 volume 2 chapter 7 of the last man this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by Madera the last man by Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley volume 2 chapter 7 I did proceed to win but not with the intention of remaining there I went but to obtain the consent of Idris and then to return and take my station beside my unequalled friend to share his labors and save him if so it must be at the expense of my life yet I dreaded to witness the anguish which my resolve might excite in Idris I had vowed to my own heart never to shadow her countenance even when transient grief and should I prove requient at the hour of greatest need I had begun my journey with anxious haste now I desired to draw it out through the course of days and months I longed to avoid the necessity of action I strove to escape from thought vainly futurity like a dark image in a phantasmagoria came nearer and more near till it clasped the whole earth in its shadow a slight circumstance induced me to alter my usual route and to return home by eagum and bishop gate I alighted at Padita's ancient abode her cottage and sending forward the carriage determined to walk across the park to the castle this spot dedicated to sweetest recollections the deserted house and neglected garden were well adapted to nurse my melancholy in our happiest days Padita had adorned her cottage with every aid art might bring to that which nature had selected to favor in the same spirit of exaggeration she had on the event of a separation from Raymond caused it to be entirely neglected it was now in ruin the deer had claimed the broken palings and were posed among the flowers grass grew on the threshold and the swinging lattice creaking to the wind gave signal of utter desertion the sky was blue above and the air impregnated with fragrance by the rare flowers that grew among the weeds the trees moved overhead awakening nature's favorite melody but the melancholy appearance of the choked pads and weed grown flowerbeds dimmed even this gay summer scene the time when in proud and happy security we assembled at this cottage was gone soon the present hours were joined those past and shadows of future ones rose dark and menacing from the womb of time their cradle and their beer for the first time in my life I envied the sleep of the dead and thought with pleasure of one's bed under the sod where grief and fear have no power I passed through the gap the broken paling I felt while I disdained the choking tears I rushed into the depths of the forest oh death and change rulers of our life where are you that I may grapple with you what was there in our tranquility that excited your envy in our happiness that you should destroy it we were happy loving and beloved the horn of a mouth here contained no blessing unshowered upon us but alas la fortuna deidad Barbara importuna oh cadaver y ayer floor no permanece hamas as I wandered on thus ruminating a number of country people passed me they seemed full of careful thought and a few words of their conversation that reached me induced me to approach it bank further inquiries a party of people flying from London as was frequent in those days had come up the Thames in a boat no one at Windsor would afford them shelter so going a little further up they remained all night in a deserted hut near Bolters lock they pursued their way the following morning leaving one of their company behind them sick of the plague this circumstance once spread abroad none dead approach within half a mile of the infected neighborhood and the deserted wretch was left to fight with disease and death in solitude as he best might I was urged by compassion to hasten to the hut for the purpose of ascertaining his situation and administering to his wants as I advanced I met not so country people talking earnestly of this event distant as they were from the apprehended contagion fear was impressed on every countenance I passed by a group of these terrorists in a lane in the direct road to the hut one of them stopped me and conjecturing that I was ignorant of the circumstance told me not to go on for that an infected personally but a short distance I know it I replied and I'm going to see in what condition the poor fellow is a murmur of surprise and horror ran through the assembly I continued this poor wretch is deserted dying suckles in these unhappy times God knows how soon any or all of us may be in like want I am going to do as I would be done by but you'll never be able to return to the castle lady it is his children in confused speech with the words that struck my ear do you not know my friends I said that the earl himself now Lord protector visits daily not only those probably infected by this disease but the hospitals in pest houses going near and even touching the sick yet he was never in better health you labor under an entire mistake as to the nature of the plague but do not fear I do not ask any of you to accompany me nor to believe me until I return safe and sound from my patient so I left them and hurried on I soon arrived at the hut the door was a jar I entered in one glance assured me that its former inhabitant was no more he lay on a heap of straw cold and stiff while a pernicious effluvia filled the room and various stains and marks served to shoe the virulence of the disorder I had never before beheld one killed by pestilence while every mind was full of dismay at its effects a craving for excitement had led us to pursue defose account and the masterly delineations of the author of Arthur Mervin the pictures drawn in these books were so vivid that we seem to have experienced the results depicted by them but cold were the sensations excited by words burning though they were and describing the death in misery of thousands compared to what I felt in looking on the corpse of this unhappy stranger this indeed was the plague I raised his rigid limbs I mark the distortion of his face and the stony eyes lost to perception as I was thus occupied chill horror congealed my blood making my flesh quiver and my hair to stand on end half insanely I spoke to the dead so the plague killed you I muttered how came this was the coming painful you look as if the enemy had tortured before he murdered you and now I looked up precipitately and escaped from the hut before nature could revoke her laws and inorganic words be breathed in answer from the lips of the departed on returning through the lane I saw at a distance the same assemblage of persons which I had left they hurried away as soon as they saw me my agitated men added to their fear of coming near one who had entered within the verge of contagion at a distance from facts one draws conclusions which appear infallible which yet when put to the test of reality vanish like unreal dreams I had ridiculed the fears of my countrymen when they related to others now that they came home to myself I paused the Rubicon I felt was past and it behoved me well to reflect what I should do on this hitherside of disease and danger according to the vulgar superstition my dress my person the air I breathed bore in it mortal danger to myself and others should I return to the castle to my wife and children with this taint on me not surely if I were infected but I felt certain that I was not a few hours would determine the question I would spend these in the forest in reflection on what was to come and what my future actions were to be in the feeling communicated to me by the sight of one struck by the plague I forgot the events that had excited me so strongly in London knew and more painful prospects by degrees were cleared of the mist which had hitherto veiled them the question was no longer whether I should share Adrian's toils in danger but in what manner I could in Windsor and the neighborhood imitate the prudence and zeal which under his government produced order and plenty in London and how now pestilence had spread more widely I could secure the health of my own family I spread the whole earth out as a map before me I know one spot of its surface could I put my finger and say here is safety in the south the disease virulence and a medical had nearly annihilated the race of man storm and inundation poisonous winds and blights filled the measure of suffering in the north it was worse the lesser population gradually declined and famine and playing kept watch on the survivors who helpless and feeble were ready to fall in easy prey into their hands I contracted my view to England the overgrown metropolis the great heart of mighty Britain was pulseless commerce had ceased all resort for ambition or pleasure was cut off the streets were grass grown the houses empty the few that from necessity remains seemed already branded with the taint of inevitable pestilence in the larger manufacturing towns the same tragedy was acted on a smaller yet more disastrous scale there was no Adrian to super intend and direct while whole flocks of the poor were struck and killed yet we were not all to die no truly though thinned the race of man would continue and the great plague would in after years become matter of history and wonder doubtless this visitation was for extent unexampled more need that we should work hard to dispute its progress air this man have gone out in sport and slain the thousands and tens of thousands but now man had become a creature of price the life of one of them was more worth than the so-called treasures of kings look at his thought in dude countenance his graceful limbs his majestic brow his wondrous mechanism the type and model of this best work of God is not to be cast aside as a broken vessel he shall