 and welcome to Holistic Wellness Revealed. I'm Leticia Sharp and I'm happy today actually thrilled and excited to bring on our guest, Tavana McMor. We have some conversations that we're going to have with Tavana that aren't the normal fan fair. So with great pleasure, I invite Tavana. Welcome, Tavana. Hello. Thanks for having me. I'm super happy to have you here because, you know, it's funny. I was asking my daughter, I have a 16 year old and I said, you know, I have these questions and they're a little bit mixed here and there. And she said, mom, this isn't a fan kind of a thing. You need to ask him about healing. And I said, okay, sounds great to me because that's my jam. And it was right in line too with when I asked you about coming on the show. And you said, you know, I don't want to talk about it before. I just want to come and I said it's going to be real. It's going to be raw. And you said my favorite kind. So I'm real happy to. So let's start off with, first of all, I'd like to know what influences you with how you get your lyrics, how you find your vibe. Like how do you just show up? And is it the same playlist every time I know it isn't because I've seen you hundreds of times? But how does that translate to you when you show up every time to share your music with your listeners? Yeah, that's a really good question. I, you know, it's with influences for me, of course, you know, was raised on, you know, hundreds of musicians that I enjoy listening to. But for these days in my professional careers and musician, influences are based basically, interestingly enough, on my life and mostly the hard stuff, you know, like all the stuff that that makes life hard is the stuff that makes my job easier as a musician. And that's kind of a balance for me. I wouldn't be able to write the songs that I do unless I went through all of the really difficult stuff in my life, the breakups, the, the interpersonal relationship, hardships, all of those things make me run to the gig, run to write a song, they make those moments for me matter and make them all very cathartic. So, you know, I'm lucky in that way in where my livelihood is is connected to the way that I process the hard stuff in my life. That makes sense. It makes, it makes complete sense. And one of the questions that I wanted to ask you was how do you feel like you connect with your audience? Like, how do you feel like you have this connection with people? Because you're one person, you're not a whole band, you sound like a whole band when you perform. But you're one person and that must be, I don't know, just can you talk about that a little bit, like a process and how you do that connection? I mean, that part of it for me comes from a gratitude, I think, of, you know, coming from the place where I was playing for like nobody in bars for so many years. And now I have this, you know, it's not a gigantic following, but I mean, I have people that come and listen to me play no matter what it is. And I'm always just feel very grateful that they're there. And I, you know, see it as my, you know, responsibility and my, and my joy really to, to give them my, my, my whole self when I show up, you know, and it, and it's not like it's a one directional thing. It's definitely circular, you know, their energy helps me feel better after I play in place versus. So, you know, that's kind of, I think, where I usually am during those those times. I love that, that reciprocity. It's so important. And if you don't have that as, as a musician, if you don't have that as anyone of influence, then it kind of falls short, for sure. Yeah, I think you can, you know, I definitely had a, you know, time of my life and, you know, the early days were, you know, I found myself when I was playing like a lot of nothing but covers in, you know, in Waikiki or whatever in bars and playing for four hours and getting, you know, just sort of in that, you know, sort of flat line mindset staring at the sports center in the corner or whatever and forgetting that I'm even playing, you know, back then I remember, I remember taking notice of that, you know, you know, 10, however many years ago that was and, and realizing that that wasn't the place I wanted to be at, you know, and so once I started to write my own stuff and, you know, have the courage to play my own, my own stuff and kind of give the audience what I really would rather be doing and, you know, in a sense doing it for me started being me doing it for them more, you know, and in the sense that it was more authentic, you know, so it just, it goes over better, you know, that's what I believe in, you know. I absolutely love that you brought that up because I don't, I mean, I know that you're not alone and it's not just in music. I didn't even think it happened in music. I'm, you know, I do body work and I've been doing this for so many years and there was a time in, in my process and my journey where I would, I just, okay, I'm going to the feed, I'm going to the, and I would just go through the process and I was, I was feeling really unsatisfied within myself with how I was moving through that and I feel like what you're talking about is a sense of presence, right? Absolutely, that's exactly what it is. Yeah. And, you know, I'm a firm believer that when you can dial into that, no matter what you're doing, if it's music or body work or even if you're, you know, a carpenter or whatever, you know, there is a way to tap into presence and the now and, you know, I feel like you immediately can, can feel that as any human being can really feel that immediately, that difference between just kind of spacing out and thinking about your taxes or whatever while you're doing stuff or whatever versus really, really noticing your body inside of your body, what the muscles are doing, you know, how it feels and for me, like sonically listening deeply to what the song is doing and it makes it to where I may play the same song, you know, maybe six or seven times throughout a few weeks for the gigs that I do. But each time that I play it, it's a new journey for me because I'm going