 Well, hello, and welcome to Understand Men Now. I'm Jonathan Asley of johnathanasley.com, and I'm so excited to be shooting this short video for you today, our topic, the seven, wait a minute. How do I get to seven texting mistakes people make? OK, seven texting mistakes people make. OK, well, before we get started really quickly, if the content here resonates with you and you are interested in asking me a direct question from a coaching perspective, check out the link below the schedule of free discovery call to see if working with the coach is right for you. And please hit subscribe and hit the bell to get notified of new content. All right, those seven, let's do this right for the thumbnail. Seven texting mistakes people make. All right, first off, I'm going to just start with the, OK, this is the umbrella of all mistakes people make in when it comes to communicating with one another, whether this is online dating, whether this is dating, whether this is just communicating with human beings. The biggest grandest mistake people make is the assumption that communicating with our thumbs, communicating with our thumbs is genuine communication. I mean, these little devices, here, there's a picture of my balcony, these little devices, I mean, look at, we communicate like this with our thumbs, and we as human beings weren't prepared to communicate with our thumbs. I mean, what makes us unique is the fact that we have imposed, or what do they call it, an opposable thumb? Someone knows the terminology. Please post a comment below, opposable. Anyways, what makes us unique from all other creatures is that we have thumbs. But we weren't designed to communicate with our thumbs because communication is actually, I want to say, 80, 85, 90% nonverbal, nonverbal. So it's our body language, our cues, it's our facial expressions, it's our pheromones. So when it comes from texting, we just weren't prepared for this. And this is why most human beings are bad. Okay, so from a dating perspective, I'm gonna give you seven things to contemplate today that I notice people make mistakes incessantly. I mean, just continually. Number one is that they don't use a person's name when they're texting someone, especially if it's your first communication from a dating site. It's so important to use a person's name. In fact, I'm gonna help you with a little acronym for four things to remember right now. And it's called NICE, N-I-C-E, NICE. And the N stands for using a person's name. When we use our name, we perk up, we pay attention. So use a person's name. The I stands for inquisitive. Be inquisitive, ask questions. That's how we move conversation along is when we ask questions. And it's so hugely important to ask questions from a dating perspective because how do you get to know one another? I mean, you could say, hi, how's it going? What's your day like, blah, blah, blah. That's fucking boring. Oops, I cursed, I didn't mean to. What I mean to say is be inquisitive, ask question. The C stands for compliment. Throw in a compliment. Ladies, if you're communicating with men, you need to understand is men get so few compliments in a day. So compliment him on something on his profile, compliment on his clothes, throw in some sort of compliment because that's gonna perk us men up, okay? Now the E stands for enthusiasm. Be enthusiastic, show a level of like excitement. It could be an emoji, something that generates some spark because then that creates the conversation going. I know many of you struggle with communication. This is why I wanna recommend that you check out the book, Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. This will teach you how to communicate better, not for texting, but from a relationship perspective because the vast majority of people are terrible at communicating when it comes to romantic love. I mean, why are therapist office filled with couples seeking that moderator to navigate the conversation between two people? Now most likely it's because most individuals are suffering on the inside in some way, shape, or form of not feeling good enough, not feeling lovable, not feeling likable. This is why I highly recommend you check out my book, What the heck is self love anyway? Because the antidote to inner suffering is self love. The antidote to suffering is self love. So I want you to check out my book, The Links Below. All right, really quickly, is this resonating with you? Cause I'm about to share the three most important things. Please post a comment if this is sinking in, if my content is resonating with you. All right. One of the things that human beings are terrible at is, I wrote it down, is acknowledging what the other person said. This is a huge mistake in texting. Now I know texting is designed for, hey, I'm running late or whatever, but when you're actually communicating with texting, then you're gonna have to use your thumbs a little more and acknowledge what the other person says. So when someone says, hey, I had a great Sunday, hey, that's great, you had a great Sunday, and then blah, blah, blah. Follow up by acknowledging what they said. Now, I shared before compliments, but the one thing men get so few of is appreciation. So that second, the sixth thing is appreciation. My gosh, ladies, if you knew how much men are thirsty for appreciation, you'd find out that they generally want to lean into relationship when they feel appreciated for their efforts. So I want you to begin to show appreciation and not just the word thank you, a huge word include this in your vocabulary is the word appreciation when you're communicating via text messaging. And last and not least, bump, bump, bump, said with the red sweater on is accepting the other person. Accepting the other person. What I mean to say is we, I just started this conversation by people are bad at this process, but when we come from a place of compassion for another human being, we don't have to end up in relationship with someone, but let's just accept that maybe they're bad at this process of using their thumbs. And if we can accept that they might be bad at the process of using their thumbs, we can recognize and have a little more compassion by leading by example. And ladies, everything I shared here, men should be doing the same thing. Lead by example, if he's not lead, if he's not following your track of your communication, it either might be a misalignment because you're not on a two lane street, you might be misalignment, or he just may need a little time to catch up with you. But if he doesn't catch up, it's okay to move on. Okay, it's okay to move on. You don't have to try to grasp it every person that you meet online and you're communicating via text. Okay, is this resonating? Did it help? Please post a comment, check out the links below, schedule a discovery call, join my group, join my YouTube channel. Okay, I'm gonna wrap up this video as I always do first off, giving myself a big, gigantic Jotland Bear hug of self love. I'm gonna reach into the camera and give you a hug of love. I'm gonna ask you to turn to someone and give them a hug of love because hugs are a great source of love and we can all use a lot of love right now. And by the way, if you don't have anyone to hug, a pet or a teddy bear works as well. Thanks so much, wishing you a fabulous day. Bye-bye now.