 that come. Tony Gaskins here. Let me see. Let me get this situated here. I want to pop in now. When I'm able, I try to do a bonus live at noon Eastern on Saturdays whenever I'm able. So there's not a set. There's not a set live. I don't do this all the time. There's not a set live, but when I'm able, I go live at noon on Saturdays to do an additional Q&A. And then on Saturdays, sometimes I do one at noon and one around 7 p.m. or something like that. I don't know if I'll be able to do that night depending on when me and my wife date night is tonight. But yeah, I might be able to go live again tonight at 7 p.m. Get some of the questions. Hey, TT God bless you. God bless. I appreciate that. So yeah, y'all here early. If you got a question that you've been wanting to ask and you didn't get answered, go ahead and put your hashtag Q or hashtag. Just put hashtag Q. You ain't got the right hashtag question. So I'll see it because you know, once we get going, it's they crank on up sometimes and I can't see everything. And if you still have not got a woman's influence, make sure you get, I think you could listen to it for free on Audible if you try that free trial. I don't think that benefits us at all, but I some audible doing so I don't know if they paid a publisher for everybody they let listen to the book for free. I don't know how that works, but I think you listen to it for free on Audible. Okay. Thank you. Jermaine for watching that small business video. Yeah, y'all catch that I posted, but it just kind of finished processing around the same time I was about to go live. So they kind of stepping on each other toes. Ashley, let me see at what point should we tell our families about each other or the relationship? Well, you do it based on your family. You shouldn't do it at the same time if y'all families are different. So if you got one of those families that they just they want to meet everybody you talking to, even if you just been talking to them a few months, then you can introduce them because some families want to know like me when I get to that point, I'm not gonna mind meeting a hundred different girlfriends. I'm not gonna mind if that's how many women he got. My son's have to date to find V1. Like my son say he want to save himself till marriage. So he want a woman that's saving herself. So he may have to go through a hundred women till he find that one. But I want to know who you talking to just so I could read it and tell you if you wasting your time. And then also just in case she want to, you know, chop you up, put you in somebody's freezer. I know where to look at. And so some families like that, you introduce them soon. If your family like don't bring nobody around here until you talking about marriage, then you do that. But typically whichever one that should be inside of 12 months. How do men view a woman's insecurity during dating? Joanna, God bless you. God bless you. How come some men married women who are not so smart? Thank you. That's just men who not smart. Jermaine, Thomas, God bless you. I appreciate you. I appreciate it. Let me see. I had a question up here that I was on. Yes, some men don't want a wife. Some men want a lapdog. And that's what you got to realize. How do men view a woman's insecurities? If it's a real man, he kind of want to help fill those voids. He want to speak life into those voids. He want to help build you up. If it's a grown boy, it's something that he's going to play on this. He use that to his advantage. He know he can get over in certain ways because of those insecurities. So it just depends on if it's a grown boy or a grown man. What does it mean when a guy says he's scared of you yet continues to come around? It's just flattering. He's not scared of you. He's just trying to flatter you. It's just conversation. He's just saying, you know, he trying to flatter you, make you smile, make you laugh. So you'll drop your guard. And then also he knows whatever joke is 50% true. So with him saying that, he knows that that may make you, if you want a husband, that that may make you kind of back down off of some of your standards and kind of chill out and relax a little bit. My ex and I remain friends for months after our breakup. I told him I felt like he used me as an emotional crutch because of the situation. So I ended our friendship abruptly. Was I wrong? No, you weren't wrong. You were right. And that's exactly what he was doing. If a person can't be with you, then go on about your life. Go on about your life because once you're gonna try to be romantic and it don't work out, you can't be friends with a past lover because it's just gonna block your blessings. Rocks to God blessing, blessing, pardon our life, blessing in favor to you. Thanks for the wisdom. Hey, God bless you, pardon our life. I have a situation. Someone I'm interested in from the past wants me to be one of many wives. He's wasting all our time. You shouldn't be giving that no thought and you and you must not know me. You're wasting all our time with that question. You'll be slap crazy to be one of many wives. So whatever you got to do right now for yourself, you got to get you some baby powder and put it in your hand and slap yourself until you wake up. If you got to cut your toenails, if you got to drop a hammer on your foot, whatever you got to do to wake up and smell the Folgers, that's what you're gonna have to do because you'll be out your mind to entertain a fool talking about be one of many wives. Tony, could you give a word for those who are struggling with celibacy? Now, see, listen, you have to read your book, okay? Because I teach against what I did. I got married. You know, if you a woman, then you waiting to meet your husband so you just can't go pick your wife. See, man, we we could go find our wife because we the ones that's out here as a woman. You could go pick your husband, but if he don't want you, now you like, whoa, what's going on? So listen, you're gonna have to get in your celibacy support group. Maybe some one of y'all got one on Facebook. You will have to read you some books. There's some books out there on celibacy. It's some blogs. Get the new knowledge and you're gonna have to stay prayed up because you know me, I went and I got married because I couldn't, I couldn't last too long like that. I was too loose. T.T. God bless you. Bless you, T.T. for a little life. How to go about republishing an updated version of an old book that is no longer in print. If, if, if you take my birth, your book program, that'll be the best way to go because it'll save you a lot of money because it was $100. It was 97. I made it 47. So it's 50% off because author consulting with myself is $2,500 and other author consultants I know charge like 5,000. So the best way is to just take that course and it'll walk you through real quick at the end of it, what sites to use, how to get your formatting. You just basically just gonna reformat it. You're gonna retitle it. You're gonna get a new cover design and then you're gonna publish it. Real simple process. You just got, you just gotta go to them right sites and choose which sites you're gonna publish through. You got KDP.Amazon.com, KDP, write that down, KDP, Kindle Direct Publishing. You got KDP.Amazon.com. You could publish through them. You could publish your print book. They're distributed and you could publish your Kindle, your e-book. Then if you want to publish to all the other e-readers, you could use bookbaby.com. I use bookbaby.com. But before that, you just gotta get your new ISB in and you gotta get your book formatted and your new cover. And so those things, you could do a lot of that on Fiverr. Fiverr.com. Just wanted to send a blessing today and thank you for what you do. Ashley Beverly, God bless you. God bless you. I felt like I missed somebody up there. Let me see. Okay Luciana, they move yours. See when y'all put that $4.99 and all of that, they are deleted from up there. I don't know why they hate on y'all. You know, a blessing is a blessing, but they deleted it and I miss it and it get lost in the chat. So y'all forgive me on that. And so for those of you who put the big blessings, forgive me if I get those $4.99 first because the bigger ones, they stay up there longer. After how long do you recommend going to a man's house you're dating? Luciana, God bless you. Thank you for that blessing. Um, I wouldn't go to a man house inside of 10 dates. So 10 real dates. I know about the dates should be at least two hours long. That'll be the minimum that I would recommend because you need to see if this Ted Bundy nephew, you really need to see how he moved and vibe. You gotta be watching even when you leave the date to make sure he not following you. So you need to go on 10 real dates and on these dates, don't let him pick you up. I saw one lady say, let him pick you up for your homegirl house. I'm like, that don't make no sense because why are you gonna put your homegirl under that or in that ish if the man craze? Now he's showing up at her house. Now he's gonna take her hostage to get you. Hold her ransom. So don't ever let a man pick you up. Whether you got to take the bus train or plane, you get there yourself and then you get home yourself. And then when you feel like you really really know him and make sure you're not desperate. So at least 10 dates, then you can consider having him over for an in-house date and those need to have like an 8 p.m curfew to be honest with you otherwise you're gonna be on your bite. K. Y. God bless you. Or Kai. I'm only K. Y. Going the wrong way. Kai will say Kai. Hi Tony. Should I send my ex who I'm still cordial with your your ex who you court? Can a man be faithful video? I believe it will help him but don't want to oh yeah that's your ex. That's your ex. You send him anything you want to send him. That's your ex. So you really you don't want to be sending me a video when it's about to be your next because you don't want to be throwing another man in his face but your ex you ain't with him he need to grow it don't matter what he think if he get butt hurt over that okay and but so yeah he might not wash it he might not watch it but you know you still got to send it to him. Sold him by God bless you. Pour it in life. Tony the man that left me smoked weed, vaped said Shilvery is dead doesn't want to get married I never rush any of that because I'm young he's young as well we're both 20 should I be upset that he dumped me no no you ought to be doing a dance you ought to be doing a rain dance you ought to be doing the the cha cha slide the two six slide everybody slide that you that is the biggest blessing in your