through that process. It's an adventure. I'm like, I don't know, what am I going to do here? How do I feel like singing this today? You know, and it really makes every time I do it a brand new experience, you know, and I think, I really think everybody can do that with whatever it is that they do, you know, yeah. I love, that's awesome. It's so such a great point. Because I've often thought too, it's like, gosh, does he get tired of playing the same song? You know what I mean? Are there any songs that you don't like to play? But then knowing you and talking to you, it's kind of like, if you felt that way, you just wouldn't play it. Yeah, absolutely. You know, there's been times where I have like a whole set list right now. And I'll totally go off of it, you know, because I feel like I don't want to play that right now. It's I'm not feeling and I'll just play what I want to play at that time. And it usually works for the audience, you know, also because I think what's happening there is I'm sort of reading. You know, I feel I also believe that in any given room, everyone's energy is influencing everybody else's energy. And so I think that that has to do with it too. So if I decide to go off the set list, it's probably for the better, because it's probably I'm reading the room in a sense, you know, and I think that's important, you know, especially for what I do. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Was there ever a point where, okay, so let's go back to, first of all, how do you find your way to presence? Like how do you find I know you said you listen to the this the music, but is there something that you say to yourself or something that like a mantra or anything like that? I mean, for me, I think I don't I don't really do anything to trigger it or have any anchor, I guess is what you mean. But like, music is sort of like, for me, like the most immediate way is for me anyway, to get into that space. And because it's just so powerful, it's not only visual to me, it's visual for me because I'm looking at my instrument, for instance, it's also auditory, you know, and it really is like a full body experience. So unless especially once I learn how to do that, it's been a practice of mine for so long that it's just something it's like the perfect way for me to drop in to the now. And I mean, I definitely I'm not great at doing it outside of music, you know, which is why I feel like if I don't play music for any extended amount of time, I start to feel like, you know, I feel a little anxiety inside and all these things start to pop up for me because I think that is exactly my practice that is my meditation, it is my practice of presence and those sorts of things. That's that's what it is for me, you know, and I haven't been able to say hold like a meditation practice for like regular times or even take my vitamins on time, but I can play music and it makes I feel like it makes me healthier for it, for sure, healthier mine at least. That brings up such a great point for people because so many times people are like, I just I have such a hard time meditating or I get off track and how do I get back on track and you just nailed it, you know, find what what feels good to you and do that. And when we that more, that's our meditation. So your your skill, I believe you're right, you know, there's I don't think there's one way to do anything. And if you can find something that works for you to get into the moment and into your body, you know, whatever that might might be some people that might be tennis or running or, you know, whatever, there's so many things that can bring us into that space. And I think rather than kind of banging your head against the wall, why can't I meditate? Why can't I do this? You know, it's like you there's something else that you like to do that you can do, you know, and I think it's very important, you know, to have something like that in your life that's that reoccurs, you know, keeps you back draws you back to center draws you back to center, because that's like, it's crazy. It's hard. It certainly helps to have something like that, you know. Exactly. Exactly. I mean, it brings me it reminds me of a teacher of mine who tells me to, you know, walk my meditation. And it feels like that's what you're doing. And even if you get off track, like, maybe you just walk back into your, you know, your wherever you go to do your music, and then you just pick up one of your instruments, right? And that's what brings you back. Absolutely. And even further than that, for me, it's like whenever life gets super duper hard, you know, like some of the harder stuff in life, you know, that we all deal with death in the family or heartbreak or anything like that. That's like those really big emotions. If it wasn't for being able to pick up my music and, and, and, you know, kind of process it through songwriting or performing, you know, songs that make me really feel that feeling. And, you know, it's for me anyway, it's just the best way I have to process that in a healthy way to where I'm not like, you know, trapping those emotions inside of me, and instead of being able to release them and, and, you know, kind of get them out there so that I'm not just feeling all like, you know, tight and bundled up inside, you know. So for me, that's exactly what that is. And if I didn't have it, I'd be in big trouble for sure. So I'm super grateful to be able to do it. So going back to like what you said in the beginning of our conversation was that that's where that's the magic happens, right? So that's sort of like alchemizing those big emotions and really finding a way to turn that lead into gold, so to speak. No, I mean, absolutely. I remember the first time I realized that too, you know, there's been a lot of time in my life where I think I would do it sort of subconsciously not realizing it was happening. But then I remember the moment when I realized that, hey, you see how you feel better right now and how much, how many big emotions you were feeling right before writing the song that you wrote about it. And then me being so