 Okay do you see it now? Not yet. Do you see it? It says we're live. Okay on the. Wait hold on. There's an ad. Oh we're live now. Okay. Hi everyone. Hi. Technical difficulties. Sorry. Sorry we're a bit late. Alright. Okay. Well hi everybody. Hi. Hi I'm Gabby. And I'm Linda. Nice to meet you. So welcome to our YouTube live. Sorry for the technical difficulties. But this live is meant to be interactive. And so we can go back and forth. So please use the chat box down below and drop your two cents and your ideas on whatever we're discussing. Whether you agree, disagree, like or dislike what we're saying or have anything to say to add to the conversation. So please use the chat box below. I see Lamar has already typed something from the chat. Hi Lamar. Hi Lamar says I need help. I'm 13 and dealing with stress and anxiety. Please tell us a little bit more about what's causing your stress and anxiety. While you type we'll keep progressing with this live but be as detailed as possible so we can help you the best way possible. Okay. So by the way we've added a new feature, a cool new feature to our live streams. It's called Super Chat. If you see where you type in the chat box underneath it there's like an emoji, grey icon and then like a rectangle dollar sign grey icon. If you click that you can send us some love by donating a small amount to help our channel. It helps fund our videos so we can keep creating helpful contents for you. Hopefully you have been following our videos and find them useful and helpful for whatever you're dealing with at this present moment. Your donations help us reach more people who need help dealing with mental health. As you know our channel deals with mental health especially for youth, young adults on loneliness, depression and anxiety. So if you want to help support that then please donate to us in the Super Chat. For anyone who donates over $25 in the Super Chat we will schedule a separate 15 minute one-on-one session with you to help you with something specific. So let's say for example you don't get your question answered here or you want to talk a little bit more privately one-on-one about a specific thing that you're going through then donating to our channel we'll get you a 15 minute one-on-one with us in the Super Chat. Yes. Great. So our live today is going to be an open discussion about mental health and mental health can mean so many things and can encompass a large number of topics. So in honor of World Mental Health Day that just passed on October 10, we're going to talk about two topics that we personally connect to and that affect many young people and people young at heart. And that is loneliness and depression. Yes. So as I mentioned before our channel specifically talks about mental health for youth, young people on topics of loneliness, depression, anxiety and stress relief. But we do realize that loneliness and depression are not just limited to young people that anyone at any age at any point in your life, any income, any religion, any background can experience loneliness and depression. So if you weren't lonely before, if you are doing just fine, I believe that this era of social distancing and uncontact as they call it, uncontact is now making our sense of loneliness, isolation, maybe depression, hopelessness a bit worse. So I just want to get that out there that you know I'm a people person and I definitely miss hugging people I miss contact I miss the days when we can rub shoulders with each other in the subway and it was okay and you can sneeze in public and no one looks at you like you have the plague or something. But yes, so I just wanted to get that out there I don't know if you guys are feeling that way to you guys are people people. Yeah. So who here I want to hear in the chat of who here has felt even more lonely and depressed at the state of things now. It can be about the pandemic, the crazy election that we're having this year. Anything. Can you type your response in the chat box and we'll be answering your questions based off of your responses. So let's take some time maybe Gabby, let's read some of the comments that we have here. Alright, so Lamar said depersonalization. That's what triggered it your stress and anxiety. Okay, the depersonalization separation, your mind is not inside of your body it's outside, causing you to focus too much on outside things and not giving enough energy and attention to inside of you. That gap between your mind and your body your mind being outside and you being here is causing the anxiety, causing the depersonalization and causing the stress that comes with it. So we'll touch a little bit more about this as we go further down in our live today if we don't answer your question Lamar, please keep typing in the chat and let us know how we can formulate our answers to better, better guide you through what you're struggling with. And Francine says, Hi, I love you both. We love you to Francine. Thanks Francine. And she says, How do you deal with a narcissistic husband. It's abusive and puts me down. I get depressed, lonely and have anxiety. Yes, I hear your Francine. I'll talk a little bit more about that later but I just want to say that a lot of people not just you a lot of people deal with either a loved one or a boss or a friend maybe someone who maybe crosses the line in too many ways and doesn't show you respect but it's absolutely up to you to stand up and say something to the person and draw that line firmly and not be afraid that as a result of drawing that line that person will now not like you. I think that's what stops a lot of us from not drawing a clear line in our relationships every relationship needs a line and an area of respect that you need to keep for each other. But I think a lot of people are afraid to draw the line because they're afraid if I draw that line then that