 Hi, everyone. Welcome again to another Nars... As you can see, I am hiking through this forest. I'm sweating a little bit. Today I want to bring you this message of what is the narcissist's worst nightmare. Because what they want when they leave you and they discard or when you finally get fed up and you leave, they want you to be the narcissist's character. They want you to be longing and yearning for them and feeling like you're missing something. You're deficient in something as though you're still depended on them as though you want them to come back. Because that is one of the greatest fears. They see it as rejection and abandonment and also exposure at times, is that if you can move on or if they leave you and you don't want anything from them, you don't. Which is why when they first target you, it's all about trying to figure out what it is you actually want or need. And giving that to you a little bit at a time or withholding it from you. It's all manipulation and deception. Future faking and loss is that you manage to move on. You get it together. You get back on your feet. You find yourself again. And then you move on. Be with all of your qualities and abilities, your achievements. All of these things that you've worked so hard for. Yes, that is their worst nightmare. Which is why when you were with them, they were constantly over your shoulder. They were constantly suffocating you. Because with that pressure and intimidation, I elates who you actually were and are. Yes, they were hoping that it would drive that away because they understand that their overwhelming power and influence over people, it changes them. Sometimes even at a core level, it destroys everything that you are and then you become a completely different person. Because when they're constantly pressuring you and intimidating you and they're manipulating your emotions, it causes you to act out of character. And the more that this happens over a long period of time, it turns you into a completely different person. And then they stand back and they point their finger at you and they say, look at what you've become. Or look at what you hid from them the entire time. It's very easy for them to blame you and gaslight you, triangulate you and starts your campaigns against you to make you look bad. Because the sad truth is, yes, a lot of people, they don't look as much as they look at the effect. So they don't look deep enough to see that you were surrounded by this narcissist the entire time. This person who had full control over your thoughts, your feelings, your actions, behaviors, they dictated everything you did on a day-to-day basis. So you weren't even being yourself during that time. Then you would be punished until you finally moulded yourself into what they wanted. And they do hope that that will continue long after they've discarded you or long after you've decided to move on. They still want to be a factor and influence in your life to have control over you because that gives them supply. It makes them feel powerful and important. You and it's like you are their work, their project, their experiment. And they really see it as in such a state where they can't move on. They can't put the pieces of their life back together. They can't even think for themselves. They need someone else to guide and direct them. Yes, the narcissist can immediately sense it and they will come back to show you the way, to show you where they want you to be. Because everything with them, it's all manipulation. It's all about moulding you into what they want that, but especially what they don't want. The first thing they want you to be is yourself. You can be anyone else, just not yourself. Because they see that as a very strong force of power that has the ability to influence and direct people's behaviour in the course of events. So I don't want you to break it down to stop you from having that. Because yes, they recognise that you are far greater than them. Which is why they're always over your shoulder, they're always suffocating you because they already know you're going to surpass them. You're going to overpower them. And you're going to make them look like a fool. And naturally, you would have to preside over them in the authoritative role. You would have to tell them what to do. And of course, they do as self-serving. It's all about themselves. They're not interested in anything where it's recall or where it might benefit you or anyone else, it's all about themselves. And that's the whole point. That's why they have to break your identity. That's why they need to have all of the power that they can direct things in the way that they want to. Whatever serves them, whatever makes them false. And sometimes they can manipulate you and make you think that they're trying to help you as though something's good for you. But even then, it's still all about them. It's all about the feeling that they're going to get from it. One thing they cannot deal with is to no longer be a factor in your life. To no longer have that influence and control. And they will go out of their way and destroy entire families, social circles, entire communities. They will do whatever it takes just to control you. Because they look at all of these people as just pawns on a chessboard. And they see you as the king. So they're trying to take all of the pieces, they're trying to knock off anyone who validates or supports you, everyone who defends or protects you. And they move in their minions, they're flying monkeys, they're enablers. And then they've got you, it's checkmate. You can't go anywhere. You can't be you, you can't do what you want to do. But the whole thing is just to paint you as the problem. As though you're not doing things the right way, you're not conforming. And they are, even though it's just the wearing a mask, they're not really about that for real. So it's all just to paint you as the problem. Which is why the last thing they want to see and their worst nightmare is that you do move on and you find someone else. You get married, you start a family. You live well, you live a good life. You take care of your husband or wife, your children. You do everything the right way. Because if you go and do that, it's going to make them look like fools. They're going to look crazy. Because the entire time they painted this picture of you, they made you out to be a certain way as though something was wrong with you. You weren't good enough or you weren't doing things the right way. So that's how they defined you. How they labeled you. And you may