 The telegram How'd you like the movies Linda? Two main features were passable to travel on fair comedy wasn't too bad that newsreel really sent me I didn't think the newsreel was so much Pulling my leg. No, honestly Eddie nowadays. I just give you too much What time did we leave the house? Well, it was still daylight. I think we left the house around 5 What time is it now midnight? But don't forget we stopped and had dinner Yeah, but I kind of like that wide screen of course, it's still pretty fuzzy around the edges You said the first time look first time first time you saw a cinema scope. I've never seen cinema scope before Where where a month ago at the same thing what was the picture the flight beyond oh, yeah, you're right I guess I did I guess I just forgot I've been married you for seven years I swear you're the most forgetful man. I know I got more important things on my mind than cinema scope from a month ago Like what like being the chief purchasing agent for the down a air mode of supply company I have to keep a lot of things in my noggin being the head of that all-important department Well, you can remember important facts and figures why can't you remember simple little things around the house like what? Like remembering to buy a washer at the dime store to put in a kitchen sink bosses so it won't leave Oh, it's leek anyone drown yet or like remembering the garbage goes out on Wednesday night and that's Thursday night big deal garbage Like remembering to notify the gas company that the pilot light on our cell keeps going out And if you don't get it fixed soon, I am going to buy a new How about a gas mask it's cheaper Not so funny Open the door I get to bed Well, you got your team in this I forgot mine. I guess it's in my other coat Friday night we speak a little late in the morning. What are you doing, Eddie? Someone let the note they flipped it under the door Don't bend over like that pick it up and read it. Oh, oh, yeah I bet somebody dropped over to visit us. What did you know it one night? We pick it go to a movie somebody comes over The telegram Open it up and read it. I don't have it You just said it was a telegram Who's it from? I don't know it's a notice. We got a telegram. Oh Why'd you say so in the first place give me a chance? Where's the telegram at the telegram office? I guess wouldn't you know it? What's that home all the time? We never get a telegram minute. We step out. Boom All right, it's kind of fun real funny Something can't you call the telegraph office have them read it to you over the phone. Hey, that's right. You can't close the door Right Stay on that notice who tell Grandma? Yeah, what's the union? No, I meant who sent it to us. Oh, well, no It doesn't say it just has our last name spelled in one of the blank spaces Probably from your brother Harry asking for some more money Harry's doing very well since he went into business with the government Eddie your brother being drafted into the army is not going into business with the United States Where's the phone book? Let's look up the number of the telegraph office Here here it is Hey, that's interesting. What did you know that we only got one telegraph office in this town? Yeah, what's the number ever green five seven four four one? What are you doing trying to memorize the number before so I can dial it the number is ever green five seven four four one right Four four one They don't answer why how should I know 11 12 13 14 What are you doing counting the rings? What's wrong 17 rings? They don't answer Honey, let's call the operator why well, I know the phone company takes messages for the telegraph office Maybe they receive them too. Anyway, she'll know why they don't answer With just oh wait just a minute Linda. Let's just forget it for tonight I'll run down in the morning and pick up the telegram Important like what like I don't know what just something important Call you call yourself. I'm sleepy. I gotta go to bed operator I've been trying to get the telegraph office. Do you wish to send the telegraph? No, no We received a notice that we received a telegram only we called the telegraph office, but they don't answer Is that possible one moment? I'll check that for you All right, so wait for one little phone call losing that much sleep isn't gonna make me or break me a local Thank you very much operator Well telegraph office closed no seven o'clock tomorrow morning. You mean today Tomorrow today is tomorrow. It's almost one o'clock in the morning. Let's go to bed Linda. That's a good idea You Why do it Restless, yeah You mean to think you'll get that hedge tomorrow at a hedge What hedge? The hedge in the front yard whereby You promised me last week. You were going to trim it this week. Did you forget I already trimmed the head tonight? Did you? Funny how in some nights a person just can't get to sleep. Yeah Oh That's my signal what I just you on What about it? You know every time I ready to fall asleep. I give out with a big you on Since when do you sense when since when the first time I found out about it? Yes, me. It's a signal for me to keep quiet. It's not very subtle one. Yeah, but you're all way Good night. Good night Wonder what's in that telegram Wonder whether it's good news or bad news Maybe it's good news from my brother Harry. Maybe he got a commission in the army Look, if your brother becomes an officer, it may be good news to him. It'll be bad news for the rest of the Never mind Telegram is probably not from my brother Harry. Oh, who could it be from? Maybe it's from my boss, mr. Downey From your bed or maybe it's about that race I put in for you Remember mr. Downey always sends a telegram or a special delivery letter of congratulations for the employees when he gives them a rain Eddie wouldn't that be wonderful that telegram is about you're right. There'll be nothing short of sensational Wait, you've got that raise now by next year. We could save enough money take that cross-country trip We always want to say that's right. I never thought of that New York Chicago and