be preserved in his children and his children's children carry down the name and form of man to latest time above all I must guard those entrusted by nature and fate to my special care and surely if among all my fellow creatures I were to select those who might stand forth examples of the greatness and goodness of man I could choose no other than those allied to me by the most sacred ties some from among the family of man must survive and these should be among the survivors that should be my task to accomplish it my own life for a small sacrifice there then in that castle in Windsor Castle birthplace of Idris in my babes should be the haven and retreat for the wracked bark of human society its forest should be our world its garden afford us food within its walls I would establish the shaken throne of health I was an outcast and a vagabond when Adrian gently threw over me the silver net of love and civilization and linked me inextricably to human charities and human excellence I was one who though an aspirant after good and an ardent lover of wisdom was yet unenrolled in any list of worth when Idris the princely born who was herself the personification of all that was divine in woman she who walked to the earth like a poet's dream as a carved goddess and dude with sense or pictured saint stepping from the canvas she the most worthy chose me and gave me herself a priceless gift during several hours I continued thus to meditate till hunger and fatigue brought me back to the passing hour then marked by long shadows cast from the ascending sun I had wandered toward Bracknell far to the west of Windsor the feeling of perfect health which I enjoyed assured me that I was free from contagion I remembered that Idris had been kept in ignorance of my proceedings she might have heard of my return from London in my visit to Bolter's lock which connected with my continued absence might tend greatly to alarm her I returned to Windsor by the long walk and passing through the town toward the castle I founded in the state of agitation and disturbance it is too late to be ambitious says Sir Thomas Brown we cannot hope to live so long in our names as some have done in their persons one face of Janus holds no proportion to the other upon this text many fanatics arose who prophesied that the end of time was come the spirit of superstition had birth from the wreck of our hopes and antics wild and dangerous were played on the great theater while the remaining particle of futurity dwindled into a point in the eyes of the prognosticators weak spirited women died of fear as they listened to their denunciations men of robust form and seeming strength fell into idiocy and madness racked by the dread of coming eternity a man of this kind was now pouring forth his eloquent despair among the inhabitants of Windsor the scene of the morning in my visit to the dead which had been spread abroad had alarmed the country people so they had become fit instruments to be played upon by a maniac the poor wretch had lost his young wife and lovely infant by the plague he was a mechanic and rendered unable to attend the occupation which supplied his necessities famine was added to his other miseries he left the chamber which contained his wife and child wife and child no more but dead earth upon the earth wild with hunger watching and grief his diseased fancy made him believe himself sent by heaven to preach the end of time to the world he entered the churches and foretold to the congregations their speedy removal to the vaults below he appeared like the forgotten spirit at the time in the theaters and made the spectators go home and die he had been seized and confined he had escaped and wandered from London among the neighboring towns and with frantic gestures and thrilling words he unveiled to each their hidden fears and gave voice to the soundless thought they dared not syllable he stood under the arcade at the town hall of Windsor and from this elevation heranged a trembling crowd here ye inhabitants of the earth he cried here they are all seeing but most pitiless heaven here thou to oh tempest tossed heart which breathes out these words yet thanks beneath their meaning death is among us the earth is beautiful and flower bedecked but she is our grave the clouds of heaven weep for us the pageantry of the stars as but our funeral torchlight gray headed men you hoped for yet a few years in your long known abode but the lease is up you must remove children you will never reach maturity even now the small grave is dug for you mothers clasped them in your arms one death embraces you shuddering he stretched out his hands his eyes cast up seemed bursting from their sockets while he appeared to follow shapes to us invisible in the yielding air there they are he cried the dead they rise and the shrouds and pass in silent procession towards the far land of their doom their bloodless lips move not the shadowy limbs avoid emotion while still they glide onwards we come he exclaimed springing forwards for what should we wait haste my friends apparel yourselves in the court dress a death pestilence will usher you to his absence why this long they the good the wise and the beloved are gone before mothers kiss you last husbands protect us no more lead on the partners of your death come oh come while the dear ones are yet in sight for soon they will pass away and we never never shall join them more from such ravings as these he would suddenly become collected and with unexaggerated but terrific words paint the horrors at the time describe with minute detail the effects of the plague on the human frame until heartbreaking tales of the snapping of dear affinities the gasping horror of despair over the deathbed of the last beloved so that groans and even shrieks burst from the crowd one man in particular stood in front his eyes fixed on the prophet his mouth open his limbs rigid while his face changed to various colors yellow blue and green through intense fear the maniac caught his glance and turned his eye on him one has heard of the gaze of the rattlesnake which allures the trembling victim till he falls within his jaws the maniac became composed his person rose higher authority beamed from his countenance he looked on the peasant who began to tremble while he still gazed his knees knocked together his teeth shattered he at last fell down in convulsions that man has the plague said the maniac calmly a shriek burst from the lips of the poor rich and then sudden motionlessness came over him it was manifest to all that he was dead cries of horror filled the place every one endeavor to affect his escape in a few minutes the marketplace was cleared the corpse lay on the ground and the maniac subdued and exhausted sat beside it leaving his gaunt cheek upon his thin hand soon some people deputed by the magistrates came to remove the body the unfortunate being saw a jailer and each he fled precipitately while i passed onwards to the castle death cruel and relentless had entered these beloved walls an old servant who nursed interest in infancy and who lived with us more on the footing of a revered relative than a domestic had gone a few days before to visit a daughter married and settled in the neighborhood of london on the night of her return she sickened of the plague from the hotty and unbending nature of the counters of winzer interest had few tender filial associations with her this good woman had stood in the place of a mother and her very deficiencies of education and knowledge by rendering her humble and defenseless endeared her to us she was the special favorite of the children i found my poor girl there is no exaggeration in the expression wild with grief and dread she hung over the patient in agony which was not mitigated when her thoughts wandered toward her babes for whom she feared infection my arrival was like the newly discovered lamp of a lighthouse to sailors who are weathering some dangerous point she deposited her appalling doubts in my hands she relied on my judgment and was comforted by my participation in her sorrow soon our poor nurse expired and the anguish of suspense was changed to deep regret which though at first more painful yet yielded with greater readiness to my consolations sleep the sovereign bomb at length steeped her tearful eyes and forgetfulness she slept and quiet prevailed in the castle whose habitants were hushed to repose i was awake and during the long hours of dead night my busy thoughts worked in my brain like ten thousand mill wheels rapid acute untameable all slept all england slept and from my window commanding a wide prospect of the star illumined country i saw the land stretched out in placid rest i was awake alive while the brother of death possessed my race what if the more potent of these paternal deities should obtain dominion over it the silence of midnight to speak truly though apparently a paradox rung in my ears the solitude became intolerable i placed my hand on the beating heart of idris i bent my head to catch the sound of her breath to assure myself that she still existed for a moment i doubted whether i should not wake her so effeminate and horror ran through my frame great god would it one day be thus one day all extinct save myself should i walk the earth alone were these warning voices who's inarticulate in a regular sense forced belief upon me yet i would not call them voices of warning that announced to us only the inevitable as the sun erot is risen sometimes paints its image in the atmosphere so often to the spirits of great events stride on before the events and in today already walks tomorrow end of chapter