life to date that a man like that left you but understand this a man like that don't try to circle back around so be very careful that you don't made your decision that you moving on with your life because he coming back he coming back Akilah God bless you pour it in our life dated a guy for three months everything was going well and then he disappeared after I sent his daughter flowers as a sign of compassion for her mom's death nine years ago what do you call that uh yeah Akilah yeah you did the most you did the most you did the most because listen you dated a guy three months you don't know him like that it's three months you sent his daughter flowers as a sign of compassion for her mom's death nine years ago so for one three months you don't know him two three months you don't know his daughter three you sending flowers bringing back up something that she trying to get past it's from nine years ago so you bring it back up but she don't know you like that so that's like posting that your family member died on twitter and then a bunch of strangers say sorry about your loss they don't do nothing for you because you know they ain't sorry about your loss they say sorry about your loss and they next tweet they they joking so he know you don't care about him he know you don't care about his daughter and if you did if you didn't ask him could you do that and you don't know what type of feelings that's gonna stir up in his daughter you were doing the most you were doing the most that what that was you you just overstep your boundaries when you come in you can't try to come in as superwoman and you know missave them and trying to be step mama and and all of that so you got to pump your brakes you got to move a little slower so that's really why he could have got ghosts but he probably was spending leave anyways and that just was the you know the icing on the cake man hold on he questioned coming Sabrina God bless it only just wanted to pop in and give a blessing a thank you having exam do at four today so can't stay god bless you thank you so much for writing the woman's influence a god bless you god bless you let me grab this one asia last year when is it okay to allow yourself to fall in love with a man for one you can't stop yourself for falling in love and then to you can't allow yourself to fall in love if you're gonna fall in love you're gonna fall in love here's the thing you could fall in love in a month you could fall in love in three months the question is when should you tell a man you in love you never tell a man that you in love with him until you know for a fact that he's in love with you that's when you tell him it don't matter when you fall in love because most women gonna fall in love before a man but to be honest with you it take me and it take me and one or two years to fall in love just because how we built so if you go to telling a man you love him three months in six months in you setting yourself up the goddess k god bless you god bless you played question game he got all the answers wrong things you should know after a year of dating says men don't pay attention to things like that b day am i over writing no you're not over reacting at all you're not over it he told my men don't pay attention what kind of men he talked about you and me i got i can show you in my phone right now what size shoe my wife wearing all the different brands because they all fit different you know i got i put them in all the different little design of shoes whether she a 39 or whether she a 40 whether she a eight and a half eight nine nine and a half and and i knew that in the first year and and what uh colors she liked where she grew up what she won't if he don't know your birthday because you put b day he don't know your birthday yeah you went the wrong man and and the thing is he not paying attention to your details he paying attention to somebody else details just because i bless your heart's on the things for all your wisdom what's your opinion on a man who says you are important to me that's why i keep you to myself i feel like i'm all he has if he said that and you feel like that then that might be true it's only good if it feel good if it feel good and it feels safe now if you feel isolated if you feel like you want to island then that's a bad thing that's dangerous so you got to pump your brakes don't be happy don't be too happy to be needed now because a man because a man need to need he need to have something else and okay you say it doesn't if it if it don't feel good then you need to run you need to run because a man like that that mean what that mean in manglish if i can't have you nobody can what that mean in cold is you try to leave me baby we're gonna be a lifetime movie you know lifetime movie network and see this the thing with those kind of guys now the longer you stay the worse you make it as soon as that's why i always say i got a quote that say recognize crazy early what that mean is as soon as you recognize that crazy get up out of there because a lot of women play with it you play with it a year two years three years and they end up losing their life for that they do not entertain no crazy man um nicky god bless you god bless your part in our life lord good afternoon bless tribe my ex-husband asked me about sending him half of the stimulus money when i receive it but he doesn't come see his child nor sins in monetary support am i wrong for saying no you absolutely not wrong for saying notice them going to who take care of the child what are you talking about man you slap crazy what i would have sent him my ice pack and say here this for your head where you hit your head at i'm sorry that you fell and bumped your head but here go this ice pack that's what i'll send them with with five hundred dollars in monopoly money that's what i'll send them man you crazy don't come right me talking about saying you have for the stimulus when you ain't did half and and you way over there under another sticky booty woman and then you want to write me talking about seeing you have looking like who shot john and forgot to kill him oatmeal question a god bless you oatmeal oatmeal okay i don't know if i said that right but a god bless your question been single for over two years i've been meeting me in 35 to 45 years old let's say they've never been in love i could believe it should i continue to date know him or is that a red flag thanks for all you do there's not a red flag is it is coming and um that's why i try to tell y'all men don't really fall in love men don't really fall in love like when a man fall in love that's his wife for the rest of his life so if you know who you are then you could be the first woman that he falls in love with like my when i fell in love with my wife i realized that the hundred dates i went on the hundred women i had dated before her i never loved i realized i've never loved until i love my wife and so when when a man fall in love he's gonna let go of that love he gonna make that work he's gonna do what he gotta do he gonna make that work so yeah they're right they have never loved if they're still single and available jeal ivy god bless you hyton are you going live later tonight i'm gonna try but see me and my wife we doing a um del frisco doing a thing where you pick up your charcuterie now i don't know why they name that thing charcuterie because where i'm come from where i come from that is too close to what you call but they call it a charcuterie or something but it really chees and meat on the board y'all know what i'm talking about so me and my wife picking up one of those from del frisco and they do some wine and cheese and um now jesus drank wine i really don't jesus drank wine when he hit y'all mouth but um i don't know what time our date tonight if our date is going to be at nine when we put the boys down for bed then i'm gonna go live at seven but if our date end up being round seven then i might have to go live nine nine thirty but i plan to but gia god bless you god bless you i will purchase your life coach course as soon as i post this question hey god bless you make sure you use the coupon code my mentor if you don't god bless you too and if you forget to use the coupon code just count it just count it all joy if you go to get the life code certification and you don't hit cute it's going to say have a coupon you enter my mentor if you forget to use it just count it all joy count it all joy count it to you as your tides and offering and keep on going keep on going don't write tell my oh can i have a refund because i forgot to use the code no god bless you the more you sold the more you're going to reap just change the way you see it but pay attention and use the coupon code if you signed up for the life code certification baronica god bless you should should talk to my ex after he broke up with me when i found his instagram page full of new ladies we have not spoken for one year now last night he texts me he loves me out of the blue he hurt me deeply no you should not talk to him you should not talk to him see that's what i got a video here maybe search search um tony gaskin's black book syndrome i think i call it the black book syndrome now this is something i made up now it's a name i made up um but it's talking about how when me and move on in their life and they circle back around later when when things get boring they realize they upgrade was a downgrade undrear god bless you undrear chair pour out of your life so no don't deal with it don't don't don't deal with it keep it going speech is speech god bless you baby daddy make me feel guilty in and out my life in and out my life now let me ask y'all a question now okay when y'all write these questions every now and then you know they drop a little period in there so i could because they it'll confuse me sometimes y'all don't drop no period in there they drop a little period in there every now and then baby daddy make me feel guilty in and out my life for two years went on a date with friend don't know his friend before baby says he was coming to stay that i messed up and ruin what we could have had feeling guilty i ruined a fam for son uh speech is speech um y'all give me a second with this question right here because i you was typing fast trying to get it up there now see listen when you send that blessing they give you all the time you need to type the question okay so you know maybe if you are part of the blessed tribe type it again and put it in the um put it in the chat so i could read it again but i'm trying to make it out y'all give me one second let me read this one more time baby daddy making you feel guilty okay