all points north east south and west Oh boy, here we come Yeah Where a telegram could be from your boss, but what if it's not about a rain? Where else could it be about? They also send telegram when they fire people me fired why that's ridiculous I've been with Downey here motor from the years. I'm indispensable. They'd never fire me. I don't think Besides, what are we worrying about? We don't know what's in that telegram or even who it's from Oh, let's get to sleep Good idea. I am good. Good night. Good night. I'm kitchen. I just boiled some water for coffee You know what time it is. Yeah, almost three o'clock. I Can't sleep either the telegram Now at the table I'll fix your cup Eddie What are you sniffing you know what I'm sniffing gas Escaping from the pilot light on stove the pilot light which I have reminded you to get fixed for about the last Where's the instant coffee jar up on the spice shelf by the stove and if you don't get that pilot light I know you're gonna go out and buy a new stove. I don't get blown off in the meantime You know I've been giving that telegram some serious thinking Enlisted about a dozen people. It could be from or about I thought of at least 30 I eliminated all of them except one Uncle Albert Uncle Albert, yep Well, why would Uncle Albert send us the telegram unless maybe finally got married? I didn't mean that Uncle Albert sent us the telegram But that is who the telegrams from if you remember that the last time he came to visit us That's all he talked about getting married. I meant that maybe the telegram is about I hope if he got married to marry a nice girl and not What did you say Eddie? I? Said maybe the telegram is about Uncle Albert Dear old uncle Linda. Let's face it when your time comes. It doesn't matter whether you're rich or poor Yeah, but he was such a sweet lovable dear and as what you said about him when he was here the last time What did I tell me to be nice to the old coot because he was loaded with money? I never said any such thing Eddie Sloan and don't you dare say where you implied as much That's a big laugh the very minute. I told you Uncle Albert was rather wealthy you count out to him as if he were a Sultan Me interested in his money who rolled a carpet out on the front side will let carpet happen to need airing on the day he arrives Who slipped pillows on the seats of the chairs every time he sat down so I'm courteous, so I'm a good host I always slip pillows on the seats for our guest Never put the pillow on a seat when I sit down. Some people need pillows and some don't Well, that's what I call coming right out and saying what you think Edward Oh honey, I was only making a joke 330 in the morning making jokes at my expense. What else is there about me you'd like to criticize? How about the clothes I wear? How about my hair? How about my cooking? How about the way I iron your shirt? Linda, please go ahead make some more jokes Look if you're gonna be so sensitive about every little thing I say I'm just not going to say anything to you when there's from now on Eddie Sloan You can talk to yourself or to the walls or find someone else to listen to your nasty remark Okay, okay, if you're gonna be so sensitive, maybe I'm looking right now. Okay. Okay. I will now right now Goodbye Linda. I'm wiped by God What's the matter? You want me to get arrested? What? Let me walk down the street and only my pajamas that's in decent exposure. Oh, Ed. You're crying out loud I guess it is pretty funny. Oh, at least you had your slippers on Pour yourself another cup of coffee. It's been chilly out there. It was. On any time of night for somebody to come visit me Maybe it isn't a visitor. You think I would call police? I don't know. It's 3.30 in the morning. Look Linda, if it was somebody who was trying to burglarize us This would be the smart way of doing it. What do you mean? Knock on the door, make him think you're a friend, walk right in Save the wear and tear of trying to break you I never thought of that Hmm, neither did I Until right now The ability to talk on and on endlessly Was long thought to belong to women exclusively However, throughout our national history Certain senators in Congress have latched onto this ability As though they had invented it Done in the Senate, it is called unlimited debate Or filibuster And there have been times when some senators have filibustered a bill to death On occasion, just the threat of a filibuster would kill a bill Critics of the filibuster argue that in a democratic country A minority has no right to prevent action by a majority And one senator could keep the entire Senate from important work As long as he just kept talking Defenders of unlimited debate, however Argue that this talking marathon is protection against a minority Being steamrollered by a hasty majority In 1959, a change in rules was proposed and passed Limiting debate to one hour per senator By the affirmative vote of two-thirds of the senators present on the floor Some senators believe that this change resolves the filibuster controversy While others insist the argument is far from dead But the final settlement can only be made by them The men you elect to the Senate of the United States Your representatives, those who speak for you The voice of your government The shade down on the back door window I think I can peek under the shade and see who it is All right, be careful It's Mr. Becker, our next door neighbor Hi, Mr. Becker Anything wrong? I happened to wake up, saw the light on in your kitchen I wonder if there's anything wrong Anyone sick? No, no, no Linda and I couldn't sleep, so we just came down to the kitchen and have a cup of coffee Are you sure there's nothing wrong? I'll do this How about a cup of coffee? Not to mention it, I guess I could go for a cup of coffee Well, come on in Thanks Hello, Mrs. Slough Oh, Mr. Becker I happened to wake up, saw the light on here in your kitchen But maybe something was... Hey, don't I smell bad? You sure do It's escaping from the pilot light on the stove Something's wrong, I won't