seven volume two chapter eight of the last man this is a libra box recording all libra box recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit libra box dot o r g recording by madera the last man by mary wolston craft shelly volume two chapter eight after a long interval i'm again impelled by the restless spirit within me to continue my narration but i must alter the mode which i have hitherto adopted the details contained in the foregoing pages apparently trivial yet each slightest one weighing like lead in the depressed scale of human afflictions this tedious dwelling on the sorrows of others while my own were only in apprehension this slowly laying bearer of my soul's wounds this journal of death this long drawn and torturous path leading to the ocean of countless tears awakens me again to keen grief i had used this history as an opiate while it described my beloved friends fresh with life and glowing with hope active assistance on the scene i was soothed there will be a more melancholy pleasure in painting the end of all but the intermediate steps the climbing the wall raised up between what was and is while i still looked back nor saw the concealed desert beyond as a labor past my strength time and experience have placed me on a height from which i can comprehend the past as a whole and in this way i must describe it bringing forward the leading incidents and disposing light in shade so as to form a picture in whose very darkness there will be harmony it would be needless to narrate those disastrous occurrences for which a parallel might be found in any lighter visitation of our gigantic calamity does the reader wish to hear of the pest houses where death is the comforter of the mournful passage of the death card of the insensibility of the worthless and the anguish of the loving heart of harrowing shrieks and silence dire of the variety of disease desertion famine despair and death there are many walks which can feed the appetite craving for these things let them turn to the accounts of bocaccio de faune brown the vast annihilation that has swallowed all things the voiceless solitude of the once busy earth the lonely state of singleness which hams me in has deprived even such details of their stinging reality and mellowing the lowered tints of past anguish with poetic hues i am able to escape from the mosaic of circumstance by perceiving and reflecting back the grouping in combined coloring of the past i had returned from london possessed by the idea with the intimate feeling that it was my first duty to secure as well as i was able the well-being of my family and then to return and take my post beside atrean the events that immediately followed on my arrival at winzer changed this view of things the plague was not in london alone it was everywhere it came on us as rylan had said like a thousand packs of walls howling through the winter night gaunt and fierce when once disease was introduced into the rural districts its effects appeared more horrible more exigent and more difficult to cure than in towns there was a companionship in suffering there and the neighbors keeping constant watch on each other and inspired by the act of benevolence of adrian succor was afforded and the path of destruction smoothed but in the country among the scattered farmhouses in lone cottages in fields and barns tragedies were acted harrowing to the soul unseen unheard unnoticed medical aid was less easily procured food was more difficult to obtain in human beings unwithheld by shame for they were unbeheld of their fellows ventured on deeds of greater wickedness or gave way more readily to their abject fears deeds of heroism also occurred whose very mention swells the heart and brings tears into the eyes such as human nature that beauty and deformity are often closely linked in reading history we are chiefly struck by the generosity and self devotion that follow close on the heels of crime veiling with supernal flowers the state of blood such acts were not wanting to adorn the grim train that waited on the progress of the plague the inhabitants of berkshire and bux had been long aware that the plague was in london in livapool bristol manchester york in short in all the more populous towns of england they were not however the less astonished and dismayed when it appeared among themselves they were impatient and angry in the midst of terror they would do something to throw off the clinging evil and while in action they fancy that a remedy was applied the inhabitants of the smaller towns left their houses pitch tents in the fields wandering separate from each other careless of hunger or the sky's inclimacy while they imagine that they avoided the death-dealing disease the farmers and cottagers on the contrary struck with the fear of solitude and madly desirous of medical assistance flocked into the towns but winter was coming and with winter hope in august the plague had appeared in the country of england and during september it made its ravages towards the end of october it dwindled away and was in some degree replaced by a typhus of hardly less virulence the autumn was warm and rainy the infirm and sickly died off happier they many young people flushed with health and prosperity made pale by wasting malady became the inhabitants of the grave the crop had failed the bad corn in want of foreign wines added vigor to disease before christmas half england was under water the storms of the last winter were renewed but the diminished shipping of this year caused us to feel less the tempests of the sea the flood and storms did more harm to continental europe than to us giving as it were the last blow to the calamities which destroyed it in italy the rivers were unwatched by the diminished peasantry and like wild beasts from their lair when the hunters and dogs over far did tiber arno and poe rush upon and destroy the fertility of the plains whole villages were carried away roman florins and pisa were overflowed in their marble palaces laid mirrored in tranquil streams had their foundations shaken by their winter gifted power in germany and russia the injury was still more momentous but frost would come at last and with it a renewal of our lease of earth frost would blunt the arrows of pestilence and enchain the furious elements and the land would in spring throw off a garment of snow released from her menace of destruction it was not until february that the desired signs of winter appeared for three days the snow fell ice stopped the current of the rivers and the birds flew out from crackling branches of the frost white and trees on the fourth morning all vanished a southwest wind brought up rain the sun came out and marking the usual laws of nature seemed even at this early season to burn with celestial force it was no consolation that with the first winds of march the lanes were filled with violets the fruit trees covered with blossoms that the corn sprung up and the leaves came out forced by the unseasonable heat we feared the balmy air we feared the cloud the sky the flower covered earth and delightful woods for we looked on the fabric of the universe no longer as our dwelling but our tomb and the fragrant land smelled the apprehension of fear like a wide churchyard pisando la tierra dura de contenuo el hombre está ricado paso que da es sobre su sepultura yet not was standing these disadvantages winter was breathing time and we exerted ourselves to make the best of it plague might not revive with the summer but if it did it should find us prepared it is a part of man's nature to adapt itself through habit even to pain and sorrow pestilence had become a part of our future our existence it was to be guarded against like the flooding of rivers the encroachments of ocean or the inclements of the sky after long suffering bitter experience some panacea might be discovered as it was all that receive infection died all however were not infected and it became our part to fix deep the foundations and raise high the barrier between contagion and the same to introduce such order as we conduce to the well-being of the survivors and as would preserve hope and some portion of happiness to those who were spectators of the still renewed tragedy adrian had introduced systematic modes of proceeding in the metropolis which while they were unable to stop the progress of death yet prevented other evils vice and folly from rendering the awful fate of the hour still more tremendous i wish to imitate his example but men are used to move all together if they move at all and i could find no means of leading the inhabitants of scattered towns and villages who forgot my words as soon as they heard them not and veered with every baffling wind that might arise from an apparent change of circumstance i adopted another plan those writers who've imagined a reign of peace and happiness on earth have generally described a rural country where each small township was directed by the elders and wise men this was the key of my design each village however small usually contains a leader one among themselves whom they venerate whose advice they seek in difficulty and whose good opinion they chiefly value i was immediately drawn to make this observation by occurrences that presented themselves to my personal experience in the village of little marlowe an old woman ruled the community she had lived for some years in an alms house and on fine Sundays her threshold was constantly beset by a crowd seeking her advice and listening to her admonitions she had been a soldier's wife and had seen the world infirmity induced by fevers caught in unwholesome quarters had come