 TLO what's We are on twitch We are not live, but you can leave a like comment subscribe turn on your post notification bell Let's continue to grow the family from Chicago to the UK Right above me if we do go live and you haven't missed it This is where things will be highlights and things of that nature. Don't forget. We do got the patreon This is a list of everything that's currently on there man appreciate all my patreon family man Salute, let's grow it. Don't forget. We do got the merch Appreciate everybody who cops something man. That's that's rude. This is if you cop merch, you're really above and beyond You do on a lot. I appreciate it The link to all that's down in the description, but this this I feel like this funny I'm gonna put it on you cuz I don't want them to read for me. I want to read on myself, but British means Must do's for foreigners when visiting England. Okay I feel like I'm a nationalist at this point though When I was visiting a homeless man saw me looking at a big bin and said boy They don't have clocks in America It's so funny how Americans don't have proper cheese. Like what is this? Yeah, you're going fast Are you okay? It's not until I started frying food on tiktok that I didn't know that we didn't have proper cheese chocolate dairy eggs There's a litany of things that aren't are not right here even Chicken like bogus. I was today years old when I found out these bad boys go this deep into the ground What is that? Oh, that's a mailbox That's the same thing she said my back Brits encouraged to get rats as past as they are Social, intelligent and friendly Hopefully the rats can pass these traits on To the British people I like the British people's personalities, man I found my favorite tumblr post again British people be like Wakes up during a heart transplant Right. What's all this? Hey, hey when I read that I like to think about a Carl Pilkenton Do British people still do the accent when nobody's around? This is a good question No, cuz really like think about it Like you know how you be I can't be the only one that I got you when you got a voice in your head And you trying to think you thinking about stuff in your head There's a voice and it's normally your voice is that voice for y'all in y'all accent I don't know why I have these on Every British politician sounds like a dark soul boss. Wait now you're going too fast The Lord Adonis the Lord Faulkner of Thornton the Lord archer of Western Super Mar Rio the barrenness back well of Hardington, Mandevo Dark souls. I never played the game the father protecting his daughter's ears during the Blitz 1990 1941 I don't know what the Blitz is Is British food really that bad? No, it's not honestly. It's not Some of it, but not all of it. I had um a crab paste today terrible It may correctly yes Praying for the people in England Don't ever talk to me about airplane What happened there? They live that way. What? Some of these I got an unmute. Let's just unmute cuz this could take forever That's a fiesta or a focus. I can't actually tell focus mate. I'm trying but I have ADHD No, it's a focus not focus like Stranger things was British bit odd in it. There are three hundred crying but I have ADHD if stranger things was British bit Bit odd a bit bit odd isn't it stranger things bit odd in it. That's fine odd in it There are 319 beans and eight sausages in a can Well, who took the beans out the can and counted each individually like this like you are no life in the Heinz can of beans That's it. You don't have a life and of Heinz beans pork sausage British people. We like I'm British It's because it's cuz they drank the tea Yes, they drank the tea. You can't park their mate Friday. His hands are boxing glove level It's because they drank the tea. You can't park their mate Friday His hands are boxing like wives is handsome. Who is this? Is this our president? Who is this? Who is this? Is this Joe Biden? He drinks some more water. Yeah, his hands are boxing glove level whoever told whoever told me to come to London Me to come to London owes me an apology scrapper Scrap outside Parton school on grass if anyone wants it Outside parton school on grass if anyone wants it You're a fully grown man offering to fight people outside of school get a fuck grip mate and keep off the drink What the fuck you on about you fucking muppet scrap metal Keyboard worry now this is honestly in my comments. This is what y'all this is how y'all be sounding to me I'll be looking like Keyboard warrior a very British looking street in America sign it work today. It did look British That was probably like Phillip Pennsylvania spider's infestation problem is mostly results or That's that's they move in different with a cold commercial. This is 16 minutes of memes Unskippable you getting that bag into all the skipper The spiders have learned to use the printer message from the dog groomers. Hi Dexter is dead. Hi Dexter is ready now Sorry stupid autocorrect. He had a great time thought I found 20 pounds on the bus wasn't a great mood until I unfolded it And it was some sort of religious pamphlet geezer in front of me on the train is using a twix as a pillow It's a waste of a twix now. It's crooked. Who eats crooked twixes This guy is a menace decent three out of four star burger and chips, but the cache was fit So it bumps it up to five high Tesco's I've got a serious problem with one of your products. Hi Adam Could you please elaborate? Yes. Why on earth has your shampoo turned my dog