 people will ask me, you know, Robert, you know, the title of your book, No More Mr. Nice Guy, has that gotten pushback? Has that gotten blowback? I said, really, it hasn't. I think my publishers hoped it would. But it really didn't happen. And but the book has still done very well anyway, in spite of not getting initial, you know, blowback. But yeah, the title, if you think about it, you know, if you just get real logical with it, why would somebody write a book teaching men to be not nice? There's enough not nice men out there. And we don't need a book to teach more men to be nice. And and of course, one thing that I found, especially in men, but especially in nice guys, is real black and white thinking. We think, well, if we're not this, we're that there's only there's only the two alternatives. And so we think, well, if I'm not the nice guy, you know, if I'm not the the pleasing, caring, avoid conflict, you know, try to treat everybody nice guy, the only alternative is be the asshole jerk, you know, be be like, you know, those those those a-holes that, you know, what we don't want to be like and that we all we've heard women complained about all our life. So that's what we get to thinking. Well, that's the only alternative. Now, the whole first chapter, well, maybe second chapter, but early on in No More Mr. Nice Guy, I talk about what is wrong with being a nice guy. Because yeah, like me, I thought, why wouldn't everybody want to be like me? I'm a nice guy. And the there's a there's a lot of side effects of being a nice guy, with perhaps the most significant one is that nice guys are in authentic, which means they're not honest. And which is really a big surprise to most nice guys, because we think, I don't tell lies. But do you tell people what you really feel, what you really think, what you really want, do you let them see the real you? Are you a what you see is what you get kind of person? Are you a lick your finger up and hold it, see which way the wind's blowing and then go that? Are you different with this group of people than you are with that group of people? Are you a chameleon? If all those apply, you're not honest. Because honesty just means you are who you are. And people get to see who you are and know what you feel and know what you think and know where you're going and know what's important to you and know you have wants and know you have needs. And you communicate them clearly. And and you're not you have no shame about that. But nice guys have shame about all of those things. So again, we're chameleons. And going back to, you know, my second wife said, you got, you know, if you don't go get some help, I'm going to leave you. And really, just what she was saying is your nice guy stuff. Yeah, everybody thinks you're nice, but your nice guy stuff's coming out and he's really indirect ways that are hurtful. You know, the passive aggressive behavior. And again, the victim puke try would just let my resentments build up for my second wife gave that name to that where I would just, you know, they would build up until finally something, you know, and I would just blow up all those little conversations I'd been rehearsing in my head, you know, staying awake at night. Oh, I'm going to say this, I'm going to say that all of it would come out, right? All of it would come out. And it wasn't pretty. And I remember the, you know, from time to time, my then wife would say, how long has this been bothering you? I go, six months, year, maybe. And she would say, did it ever cross your mind to tell me this was bothering you? And I think and I go, no, actually it never crossed my mind. I rehearsed plenty of conversations in my head, but I never thought to say to you, Hey, this is bothering me. Can we talk about it? Can we address it? Can we work on it? Because I just assumed if I did that, you know, she'd go ballistic. She wouldn't want to talk about anything that might be bothering me, especially if it was related to her behavior. But that's not about her. That was my stuff. So that's just interpersonal stuff where nice guy stuff comes out. But I've got an online class I've been teaching for 20 years. In fact, Barnes & Noble had me develop it when my book was just coming out called nice guys don't finish last they rot in middle management. And because because nice guys, you know, in the workplace, I say nice guys are often good at being good, but not great at being great. You know, we're pleasing enough and conscientious enough, we want to do a good enough job to get that external approval and validation. But to really be willing to risk, to take a chance, to rock the boat, to focus on what's important to you, to live with your passion, to follow your purpose. Most nice guys won't do that. So, you know, we do well enough, but often, you know, not great. And I've had to deal with that. I mean, I've done well enough in life. And sometimes, you know, over the last, let's say, you know, five to 10 years, I have to pinch myself because I can't believe my life is so damn good. And the reason it's gotten so damn good is that I am taking risks. I am going for what I want. I am recruiting people to help me get the things done. And you know, it's a whole different paradigm. And I'm not getting codependent and wasting a lot of time fixing everybody else's problems or solving their stuff, which that's a big thing that happens in the workplace and in relationship for nice guys, they get codependent. And we'll invest a lot of time and energy on other people's issues or problems when we could be investing that time and energy in what's more significant for us.