on her before its time and she seldom moved from her little cot the plague entered the village and while frightened grief deprived the inhabitants of the little wisdom they possessed old martha stepped forward and said before now i've been in a town where there was the plague onion escaped no but i recovered after this marlowe was seated more firmly than ever on the regal seat elevated by reverence and love she entered the cottages of the sick she relieved their wants with her own hand she betrayed no fear and inspired all who saw her with some portion of her own native courage she attended the markets she insisted upon being supplied with food for those who were too poor to purchase it she shewed them how the well-being of each included the prosperity of all she would not permit the gardens to be neglected nor the very flowers in the cottage lattices to droop from want of care hope she said was better than a doctor's prescription and everything that could sustain in a lie in the spirits of more worth than drugs mixtures it was the site of the tomorrow and my conversations with martha that led me to the plan i formed i had before visited the manor houses and gentlemen's seats and often found the inhabitants actuated by the purest benevolence ready to lend their utmost aid for the welfare of their tenants but this was not enough the intimate sympathy generated by similar hopes and fears similar experience in pursuits was wanting here the poor perceived that the rich possessed other means of preservation than those which could be partaken of by themselves seclusion and as far as circumstances permitted freedom from care they could not place reliance on them but turned with tenfold dependence to the sucker and advice of their equals i resolved therefore to go from village to village seeking out the rustic arcana of the place and by systematizing their exertions and enlightening their views increase both their power and their use among their fellow cottages many changes also now occurred in these spontaneous regal elections depositions and abdications were frequent while in the place of the old and prudent the ardent youth would step forward eager for action regardless of danger often too the voice to which all listened was suddenly silenced the helping hand coal the sympathetic eye closed and the villagers feared still more the death that had selected a choice victim shivering in dust the heart that had beat for them reducing to incommunicable annihilation the mind forever occupied with projects for their welfare whoever labors for man must often find in gratitude watered by vice and folly spring from the grain which is so death which had in our younger days walked the earth like a thief that comes in the night now rising from his subterranean vault girt with power with dark banner floating came a conqueror many saw seated above his vice regal throne a supreme providence who directed his shafts and guided his progress and they bowed their heads in resignation or at least in obedience others perceived only a passing casualty they endeavored to exchange terror for heedlessness and plunged into licentiousness to avoid the agonizing throes of worst apprehension thus while the wise the good in the prudent were occupied by the labors of benevolence the truce of winter produced other effects among the young the thoughtless and the vicious during the colder months there was a general rush to london in search of amusement the ties of public opinion were loosened many were rich here to for poor many had lost father and mother the guardians of their morals their mentors and restraints it would have been useless to have opposed these impulses by barriers which would only have driven those actuated by them to more pernicious indulgencies the theaters were open and thronged dance and midnight festival were frequented and many of these decorum was violated and the evils which here the two adhered to an advanced state of civilization were doubled the student left his books the artist's study the occupations of life were gone but the amusements remained enjoyment might be protracted to the verge of the grave all factitious coloring disappeared death rose like night and protected by its murky shadows the blush of modesty the reserve of pride the decorum of prudery were frequently thrown aside as useless fails this was not universal among better natures anguish and dread the fear of eternal separation and the awful wonder produced by unprecedented calamity drew closer the ties of kindred in friendship philosophers opposed their principles as barriers to the inundation of proplagosy or despair and the only ramparts to protect the invaded territory of human life the religious hoping now for their reward clung fast to their creeds as the wraps and planks which over the tempest vexed sea of suffering would bear them in safety to the harbor the unknown continent the loving heart obliged to contract its view bestowed its overflow of affection in triple portion on the few that remained yet even among these the present as an unalienable possession became all of time to which they dared commit the precious freight of their hopes the experience of immemorial time had taught us formally to count our enjoyments by years and extend our prospect of life through a lengthened period of progression and decay the long road threaded a vast labyrinth in the valley of the shadow of death in which it terminated was hid by intervening objects but an earthquake had changed the scene under our very feet the earth yawned deep and precipitous the gulf below opened to receive us while the hours charioted us toward the chasm but it was winter now and months must elapse before we are hurled from our security we became ephemera to whom the interval between the rising and setting sun was as a long drawn year of common time we should never see our children ripen into maturity nor behold the downy cheeks roughened their blithe heart subdued by passion or care but we had them now they lived and we lived what more could we desire was such schooling did my poor interest try to hush the wronging fears and in some measure succeeded it was not as in summertime when each hour might bring the dreaded fate until summer we felt sure and this certainty short lived as it must be yet for a while satisfied her maternal tenderness i know not how to express or communicate the sense of concentrated intense though evanescent transport that imperidized us in the present hour our joys were dearer because we saw their end they were keener because we felt to its fullest extent their value they were pure because their essence was sympathy as a meteor as brighter than a star did the felicity of this winter contain in itself the extracted delights of a long long life how lovely is spring as we looked from Windsor Terrace on the 16 fertile counties spread beneath speckled by happy cottages in wealthier towns all looked as informal years heart cheering and fair the land was ploughed the slender blades of wheat broke through the dark soil the fruit trees were covered with buds the husbandman was abroad in the fields the milkmaid tripped home with well-filled pales the swallows and martins struck the sunny pools with their long pointed wings the new dropped lambs reposed on the young grass the tender growth of leaves lifts its sweet head into the air and feeds a silent space with ever sprouting green man himself seemed to regenerate and feel the frost of winter yield to an elastic and warm renewal of life reason told us that Karen Sauer would grow with the opening year but how to believe that ominous voice breathed up with pesterous vapours from fierce dim caverns while nature laughing and scattering from her green-lap flowers and fruits and sparkling waters invited us to join the gay mask of young life she led upon the scene where was the play here everywhere one voice of horror and dismay exclaimed when in the pleasant days of a sunny may the destroyer of man brooded again over the earth forcing the spirit to leave its organic chrysalis and to enter upon an untried life with one mighty sweep of its potent weapon all caution all care all prudence were leveled low death sat at the tables of the great stretched itself on the cottagers palette seized the dastard who fled quelled the brave man who resisted despondency entered every heart sorrow dimmed every eye sights of woe now became familiar to me and were i to tell all of anguish and pain that i witnessed of the despairing moans of age and the more terrible smiles of infancy in the bosom of horror my reader his limbs quivering and his hair on end would wonder how i did not seized with sudden frenzy dash myself from some precipice and so close my eyes forever on the sad end of the world but the powers of love poetry and creative fancy will dwell even beside the sick of the plague with the squalor and with the dying a feeling of devotion of duty of a high and steady purpose elevated me a strange joy filled my heart in the midst of saddest grief i seem to tread air while the spirit of good shed round me an ambrosial atmosphere which blunted the sting of sympathy and purified the air of sighs if my weird soul flagged in its career i thought of my love at home of the casket that contained my treasures of the kiss of love and the filial caress while my eyes were moistened by purest dew and my heart was at once softened and refreshed by thrilling tenderness maternal affection had not rendered idris selfish at the beginning of our calamity she had with thoughtless enthusiasm devoted herself to the care of the sick and helpless i checked her and she