 Hello everyone welcome to another live video this one speaking about how you have zero friends and you don't fit in because you may have been trying to make friends for a while you may have been trying to fit in to certain groups or communities wherever it may be but it's like the matter what you do never seem to fit in you never seem to establish any friendships any groups or to be able to participate in a social circle that leaves you very confused you don't understand why or maybe you may have had some friends before you may have fitted into a social circle or group setting but then for whatever reason you just seem to drift apart you could no longer remain together and in some situations they may even have turned against you they may have gossiped about you behind your back and now you're left on your own you've got no friends don't fit into anything maybe you feel completely alone you may feel lonely and you may feel as though you're just on your own in what you're about and in what you like what you desire what you're interested in so I'm here to talk about it to bring some light to why you don't have any friends right now and you don't fit into anything I'm here to bring some awareness to you for that to help you to understand the reasons why I made especially since you decided to join me today in watching this video that I'm speaking about it reveals a lot about what you may be going through right now so yeah I think it's very good it's very beneficial for you to be listening to this content and to continue watching so that it can help you to identify why you haven't made friends up until this point I mean I don't know how old you are but maybe you never managed to make any friends or maybe you did before and then you lost them so yeah I'm here to talk about that and to shed some light on what may be going on for you and I've got a feeling that it will resonate with you it will begin to make more sense you will begin to understand and then we can even begin speaking about how you can make friends and how you can move forward in your life instead of always having to be alone so let's get into this right now when we talk about friendships even relationships what happens is how people tend to group together it's usually over a shared interest now this could be over something intellectual it could be a hobby a physical interest whether it's like going to the gym sports working out that kind of thing but it could also be over some other activity and it may not always be something positive it could be going out to clubs drinking alcohol smoking even doing drugs gossiping behind people's backs marking and ridiculing people people can bond together over these types of activities and interests and it doesn't always have to be something bad it could be something where it's like you had a group of friends and they're more into playing football and you're not really into that so it just doesn't interest will concern you anymore and they're going more into that direction and maybe you prefer reading books so that's how you can then move apart as friends and really if that's okay if you liked playing that sport before that was the only thing that you had in common I know you're moving on to other things and it's not to say that playing sports is bad of course not playing sports is great but you may just prefer something else at this point in your life and that's okay there's nothing wrong with that it's only bad if they start to turn against you because now you're not into those sports maybe you prefer a different sport you prefer going to the gym instead when I have friends who can understand how things are for you and what you prefer to do at different stages of your life so if it's something like that with sports that's not so much about what I'm getting into in this video but it's okay it's understandable people can move apart because of things like that but another thing maybe another thing could be when we're talking about shared interests because that's typically how friendships build and we create social circle social circles as well we have things in common with each other so it could be something where you used to hang around with a certain group of people and maybe they recently got into going to clubs bars drinking alcohol smoking doing drugs or maybe you used to do that stuff before but now you don't anymore so now you're not into going to clubs bars drinking all of that kind of stuff you're going in a more healthier direction so now you don't bond with those types of people but what you may find with people who are involved in things that could be considered toxic even though they can be socially acceptable it can be considered toxic and harmful to our health as well when they see that you're moving on and you're moving up and you're going in a healthier direction for your life they may feel like they're being left behind and then they may try to drag you back into that because otherwise they feel like they're doing something wrong they feel guilty they feel shameful so they may try to drag you back into that again or they may even become quite vicious I mean sometimes it can be the case with people who drink a lot of alcohol all of the time or especially if they're into drugs recreational drugs street drugs yeah they can become quite vicious towards you even quite violent when you're trying to move on past that so you do need to be very careful but understand that can be another reason why you now have no friends and you don't fit in because a lot of people these days they enjoy going out to bars clubs drinking alcohol doing drugs as well and you don't want to be a part of that you don't want to be involved I mean I'm sure if you started to go into bars and clubs again and you were drinking alcohol I'm sure you would start making more friends you would begin to fit in again but at some point you've decided not to do that and to move on in a healthier direction for your life again I would just touch upon that and that's really leading to the center topic of this video which is that you're really just growing and elevating as a person in your life I mean if you look at how you were before if you look at yourself a few months ago a few years ago you will see that you have grown you have elevated maybe physically emotionally mentally psychologically you've really grown as a person now you've developed different habits healthier coping strategies healthier interests and activities that you engage in in your daily life and if you compare that to people who you used to be friends with maybe certain family members or even just people that you see at your workplace or even when you go to the gym or just people in your community you'll find that most of them do not share the same common interest with you I mean to give an example I can speak for myself where I've spoken about in past videos how back in 2018 I changed a lot of things in my life or even not going back further before that I remember when I was 18 19 I started going to the gym more I was more into sports and becoming healthier and fitter eating the right types of food so by doing that already I was elevating and separating myself from a lot of people began to see me as though I'm arrogant and I think I'm better than them and many of them began to turn against me and then I lost a lot of friends and then also as I said back in 2018 I began to change a lot of things in my life then as well where I then gave up alcohol I stopped smoking weeds I give up video games as well and I I then started this YouTube channel I've been making these videos every day since then as well I also became a vegan I give up eating meat and also caffeine so just so many things that I just disengaged from I stopped getting involved in these what I would consider to be unhealthy habits because again you know also it's not not everything is just cut and dry right all wrong I mean I'm not getting on here to say that you know