 Chapter 18 of John's Gospel, we're going to be looking at verses 12 through 27, and I chose to entitle this, Steps to Denial. And I'm going to teach you how to backslide, because that's what we're going to see here in a moment. We're going to be seeing things that led up to the denial of Jesus Christ by His beloved Apostle Peter. And what we have here is we actually have so much information, we're going to begin to give you all the information and tie it all together in its chronological and proper order. I'd have to do several studies in order to complete that task. And so I'm going to try and give you a synopsis, really a smaller amount of information, but hopefully it'll help us to understand what's taking place in the verses before us. And so we'll begin reading at verse 12, and I'm going to read to verse 27. But you're going to see I'm going to be breaking this up into sections in a moment. But I'll begin at verse 12. John writes in John 18, verse 12, then the detachment of troops and the captain and the officers of the Jews arrested Jesus and bound him, and they led him away to Annas first, for he was a father-in-law of Caiaphas, who was high priest that year. Now it was Caiaphas who advised the Jews that it was expedient that one man should die for the people. And Simon Peter followed Jesus, and so did another disciple. Now that disciple was known to the high priest and went with Jesus into the courtyard of the high priest, but Peter stood at the door outside. Then the other disciple who was known to the high priest went out and spoke to her who kept the door and brought Peter in. Then the servant girl who kept the door said to Peter, you are not also one of this man's disciples, are you? And he said, I'm not. Now the servant and officers who had made a fire of coal stood there for it was cold, and they warmed themselves, and Peter stood with them and warmed himself. The high priest then asked Jesus about his disciples and his doctrine. Jesus answered him, I spoke openly to the world, I always taught in synagogues and in the temple where the Jews always meet, and in secret I've said nothing, why do you ask me? Ask those who have heard me what I said to them, indeed they know what I said. And when he had said these things, one of the officers who stood by struck Jesus with a palm of his hand saying, do you answer the high priest like that? Jesus answered him, if I have spoken evil, bear witness of the evil, but if well, why do you strike me? Then Anna sent him bound to Caiaphas, the high priest. Now Simon Peter stood and warmed himself, therefore they said to him, you are not also one of his disciples, are you? He denied it and said, I'm not. One of the servants of the high priest, a relative of him whose ear Peter cut off said, did I not see you in the garden with him? Peter then denied again, immediately a rooster crowed. Once in a while we'll hear news of a believer, somebody perhaps we knew well, a friend. We hear news of a believer who has backslidden. We may have known him, we may have at one time considered them to be a strong Christian and when we hear that they have backslidden we're surprised. We begin to ask ourselves a simple question, how could something like that happen? How could somebody who at one time went to church regularly, served the Lord, maybe even went on mission trips? Somebody that I knew was a very dedicated believer, how is it that they backslid? What led this believer to turn away from the Lord? To even go so far as to deny ever knowing him, well in the passage before us, we have an opportunity of seeing how this kind of thing can happen. We're going to see how a man known as the Rock, because that's what Jesus had called him. We're going to see how this man known as the Rock came to the point of denying Jesus Christ. And we'll see that in just a moment, but as we lead up to that, let me give you some of the information that's before us, and then we'll lead up to the steps to backsliding which we're going to look at and close our study by spending time looking at that. So anyway, as we see, and last time we're together, Judas had completed his work of betrayal, Judas had identified Jesus and he had made it possible for Jesus to be arrested and to be taken. Now earlier in that evening, the apostle Peter had made it very clear that he was the one who would be faithful to Jesus. As a matter of fact, as we all know, Peter was a man who was a great passion and a great love for Christ, and he even declared himself that he would have been the most faithful of all the apostles of Jesus Christ. But Jesus had made it clear to him, no, I'm going to be betrayed and I am going to be abandoned. And when Jesus had said that in Matthew 26, 33 through 35, Matthew writes that Peter answered and said to him, even if all are made to stumble because of you, I will never be made to stumble. And Jesus said to him, assuredly I say to you that this night before the rooster crows, you will deny me three times. And Peter said to him, even if I have to die with you, I will not deny you. And so said all the disciples. So there was a tremendous passion in the heart of the apostle Peter. And