 What's up everybody this is Chris from the rewired soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution And if you are new here my channel is all about mental health So if you're down to improve your mental and emotional health make sure you subscribe to my channel hit that little notification bell Because I'm always making videos today though. I have a very special video for you I got my buddy Pam to do a guest video on here So social anxiety is something that I haven't covered enough and I get asked about it all the time I am somebody who struggled Very very very very much with social anxiety. I was never just comfortable in my own skin for me personally Being uncomfortable in my own skin is what led to my drug and alcohol addiction when I was drunk or high I was able to finally just feel comfortable Without that I was always just racing my own thoughts and just thinking of like, what are they thinking of me? Do I look all right? Am I sounding all right and all these thoughts if you have social anxiety know exactly what I'm talking about So Pam is actually an actress and we've been trying to do a collab together We were talking and throwing around some ideas and she actually has a course coming up about how to be comfortable on camera I'm like girl why don't you come on over here and just talk about how to be comfortable in your own skin So I know a lot of you watching this are not looking to have a career in Acting but this is a great video with some tips from Pam about how to simply be comfortable in your own skin Which is great when you're meeting new people and when you have to do some kind of presentation at work Or even if you're at school so check out this video from Pam stay around Let me know how you like it and I'll see you when we get back Hey fans of Rewired Soul, this is Pamela from the channel Pamela D And I'm so happy to be here with you today I've been talking with Chris a lot about doing some collaborations between our two channels My channel is about vegan lifestyle. So like not at all really related to Chris's channel where he deals with addiction and depression and how to manage those things and how to Try and overcome those things in your life So our channels are not really directly related But Chris and I have been talking a lot over p.m. On Facebook and the more we chat the more we realize that We care about a lot of the same things and we struggle with a lot of the same things and we want to Give a lot of the same hope and messages to the people who follow our channels So that's why we decided to do this collaboration today. I recently launched an online course about how to be comfortable on camera I am an actress. I've been trained in acting and I've done a lot of content creation So I know a little bit about being comfortable on camera. Chris and I were talking about well What does it actually take to be comfortable on camera and the more we chatted the more we realized that I can throw out all kinds of tactics and mindset tips and everything but If you're not comfortable in your own skin The camera will pick that up and the camera will know that you're not feeling comfortable So in order to be really truly comfortable doing something like making a video What you need to do first is feel comfortable in your own skin And that is a much tougher nut to crack And I think that the audience the Chris's audience will relate to this and Chris gives so much Good advice not only mindset advice But also like actionable things that you can do to start helping yourself And that's why I love Chris's channel and I'm sure that's why a lot of you follow him as well It's because he helps you on so many levels It's the the mental game the tactical actionable game all those things are there being comfortable in your own skin is is really something that Can be a very huge challenge for people like me and people like Chris who've been through some kind of devastating things in our lives How do we overcome that it is definitely a long road to haul It's not something where you can just kind of change these three things and in a month's time You'll be all better. It doesn't work that way because this all goes back to how you perceive yourself And I truly believe that people who don't feel comfortable in their own skin perceive themselves as Not worthy or as less than somehow and I don't mean to psychoanalyze anyone I'm really more speaking from my personal experience than anything else, but I think that My personal experience is not unique in this regard. I sit here before you and I want to give you Some inspiration hopefully inspire you about how to become more comfortable in your own skin But I want you to know that I'm saying these things because I know What I'm talking about and I know what it means to feel horrible inside. I'm gonna start crying I don't want to I don't want this to like get really heavy Well, there are some tips that I can share Like I said, this is a journey. This is not a do these three things and you're gonna be better like in a month It's it doesn't work that way because it all goes back to How you perceive yourself? So really the answer to becoming comfortable in your own skin and hence being comfortable on camera is That you have to change how you perceive yourself. You have to change how you think of yourself. That's no easy task So, how do you do that? I truly strongly believe in doing what I call taking a leap of faith And that's just what it sounds like taking a leap of faith You know, I am after college when I was late I moved into an apartment and I was living off on my own and I had a couple of roommates. I had a roommate who at the time oh She was a mess and she was just so down on herself and so insecure and so unhappy I mean, I thought I went through some bad stuff in high school but I can't even imagine what this poor girl had girl had gone through in her life and I remember her asking me What she could do to get out of this mental state that she was in She felt like she couldn't do anything. She felt paralyzed and I said if you feel paralyzed then That's the time then you take action anyway That you take action in spite of yourself. So that's what I call taking a leap of faith and That can mean anything from if you're scared to do a video Then turn the camera on and do it anyway. Do it badly fail. Be be shitty on camera You don't have to show this to anybody just the act of doing it and And kind of getting that out of your system and taking some action will start to help you Prove to yourself That even though you feel terrible and even though you doubt yourself that you actually really can do this Maybe you'll do it badly. Maybe you won't maybe you'll make a fantastic video and you're super talented And you never knew this because you didn't give yourself a chance You never know what you might discover about yourself But if you don't take a leap of faith first, you will never discover it and nothing will ever change You know that saying that goes Speak your truth even though your voice shakes That's what I want you to do speak your truth Either vocally speaking literally speaking or speak your truth meaning Do the things you want to do anyway I know easier said than done. I know it takes a lot of Sometimes you literally have to force yourself out the door much less shooting video or doing anything else Sometimes you literally have to force yourself To do the things that you're afraid to do or that you don't want to do because what that does for you is It starts to give you a history of accomplishment If i'm depressed and I don't want to go out the door Maybe I just go out the door and I make myself go for a 10 minute walk or a five minute walk And I come right back home where I feel safe But the act of getting out the door Is an accomplishment that is now recorded in my brain proving to myself that I can do it So you start taking these leaps of faith even in small ways And it'll start building this