you have to be a vegan if anything else is bad anything else is wrong I'm not saying that at all I mean from my research there are some health benefits to eating fish maybe eggs as well so while I've chosen to become a vegan myself I'm not advocating that for everyone else you have to pay attention to how it makes you feel when you're adopting certain habits and taking part in certain activities but then some people do have quite an inflexible and rigid personality and belief system where it's like you're either with me or you're against me you're either a vegan or I'm not gonna talk to you I'm not your friends or you have to give up alcohol smoking or you must drink so that you can engage with us and be a part of this social circle unfortunately that's how some people are but really what we need to do is find the middle grounds as healthy people emotionally and understand some people can be going through some things maybe they do rely on a cigarette sometimes a drink and as long as you set a boundary where it's like okay just don't drink alcohol around me don't smoke cigarettes in my presence you can do that around your other friends then I think that's okay as long as there's that separation especially if it's just something they're going through in their lives they're going through a phase they are trying to move in a healthier direction in those cases you can give them time and then maybe things will change in the future it all depends on how long you're going to wait I mean as this person being drinking doing a bars smoking and doing all of these unhealthy habits for several weeks several months is it too long for you to be a part of their lives because now it's affecting you these are individual cases and it's really only you that will know and it's the same thing with people who are toxic the very argumentative they always want to pull you into it or their argument they're always going to be against you they always find a reason some kind of fault they're always nitpicking if they constantly doing that they're always pointing the finger at you blaming you for everything never taking accountability the odds are that they're never going to change they're always going to be that way because otherwise at some point they would begin to self reflect and look at themselves if a person does self reflect and they can take accountability you could work with someone like that they may be able to progress they may be able to advance but then sometimes it can just be manipulation maybe they're coming back with fake apologies false epiphanies but then that nothing actually changes when you look back over the many months and years that you spent with them they're still exactly the same these are people you want to remove yourself from you should not want to be a part of their lives and you should not want it to be a part of yours because it's one of those things where you look back the months or years that you spent with them or their lives even before you were involved with them and it's like what are the positive changes that they have made that's what you've got to look at but then also you can't go judge another people before you judge yourself I mean you can't just point the finger and say you haven't made any positive changes in your life you have made anything anything better you're still drinking alcohol you getting drunk every day and you're saying that at the same time you've got a bottle in your own hands so obviously it's like the potculling of kettle black you need to serve as an example yourself well you need to be moving in that direction and taking accountability in your own life before you can then not point the finger but at least then distance yourself from certain types of people as I have done in my life where it's like I stopped drinking alcohol I stopped going to bars and clubs and then I began to just dissociate from those types of people myself and they may look at you like you think you're better than us they may even see it as arrogance unfortunately that's just how some people are gonna see it and I do think it's quite toxic for people to see it that way because for myself when I've seen people I mean typically on YouTube when I was watching videos and I saw them elevating and improving things themselves and their lives I didn't turn against them I didn't begin to hate them I didn't start to see it as though they're arrogant so they're better than me but then in some ways yeah I did look at it and think but they are better than me in some ways that inspired me to change and to do better in my own life and for myself so it's not always a bad thing to see I mean it's not that people are all around better than us it's people can be better than us in some ways yes definitely and there's nothing wrong with that there's nothing wrong with that at all I mean some things like being a vegan you could argue over whether or not fish is healthy and eggs either way it's still harmful to animals and that's what I stand by so I'm against it for myself but I can't just go and push my beliefs on to everyone else because then I can look back at my life that's like it's only a few years ago I was eating myself so I'm able to give people time until they're ready to make that progression in their lives without pushing it on to them but that also it's like how much time do you give them until you realize that you have to separate and distance yourself from them because otherwise it's gonna bring you down and I've seen a quote that says we're like the sum of the five people we spare the most time around so if you're around people who are constantly eating meat if you haven't got strong discipline in yourself who's to say that that won't have an influence on you and you could start becoming that way as well but then also certain things are open to debate they really are I mean you can look at things like drinking alcohol even smoking weed I mean what's my opinion on that I would instantly say it's harmful it's dangerous it could damage your health they can even it can damage your brain that's what hangover is I can say that but then for someone else they could be going through a difficult time in their lives whatever it may be they might say no I'm much better when I have a drink I'm much better when I have a glass of wine far less less stress in my life much easier to talk to much more calmer I'm able to think I remember someone before they that I used to talk to she said she's much better able to study when she smokes a joint of wheat so it's always a debate but what I would say and I think that most people will agree with me on this is that everything should be in moderation I think this is where we can find common ground even with those who do drink alcohol and they do smoke weeds or whatever else they may be doing it's that it can be far more harmful in excess when it begins to affect your daily life so if people are drinking alcohol every day smoking a joint every day where it's like they can't even function normally without it I think we can all agree that means that something is wrong I mean all right fair enough you want to have a drink sometimes you want to smoke a joint that's fine I'm not going to argue against it but how are you feeling without it if you can't feel good without having a drink without smoking a joint that means you're dependent on it that means that something is wrong with you because otherwise you would be fine without it I mean it's all right sometimes you want to be at a social setting with a bond and connect with people you want to have a drink smoke a joint if you feel like that helps to bring you together but then it's like what if you didn't have a drink what if you didn't smoke that joint but you still have anything together at all is that the only thing that's keeping you together as friends or in a relationship or whatever social setting it may be if it is then that's how you know it is fake that's how you know that it's not