when Jesus said that they would deny him, he would be betrayed. And all that was going to take place, his immediate response, the apostle Peter's immediate response was, I will never do that. If I have to die with you, I will do that. Peter thought that he could die. He thought that these things Jesus was speaking about could not happen. But Jesus knew otherwise. In Luke 22, 31 through 33, when all of this is taking place and when the apostle Peter is saying, if I have to die with you, I will. Well, in Luke's gospel, Luke records how the Lord said to him, Simon, Simon. Indeed, Satan has asked for you that he may sift you as wheat. But I prayed for you that your faith should not fail. And when you have returned to me, strengthen your brethren. But Peter said to him, Lord, I'm ready to go with you, both to prison and to death. Satan has desired you, is what Jesus said. When Jesus said Satan has asked for you, there is within that phrase, the acknowledgement of Satan having to ask permission to sift God's children. He has asked for you, and the inference is that he has obtained permission to do so. So Satan is going to sift you. He's going to shake you to the core. Satan has asked for you that he may sift you as wheat. But Jesus had also added, but I prayed for you that your faith does not fail. And when you're converted, when you come back to me and you return to me, strengthen your brethren. Well, Peter had said I would die for you. I would lay my life down for you, and as we saw, when Jesus was taken, it appeared that Peter would make good on his boast. Because when the soldiers were about to take him and they came to take Jesus, Peter drew his sword and he attacked Luke tells us in chapter 22 verses 50 and 51. One of them struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his right ear. Jesus answered and said, permit even this. And he touched his ear and healed him. Peter and the others had to learn that they weren't as strong in faith as they thought they were. They desired to be faithful to the end, but their true weakness was exposed openly. Because when Jesus was taken, they did exactly what he said they would do. And Mark 14 verse 50, it simply says they all forsook him and fled. So that reveals something, even as we begin, that reveals the foolishness of relying on our own strength when we're in the midst of a spiritual battle. There's the scripture you might want to mark down. 1 Corinthians 10-12, let him who thinks he stands take heed lest you fall. The one who boasts in his own strength is doomed to failure. Be very careful that you don't boast in your own strength. We need to glory if we glory at all in the Lord. Because he's the one who provides us with the strength. And we're gonna see this in a moment in the life of the apostle Peter. You see, they needed to understand something. Something they were yet to understand. They needed to know that Jesus' death was a reason that he had come in the first place. And they had failed to understand this. They didn't really recognize or understand what Jesus had explained as the plan of redemption. He had already in John in chapter 3 verse 16, the most famous scripture in the New Testament. He had already made it clear that God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son. He had already made it clear that he was gonna lay his life down like a grain of wheat that's gonna fall into the ground and dive so that it can produce fruit. He's been telling them that all along. But they haven't understood it yet. The detachment of troops and the temple officers came. They arrested Jesus and they bound him. When it speaks of a detachment, the detachment were what you would refer to as the Roman soldiers. They were stationed at a fortress called the Antonia Fortress. When it speaks of the detachment of troops and the officers, the officers were a security force. They were under the authority of the chief priest. It was a mixture of Romans and Jewish temple police that came and took Jesus Christ. And that's what they came to do. So in verse 12, it says, the detachment of troops and the captain and the officers of the Jews arrested Jesus and bound him. Verse 13, they led him away to Annas first for he was father-in-law to Caiaphas, who was high priest that year. And so he speaks here concerning the fact that there are a couple of men mentioned. One's name is Annas and the other is Caiaphas. Annas is referred to, but he is the former high priest. Annas is the former high priest. He had great influence. He was the power behind the office. And history tells us that he had five sons who also held the office of high priest. This man, Caiaphas, was not his blood son. He was his son-in-law. He mentions to us about Caiaphas, but he also goes on and says in verse 14. And by the way, Caiaphas was the actual high priest. Annas was the former high priest. But it goes on to describe or tell us about him in verse 14, when it says, it was Caiaphas who advised the Jews that it was expedient that one man should die for the people. We had seen that earlier in the 11th chapter how he had made that statement, that it's expedient, even as he says, that