person is not going to love me anymore that person's going to see me differently so has to go beyond the fear. So what's more important this person loving you or me loving myself and not putting myself through this so we can talk a little bit more about the details of this as we go on Francine so hang tight don't leave. Yes. So, let's see. Rand says, it's been a while, and it's helping me we're glad you're back. So yes, this is our new live that we're back. You know we do a live every single month so we're glad you're joining us here today as well. So, let's. Okay, keep typing in the chat well I promise we'll answer these as we go. I just want to get things rolling a little bit and then we'll talk more about the specifics of what you guys are going through so we'll just keep continuing with this live don't go anywhere. Keep typing. We're listening we're looking. Okay, we'll get to you. So I'll get started with so I did a little bit of research to find kind of the how loneliness and depression has been affecting people nowadays. So according to surveys conducted by the Mental Health Foundation, there are one in four people or 24% that feel more loneliness due to the pandemic. And before it was only one in 10 people so that was only 10% of people so it rose significantly. In terms of depression there were studies that found that depression rose three fold during the during the pandemic than before. So, it rose due to greater exposure to stress stressors like job loss uncertainty, change and loneliness. And so many of us, the, the pen, the surveys showed that many of us can feel lonely from time to time, and those short term feelings aren't really shown to really harm our mental health. When there are big restrictions on what we can do when there's extra stress, extra uncertainty and extra anxiety about the future that impact of long term loneliness on mental health can be very hard to manage. So it was interesting to see how much it rose just due to the pandemic and due to people being more isolated less human contact more, you know, regulations. So the purpose of our lives today is to create a space where we can openly talk about loneliness and depression. I feel that a lot of people as you saw in the statistics suffer from loneliness and depression, and yet not a lot of people talk about it. And, or even admit that they're going through it because there's kind of a social taboo placed on loneliness and depression that if you like talk about it with your friends like they say oh like just snap out of it or pull yourself out of it and pull yourself together so it's very hard to talk about it. And so, you know, we want to encourage you guys to use the chat use the chat and please tell us about your experience with loneliness your expression, your experience with depression because in our live today, Gabby and I will share our personal experiences with it. So we want to have like a table discussion for us to just create a space where it's safe to talk about it, and then just from talking about it, we can feel better and heal and feel like maybe we're not so alone in this loneliness after all. So I want to first share my experience with depression and loneliness because, you know, despite what you may think about the public personality I have on on YouTube, I was not always like this. It was very hard for me to smile actually for the most of my life. And if I see pictures of myself back in the day, before I found brain education before I started any kind of internal practice like, I could not smile. And I would, I have some pictures where I'm literally smiling like this. And I thought I was smiling like, Wow, you know, like inside I thought I was smiling like this, but my face was like, you know, okay, so let me just tell you my story. And if you guys want while I share my story please type about your own experiences to and as I share my story I'm going to answer some of the questions like Lamar, your fear that the world is going to end like I'm going to touch upon that in my story so please keep typing okay type your whatever you want to share. So in my case, I had something that was high functioning depression. So when we think depression we kind of think just one side of depression which is like someone who like is so sad and can't get out of bed and like crying and crying and like just like this, this is what we feel depression is. But there are, there's another side of depression that now I can see that I fell under. And that is someone who is very high functioning, but is feeling depressed and lonely inside. So a high functioning depressed and lonely person looks like this they, they go to school. On the outside they look like they have a lot of friends they have their life together. Everything's just checkbox like they're doing things right on the outside, and it seems like there's nothing wrong with them on the outside because I don't see them crying every day I don't see them like, you know, putting like black eyeliner on their eyes like there's something that indicates that this person is lonely and depressed. And yet, on the inside, I always felt like I had this gaping hole in the middle of my chest. It's a very strange thing to try to explain but no matter how much I tried to fill up that hole with more friends or trying to push myself harder in school for better grades I thought maybe if I got better grades I would feel better. Maybe if I had more friends I would feel better. Maybe if I played more sports I would feel better. Maybe if I went out to play more I would feel better I tried to feel so many external things maybe if I had nicer clothes maybe if I drove a nice car maybe if I had nice things you know but no matter how much I tried to fill it with outside things I still felt so unexplainably empty right here. And it was driving me insane to the point where I