really a real friendship or relationship of meaning and substance because if it was it would go much deeper than that but then again it's whatever that means to you a lot of people in this world they're not really looking for anything of meaning or substance I'm quite happy to just go into bars and clubs I'm on a drink those are their friends that's their social circle they don't really talk about anything meaningful in life they're not discussing business they're not talking about gods they're not talking about what are moral and righteous activities and how we should do good for the world they're not really motivating encouraging or inspiring each other and if anything they're just bringing each other down they really are because you got to think all of that time they spend going to clubs drinking alcohol have a one-eyed stance smoking weeds this takes up a substantial amount of their time I mean it's not just like one evening because that can bleed into the next morning into the next afternoon sometimes it can affect them for several days whereas like they've had a few drinks they smoke some weeds and a few days even one week later they're still feeling kind of groggy they're not really the best out their best selves and what I would say to that is you know that means you've got to pull back it doesn't always mean that you've got to cut it off cold turkey completely that can be even more damaging sometimes if you do just go from you know especially if you drink an alcohol every day or you're smoking a joint every day if you just cut it off completely that can make you even worse because then you may have withdrawal symptoms and it may just cause you to go back to it even more quickly whereas you may not have and you may have given it up because you really gotta have those cravings then if you just cut out smoking weeds just give up alcohol what kind of be better is to just slowly decrease the dosage or the amount that you are using so let's say you're having one glass of wine every night what you might want to do is cut it down to one half a glass per night and then maybe half a glass every other day and then down to maybe two days a week one day a week until you just cut it out completely and it's the same thing with any unhealthy habits because that way you're easing off of it and when you ease off something then it won't be so noticeable to you mentally and emotionally it's kind of like when you're taking a like a prescription drug some drugs you they may be prescribed by a doctor of course I'm not a medical professional myself but just speaking on this from experience some drugs that you may be taking maybe for your mental health you do need to ease off of them and not go cold turkey because otherwise you will have those withdrawal symptoms so you may want to cut the tablet in half and then into one quarter until you finally come off it completely but of course when it comes to activities that are extremely immoral or illegal or that harm another person those types of activities you've got to cut it off completely I mean I don't think I'm speaking to anyone on here who was engaged in that but someone who may have been victimized I would like to speak for you here against other people who may be they're harming you they're abusing you people who are engaged in any type of crime that type of thing you shouldn't be easing off of that you should just cut it out completely and just immediately move in a healthy direction and if it affects you or rather if it affects that person the abuser the criminal if it makes them miserable depressed then that's this kind of their own problem but then at the same time they should have support they should have someone who is guiding them in that healthier direction away from being an abuser or even if it's an alcoholic they should have someone there to move them away from that as well because when we look at it like things like abuse whatever a type of abuse it may be it's still it can be likened to drugs and alcohol that's really what it is but then it's you know we're evolving other people and it's harmful to them so I mean well yes potentially it may pose some some form of benefit to them to reduce it gradually over time because where we're bringing other people involved who must consider the victims and the harmful effect that it's having on them and that's why it should just be cut off completely and the abusive individual of course yes they should be entitled to support the therapy and I think it's sad that we do live in a world where and I was thinking about this the other day we live in a world where therapy is not free and I'm not saying that people should become doctors and psychologists and have to provide their services for free I'm not saying that at all but what I am saying is that maybe it should be funded by governments or some kind of program because this is very important I mean if you look at the world today so many people are toxic and dysfunctional we see it everywhere especially in schools I mean this is something I've thought about a lot and this really bothers me because I find it very strange it's like why is psychology not taught in schools I mean this is something that should be taught from the very beginning things like our mental and emotional health and even our financial health as well this should be taught in primary or elementary schools from the very beginning and yet we're teaching our kids stuff that doesn't really matter in the real world but what about our psychological health because that is the most important thing in our lives the most important thing is our psychological health without that and nothing but no good to anyone without that and that's why I wonder why is this not taught in schools because it is very important but for whatever reason it's not and that's why individuals might like myself we must get on here and continue to spread awareness and I look at it as well in my analytics I can see that most of my viewers are actually over 18 I do have quite a few viewers who are aged 18 to 24 but the the 13 to 17 age group it's completely 0% which is quite worrying because that means that there's a lot of children out there who are involved in dysfunctional and toxic family dynamics where they may be being abused they may be scapegoated and they're not even aware of it they don't even know what is going on and it's horrible to think of that maybe that's why it's not taught in schools because immediately if they're teaching these things in schools about psychology abuse toxic people these kids are gonna start to look around at the other teachers in the school potentially their own head master or head mistress because many of them are like that many teachers are toxic many of them are narcissistic themselves and there's many children in the schools who are bullies and not only that but then when they go home they may start looking at their own parents and thinking wait a minute you're toxic yourself maybe you're a narcissist because of how you treat me and you abuse me so maybe that's why this isn't taught in schools maybe this is why so many children and teenagers are not aware of this because otherwise they're gonna start looking around and asking questions or maybe some of them they could be the narcissist themselves but then also our personalities are not fixed they're not formed until the age of 16 or 18 so before that age there's still time for some progress to be made and even then I think it is maybe it is possible for narcissists to become awakened of where I don't know if they can completely change if they did well the disorder cannot be cured as far as we know so far there have been no recorded cases of that in clinical environments but from what we know so far the behaviors can be changed but can they be consistently changed that is one question that's very difficult to answer it's perhaps the most difficult question to answer again it's quite worrying that these things