he's in and out of your life for two years okay that's a red flag in and out for two years that mean you standing still went on a date with friend now i don't know if you say you went on a date with his friend or or he went on a date with his friend don't know his friend or didn't know his friend before the baby before the baby okay this your baby daddy you know his friend before y'all had a baby says he was coming to stay that i messed up and ruin okay okay feeling guilty i ruin a fam for your son okay you ruin a family the chance of having a family for your son well i'm gonna need uh alex for 500 yeah okay i got you now listen to me anytime somebody run in and out your life that mean you standing still that's a red flag nobody should ever run in and out your life they could run in or they could run out but don't leave the door open like your grandma used to say you're gonna stay in or you're gonna stay out you y'all stay your butt in or stay your butt out but don't keep running inside and outside of my house my condition you running up my bill and so you got to take that same approach to a relationship in or out the other thing is you did not ruin your family for your son you didn't ruin the chance of a family for your son because that man won't gonna never be there what he's doing he dangling this over your head to make you feel guilty for trying to live and have a have a life and you going on dates so that's all lies it's all lies and manipulation dr gary chatting calls the manipulation by guilt try to make you feel guilty remember that what you just said you said i feel guilty try to make you feel guilty to manipulate you into doing what he wants you to do andrea i said god bless you to you kyara kyara god bless you how to feel when he thinks the grass is greener on the other side he wants someone younger because he said they don't require much i'm definitely hurt by this was engaged well it hurt but you at least got to appreciate his honesty i know that sound crazy but would you rather him drag you along get you pregnant then go and get her pregnant that's what a lot of questions i get women saying hey i'm eight months praying to find out that he got another one praying just like that that boy that man who the record label guy who had the two ladies praying at the same time like that's happening so much today so yes it kind of sucks but it's like listen yes you always got to flip it on the other side and say you know what if a man did sorry if you this basic to where you want to leave me to go get a younger woman because they don't require much that mean you a grown boy so this what i try to tell y'all all the time marcella god bless you marcella braxton this what i try to tell y'all all the time you didn't lose a man when it when it's like trivial petty reasons like that you didn't lose a man you lost a grown boy so you got to clap it up you got to clap it up you got to give them praise you hit me you got to shout you got to do your dance because when a grown boy leave your life if you got to cry while you shouting if you got to cry while you praising you got to do that because you didn't leave you didn't lose anything what that's what the saying of not every loss is a loss that's what they're saying i mean that when you lost that man you actually gained something because now you're gonna be able now you're going to be able to do more now you're going to be able to attract a real man and you're going to know what a grown boy look like because you just had one a share god bless you for being in a moderate got cherished and she missing a couple of the other moderators in the uh seara god bless you into a man that wants me to give him a chance he's ambitious and we have fun together however he smokes weed and his relationship with god is not strong keep moving keep moving keep moving one thing you can't compete against is an addiction you can't compete against that go about your business because he first it be that and they be talking about the oh this this come from the earth this green this come from the earth guess what i used to sell that i used to be out there it's gonna change them it's gonna change them first it be that then it'll be some pills then it be some pill crushed up in there then it'll be some dust then it'll be some dust crushed up in there it's gonna go to other that's why i call a gateway because if in the lead you scrape the he double hockey sticks because it's gonna open up other stuff and if it don't open up other stuff then it's still changing your personality changing your attitude changing your hustling your grind changing your focus it's affecting you and so when he got something that he is dependent upon and he don't know god that's a recipe for disaster that's like going in the chemistry lab not knowing what you're doing and mixing substances if in a blow up in your face speech to speech god bless you god bless you she came back or he i didn't want yet it's one came back to show appreciation for the way i decoded that question hey you put some work on me but i i sure appreciate you for appreciating thank you so much tony women's influence was a blessing started reading again thank you sharia as well may god bless your family i i appreciate you pretty black you got your question here right on time i see you right here in in the line over here man who's girlfriend man who's with girlfriend every weekend but doesn't spend time with son is a sorry man um alice for five hundred how y'all be saying that i don't i don't watch that show is a sorry man that just finished that on i is a sorry man see this what you have to realize with a lot of men with a lot of grown boys and um see what a lot of the grown boys what happens is they don't ever connect with their child because they they leave that distance in their heart and then they taking they chasing booty and the next thing you know he chasing her gonna have her on her back then gonna have her praying and be doing the same thing to her or he may stay and try to make that one work out because he sometimes see what what grown boys do they do grown folks things but they don't understand the repercussions that come with those actions they're not processing that okay yeah i'm sleeping with this woman but when you sleep with this woman this produce a child and they're not processing that they just taking care they selfish needs so and when a man makes that choice you gotta be okay with that because you don't want no sorry halfway in and i ignorant immature man influencing your son anyway you want a real man to influence him that might end up being his basketball coach that might be a school teacher but you don't want no sorry man that a choose a girlfriend every weekend over his son to even be near him so just appreciate it for what it is and move on can you talk a little bit about the self-love you membership um it's just the self-love you membership for those of you who visit the site selfloveyou.com which is really gaskinsuniversity.com you got three different membership levels and so one is life the 999 is just life general life courses and then the 1999 is life and love courses and then the 1999 I mean the 1999 is um you know I mean 2999 is life love and business courses so we're just and it's a monthly thing and it's just so that you could take courses paying a smaller fee like you could break it up monthly and you could cancel anytime you want to so you finish the course you want you could cancel it high tone the second time posting with the money amount okay I saw you first one didn't have a question with it though God bless you can you please read my pic I am 50 okay you look 30 in the picture but I can't really see it what vibe and I am I sending you you the vibe you sending from this picture that I see here is that you hiding ready like little scissors because what I see is a bunch of skin across the top and I see spaghetti strap and so I could see a little cleavage and then your hair looked like your same color which means that you dyed it so when you dyed your hair to look skin tone that mean you hiding ready like little scissors and then when you wear a spaghetti strap that mean if the wind blow stuff in the start showing and flying so that's what that picture is saying that's more so a picture for online dating profile if you're trying to snag you something quick rubiel god bless you got my copy of a woman's influence tony thank you god bless you in the family hey bless you bless you now these here now remember now these 499 they disappeared now I want y'all to understand that god bless y'all for that but if it disappear I lose it sometime do I have to get the life coach certification to be a life coach on my mentor dot life uh yes my mentor dot life as y'all see it's for certified coaches you know it's for certified life coaches so yes you got to take the life coach certification if you don't take mine you could take another you could take a different one but it and certification is not a real thing but it is a real thing what I mean by that is it's not governed by the state or by the government but it is a training so it trains you on how to be a life coach how to have etiquette how to coach a client you know how to build your business how to position yourself so you need you need that before you get out there and you accept the people money and and don't know your left front your right and you on the on the phone talking 55 minutes and letting them talk five minutes so you need to learn stuff about coaching before going on my mentor dot life because you're going to you know don't know what you're doing then you making the site look bad so it make that small investment the government sending you a stimulus check make that small investment you're going to make it back because it only called five hundred dollars so you got a lifetime to earn it so it ain't like college when you spend it fifty thousand dollars and then end up working in a different whole different degree field um keel is it weird that me and my ex-husband get along and talk sometimes I'm no longer angry and I don't want him back either I'm single it was a 20 plus year relationship that's not weird it's not weird it's it's it people do that you know my mom and daddy divorce and they they cool they don't you know talking basis Emmanuel God bless but what it is is it block your blessings it could block your blessings and um so what that mean is a new man if he found out you still kicking and shooting the breeze with your ex he might not be interested because he may not trust it he may not trust it so you know you kind of got to decide what what you want um gee i've got