one man should die. Not knowing that he was speaking concerning the death of Christ as the savior of the world. So as this is taking place, verse 15, Simon Peter followed Jesus. So did another disciple. Now that disciple was known to the high priest, went with Jesus into the courtyard of the high priest, but Peter stood at the door outside. Then the other disciple who was known to the high priest went out and spoke to her, who kept the door and brought Peter in. And so what we have here is we have a picture of Apostle Peter and an unnamed disciple. It says in verse 18, the servants and officers who had made a fire of coal stood there, for it was cold, and they warmed themselves, and Peter stood with them and warmed himself. And so there's your picture. And what we have are two events that are being outlined. We have Jesus' trial before Annas, and we have Peter's denial of Jesus. And I'm going to look at both of those events separately. Jesus' trial that he's going to go through began between Peter's first and second denial. So we're going to be looking at Jesus' first Jewish trial, and that was before Annas. You see in verse 19 it says, and the high priest asked Jesus about his disciples and doctrine. Now the high priest, when it says the high priest, and even though it's referring to Annas, it's a way of addressing him, the way that when a president is no longer in office, he's still called Mr. President. Well, they're still referring to him as a high priest. It's simply a title of respect. And what we have here is an interrogation, and he's asking actually concerning a couple of things. One, he's asking concerning Jesus' disciples, but he's also asking him concerning his doctrine. What it is, he wants information about his disciples. He's wanting to know how many disciples he has. What are their names? What are their addresses? What families do they belong to? And so he begins to do that in verse 19. He asks Jesus about his disciples and his doctrine. Verse 20, Jesus responds, he answers him, I spoke openly to the world. I always taught in synagogues in the temple where the Jews always meet. In secret, I've said nothing. Why do you ask me? Ask those who have heard me what I said to them. Indeed, they know what I said. And so Jesus responds. Notice how he ignores the question, but he draws attention to himself. He is speaking concerning himself because he wants to draw the attention from the disciples and from those who might be harmed. And he says in verse 20, I spoke openly. In other words, my teachings are a matter of public record. My doctrine is well known. If you want testimony of what I've said, well ask those who have listened to me. Now there's a reason Jesus is doing this. You see, under Jewish law, witnesses must be produced to establish the weight of a case. John 8.17 made it clear that it is written in the law that the testimony of two men is true. So there needs to be witnesses to establish the weight of the case. And so what Jesus is really doing here is he's asking for a fair trial. He's saying, I want to bring witnesses here so they can speak concerning what I've said so I don't self incriminate. In verse 22, when he had said these things, one of the officers who stood by struck Jesus with a palm of his hand saying, do you answer the high priest like that? Jesus answered him, if I've spoken evil, bear witness of the evil. But if well, why do you strike me? That man is very fortunate that Jesus didn't turn his hand into a foot. What he did is he saw that Jesus was actually challenging Annas. And the response that we see is one of anger, which was, by the way, if you take notes, it's illegal to strike a prisoner in that fashion, according to the Old Testament book of Deuteronomy chapter 25 verses one through three. See, what Jesus is doing is he's asking for proof of anything he said that was illegal. And so when he did that, it caused the outburst. Well, verse 24 says, Anna sent him bound to Caiaphas, the high priest. Seeing that Jesus wouldn't give him any information, he sent him away. This is because if a legal charge is to be brought, it has to be brought through the high priest. Now, we know Caiaphas. Caiaphas was involved in the plot against Jesus. A few days before the elders of the people had assembled at the, a few days before they, they had assembled the house of Caiaphas. And they had gathered together to plot against Jesus that he might be taken and he might be killed. And so John doesn't record what took place before Caiaphas, but if you want to do that so that you can on your own study that Matthew 26 verses 57 through 75, give us the details concerning that. And so Jesus is basically going before Annas. Then he went before Caiaphas. You could look up what happened before Caiaphas by looking at Matthew, but I want to spend time looking at the denial that came through Peter because that's really the heart of what I wanted to share with you tonight. We're going to be looking at Simon Peter's denial of Jesus Christ. I'll begin by giving a couple of details and then we'll move into it. The events that, of that evening, are actually transpiring over several hours. They