aren't taught in schools but people are not aware of it because I would say from my research for the past six years our psychological mental and emotional health are the most important things in our lives and yet it's like the one thing that's not mentioned you can choose to take it on a degree in psychology if you want to even then that's more analytical theory it's not it's not more about an everyday life which is what we really need that's what we really need to be taught like things to do within our families our communities this is how we make things better for everyone but then of course it's not good for most people such as toxic people narcissists people who want to control abuse and exploit you of course it's not good for them and as you begin to discover this information and you explore the research and statistics you will find unfortunately this is the majority most people are like that and they see you when you're researching about this much like your arms like you're dangerous like you've got a weapon because that's pretty much what you're doing is you're arming yourself with this information because they're attacking you and you're using that as a form of self-protection and defense to protect yourself against harm because that's what they want to do is they want to harm you mentally they want to destabilize you so that they're better able to control you and that's why when you do acquire this knowledge and information a lot of people will turn against you and they will try to discredit you they will try to bring you down they will try to make you question yourself or make other people question you because when you're armed with this kind of knowledge and information you can make a lot of people look bad you can expose them and they don't want you to do that they want to continue to conceal it so that they can continue doing what they do exploiting people for their own personal gain because otherwise they just can't even survive the last thing they want to do is to look within themselves but this is why you have to your friends you don't fit in and this is a common theme that I noticed when I watch similar videos to this that I make it right now and I read the comments because I myself I find that I am quite drawn to those who are alone those who are isolated those who don't have that support network and they don't have many friends and I've always not just wanted not just wanted to but I have been that savior for many people in their lives who have been alone and I'm talking about things where I've seen people being mocked ridiculed they've had a group against them even many years ago when I was a child I was a teenager I saw children being bullied even attacked violently physically and I felt the need to step in and be there for them so I find myself to be drawn to these types of communities of the common sections where I like to share my experience and just helpful advice but I can give to help them to support them and what I find as I was going to say from seeing these communities and reading these comments it seems that these people who don't have friends and don't fit in they're looking at themselves and thinking that they're the problem as though something's wrong with them that's the funny thing about it they're never looking at it the other way around as though maybe it's something wrong with everyone else and maybe they don't assume that because it's like well look there's all of these people they all have friends they appear to be getting all well with their family they seem to be fitting into these communities I'm not so it must be me that's how they're thinking and what I would say to that is that sometimes you may be right sometimes that can be the case sometimes it could be you and maybe you are doing something wrong and that's the reason why you have no friends and they don't fit in so what you need to do to really test and to know whether or not it's you is to change these things about yourself start moving in a healthier direction start making progress start making amends for any things that you've done wrong I then see how many people you've got supporting you so many people are on your side that will then tell you if it's you or everyone else so I don't know about you but when I look back in my life and I'm sure many of you you will agree to this yourself if you've had someone in the past especially if it's been some time especially if it's been a few months a few years maybe they did something wrong to you in the past they hurt you maybe they lied to you maybe they stole from you if they want to come back to you into your life and it's like I'm sorry I did that I'm trying to change I want to make amends I want to make up for it I want to be the difference in your life I'm sure we would all agree we would give that person another chance if they're trying to make up for it they want to make amends you would give them another chance because most of us on here we're good people we're kind we're forgiving we're merciful we try to live in the image of God maybe in the image of Jesus for many of you who are watching this so that's how we try to be ourselves in our lives that's who we are but when you're dealing with toxic narcissistic dysfunctional people you can try and fit in and correct things and make amends but I guarantee you no matter what you do it's not going to change anything it's never going to be enough because the problem was never you it's not your problem to fix so no matter what you do you can have all of the training and qualifications in that area and you can have all the all of the tools but no matter what you do you're not going to be able to fix the problem because it's not you and that's how you know that it isn't you because remember like I said maybe someone did something to you in your past and if they came back and tried to make amends most likely you would give them another chance to correct it but of course there are exceptions here I mean if someone's extremely dangerous extremely harmful to you whereas like maybe they try to kill you or maybe it's someone who killed a close family member or friend of yours I mean if it was someone you didn't even know of course you know that may be different story but if it's someone who you know this is someone who affected your immediate family your immediate circle you might think twice about giving them another chance because what if they're dangerous and they do the same thing again but they're what we might want to look at in those situations is how much time has passed since they lasted that how much has passed since they last killed someone I'm talking about extreme situations here even raped someone stole from someone if they did that five years ago ten years ago and you can look at their life their part and you can see that progression you can see this person has changed an example that I can think of just off the top of my head could be Mike Tyson I mean there were he was actually convicted of rape I mean this was a long time ago now and also he bit a chunk of someone's ear I'm sure many of you you know we can't really forget that but now he seems to be more stable emotionally and he's become a vegan as far as I've heard he seems to be more on the right track he's more grounded he doesn't seem like such a bad dangerous person as he was before so that type of person you know maybe you might want to give them another chance to make amends but you know if they were really that bad you know when we're talking about things like rape murder theft you still might want to be quite careful with someone like that in your life you might want to not let them too close just in case you know you can still be on good terms with them you could still talk to them and you might want to be there for them to support them on their progression because of course if they progress if they develop a stable life for themselves where they're successful in their work they've got good