bless it God bless it now that change now you you got it you caught on a good day you caught on a good day um the the the cold it changes sometimes it's depending on the time of the money what's going on God bless your sitar smell um God bless you poor little life poor little life Ariana is it right to watch my ex life shadow the pieces or do the godly thing and help him be better because at the same time i'm not trying to build him up for another woman um uh when you say help him be better it's like what do you mean by help him be better like sending him money that's not helping him be better now if you want to so a book into his life so a video into his life then that's not that's not right or wrong but his life is not shattering to pieces just to be shattering to pieces you know it's shattering the pieces because of his doing so sometimes you got to let a person sit in a mess a person can't get the lesson if you don't let them sit in a mess so you got to let them sit in a mess so that they could get the lesson because if you come in trying to play god and you interrupted what's going on i saw a little meme one time and it was a funny meme and it was like hey can i borrow a hundred dollars and then the response was like no unfortunately i don't want to interrupt what god trying to do in your life so i'm not going to be able to get a hundred dollars and sometimes that's what it is and i told my sister that i said listen i can't interrupt what god trying to do in your life right now so no i don't have no money for you you just got to sit right there be broke for a second and get them lessons from that state of brokenness because the greatest lessons is right there when you in the valley when you rock bottom that's when you get the best lessons but you come all the way putting the mattress up up under somebody before they hit rock bottom they're never gonna learn that lesson there's a quote that says success is how high we bounce after hitting rock bottom so sometimes you got to let that happen let me see K.M. Tony me and my girl broke up about a month ago because i was a grown boy i know i'm in love what do you do in the six months to get your wife back i didn't do anything be honest with you because my ego was so big i moved on with my life you know um i moved on with my life we just so happy to come back together six months later because one of my friends wanted to link up with her roommate so i hit her up for my home boy he didn't show up and so then i asked her hey can you and i still link up so had i chased her right away it probably would have made her think i was crazy or probably would have pushed her pushed her away further but again i was 21 you know at this time so i was young i don't know your age and i don't know what you did also i hadn't cheated on her i had i hadn't been with her we had only been together like two three months so i hadn't even had chances so if if your woman gave you multiple chances your situation totally different if you weigh older than 21 your situation totally different so you know it's a lot of factors that go into that um k jordan god bless your boyfriend has a hard time trusting women been hurt by son's mother says he trusts me but afraid i'll hurt him how to get him to trust me completely what he got to realize is that there isn't if there is no trust there is no relationship and so what he has to realize is that he's going to have to trust you because if he doesn't trust you he's going to sabotage the relationship the coupon code is available for this month but it just depends you know it depends it changed with the market so but i'm trying to leave a coupon the my mentor coupon available for this month so that's what you got to realize you know and you can't do more to let him trust you because then you become a slave to his insecurity and that's what you can't do don't ever become a slave to somebody in security don't let somebody just because they insecure and they going through stuff now they get to put you on a ball and chain because of what the ex did that's not fair to you so it's like listen i'm not your ex so either you're gonna heal and you're going to learn the trust or this not gonna work but i'm not going to be no you know prisoner inside of a relationship so you got to understand that hey some of y'all when y'all do that super chat now it'll disappear so if you remember the blessed tribe just keep posting your question um in the in the chat um like cute cooper tonic should i tell my boyfriend about a guy friend that i speak to occasionally he is just a friend nothing has ever happened between us also thank you for all you do um yeah you should tell your boyfriend about a friend you know like i remember that happened early on in me and my wife relationship she got a text from a guy and i had i didn't know who the guy was she had never mentioned them and so and then she had his name in there is like b and to come to find out he was just a friend and they had class together and he was more friends with her roommate than her but she was hiding it because she felt like i was going to be jealous or insecure which i was and so i created a space that wasn't safe and so but i checked on that early and you know i was a young man 21 years old but i still do the same today i'm like who is this oh that's sudden we got class again i said well you didn't tell me about him so hit him up tell him not text you no more because you didn't tell me about him and so that's what i was still a grown boy at that time but nine out of ten men that's the way he's gonna move it really it's really gonna be hard press to find a man that's gonna let you be friends with a man and be talking to another man without him knowing that man like he got to know that man he got to shake that man hand he got to know that man because men know men and i don't care how you feel about it and and so if you if you feel like well this my friend and if if my man can't understand that then he got to go on by this business because i ain't gonna cut my friend off or distance myself from my friend then that's your choice that's your right that's your right but i'm just here to tell you you're gonna be single longer than you in a relationship because men know men and men know that it really no such thing as a male who just your friend unless he only only only a hundred percent like like other men and then even with that a straight man don't want you having that kind of friend because that straight man is going to be confused about if your friend lusting out the hymn and so it just it just it's bad all the way around that's the reality of it now whether it's right or wrong that's up to you i hung out with a guy and he texted me right after he dropped me off he had fun and to take care i said thank you and now nothing from him for three days um he don't want you he don't want you he don't want you it's either something like something you said some of your conversation just rub him the wrong way something turned him off you know something you did just something he picked up he don't want you he don't want you um sometimes it could have been you could have had a bug in your nose and you know you could have had some garlic on your breath men will cut you off a little stuff like that i remember talking to a guy he cut a woman off because she had a black line in her in her thumbnail you know men could be very petty and superficial and so it's just something you can't really worry about because you don't know why he made that decision um thali now i see y'all talking about analyze these pictures um we do that on coaching calls we do that on coaching calls coaching calls is a totally different price point also i can't really see y'all pictures so i it really ain't no real assessment and so y'all need to understand that i have extra weight on me i'm in the gym but struggling to eat healthy i'll be 25 soon um you know that'll determine your options it's kind of like when you go into the job market if you got a degree you got certain options that someone with a gd don't have if you got a master's you got certain options that someone with a bachelor's don't have the same thing with with you and what you bring into the table if you if you can't eat healthy and that means you put on an extra 50 pounds or 25 pounds your option going to be different than than they would be with those 25 pounds off you know so it does affect and change who is looking but you just got to get to a place where you're comfortable you got to be where you're comfortable and wherever you're comfortable then who you attract that's who for you but options do change as you change because of just preferences but i can't really read your picture because it's a side it's a side profile so i can't see it so what your picture says is i'm uninterested don't come for me don't write me don't say nothing to me i'm looking over here so that's not really a picture man i'll be really looking at see how how jacinth how jacinth picture right here she looking right at the camera and what her picture says is it says classy sophisticated and ready because it looked like a collar shirt i don't see no cleavage i just see a little bit of v right there i see a smile so it's a pleasant it says classy and it say ready she got a hair out so it looked like it's either natural hair or it's a natural hairstyle like weave that look like a natural hairstyle so it's a classy sophisticated pleasant and ready and she looking right at the camera but that could also mean taken because it's a classy and sophisticated see this how see i can articulate and i articulate what a lot of men may think and feel but can't put in the words and so that's what we do in coaching so but y'all can't you know i can't really do that right here with this little old bitty circle because i can't really see it just saying have a great man see how she taking just like i said what i told you didn't i say her picture could say taken i hadn't even read it yet have a great man but ended up having prior to marriage is it unrealistic to be around each other while holding off until marriage is it too late it is unrealistic but you got to set boundaries so what that may mean is is you that means that y'all may need to do dates outside of the home and outside of the back seat y'all need to do dates like that so y'all meet up but y'all doing something invigorating fun whether it's movies skating bowling skydiving swimming scuba diving whatever you're doing but you're doing something and it's not in the home if you do something in the home then what it need to be is hitting on i'm about to say hitting run it need to be eating run