history of okay. Yes, I can do this and maybe I can do the next thing And maybe I can do even something bigger after that don't get ahead of yourself But just know that the more little things you do the more leaps of faith that you take in yourself The more it will be easier to do those in the future as well So that's my first tip taking that leap of faith and doing Even if you don't feel like it doing even if you doubt yourself my next tip for becoming comfortable in your own skin is Do something for somebody else you can do things like volunteering at an animal shelter volunteering at a hospital or at A home for elderly folks volunteering your time In a way that you give of yourself To your community or to your neighbors or friends or even just you know go to your mom's house and help her clean the kitchen I don't know. You know if you have a relationship like that where you can do that with your mom Pick somebody else if you don't just find someone in your life or an organization that you believe in Volunteer a half hour of your time an hour of your time even just once a week The more we do things for other people That accomplishes a couple things it it makes us feel good about helping So there's kind of this intrinsic selfish motivation too it's like not only are you helping other people but You feel good about that so you get your own kind of like warm fuzzy feeling from that the other thing that it accomplishes is that It makes you at least for that half hour or for that hour It kind of forces you to take Your focus off of yourself and all of the Shit that's going on in your life and it forces you to focus on something else on helping someone else You know because if you're at an animal shelter and an animal needs Your help or an old folks home and there is a person there that needs your help your attention It's going to be on helping rather than you're putting your attention on All the negative that's going on in your life. It's not going to fix the negative But it will help relieve some of that Constant focus that you have on what's going wrong in your life And the more that you can do that the more that'll help you build your confidence And the more that'll give your brain a break from just focusing on all the negativity The third oh this hits so close to home for me the third tip that I have for you is Don't read the paper. Don't read the news. Like I'm not saying don't stay informed about what happens in the world I don't want people thinking that I think that we should just all turn off our TVs And not know what's going on in the world. That is terrible. That's a terrible idea Let me tell you another little story. So to illustrate my point Uh, I called a family member up recently and I'm not going to say who but I called a family member up recently for Just some advice about um one of my dogs. I have two dogs one is very elderly and he's having a lot of problems lately and I know he probably doesn't have a lot of time left I don't want to start crying about that too so let's just say that um You know, he's having some issues and I needed some support So I called this family member And they were extremely supportive like no doubt they support me and they helped me figure things out with my dog And then this person started launching into all the people in the world that don't take care of their animals and that turned into Oh, I read in the paper about a mother who killed her children And then I read in the other paper about some father who killed his boys while they were sleeping and literally this person went from helping me figure out my dog situation to The sky is falling and these horrible people in the world killing their offspring and What are we going to do and and I had to just interrupt them. I was like wait a second. How did we get from I need help with my dog. Can you help me out to people killing each other? Yes, those are tragic Obviously those things are tragic But concentrating on those things and letting that kind of negative news Invade your conscience from the moment you get up to the moment you go to bed And even while you're sleeping that does nobody any good least of all you That does not help you so turn off the tv stop reading all the You know titillating articles about people killing each other and hurting each other Start seeing the good in the world again easier said than done. I know that but if I can just distill this tip down to like one sentence I would say stop watching the news keep informed about the important things that are going on in the world, but Do we really need to know about every single murder that happens in the world? I mean god, I think I would have jumped off a cliff by now if I Considering all the violence in the world if I let that just take over my psyche You've got to find a way to live in this world that can be very horrible at times But live in it as a productive and hopefully happy person There's another thing about you become what you focus on and that is so true this family member that I spoke with they focus on What's wrong in the world and this person is not a happy person and I don't want that for you I don't want that for them either I know that I can't change anyone but I hope that through sharing these personal experiences with you and sharing some tips with you that I can at least kind of help you manage Your life and help you become more comfortable in your own skin. So hopefully this has helped you. I hope it has Feel free to check out my channel. Feel free to leave me a comment in And this channel in the comments below. Let me know what you think. Were these tips helpful? I want to help other people who are struggling with these things and I want to help people Somehow think better of themselves to transform the way they see themselves and the way they see the world So if this has helped you even in a small way, definitely let me know. Thank you for watching and Be sure to subscribe to the rewired soul with the subscribe button right down here And I hopefully we'll see you guys again Bye. Bye What a great video that was thank you so much Pam For coming over and doing this guest video like you touched on so many great topics My favorite one Was just talking about that leap of faith and just going and like For anybody who struggles with depression like this is the biggest tip that I can give anybody to A lot of depression Is about not having the motivation to just get started And sometimes you just got to force yourself to do that one little thing And then a snowballs into some bigger bigger bigger things that helps you get out of that depressive fun So I want to know from you down in the comments. What did you take away from this video? What was your favorite tip that pam gave you? But check it out If you haven't yet make sure you're checking up in the info card pam has her own channel I put a link to it if you want to go over there and check it out Like she said she does a lot with vegan lifestyle But she also has a course coming up about being comfortable on camera And like like I said at the start of this video Even if you're not trying to pursue an acting career or be a youtuber like us Like this is a great course just to learn how to Be in front of people because we all have to do it. Like I have to do work presentations all the time I have to talk to like owners of companies. I have to talk to families. I have to talk to CEOs It's crazy. So if you would like go check out pam's channel. Make sure you follow her course is coming out soon But yeah, anyways, if you if you like this video, make sure you give it a thumbs up And again, if you are new here, make sure you click that little round subscribe button I don't know what you're waiting for Also, if you haven't yet click or tap on the side right there Not only is there a thumbnail for another video on this channel, but there's also another link to pam's youtube channel So thanks for watching. I'll see you all next time