focused on, on finishing this and then being able to finally play it in its entirety. And right after that, I remember like, whoa, I feel so much better right now, you know, because what I was feeling before was so intense that it was impossible for this time, at least for me to ignore what had just happened. And ever since I had done that, you know, all those years ago, I am quick to it now. And when the when the stuff comes up, the big stuff comes up, I'm like, I know what I need to do right now. I know exactly what I need to do. I know it's now it's an official tool in the belt, you know, yeah. I say maybe it's more than a tool. It's a skill. It's a skill that you practiced. And yeah, you are, you're really great at it. And I love being able to watch that process. Because sometimes I can see you just sort of feeling into the music and feeling into, and you'll kind of giggle at yourself, sometimes on stage, I see it, you're like, Okay, I guess I'm going there with that, you know, and I just love that. Just that authenticity that you have. And I feel like that's, that's what it comes from is by being able to be authentic with yourself in those hard moments and those hard times. And maybe that's the answer, right? Is that? Absolutely. I think that's a huge point. And that's one that I talk about a lot with other musicians and friends of mine. It's like, you know, we're all striving to get our music heard and this and that and the other thing. But I think at a certain point for me, I'd realize that the real, the real payback for all this is the way that this process for me, if done correctly, it actually is contagious in a way. Like it does help others that are out there listening and I get the feedback from people. And it is true. They come to the gigs and they might have had a really bad day, but they leave feeling better, you know, and it's same, same as I do, you know, so it's not like, I'm just going in there and hey, everybody look at me. This is like my shelf thing, whatever. It's like a really like, more of a meeting of everybody, you know, and we're all listening and, you know, we're all experiencing the music together and we all leave feeling better. And that is, you know, that's a really amazing thing to be able to do and for everybody to be able to do, you know, and so I think to to wrap up what you're saying, I think that is an important key to at least my job as a musician is to to kind of come from that authentic space. And when you do it properly, people feel that and they also are able to lock into what you're releasing in yourself. They get to release it in themselves as well, you know, I have such a big smile on my face right now because it really feels to me like what you're bringing up right now is this this difference between like, say, performance and exposure, right, because you're not just coming out and performing. You're coming out and you're being Tavana. You are totally exposed, whatever happens, happens. You're going to deal with it in a moment and you're going to love yourself through it. You know what I mean? And this doesn't just happen when you're an actual performer. This happens in everyday life. Is there are there other places in your life where you've been able to use that skill and a really good question. And that that is a real profound realization that that I had at some point as well as it does bleed over into your life. I think any form of art or I mean anything really that you kind of spend enough time to try to master will bleed over into your other part of your life. For instance, you know, early days, really early days, it's was really common for me to be incredibly nervous. For instance, to get on stage. I used to like, I remember like closing my eyes for like in my entire set, never talking to my audience, you know, that sort of thing. And through the process of getting sort of over that and learning how much fun it is for me to experience music with my audience and be present with them and tell stories, for instance, or share and be open. It's allowed me to be so much more that way in real life when I'm meeting strangers or if I'm getting to know somebody to be able to be incredibly present with them while I'm speaking with them versus being like, I don't know, like a little bit shy or whatever. And okay, that's enough for me. I got to go home and watch Netflix or something, you know, like I'm definitely bleeds over. That is just one circumstance and example of how, you know, my livelihood and my practice in my art has bled over into my life. And there's so many different things that are like that, you know, that are I wouldn't be who I am, you know, as a father or a friend or a son or a brother, if I didn't take the time to do this with my art, you know, for instance, and I think it can definitely, for anybody, anybody bleed over, if you take the care and the time to truly explore what it is you do in your craft, you'll learn these little lessons that are like, Hey, what about this and that as well, that everything is relatable, it goes into all these different facets of your life. You know, it's pretty cool. It's pretty amazing to help. How have you been able to use that component of exposure with your son? Oh, yeah, I mean, so me and my son, just the coolest relationship, we're just, you know, we're always laughing and we're just really, really close. And, you know, I mean, musically, he sort of, I'm the kind of parent who doesn't like force him to play music or anything. I just let him be curious on his time, and it works really well. He'll come in and be like, Oh, what are you doing? And like, I'll be like, Oh, I'm doing this, check this out. Oh, this is what I just learned how to do. Oh, listen to this take, it sounds crazy, you know, it will allow for whatever, you know, and it just, I think it allows me to be really me with him. And it allows him to be him with himself, you know, so it's the same as me. It's not, I suppose, as easy with everyone on the planet. Some people are harder than others to drop in with, you know. But I would say that all around that would be one of