felt like if I have this empty feeling in my chest for the rest of my life, then I don't know if I can go on. I don't know if I can live like this for the rest of my life. But on the outside, I didn't show it because I also had a lot of pride I didn't want people to judge me I didn't want people to be like, I don't want people to label me as like Linda is depressed like Linda is a Debbie Downer you know like I wanted to be socially accepted. So I would walk around pretending like nothing was wrong with me but inside I was dying. And I think maybe a key case of something similar to this is what you see in celebrities like a lot of like comedians funny funny people, people who have screaming fans millions of fans who are willing to do anything for them. It looks like they have the best life they have people who love them they have money they have nice houses they have status they have everything that anyone could dream of. And yet you hear stories of these people, all of a sudden, overdosing on drugs and dying committing suicide and dying and you're wondering what is going on I thought this person was okay I wanted to be like this person. So, it's like this loneliness and depression my point is it's not always evidence on the outside that there are people, a lot of people, like me, who are struggling with it internally, and trying to hide it externally, and just going about, like, feeling so empty and hopeless and lost and losing control having no sense of self confidence, as a result of that. Yeah, so that's that was my experience with loneliness and depression and I would say I had this for most of my life, because I grew up in a family environment that was like my parents bought a lot. So it wasn't like a loving, like, have me go lucky like home. There was always fighting always yelling. And then I always carried a lot of guilt to because I felt like I'm the I'm the first child. So a lot of the times like when my parents fought like I thought why don't they just get separated why don't they just go their own way. But then they would say things like, you know, we're together because we have a kid. And at that time I was the only child right. It was before my next brother was born so I was like, Oh, shit, they're together because I exist. You know, so I had this like guilt like my existence is the reason why my parents are unhappy like my existence is the reason why they can't even get separated like I'm the problem. You know, I felt this way for a long time so that also contributed to my depression and loneliness. Yeah, so maybe some of you guys resonate with some things that I'm talking about here. But yeah, let me see some comments in the chat. Let's see. So Francine. When you feel anxiety is an exercise we can do to help get rid of the anxiety attack like tapping. Okay, I'll tell you about this at the end. Rand, I'm always making sure I'm taking all my meds yet I'm dizzy off balance I cannot stand sunlight. I appreciate what you two are doing. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thanks for sharing Rand. Thanks for sharing. Okay friends seen I'm a combination of high function and feeling like I'm feeling like not getting out of bed. I totally understand. I was like that too I would sleep for a long time, because there was nothing for me to look forward to when I woke up. So I would just leave. Yes, Joanna hi Joanna. Hi, I'm so important. Yes. Lamar Savage are you still there because I find therapy really helps. Perry. Hello. Thanks for sharing this Francine yes. Yeah, if you guys can type in the chat where you guys are logging in from that would be really helpful to maybe like city and state. So we know where everyone's tuning in from. Yes. So now I want to share a little bit about looking back how I was able to get out of that loneliness and change my energy from a lonely depressed state to to now where I feel really fulfilled and confident in my own skin. So I think when I look back on it. It had to do with my brain. It had to do with how I wired myself to perceive my life. How I wired myself to think about my situations. How I interpreted my environment interpreted my relationships interpreted the circumstances in my life. So as I mentioned, you know there's a lot of fighting in my household and I felt this emptiness and I couldn't fill it with anything. And my brain, because that was so like, like 10, the most tangible thing that I can feel. I like fixated on that negative thing, you know, I only saw the negative things in my life. And by seeing only the negative side of every situation. I went in a state where I focus too much of my mind and attention on things that I couldn't control. So, like, my parents fighting I can't control that you know it's their choice to fight. I can't control that. And like, like other situations like I can't control how this cool girl at school thinks of me, you know like if I want her to like me but she doesn't like me I can't control that you know. So I was, and I can't control like what colleges I go into, even though maybe let's say I didn't by the way but maybe let's say I wanted to go to Harvard, but if they don't accept me I can't control that right. So I was so focused on like things that I couldn't control things that already happened things that it was up to other people's decision. And because I wanted to so badly control the things that I couldn't control. I was giving all of my energy there. And when I tried to control things that I couldn't control, because I couldn't control that I felt hopeless. I felt like nothing was in my power. And because nothing felt like it was in my power I felt like, well then why do I even try. And like Lamar like you shared you feel this fear like this world is going to end like I felt that way too like, like, Jesus Christ I'm working so hard and I feel like I can't get a job out of