you know how people eat say i hate to eat and run and you be like go ahead and run now because i'm tired of your company anyway but you need to eat and run so you come on he cook you cook that's six o'clock by eight o'clock okay hey you know you know what we own so hey good seeing you call me on your way home or call me when you get home all right and run by and then let them go on by this business but see y'all try to hang out in the house to nine ten o'clock and that's when you end up okay once it cross once it get past eight o'clock ain't a lot open after eight especially right now in this nineteen but some legs I meant to tell you on the last chat that your video I can't lie about this really bless me it was definitely convicted and made me realize I was operating from a selfish place of righteousness hey God bless you Shanice I see you say continue okay you ain't operating from a selfish place nine with these two messages and these two blessings God bless you continue I'm still pursuing perfection you really do have a heart like no other a heart of gold thank you for being an excellent servant of God hey God bless you pour out in your life but for your efforts that you making them move towards I pray the Lord show up and show out to show you what's real Anisha God bless you a good man has a felony that can't be expunged or sealed is it good to write these type of duels off no not necessarily because you got to realize especially if he is if he is of a certain race pretty energy God bless you some felonies one out of four of us you know if he a black man one out of four black men end up in that system you know I went to jail in the ninth grade had I been 18 instead of 15 I could have had a felony you see what I mean so I but I was 15 when it happened and so it was able to be a sponsor but you got to realize like if you come from certain area a lot of times you already set up you already behind the eight ball so you looking for a way to get ahead because the system ain't really built for you to win and a lot of people think that's an excuse but that's the people who who got training they've been trained to run this the run this marathon and they got both of their legs and they got all these trainers and then talking about oh you making excuses when you got one leg and you starting 10 meters behind the starting line so you got to look at what that felony is so if it's him hustling you know stealing robbing something like that his money was on his mind was on money getting ahead if it's some physical with a woman now that felony different you see what I mean so now that's against a woman how he views women not how he views the government and the system so you got so I got a lot of you know felons around me and some of them the nicest people you'll ever meet but they were trying to beat the system to get some money and they pocket the feet a family I did the same thing I just didn't get caught God delivered me before it turned sour but I could be that you see what I mean so you got to look at each case for what it is God bless you Tika is there a time limit on when to know if he is seriously if he seriously regret a woman walking away or pushing back that time limit it'll be inside of a year it'll definitely be inside of a year honestly it's gonna be inside of six months and really inside of three depending on what is how big his ego is you see I mean like I didn't go back at my wife really to try to get her back because I saw how strong she was I didn't even feel like it was worth my time trying to get her back because I realized her strength so I had to slip into another way like hey let's just link up since we were supposed to link up anyway with my homeboy and your roommate but since he a no show let me and you just catch up so I came in like that but you know if a man really wants you and he believed he can get you he gonna come for you and it's gonna be inside of three months nine out of ten times Trisha God bless you should I be friends with a guy I had a situation ship with we get along great been over a year since we slept together we have the same vibes see friends is a strong word so when you say friends friend mean confidant friend mean it's a trusted individual you sharing hopes and dreams and stuff with so friends know colleagues constituents hey how you doing hope everything going well happy birthday merry Christmas stuff like that you know if you're gonna bump into them you gonna see them that's not gonna be the end of the world you know it's not gonna be the end of the world but to be honest with you once you've been there if you're trying to bring if you're trying to get with somebody new you're trying to be in a new relationship you're going about your business because that energy could block what you're trying to build Shakita Harris God bless you God bless you Shakita I'm believing and praying the Lord blessing you because I keep seeing you up in each chat so I'm praying for you now believe that doesn't matter I'm praying for you the felon is three years old and yeah but the felon has a hard time finding a job and yes he is black and it's sad because it causes fear for the future now see my barber you know went to prison but so what he did he became a barber you know it ain't about finding somebody's job it's about creating a job does he have an ambition to go get a job or he's just sitting there man you know I got a family man they won't let me get ahead man I can't do that I got a whole bunch of guys that have been to prison but they drive trucks you know or they start their own trucking company they they do temp work so it ain't about he ain't got to walk in the state farm insurance talking about let me be the director with this hill felony but there's plenty of jobs out there now I used to work in the warehouse public warehouse everybody in there was a felon you know what I mean but you in there lifting boxes public don't care because they need some horses in there they need some bulls in there moving that them grocery huh they want all the more felon is the better come on huh and so the jobs out there now so you got to look at his ambition but here's the thing don't make excuses for no grown man don't make no excuse for no grown man miss till god bless you a strange husband keeps sending me dumb messages on ig and now his sister sent a message is this a mind game I've been ignoring them purchase the book thank you for your time yep it's a mind game block them block them block them don't play by that don't play with that block button there's it's a lot of people on hill when y'all be seeing them thumbs down there's people out and block there's people out and block and they coming from the other page nah because I don't play about it hey don't play about your energy don't play about your peace don't play about your space a lady made a comment about my wife being light-skinned and it's like my wife my wife black what you got to be a certain kind of I didn't choose her because she likes me I choose because I fell in love when I thought she was a Puerto Rican I went to hall level for a one night stand so I wasn't even looking at no the woman before her was was darker than me my mama the woman who birthed me lighted in my wife so it's like I can't I can't be with a woman that's that's my that's my mama color my mama lighted in my wife but I can't be with a woman so guess what that sister got she got blocked she got blocked talking about old light skin gold figure or something like that blocked you'll never leave another comment don't be comment I told y'all do not speak on my wife because listen here I have somebody at your house you hear me I have somebody at your house I do not play by the queen I do not play and it's a trend now it is a trend it's a lot of black men that's looking for a woman that's a certain complexion I met my wife in 2005 that wasn't the trend then that was actually a taboo almost but that's the problem with that colorism that's the problem with that that we got to get past and realize that all shades is beautiful it's your old presses that made you want to fight against each other because y'all different shades but you all from Africa so you got to get y'all light together with that that's what they got blocked I spray my thumb my thumb my thumb still a little jam I hit that button so hard Deanna forgive me forgive me I just get carried away with when somebody come come for the queen I'd be ready to do life you hear me been married for almost six years I'm 28 and he's 30 I had a child from previous relationship and one with him we just can't seem to make it work separate it now I want it he says he doesn't input let it go any time a man tell you he don't want you you got to let it go you got to let it go because when a man say that he mean it you could you could fight for it you could try to make it work you could try to do all of that and you just going to be hurting the process you going to be hurting in the process trust me don't when a man tell you he don't want you go on about your business until he have a come to Jesus meeting and he changed his whole attitude energy and he and he come and show you that he's a new man he's a different man hold on right quick A.E. God bless you God bless you hi Tony for me you are the goat on twitter a married celebrity DM me couple of inappropriate messages guess he thought I'd be flattered not I'm a fan but a follower of Jesus blocked because of you I don't realize of my value blessings to you always A.E. God bless you thank you for that blessing that was a mighty mighty blessing that you sent mighty blessing and you know what my sister-in-law see love say okay I see you and I'm finna up you one see love God bless you just a blessing good commentary to listen to while finishing my accounting homework have a good day Tony and a blessed trial bless you all God bless you I pray you be I pray you do taxes too so you could earn in that tax season with that accounting and a CPA too Amber God bless you poor out in her life my baby daddy finally apologize via text message for mistreating me and my children after I left a year ago but don't know if I can trust it he has me on block list and makes it hard to co-parent and I'm struggling with forgiveness because treatment was horrible I tell you what you the mood on with your life has been a year ago you really done forgave them but you just you wiser you learn from it so listen somebody say text message heck no and I agree with that that that apology you telling a wiper booty with it that policy don't mean nothing that ain't no different than a man on the moon apologizing for being on the moon and