 Okay, the question is that discernment question of the difference between the voice of for fear and the voice of love Initially I used I Used feelings I remember one time I was working through the course and Jesus said you know the one right use of judgment is how do you feel and I thought I I need to pay very close attention to that Because when I looked at the life of David, I said David's into intellectualism into denial repression and Though David feels some things David they spent an entire life at not feeling and now the course is saying You know the one right use of judgment is how do you feel? so the first problem was Okay, very good, but I don't feel I wish I could feel More intensely and more subtly and more be more sensitized to those feelings Because that's it like a barometer. I'd like a little touchstone of getting what's underneath so um, I started going through a process of Again with the preferences it was like Saying to Jesus how it's how am I going to feel now that I've spent decades at not feeling and Jesus just said well, we're going to use some of those things that you love the most about this world music so I was taken by Jesus to Get all this to go to the library go to different shops get this music and The emotions would just start to well up in me tears would start to come and I would listen to sort of music and Then after that long phase of working with the music Also, my dog chipper when I was younger Was like an unconditional loving Symbol I could pour out all the emotions So I think I saved thousands of years Working with this dog. It would lick my tears The tears would come out and it would just be this little pink tongue Licking them and licking them. That was another huge way of getting in touch with emotions And then the movies I would have Jesus take me to the movies Not the movies that David would pick these were far from it I mean, I remember being guided to blockbuster videos sometimes and I would just say, okay I'm here only to be truly helpful. I'm here to heal guide me to the movie that would be best for me and I would go You've got to be kidding I Am not going to watch this violent movie or I am not going to watch this sad depressing movie No, I'm not going to watch another war story These war stories, you know the persona of David had very strong preferences in terms of movies as well as music and the guidance came in was a way of washing away and bringing up those emotions so that I could start to feel and I remember The other thing about David is not only was David shy But this shyness carried over into relationships David didn't go on his first date until He was 27 years old That's a bit extreme But there again that was David so I remember when I came across the course and was working with the course and it was in a relationship at 28 years old basically What I found was there was these intense emotions That had been pushed down out of awareness that were coming up now in the context of the relationship very intense I had graduate school and this relationship and Teaching assistantship going on at the same time and the combination of those three was like brought up an enormous amount of emotions and then I Would say that those were a Key block in being able to discern the spirit versus the ego That repression and denial was like just buffered me from being able to really tell the difference I wasn't sensitized So that process at some point I remember saying I can't see how people even function In this world with emotions this intense. They felt debilitating they felt like I felt like I was completely dysfunctional as a human being with the intensity I don't like I allowed myself to feel and it turned on a waterfall appears And I thought oh my god, I'm not gonna be able to turn this waterfall off I've unleashed this crying man and After all those years of being the stoic Man that doesn't cry the boy that doesn't cry I've turned on this giant waterfall and then That all turned out to be really important because I became much more sensitized to My feelings and when I wasn't in alignment with the stock systems So then when I was working with the course I also would hear things like from Jesus. The Holy Spirit never commands and never demands And I started to realize that there was a voice in my mind that was doing a lot of commanding and A lot of demanding it was quite stern It was quite serious Actually was pushy Very pushy and and I started to really feel like this is not the Holy Spirit The Holy Spirit never commands never demands most like these gentle suggestions Gentle like offering a plate of suggestions to me every day The Spirit was very soft and That's started my journey of starting to know the difference Because the ego is quite clever and it does disguise itself and it can even use affirmations and It can even quote the course You know it quotes scripture and If it had a face it would be smiling and kind of snickering like This works every time Get them with the Affirmations and vanity. I'm thinking that they're a spiritual person For holding on to these spiritual affirmations. It really was another trick So it's taking I would say a lot of fine-tuning over the years But it started off with me starting to really allow myself to feel Because without that I don't think The discernment could have unfolded at the speed Which it did it does remind me when I go down to South America because a lot of the women down there are so open-hearted It is there's just you could feel their hearts immediately and they pour out everything And then they seem to have a lot of partners and husbands that are already like the macho it's very like the bravado thing and that kind of macho bravado thing and trying to To stuff feelings down is one of the best ways that at locking your spiritual awakening It just shuts it off, you know, just really it's almost like a device. It's then keeps the unconscious mind buried and That's that is one of those questions of you could we could spend Easily the rest of the week just and we probably will with Gary's sessions in my sessions There'll be no pointers that will come in Increasing that discernment