actually began, the things actually began to roll and downhill at around nine o'clock at night. And it's continuing on until three a.m. in the morning. So this is a long process. And what you have here is you have the apostle Peter and you have another disciple. I want to look at that with you. I'll remind you again of verse 15 when it said, Simon Peter followed Jesus so did another disciple. And so who was this other disciple? More than likely it was John. Now notice how it says that the other, in verse 16, the other disciple was known to the high priest. We know that John had important friends. He's the one who mentioned a man by the name of Nicodemus and he's the one who mentioned Joseph of Arimathea. These were very highly regarded individuals. And so it's more than likely John, because in the Gospel of John, John does not self-identify. He always speaks in this fashion. Mostly he'll say the one whom Jesus loved. But in this he's just referring to himself, I believe, as the other disciple. And so we're coming now to Peter's denial. Verse 17, the first denial. The servant girl who kept the door set to Peter, you are not also one of this man's disciples, are you? And he said, I'm not. Now two other times who will be identified as a follower of Jesus when we get to verses 25 through 27, this is the first denial. All three times Peter denies that he knows the Lord Jesus Christ. Why? How did this happen? What steps did Peter take that ended up with his denying Jesus Christ? Let me give you steps to denial. The first, how is it that he denied him? One, he overestimated his spiritual strength. He overestimated his own spiritual strength. The Apostle Peter had a higher regard for his own loyalty to Jesus than he had for the word that Jesus had spoken to him. Proverbs 29, 23 says, a man's pride brings him low, but a man of lowly spirit gains honor. He relied too much on his own strength. This was a man who had a tremendous walk with the Lord. I mean, I began to think of the life of the Apostle Peter to highlight this, but there's so many things we see of him in Scripture it would be really impossible for me to actually point that out. We know that he's the first man that is mentioned in all the lists of the Apostles. The very first one who's ever mentioned when the Apostles are listed, the 12th, the first one that's ever mentioned is always the Apostle Peter. He had said that the Apostle Peter was basically the leader of the Apostolic group. He's a man, when you look at him, of great passion and a man of tremendous loyalty, and this is a man of incredible influence. That was the Apostle Peter. You see when he's with Jesus how he did things that the others didn't. It was the Apostle Peter who, when Jesus came walking, as if he were going to pass a boat, when they were in the midst of a storm and they were rowing furiously and they saw Jesus walking on water. It was the Apostle Peter who saw Jesus and said, Lord, if it's you, command me that I should come out of this boat and come to you. Jesus said, come. We see that story of how the Apostle Peter climbs over the side of a boat and he walks on water. All of us, because we don't have the ability to really fashion within our own mind a true understanding of how remarkable that is simply because we're in a room right now, but if you put yourself in a position of being on a boat in the middle of the Sea of Galilee in the midst of a storm and the water is cresting and it's unstable and the people are afraid and they're thinking they're going to drown. Then you have this man, Peter, and he's calling out to that one, walking on water and the others are there in the boat and they're saying, Peter's the only one who's saying, I'll walk out there. The other ones, they're not saying anything. Nobody says anything about what they're saying, you know, at all. You got Judas taking bets and you got Thomas doubting that he's going to be able to make it, but that's about it. Then he says, come and the Apostle steps out and walks on water as if it's concrete. I can't fathom that. I've been on the Sea of Galilee many times. We've been on the Sea of Galilee in times when it's not storming, but the waves, but it's a rough water and the idea of that. Well, think about it. The Apostle Peter did that. The Apostle Peter was there when Jesus was transfigured on the Mount Transfiguration. The Apostle Peter saw the glory of God. It was the Apostle Peter there in Caesarea Philippi when Jesus said, who do men say that I, the Son of Man, am? And Apostle Peter is the one who said, Thou art the Christ, the Son of the living God. And that's when Jesus said, Blessed are you, Simon by Jonah, flesh and blood is not revealed this to you but my Father in heaven. It was the Apostle Peter who received the revelation from God himself of who Jesus Christ is. And this was a man who was a leader. This is a man who was courageous. This is a man who had faith. This is a man who was declared to be one who had been given insight by God himself. And this was a proud man because when Jesus said, you're going to deny me, he said, I will never deny you. I would die for you. And you want to know