stay lit Won't you get fixed? That's a good question, did you hear it? Never mind You folks do enough at this hour I just can't sleep Got insomnia Get a very often? No Oh, you're lucky I used to know a fellow who had insomnia Black? No, his name is Collins, he lives in Bridgeport No, no, I meant that you want your coffee black Oh, sorry No, no, one blob of cream, one teaspoon of sugar level Yeah, right Well, this fellow Collins didn't sleep a wink for weeks Is that right? I don't know much about your age, Mr. Stone Had a nice family, wife, two little children Oh, had a good job, everything was going real well Well, everybody in the neighborhood liked him Oh, it's a pathetic case, all right What happened? Well, I moved away, I never did find out Here's your coffee The reason we can't sweet Mr. Becker Is because we got a notice, we got a telegram We don't know what's in it The notice was delivered to us last night While we were in a movie We called the telegraph office But it closes after midnight Ooh, actually good coffee Well, I never know about telegrams Ten little words can change your whole life I know a fellow back in Bridgeport, Connecticut He worked for one of the leading electrical supply companies For eight years, eight years One night out of a clear blue sky They sent him a telegram that he was no longer needed Boy, you know about that Gee, that's an awful thing to do That's awful No, no, no, I'm wrong about that He wasn't fired? He was with the company nine years Well, I guess I better get back over to the house And get to bed Oh, that was mighty delicious coffee Good night Yeah, good night, Mr. Well Four o'clock, Eddie, let's get back up to bed Linda Linda There's something I think I ought to tell you What is it? Yesterday afternoon I had a chat with Mr. Downey At the office A chat? Well, it wasn't exactly a chat It was more of a discussion A discussion? Well, maybe it was an exchange of words You mean an argument? Yeah, I said I could Well, why didn't you tell? I didn't want to worry you Then that telegram is from your boss It is bad news You're getting fired You'll find out how you're going to call your boss When? Right now At this hour, don't be rude Wait a minute, Linda, you'll be sensible about this I'm half out of my mind worrying about that telegram And you get on that phone, Eddie Slone, and call Mr. Downey Well, not... Who can answer you? Go over and open the door Just thought of something Oh, Mr. Becker, it's Mr. Becker What is it? I got a thought, pretty good when I'm saying it What is it? What was your thought, Mr. Becker? I think I found a way you can get hold of that telegram The telegraph office was closed I know, but there's bound to be someone around the place Janitor, night watchman The office is only ten blocks away from here Get there in five minutes Linda? We never thought of that Five minutes, hop in your car and be over there in five minutes Linda? That's the car Mind if I ride along with you folks? Not at all It was my idea There's the telegraph office, Eddie Pull right up in front It's kind of chilly on the table Maybe we should have worn our clothes instead of our pajamas Oh, I forgot my glasses Any lights on in the office? Uh, yeah There's one on in the back room Good, that must be the janitor, the night watchman Knock on the door, Eddie Yeah, right Anybody coming? No I guess they can't hear us I'll tell you what I'll do, I'll go round in back and knock You folks stay right here in front All right Knock again Yeah, all right If there's somebody back there, they must be deaf Try jiggling the door Jiggling the door? Yeah Take the door knob and jiggle it Oh, oh, oh I'll make them hear me if it's the last thing I ever do Eddie What? Stop jiggling Why? Oh Hi, officer Nice morning Is it? We... We, uh... Uh, we're just Trying to get into the telegraph office Officer? Mm-hmm You were having a little trouble because the door is locked Mm-hmm You want to try it, officer? Maybe you can jiggle it open for us No, thanks Jack? Yeah That's the old guy that was trying to break in in the rear Good, I got the two in front Let's take him down to the station One of them is a mall Oh, Russ I thought we would never get home That desk sergeant turned out to be a pretty nice guy after all Oh, sure It only took us three hours to convince him we weren't the pajama bandits Do you realize we've been up all night, Eddie? Sure, right now I'm so sleepy What about the telegram? Don't answer it It's liable to be Mr. Beckett I doubt it He never comes out in this daylight I'll get it Telegram for Mr. and Mrs. E. Sloan I'll take it Sign here There you are Thanks Linda! The telegram has changed Quick Oh, would you have to open it up if you understand? Here, you do it, I'm too nervous Well, well, well Who's it from? Come on Come on, what does it say? Linda What are you laughing at? What is it? Come on, come on Linda Well, well Who's it from? Who's it from? Linda From the gas company The gas company? Yes Listen to this Dear Mr. and Mrs. Sloan Following Mrs. Sloan Urgent telephone call to our office this Friday afternoon at 4.30 p.m. We immediately dispatch an emergency repairman to your home Upon arrival he found no one at the house Upon receiving this telegram Please contact our office And we will have the matter taken care of immediately Signed by the gas company How about that? Well, oh my I guess I owe you an apology, darling You called the gas company, you did remember Well, sort of, I guess No, I would have to buy a new stove Do you want to call the gas company right now and have the repairman come on? Oh, not now, Linda, we're too sleepy Come on, let's go to bed I'll call them Monday morning from the office From the office? Yeah, if I don't forget The telegram starring Kathy and Elliot Lewis on stage Kathy and Elliot Lewis on stage Kathy Lewis, Elliot Lewis Two of the most distinguished names in radio appearing each week in their own theater starring in a repertory of franchise stories of their own and your choosing Radio's foremost players in Radio's foremost play