 Number one, the every other weekend single mom who doesn't want more kids. So like every single mom on every dating site will talk about their shared custody. That's right. They put this stuff right on their bio. They'll say things like, me and my ex have the every other weekend custody situation, or me and my ex have the every other weekend visitation situation or whatever it is, right? And there's an option that they can check off, like a little check mark box that says that they have kids and they don't want more. How convenient for her, right? She wanted kids like a few years ago, but she doesn't want them now. She don't want them with you, right? The new guy. That just brings like so much to the table. And she does it every other weekend thing, you know, where the baby dad gets the kids like two weekends out of the month. And the mom has them like every weekday. So that basically translates to the single mom being free of her kids for two full days a month, which in turn translates to if you date her, you get two nights a month with her. And that's tops. That's considering if everything goes smoothly and you're lucky. Two freaking nights a month. Go ahead and scratch Sundiopolis because she has to pick them up on Sunday. You know, and the baby dad probably lives like a hundred miles away or whatever. And go ahead and cross Friday off the list because she's too tired and she has to work on Friday and she's stressed out. And if there's no Joey fevers and the baby dad didn't sabotage the situation, you get like two Saturday nights a month with her. Geez. That's a bargain. And number two, the multiple baby daddy single mother. Okay, these chicks are really good at making poor decisions. Not only did they make one bad mistake, but they make two or three. And they never learn from their mistakes too. All three of their baby dads are going to be the same type of dudes. They're all going to be classified as losers. Okay. You'll never find a scenario where it's baby dad number one, loser. Baby dad number two, loser also. Baby dad number three, part-time college professor and financial banker, right? It just ain't going to happen. All her baby daddies will be Jesse's, guaranteed. Take it to the bank. Number three, the prison baby dad single mother. Okay, so when this guy's finally free, where the hell do you think he's going to go? Do you think he's going to take a trip to BG? Do you think he's going to go to Timbuktu? No, he's going to go straight to his kid and baby mama's house, okay? You see, when they release inmates, they try to put them in the custody of the family members. And guess who this guy's family is? The chick you're dating and her kid. And you live with her now. So, good luck with that. Number four, the recovering single mother. She's found Jesus. She's in a rehab facility. She's done a lot of stuff in the past, right? But that's all behind her now. And besides having a kid with a deadbeat, she's made a few bad decisions in her life. But she's on the road to recovery. She's got a job now. She goes to church. She attends double A meetings, right? But, honestly, she is just one wine taste away from returning to that lifestyle. One little tiny buzz off a drink. And next thing you know, she's snorting up again, right? These chicks are very, very fragile. So please proceed with caution. And number five, the mom with multiple boys over 10. Okay, so if a single mom has three boys and their ages are like 11, 13, and 15, that's got to be one heck of a stressful environment. These kids are starting to get fascinated with, like, lighting things on fire, breaking windows, and vandalizing. They're at the age where they want to skip school, and they want to start smoking pot in the backyard. You name it. Boys are much more difficult to raise than girls. I promise you this. Girls are not out there doing danger like lighting off firecrackers. And the worst that girls do is play with their Barbies and have tea parties with their stuffed animals. You know, it's the boys doing all the devious, dangerous, so... Yeah. If you find yourself in a situation where you all of a sudden have to raise three boys of this age, good luck with that. So to basically sum this up, the worst single mother that you could ever find out there would be a single mom in her mid-40s with multiple prison-baby dads. And all our kids are boys between the ages of 10 and 15, and she was in a rehab facility, and they do the every other weekend thing, right? So basically, the best single mother you could find, if it even exists, is a single mom in her 20s who has one daughter around the age of seven and whose father is either A, no longer alive, or B, a millionaire. But, uh, good luck finding that...