not have realised it, but the whole point of that, of putting you in this box, that's to defend and protect their false self and the illusion. That's just to make them look good. To make them look like they're superior to you and they need to maintain this authority to roll over you. That's the whole purpose of it. And when you step outside of that box, true entity, your values and beliefs, when you do that, it's like you're just tearing up everything that they're buying to you. These labels and definitions of who you are and who you are supposed to be, which is why they had to control you in the beginning. So, yeah, it seemed like they want you to be better, you to perform well. Yeah, Tiaz, that no, that was never what they wanted from you. They just wanted to break you down. And you will see that because as soon as you do, as soon as you get back on your feet, they come back with a hoover. And then it's all about breaking you down again and labeling you as the bad person, turning every, everything they do is designed to break you. They don't want you to be better, to be greater, to become the best version of yourself and live your best life. Yes, they act like there's something wrong with you, you're not good enough. That's just the narrative, the illusion to cover up for their insecurities and deficiencies of how they couldn't make anything out of their lives. And they just cover it with the false character and the illusion. If they really wanted you to be better or greater, even if you're dealing with a narcissist, you would have seen a very different side of them. They would have treated you as a golden child. But no, instead, what did they do? They scapegoated you? Or you were the black sheep? Because in actuality, you were too good. They could see that you were going to surpass them. You were going to take their spotlight away from them. You were going to make them look bad. And that's just the last thing they want you to do. Remember, we're talking about narcissists here. They have these delusions of grandeur. They have to feel as though they're superior to everyone. And yes, they can present the false image of seeing people as their equals. But take a good look at it because who are their friends? Who are their families that they keep around them? They only keep people around them who they believe can benefit them in some way. People who help to maintain their false image rather than people they actually care about for real. These connections are always based on something superficial because it isn't even real. Which is why, yes, their image is extremely important to them. And the last one, surpassing them or trying to surpass them, trying to be better instead of just staying in your place. They do not want to see that. Especially when you've questioned and confronted them. If you threaten to expose them, even just by you being you, that can pose as a threat to their false image. And it just makes them want to keep you down and control you to stop you from getting ahead. Once you threat their insecurities of rejecting the man or their fear of exposure, they're just going to harass you and badger you down after that. They're going to be in your ear every day with these where they're constantly putting you down, devaluing you. They're making you feel like you're nothing. They're telling you you're never going to achieve anything. You're never going to be anything at all and wash you. And they're doing that because they don't want you to surpass them because they know that if you do that, right on them, they think of it like other people are seeing it. And they're going to see it like if you can move on on your own and do far better than you did with them, then it just reveals who the problem was. Because if you were so bad, you were so wrong, how can you achieve more on your own? How can you exist in a funnel environment without any drama, without any problems? How could that be possible if what they said about you was true? Because the whole thing about what they apply and assign to the victim or the target is that you are the one who is dysfunctional. You are the one who can't act appropriately or right. You are the one who is the nuisance, the problem. Even though it's crazy that it is, that's what they become to you to try to control you while they're still pointing at the finger at you and calling you crazy. I mean, that's really just how crazy these types of people are. I mean, I remember I saw this movie about a narcissistic mother and her daughter. And, yeah, the movie was just she made her daughter believe that she was sick. She had some kind of illness. And this all started when her daughter became a teenager and she began to outshine her narcissistic mother. She was more beautiful. At least that's what they portrayed. And, yeah, the narcissistic mother was very insecure, so she deliberately made her teenage daughter sick where she was in bed all day, every day. She could never leave her because she thought that she was sick on her own and was helping her to take care of her. And then one day, the girl's sister, she discovered the poison, the things that the mother was giving to the daughter, which she disguised as medicine. That was actually the very thing that was keeping her sick and stuck in bed every day to when she was isolated. She had no friends, she never had a boyfriend, nothing. And in the end, quite a memorable scene, and this is actually how it goes in real life with narcissistic people. When the girl's sister found the poison and she confronted the mother she exposed to in a cystic injury, the mother got extremely angry and she began to rage. She strangled one of the daughters. I can't remember which one. And yeah, she was strangling her. She had her hands around her neck and she was killing her. And at the same time, she was screaming, why are you hurting me? Why are you hurting me? And this is a perfect example. It's a brilliant movie. I can't remember the name of it, but I would love to watch it again. If anyone has seen it, please let me know. I can watch it again. But yes, this is exactly how it plays out in real life. And it doesn't mean they have to physically put their hands on you and strangle you. Although that is what some of you may have experienced already with narcissists, but even just on a psychological level and how they manipulate you emotionally, they abuse you, they punish you, because they have a fear of abandonment and rejection. They have a fear of exposure. And yeah, they don't want you to outshine them. They don't want you to