 Welcome to Ignite the Spark. My name is Shar Spect-Pakniak. I am the founder and CEO of a program called Horizons for Girls, where we ignite the spark in our students. We mentor middle school and high school girls throughout Sheboygan County, and we really work with them, trying to help them succeed working towards that high school diploma and then beyond, and of course the key to that is being able to ignite a spark, find that something inside of each student that's gonna help them be successful in life. I'm excited about my guests today because my guest is somebody from a ways back. We won't get into how many years, we won't talk about any of that, we'll just say that we've known each other for quite some time. Jamie, because you're in a new position with new company, et cetera, I'm gonna let you explain exactly more about who you are and who you're with and what you do. Okay, well I am on the board of directors for Worko, which is the Wisconsin Recovery Community Organization. We are a non-profit organization that was started in Madison in 2011 and in 2016, a group of local people in Sheboygan brought it to Sheboygan and later, or shortly thereafter, the headquarters became in Sheboygan. With that, a recovery community organization does advocacy for those in recovery and also offers a network of support for those who are suffering from addiction as well as their friends and family. We run two meetings. One is a family's anonymous meeting where family members of those who suffer from addiction can come and feel support from other people who have similar circumstances and there's no stigma involved in that because everybody is pretty much going through the same things or similar things. That meets at the Lakeshore Community House Center every other Tuesday on the first and third Tuesday of the month at 7 p.m. And then we also offer an all-recovery meeting that is held every Thursday at the Lakeshore Community House Center at 7 p.m. And that is open to people in recovery and their friends and family as well. They can bring them with and everybody can feel support. It's just a place to be amongst those who are going through the same things as you are and to help them find ways to keep their recovery going and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Okay, now when you talk about recovery, recovery from addiction to pretty broad any kind of drugs. Correct, we help people with all forms of addiction whether it be alcohol or drug related. We also have what is called an ED to recovery program. We offer recovery coaching services for those who are trying to go from addiction into recovery. They help set goals for the people and learn how to navigate through their recovery. They're not counselors or clinicians of any sort, but they're just a resource for those people because when you're in recovery or trying to get into recovery, it's a very overwhelming thing and a lot of people don't know where to get help. So we show them what their options are and help them to figure out what the best fit for them in their recovery is, whether they choose to do an inpatient program or an IOP, which is an intensive outpatient program. Let them know where all the area meetings are because there's also meetings run every night of the week by other organizations and we work with those other organizations and basically what we are is a resource for people to help them find ways to be in recovery. Okay, well, I know you and I, you reached out to me and I know that I see it very often when I'm working with my students, they are experiencing the trauma of that kind of behavior, again, whether it's drugs or alcohol. And I look at not many, but some of my students were, it's multi-generational where it's not just their parents, but even their grandparents maybe that have been living with, let's say, alcoholism. And it seems like it's, they almost look at it and say, well, this is the way life is. They accept it and they say, huh, this is the norm. And it's like, no, it's not the norm. And trying to make the students understand that there is another way, another path to go. Well, you've asked me to come and speak to those students and my passion for this is based off of the fact that I was the child of an addict. My biological father died of a drug overdose three years ago and he suffered from addiction from the time he was a teenager until he passed away at 61. 30 years, he wasn't in my life. The last time I saw him, I was eight years old. So I know what those kids go through and I know what it feels like to have a parent like that. And I also know that there's one of two ways that you can go about things. You can either repeat the cycle of addiction and it is extremely hereditary. So those kids are at a higher risk of becoming addicts because there's learned behavior and there's also genetics involved in it. But I always tell people when I speak that you have the opportunity to stop the cycle of dysfunction anytime you choose to. You choose your path. So they need to know that there is hope and they don't have to go down that route and your program offers them help to see that. So I think that's really amazing and I'm really looking forward to speaking with them and giving them more of my background and an understanding that there are people out there like