college I feel like the world is going to end why do I try and I was focusing on these things that I couldn't control, but I wasn't seeing that there's the other side of how to interpret every circumstance and situation in my life which was how can I see the same thing in a positive light. What are the aspects that I can control. For example, like, I talked about let's say I wanted to go to Harvard, but I didn't get accepted to Harvard. I can't control Harvard's decision to not accept me. But what I in that same situation what I could control is how I talk to myself as a result of that. So I think more than Harvard not accepting me. It's like me saying like, oh man Linda see nobody wants you you're a messed up student. Why do you even try like that kind of thoughts that comes after it is what makes someone suffer more. It was my choice to talk to myself in a negative way, or talk to myself in a positive way. So when you focus on the things that you can control in every situation that really made me feel like okay you know what, I do have power. Not everything is hopeless. And I'm not here. Like Lamar said, feeling that sense of like I feel like the world is going to end. There's no hope. You know what this this might sound really bleak, but it's fact and true that every single one of us is going to die at some point. You might sound like oh my god Linda how can you say that that's so bleak that's so terrible, but it's true. There's not a single person no matter how rich you are no matter how pretty popular you are who avoided that. Right. So if you think about it that way, you can't control the fact that you're going to die. This is inevitable everyone's going to die. But you don't try to touch that you don't try to cheat death. But what you do is, then, since I can't control death, I can control life. Until death comes. How do I choose to create my life story is completely up to me. I'm just focused on the fact that I can't control death and my and I ruined my life, trying to fix this. Then your narrative will be one of continuous anxiety victim consciousness, trying to focus all the time on something you can't control which is what makes you nervous anxious stress lonely depressed. You just leave things you can't control as they are. And then you look at, wait a minute, but I can control what happens until the point of death. Then you can make the most out of your life here, and you can write your life story however you want, using your own power. That's the important thing. That's what you need to focus on. That's what help that kind of shift is what made me get out of the loneliness and depression. And be able to say, you know what, I'm not a victim. I'm a master of my life and I have choices in how I choose to live my life. That was a very important turning point. Yes. That was very long but I felt like that was very my honest truth. That was a really good sharing, like very clear and like how you got out of it as well. Really. So I wanted to share a little bit as well to, but more on how the pandemic has affected me and how loneliness and depression has really been worse during the pandemic just like for so many people. Like Linda said, it's been a matter of choice and a matter of choosing to during the depression and during these situations to make yourself happy to choose to look at the positive things when it's really hard to. So just like everyone the pandemic has certainly changed my day to day life and has made me more feel more lonely and more depressed. And I'm someone who kind of tries to ignore my emotions and bury them and not confront them so I tried to do things to distract myself. And I tried to really bottle everything up and just not not face it and I know that's like many people you just, you know you try to like trick yourself and distract yourself so during lockdown and the pandemic. I had more opportunities and more time to really open up and face my emotions, which has helped me release a lot of them and release like the dark heavy energy that I bottle up inside and there's just many things that happened recently like I lost a loved one and so it just made things even extra hard and difficult, but I felt like I didn't really have control over my circumstances like Linda mentioned, just hard, you know things seem like they're falling apart so this is definitely something that many people are experiencing to like many things are out of our control. The way I've been kind of dealing with it and going through it is making it a daily choice to choose to be happy or to be positive or look at the situation in another way. So it's very easy for all of us to feel stuck in a negative state. It's a real overpowering and it can be hard to say you know why should I be happy so everything may seem hopeless but ultimately it's your choice whether you choose whether your environment dictates your emotions and your feelings, and being able to smile is really not much to smile about. So that may sound kind of forced or not natural in the beginning but it's an indicator that shows just how much your brain is dependent on your environment to make you happy. So this really ties into what Linda said and also I saw a comment from Paul. He said how do you limit loneliness in this time of isolation. So I would answer that with it's your choice just just how I said it's your daily choice when you wake up every day to not let your surroundings and circumstances take over in a negative way to choose to be happy. It's all under your power and it's all under all our power but we just don't always use that power. It's really becoming the master of your brain and the master of that power of choice that you have. So can you guys share if you've had loneliness if you've had depression. I know some of you guys are joining the webinar the live a little bit later so you weren't able to