so I wouldn't even worry about it don't lose no sleep just keep moving just keep pressing do what you got to do as a mother and be a hundred percent a mother now y'all let me find some of your questions out of mess up here okay I'm gonna miss some some some colors in there Sheila God bless you I see that um that super chat God bless you Sheila I'm scrolling up okay I see that why does it seem that guys who play women struggle financially no matter if they make good money or not do you feel that God is punishing them or just karma no it's just it just showed you that character you know money run like water you haven't been so ill when you ain't never got enough money if you ain't got enough character so that's what that is that's all that is is they gonna struggle just because the same way they treating women the same way they treat their money just run through it my baby daddy finally apologized okay so oh okay so you paid for that one I see I don't scroll back up to see some questions and you you didn't get an answer so you put it up there with them blessing God bless you now I'm looking for hashtag Q thoughts on building social media presence prior to finishing certification I am currently taking a health coaching certification course thank you um yep build it watch the video I posted today and that'll help you but definitely build it definitely build it what's up when they check in during coronavirus just bored bored sitting there thinking I'm looking for this hashtag Q now y'all put hashtag Q before you question so I could see it if somebody reach out to you during this time just let them talk to the dial tall ladies some of your questions Tony has a video posted take time to watch he always gives more details in the video now y'all listen to Kia what you could do is go to my page click on the videos and you could click on oldest it'll say oldest newest or most popular click on oldest and then you'll see you could just scroll through all the titles now as y'all know sometimes the title might be different than the actual content so just save them to a playlist and just listen to them on your free time is it smart to keep my options open while dating if so what's a decent limit two to three why are you dating as long as you're not sleeping around okay as long as you're not sleeping with them then it's okay to have your options open the other thing is dating is literally you going on dates and you having conversations that's okay the limit is when you feel like you've been to mix up names and stories so if John went to Crenshaw High and Bobby went to LaSalle High you can't be talking to John talking about so yeah when you went to LaSalle and then he like hold on I told you I went to Crenshaw what you talking about so now you getting stuff mixed up and then understand this ladies if you're gonna date multiple men then make sure that's in your repertoire make sure you built like that if you not built like that then just focus on that one at a time but if you built like that to where you can talk and go on multiple dates the same way men do then okay the kids stay off your bike you mentioned that it is a bad decision to date someone that needs citizenship can you explain on that if it's a man or it could be a woman when somebody needs something from you like if they want to if they talk in marriage and they need citizenship that's a red flag it does not mean that it can't be real love it could be real love but you got to make sure you see all the other aspects and consistency and patterns of real love if you don't see the other aspects of real love with their consistency the way they talk to you the way they treat you transparency you don't sense any cheating if if everything else don't look like real love across the board and they can't date you for 12 months straight being consistent and transparent then they wait you for that citizenship when they talk about oh let's get married let's get married let's get married y'all been talking three months and they need citizenship that's when you know it's for that citizenship thank you God bless you you and your wife been reading the woman's influence definitely blessing Deanna God bless you Emanuella God bless you my sister is married but she is so dependent on him and has always needed someone to support her how do I help her realize her worth outside of a man you're not gonna be able to do that you just ain't gonna be able to do that because see what a man could give her a man could give her something you can't give her then what a man could give her that you can't give her and that right there when she get that right there it released something in her body that she don't get that release from you so you could be over here all day long and why are you doing this right here he come right up to put that and she oh sister oh I got to go because he could give her something you can't give her so you're never gonna be able to give her to understand that trust me because I got a sister and her relationship choices absolutely terrible the worst I've ever seen one of the worst I've ever seen and this is what I do every day in my own sister will not listen to a word I got to say these men probably have so much fun saying yes one of the top relationship coaches in the world and I'm dogging this sister out and I try to talk to her my daddy try to talk to her and she will not listen because of what the men could do for her that I can't do for that my daddy can't do for so what you got to do is just love them from a distance support them how you could support them and then one day they're gonna hit a head so hard that the cushion gonna wake them up and instead of knock them out and then you be there to speak life into them but everybody on their own path everybody take their own time they say money don't buy happiness but everybody wanna find out for their self they say love don't equal happiness but everybody wanna find out for their self so you know people gonna go through their path on their own and you just got to support them the best you can don't turn your back on them because they may need you one day but don't get mad when you giving them wisdom and they not listening Nina God bless you I was pursued by a man hard for 30 days he cooked for me met his mom he was looking at ring saw me daily we started not spending as much time he said he was a recluse and will isolate for days he a recluse lie he recluse up under another woman that's what he doing ain't no man no recluse when he cooking for you and for two don't ever let a man cook for you again I don't care if his name Bobby Flay because he could put something in there put that Bill Cosby special in there don't let a man cook for you a recluse lie tell him he a recluse and he didn't introduce you to his mama he ain't no recluse telling the white boss gets new knowledge but she shy and don't want to show his name or face don't know what you talking about glam rocks Nina he also wasn't used to women having their own place and had to get used to it I kept a clean home that always smells good he started bringing his male roommate over with him when he would come and wouldn't stay long why? he was bringing the male roommate over to get his opinion to get his opinion on you hey let me show you what I got and then you tell me you tell me what you think your message on Easter was so inspiring and so spiritual did you have to get off and thank God in private I felt that in my spirit as you minister to the people yeah but I thank God all day every day you know I see the thing what a lot of people don't realize about prayer is prayer for me is every breath I take right now in this moment I'm giving glory and honor and praise to God in this moment because it's in my mind it's I'm saying it over before every video I do I say Lord be with me give me wisdom knowledge and understanding so for me as as as non-star last night I woke my wife up about one o'clock in the morning I was crying and I shouldn't even be telling you all this because I don't do this like the Pharisees but I was just crying last night now I only got me by I got me by four tears out but I just was crying about the goodness about the goodness of God it hit Jeff floored me I'm like Lord you done been so good to me you hear me you done been so good to me I'm trying to tell you all this thing real what makes a woman stand out from the rest it's when a man inquires within see when a man inquires within that's when he finds out what make a woman stand out is beyond the beauty okay so a woman taking care of her body presenting herself you know as as a temple that she take care of herself she loves herself that's that's the first thing gonna make her stand out just the fact that he could see her glowing he could see her confidence it don't matter about her shape or her weight he looking at confidence then he looking at how she carries herself because it's some women it's women are all different shades complexions and sizes that's Mary it's the confidence and see what a man does is a man inquires within so when he inquires within now he gets to see what she bought so most women today most women today because they desperate they own their bike because they desperate for a man and so they think if they could pull out them tricks in that bed that's gonna get a man they think if they could go in that kitchen and sprinkling all that paprika in that food knowing that paprika ain't got no taste but just because they think they put some red and think they got it that that's gonna win them and then so they trying to cook them and then they trying to hook them and book them and once they do that they think that's gonna keep a man but no they're mad trying to see what their heart at what their mind at that spirit he trying to see does she know her value does she know what she brings to the table does she know that her body is hers and that he got to work for her love walk her down somebody out give her a commitment until life before he really truly feels like he deserve her body he want to see if she know that if she know that that it's of the essence that he works for her heart then she's standing out from the rest but loose booty 901 miss desperation he like she just like the rest of them hey hold on let me get some of these questions my ex and I have been broken up for six months we have been in contact since but not every day he even took me out on a few days but puts his success as a priority was there a time you had to put your success first for one y'all broken up y'all broke up okay so for two he putting success first you is all the way last okay now you as a roster filler you what you