 was sharing this the sense of kind of coming into the depth of it with the light and being a bit disconcerted, disoriented, confused. It's pretty much how the spiritual journey goes. You go through these periods where you're exposed to a lot of things rapidly sometimes and then the mind kind of spins around and and the ego tries to adapt to it and there's one section in the text of a Course in Miracle called the Heal Relationships, quite a famous text. It's in those nine chapters on going from special relationships to holy relationships, chapters 15 to 24 and where Jesus says he's talking about inviting the Holy Spirit into the relationship and says the Holy Spirit comes immediately after the invitation is offered but it's very disconcerting and very difficult for the ego when a new purpose is given to a relationship because the relationship was formed out of unholy purposes. That's what the world was made in hatred so all interpersonal relationships start with attractions and codependencies and needs and all kinds of baggage from the past and that's the unholy purpose for relationships which is specialness. Then when you invite the Holy Spirit and it can actually be disjunctive and it could be in a group setting like this or it could be in a relationship where you've drawn to somebody and all of a sudden the prayer of your heart is play spirit come into my relationship and help me and it can be so disjunctive that so much resistance comes up the mind wants to just ego wants to break off the relationship immediately because it doesn't suit the new goal it's almost like the ego wants to go back to the ego but the Holy Spirit's already been invited in and no chance of that and then Jesus has lied in there it would not be kinder to shift the goal more slowly. In other words there's going to be a spin in the mind when you go from upside down thinking to right side up thinking from wrong mindedness to right-mindedness there's naturally going to be a spin a drug addict that goes through detox you don't think there's a spin if you've been a heroin addict for 10 years and then you you come clean and go dry and or an alcoholic or cocaine addict or whatever you know there's a detox spin and you might say it's the same detox spin in relationships when you have had an unholy purpose for the relationship it's very horizontal suddenly a vertical beam of light is introduced which is inviting the Holy Spirit it's going to be disjunctive it's going to spin we've all been through it you know we we shouldn't even be so shocked by it you know we're calling upon healing and we've been addicted to linear time so what would you expect it's going to be a bit disorienting but it's nothing to be shaken up about and I was Jason just saying that there's some in the group that were like whoa it's it's really a bit confusing and disorienting and I know it was for me at the beginning too and then after a while you start to go well I have called on the healing and I guess I'm in no matter what it takes and I'm just going to go for it and it's got to be for the good it's like if you go underwater and you go deep down in deep sea diving and if you come to the surface too fast you could get the bends the air pressure thing is not good to come from such pressure up to the surface where there's no pressure and it's the same with the spiritual journey if you've been under intense repression and denial and intense pressure when you start to come to the surface you know it's going to be disorienting like it is when you're a deep sea diver but but you don't want to come up too fast or it can be really disorienting like dangerously disorienting and so that that's a little bit of a context for this whole awakening is that you're calling on the healing and and in one sense you start to get a little bit a little bit used to it you never get completely used to the disorientation but but it's just good to remind yourself this is just temporary this too shall pass it's not a permanent condition we get flushed out of our comfort zones but it's really what we want actually because these have been ego comfort zones and they're like ego death zones artificial artificial intelligent artificial comfort and who wants to go through life with a bunch of artificial comforts when there's no joy there's no peace in that it's just like it's the comforts of defense mechanisms you know they minimize fear they were designed by the ego to minimize fear without letting it go you got to remember the less part of that sentence defense mechanisms were made by the ego to minimize fear sounds pretty good at the start without letting it go so really to minimize fear and keep it that's what the ego is using these defense mechanisms so that's why projection offers a little bit of comfort get it off your chest blast them tell them how you feel tell them your truth i always like that stuff your truth your truth how many truths are there what's this your true stuff be vulnerable let it out rip it let it rip blast them give it to them this projection stuff is not actually going to bring you any comfort it's actually like firing a laser beam into a mirror and it's going to zap you eventually because the whole idea of projection is to try to get rid of something that you do not want but it's how you actually keep it you keep it by projecting you blame you feel guilty and you keep the guilt and you blame again you feel guilty you keep the guilt the projections never work they they're actually terrible devices for getting rid of guilt so worst thing you can do if you want to get rid of guilt is is projected it's like it's to you you know it's like get off and it's just not going anywhere it's just gonna stay and stay and stay and stay so so I would just say is a summary from what Jason's group was talking about this morning is that yeah there's going to be this orientation but but just go with it in the