relationships good friendships that's going to make it more likely for them to repeat the same mistake again because what happens with these types of people they engage in these harmful immoral and illegal activities it's because they're lacking the hope and belief in themselves to do things the right way so if they set out a path and they've got a little bit of hope and motivation in themselves and they manage to achieve some success and friendships relationships in their work life that's going to make it less and less likely for them to repeat the same offense again so that's why maybe we just inherently feel that way towards people who tend to be bad dangerous and we want to be there for them because we kind of know at some level that they do need the support you know they do need us they need friendships any relationships they need to have a good job a good work life because that's going to keep them on the correct path which is what we want for them but then there are some where it's like they don't want that for you and those are the ones who do not have any hope or belief in themselves those are the ones who when you look back at their life there's no progression no change it's still the exact same way that they've always been if you look back 10 20 30 years ago their life they're still that same person they just know how to hide it better now those types of people I'm not advocating for you to be around them at all I'm not telling you to put yourself in a dangerous harmful situation I would never do that of course I advise you to protect yourself whenever necessary I'm just saying that if someone is trying to change loosen the reins a little bit don't just give them free range where it's like okay now you have the freedom to be and do whatever you want whenever you want to do it of course that's going to be very dangerous but what you might want to do to as a test is loosen the reins give them a little bit of freedom to come into your life and then see what they do see how they respond to it and then you can give them a little bit more potentially at some point they may betray your trust and you given them that power they may betray it but at least then you will know and by just loosening the reins instead of just giving all of that freedom straight away you've then managed to cut your losses because it you could have lost a lot more if you had remained in that situation for longer and if you had given them all of your trust but I do believe as well if someone has made a mistake with you and it's like it wasn't a persistent mistake it was kind of an isolated incident where they did one thing wrong and it wasn't something that was like systematic or was calculated it was pre-planned pre-meditated and it was thought out like this is how I'm gonna get you this is how I'm gonna take you down sabotage your life ruin things for you I'm not talking about things like that of course people like that are extremely dangerous and you got to think twice before giving someone like that another chance but if it's something where it's like okay they slipped up you know normally there they're a nice person they're good they're kind they're thoughtful they're caring maybe a little bit naive and they just messed up they made one or two mistakes and you're not giving that person another chance I mean in these situations we've got a look at ourselves we really do because it's like are we not the problem with that type of person I'm talking about someone who made maybe one or two mistakes with us and it wasn't something that was pre-meditated calculated it wasn't something where they repeated it again and again and again and it was just completely cruel ruthless vindictive where they really they wanted to cause harm to you they wanted to bring you down if it wasn't like that and we're kind of like we're not given them that opportunity to apologize and come back and make amends to try and make things right sorry to say about our points the problem is you if you're dealing with that type of person and you're holding a grudge you're being resentful but I don't think I have to say sorry at all because I'm pretty sure most of you can see where I'm coming from in that you know there is a clear difference between the two types of personalities because whether we want to admit it on all the reality is we're all human and we all make mistakes none of us are perfect we're all gonna do something wrong from time to time and I know myself of course in my videos because I'm putting out so much content all of the time so many hours of work every week at some point I'm gonna slip up in someone's eyes someone's gonna watch my content and think I've got out of line I've said something hurtful and I apologize in advance if I've made someone feel that way the reality is that it's gonna happen if it hasn't already because I'm saying so much I'm giving so much information at some point I'm gonna say something wrong or I'm gonna offend someone because I'm being real and being true and being honest and open and if someone watches my work and something upset to offend them and then they would have unsubscribed that's really on them that's really on them because it's not like I'm I'm persistently on you and attacking you as some people may do and those types of people I mean if it's an individual or a group wherever it may be and it's like they have repeatedly cruelly and ruthlessly attacked you again and again and we're not talking like it's not like an amount of incidents that I can count on one hand just like there's so many incidents you couldn't even remember them all you can record them all you could even take note of everything that has happened I mean at some point if you were thinking to give people like that another chance you've got to be a fool to do that to ever think in a million years that they're gonna be anything different they're always gonna be that way I'm talking about something where it's like nine times out of ten like you could pick out like ten years of that person's life but they they made some mistakes that you can count on one hand and you're gonna demonize that person and also the intent did that person intend to do harm did they really did they intend to harm you that type of person you've got to give them another chance and at the same time you also got to understand that they are human and they could make a mistake again just as you could as well and you've got to look at yourself and that type of situation too but then when you're looking at where it's the type of person where it's like you don't even have to pick out ten years of that person's life you could cut it down to like the last ten minutes and all they do is just barrage you with insults constantly attack and there's no signs of anything changing and if you do look back at maybe at the last few weeks or months of their life they've always been doing that exact same thing clearly that person's not gonna change will improve they're gonna be that way for the rest of their lives most likely and if they did ever try to come back and fit in with you you better be very careful because they showed a consistent pattern of behavior whereas with us yes we're human we may make mistakes did we show a consistent pattern of behavior that was hurtful harmful ruthless and vindictive intended to destroy someone's happiness ruin someone's life I'm pretty sure I would hope that most of you that I'm talking to right now you won't do it anything like that or if you were if it was a long time ago and you've gone on that journey of personal growth and you can look back and it's like I'm not that same person anymore I'm better and more improved and I've made amends with those people that I hurt maybe that type of person we can give them another chance I mean if there is that journey of personal growth over several years I mean at some point we've got to be like yeah okay you know this person deserves another chance but then you've