see the people before who already shared some other experiences but I really want to hear your experience with loneliness and depression and if you were able to overcome it. How did you overcome it if you're still struggling with it that's okay there's absolutely nothing wrong with that there's no right or wrong answer. And what are some of the key takeaways that you've experienced from your own battles with loneliness and depression. So meanwhile while you guys type that we can address some of your comments in the chat that we weren't able to address before so maybe Gabby can we read some of the chats that weren't mentioned. Sure so Perry is said he's from still water Minnesota hello and Francine is from New York City and Joanna says I've lived with anxiety and depression for decades due to abuse I use all natural means to help me as I don't like medication. Yeah. So it seems like there's a couple people who are facing some kind of abuse, whether it's psychological or physical. And you know I just want to get it out there that if someone is abusing you there's nothing wrong with you. When someone treats someone poorly. It's a reflection of their inner struggle, their chaos, their battle that they should be dealing with themselves but they're not strong enough to handle it on their own they take it out on somebody else. So the first thing that people think if they're receiving abuse is that there has to be something wrong with me that I'm not lovable that I'm doing that it's all my fault and you might be stuck in that state where it's like me I'm the problem, but it's not you at all. It's not you at all and if you're abuse the abuse that you're feeling is very bad. I, I really really suggest you ask for help in your community. There are many different resources for like abuse hotlines and stuff like that. But for the sake of just, you know, speaking openly and candidly in this live here. I mentioned this earlier too but if someone is crossing the line of not respecting you and not treating you like the way you should be treated. Then it's totally 1000% up to you to put that line down without fear of what the other person will think of you. So a lot of the times when people are afraid to put that line down it's because you're afraid of, if I set this line, then this other person will not love me anymore. This other person will judge me. This other person will abuse me more maybe, you know, but it's not even about this other person it's about you at the end of the day when you feel this abuse when you feel mistreated, treated, disrespected by somebody. I think what taunts us more than the abuse and disrespect itself is how I play that scenario over and over in my head when I'm alone. How I analyze it and how I feel like I'm so mad I wasn't able to protect myself or stand up for myself. I think that eats away at our consciousness and our mind more than what outside people are doing to us. So then at that moment you have to see, okay, if I really care about myself, if I really value my self care over anyone else's love or recognition, then I have to act in a way that puts me first. There's no shame and guilt in putting yourself first. Actually that's the biggest misconception, the biggest wrong teaching that society has taught us that putting yourself first, you're selfish, you should be selfless, you should put others before you. No! No! You have to take care of yourself first because if you don't take care of yourself, if you don't know how to take care of yourself, then you will not know how to take care of other people. It's plain and simple. If you don't know how to play the piano, there's no way you can teach piano to somebody else. Right. It's plain and simple. If you don't know how to love yourself, you can't teach love to other people. If you don't know how to take care of yourself, you don't know how to teach love and care to other people as well. So it's totally up to you. You have the power to set boundaries in your relationship and you absolutely should. Why? Because it's an active self-love for you. Yes. Okay, I think there's more. Yes. So some more comments. Rand says, living in Las Vegas. Hello. Joanna is from London, UK. She also says, catastrophizing is part of anxiety. It's horrible, but you can talk yourself out of that feeling. Yes. Francine says, we read Paul's how to limit loneliness and isolation. Francine says, can you say those three things again? I can control, stay positive. So I think this was when you were sharing your story, Linda. Yeah, so it's not like, I don't have like a list of things that you should change. It's more so like in every situation that's making you feel hopeless, that's making you feel lonely and making you feel depressed. How can I interpret that situation in a positive light? So for example, like I have this drink here, right? It's in a glass bottle. If I look at it in a negative way, I can use this bottle to knock somebody out. I can use it to bonk somebody in the head and knock them out. That's me using this in a negative way and seeing what kind of negative way I could like interpret this bottle. But then on the other side, if I look, if I, the same bottle, nothing different, even the amount of liquid in here is the same. The same exact bottle I look at it on the positive side. How can I use this bottle for positivity? Wait a minute, I'm thirsty. Let me drink out of this bottle. And quench my thirst. It's the same darn product, but you're using it in a good way or using it in a negative way. Just like this, every situation in your life, whether it be death, whether it be a divorce, a breakup, anything can be interpreted in a bad way in a negative way. Even this coronavirus, even this pandemic can be interpreted in a very negative way or it can be interpreted in a positive way. Everything has a positive and a negative. So it's up