Bob Lancer Parenting Solution 2: For Improved Child Behavior: Correcting Correctly





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Published on Mar 8, 2013

Children who receive too LITTLE responsiveness from their parents inevitably drift into trouble because they lack a sense of their healthy, responsible boundaries.

A common parenting mistake is to overlook a child until his or her behavior becomes too outrageous to ignore, and then to react with too much harsh, impatient criticism.

You begin teaching children boundaries when you refuse to give-in to a demand that the child expresses.

The correct time to establish boundaries is when your child demonstrates that he or she cannot responsibly handle more freedom.

For instance, if a young child is too physically aggressive with other children, supervise this child closely with other children. The moment he or she appears to become antagonistic or too physical, step in kindly but firmly to prevent the act of physical aggression.

If a child speaks disrespectfully, respond in a way that DEMONSTRATES respectfulness while pointing out that disrespectful speech is unacceptable.

Children also need a great deal of POSITIVE responsiveness to keep their behavior on track and to feel good enough about themselves and their lives to make caring choices.

We therefore have to pay close attention to children to recognize:
• When they need our positive, loving interaction and appreciative feedback
• When they need us to respect their space and give them freedom
• When they need us to step in to establish boundaries

Children DO need our direction and our correction at times. But if we do not direct and correct CORRECTLY we end up inciting more behavior problems than we solve.

To recognize WHEN and HOW to establish boundaries with your child, pay attention to your child BEFORE child behavior drifts too far off track to ignore.

You will soon find yourself accurately anticipating where your child is headed and choosing the response your child needs from you to behave beautifully.


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