pink anyone know this man He entered my garden and helped himself to my fungi. He was unrepentant when I spoke to him bored So does anyone want to fight? I will give you 50 quid if you win, but you probably won't cheers Tony woman eats pasta with gravy now people want to ban from it Tilly yeah, can't play you pushing it. I know y'all put I put y'all put gravy on a lot of stuff And it gotta be onion gravy, but on pasta is crazy to be fair ordered a 250 millilitre portion of garlic sauce with our takeaway, and I don't know what I was expecting But it wasn't this How does it even stay structurally sound the whole this don't it got like Don't it got like holes in a bar? I can't work out whether this lad is still in school or has worked in insurance for the last 25 years the fact that Newcastle briefly had an upmarket sit-down version of Greg's called Greg's movement truly was peaked in 2010 this sword was found during the search of a vehicle earlier today. Thankfully it's been taken off The streets you're doing God's work made lost an ancestor to a sword like that in the 13th You do it God's work lost a sense of lost an ancestor to a sword like that in 13th century I'm not gonna lie man. The weaponry carry around never ceases to amaze me man This is the same sword they pulled out that stone and he became king or whatever It's entry for a dish cuisine. Why is it that color green? What is this on top? What is that fried article right there best in the world then peas look like the soldiers from the Poisonous story have been melted. Did you know the only reason there are pyramids in Egypt is because they are too heavy to carry to the British Museum my postman has left his sack on my doorstop. What does this mean? Am I the postman now? It was just banter the British Museum will take anything but jokes extra second added to green man So fatties can cross the road accountant 38 bullied at work wanted to go out with a bang So stole 170k from his bosses and spent it all in one weekend on drugs and women. I Can't even be mad at bro. The probability of you being born was around 1 in 400 trillion That's why we got a cherished life in fuck's sake. Can't win a tenner on scratch card, but can win this shite Existence nice one school bullies in America wouldn't last five minutes in the UK No, they would they would bring an M4 though Why would they bring a motorway to school new record fastest time to drink a Capri Sun? Confident I could smash this record married man drives 400 miles to meet Facebook woman only to discover It's a hoax set up by rival football That's not this is real hooliganism right here fans man proposes to girlfriend using the side of a cow Man who stole 200,000 Cadbury's cream eggs jailed the getaway Yeah, we can't man who ate 124 kebabs in a month says it left him physically and psychologically Psychologically obviously it will leave you physically damaged. That's what in one month That's like for a day. Of course, you're gonna gain an incredible amount of weight You're gonna have probably some artery problems And then you're gonna be sad that you got that you can't move properly and you sweat when you use the bathroom Or take a shower. So of course Mitched what's worse German humor or French hygiene British food morning of my dad's I'm not gonna lie British food is not that bad But like if you scroll through my tick tock and look at some of the stuff I made just all sight looking at it You might question it like yo, what is this? Wedding I was 14. Why do I look like a disgraced UKIP candidate? Never not laughed at this What's missing from this Christmas dinner and oven? This is a real movie coming next year. I can't This movie was ass Wait fucking hell Paddington took a dark turn since the queen died bark bark see a short story How do you delete someone off facebook from school that you do not like this is insane to think about Mental man always thought tokyo was in japan. What are you doing in this situation hiding in wh smith because that shop refuses To die Be aware these kids are smashing windows in roseworth when asked what they were doing. They said smashing windows That's the british for you know, they don't really lie. They don't really lie They tell you exactly what's going on. What do you look what does it look like? Very rude message mowed into a field near the gloss gesture border What would you say to princess diane if she was your mother? What's for dinner mom? I made a device that checks the council website and lights up to show you what color bin to put out I call it the bindicator woodland beauty spot haunted by ghost that tells people to fuck off Can you lot fuck off with the british thing already? I wish british people took jokes as well as they took other people's cultural artifacts gary linaker Through his entire career without receiving a booking. So did my father lovely fella, but a shit dj I accidentally wore a green t-shirt in aster long story short. I'm now covering sandra's shift On a sunday rescuers learn that the exotic bird they found was actually a seagull covered in curry can't be to full english Bacon's not cooked long enough mushrooms don't look like nothing's cooked here along enough It's all raw Cook this with sunlight There's not much sunlight in the uk so like he looks like a microwaved gordon ramsey don't go out tomorrow Why it windy to the barber in maulie who did this to my Unaccompanied 13 year old may I suggest you do not give stupid haircuts to minors without an adult present