call a roster filler you're not even his woman you're not even in his plans you're not even in his future you're not even in his consideration so understand that right there now now see once a man engaged you security once a man to marry you once you with a man see me doing what I'm doing right now my wife know I'm working right now before I did this right here my wife taking a nap then she came out from taking a nap and she made me a bacon and egg sandwich okay then she let me do this when I finished this we got we gonna be together for the next few hours so this a part of my success and then I come back and I do me alive tonight when I get off that live then we together some more hours you see what I mean so don't even consider that he got you in his plans when y'all broke up and been broke up for six months and he called you every now and then you ain't in his plan sister so you need to close that door and go on about your life but when y'all together on a team then yeah that's when you know the man got to work but he's not putting no success first he putting other women first he dating around looking for the woman that he want to settle down with it ain't about no success because success don't take 24 hours a day that one thing I tell you success don't take no 24 hours a day you know what now I missed some of the a couple of these here super chats Tony Asia God bless Tony what are some examples of good integrity that a woman should look for in a man look up the word integrity look up the word integrity become one with the word integrity and then that's what you look for in a man all right so you're not gonna see everything but here's some things see when a man has integrity it's not just about integrity it's also about character so what you have to look at when you're looking at this man is and yes I do have a video on that I do have a video on that somebody say I got a video on that unless I got a video on everything if y'all just take the time and go look through all the video so but what you got to realize is if a man does something that's gonna cut his life short then that's a lack of character so if he's getting drunk he's cutting his life short if he getting high he couldn't his life short if a man does something that works against the abundance and the blessings of his future like gambling if he gambling then he built in a habit that eventually is gonna steal all his wealth all his worth so that's a lack of character if a man if you see a man cheating in his business and stealing in his business and he say oh like he got working on my roof today they gave me an honest rate but as I'm getting different estimates some people estimate that for me to do my roof all over some will say this crazy number some will come with the number that's 10,000 or less and I'm like how y'all do the same thing give me a quote but see one of them know who I am they might have them Google me they might have them look at the price of the house and say oh we're gonna hit them with this right here because we he can afford it that's a lack of integrity so when you analyzing this man you see how he treats the waiter who you see how he treat the waiter you see how he treat people who serve him you know working for him working with him you see how he handles his business this how you see his integrity if he's a liar if he's a stealer if he's a cheater if he's a deceiver if he's a manipulator if you see him doing that to other people he'll do it to you that's how you read them dated a guy five months thought we had a good connection no intercourse he went back hey y'all I got about 12 more minutes on here now gotta go pick up my Shakuta reward dated a guy five months we had a good connection no intercourse he went back to X didn't last two months now saying he loves me felt it so he ran apologetic for that wants a chance should I y'all be writing a mess out of these questions now and y'all ain't seen a period since high school y'all just dropped a period in there or not then not but you already know your answer some of y'all just ask a question just to hear me read it out loud absolutely not for one it wasn't but five months he he ain't have five months with you and he leave you to go back to his ex that mean he got a soul tie it only last two months because because he think is she gonna accept him back broke busted and disgusted and desperate he went to find out that she still don't want his sorry but because he still ain't grown and change so now he come back to you oh I love you because now he think you dumb so see this is the thing men think women dumb and ignorant and naive and you know why because 90% of the women that men deal with are naive and gullible because you operating from desperation you got all the sense you got all the knowledge y'all know the answer to these questions you already know the answer but you just want to hear somebody else say it y'all already know the answers come on now y'all know the answer and that's what men know so when a man know that you know better but you not gonna do better he gonna treat you like a fool because you playing the fool you know this song everybody play the fool heaven sent God bless you Tony how do you feel about prenuptial agreements we usually hear about men asking for one but what about a woman asking for one you know it's a personal choice it's a personal choice and to be honest with you I'm a man you know I see the game from both sides being a coach but I didn't have anything to lose when I got married so a prenupt wasn't really nothing for me so I can't really speak to that because if I was who I am today as far as financially and business and all of them things with assets and I was and I had to get married then I may say something different about it but I can't really speak to that me I believe in love and I take a gamble on love so for me it's like this I wouldn't ask a woman to sign a prenupt if I had to get married to my wife right now because I'm like if I can't trust you to be with me for the rest of my life if I don't feel like the way I'm loving you going to have you here for the rest of my life then I don't want to be with you if I got to sign a plan B before I marry you then I don't want to be with you because that means I don't trust you and that means I don't trust marriage and that means I don't trust that this thing going to work out and so when you sign that prenupt you really saying like hey it's a 50% chance this thing going to fail and a lot of times what you say and what you're preparing for that's what happens and so you look at it me personally I'm gonna see it like this if I choose wrong and you get to leave with half I need that because all I lost money I could get money back but I need to lose that so I so I learned my lesson I always been the type of person that I want my weapon what I mean like what I mean by that if I do wrong I'll take it my dad at the belt hey yeah just stole out of my all here go to the belt and go with me and I stand there and I used to take my weapon me I want my weapon a lot of people don't want their weapon so for me I think losing half is the price you pay for choosing the wrong person for rushing in for not getting in something that you that you trust that for not being with somebody that you thoroughly vetted and that you trust I believe me and my wife would be married until the day we die and if and if something else happened otherwise it is money it's money you know Michael Jordan lost 220 million he didn't have a prenup lost 220 million you think Michael Jordan to Mr. Mill is money so but see one thing that I know as a relationship coach what I have seen I've seen prenups end a relationship because when you take something that's love and you introduce business when they sit down with that contract and the lawyer start to go at it now they like oh we really ain't got no real love and so a prenup can go ahead and cancel that marriage so it's a personal choice me I don't worry about money and stuff like that so I couldn't care less but some people that's your life word that's how you view it me if my wife love you can have half you can have all of it as long as I I heard that saying one time the man said give her everything just leave my bible as long as I got my holy bible I get all of it back that's how I feel I go to broke I used to go to bed broke and wake up the next morning rich according to the world standards of money I used to go to bed broke and wake up rich so I don't look at money like that baby daddy out of my son's life for four years reached out because son was struggling for him emotionally he's still not showing interest son calls no answer only text don't know how to tell my son his father's not ready to be a father to him you know it's a hard thing that's a real hard thing and you just gonna have to sit down and get it on real because listen the world is not going to take it easy on your children I tell my son and my wife tell my sons just like the ISL's you can't pull no punches you got to say listen your daddy not ready to be a father because he's still hurting he's still lost he don't know his father his father was not a good man so he's still hurting and that's really why a man is like that he hurting and he lost it's not just that he nasty and he's this evil individual he hurting and he lost explain that to your son let him hear that and then when we seek to understand then we understood but see what happens is with a lot of time with women is y'all want to hate the man and y'all want to be mad at the man so you're not trying to seek to understand why this man acting that way it just ain't nobody just don't want to be in their child life when they're not in their child life that's because if you could see that man life on the screen you will see that man probably went through so much pain so much hurt so much you know trials and tribulations that you might start crying if you could watch your son father life play out on the screen and then it'll make all the sense in the world why he is the way he is so that's why we have to seek to understand then be understood and explain that to your son it's not just that person is just so nasty and dirty and just got the worst hard and the worst intentions and just sorry by nature it's that they hurting broken loss confused going through just sent i missed your question let me see bless you thank for that blessing um he changed his plans on me from selling his house in one year to get us a house together then he changed his mind to wait five years when he retires to sell so i got alarmed and left did i overreact no you didn't overreact you got to do what you got to