submitted to my rule i told her how the fear of her danger pulsed my exertions how the knowledge of her safety strung my nerves to endurance i shooed her the dangers which her children incurred during her absence and she at length agreed not to go beyond the enclosure of the forest indeed within the walls of the castle we had a colony of the unhappy deserted by their relatives and in themselves helpless sufficient to occupy her time and attention while ceaseless anxiety for my welfare and the health of her children however she strove to curb a concealant absorbed all her thoughts and undermined the vital principal after watching over and providing for their safety her second care was to hide from me her anguish and tears each night i returned to the castle and found their repose and love awaiting me often i waited beside the bed of death to midnight and through the obscurity of rainy cloudy nights rowed many miles sustained by one circumstance only the safety and sheltered repose of those i loved if some scene of tremendous agony shook my frame and fevered my brow i would lay my head on the lap of idris and the tumultuous pulses subsided into a temperate flow her smile could raise me from hopelessness her embrace bathed my soaring heart in calm peace summer advanced and crowned with the sun's potent rays plague shot her unerring shafts over the earth the nations beneath their influence bowed their heads and died the corn that sprung up in plenty lay an autumn rotting on the ground while the melancholy wretch who had gone out to gather bread for his children lay stiff and plague struck in the furrow the green woods waved their bows majestically while the dying was spread beneath their shade answering the solemn melody within harmonious cries the painted birds flitted through the shades the careless deer reposed unhurt upon the phone the oxen and the horses strayed from their unguarded stables and grazed among the wheat or death fell on man alone with summer and mortality grew our fears my poor love and i looked at each other and our babes we will save them idris i said i will save them yes hence we shall recount to them our fears then passed away with their occasion though they only should remain on the earth still they shall live nor shall their cheeks become pale nor the sweet voices languish our eldest in some degree understood the scenes passing around and at times he with serious looks questioned me concerning the reason of so vast a desolation but he was only ten years old and the hilarity of youth soon chased unreasonable care from his bra Evelyn and laughing cherubbe games them infant without idea of pain or sorrow would shaking back his light curls from his eyes make the hauls re-echo with his merriment and in a thousand artless ways attract our attention to his play clara our lovely gentle clara was our stay our solace our delight she made it her task to attend the sick comfort the sorrowing assist the aged and protect the sports and awaken the gaiety of the young she flitted through the rooms like a good spirit dispatched from the celestial kingdom to illumine our dark hour with alien splendor gratitude in praise marked where her footsteps had been yet when she stood in unassuming simplicity before us playing with our children or with girlish acidity performing little kind offices for Idris one wondered in what fair liniment of her pure loveliness in what soft tone of her thrilling voice so much of heroism sagacity and active goodness recited the summer passed tediously for we trusted that winter would at least check the disease that it would vanish altogether was a hope too dear too heartfelt to be expressed one such a thought was heedlessly uttered the heroes with a gush of tears and passionate sobs bore witness how deep their fears were how small their hopes for my own part my exertions for the public good permitted me to observe more closely the most others the virulence and extensive ravages of our sightless enemy a short month had destroyed a village and where in may the first person sickened in june the paths were deformed by unburied corpses the houses tenetless no smoke arising from the chimneys and the housewife's clock marked only the hour when death had been triumphant from such scenes i have sometimes saved a deserted infant sometimes let a young and grieving mother from the lifeless image of a first born or drawn the sturdy laborer from childish weeping over his extinct family july is gone august must pass and by the middle of september we may hope each day was eagerly counted and the inhabitants of towns desires to leap this dangerous interval plunged into dissipation and strove by riot and what they wish to imagine to be pleasure to banish thought in opiate despair none but adrian could obtain the motley population of london which like a troop of unbitted steeds rushed to their pastures had thrown aside all minor fears through the operation of the fear paramount even adrian was obliged in part to yield that he might be able if not to guide at least to set bounds on the license of the times the theaters were kept open every place a public resort was frequented though he endeavoured so to modify them as might best quiet the agitation of the spectators and at the same time prevent a reaction of misery when the excitement was over tragedy deep and dire were the chief favorites comedy brought with it too great a contrast to the inner despair ones such were attempted it was not infrequent for a comedian in the midst of the laughter occasioned by his disproportioned buffoonery to find a word or thought in his part that jarred with his own sense of wretchedness and burst for mimic merriment into psalms and tears while the spectators seized with irresistible sympathy wept and the pantomimic revelry was changed to a real exhibition of tragic passion it was not in my nature to derive consolation from such scenes from theaters whose buffoon laughter and discordant mirth awakened distempered sympathy or were fictitious tears and wailings mocked the heart felt grief within from festival a crowded meeting where hilarity sprung from the worst feelings of our nature or such enthrallment of the better ones as impressed it with garish and false varnish from assemblies of mourners and the guise of revelers once however I witnessed a scene of singular interest at one of the theaters where nature overpowered a heart as an overflowing cataract will tear away the puny manufacturer of a mock cascade which had before been fed by a small portion of its waters I had come to London to see Adrian he was not at the palace and though the attendants did not know whether he had gone they did not expect him till late at night it was between six and seven o'clock a fine summer afternoon and I spent my leisure hours in a ramble through the empty streets of London now turning to avoid an approaching funeral now urged by curiosity to observe the state of a particular spot my wanderings were instinct with pain for silence and desertion characterised every place I visited and the few beings I met were so pale and woe begone so marked with care and depressed by fear that weary of encountering only signs of misery I began to retread my steps toward home I was now in Hallburn and passed by a public house filled with uproarious companions whose songs, laughter and shouts were more sorrowful than the pale looks and silence of the mourner such and one was near hovering round this house the sorry plight of her dress displayed her poverty she was ghastly pale and continued approaching first the window and then the door of the house as a fearful yet longing to enter a sudden burst of song and merriment seemed to sting her to the heart she murmured can he add the heart and then mustering her courage she stepped within the threshold the landlady met her in the passage the poor creature asked is my husband dear can I see George say him cried the woman yeah if you go to him last night he was taken with the plague we sent him to the hospital the unfortunate inquirer staggered against a wall a faint cry escaped her she exclaimed to send him there the landlady meanwhile hurried away but a more compassionate barmaid gave her a detailed account the sum of which was that her husband had been taken ill after a night of riot and sent by his moon companions with all expedition to st. Bartholomew's hospital I had watched this scene for there was a gentleness about the poor woman that interested me she now tartared away from the door walking as well as she could down Hallburn hill but her strength soon failed her she leaned against a wall and her head sunk on her bosom while her pallid cheek became still more white I went up to her and offered my services she hardly looked up you can do me no good she replied I must go to the hospital if I do not die before I get there there was still a few hackney coaches accustomed to stand about the streets more truly from habit than for use I put her in one of these and entered with her that I might secure her entrance into the hospital our way was short and she said little except interruttered ejaculations of reproach that he had left her exclamations on the unkindness of some of his friends and hope that she would find him alive there was a simple natural earnestness about her that interested me in her fate especially when she assured me that her husband was the best of men had been so to want a business during these unhappy times had thrown him into bad company they could not bow to come home she said only to see her children die a man cannot have the patience a mother has with her own flesh and blood we were