got to also look at yourself I mean you know that person they may have gone on that journey of personal growth but then it's like what about you they may be too good for you now unless you've also been doing that yourself so that that can be the case sometimes as well age definitely plays a part in things here but especially with those who are not and you can tell the difference when they're deliberately trying to take advantage or exploit and abuse their own age in order to receive certain privileges or certain exceptions from certain rules or whatever it may be but reality is that yeah age plays a big part in it when we're young we're inexperienced we're not at that same level of understanding I mean even when I look at like the prophets of God like Jesus he didn't really embark on his spiritual journey until he was in his late 20s early 30s and it's the same with the Buddha as well it wasn't until he was age 29 and even myself I didn't really embark on my spiritual journey and with my YouTube channel and my work that wasn't until I was age 29 as well so age can play a part in it but again it does depend on how vicious that person was how evil how wicked what kind of acts did they commit at that age because that can determine what they're going to be like for the rest of their lives as well I mean there has been some cases that I can remember I remember there was there was these I remember when I was in the supermarket actually as a child and my sister we were at the at the checkouts put in the shop and away in the bags and my sister mentioned the story to me about these these two two boys I don't even know how this happens and I think this this happens in the United Kingdom as well where I'm from but yeah these two boys they were not quite teenagers I think they're about eleven or twelve years old meant to be friends or something and somehow they found this child he may have been just three years old and they they took him away somewhere they did all of these horrible things to him all these sexual things and yeah they attacked him they threw rocks in him as well I think he had concussions and there was other things like he was abused sexually in horrific ways and then eventually they just left him on the train tracks waiting for the train to come to run him over and take his life this child was just two three years old and I remember quite some time ago I was curious about it when to see did these boys manage to move past that because of course they were only 11 to 12 years old and there was this it was a really big case in the UK I remember seeing the reports online there was all of these there were so much like reporters outside the courts they were like some of the youngest kids to be charged and to be given a life sentence and I looked back at this case a few years ago and funny enough one of the boys he was like just becoming an adult at that time and then he was charged again for viewing child pornography funny enough the children with a similar age of the child that he had abused with his friend at that time I did also involved it was sadistic taking pleasure in children's pain so maybe even children sometimes you know who sometimes you know we may think it's because they're inexperienced they don't really know what they're doing they're not really aware they're not really understanding maybe that's why maybe they do need that growth maybe they do know that supports and maybe that is right because I also remember looking back at that case and seeing this guy who you know we can argue he became a monster you know he was an adult I mean he's still alive today I think and he was still going back viewing this child pornography the sadism he still finds some kind of sick pleasure in that but I will admit I don't know I'm gonna get some stick for this I know but at the time when I was reading the reports of course I feel bad for the children as well but I actually see a guy who was let down by the police the courts and the society as a whole and I will say that because at one point this child was just 11 or 12 years old and yeah he did something wrong something horrific to the point where unfortunately the child who was two three years old lost his life but what are we not just continuing it are we not just prepared to eat them this pattern in society because you've got to look at like this that that was a still a child who was 11 to 12 years old and maybe the police the courts society failed him because something happened to him to get him to that point and maybe what should have been done is that he should have been taken into therapy he should have been given intensive mental support but instead they let him down and that's why but I saw it I saw the report again of how he was viewing this sadistic child pornography and in a way I actually felt bad for the guy I thought wow all of this time and you're still on this you still haven't moved past it you still haven't grown this is what you're doing with your life and it's like there's all of these potential opportunities for you out there all of these beautiful women who if you just worked on yourself you got better maybe they'd be interested in you they'd want to get to know you but no sadly can't remember the name but that guy who did those horrible things as a child he's still in that he's still doing the same things never moved past it and maybe the police the courts society are to blame the way they made such a big thing out of it brought it to the public and for what just to get media attention and to make money I mean come on that really is a joke exploiting a child the age of 11 12 years old and it's not just children it's also sorry I'm just doing something about it again it's also this is with a lot of people today teenagers young adults who may be in their early 20s they're getting caught up in some things and then it's like they get sent to prison they get all of this media attention they're in the newspaper their life is over that has completely ruined our life and it's like where do we draw the line how is this helping anyone how is this making anything better what should be done instead is they should be given the mental health support that they need because yes they do need that they do need special treatments in terms of mental health support and this should be funded by governments instead of like in the UK because the last thing I've seen is that it takes 30,000 pounds of taxpayers money every year to keep the just one prisoner locked up and no one's talking about this you know what I would prefer if they took that 30,000 pound and gave that prisoner that inmate the chance to improve their lives because why does it have to be all over for anyone and at least try even just for one year take that 30,000 pounds that it takes to keep them locked up and give them the mental health support that they need because although we can look at them we can hate them we could think this person's evil they're a criminal maybe they are murderer a rapist even a child molester and we can say that they failed us in society or not is it actually us who have failed them because if this was such a perfect society and everything's good everyone's happy as they make themselves out to be how would this ever happen and this is why we all carry this guilt and shame which we put on to them because deep down we know it's actually us as a collective we did that to them because they didn't have the proper support in childhood if they did then it never would have happened and yet we have the nerve to act like it's too late for them we have the nerve to think that way oh no why not give them another chance and I'm not saying just let them come out to the community so they could be a danger a risk to everyone again because of course most of them they're not going to go within and do the spiritual work the personal growth they're not going to do that instead they do need to be in a confined environment but why in a prison