday was ladies day over at the ballpark all the ladies got in for nothing I took Edna still well over there and it was funny so many people mistook us for sisters News from coast-to-coast colleague college scholarly college students and high school students prepare to go back to school See a good old college. I wonder what the kids will learn to eat this year. I Love school though five of the happiest years of my life. I spent in the fourth grade But after five years in the fourth grade they finally put me in the third News from the fields of medicine a man frozen in ice for five days has revived and he says that he feels no ill effect My uncle says we should do something for the guys who stayed boiled at law You know if they carry this freezing cure too far all the doctors will go out of business No kidding somebody gets a bum liver all they do is open up the icebox and say to the eggs and meat move over I Think that's enough news for the night So I'll scram out of here and let Jeanette sing my heart has wings singing pretty Jeanette, but pretty Slice of life things that happen in everyday life that you do and that I do in fact all of us do You set the scene will you tell right red well as the scene opens a young couple is found riding along the highway in an automobile It's a beautiful night Edna still well plays the part of the romantic young girls and red skeleton plays the part of the handsome young man handsome It's a very dark night folks Hey, can't this car go any faster? It can but I ain't going to get out and push it They ended a beautiful night. Shall we pause and look at the moon? Well look at the moon, but you keep your pause to yourself Isn't it romantic driving along the road here. We are all alone just you and me and the good humor men Oh, I think we're out of gas now. Don't give me that stuff Why ain't you got no money? Oh, it seems to be all right now there for a minute. I thought we're going to have a little siphon work What's that down the road? I didn't know looks like a couple of hitchhikers So we pick them up or shall we just whiz by and let them swear at us. I Don't know it's awful dangerous picking up strangers. Yeah, and besides I don't think they're hitchhikers What look at the dark night, and they aren't wearing neon thumbs. Yeah Well, maybe they're just beginners. I feel sort of sorry for them. Let's pick them up, huh? I gotta get that sound man face Say you want a ride fellas Make yourself at home Yeah, I hope it's comfortable back there for you. I wish you hadn't picked those guys up They look bad and did you see the balls that big one has under his arm? Yeah, I bet he buys these clothes the same place I do What can you expect for box tops? Listen don't worry just switch on the radio there Did you hear that yeah to escape convicts on highway 41 yeah, what highway is this it ain't the road to Mandalay I'll bet they're the convict look in the mirror and see what they're doing Oh, they're feeling around in their pockets. They're looking for the gun. Gee in a minute. You may be dead. I mean all together Look one of them reaching out he's paying say buddy. Have you got a match? Yeah? Oh, no, I mean yeah Yeah, here's a cigarette lighter. Just keep it. I got plenty more Have you got a cigarette? Yeah, she just moved in here's a whole pack I'm sorry. I don't have a carton Well, as I was saying bill before we picked up this ride the best killings are done Scientifically now this afternoon. I killed 11 of them and there wasn't a sound out of any of them. Oh Stop sticking out your tongue. That's not my tongue. That's my heart Well, don't let them know you're scared. I'm not scared. I'm just scared. I'm scared. I'm gonna get scared Well, if you're not scared you better call back your eyes. Yeah You take a knife like this and then with a quick stab. Oh sure sure it's quicker that way and they don't suffer so much Yeah, I'll bet it's more fun, too By the way, how would you like a big fat head? I think they're talking about you now Yeah, a couple of those trousseau murderers Boy this road getting darker and darker. Oh, there's a sign. This is 20 miles to Goslo boy You are scared 20 miles to Goslo. It's that speed limit 20 miles an hour. Go slow Look, and I'll try to talk them into letting you go free But I want you to know that I love you and I've only been untrue to you once you have Yeah, once I kissed the chorus girl on the forehead on the forehead. Yeah, she wasn't a chorus girl And besides I thought you were the one who never looked at another one now look here now look here list Don't fight. I want the last few minutes to be happy once Well, farewell my love. Oh