to you to decide, am I going to interpret every situation in my life for me to be the victim, for me to feel like there's no hope. I feel so lonely, so depressed, anxious as the way to get out of it. Or am I going to say, okay, Linda, snap out of it. Let me see how I can focus on the good side of this. And that is rewiring, retraining your brain to become what we say a power brain, as Ilchi Lee calls it, the founder of brain education. Yeah, positive brain. That's how you take back your brain, take back your brain to rewire to be positive. Not forcing yourself saying, Linda, you have to be happy, you have to be positive because nobody likes negative people, not like this. Rewiring your brain to look at things in a positive way. This can be a weapon of death, or it can be a weapon of thirst quenching. It's the same darn thing. The only difference is how I choose to see it. Yeah, yes. Okay. So more comments, Rand says hope from Durango Center is helpful all the time she told me to study with you so our thank you, Linda and Gabby. Joanna says I lost my job so now I'm taking an educational course I left an abusive partner and now I'm in therapy all during the pandemic but I'm using rock bottom as my starting point and the only way is up. Exactly. Yes, exactly. When you're at rock bottom the only way to go is up. So like you did, like you did there Joanna. Some person can say I'm at rock bottom. Oh, woe is me. I'm just going to stay here I feel hopeless I feel like I lost my job. Nothing's going for me and you can just stay there that's your choice, but like you just said, wait a minute. Rock bottom means that the only way that I can go, whatever I do is up. So let me just do everything try everything and not be afraid. So good just like that. Yes, she also says I feel incredibly lonely but I'm using the time to practice self improvement because I didn't have the time before. It's a perfect way to use this extra time during the pandemic as many people have had more time at home and you know, more like time to contemplate and reflect on what they're doing who they are and things like that so that's great that you're using this time to really do some introspection and another comment I was abused as a child and ended up in an abusive romantic relationship but I left them a couple of months ago and now I'm learning to heal. Yes. Yes. See now this is an opportunity to start fresh to write a different story. You've written the story of abuse for so long from a child to now it reflects in your romantic relationship. So now folding that and moving on. It might seem like oh I feel lost I feel empty. So let's let go of something that's familiar if, especially if that familiar feeling is abuse but as a result of having closed this now you can rewrite a new narrative of your life story. You go girl girl girl girl girl yeah Perry also said you go girl. Thank you girls. So Francine has one more question so how do you feel, how do you feel not so lonely. That's a very good question. So, and this goes back to what Paul was saying above about how to not feel so lonely during the pandemic when we're all in isolation. So Paul if you're still here I want to give my two cents about your sharing too so when you feel lonely. So when we talk about loneliness in our practice in brain education. We say, ultimately, loneliness in an energetic spiritual aspect. It stems from me, not knowing who I am. Me not knowing myself. So me not having a relationship with my own self is what ultimately subconsciously is driving that sense of emptiness and loneliness that you feel inside. It has nothing to do with how many friends you have or contact, because as I mentioned before, when I felt that gaping hole of loneliness in my chest I had many friends around me. I had many people, and this was before the coronavirus so we were rubbing shoulders sneezing on each other hugging eating this close to each other, you know. Those things were happening and yet I felt so incredibly lonely, like nobody understood what I was saying, even though my friends were listening felt like nobody understood what I was saying, nobody understood my struggle fully. So that I felt like isolation. So when I look back on that situation and when I learn from ill chili who mentored me through brain education is my loneliness and everybody's loneliness because on a fundamental level, we all as human beings operate very similarly. The loneliness we feel inside has to do with the fact that I don't know myself really. So these key questions I want to ask you friends scene. What do you want. Do you know exactly what you want in life. And another question and anyone can answer this to in the chat. Another question is, who are you. Do you know who you are, who and what you are. Do you know what you want. And lastly, do you know where your life is going. These three questions. If you really think about it are very complicated. Right there. They seem simple, but they're very hard. But if you think about it, not like reflecting back on me if you just think about like, who am I what do I want where is my life going. Like that's the who what where. In this situation, those are the fundamental answers you need to assess the problem. There's a problem, you always say, who, what, where, like a mystery, you know, there's a murder mystery you say, who, what, where, to understand something on a fundamental level. Like, if I have a phone and I want to understand it, who, what, where, right, right, who made it, what is it, where do I find what I need. Okay, so same thing with your life too, but nobody asks you this in school nobody teaches you this in school. Nobody trains us to think about myself. My life. Who am I. What do I want. Where is my life going. These three fundamental questions are what you need to answer and be clear about for you to have a clear understanding