something? I believe that that with every beat of his heart, every fiber of his being, the Apostle Peter believed that he would die for him because when he drew that sword and when he tried to kill that man, Melchus, it demonstrates to us he was very serious that he would lay his life down in the midst of all those soldiers, tortures, torches and lanterns and all the commotion. This man drew a sword and he said, let's go down. That was Peter. I love men like the Apostle Peter really do because he had courage but he also had had pride. His spirit was willing. Jesus knew but his flesh was weak. That's why Jesus had said that to them that night. Just that night, Matthew 2641, watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing but the flesh is weak. You want to do the right thing. The will is present. The ability to perform that which you desire is not. The spirit is willing. Paul in Romans 7.18 said, I know that nothing good lives in me that is in my sinful nature for I have the desire to do what is good but I cannot carry it out. Do not overemphasize your self-reliance. Do not overemphasize your faith. Do not think that you can stand because sometimes the one who thinks he's standing is going to fall. One, he had too much confidence in himself. How do I end up backsliding? I end up first and foremost by overestimating my own strength and not recognizing my own weaknesses. Secondly, Peter followed Jesus but he did so that night at a distance. He was afraid of being identified as a follower of Jesus Christ. In Luke 22 verse 54, Luke says, having arrested him, they led him and brought him into the high priest's house and Peter followed at a distance. Believers are not to be ashamed of being identified as followers of Jesus Christ. We're not to be ashamed. I am not ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I'm not ashamed of the one who died on the cross for me. Jesus said, if you're ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you. We're not to deny him. We're not to follow him at a distance. There are a lot of people who profess to be Christians who are following at a distance. They don't want to be too closely identified. They kind of want to be a Christian but they are too ashamed for people to know that. When I was in college, I began to learn that because I didn't always go to Christian college. I went to secular college also and I made a determination as a young man that when I went into class that one of the first things if given opportunity that I would do is I would declare myself a follower of Jesus Christ. I wasn't one of those guys who hid that light under a basket. I didn't do that. I figured I might as well declare openly who I am and what I am and take whatever is going to come because I wasn't going to be a closet Christian and I never was. I wasn't that guy who went to class and just kind of sat there quietly as the silent majority. I was the guy who when given opportunity to which share I would talk about the Lord and it was not in a Christian college. It would be in a secular college and they're not always open to hearing what you have to say as you know in secular colleges. I mean I had university professors who one of them in particular I'll always remember him how he said how many of you are Christians and he had us raise our hands and out of class of 25 or 30 there were four or five who raised their hands first day of class and the first thing he said to us is I feel sorry for you because you believe in that little black book and I believe called a Bible and I believe in science and in scientific studies. That was our introduction to this particular class and he's the one who told us that he said it's there are some studies that say that smoking cigarettes can lead to cancer but I have a whole pile of studies that that prove otherwise that that smoking does not lead to cancer and he died of lung cancer that's how he died. He put his trust in science and and all of that and and ridiculed us this is a man who had multiple marriages he couldn't keep a marriage together but he pitied me and so I learned very early that that the world is going to make statements and and lodge charges and are going to try and make you look bad and make you feel stupid and indeed they can and and you will but I also knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that though I may not be able to articulate deeply the things I believe I most firmly hold fast to them no matter what I always did and I would open my mouth and I would declare who I was and and what I what I believed I was in one class it was a California history class and the professor there were 30 or so students again and the professor said that each one of you is going to be given something like three minutes and every one of you will address the class you're all going to walk up and speak and whatever subject I give you you will speak on and so I sat there in the class and week after week and finally it was my turn and he called on me and he said David he said it's your opportunity to speak on on the subject I'm giving to you and he says and what I want you to speak about is freedom and so I got up and