look, there's a filling station. Yeah, you pull in there and I'll start yelling for help Yeah, and the guy'll probably run out and start wiping off the windshield Hey Bill, don't you think these people are acting rather funny? Yes, and did you notice the man looks just like the left key? I'll tap him on the shoulder and we'll introduce ourselves My good man, what's the trouble? Don't try to play innocent. We heard every word you said brother And about those 11 people you're power. Yeah, those 11 people you're power. I didn't kill 11 people Oh, you don't even tell them anymore, huh? You're clever criminals, but we heard every word you said just a minute. Hold on there fella. Here's my card Well, I'm Bill Green of the state animal husbandry and I'm here to show the farmers how to butcher their cattle Scientifically. Oh, yes, and I'm Parsons Smith. Oh, I beg your pardon Did you hear that? Can we do anything to repay you for your kindness? Yes, you can get me a glass of water my caveman just cave in Letting you keep up to date with the latest in cindillating rhythms Bob Strong and his orchestra present Bob's arrangement of Pavan Learned Chinese philosopher teaching said about Avalon cigarettes. Well, he said Tan and letters are gold Confucius says teaching in time was to in bush correction But in hand bad table manner correction Good thing come a little package avalan come a little package. You're never guessing they cost you lessing Yes friends teaching certainly knows what he's talking about Everyone can save money and plenty of money to by switching to avalan cigarettes Avalons cost three to five cents less per pack than other popular price brands And let me tell you you'll be surprised how fast that repeated saving on every pack will turn into important money Yes, many many extra dollars, but judging by the quality you'd never guess avalan's cost you less They're union made from extra choice extra select Turkish and domestic tobaccos Blended to perfection to give you cigarettes that are unsurpassed for real smoking enjoyment Just think outstanding quality exceptionally money-saving economy Truly avalan's are these cigarettes by of today. So the next time try a pack of avalan Here's Kurt Massey in the Avalon chorus to sing you a very beautiful song of a few years back It's still a great favorite When it's twilight on the trail. All right, Kurt we're waiting When it's Oh Need some help and need it bad. We'll send out skeletons. Here. We are in skeletons office where Edna still well assumes the duties of a secretary Hello, this is send out skeleton service the government's project is the WPA skeletons is the WPU What's that miss oh, you're getting married today and you want mr. Skeleton to come over and make your fiance jealous Are you sure you want mr. Skeleton? Oh, I see Boris Karloff was out Okay, he'll be right over what's this I got to go over and make a boyfriend jealous Yep, and does this make telephone history the first time anybody was connected with the party they called and still got the wrong number Listen now don't go around selling me short as a glamour boy. I've got more than I can handle What do you mean? Well the bride just quarreled with her groom and you're supposed to make him jealous enough to make him do his part in the wedding ceremony Another wedding a oh, I love wedding last June. I stood up for my uncle. You know the one that drinks so much He couldn't quite make it I Didn't think any self-respecting love bug whatever bites him well It don't bite him anymore. Just sort of gums him a little You know you should have seen how Red the bride's face was well, can you blame her for blushing look what she got? That was two months after the wedding before he found out that he's blushing bride with a nimbus But romance sure runs in our family. Well get going perpetual emotion. Yeah Well, I'm off to pitch a little voodoo Man must be a carapace. The sign says beware of dogs. I'll just ring the doorbell Well I'm the fellow you hear on the radio that goes out and make somebody jealous. I'm the one you send for Another boost for television Don't look now, but that man over there he and my daughter had a little spat. Well, congratulations a boy or a girl Oh Yes, he won't go through with the ceremony we planned so I'm afraid you'll have to help us out. I don't worry. I'll make him jealous Say, what do you think his boyfriend will do when he sees me and thinks I'm gonna marry your daughter? He'll probably come over and wring your hand off. Well, that's what Here's you she'll explain everything. Oh Cynthia. This is the man who's going to make Henry jealous. Yeah, how are you to it? Oh I'll