surpass them, especially if you are the child of a narcissist. That is the last they want to see. So it's all about keeping you down, making you believe that thing is wrong with you. Even if they're not making you physically sick, although a lot of the things they do, that is often what will come out of it. Yeah, it's all about keeping you down. And if they had it their way, yes, they would prefer to keep it behind closed doors. Of course, that's much easier for them to where no one else has to be informed about it, just like in that movie. But typically what happens is, if the target, the victim is strong and they're not so susceptible to the gaslighting, they're still trying to do something. They're trying to go out, get a job, have friends, relationships, all of these things. Then the narcissist may continue devaluing you. But if that isn't enough, then they will devalue other people to you to make you feel like what you're doing is wrong. And if that doesn't work, then as we know, yes, they will start smear campaigns and enforce their flying monkeys. And they will control the environment so that the environment turns against you. So that it makes it almost impossible for you to move on and just live a normal life. Because of course, yes, victims, targets of narcissists, that's all they really want is just to live. Yes, narcissists will make it seem that there's something wrong with you. And the basis of it is usually to do with you being no good. There's something wrong with you so you shouldn't go out and engage with other people. You should keep it off. And if that doesn't work, then there's something wrong with the people you're engaged with. You need to stay away from them. They're bad, they're dangerous. Something's not right with them. And if that doesn't work, then yes, it goes to the smear campaigns. And they may get you caught up in all kinds of things. They may try and get you in trouble with the... They may try and lock it up. These are all tactics. It's all to make you think that something is wrong with you. And if that doesn't work and you're still confident in yourself and you're still trying, then they'll just make everyone else think that something's wrong with you. Where you're still isolated. And why? When it's their brains, it's all in there. It's this... They're disordered. And yes, many of them like their disorders, but they don't want people to see as disordered. Only the supply, the main supply gets to see that. Now sees a different side of them. Unless they're really angered or irritated about them, then it may go as well. But then they'll quickly control it to save fake image. But yeah, that's what it's all about. It's about you separating from being an extension of the narcissist and finding yourself, what you believe in, what you value, what you stand for. And just surpassing them. Succeeding where they had failed. And I know what you may be thinking. Maybe the narcissist you were dealing with. Maybe things were going quite well for them. They didn't have them. But that's from your view, from your perspective. Because you don't see what's really going on with them inside their minds. They can seem even at times that they are self-loathing, but it's projected outwards on to other people. And they'll tell you how the world is so unfair to them. They never get the outcome or result that they want. And yeah, as though it's unfair, as though they don't deserve to go through the things they're going through, we already know that at a time, they bring it on themselves. But yeah, this is just how it goes with narcissists. They're very insecure, and they have low self-esteem. They can't go with it. So it's all about controlling the outside world. Controlling other people. Because I can tell you that a person who is secure with themselves, they feel no need to control anyone. They feel no need to do that at all. Only people who are insecure do that. People who live in a state of fear, shame or desire. They feel like they're missing something. And then it's all about controlling you so that you don't get it. Because they never heal traumas. And yeah, being an obstruction, a hindrance to you, influencing and controlling you, doing all of these things, manipulating your emotions. All of these things you do, it acts as a band-aid for them. A form of self-medication. It makes them feel better and it emanates their mind so much that they just can't see. They can't even see a situation, which actually could have turned out very good for them. And yeah, if they let you move on, they let you do what you wanted to do, you could have provided something more to them. You would have had more compassion for them. And they could have lived vicariously for your success. They could have taken credit for a lot of those things. But a lot of times, it's like they can't see the forest for the trees. They're just so self-absorbed in them, how they see themselves, how other people see them. But yes, it's all about manipulating and controlling whatever's outside of them, whatever they envy, whatever they're jealous of. It's all about controlling that. So yes, it's very sad, but this is what they do. And the saddest thing is the loss of potential in the victim. I mean, just to go back to that movie, the narcissistic mother's daughter, she lost many years of her life, stuck at home in bed thinking that she was sick. When her mother did it to her deliberately to stop her from going now, going to school, having friends, having relationships. And typically, if you have any insight into the narcissist's past, you will find that they missed out on a lot of things in their life too. And that's typically what it is. Traumatize them. And sometimes they can live vicariously through their victim. And that can propel you to success in some area. But that's not going to happen once you trigger the abandonment wounds, once you threaten to expose them. And also at times when they feel like you're going to surpass them and make them look bad. And if they can't take credit for your success, all of these types of things are going to impact how it turns out in the getting. I mean, with those types of things, those types of grandiose narcissist, the overt ones, the ones who... Most people would not say they're so nice or friendly. They would say, yes, they are just a typical jerk, but people still accept them. Those types of overt grandiose narcissist, with their relationship partners, their children, yes, they will want you to shine, even at their expense. And they will push you in that direction, especially