sense that just remind yourself it won't stay and and you remember you're turning your mind from upside down to right side up it's like the Titanic's not a good example because the Poseidon adventure anybody seen the Poseidon adventure there was the first Poseidon adventure then there was the second Poseidon adventure they're movies the first one had the theme song from Marine McGovern there's got to be a morning after if we can hold on through the night we have a chance to find the sunshine let's keep on looking for the light you know it's come through the darkness but the whole ship is capsized ships are not designed to be in the water upside down so it's very dark in the Poseidon adventure and they're trapped in the darkness like a planet earth trapped in the darkness and they've got to go up toward the light which is they've got to go everything's upside down so the their journey is you know the they're trying to go toward the air pocket and toward the light and towards freedom which the the chandeliers and the lights are all on the floor and the doorways in these high rooms are way up in the corner there's no ladders either it's a tough journey you gotta find your way to get up to the doorways which are way up on what seems to be the ceiling because everything is upside down and that's what you're doing when you're navigating the spiritual journey everything is upside down it's all capsized and now you've got to go for the right mind in this which is why everything in this world is backwards and upside down so you cannot judge your advances from your retreats you cannot even judge your successes from your failures if you're so confused in this state of mind that you don't know the difference between pain and joy which Francis and I did a talk on recently and Jesus says that in the course you cannot tell the difference in this state between pain and joy then you really have to realize honestly that you don't know your own best interests and once you start to open up to that you can start to have a context for how clueless that you really are and this goes a little bit into what Kirsten's group was about was about and Francis I remember saying in her group it was about trust because there's not the structure on this awakening journey that that the ego has imposed lots of structure to minimize the chaos and you're going into more of a trusting non-structured guided way of living more spontaneous actually and less structured because the ego has imposed heavy structure to try to minimize the chaos and that little screw is turning around so so trust was the topic that came up in Francis's group and and we talked about that the other day it's not so much trust in people but it's just developing a trust in your intuition and in the spirit that's there for you all the time you're always getting your instructions and your guidances but when there's a lot of fear and resistance in the mind then the ego doesn't want you to hear that those instructions and those guidances they want you to show throw in heavy interference patterns so that you won't hear the voice of God and and take journey up and out so the what interference patterns yeah those those are like these floods of of streams of doubt thoughts from the past because the ego is terrified of the Holy Spirit is terrified of the awakening is terrified of the whole erection of healing because it's a death wish and it's terrified of anything that resembles healing or like if you have loving experiences the ego will go from suspicious to vicious it absolutely hammers the mind when you start to have loving experiences because it's almost like whoa whoa whoa you're not escaping here almost like like having a little mousetrapped and the mouse starts to find a way out and it just puts the foot down on the tail oh no i'm thinking for a millennium and you're not getting out so quick you know it's it's very strong it doesn't want you escaping from time and space so so that's where in times when the lesson comes in to be vigilant for God and His kingdom you you really have to just remind yourself okay i'm not gonna bite i'm not gonna bite on that the way i always said it was i'm not gonna conclude anything because these attack thoughts these guilt thoughts are hammering the mind hoping the mind will just give in and go into a cycle of depression and eventually beyond depression into suicide because that's that's what a death wish does it that's what it wants it wishes for death so depression is just a sending the mind towards the death wish towards but death of course we talked about is no escape but it's just that the ego is just promoting its thought system which what a death wish promotes thoughts of death and sickness pain suffering so the trust has to build it has to grow and that's also why you you may feel like it's it's quite strange like some of the guidances the ego will judge is weird those that's ridiculous you know i had times where i would receive a guidance to call somebody you go see them that's ridiculous we haven't talked in years don't be foolish let them make the first move you're not calling them you know it's it just is going to be very offended against these beautiful miracle impulses that can really free your mind where you can be truly helpful no in your heart so you have to just be aware that the ego is going to to come in with a strong way let's see and then was there anything else in your victim hood being very strong my will is this is not my will it's jason mentioned to me it was the sayings of of thanks seeming to happen and then the judgment of being this is not my will this is not what i want this is definitely going the wrong way and so on so forth these kind of judgments can just come up it's helpful to remember the context in the early part of the workbook where jesus says in no situation do you perceive your own best interest he doesn't say in some or