do you got to do what you got to do you you you ain't overreact he he put you on this stall plan he one year five years they ain't talking about it when he retired how old is man yeah man you too old to be playing these kind of games man come on now you getting ready to retire man you will see your citizen man come on you supposed to know what you want when you want it how you want it okay hard and ready like little Caesar you taking all this time to figure out something about a house man please i got to go now you you ain't overreact Alexandria God bless you will some men still knock down loose booty 901 you confuse me all here lb i'm like lb oh but that's my little word loose booty 901 listen to her pillow talk or give her constant communication with her for months then drop her like a bad habit all along knowing she is not the one absolutely absolutely men do that all day every day men do that all day every day you know they they they tell loose booty 901 out the frame you hear me tell her out the frame talk to her they smoke her like a cigarette that's what loose booty 901 is they smoking her like a cigarette now the thing about it is is she got a heart she won't love she just have not done the work she just don't know where she going wrong and she thinks she know too much so she don't want to sign up for for coaching on my mentor that life so she sitting over there getting drill and then she getting left and then she crying and then what everybody can love be and but she don't want to do she don't want to get no help she know too much to be on the live getting the answers she know too much to watch video she thinks she know it all so that's why the men keep doing it like that you got to get the knowledge Shanice God bless you not Shanice not you ain't scamming this you're not you know sent three blessings in here today not God bless you now hey Lord must be blessing you as we speak thank you for the person who sent me that cash out to caramel kisses she be put my cash out on there and y'all see that and um sent me a cash out hey God bless you I really appreciate that eight of my last question is it okay to ask a man what type of relationship he wants instead of asking what his intentions are you should not ask him what his intentions are and to be honest with you when it comes to relationship stuff you really don't need to ask questions on like what type of relationship you want because because to be honest with you he don't even know what type of not some may know but you really that's not a question you really need to ask so the question you need to ask is for one you got to relax the conversation so what do you like to do where do you like to go you know what you like to do for fun what's your favorite speaker what's your favorite book you know what's your favorite sport who's your favorite team oh really how did they do in 1970 what's your favorite player on the team oh why do you like him you said I mean you relax the conversation then when you relax the conversation and he talking about him rebuilding his cars him doing you know all this stuff I'm so signing up for a coaching session once I get my check Miss Cooper God bless you God bless I'll be here and he talking about all this then you talk to him and you ask him so what's your take on kids you know how do you feel about kids you know you seem like a gentle spirit and that's how you do it you see how I say you seem like a gentle spirit so it's not like interrogation like okay so do you want kids this how y'all be okay do you want kids okay do you want to be married okay how long do you want to date okay um do you leave the toilet seat up okay after you eat do you pick up your plate okay and see that's how y'all want to be you can't do that you got to have a normal conversation and you just had a conversation and you just let it flow and this what you got to do you got to pretend like you Oprah you hear me when Oprah get down on that count Oprah how you telling her what color draws you got on and you don't even realize it well yeah Oprah you know I just decided this morning to put on my purple underwear and she like oh really oh really and so yeah I mean what made you choose purple well Oprah my monthly just ended yesterday and it was like as soon as it was over my husband like knocked it right back on and Oprah like oh really wow so yeah so when that happened how did that make you feel and so now you them telling all your business so when you talking to a man you got to pretend like you Oprah and you talking to the most interesting man in the world and you want to understand oh I like your hat what made you choose that hat that blue is amazing oh so the Marlin so who um what's that star player and then he gonna tell you yeah so you like him why do you like him and see you once you get a man comfortable this what this what a lot of women don't understand every on the jane god bless you there were a lot of women don't understand the more a man expresses the more he falls in love see the average woman speaks 25,000 words a day the average man only speaks 10,000 words a day so when y'all go in there y'all doing all the talking 25 is two and a half times 10 so y'all talk two and a half times the amount of time he talked and that's why you end up on your bike that's why you end up falling in love because you was talking the more a person talks the more they fall in love because when you express yourself that's why coaching and therapy and counseling is meant to help people and that's why I help people because they are expressing so when you get this man talking now he relax now you his life coach now you his therapist now you his wife now you his lover now now he built in trust with you because he done talked so much that he don't want to hurt you because he done fell in love with you because you listen to him and for the first time in his life somebody listened to him without criticizing him and judging him he been getting punched in the chest his whole life he been getting slapped his whole life and now when you come and you slapping them with all these questions interrogate them he like okay got something for you finna put you on your bike dog your butt out since you want to do me just like the rest of the world but when you come in with a heart of love you love yourself that's different somebody say can I ask you a question and send a blessing in you coulda put your question in right there now claudie coulda put your question in right there hey now I got to go I don't want over four minutes now pandora god bless you now don't send no more blessing y'all don't send nothing else in now don't send no more all friends and nothing y'all because I got to go now I think I got to go pick up my chakuta reward and uh that little bit of jesus juice going through a breakup during quarantine is driving me crazy I don't want my ex back but the loneliness is bringing me into utter desperation you know what you got to put these videos on all day day free put these videos on and just let it fill your subconscious fill your subconscious what goes in come out so what's going to happen is when you take and you get new knowledge it's going to start to explain the things that you don't understand about your relationship and when you get clarity that's why they say knowledge is power knowledge is power because it builds confidence so when you get new knowledge now you build your confidence and as you build in your confidence then now you able to heal that's what helps you heal now I was wanting to see if claudia posted the question and then make that my last question because I don't like accepting blessings from people and not being a blessing in return so claudia if you still in here post your question now and uh let me make your question my last question and then I'm going to go and get on up out of here go get this here I said don't send no more blessing let me see if they got a question with it look at taunia taunia God bless you God bless you God bless you poor little life lord I done put the offering plate up and taunia gonna run up there hey hold on very true he has daddy issues and life became hard after I left him for denying my son but thinks if I'm back in his life will be better I don't want him at all he doesn't believe in God because of life situation yeah I can't stamp a man who don't believe in God I just can't deal with it oh claudia I see up here I got your question here somebody else in the blessing in hey y'all hold on okay all right I got the gold now I got the gold now my wife ain't really waiting on me but still I'm trying to get up here Del Frisco get this charcuterie board they passing out on the page 75 dollars for that okay got the gold claudia in a six year relationship six year relationship okay you didn't say marriage six years you three years past the deadline now I'm at a point of no more sent him a text saying I need us to be on the same page with this okay so you had to text them y'all don't live together then I have to make a decision moving forward do you think I'm right about this absolutely you didn't gave three years two minutes see when you ain't married by year three got the gold if God be for me God bless you God bless you thank you for that blessing never make sure I ain't miss nobody right here real quick now because I don't like to take nobody blessing and not be no blessing now some of y'all that's using the chat I might have missed you forgive me okay claudia y'all been sleeping together okay six years yeah you playing yourself claudia yeah you playing yourself he don't want you he don't want you when a man with you sleeping with you more than three years and he ain't married to you don't want you he don't want you because you didn't gave your body so now he didn't got that so now he done had all of you mentally spiritually physically and he still ain't married you he don't feel you the one so he looking around for your replacement when he find her he gonna drop you like a bad habit so you best off dropping him before he drop you listen to what I'm telling you now I ain't told you no lie hey god bless y'all I appreciate you I might depending on what I got to do the night well on my date depending on what time my date night is in the hill house it's in the house of course we still in lockdown to here in Florida even though our governor seem to be a fried short of a happy meal we we going to do a takeout to get this hill have us a little date night so if it's at seven then I go live maybe at nine if it's that if it's gonna be at nine then I might go live again at seven p.m. Eastern but God bless I really appreciate you we'll talk soon