the biggest things is to just be able to show up as yourself always, you know, and that it's the best way to do anything, even really uncomfortable conversations, you know, it's like, it makes all of those things a little easier and just more honest. And I feel like it's the best policy, you know, rather than putting up a face or like a mask or being like, Oh, I better sugarcoat something or whatever. I'll just say yes now, even though I can't go somewhere, you know, I'll just say I will. And then, you know, just all those sort of things, it kind of leads into everything like that, you know. It's a better policy to just show up just as you are. The show will go better. Was there was there a point in time when you felt like I know you said when you first started this journey, you were more nervous and I've had that experience also with different endeavors that I've embarked on. Did you ever, do you have like one time when maybe you had like what people now are referring to as an ego death? I mean, some ego is good, right? But there's there's a definite point like I can name my point when I had an ego death. And it happens sometimes daily. Yeah, I mean, I think it's happened to me multiple times. Like I've had had a few of those, you know, and I think it's because there's never just it's pretty layered, egos are pretty layered, the ego is layered, you know, it grows back, you know, and in a different way. And I don't think it'll ever end. Because I'm constantly becoming a new person learning new things. And as the way life is, you know, you're bound to get checked, you know, into realizing, you know, waking up in a sense of what reality is. So there's been a number of those in my life. And it was just why I keep feeling better and better the older I get. You know, it's like, you just let go a little more and more of what you think you need, what you think you want people to think of you, you know, and how little that important of importance that is, and how much better life is when you really are coming from that space, you know, and you're coming from a space of exploring and what can I discover and how cool is life and how cool is this that I woke up today and, you know, I get to do these things and, you know, right, because ultimately that comes from a place of self doubt really. Yeah, you know. Well, and then further matter of wanting to be good enough, you know, really is usually goes to that level, you know, we, we at some point didn't feel good enough for somebody and it hurts and we want to, you know, put a check in that box and they're like, okay, I'm finally good enough for the world or whatever, you know, but you just are, I mean, you're just living and that doesn't exist. It's, it's all fine. It really is. Right. Just being you is good enough. I love that. So, you know, I have another question and then I want to see if we have time for another little something. How do you feel like growing up in Hawaii and being able to develop everything in, in your practice and your skills here has contributed to your depth of music and how you do things? Yeah, I mean, that's a, that's a big question because I've always and still do feel very lucky to have been born and raised here. Obviously, it's this little speck in the globe and, you know, there's to be on this little landmass and, you know, be a little baby that decided to choose to be born out of my mother here is pretty cool and I always feel like that's pretty cool. And I also am somebody who's quite spiritual and I feel like there's a lot of influences and energy here, you know, and I, so I am grateful for, for having that upbringing always. And, you know, I couldn't name or put any kind of formula on what it is and how that worked, but I know that it has. And I feel very grateful that I have been lucky enough to have that exposure. And it comes out, I think, almost certainly in my music for sure. You know, yeah. It's just, I mean, it just kind of goes back to the whole saying I guess homegrown, right? I mean, that's. And everybody and there's cool, cool music everywhere. And it's, I feel like it is because of where they're from. I mean, that's why I like to go travel and see other musicians from other places and anywhere you go, you'll find these amazing musicians and then you can just feel where they're from coming out of them. And it's, it's so cool. It's so cool. I think it's the greatest thing. Yeah. So I had an idea about asking you if you might be open to sharing a little bit of your music today. And at first I thought, Oh gosh, I love the word. I love that song shine. And then I'm like, Oh, but I love sway. And I mean, there's so many. I could have just gone on and on and on. Is there any way that you might share something, just whatever comes up for you right now, based on what we're talking about, putting you on the spot? Anything I want to play? Yeah, anything. That was a perfect conversation today. And it just really shows your depth. And it shows your vulnerability. And it shows your authenticity, everything, your exposure, everything we talked about today. And I just, I can't thank you enough for showing up and showing up 150% totally you. And you were raw. You were real. And I love that. And I love you for it. Mahalo, Mahalo, Mahalo so much for and all involving me and having me be a part of this. Really appreciate it. And I hope everybody likes watching it. Oh, I'm sure they will. And if y'all want to see more of Tavana, you can check him out on Instagram. He's got an awesome YouTube channel. He has a link tree where you can check out all of his music and different events and everything that he's doing. So please check that out. Find him at Tavana official on IG and all the information is there. Thanks again, Tavana. And thank you so much to Think Tech Hawaii. Thanks for providing this platform for us to be able to discuss and have conversations about all of the things that maybe lie beneath the surface that are present in all of us. And thank you so much for our sponsors and donors and everyone that keeps us going. So with that, until I see you again, Mahalo.