them that understand how they feel. Well, I think very often when I'm talking to these students, it's almost like they blame themselves sometimes. It's my fault that this is what's happening in my family and it's like, no, it's not. You're not the one that's causing that to happen. And it's, you know, there is a way to step, not out of, but away from some of that behavior. And that concerns me because obviously I'm always concerned about the safety of our students and making sure they're safe. I mean, there's more than once I've had to pick up a student from home and drop them off at a relative because of what was happening in a family situation. And they need to feel safe. I mean, they're growing. They're babes in the woods yet. My memories of my biological father when he was in my life were the same feelings of, you know, this is my fault or why doesn't he love me when he didn't show up to pick me up? And when he did show up to pick me up, there were situations like you're talking about and you internalize that. And it's hard not to feel any differently. And that's part of why I speak to groups. I've spoken at high schools and health class and I let them know that it's not their fault. They didn't do anything. It doesn't mean your parent didn't love you. Addiction is a disease. It may start out as a choice the first several times, especially when it comes to drugs. But after that, it hijacks your brain, changes its chemistry and you're not really able to make right and rational decisions. And when they're having those circumstances at home, they do blame themselves for maybe if I would have done this, my parent wouldn't have done that, you know? But they need to know that it's not their fault. They need safe places to go like you offer and other services that help them realize that they don't have to travel down that same path. Yeah, I mean, I don't know how many times I've heard, overheard probably more often students talking about that they're walking on eggshells. I mean, they're so worried about setting it off, setting the fireworks off at home. And it's like, wow, that's such a scary atmosphere to be trying to be a kid in. I mean, you've got a lot of stuff as a kid that you want to be able to do and have fun and go to prom and football games and unfortunately study for exams and to have to worry about walking on eggshells because of what might happen to blow up at home. That's pretty scary. It is pretty scary. And I had been in those situations myself when my biological father would pick me up. You walked on eggshells because he was a pretty abusive man and verbally and physically, you didn't want to upset him because you didn't know what was going to happen. So being there and it was never fun. And I understand how they feel about that. And again, that's why I speak to groups when I can to let them know that they're not alone. Yeah, it's, again, I'm thinking of students, one of the students asking me, how long have you guys lived at, such and such address? And I said, well, we've lived there for 30 plus years. And the student goes, oh, how boring. And I said, no, it's not. It's a comfortable place to be to know that you're in the same house. That particular student over the time that I've known that student has lived in five different addresses. And most of the time has had to move because of evictions, which again, a lot of that abuse of alcohol and drugs is leading maybe to jobs being lost, bills not being paid, rent not being paid, utilities not being paid. And again, when I'm talking to teachers and they can't understand why an assignment didn't get turned in. And I'm trying to explain, well, yes, they do need to do that assignment, but guess what, their utilities were shut off last week and they don't have water or gas or lights. So the last thing on their to-do list is probably their homework. And that's unfortunate. Well, and even if they are able to do their homework, how well are they doing it? That when their mind is not clearly focused on that because of those circumstances. And we run into people that are in those circumstances all the time. I've dealt with kids who have been in those circumstances. With the recovery coaching program, as I spoke of a little bit before, we have a group of amazing recovery coaches. I'm a trained recovery coach myself. We also offer training for recovery coaches. We hold recovery coach academies every so often and train new people. And with the recovery coaching, we have a group of us that volunteer to coach others because unfortunately right now in Wisconsin, that's not something insurance covers. In many other states, it is. It's very, very, very popular on the East Coast. And with the ED2 recovery program, we received a large grant and it kicked off back in December of this past year where we're actually in the hospitals, in both hospitals in Manitowoc and then right now in Aurora in Sheboygan. And when an overdose patient is brought into the hospital, a recovery coach who's on call is called in and offers recovery coach services to that person. So that they can understand that you know, we obviously know the situation that they're in. They overdosed, they could have died. They almost did die. You know, a lot of them have to be narcanned to be brought back because of the overdose. And we