and I shared with the class you know and I still remember some of what I said I said when you say freedom I said I want you to know that I'm a Christian and that Jesus Christ said you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free and that every person in this room who doesn't know Jesus Christ is in bondage you're all in bondage to sin but Jesus Christ came to die on a cross so that he could set you free and you need to receive Christ as your Lord and your Savior that you might have the freedom that comes to Christ and Christ alone and it got very quiet because Christian people didn't hear things like that in secular school and then one woman who had been kind of loud anyway she she goes hallelujah she was the other Christian in the class and I'll never forget that and the professor said you don't say much but when you say when you speak you say a lot so when given opportunity speak the name of Jesus Christ do not follow him at a distance and that's what the apostle Peter was doing he followed at a distance we are not ashamed of the gospel and we're not ashamed of being identified as one of his in 2nd Timothy 1 verse 8 do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord or ashamed of me his prisoner but join with me in suffering for the gospel by the power of God now verse 18 tells us notice at the end of that verse that Peter stood with them and warmed himself Luke tells us in chapter 22 verses 55 through 57 when he had kindled kindled a fire in the midst of the courtyard and sat down together Peter sat among them and a certain servant girl seeing him as he sat by the fire looking intently at him and said this man was also with him but he denied him saying women I do not know him but I want you to notice how John points it out because in verse 17 she also had said you are not also one of this man's disciples are you he said I'm not I'll return to that in just a moment so what is the problem here he tried to blend in with the world he tried to blend in with the world he sat with them Peter stood with them and warned warmed himself he tried to blend in with them we're in the world but we are not of the world we are distinguishable because our lives by the very nature of the things that we believe that provoke the things that we do our very lives are to be in contrast with the way the people of the world live Ephesians 5 11 says have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness but rather expose them in first Peter 4 3 and 4 the apostle writes for we have spent enough of our past lifetime in doing the will of the Gentiles when we walked in lewdness and lusts drunkenness revelries drinking parties abominable idolatries in regard to these they think it's strange that you do not run with them in the same flood of dissipation speaking evil of you be careful that you don't try to blend in with the world no i'm not saying that you should paint yourself a different color or something to stand out but be careful that you don't go along with the things of the world how do i how do i illustrate that when i was working a job prior to going into full-time ministry i had a a supervisor i worked with who was a porn addict and he would bring his pornography to the office and i shared with him the gospel i told him i was a believer and he thought it would be funny to try and mock my faith which he did and i used to have to do things i had to file different things and all and i still remember opening up the filing cabinet and there's a centerfold there that's opened up and and the guys who did it thought it was funny and and you know that's what they do that's what guys can do if they don't know the lord it didn't make me mad at them i just realized that that's what that's what guys do they're stupid what are you gonna do but i at the same time i was real open and vocal about my faith in christ and uh and i was willing to stand up and and and be different and and show a difference in the way that i lived and again i'm speaking about when i was a younger man and there was an older man a man who was my father's age and i was about 26 at the time and this man was in his late 40s and uh he was one of the guys who had speak to me on occasion and tell me that he was a believer in christ that he went to church and all of that and yet i saw him as he was opening up porn and looking at it with the guys and all and one day he and i were talking and i told and he knew my my father-in-law because he was from this area he knew my father-in-law so it kind of gave me an in with him and i still remember having a conversation with him at in the on the job and um and i said something about him looking at porn i see you look at porn huh was yeah yeah i i said you know i said you're emotionally immature now i'm 26 years old i'm telling a man almost 50 he said you're emotionally immature and he said what do you mean by that he got a little insulted i said what do i mean by that are you married he goes yeah and your wife doesn't satisfy you well i said and so what you do is dishonor her by looking at pictures of other women and lusting after him i thought you told me that you go to church i thought you told