set down at st. Bartholomew's and entered the wretched precincts of the house of disease the poor creature clung closer to me as she saw with what heartless haste they bore the dead from the wards and took them into a room whose half-open door displayed a number of corpses horrible to behold by one unaccustomed to such scenes we were directed to the ward where her husband had been first taken and still was the nurse said if alive my companion looked eagerly from one bed to the other till at the end of the ward she aspired on a wretched bed a squalid haggard creature writhing under the torture of disease she rushed towards him she embraced him blessing god for his preservation the enthusiasm that inspired her with a strange joy blinded her to the horrors about her but they were intolerably agonizing to me the ward was filled with an effluvia that caused my heart to heave with painful qualms the dead were carried out and the sick brought in with like indifference some were screaming with pain others laughing from the influence of more terrible delirium some were attended by weeping despairing relations others called allowed with thrilling tenderness or reproach on the friends who were deserted and while the nurses went from bed to bed incarnate images of despair neglect and death i gave gold to my loveless companion i recommended her to the care of the attendants i then hastened away while the torment of the imagination busied itself in picturing my own loved ones stretched on such beds attended us the country afforded no such mass of horrors solitary wretches died in the open fields and i have found a survivor in a vacant village contending at once with famine and disease but the assembly of pestilence the banqueting hall of death was spread only in london i rambled on oppressed distracted by painful emotions suddenly i found myself before drew relain theater the play was mcbeth the first actor of the age was there to exert his powers to drug with irreflection the auditors such a medicine i earned for so i entered the theater was tolerably well-filled shakespeare whose popularity was established by the approval of four centuries had not lost his influence even at this dread period but was still utmages the wizard to rule our hearts and govern our imaginations i came in during the interval between the third and fourth act i looked round on the audience the females were mostly of the lower classes but the men were of all ranks come hither to forget a while the protracted scenes of wretchedness which awaited them at their miserable homes the curtain drew up and the stage presented the scene of the witch's cave the wildness and supernatural machinery of mcbeth was a pledge that it could contain little directly connected with our present circumstances great pains had been taken in the scenery to give the semblance of reality to the impossible the extreme darkness of the stage whose only light was received from the fire under the cauldron joined to a kind of mist that floated about it rendered the unearthly shapes of the witches obscure and shadowy it was not three decrepit old hags that bent over their pot throwing in the grim ingredients of the magic charm but forms frightful unreal and fanciful the entrance of hecate and the wild music that followed took us out of this world the caverns shaped the stage assumed the beatling rocks the glare of the fire the misty shades that crossed the scene at times the music in harmony with all witch-like fancies permitted the imagination to revel without fear of contradiction or reproof from reason or the heart the entrance of mcbeth did not destroy the illusion for he was actuated by the same feelings that inspired us and while the work of magic proceeded we sympathized in his wonder and his daring and gave ourselves up with our whole souls to the influence of scenic delusion i felt the beneficial result of such excitement in a renewal of those pleasing flights of fancy to which i had long been a stranger the effect of the scene of incantation communicated a portion of its power to that which followed we forgot that malcolm and mcduff were mere human beings acted upon by such simple passions as warmed our own breasts by slow degrees however we were drawn to the real interest of the sea a shudder like the swift passing of an electric shock ran through the house when rossay explained in answer to stan scotland where it did alas poor country almost afraid to know itself it cannot be called a mother but our grave where nothing but who knows nothing is once seen to smile where sighs and groans and shrieks that rent the air are made not marked where violent sorrows seems a modern ecstasy the dead man's knell is their scarce asked for who and good men's lives expire before the flowers in their caps dying or air they sicken each word struck the sense as our life's passing bell we feel to look at each other but bent our gaze on the stage as if our eyes could fall innocuous on that alone the person who played the part of rossay suddenly became aware of the dangerous ground he tried he was an inferior actor but truth now made him excellent as he went on to announce to mcduff the slaughter of his family he was afraid to speak trembling from apprehension of a burst of grief from the audience not from his fellow mime each word was drawn out with difficulty real anguish painted his features his eyes were now lifted in sudden horror now fixed in dread upon the ground this shoe of terror increased ours we gasped with him each neck was stretched out each face changed with the actor's changes at length while mcduff who attending to his part was unobservant to the high wrought sympathy of the house cried with well acted passion all my pretty ones did you say all oh hell kite all what all my pretty chickens and their damn at one fell swoop a pang of timeless grief wrenched every heart a burst of despair was echoed from every lip i had entered into the universe of feeling i had been absorbed by the terrors of rossay i re echoed the cry of mcduff and then rushed out as from an hell of torture to find calm in the free air in silent street free the air was not or the street silent oh how i longed then for the dear soothing of maternal nature as my wounded heart was still further stung by the roar of heartless merriment from the public house by the sight of the drunkard reeling home having lost the memory of what he would find there an oblivious debauch and by the more appalling salutations of those melancholy beings to whom the name of home was a mockery i ran on at my utmost speed until i found myself i knew not how close to westminster abbey and was attracted by the deep and swelling tone of the organ i entered with soothing awe the lighted chancel and listened to the solemn religious chant which spoke peace and hope to the unhappy the notes freighted with man's dearest prayers re echoed through the demiles and the bleeding of the soul's wounds was staunched by heavenly bomb in spite of the misery i deprecated and could not understand in spite of the cold hearths of wide london and the corp strewn fields of my native land in spite of all the variety of agonizing emotions i had that evening experienced i thought that in reply to a melodious adoration the creator looked down in compassion and promise of relief the awful peel of the heaven-winged music seemed fitting voice wherewith to commune with the supreme calm was produced by its sound and by the sight of many other human creatures offering up prayers and submission with me a sentiment approaching happiness followed the total resignation of one's being to the guardianship of the world's ruler alas with the failing of the solemn strain the elevated spirit sank again to earth suddenly one of the choristers died he was lifted from his desk the vaults below were hastily opened he was consigned with a few muttered prayers to the dark some katham a boat of thousands who had gone before now wide yawning to receive even all who fulfilled the funeral rites in vain i would then have turned from the sea to dark into isle or lofty dome echoing with melodious praise in the open air alone i found relief among nature's beauty's works her god re-assumed his attribute of benevolence and again i could trust that he who built up the mountains planted the forests and poured out the rivers would erect another state for lost humanity where we might awaken again to our affections our happiness and our faith fortunately for me those circumstances were of rare occurrence that obliged me to visit London and my duties were combined to the rural district which our lofty castle overlooked and here labor stood in the place of pastime to occupy such the country people as were sufficiently exempt from sorrow or disease my endeavors were directed towards urging them to their usual attention to their crops and to the acting as if pestilence did not exist the mower's scythe was at times heard yet the joyless haymakers after they had listlessly turned the grass forgot to cart it the shepherd when he had sheared a sheep would let the wool lie to be scattered by the winds deeming it useless to provide clothing for another winter at times however the spirit of life was awakened by these employments the sun the refreshing breeze the sweet smell of the hay the rustling leaves and prattling rivulets brought proposed to the agitated bosom and bestowed a feeling akin to happiness on the apprehensive nor strange to say was the time without its pleasures young couples who had loved long and hopelessly suddenly found every impediment removed and wealth pour in from the death of relatives the