 Let's talk Hey curl friends, I'm beyond grenade you watching beyond grenade today and today We're gonna have a little bit of a curl talk and today's curl talk discussion has been inspired by this post that I found on Instagram That reads please Stop straightening your child's hair for special occasions It's sending them the message that when it's time to look special You need straight hair and that goes for grown women too You will look just as beautiful with your hair in its natural form. You're welcome kissy face preach this message Is so important if you guys already follow me on Instagram you probably saw this post you guys are leaving me Hundreds of comments, so it's getting a really good response And I'm kind of just like amped up today as you might have seen from my Instagram stories If you guys recognize what I'm wearing. It's just one of those days But I thought we should further the conversation here on YouTube for my YouTube fans that you guys are much larger than my Instagram fam Not that I'm saying you guys need to really come over to Instagram and kind of even out those numbers would be great But yeah, you really should follow me on Instagram because that's where we get deep into all these topics that I can't Always respond to on YouTube and you should be watching my stories every day So uh follow me at Miz Beyond Grenade so we can take a relationship to the next level So let's talk about straightening your hair for special occasions. What are special occasions? Your own wedding attending someone else's wedding prom winter formal Homecoming maybe your birthday Maybe something at your job. I don't know whatever excuse you guys like to come up with I don't do that Now obviously it's your hair. You could do what you want, but that's not the problem here the problem here is that little mindset of Okay, this is now more special because it's straight maybe more beautiful because it's straight that is a Toxic mentality that lives in the subconscious of your mind And it just grows and grows and grows and it grows because of society the media Maybe your co-workers maybe people making fun of you at school all those things add to that negative thought and that just grows Inside of you until the point where you just hate The curls that are growing out of your head and then you're like 20 30 40 years old and now you have to big chop and cut off all of your hair and Start from scratch and just start to learn how to love your curls like It's just so much work That is rooted at a young age so that's a message to maybe someone that has straight hair that has curly kids or Maybe you are the person struggling with rocking your natural curls And now you have kids that have curly hair and they're looking at mom with straight hair like well I want hair like mommy and you're pressing your hair every day, too Obviously you are a grown woman You probably won't even watch in this video because you're not about to take advice from some random girl on YouTube But it is encouraging and inspiring for them to look up to someone that they love that also Looks like them. So if you have straight hair, I'm not saying go out and get a perm but You know subconsciously kids are growing up looking for role models And that's why I love when there's curly kids in cartoons or curly characters on TV shows or in movies Or in magazines or an ad the more that a kid grows up in the environment to where they look and can relate like someone else That is what you need to surround them with so you really just have to start instilling that confidence in who they are With their natural hair so that doesn't stick with them as they grow up now for us older people Let's talk about weddings now my husband and I dated for four Speaking of my husband Yes, darling. I am hungry. What do you feel like? I don't know. What do you feel like? anyways Husband and I dated for four years and then we were engaged for one and throughout that whole time. He's always seen me like this Curly hair big hair. Why would I all of a sudden on the most important day of our relationship? Try to straighten my hair and then look like someone that he's never seen before when I have straight hair people Literally don't recognize me. One of my closest friends literally walked right past me. Oh No, not today. You gonna see me. So yeah, I want him to look at me and recognize me and Know that that's what he's gonna be looking at for the rest of his life Now for those of you in school, when do you want to straighten your hair for prom homecoming winter formal? Okay, I just posted a video on really cute curly hairstyles that you can wear to prom or winter formal Or wherever you're going and it's really easy to do so So I'll make sure to link that video up here and down below to you guys to check that out But story time I actually straighten my hair for my winter formal. I didn't do a good job It was like that fluffy straight not like bone straight because I like to dance and then I therefore would sweat The back of my curls. Well straight hair Was getting wet. Therefore. I was starting to transform. Okay, my straight pieces were like I was like the Hulk But turning back into my curly natural form so I ran to the bathroom and I was like Mordified I just remember I kept staying in there. I was just so embarrassed You don't want to sweat out your straight hair when it's curly. It does not matter No one can tell I little remember thinking like maybe I should just dunk my head in the sink and just have wet curls for the rest of the dance I Was so mad at myself for straightening my