me you're a follower of jesus christ and yet here you are watching this looking at this laughing with the guys over that dishonoring your your wife and dishonoring your god i said no you gotta make a decision to do the right thing and the right thing is to avoid getting involved with that and that's how i was why do you think god put me into ministry because i would tell people this is what god says and this is what we ought to do and this is how you honor him and the next day he walks up to me and i thought he was hurt and in i don't know if he was or not but i do remember he walked up and said you know i've been thinking about what you told me yesterday and you're right you're right he says i'm gonna get away from that i'm not gonna look at that anymore because you're right if i'm gonna be if i'm a believer in god i need to honor him don't hide your faith you will be surprised don't blend in don't be that person who's nodding there at the dirty jokes and laughing at the things when you disagree with those things don't do that i made a decision when i was on the job site that if i had to eat by myself i would eat by myself i didn't need to be one of the guys i didn't need to be liked i didn't have that desire because i've always from as long as i can remember i've wanted to hear the well done from jesus christ and that has motivated my life for many years now the well done the well done do the right thing be a good example testify of the grace of god and don't hide that light don't be ashamed of the gospel of jesus christ don't blend in with the world because that's what the apostle tried to do he blended in with the world standing there with them at the fire of the world and then fourth he was given an easy root of denial if you look at the first two questions in john they are posed in a way that made it easy for him to say no in verse 17 notice you are not also one of this man's disciples are you he said i'm not look at verse 25 simon peter stood and warmed himself therefore they said to him you are not also one of his disciples are you and he died denied it and said i am not it was easy for him to deny it they they couched it in such a way that he could easily say no i am not but when a direct challenge occurred he had already been led towards the denial you see in matthew 26 73 and 74 matthew says a little later those who stood by came up and said to peter surely you also are one of them your speech betrays you and he began to curse and swear saying i don't know the man immediately a rooster crowed when they said your speech betrays you you need to remember that northern and southern israel had different accents he was a Galilean he had an accent that was a Galilean go into new york go into brooklyn go into queens and they have an accent and you'll pick it up go to different places go into some places in texas they have an accent you'll pick it up well even in that small country of israel there was an accent and the northern accent was different than the southern accent and so they said your speech betrays you you have an inflection in your accent that tells us you're from the north and jesus's disciples were all from the north and then what happens your speech betrays you and he began to curse and swear now there are those who say see he was a fisherman and fishermen like to swear that's not what he was doing he wasn't using cuss words if you think he was using cuss words he wasn't he was cursing himself and bringing he was swearing it was like this if i am one of his followers may god send me to hell basically it's what he's saying he's cursing himself he's bringing curses on himself he's not using profanity he's bringing curses on himself and swearing i am not this man and i'm swearing that i'm not a follower of him in luke 22 60 through 62 peter said man i don't know what you're saying immediately while he was still speaking the rooster crowed and the lord turned and looked at peter and peter remembered the word of the lord how he had said to him before the rooster crows you'll deny me three times and peter went out and went bitterly jesus has already gone through a beating he's already he's already been hurt as all of this is taking place jesus had already been abused and in the midst of all of this well the apostle peter is there by this fire and he's cursing and bringing curses on himself i don't know the man can you picture that as he looks up and he's saying i don't know the man and he looks up and out of the shadows even if you will they're leading christ and as they're leading jesus out you can see jesus look at the apostle peter and the apostle peter comes to himself for a moment and he looks at him and he looks at what they did to him and he looks at what they did to him how many nights he had been by the campfire with jesus how many nights he had sat next to him even slept next to him he had seen him smile probably heard him laugh he had had jesus look at him with all that love maybe he had said things that made jesus shake his head like i can't believe you you all those memories all those memories the smile and then he looks at him and his face is bruised and it's bloody