This is ridiculous ariana grande is now dating wild stone raider. What's that rat looking thing? That's singer ariana grande Yeah Who's this other guy Well stone raider awful what oh is that the dude from um From the clips of the football clips Chipshop paid seven pounds 60 for a kebab hardly any meat nan was burned rubbish never going there again Sorry to hear about you nan. I hope she gets wealth Bear girls renames his alarm clock to opportunity clock because alarm has negative connotations What are you doing today? I'm in hospital. Oh, no. Why having my baby. Uh gutted. I am not out tonight, man Poor kid brits be like peter parker a man pours beer Brits be like peter parker peter parker For that Gutted I am not out tonight, man poor kid brits peter parker peter parker Be like peter parker a man pours beers into an ashtray for his dog at a pub in manchester We used to be a proper country Yeah, man. It's yum yum Why do you have a portrait of hacker of cbb soon? It's my dog that passed RIP. I think we should change every public bin to a frog bin. I'm bringing sexy back get it because he's doing A double chin and cross-eyed face you You sir have won the internet I'm bringing sexy back Get it because he's doing a double chin Cross-eyed face you sir have won the internet Assess, okay, no for today UK hit by Cadbury's 99 UK hit by Cadbury's 99 flake and flake shortage Just wanted to send my best wishes to everyone sitting there gcsc's today How do you physically get a one in english? Scouts not english one sip of a pint and he's up on the table dancing Can't take this dog anywhere What is the most successful lie in history that these are temporary if you drink cold water? That's in america too. I've seen those and they've been there for years Swarm technically you're a teapot. This is why I love british Dad spends 34 pounds on curry only to find out takeaway had been shut down when he went to get a british people on the website After they accidentally press english us instead of english UK Can I switch my clothes capture into that? What if I want english? British people be like micro crisp my little cabin is starting to take shape michael crisp instead of micro chip I urge every youngster to go out and watch look at how many sausages the lady in gregs gave me thinking I urge every youngster to go out and watch look at First of all those sausages are cooked to perfection. I can see the bread glist I can see the the butter glistening off this bun It looks good that that's just too many sausages for me. I can't put that much meat in my mouth how many Paws Sausages the lady in gregs in the video. That's gave me thinking about the mad clutch control Peppa pig's dad has you know always driving up. It's an automatic. No, it's not That's a uk tv show ain't it so we gotta have a clutch because all y'all cars is clutch What is that a Volkswagen beetle too drop top? Clean ain't it that's steeple Someone hacked into my netflix account last month and watched every episode of coco melon and then left me a note Thanks for everything you legend told my mom. I fancied trainers for christmas And she got me slasenges the men who flooded devon with drugs matey in the middle just talked into these my dad was like I met a guy today apparently. He's pretty famous. I'm like cool who he like I don't know his name and sends a picture. Tell me why it's harry styles The north south divide illustrated by waitrose lol. What the hell hello? I'm the uk government You need to pay 1500 pounds itunes gift card What you on this is the worst scam I've ever seen and if anybody has failed for that like ill Under the rest one of the biggest tragedies in british history This is not the same person This is the same person and all of these Broke went from an abracame and finch motto to this To a parole board Worker like what is going on? Does anyone remember when the whole of uk went yellow back in 2017 the best snapchat story I've ever seen Taking big man to south port for ice cream only do what your heart tells you go to the pub. Okay, mate Hello, mate. I bought a lamp of you, but it didn't turn up. Can you send me proof? It didn't arrive Sure things I do when I'm drunk man today only due to a shortage of tyrell's crisps Walkers will be included in the meal deal. This would instantly vape tyrell's the knockoff version This would instantly vaporize a british person. This looks amazing This is what is this al pastor cilantro onion lime Good sauces That looks good I don't know if y'all flavor palettes is ready for that. That's what they mean by vaporize a british person Yeah, I don't I've never seen a taco in in in in london In any video I've ever done. I've never seen y'all eating a taco And I'm not talking taco bell. I'm talking this Parise a british person bought these pandora charms off some bloke in the pub I'm a monopoly pieces. No, I've got home. I'm thinking they might not be legit people. I call boss kebab shop workers My actual boss dad livid after asda staff allows a seven-year-old son to buy a two pound scratch card Doug walks into pub drinks pint fights dog loses maintains a bowtie pig escapes its pen and wanders streets Teen ends up in paris after a drunken night out in manches That's not far fetched because it's just a train right away in it At funeral today the speaker mentioned what football team the deceased supported and someone booed Nobody cares at all British people could watch their family be murdered and be like, hmm. I didn't quite fancy