 Rolling, rolling, rolling. Hello, welcome to Solioid Mirror. I'm your hostess, Betty St. Lavaux. On this show, we talk about movies, film definitions, film histories, and then we go straight and talk about film. Today, I'm not going to do any film definitions or birthdays. What I am going to do is discuss four trailers that I've seen repeatedly via my YouTube searchings of great movies and my new love of UFC MMA. OK, so these movies, they have release dates that are anywhere between tomorrow and the end of the year. And I think that they're scandals. And I don't think that any of us should go see them, except for maybe one of them. So I have a beef and one of my director of my show today. Trailers are always, they blow the plot. They always put the beginning and end of the movie. Why go see the movie? And some trailers are better than some of the movies. For instance, the Watchman trailer, which was the most excellent trailer I'd probably ever seen in my life. It's also a great comic book, excellent, excellent novel. The trailer, unfortunately, was better than the movie. So sometimes trailers can be our warning signals too. However, some of these trailers, I'm going to say it right now, some of the people who greenlit these movies are going to go to hell and the maggots are going to eat their eyes out because I don't call this entertainment. So let's get started. Number one, welcome to Marwyn. I think that's what it's called. Welcome to Marwyn. This is supposedly a comedy drama fantasy. It's about a man. He's an artist who is almost beat to death. And then he becomes the village idiot. And he creates dolls that protects him from the bad people who hurt him. Now, number one, this is lifetime for men. Number two, there's nothing funny about getting a beat down, believe me. And my recent four-way into combat sports, please. This isn't even an entertainment. But what I do know is that I think I do have a sense of cynical marketing men. And they're going to think that Steve Carell's going to get an Oscar for being in this movie that's very serious and all about how the underdog wins out men. OK, so excuse me one moment. My little crush, Chail Sonnen, he told a heckler, Hollywood has taught you to not be proud. Hollywood has taught you to take the beat down. And so sometimes I think this is true with some of these movies that are disguised as entertainment. So Robert Zemeckis, who directed, want to say, Forrest Gump, directed this movie. It has Steve Carell, Leslie Mann, who's Jude Aptale's wife. Diane Kruger, who is literally the best dressed woman in Hollywood. She never makes a mistake. I love her fashion sense. Merritt Weaver, Janelle Monet, Eliza Gonzalez, Gwendolyn. She is, I'm sorry I got your last name wrong, Gwendolyn. Leslie Zemeckis, the director's wife, and Neil Jordan. So anyway, when I saw the trailer, I saw the violence, which I'm romantic. I didn't like it. But if that's the basis and the premise for the plot, don't run it tonight. The release date is the solstice of December 21st. I wouldn't recommend seeing it. And it's also distributed by Universal Pictures, my favorite studio. OK, so I understand that Mr. Carell is a comic and a comedian. And he's probably pushing for some Oscar, but this isn't the way to do it. Bless your heart. All right. So my next movie trailer is a movie that I would like to go see very much. It's the only one on the list. And it is Mary Queen of Scots. And it's based on John Guy's biography, My Heart is My Own, The Life of Mary Queen of Scots. Was directed by Josie Rourke, produced by Tim Barron, I think, Eric Fellner, and Deborah Hayward. The screen plays by Bo Williams. And it is also distributed by Focus Features and Universal Pictures. OK, so this movie serves Therese Ronan and Margot Robbie. Therese Ronan plays Mary Queen of Scots. Margot Robbie plays Elizabeth. We've got Jack London as Lord Darnley. David Tennant as John Knox. Joe Alwyn. Martin Culpston as the Earl of Bothwell. Brendan Loyal and Guy Pierce, who I adore playing William Cecil. Queen Elizabeth's the first right-hand man. OK, so number one, the moment that I saw Elizabeth and Mary talking in the trailer, you know that you cannot take this movie seriously. They never met in real life. OK, number one. Number two, by the time both of them croaked, they were, for that time period, well advanced in years. And they were not beautiful young women, unfortunately. OK, so expect a movie. Number three, with a lot of lines to the tune of, why should a woman rule? Or, my lord is arriving tonight with tidings. Prithee, get me a fan. OK, you're going to see a lot of that, all right? But the costumes are going to be fantastic. I like that Margot Robbie. I've only seen one movie of hers, and that was Suicide Squad. And I did that movie. We talked about it on the show the past few months. And I really like the fact that she's playing a historical heavy. Whenever I see any actress play a historical role, I know that they have made it in Hollywood. That's just my opinion, but I think it's true. All right, the downside with a movie like this is that it's been done to death. Three Musketeers, Jane Eyre, and A Star is Born, anyone. We've seen this movie done so many times, but now we're going to see a 21st century rendition done with some style and grace. So I would check that out. I think I'm going to take one of my curtsy aunts go see that. OK, so that one is definitely a go. My next one I want to discuss is the Unfortunate Peppermint, which stars Jennifer Garner. I hope I have the list for that one. Well, basically, it stars Jennifer Garner. And I really like