and relationship with yourself. So most people don't know how to answer me when I say, who are you, what do you want, where's your life going. And that the fact that we can't answer those questions is actually the fundamental root of your loneliness. It means you are not clear about this life that exists inside of you. That's why you try many things go many places, try to find many spiritual teachers try to read many books do all this this this but nothing is really satisfying. Keep looking, keep looking, keep looking, but it's because you don't know inside. Who am I, what do I want. Where is my life going. So energetically spiritually ill chili founder of an education teaches and also taught me when I first heard this question I was like, I was like, what in the world. Hardest questions to answer. Right, they're the hardest but they're actually very simple fundamental things that you should know about your life. So, even after this live. I want you to think about that. Who am I, what do I want. Where is my life going. That's where that real relationship to know who you are to know what this life is inside of you. That's where the real journey starts. It has nothing to do with age, you could be 119 years old and still not know the answers to these questions, or you could be a five year old and know exactly the answers to these questions, but that's where everyone should start. I suggest you start looking to resolve the loneliness that you feel inside, not anywhere else, it doesn't exist in a new partner, a new job, new house, new car has nothing to do with that. It's the answers the clear answers you have about those three questions. Yes. All right, so I just want to reiterate. So going forward from here. If you in the audience if you're still feeling lonely and depressed, and the environment around us is feeling more lonely more isolated more disconnected. Even in this pandemic, there's a good way to interpret and a bad way to interpret everything in our environment everything we experienced every person we meet. So how we create our emotions, based on our circumstances is totally up to us. It's totally up to you. So don't look for others to solve your problems is totally up to me. You. Follow your shoulders. Yeah, up to you. So it's up to me to decide how do I choose to train my brain. Yes, so the pandemic and Coronavirus has really helped us to think how we can do things differently and let go of old systems that we see don't really serve us or haven't served us well, and rethink what's important and how we should do things. You could really look at the pandemic that way if you try, you know, we see it met the media and everywhere puts it as like the most negative thing, but it has really helped a lot of people to slow down and look within and kind of contemplate these things. So in a strange way, the Coronavirus is a chance for us to create something new and better for ourselves and for others around us. And it has forced us to slow down and take care of ourselves and practice better hygiene like wash our hands like we didn't use to wash our hands this often or this well before I don't remember the last time I washed my hands this much. Or so really like made us focus more on ourselves and like taking care of ourselves. So some people can see the pandemic as and their situations as an opportunity for change. And some people can see it as just a hopeless destruction and just the most awful thing. They're both right, but which one do you choose to be on the side of. That's what you have to think about as well. And that's what can help you kind of get out of loneliness and get out of depression a little bit more. Yeah, I love what you said Gabby the last thing you said that whether you feel like the Coronavirus is an opportunity for change or something that's a means of hopeless destruction, whichever side you're on, they're both right. So it's no use fighting about who's right you guys are both right. It's just which one do you choose to believe. Right. So what do you guys think about that I want to hear your opinion so have you ever thought that maybe just maybe all the things that are happening are happening for good, despite what the media says about rising death tolls and no vaccine until later social distancing forever and all this blah blah blah blah blah no matter what the media says, have you thought about maybe the things that are happening are happening for good. And how can you take this dire situation that we are experiencing globally as humanity, or your own personal struggle whatever is happening in your microcosmos. How can we interpret that into a blessing in disguise. Right. Yes. So when I see some activity in the chat. Joanna says sadly it's quite late here in London so I have to go but it's been lovely to connect and I'll watch later on thank you take care everyone lots of love. Thank you Joanna for joining Joanna sleep well in London. Yes. Thanks everyone for saying thank you to Joanna and bye. I wanted to share a few, you know on our channel we have many resources for and many videos for so many of these topics related to mental health, especially loneliness depression and anxiety. So, on our channel, if you go to our main page, we have a playlist called 10 minute routines and in there Linda does these 10 minute routines for all kinds of topics, all kinds of symptoms physical emotional mental. So I would recommend this routine for everyone to find you know you can go on it and just search what kind of thing you're experiencing and find the videos for you so we have videos in there and then we have our life hacks playlist as well, which are brain hacks so it's you know helps to kind of understand the principle more of kind of what you're going through we have to have all these topics as well so I'll put the link of these two playlists for you in this