that do british websites use biscuits My brain is actually gone to mush just after serving a customer and her total came to 17 pounds 50 And I go to her that's 10 to six u.s. Children speaking in british accents because of peppa pig Teresa may Teresa june. This is the greatest She was out of here quick thing i've seen in a long time great britain and his politics never failed to amuse me Sometimes I get sad then this comes across again got a rash use some pseudocrine cut pseudocrine legs full enough Pseudocrine wanted by the police for tax fraud pseudocrine genuinely sold We got something like that in america too where we use it for everything like vix vapor rub type situation Yeah, use some vix vapor rub. You got a cold in your chest. Use some vix vapor rub Your baby got a high fever use some vix vapor rub. You got as vix vapor rub. Yeah, that's what we use All this everything what do they call cameras in europe americans rat? My name is ray and I cannot change it mom replied That's heavy that after being arrested for attempted murder police force is running out of vegan meals because they arrested so many We can skip this one. Yes, sir Stop oil protesters. I've just taken my grandson to the park and some idiot has covered the playground in beans I have cleared as much as I can but I only had one sheet This is the type stuff going on in a UK of kitchen roll. Please be careful holiday to spain ruined by too many spaniards In spanish hotel man dies in lake district while walking out with his friends love the lake district been there many times Entire pavement stolen overnight from village romanian arrived in uk on friday stolen saturday jailed on monday What a life just cost me one pound to put air in my tires used to be 20p. Suppose that's inflation It was a great. Oh, it's dad. W dad joke for you rooftop drama as teens filmed throwing custard creams at helpless bystanders It's just a big clock one rating. I don't understand all the hype with this clock It is literally just a big clock. It's going to be a digital one in 30 The big thing with this clock is you know, I'm saying It's never wrong It's very very accurate Like to the 10th second to the millisecond whatever second is anywhere 10 best restaurants in Birmingham shell garage Seagulls are getting drunk on leftover boo. Florida. There's a lot of garages to that. I mean garages Um gas stations petrol stations that are that serve elite food as well But that says a lot about british food And what people think of it that is gas station is top 10 and throwing up on firefighters One was so drunk it fell off a roof dad who hasn't stopped farting since he ate a ham roll in 2017 Sews for 200k men climbs into speed camera and flashes cars with his phone Half of britain's would refuse free trip to the moon fearing there's not enough to see or that it would take too long Come get your grip you fat bitch dinner's ready in five I can bring it up to you if you're in the middle of something our dad did not share You're a million's jackpot. So we smashed his car up with a hammer. Sorry mom. Phone. Do you want accident? No worries. Had you by accident step Tea bag step I dropped one tea bag two pour pour water three let cool down five minutes Forget me. Hey tea. I'm not reading this car crashes into opticians in kent Does anyone own this cat just seen it knock this fence over favorite go-to breakfast I'm not telling you you will get it banned. Can you turn it down? Others will please stop streaming like a twat or I will volley that playstation out the fucking window This henry hoover nativity scene is very rent free in my head fuming go to wrap my presence thinking I've brought silver wrapping paper clear and I've brought fucking cellophane england Honestly, this might not be bad if it's spread out around the whole piece of Italy just seen this old man struggling to walk down the street after nipping to the shops Saw the young lad stop and asked if he was okay. He carried his stuff and helped the man's arm as he got home This is questionable This reminds me of the old guy and stewie or chris or a family guy It's questionable. Well done that lad credit to his parents. I love online dating such fun and exciting conversations with new people Hey stacey looks like you're killing it in the gym. How long has it been something you're passionate about? Are you recruiting them on linkedin? Not what I was expecting to hear of the bride today Considering it was such a peaceful laid-back wedding. That's lovely. Thank you. Just a quick fyi alex my best man Stabbed my brother last night. So we need him in as little footage as possible Thank you so much for yesterday. What is a person from london called my neighbor is from london He is called rob. Medieval peasants only worked around 150 days in a year The church believed it was important for them to keep happy with frequent mandatory holidays You have less holidays than a medieval peasant. What I think cars looked like 20 years ago What they really looked like british grand pricks today What I think cars looked like 20 years ago. What they really look This is a testament to how old we are at this point in time 20 years ago. That's tough Like I'd still ride one of these down here at audience like british grand pricks today Is this bloke's stack and his mates have made him wear it keeps getting stopped by the police four years ago I was doing trolleys at sainsbury's on a monday night I left worked hard and got a degree from the university of sheffield