a narcissistic and child. And they will invest a lot of their time and effort into you, a lot of their money. There won't be any emotional support at all. But it would all be about you surpassing and succeeding where they had failed, as though you have to achieve everything that they couldn't for whatever reason. But that does not happen with the covert narcissist. It doesn't work out that way at all with them. It's all about keeping you down and holding you back because as they've probably already told you so many times, life was unfair to them. And it's all about them. It's just they don't look at other people and what they're going through. They can't even see that a lot of people have it far worse off than they do because it's just all about themselves and how can they manipulate their victims and the environment to suit their needs. And it's all about just sustaining this false sense of self, this image of how people see them, of how, just like in the movie, they were just trying to help you. They were just trying to make things better for you. They did everything they could. They tried their best. But for some reason, you turned against them. You tried to make them look bad. You tried to damage their reputation. And now they've got to keep tabs on you. They've got to watch you. They've got to hold you back because you're dangerous. And yes, the reality is that you are. You do become extremely dangerous to their false character, to the illusion. That's what you become extremely dangerous and a threat to. But not to anything real. Not to anything grounded in reality because all you are trying to do is live a fulfilling life and meet not only their needs but the needs of the other people around you. And there's nothing wrong with that at all. But it was wrong for them because then they couldn't get what they wanted. A little view here. Yeah, it's very sad how these things turn out. It's just the loss of potential. Like what things could have been. And it makes me sad when I make these videos. Of course I think about this a lot. It's just all of you who are watching this now if you didn't have these narcissists in your life who knows what you could have achieved. You could have provided certain services to the world. You could have changed so many people's lives. You could have made things better for everyone. And I think narcissists know that. Of course they must be aware of it. But they don't really care because what's that doing for them? All they care about is themselves and they look at it like if you go off and you do that it's just gonna make me look bad. You're just gonna surpass me, you're gonna outshine me. Because remember, narcissists are very insecure. That's why they think that way. I know a lot of you are watching this. You may feel very secure within yourself. You practice self-love. And you just can't imagine it. You just don't understand how they can think the way that they think. Almost fell down. Yeah, you just can't understand. It's like what is it inside of you that compels you to wanna hold me back to control me and stop me from getting ahead and do in something meaningful with my life. And of course the reason is because it's like the crabs in the bucket mentality. They don't want you to leave them behind because of course that's what's gonna happen when you realize your potential, your qualities and abilities, everything great about you. And you start getting that attention, that validation from other people outside of them. All of these things are just gonna tell you that you never needed the narcissist all along. And not only that, but in fact they were a hindrance in your life. That's all that's going to do. And of course that's the last thing the narcissist wants because typically their entire purpose is just based on grooming the supply and training them to be what they need them to be, to validate the false self, the illusion and to make them feel powerful, to make them think that they have a purpose, they're able to affect someone. And that's just what you're assigned to do when you're around narcissists. They have a void within and it's all about filling that void, feeling that sense of safety, security and stability. It's just that feeling that they get from influencing and controlling you rather than it is about manifesting anything real. About anything real actually coming into fruition, it's all about that feeling. And of course that is why you will find narcissists. They tend to stay the same their entire lives. They never actually take action with anything. A lot of them are very lazy. I mean some of them may achieve some level of success but after that point it's just they just hold that success over everyone's heads and that's all there is to it. They have no interest, no desire in achieving anything more than becoming the greatest versions of themselves. It's never really about that, it's all just about the image and what other people see than it is to actually go within and be something for real. Just jumping down here, coming to the end of this hiking path and back to the car. But yeah, if anyone knows that movie let me know the title in the comments because I'd love to watch that again. It's definitely something that resonates with me and yeah, I hate it when I see things like that when I see people who have been held back in life and prevented from being what they could have been. It's not nice at all when you see people isolated and they're not allowed to have anything in their lives. That is a horrible thing to see from me and I would say that's probably the reason why I began this channel in the first place because I know what it's like, I know what it's like to be alone where you spend every day on your own you're not allowed to talk to anyone and if any people come around the narcissist they will sense that energy they will feel as though they're not supposed to be around you and yeah, you spend most of your life alone you don't go after your goals and dreams you don't try to achieve anything you don't try to do what you really want to do because you feel like you're held back and yeah, that's really why I created this channel because I wanted to be a message of voice to you to show you that yes, it is possible you can become the best version of yourself you can go out and achieve your dreams and as you can see, yes, that's exactly what I'm doing right now traveling the world I'm living my best life and yeah, I'm just having a great time enjoying myself and if I can do it you can do it too despite the things that you have gone through