why in a jail how's that going to make that better for anyone all that's going to happen is they're going to associate with other people like themselves none of them are going to grow the orders going to be toxic losers together and then they're going to come back out into the community they're going to be even worse that's all that's going to happen this is why what should be done is that that money that's spent to keep them locked up that should be invested into going back to what I said before our mental emotional and psychological health put them into the proper institutions and even these places like these these mental asylums I mean these need to be locked out again clearly it's not a proper system they need to focus on their self-esteem more than anything else self-love that's what it all comes back to and clearly the courses or whatever they I don't know much about it in all honesty I can't say I've ever been to a mental asylum myself I mean but as far as I know there's some kind of courses that they have going on in there to try and work on their mental health and to keep them to give them some level of sanity but clearly it's not working and what what needs to be improved that there needs to be more focus on their self-esteem and creating a sense of identity but at the same time I can understand that's difficult as well because it's like how do you create a sense of identity when you're locked up in jail when a mental asylum when you're around other toxic people narcissists or even the prison guards the people who work in the mental asylums who may be crazy as well because let's be real not all of them are there to help they just love the power and control so sadly I guess what I'm trying to say is this whole system is just messed up it really is and as many of you have experienced some of the people on the streets they're worse than some of these criminals that's really how it is if you were to go into a jail you would see that they're the exact same thing they're just as bad they have just as much the lack of self-control the lack of discipline that's really how it is and yet if you get around people and you talk about this you try to be real you try to tell people how it is you try to tell them what you're not happy about and not also what you see in them but what you see in yourself and how you want to improve you want to grow you want to become better they're not gonna like it and it will be how it is for you where it's like you don't fit in you have no friends because most people aren't about that they're not about real shit they don't want to talk about it they don't want to explore the inner workings of their mind and wonder why they are a certain way why they drink every night why they take drugs why they're so toxic why they have to abuse people they don't want to talk about any of that they don't want to do the self exploration but many of us were on here that's what we had to do that's what I had to do I had to take accountability I had to look back myself of course on many occasions where it's like it wasn't always other people I was toxic myself I was arguing and it's like people would call me names I would call them names back I would just go down into it I'd feed into the toxic toxicity someone would hit me I'd hit them back and I'd think oh no that's fine because they hit me they abused me they called me names so it's okay for me to do that but at some point I come to this realization where it's like just because they did that it doesn't mean I have the right to do it back I realized that that's still me just because someone does something to me it doesn't mean that I can just disconnect from my actions behaviors and it's like okay I have the entitlement I have the right to do whatever I want now unfortunately yeah you know that's that's how I used to think in the past but at the same time I can empathize I can understand those of you who do get pushed into reactive abuse because yes that is the thing and it's something that we do talk about on here as well when narcissists push or provoke you to the point where it's like you lose control over yourself and sometimes they may involve other people and it's like they're all there constantly calling your names putting the finger at you making you feel bad about yourself other than at some point you say something back you lash out and it's nothing in comparison to what they're saying and doing to you and yet straight away they'll point the finger at you make you feel like a bad person because that's what they really want that's really what they want that's what a lot of people want in this world this is why things go the way that they do they don't want you to be better they want to have the opportunity to call you a bad person to make it out like there's something wrong with you that's why with a lot of these people who are criminals psychopaths there's no help for them I mean I'm not saying that they can't be helped I'm saying no one is willing to help them because maybe that provides them with a sense of identity for themselves where it's like there's nothing wrong with me you're bad you're crazy you're evil that's what makes me feel better up myself it's sad but that's just how it is in the world today it's really sad and I can look at that on my earlier journey on YouTube as well of course I can self-reflect and take accountability but it's like yeah of course a lot of things were done to me I mean I have been through possibly the worst some of the worst imaginable abuse that can be done to a human being so naturally in my earlier journey on YouTube I did get on here and I derived a sense of identity from blaming everyone else you know blaming all the narcissists in my life where it's like yeah you're bad you're evil you've done these horrific things and now I'm I'm like this good Samaritan I'm perfect I'm like this this mediator between people now online I would say that yes that's how it was for me earlier on my journey on YouTube but now as you may have seen I even worked with a self-aware diagnosed COVID narcissist just a couple of months ago on a live video on YouTube because now my sense of identity comes from something else it comes from God our Creator and from wanting everyone to elevate with us instead of bringing other people down and creating this us versus them mentality because when you do that all you're driving from that is a false identity and it just alienates you from people what we need is a community of togetherness but at the same time also having that self-protection because we don't we don't want to get ourselves into another situation like that again but then at the same time we need to be inclusive while also taking the precautions and minimizing the effect that it has on us I will say it is easier said than done it really is I mean there are a lot of good a lot of good people out there who are in positions of authority whether it's the police officers medical workers even psychologists even people who work in the prisons and the mental asylums there are people in those possessions who don't abuse their power and they are doing the best that they can so you know it is easier said than done it really is and some people do look at it like you know we can't bring people together and just elevate moving to the fourth dimension fifth dimension and this kind of thing it's easy to say that it really is but to actually go out and do it it's something else which again brings me back to the topic of why people like us we have no friends and we don't fit in because maybe we don't want to be that person we don't want to be that person to fit in and to give people another chance maybe because the type of people were around we already know what's going to happen if we do that so maybe that's why we shut ourselves off and we keep to ourselves and that's why we just can't find the strength to trust anyone but then it gets to a point when you've been hurt so many times where