now I'm doing trolleys at waiters on a friday night never give up That degree man. All of the greek proofs is that you can stick to something For two or four years Reasons i'm miserable i'm british if it weren't for america you would be speaking german right now If it weren't for britain america wouldn't even exist. Hmm. What's the best nickname you've ever heard a sparky I knew looked like elton john and got called socket man Cows are friends not food name one cow your friends with your mom the lowest i'll go is 500 Will you take 100 if I collect now sure my address is sounds good here now go inside It's a comedy club. Yeah head to the stage and tell your jokes to somebody Ah this is petty The else hello, this is the police. Sorry to inform you your rider will probably be arrested I will try to cancel the order for you cut my nephew's hair and he told me he wanted it Like my next door neighbors who's bald on the top and got a little bit of Her on the side So being the great uncle i am i give the kid It's like they're here nor there a little man you're rocking that you feel me do your thing Get what he wanted looking for his keys. Did I solve your question? No, glad to hear that couldn't get a taxi home last night So I went to a takeaway and ordered a pizza to my address and got him with the delivery driver Right now mafia will send i've seen that before so i've seen somebody do that before And it actually worked just give a nice little tip Are you in there? 13 pounds 50 for scran and a taxi home i'm a genius david tenon faked having a personal assistant So he did not have to attend events. He did not want to go to apparently you are not a lot to swear no one leads Stop the world. I'm getting fucked off. What a fantastic role model for youngsters. Fuck off Are you from manchester or just here for uni or something here for uni? Yeah, I thought you looked too exotic Where are you from? Birmingham, right? Just to get things straight. This is the dog My dad took a photo of yesterday So some dope spotted decided to take a picture of my dad's van and posted all over facebook telling everyone to watch your dogs Basically saying he's going around pinching dogs. He took the photo because he couldn't get over how fat the dog was He's a plasterer not a dog pincher And if he was to go pinch a dog, it wouldn't be that fat lump Happy to be a one-star pub if this person's idea of a five-star pub is anything to go by looked okay from the outside Too many local unknown beers to choose from once inside no stellar kronberg etc or any popular global beer We stayed for one pint and left to a proper pub that does well known beers bit of a hippie or trendy crowd To which wasn't oppressive. Also barman is far too enthusiastic and excited about selection of beers So I came out the house at 5 a.m. It's an amazing bar. We want the local stuff This morning to check if the car was frozen and I saw this bloke leaning on a wall with a walking stick I thought he must be out of breath just came to the door now at 6 40 and he's still there I shouted mate are you all right? Then I got in a reply I walked down the road to check on him and it's a smashed trampoline net hanging over the wall Ha ha ha it do look like something Ha ha ha woman feels discriminated by kfc over lack of meat free options I can completely sympathize the other day I went to the world of carpet to buy a new telescope It was astounded and disgusted at the complete lack of optical acquit Yeah, why go to a chicken spot for vegan food like go to a vegan restaurant It almost it's almost as if they would purposely set out to satisfy the needs of carpet buyers But deliberately snubbed those who want utter madness great work by officers for having the sweet smell Of succession the mails were stopped and had bags fall to the brim with confectionery that was obviously not bored Poundy areola Mom bites whatever those are called what are the the balls for consumption by themselves Approximately 367 pounds seized your head of year at school after you catch but why lay it down like this? Which is that one bad lucas aids and chewets at break So you ghosted me no I did not your conversation schools were below par and I carried the conversation all of the time You are nonchalant and expressive and your idea of taking an interest in me was a constant How was your day having a conversation with you was not mentally stimulating? I did not ghost you I just stopped entertaining mediocrity. Wow That's deep Oh man next person that say that i'ma just you take a picture of that Copy paste next time somebody ever say I ghosted them now. I just don't you know, I'm carrying my back hurt I'm carrying this conversation Who's seen our rocket man jetpack deliveries to classroom delivers this week imagine just seeing this man at 132 a.m flying around in a jetpack delivering chicken wedges and a large pizza you would be baffled lad He's clearly overqualified for that job go be a nasa engineer or something He's clearly the better player. Can you just pass it around the back for a second half? I want to eat some toast the tallest mallard duck to ever have lived since the records began known as long boy He lives on the campus of the university of york. He stands over one meter tall A 100 year old london pug. What the fuck did I just say pug a pug's a fucking dog? Half of those i'm not gonna lie more than half of that was funny. I ain't gonna hold you man Tell a little bit like comment subscribe turn of your post and go