explain to them, you know, what we do and how we can help them. And part of what a recovery coach does is because most of these people have lost their jobs, they have lost their homes, they've lost their driver's license. A lot of them have lost belongings because they couldn't get everything out of the house by the, you know, when they were evicted by the time it was, you know, to have everything out of the house. That's part of what we help them with. You know, we sit there and say, okay, what are the circumstances of your life? You know, obviously this isn't where you wanna be. Where would you like to be? And how do we get there? So then we set the goals. And for a lot of them it is the first goal is obviously to find a job. So, you know, we help them with services that help them find a job. Then the next goal would be finding somewhere else to live which can be difficult, especially when they have evictions on their record because a lot of people don't want to run to them. Then next is obviously a lot of them have to get their license back and go from there. So it's basically helping them navigate through rebuilding their life and going from addiction into recovery and maintaining that because once you've been in addiction and you become a person in recovery, you're still always going to have that where it's a struggle every single day and that's a choice you have to make every single day is to stay on the right path and make the right decisions so you don't end up back where you were. And that's part of having a coach there that you can talk to about these things and help you understand how to stay on the right track to keep yourself in recovery. Yeah, because my feeling is, as you're saying, it's an ongoing journey. It's not something that you flip a switch and say, oh, I'm all better, I'm all fixed. It happens for, it's there, that temptation is there forever. It will be a lifelong journey and a choice they have to make every single day when they wake up. Part of what we talk to them about is triggers, how to avoid triggers. Don't drive past your favorite old bar that you used to hang out at. Unfortunately, you have to cut certain people out of your life if they're still actively using because in order for you to maintain your recovery, putting yourself in a position to be around others who are not living the same way, you run the risks of having relapse or going back to old habits. So we talk about triggers and downtime and instead of sitting and thinking about things that may make you feel like using what can you do to avoid that? Is there hobbies you like or is there something you've always wanted to do as a hobby? Volunteering as well and telling your story to inspire others, letting them know where you come from and how you got to where you are and helping others as well. So that's part of it. It's definitely got to be a challenge to constantly, I mean, I'm thinking triggers and how quickly you could slip back into that old behavior. Definitely got to be a challenge to work with. Now, as we were setting up for the show, you were talking about a balloon release that you did recently. What was that about? I hosted an event through the Wisconsin Recovery Community Organization. I was the chairman of the event. I put it together in September for National Overdose Awareness Day. We hosted it down at the community center at the lakefront across from the YMCA and we had speakers come in that told their story and then our president opened the evening with talking about our organization and what we do. Then the speakers came in and told their story. I had the gentleman who runs Samaritan Hand come in and give the closing prayer after he told his story. And then we released LED balloons. People were able to buy a balloon which the donation went to help those in recovery and they were able to buy a balloon for someone that they lost from an overdose. And then we released the balloons after and that was a really neat thing to see all these lighted balloons and the air representing people who lost their battle and knowing that that's why we're there so we can save lives and other people don't lose their battle. But, and I, you know, I guess I look at how young that addiction is even impacting students. I mean, I'm looking at students in middle school, you know, fifth grade, sixth grade and alcohol and how it ends up, I mean, at that early age, they start and then it becomes that habit that's part of life. You know, if I'm gonna go to school today, I'm gonna have a drink before I go to school and it's like, whoa, wait, no, time holds. That is a huge thing. That's also something when I have spoken to health classes that I talk about because I know the majority of high school students drink at some point during high school. They end up at parties and everybody else is doing it so they do it too. I know what I did when I was in high school, you know. And I tell them that when you're drinking, you know, some of them will say well, I would never use trucks but when you're already intoxicated and somebody pulls out drugs, why not? Why not? You know, you're gonna make bad decisions and it happens and it doesn't take long before you're addicted to it and that's how a lot of these kids do get addicted to heroin or other substances at an early age is