very danger drew them closer the immediate peril urged them to seize the immediate opportunity wildly and passionately they sought to know what delights existence afforded before they yielded to death and snatching their pleasures with rough strife thorough the iron gates of life they defied the conquering pestilence to destroy what had been or to erase even from their death bed thoughts the sentiment of happiness which had been theirs one instance of this kind came immediately under our notice where a high-born girl had in early youth given her heart to one of meaner extraction he was a school fellow and friend of her brothers and usually spent a part of the holidays at the mansion of the Duke her father they had played together as children in the confidants of each other's little secrets mutual aids and consolas and difficulty in sorrow love had crept in noiseless, terrorists at first till each felt their life bound up in the other and at the same time knew that they must part their extreme youth and the purity of their attachment made them yield with less resistance to the tyranny of circumstances the father of the fair Juliet separated them but not until the young lover had promised to remain absent only till he had rendered himself worthy of her and she had vowed to preserve her virgin heart his treasure till he returned to claim and possess it plague came threatening to destroy at once the aim of the ambitious and the hopes of love long the duke of l derided the idea that there could be danger while he pursued his plans of cautious seclusion and he so far succeeded that it was not till the second summer that the destroyer at one fell stroke over through his precautions his security and his life poor Juliet saw one by one father mother brothers and sisters sicken and die most of the servants fled on the first appearance of disease those who remained were infected mortally no neighbor of rustic ventured within the verge of contagion by a strange fatality Juliet alone escaped and she to the last waited on her relatives and smoothed the pillow again the moment at length came when the last blow was given to the last of the house the youthful survivor of her race sat alone among the dead there was no living being near to soothe her or withdraw her from this hideous company with the declining heat of a september night a whirlwind of storm thunder and hail rattled around the house and with ghastly harmony sung the dirge of her family she sat upon the ground absorbed in wordless despair when through the busty wind and bickering rain she thought she heard her name called who's could that familiar voice be not one of her relations for they laid glaring on her with stony eyes again her name was syllables and she shuddered as she asked herself am i becoming mad or am i dying that i hear the voices of the departed a second thought passed swift as an arrow into her brain she rushed to the window and a flash of lightning shone to her the expected vision her lover in the shrubbery beneath joy lent her strength to descend the stairs to open the door and then she fainted in his supporting arms a thousand times she reproached herself as with a crime that she should revive to happiness with him the natural clinging of the human mind to life and joy was in its full energy in her young heart she gave herself impetuously up to the enchantment they were married and in their radiant features i saw incarnate for the last time the spirit of love of rapturous sympathy which once had been the life of the world i envied them but felt how impossible it was to imbibe the same feeling now that years had multiplied my ties in the world above all the anxious mother my own beloved and drooping itchers claimed my earnest care i could not reproach the anxiety that never for a moment slept in her heart but i exerted myself to distract her attention from too keen an observation of the truth of things or the near and nearer approaches of disease misery and death of the wild look of our attendance as intelligence of another and yet another death reached us for to the last something new occurred that seemed to transcend in horror all that had gone before wretched beings crawled to die under our suckering roof the inhabitants of the castle decreased daily while the survivors huddled together in fear and as in a famine struck out the sport of the wild interminable waves each looked in the other's face to guess on whom the death lot would next fall all this i endeavored to veil so that it might least impress my interest yet as i have said my courage survived even despair i might be vanquished but i would not yield one day it was the ninth of september seemed devoted to every disaster to every harrowing incident early in the day i heard of the arrival of the aged grandmother of one of our servants at the castle this old woman had reached her hundredth year her skin was shriveled her form was bent and lost an extreme decrepitude but as still from year to year she continued in existence outliving many younger and stronger she began to feel as if she were to live forever the plague came and the inhabitants of her village died clinging with the dastard feeling of the aged to the remnant of her spent life she had on hearing that the pestilence had come into her neighborhood barred her door and closed her casement refusing to communicate with any she would wander out at night to get food and returned home pleased that she had met no one that she was in no danger from the plague as the earth became more desolate her difficulty in acquiring sustenance increased at first her son who lived near had humid her by placing articles of food in her way at last he died but even though threatened by famine her fear of the plague was paramount and her greatest care was to avoid her fellow creatures she grew weaker each day and each day she had further to go the night before she had reached dachshund and prowling about had found a baker's shop open and deserted laden with spoils she hastened to return and lost her way the night was windless hot and cloudy her load became too heavy for her and one by one she threw away her loaves still endeavouring to get along though her hobbling fell into lameness and her weakness at last into inability to move she lay down among the tall corn and fell asleep deep in midnight she was awakened by a rustling near her she would have started up but her stiff joints refused to obey her will a low moan close to her ear followed and the rustling increased she heard a smothered voice breathe out water water several times and then again a sigh he from the heart of the sufferer the old woman shuddered she contrived at length to sit upright but her teeth shattered and her knees knocked together close very closely a half-naked figure just discernible in the gloom and the cry for water and the stifled moan were again uttered her motions at length attracted the attention of her unknown companion her hand was seized with convulsive violence that made the grasp feel like iron the fingers like the keen teeth of a trap at last you are come were the words given forth but this exertion was the last effort of the dying the joints relaxed the figure fell prostrate one low moan the last marked the moment of death morning broke and the old woman saw the corpse marked with the fatal disease close to her her wrist was livid with the hold loosened by death she felt struck by the plague her aged frame was unable to bear her away with sufficient speed and now believing herself infected she no longer dreaded the association of others but as swiftly as she might came to her granddaughter at Windsor castle there to lament and die the sight was horrible still she clung to life and lamented her mishance with cries and hideous groans while the swift advance of the disease shewed what proved to be the fact that she could not survive many hours while I was directing that the necessary care should be taken of her Clara came in she was trembling in pale and when I anxiously asked her the cause of her agitation she threw herself into my arms weeping and exclaiming uncle dearest uncle do not hate me forever I must tell you for you must know that Evelyn Paula to Evelyn her voice was choked by sobs the fear so mighty a calamity as the loss of our adored infant made the current of my blood paws with chilly horror but the remembrance of the mother restored my presence of mind I sought the little bit of my darling he was oppressed by fever but I trusted I fondly and fearfully trusted that there were no symptoms of the plague he was not three years old and his illness appeared only one of those attacks incident infancy I watched him long this heavy half-closed lids his burning cheeks and restless twining of his small fingers the fever was violent the torpor complete enough without the greater fear of pestilence to awaken alarm Idris must not see him in the state Clara, though only twelve years old, was rendered through extreme sensibility so prudent and careful that I felt secure in entrusting the charge of him to her and it was my task to prevent Idris from observing their absence I administered the fitting remedies and left my sweet niece to watch beside him and bring me noticed of any change she should observe I then went to Idris contriving in my way plausible excuses for remaining all day in the castle and endeavouring to disperse the traces of care from my brow fortunately she was not alone I found Marival the astronomer with her he was far too long-sighted in his view of humanity to heed the casualties of the day and lived in the midst of contagion unconscious of its existence