chat so that you can check them out and you know try them out. Perry says 10 minute routines are the bomb. I think they're great Linda, you know, does them so clearly and so well. Thanks guys. Alright so what do you guys think about everything that we just said I don't know if Lamar is still here but he shared something earlier in the chat so I'm wondering Lamar are you still around. I see Perry still here Francine, Paul, thank you. And some others who are quietly watching in the background, Rand. But I'm going to read some of your comments that you guys said so Perry yes I find that we have to be more authentic and find what makes everyone most comfortable. Very true. I agree. Francine I love your time and routines I must look for the ones for mental. Yes, I just shared the link. Awesome. Thank you so much. Yeah, if anyone has anything else that they want to add to the discussion. Because this was meant for an open discussion about loneliness and depression, creating a safe space for us to talk about something that could be taboo in your normal outside circle something that's a little difficult to talk about with your other normal friends. If you need to vent please type and vent. This is your safe zone no judgment. We're all here to support each other so if you have something that you want to get in there last minute like actually I've been dealing with please feel free to type. Right. And if you have anything for more comments or anything I'm just going to say if you want to take back your brain a great way to promote your that you took back your brain is our t shirt. So on that Linda's wearing it's our super soft cotton unisex t shirt. It says take back your brain is I always say it's a great conversation starter because you walk anywhere with this shirt people are like what's this about and then you could tell them. I took back my brain and happy healthy and peaceful. And I'm working on my mental health and myself so you know you could talk about all those kinds of things with people so we'll share the link for that if that's something you'd like to promote and represent. Yes, I just put the link in the chat for you guys. If you want to rock a t shirt enjoying the brain gang. Yes, you can do so with this merch t shirt. Yes. And then before you guys go I hope that this live was useful and helpful educational and fun spending time with us here live back and forth on our channel. We do have this super chat function that I mentioned earlier in our live. It's under your chat where you type. It's a rectangle with a dollar sign. It's where you can love donations for us if you're making a few if you appreciate the work we're doing for youth mental health, loneliness, depression, anxiety. It's your way to kind of show us some love, but by no means you're not obliged to do so but just like putting it out there. If you want to show some extra support for our channel, then we welcome your love donations that we use to fund more videos on our channel. Yes. Yes. All right, so friends, let me see. So let's read some last minute comments. All right, so Perry says I find that we have to be more authentic and find what makes everyone most comfortable. Yes, so your true self you have to find your true self. And teach that you know connect to yourself and find when you answer those three questions that Linda mentioned, and it could be a long process it's not something that is really easy to find but when you answer those three questions you can really find what's true to you and your true self. Yes. And Francine said I love your 10 minute routines. I must look for the ones for mental. Thank you. Yes, we shared the links. And then one more comment Perry says I compare myself to others quite a bit but I'm working on it. You're not alone. You're not alone. We're all working on it. So if anyone has any last minute questions comments or concerns please leave them down below. Yes, Francine I see your comment you both are wonderful thank you so much xoxo xoxo back to you virtual xoxo. That's a great t shirt yes Francine go get one get one and where where one together with us during our next live we have a live every month. Yes and the best way to get notified by them is to subscribe to our newsletter on our website brain education TV calm. There is a place where it says sign up for newsletter so we send out emails every single week about our new videos new latest news about us. And then also our social media channels so our Facebook and Instagram we post about our upcoming lives there as well. Yes, or even better you can go to our homepage on YouTube YouTube comm slash brain education TV, click that bright red subscribe button. And then next to it there's a bell you click that bell and you will get notifications of each new video and each new live that we have so that's another great way to stay connected. I think that's it. That's it for today's discussion. Did you guys enjoy. Yes. Yeah, Francine it's every month. Yes, we do one every single month on relevant topics, you know things that people are going through so. Yeah, check us out it's usually like the second or third third second or third Tuesday of every month usually we do. Yes. Yeah. Alright everyone well then I think that's it for our live today. We're so excited and happy to see you guys here I hope next month you come back. Yes, we'll love you. Yeah we can get more discussions going and we'll send a send an email and social media and do more notifications later on in November when we come up with the topic for next month, but it'll probably be another like something like this on some other mental health topic. So it would be on the same similar lines of loneliness and depression but a different topic to discuss within mental health. Yes. All right, well thank you everyone so much we love you. We love you. Stay safe. Bye. Be happy. Yes.