because they were probably at a party like that and maybe had been drinking already and it was easy to make a bad decision at that point and that's where it starts. And how many times are they going to the medicine cabinet maybe and pulling out something that is supposed to be mom or dads and they're going, well, hey, that's there and it's a prescription so it's okay to take and it's like, uh-uh, no, it's not. If it's not your prescription, don't help yourself. That's a scary thing because, you know, there was all those parties in the news not that long ago where kids would all bring prescriptions from home and they would do that and they don't see anything wrong with it because they are prescriptions. So they don't think, you know, it's- It's gotta be okay. It's gotta be okay because it was prescribed, it's legal, you know, but it wasn't prescribed to them. That's another way that people get addicted, especially to opiates. Now, if somebody's interested in maybe having you speak to a class or a group or maybe they're interested in getting involved and volunteering somehow, how do they get a hold of you? What do they need to do? Well, they can contact us by one of two ways. We do have a Facebook page that is, you know, the Worko Sheboygan page and they can send us a message on there. I do receive those messages as well as a couple other people. They go to all of us and it's usually whoever answers it first but if they're specifically looking for myself to speak, they can mention that and I will be able to get a hold of them that way. And we also have a website which is www.worko.org that they can email us through the website as well. Okay, so now you were saying that the state office is now in Sheboygan? Correct, the headquarters moved here shortly after we joined in 2016. Okay, okay. So what a great resource that I knew nothing about until you and I had coffee a couple of weeks ago. And I went, wow, that's right here in Sheboygan. So to me, that's awesome. And to be able to connect with people that maybe have gone on the same journey that you're on right now, that to me is extremely important. You know, when I'm talking to students, whenever they can connect with somebody that's been there, that means much more than an expert coming in and saying, this is what you need to do to fix your life. If you're able to instead hear a message from someone that says, hey, I've been there. I struggled with that. I understand what you're going through. That's much, much more powerful. When I speak and when I've spoken in the health classes, I generally open and give a description of work on what we do and then talk to them a little bit about drugs and like I explained when you're at a party and that kind of thing. And then after, and then I tell my story, I've been affected by addiction not only by my biological father, but I've had friends and a loved one that suffers from addiction. And I've had friends who've passed away from overdoses, from addiction. So then after I'm done speaking, I always bring somebody in who has lived experience and they tell their story. So they see what happens to you if you go down that road. Okay, now I wanna remind our viewers that that's a great opportunity to volunteer. But another great opportunity to volunteer would be if you wanted to get involved with Horizons for Girls. We're always looking for mentors that maybe wanna work with the students. We're looking for speakers that might wanna come in and share something with the students. What's exciting for us is the summer season is coming up and we are going to be working at the Elkhart Lake Triathlon. And so we're gonna be looking for teams of volunteers to help with that event, whether you want to be maybe as a family, staffing a water station along the way or you want to help with the transition of people when they're getting out of the water and out of their wetsuits and they're getting on their bike and riding off onto that next leg. I will wave as they go by but I am not participating. I'm not one to participate. But last year I'm told that event had over 800 participants in the event plus all of the spectators. So I know that we're gonna need lots of volunteers to help with that event. That's coming up the beginning of June. And the other later on in September, we will have our second annual 5K for fighting, bullying and that event is sponsored by Master Gallery. And I'm really excited about that event also. So that one also we're gonna be looking for volunteers as well as we're gonna be looking for people that would like to participate. It's non-competitive, you can run or you can walk, you can form teams from your school. And what we're going to do is the school that raises the most money will be able to earn a $200 grant to fight bullying at their school. So I think that's gonna be very exciting. So again, you can get involved in so many different ways. There's great resources out there, but definitely even if you are just in your day-to-day job, ignite the spark. Have a conversation with the youth, find out what they're up to, talk to them about what they're doing, have them be a part of your life, just connect with students. I wanna thank everybody for watching and listening and being a part of igniting the spark in Sheboygan. Thank you very much. Thank you.