hair and I don't want any of you guys to have to deal with the Hulk Transformation on the dance floor another important thing that is so important is like media and TV and movies That's why I get so excited when I see a curly hair actress in a show or a curly kid Cartoon or those curly hair kids books that I found that I did a full video on and someone like Viola Davis Winning. What was it an Oscar and she wore her hair like big into a fro? It's Viola Davis can rock her fro and that's good enough for the Oscars. I Think your hair curly is good enough for your cousin's wedding. What do you say? Oh about that someone else's wedding if you are a bride I Know it's your day and you're gonna get what you want But it's kind of insulting to ask your curly bridesmaids to straighten their hair. I Know you want them all to look the same But there's probably a good chance that your curly friend is a different ethnicity than you So I mean if she's black and your white she's not gonna look the same anyways But it's just kind of a hard-ass you don't know what she's been going through with her curls She might be trying to transition and this one time of her straightening her hair could set her back She literally might have to miss the rehearsal dinner because she's gonna have to go home and straighten her hair So if you are in that situation, maybe you're the bridesmaid watching Invest in a straight wig. They're amazing. You throw them on no heat damage easy peasy And then you're like, yeah, I straighten my hair for you and it's like a done deal I am a strong advocate of wearing a wig over straightening your actual curl pattern If you're someone that likes to switch up their hair every now and then that's fine I have no problem with that. Maybe you straighten it like once a year because you just want to Whatever what I do have a problem with though is that if you're straightening it because you don't think you're beautiful I have a problem with that if you're straightening it for a length check Girl, if you don't just pull that mess down look length check three you're straightening your hair because of someone else because People are bullying you at school because your boyfriend is telling you you look better. We're straight here That's a whole other can of worms, I don't think we have time for you're doing it to get a job I mean that's something I really have control of I don't know if you even really want to work in an environment that Would literally not choose you because of your hair. That's kind of a red flag an environment that I personally wouldn't want to work in But you know, I'm not really in the corporate world. If this is your dream job and that's what you're gonna have to do to get the job Okay, maybe you'll get the job, but are you gonna straighten your hair every day for work? I don't know that seems Seems a bit much So overall the moral of the story that I stated in my instagram caption is that this is not a straight versus Curly thing. I have no problem with straight hair and I love rockin a straight wig that you will actually see in this weekend's video But I do have a problem with the battle of you Versus yourself love if you do not love The hair that is coming out of your head and you think that the only way you are going to succeed Or look beautiful or get hired or get a boyfriend Whatever Is if you have straight hair That is just Incorrect That's just a really negative way of thinking that I don't want you to fester in Ever or for much longer. I know curly hair can be complicated. I know it gets frizzy But that's why I spend So much time making videos every single week to help you guys and I'm not the only youtuber Obviously, there's so many Great natural hair bloggers that have wavy hair Similar hair to mine or curlier hair that will give you their tips to help you succeed Let's keep this curl top going. Let's expand the conversation to the comment section down below One did you wear your hair natural or curly for your wedding? If you didn't do you wish you did? If you are going to get married Do you plan to if you are someone in school who has prom or homecoming or whatever coming up? Are you going to keep your hair curly for the dance? If so, tell me why if not Tell us why if you were bridesmaids in someone's wedding and you kind of dealt with this situation of a very Adamant bride about straightening your hair. How did you handle the situation? Leave all your stories and comments below so we all could help each other out So we don't continue to stay into a society that is making us believe that only straight hair is beautiful And or better. We must stop this cycle now So that the youth of this generation can grow up with more confidence and more education on their hair Instead of growing up with relaxers and low self-esteem If you are new to my channel, welcome. I hope this wasn't eye-opener for you. Make sure you give me a thumbs up and subscribe I have so many videos to help you guys if you are new to your curly hair journey I have a curly hair 101 video. I have a big chop video. I have the best deep conditioners video I have how to find a good curly hair salon video. I have a hair styles video Everything you need to know is pretty much in my curly hair playlist. My videos are here to help So once again, make sure you follow me on instagram at Ms. Bianca Renee So you guys can get daily tips throughout the week. Watch my instagram story So you can get the behind the scenes on what's going on in the curly hair community And I hope to see you guys next time. Thanks for watching Bianca Renee today