he's been abused and he's so busy yelling and god's curses come upon me and he looks up and jesus looks at him and he remembers before the rooster crows you will deny me three times and it hits him i just did that exactly what he said i would do i just did that and he went out and he wept the scripture says bitterly some of us have cried all of us have cried all of us have teared up and quite possibly all of us have or one day will have wept bitterly weeping bitterly isn't the same as crying weeping bitterly is convulsing with tears trying to catch your breath because it feels like your insights are going to come out like i have wept bitterly many times over many painful things that we've experienced where you can actually just hold your stomach and and it feels like someone kicked you a horse kicked you something shatters inside something breaks and the tears don't just form they stream you convulse in pain i've laid on carpets before crying my heart out to god for a broken heart when my father died i cried so loudly i actually cried in my sleep i remember awakening to the sound of someone crying in my house and it was me i cried in my sleep weeping with sorrow with the brokenness that i never felt in my life and that's what peter was doing guys peter betrayed the one he loved so much the one he said i'd die for he failed him this heart was broken and he wept but there was one thing he forgot again the lord had said to him simon simon indeed satan has asked for you that he may sift you as wheat but i have prayed for you that your faith should not fail and when you have returned to me strengthen your brethren simon i'm not giving up on you you're gonna fail but i already knew that and so i prayed for you that your your strength would not fail we're gonna see later on the restoration of this mighty man of god but jesus knew what his disciple would do and prayed for him so that when everything was said and done he would return to christ and be a strength to others one of the things i've discovered is god can give us beauty for ashes he didn't intend for peter to do what the apostle did any more than he's ever intended for me to fail in the way i have but i do know that in my own failures when i have disappointed myself that i've been healed by christ and i've become stronger because my determination to not repeat such a thing strengthen my resolve to live for christ he can take the things that were meant for evil and he can turn them around for good and he can take that pain and that failure and it can give you in that wisdom and experience so that you can help other people i went to my professor and i was sharing with him of a disappointment and he said something to me that i'll never forget he said david and this is when i was a young man he said david you're a called man he says you what you think is normal in your life is not normal he says i don't know anybody else who led his mom and dad to christ i don't know anybody else who's led their family to jesus christ you're the only person i know has ever done something like that he said that doesn't normally happen he said you're a called man but if you don't heal from this brokenness that you're feeling right now if you don't heal from this failure you will never be able to help somebody else to heal you must heal and in christ you will heal and that's the truth i had gone through such pain and such depression but i learned to turn those painful things over to the lord and as a result of that he strengthened me and made me into the man i wanted to be all along god breaks you and then he remakes you and when you are following jesus you're not always going to be a hundred percent solid there are going to be failures in your part but he has also prayed for you don't forget that how do i know that he grew 725 he is also able to save to the uttermost those who come to god through him since he always lives to make intercession for them he's praying for you right now did you know that that your god your savior jesus is always living to make intercession for you you're not alone you're not alone in the things you're going through you're not alone in any of the experience of life you are never alone his prayers are with you and you know one of the things about the prayers of christ is they're always answered yes they're always answered yes he never prays out of the will of his father he always has prayed according to the will and so his prayers for you are answered and that's why i can live today as a man who knows that my god forgives to the uttermost we used to have a saying from the gutter most to the uttermost and that's what the lord has done with us isn't it he took us from the lowest and he brought us up to the highest because of what he is and the apostle peter failed but as he fell jesus is going to lift him up and jesus is going to use him in the future and guess what he can do the same with you you may have failed but not completely and not forever because the lord can heal you he can forgive you he can still use you and he will just yield yourself to him and if you need to do that tonight then do it tonight so that he can have his way in you