make that guy so jealous. Oh, you don't look like it me jealous. Oh, no, I even made my own mother jealous Your mother. Yeah, she looks at me and gets jealous of other mothers Now if you don't want me, I'll just leave out of it Well, it's too late for last-minute changes my fiance refuses to go through the ceremony So you march with me and when he sees you you'll get jealous and rush over and insist on marrying me himself He will why I mean Now quiet Get ready. Well, I talked to the bridesmaid now. Let's see. I should have something old something new Something borrowed and something blue. I think that was the bridegroom. It just blew Don't be silly. That's Henry over there. Oh, isn't he distinguished looking? Yes, he is What makes him so distinguished looking probably those horn horn rim circles under his eyes Now shush, you wait here. Say dressmaker keep your eye on this specimen, but slightly sweetly nest Well, if it ain't gypsy rose leafy, please Please in the business addresses. I'm being known as Mrs. George Bernard Schwartz Say this year is a screwy setup here, ain't it? Oh, I think you'll make a lovely couple Yeah, that dumb that dame's fat enough to be a couple herself You know to marry hers on the border of Vigamate I ain't talking remember but at the last wedding because she was so fed they threw puffed rice And you make her dresses Well, certainly I'm confidentially is the first time I'm making a tent with shoulder straps That's sure as a funny-looking dress she has on tonight. What is it? That's the genuine scraped the shins With accordion pleats with the wheel stitching with the estate thing ham stitching I couldn't say I'm all flutter I'll go first. So watch out for my wedding gown now Are you nervous? Well, who who me me? Yeah, no, I should say not well then stop chewing on that cactus plant My last husband got an awful fright. Yeah, you're telling me. I mean Gee, I just stepped on your tail. I mean fail. Now you better walk with me. Oh Look at Henry. He has his eyes closed He can't bear to see me with some other man. Yeah, look at all those other guys smiling. I Bet they're bachelors Say Henry don't seem to be paying much attention to us. Don't worry. He well Just wait till we're pronounced man and wife. Yeah Well, I'll wait a minute Man and wife. Look, I can't look I got to go see a man about a wife I mean, I can't do it. I've got a child and nine small wives. I mean Listen if you embarrass my daughter in front of all these people I all right, okay, okay But just remember Okay, but I'll never well. Are you supposed to be the preacher? Well, I ain't Shirley Temple McPherson He's a parson. I should say so mr. Skeleton and am I ready to give your splice for life? But you can't do it her key. I just got a quiet quiet mr. Skeleton the ceremony must go on Now join hands. Now. Do you woman take this man? I do well if you're in such a hurry. I'll go faster And do you man take this woman for rich are richer for better or worse or for sick are sicker till death takes a holiday I'm most certain. Well, well, here's the ring mr. Skeleton Don't look her key. I can't do this thing say somebody else. Where's Elmer? Don't get excited mr. Skeleton. I'm not excited. I'm just a little well then for heaven's sake stop trying to put the ring in her nose But don't you see her key over goodness sake keep quiet. I now pronounce you man and wife two dollars, please. Oh I'm so thrilled kiss me. Is that necessary. I mean is it the kiss to marry to custom bride. I mean Not quite so soon and for goodness sake mr. Skeleton don't shake so much But her key I married me a married man and right when I'm in the prime of life, too Oh for goodness sake stop blubbering nothing happened. We both were hired as stand-ins at a wedding rehearsal. Oh Well, Del it looks like we're just about ready to tuck the show away for another week. That's right red Look, I don't want to mention any names But do you know that somebody around here actually believes that Marshall field is a playground your kid But you know, I've often wondered what they use those fields for myself Good night, red. Oh, I don't guess he knows either. Good night folks. I'll see you all next week Remember friends during the week when you asked for Avalon cigarettes Don't forget your change Yes, you'd never guess but Avalon's cost only 10 cents plus city or state tax Red Skeleton is appearing in person with Zazu Fitz and John Bowles at the Chicago Theater now and all next week through Thursday Be with us next Saturday evening at the same time when the Brown and Williamson Tobacco Corporation will again present Avalon time Del King speaking. Good night