this poor man learned as Laplacia guileless and unforeseeing as a child had often been on the point of starvation he his pale wife a numerous offspring while he neither felt hunger nor observed distress his astronomical theories absorbed him calculations were scrawled with coal on the bare walls of his garret a hard-earned guinea or an article of dress was exchanged for a book without remorse he neither heard his children cry nor observed his companions emaciated form and the excess of calamity was merely to him as the occurrence of a cloudy night when he would have given his right hand to observe a celestial phenomenon his wife was one of those wondrous beings to be found only among women with affections not to be diminished by misfortune her mind was divided between boundless admiration for her husband and tender anxiety for her children she waited on him worked for them and never complained though care rendered her life one long drawn melancholy dream he had introduced himself to adrian by a request he made to observe some planetary emotions from his glass his poverty was easily detected and relieved he often thanked us for the books we lent him and for the use of our instruments but never spoke of his altered abode or change of circumstances his wife assured us that he had not observed any difference except in the absence of the children from his study into her infinite surprise he complained of this unaccustomed quiet he came now to announce to us the completion of his essay on the parasyclical motions of the earth's axis and the procession of the equinoctial points if an old roman of the period of the republic had returned to life and hawked of the impending election of some law crowned council or of the last battle with mithridates his ideas would not have been more alien to the times than the conversation of marival man no longer with an appetite for sympathy clothed his thoughts and visible signs nor were there any readers left while each one having thrown away his sword with opposing shield alone awaited the plague marival talked of the state of mankind six thousand years hence he might with equal interest to us have added a commentary to describe the unknown and unimaginable lineaments of the creatures who would then occupy the vacated dwelling of mankind we had not the heart to deceive the poor old man and at the moment i came in he was reading parts of his book to itris asking what answer could be given to this or that position itris could not refrain from a smile as she listened she had already gathered from him that his family was alive and in health though not apt to forget the precipice of time on what she stood yet i could perceive that she was amused for a moment by the contrast between the contracted view we had so long taken of human life and the seven league strides with which marival pays to come in eternity i was glad to see her smile because it assured me of her total ignorance of her infant's danger but i shuddered to think of the revulsion that would be occasioned by a discovery at the truth while marival was talking clara softly opened a door behind itris and beckoned me to come with a gesture and look of grief a mirror betrayed the sign to itris she started up to suspect evil to perceive that alfred being with us the danger must regard her youngest darling to fly across the long chambers into his apartment was the work but up a moment there she beheld her eveline lying fever stricken emotions i followed her and strove to inspire more hope than i could myself entertain but she shook her head mournfully anguish deprived her of presence of mind she gave up to me and clara the physicians and nurses parts she sat by the bed holding one little burning hand and with glazed eyes fixed on her babe past the long day in one unvaried agony it was not the plague that visited our little boy so roughly but she could not listen to my assurances apprehension deprived her of judgment and reflection every slight convulsion of her child's features shook her frame if he moved she dreaded the instant crisis if he remained still she saw death in his torpor and the cloud on her brow darkened the poor little thing's fever increased towards night the sensation is most dreary to use no stronger term with which one looks forward to passing the long hours of night beside a sick bed especially if the patient be an infant who cannot explain its pain and whose flickering life resembles the wasting flame of the watchlight whose narrow fire is shaken by the wind and on whose edge devouring darkness hovers with eagerness one turns toward the east with angry impatience one marks the uncheckered darkness the crowing of a cock that sound of glee during daytime comes wailing and untunable the creaking of rafters and slight stir of invisible insect is heard and felt as the signal and type of desolation Clara overcome by weariness had seated herself at the foot of her cousin's bed and in spite of her efforts slumber weighed down her lids twice her thrice she shook it off but at length she was conquered and slept Idris sat at the bedside holding Evelyn's hand we were afraid to speak to each other I watched the stars I hung over my child I felt his little pulse I drew near the mother again I receded at the turn of morning a gentle sigh from the patient attracted me the burning spot on his cheek faded his pulse beat softly and regularly torpor yielded to sleep for a long time I dared not hope but when his unobstructed breathing in the moisture that suffused his forehead were tokens no longer to be mistaken of the departure of mortal malady I ventured to whisper the news of the change to Idris and at length succeeded in persuading her that I spoke true but neither this assurance nor the speedy compolessence of our child could restore her even to the portion of peace she before enjoyed her fear had been too deep to absorbing too entire to be changed to security she felt as if during her past calm she had dreamed but was now awake she was as one in some lone watchtower on the deep awakened from soothing visions of the home he loves trembling to hear the wrathful billows roar as one who has been cradled by a storm and awakes to find the vessel sinking before she had been visited by pangs of fear now she never enjoyed an interval of hope no smile of the heart ever irradiated her fair countenance sometimes she forced one and then gushing tears would flow in the sea of grief close around these wrecks of past happiness still while i was near her she could not be an utter despair she fully confided herself to me she did not seem to fear my death or revert to its possibility to my guardianship she consigned the full freight of her anxieties reposing on my love as a wind nipped fawn by the side of a dough as a wounded nestling under its mother's wing as a tiny shattered boat quivering still beneath some protecting willow tree while i not proudly as in days of joy yet tenderly and with glad consciousness of the comfort i afforded drew my trembling girl close to my heart and tried to ward every painful thought her rough circumstance from her sensitive nature one other incident occurred at the end of the summer the Countess of Windsor ex-queen of England returned from Germany she had at the beginning of the season quitted the vacant city of Vienna and unable to tame her hotty mind to anything like submission she had delayed at Hamburg and when at last she came to London many weeks elapsed before she gave Adrian notice of her arrival in spite of her coldness in long absence he welcomed her with sensibility displaying such affection as sought to heal the wounds of pride and sorrow and was repulsed only by her total apparent want of sympathy Idris heard of her mother's return with pleasure her own maternal feelings were so ardent that she imagined her parent must now in this waste world have lost pride in harshness and would receive with delight her filial attentions the first check to her duteous demonstrations was a formal intimation from the fallen majesty of England that i was in no manner to be intruded upon her she consented she said to forgive her daughter and acknowledge her grandchildren larger concessions must not be expected to me this proceeding appeared if so light a term may be permitted extremely whimsical now that the race of man had lost in fact all distinction of rank this pride was doubly fortuitous now that we felt a kindred fraternal nature with all who bore the stamp of humanity this angry reminiscence of times for ever gone was worse than foolish Idris was too much taken up by her own dreadful fears to be angry hardly grieved for she judged that insensibility must be the source of this continued ranker this was not altogether the fact but predominant self will assume the arms and mask of callous feeling and the haughty lady disdain to exhibit any token of the struggle she endured while the slave of pride she fancied that she sacrificed her happiness to a mutable principle false was all this false all but the affections of our nature and the links of sympathy with pleasure or pain there was but one good and one evil in the world life and death the pump of rank the assumption of power the possessions of wealth vanished like morning mist one living beggar had become of more worth than a national peerage of dead lords alas the day then of dead heroes patriots or men of genius there was much of degradation in this for even vice and virtue had lost their attributes life life the continuation of our animal mechanism was the alpha and omega of the desires the prayers the prostrate ambition of human race end of chapter eight