the things that you have experienced you too, yes, you have the potential to get back on your feet and continue with your life yes, you do have the potential to do that and yes, I stand here as a model as someone who represents that there is life after abuse because of course, as we know narcissists don't want you to think like that once they witness your trauma at that point they just objectify you they see you as an extension of them they think it's all over for you after that and the reason why is because that's how they felt with their own trauma with the trauma they experienced in their childhood they abandoned their true self and created a false character and this illusion so they assume and they expect it to be all over for you if you've gone through some traumatic experiences in your life they don't think that you should just get to move on and be happy they don't think that you should get to do that at all and yes, that's just what you have to understand with these narcissists because they look at it like I could never be myself I could never be the person who I wanted to be I felt like I was unlovable I wasn't good enough so in my childhood I had to create a false character as a result of the trauma and this is how they think is they look at you and to see that despite all of the abuse all of the trauma that you went through you can still be your authentic self and you still have the exact same values, beliefs and desires as you had at the very beginning you're still trying to achieve that and they give up on it a long time ago they accept it, okay, I'm never going to experience love intimacy or connection, I'm never going to have that so I'll just create this false character and manipulate people but you never did that you held on to it your entire life and I know you did because you're watching my video right now you wouldn't be watching this if you didn't still believe narcissists there's just no incentive for them to act right they believe that there's more incentive for them to be evil than to be good but for us, those of us who are here right now we never gave up on that the very thing that they gave up on because they believed they weren't good enough to do that we held on to it this entire time and of course that is the reason why everything they do is just designed to break you to make you give up on it too because it doesn't look so good for them they gave up they stopped acting right because they believed that wasn't good enough that wouldn't achieve a worthwhile result for them and you're going on, you're still doing right it just makes them look like idiots it makes them look like fools but of course that is what I advise you to do never give up you can achieve what you want I want to be a role model to you for that so I'm not saying that my life is perfect and I've done everything right of course not I have made plenty of mistakes myself but I never gave up I kept trying, I kept trying to do the right thing regardless of everything that went wrong in my life and as you can see I've managed to create this YouTube channel a website, my TikTok I've managed to gather 165,000 subscribers in just five years over 40 million views inspiring millions of people around the world I've had hundreds of clients that I've spoke to on the phone I've done all of these things and it's not just for myself but it's for you it's to show you that yes it is possible never give up doing the right thing it does work it will get you the results that you need hard work pays off narcissists don't want you to think that it does because it never worked for them they had to resort to their manipulation but it does work if you put in the time, the effort you will get something back it might not work the first time if you fail, you just have to try again try something else but never give up never give up on yourself the narcissists gave up on themselves a long time ago so we should have already known that we didn't have anything come in, of course if they've given up on themselves on their true character and they've resorted to manipulation deception and future faking of course, they're going to give up on us that should be expected a person who has given up on themselves they've given up on doing the right thing of course they're going to give up on you that doesn't say anything about you it says everything about themselves because I know in myself I've not given up on myself I'm still trying to do what I'm trying to do I'm still trying to inspire millions of people around the world and I'm going to keep doing that for as long as I can and it's to show you that you can do it too you can continue doing the right thing continue doing what you know to be true because it will result in something favorable for you and the people around you as well the people that you love the people that you trust your family, your children and everyone else everyone that you believe in everyone who believes in you but that's really the problem is when a person stops believing in themselves of course they're going to stop believing in you I mean that's the first thing you've got to look for is that they still believe in themselves or at the very least that you're able to inspire some belief in them if you can't do that then they're just going to resort to victim playing or even worse manipulation and you can't do anything with someone like that all they're going to do is manipulate you and pull you down to their level and then you'll end up feeling like something is wrong with you like you can't do anything right you'll give up on yourself at least until you find someone like me someone who's making these videos putting out this content someone who is trying to motivate, inspire and uplift you and that's really all I want to do I do believe that it is my mission to be of service to you yes I do believe that that is my mission in life and I will continue to do that for as long as I can but yes that's it for this video and if anyone knows the title of that movie please do let me know in the comments below I read your comments every day and please share the video if you can on social media subscribe if you'd like to book a one-on-one coaching session with me you can do that on my website which is Narcseviver.co.uk and check out my Instagram as well it's Narcseviver YouTube and Instagram I have new pictures and videos of my travels every day on there other than that that's all I've got to say for this one but I hope you all enjoyed it I hope it was helpful and as always I will talk to you in another video very soon