her. She had a TV show for years called Alias. She had that great fight scene with Ben Affleck in Daredevil, which was the best part of a horrible movie. I love her action stick. And in Hollywood, if you've done it once before, they want to see you do it again. So she plays a kick-ass person. Unfortunately, the movie is based on the Unfortunate Premise that because her family croaks in front of her and the guys got off, now she's going to kick some ass. Now, that's not entertainment. OK, I'm sorry. It's like, is this the reason why a mom takes up the gun because her family's already croaked, all right? That's not OK. At least even in the Long Kiss Good Night, we got to see Agal Gina there, Agal from Dumb and Louise there. She was a spy. She had had amnesia. Her family survived, all right? So I really enjoy that premise. But this movie appears to be a mixture of death wish, Long Kiss Good Night, The Punisher, and Double Jeopardy. And the unfortunate thing about the revenge cliche and vigilante cliche in movies is that it's been done literally to death. So I'm so glad to see Jennifer Garner on the big screen again. But I wish it wasn't something horrible and tragic. And sorry, the guys who look like the Kilda family, they look brown. It's just not good. I mean, yeah, not like I'm going to go see White Call of Crime movie anyway. But it's not all right. So at any rate, this was directed by Pierre Morrell. I think his first name's Pierre. I was writing so quickly. The screenplays by Chad St. John. It's produced by Gary Lucia, Tom Rosenberg, Richard S. Wright, and served by Lakeshore Entertainment. Here's the cast list. Tyson Ritter, John Gallagher, John Ortiz, Method Man, Richard Cabell, Kyla Drew, Carly Fleming, Chris Johnson, Pell James, Juan Pablo Roba, and Anne Ilonze. All right. So nice to see you again, Ms. Garner. I really don't like the plot. All right. So our last movie is going to be one that I briefly hit upon on my list. And it is the remake of A Star Is Born, Written, Produced, and Directed by Bradley Cooper. Written, Produced, and Directed by Bradley. OK. So I love the fact, and I'm jealous of the fact that he's able to be the writer, the producer, and director after a long list of people who have passed on this 100th remake. And it was in development hell for about seven or eight years. So Clint Eastwood, Beyonce, Leo DeCaprio, Will Smith, Tom Cruz, Ray Leata, you name it. Everybody was going to be on board for this remake at one point or another in the last 10 years, OK? The current cast is Bradley Cooper, Lady Gaga, Andrew Dice Clay, playing Lady Gaga's dad, Dave Chappelle, Sam Elliott, Rebecca Field, and Michael Haney. All right. So the screenplay was also written by Eric Roth and Will Fettis. Distributed by Warner Brothers and Metro Golden Mayor, release date is tomorrow. It will be shown, I think, at the Venice Film Festival. I can't remember if it's a Venice Film Festival in California or the Venice Film Festival in Italy, but I think it's going to be in Italy. So at any rate, the original screenplay was written by Robert Carson, Dorothy Parker, and Alan Campbell. And Dorothy Parker was one of the legendary Algonquin Round Table back in the day with a whole bunch of cronies. They'd sit at Algonquin Hotel and eat and talk. And I believe William Wellman directed the 1937 version, which is near and dear to my heart with Janet Gaynor and William March. All right, the pleasant plot, I haven't seen the trailer. The pleasant plot consists of this. Bradley Cooper is a downhill country singer. And I'll give kudos to who they gave the country music to. Mr. Lucas Nelson, Willie Nelson's son, they gave the soundtrack to. And Lady Gaga is a rising star on her way up. Now, the original premise of A Story is Born, it's about Hollywood people, it's about movie stars. But the last three remakes, it's always about singers, which a lot of singers can't act, OK? And Chris Christophson, he's all sexy or whatever, but he was in that remake of Star is Born with Boris Dyson, and people say that he was loaded most of the time. The script was really bad. Matter of fact, John Peters, Barbara Streisand's boyfriend at the time, was producer of the movie. He's also producing duties on this movie, too. OK, so Chris Christophson, he can act with paper bag, and he also did a bad job in Blade. So I'm more into models testing out the acting waters than I am singers, OK? So the fact that Lady Gaga's in this, I know she has lots of plans. Bless her heart, it's just not my generation. It's not my shtick. I would rather see movie stars. Singers are good for singers. Actors are good for actors. But the next remake, I would really like to see a broke down actor on his way out, checking out the character actress who's been around for a minute and needs a big break. That would be a great departure from the usual stayed worn out songbird shtick. OK, so I think that that's it for me today. I'm your hostess, Betty St. Leveau. I hope you've enjoyed this edition of Celluloid Mirror. I'd like to thank my crew here at Orca and Gender and Building for its continued support. St. Leveau Consultations, a lemonade company for taking the day off. And all of the YouTube professors I've picked up in the past few months, such as Alpaca the Sorus, the Weasel, and MMA on point for kind of helping me listen to not saying um all the time, and also Mr. Chail Sonnen, but not at least my mom, my first film professor, Sharon Orfield Ardella Paris-Ochizaniaklerich for teaching me how to articulate and appreciate the silver screen. Until next week, children, stay away from those bad movie trailers. Ciao.