it's like you can be strong and just still not want to trust anyone because it's like you can already reject you already know exactly what's gonna happen again but what it all comes back to is our frequency of vibration and I can tell you that and it does kind of go back to what I said earlier but all of these people like you see these narcissists toxic people psychopaths even people that you see or rather you may not see them but they're in mental asylums and in prisons the criminals what all of these people have in common and there is no exception to this rule it's the same for all of them what they all have in common is that they're suffering from low self-worth and low self-esteem they lack self-love maybe they lack an identity and they're operated from a very low vibration the very low frequency whether it's shame fear guilt pride so that's really what it is and if they could just raise their vibration consistently that would solve everything it would change the world now that's why of course when you look on the news what do you see 99% of it is negative it's pessimistic it's made to just make you think so horrible about everyone in the world and as though there's all of these calamities all of this disaster it's primarily negative and even on YouTube the content that gets pushed the most is negativity and it's in the music movies celebrity drama and gossip it's just everywhere that you look and you have things like psychology mental health these things are not talked about in communities they're not taught in schools because quite clearly there is an agenda this is exactly how they want it to be because they want to keep people down that's why maybe with some of my videos I mean I'm sure many of you notice and it's almost like they're not getting as many views as they should be I mean what I'm giving to you after my years of research my years of work I'm giving you cutting edge information I'm giving you the raw truth and it's like the YouTube algorithm does not support it it's not getting as many views as it should be because based on the value that it provides this is very high value content it has the potential to change people's lives it changed my life and I know it's changed many of your lives as well and yet based on the value that it provides it's not receiving the recognition that it deserves and unfortunately this is a lot this is happening with a lot of content today the most meaningless mindless garbage out there it's really receiving so much attention and recognition but then it's like when it comes to this type of information it's a minority or even if it even if it is some people are watching they don't keep coming back to it they might watch one video and then it's not something they're consistently practicing in their lives and this is it as well I mean really we need that discipline we need that consistency because I'll say it myself I mean of course sometimes I do feel a temptation I do feel like going back in especially when there aren't many alternatives many other options I do feel like it could be easier more convenient but of course sometimes even though I've been a vegan for so many years and I haven't had a drink for six years sometimes to get a bit stressed of course sometimes I feel like what if I had a drink maybe that would make me feel better or there's no vegan options around here what if I did just start you to meet it again and that's normal the problem is when we alienate ourselves and it's like we're bad now we should feel shame believe it or not that's shame could make it more likely for you to repeat that again where you're going back into it into unhealthy habits because you're seeking the comfort even while it may be a unhealthy coping strategy it's that shame it's that low vibration I guess going so deep into it I am kind of I am trying to seek a sense of resolve from this message what exactly that is I don't know at this point I honestly don't know what the answer is still it's still progression for me I mean it's still a work in progress even though I've come this far I know I'm not perfect I know I'm never gonna be perfect I know it's only ever gonna be a work in progress and it's trial and error sometimes I might slip up I might make mistakes but I've still got that desire I've got that motivation and that incentive to keep going so for myself or my journey that's all that I can really do and I'm sure it will be the same for you I guess the answer really is just to as it says in the religious books as it says in the Bible as God has said to let go of our pride and accept I guess we are human we're not perfect and just as we built these communities online it's like whatever we feel like going back you know when we go no contact and we want to go back into it into the abuse to the toxic toxic environments we need that support we need each other we need people who have common interests and goals so like myself I guess you could say what I need is other people who are vegan as well so when there aren't many options and I do get tempted I got someone there who's there to make me feel better cheer me up instead of cause me to go back into it but I've been lucky because I have been disciplined enough even without any vegan friends I've managed to sustain it for four and a half years not eating meat six years without drinking alcohol but then I do have all of you on YouTube and other youtubers that I watch as well who have supported me along my journey but definitely I've said that myself in previous videos it is about setting those strong boundaries between us and other people who are not like ourselves until they are finally ready to join us on that journey we set that boundary and it's like this is what we will tolerate this is who I am this is what I'm about I'm a vegan I don't drink alcohol I don't smoke you might but I don't and other than that it's also about having that strong support network as well with a like-minded people who will motivate and encourage you and I know I came here to be that for you that's my mission that's that's my purpose is to be this leader and to provide this support network for you so that you don't go back into it and you do continue on the journey that is more beneficial for you so that's my job that's my mission it's to bring like-minded people together who are wanted to elevate raise their vibration and engage in healthier interests and activities so that's really yet to conclude on this message today really just the talk of life something that I believe that everyone needs to cure no matter what age they are we all need to have this awareness and understanding of this instead of going back into it into the mud into the mess fortunately it's where a lot of people these days to be they will need to join them in that I will continue to support you as I've said before I will never give up I will die doing this this is my mission this is my purpose and I will be doing this till the very end and you can support me on my mission on my purpose of elevating you by hitting that thumbs up button down below donating to our community as well by leaving a super chat the live chat a super thanks in the comment section down below or by going to my PayPal it is PayPal.me-survivor let me know what you think about this video in the comment section down below I do take the time every day to read your comments and to respond to as many as I can hit subscribe and click on the notifications to be notified when I upload a new video and if you would like to book a coaching session with me just go to my website it is narksurvivor.co.uk and also check on my Instagram I have new pictures and videos of my travels which I upload to my stories every day on there it's narksurvivor YouTube on Instagram I just like to thank you all for joining me on another live video one of many more to come I appreciate you all thank you all for your support and as always I will speak to you in another live video very soon