in most he says in no it seemed an ego just objects and goes oh come on i've at least hit a long life there's got to be some situations where i saw my own best interest there's got to be some but the reason in no situation do you perceive your own best interest is that the holy spirit doesn't know what situational thinking is situations are part of newtonian linear timeline even thinking that you're in a room listening to david hoffmeister give a talk you know in downtown arhus and say now that's a situation yeah that's trying to pull out of the entire quantum field of a little tiny little spec and give it a name and give it a label and really you're all of it you're everything the whole cosmos is in you and you're everything so when you try to squeeze anything down to a specific situation then that's a problem you're trying to limit it's almost like you're using that a tiny percentage of your brain will say like in what to believe for what's living lucy some of you might seem lucy you're just using like 10 10 percent of your brain and you're not really perceiving all cosmos as it really is just perceiving a very small fraction of what is based on your beliefs and so you're limiting your whole perception and putting the blinders on and then thinking you actually know what's going on with that 10 percent and that's why in no situation do you perceive your own best interest because actually you'll go deeper you realize there aren't even situations it's the situation of thinking is the problem we can actually convince and hoodwinked into believing that there are different situations and there aren't even different situations it's all one unified field and yet the mind thinks oh this then I go to this the next one and another and then it breaks the world all of life and the situations and then it tries to solve the situations when there aren't even situations and some of you might have seen what the bleak do we know the quantum physics movie and then the second one down the rabbit hole they did the extension and in that point there's a physicist in there who's who's describing the questions that most people ask the practical everyday questions is like asking what is the marital status of the number five most everyday questions that we ask like what's for dinner when will you pick me up where will you meet me can you stop and bring home some wine a bottle of wine on the way home from work all of the everyday questions conditions as I've said before much to do about nothing but those questions are like asking the question what is the marital status of number five it's not that their questions are wrong it's just that they're impossible questions marital status the marital marriage what is the what is the marital status single or married that makes no sense okay that's that's a movie i'll try another one what is the pregnancy status of the number five you can't get the first one what's the pregnancy status of the number five it's five pregnant or not it's just an either or this is marital status a lot of variations now i came from a era when we had married or single now it's complicated they've got a whole category on facebook you know it's a lot of but but but you see how ridiculous the question is because people will say well the number five doesn't have a marital status and certainly doesn't have a pregnancy status numbers aren't pregnant or not pregnant but when we we don't realize that with all these fake situations in this make-believe world that we put up that these questions we think are really good everyday questions we think we're having a real conversation and you know and the angels are laughing all the time all the time they're laughing because it's crazy these questions don't have any meaning and then the deeper you go and you have these deep mystical experiences then you end up laughing too at my god everything is so funny because what you thought was so serious so very serious wasn't serious at all it wasn't real but you know it can't be serious if it's not real and that's the whole point of nothing real can be threatened nothing unreal exists here in lies the peace of god the first night we talked to a lot of people said they wanted peace of mind but you have to come to that distinction nothing real can be threatened nothing unreal exists here in lies peace of god that's the summary of of course the miracle that's the three-liner conclusion that's the cliff notes some of you are not in the course that's fine doesn't have to be your pet just remember nothing real can be threatened nothing unreal exists here in lies the peace of god another topic that jason told me came up was i guess with lisa and bill's recent copenhagen thing it's just choose choose love choose love come on choose choose choose use your power of choice choose love well the only thing about that is is if you believe in the ego and that's a horrific idea that's the belief you've been separated from god that's so terrifying and so horrific that that's why it's been pushed out of awareness if you go and you interview people on the streets and you walk through the streets of our house and you stop people on their bikes and cars and you just have one survey question for you is you separate from god you're not going to get a hundred percent yes on that because why because it's not unconscious awareness except most people would say no i like i like god or maybe you say it's not use the word god because it's kind of charged over here uh let's use the word spirit you know are did you separate from spirit or whatever it's i like spirit or try the angels that's even a softer word did you separate from the angels no they're with me all they're with me all the time you're all around can't you see them our hoos is a hip town sure there's lots of people that have angels with them all the time they're not going to say no and so when we say choose love your choice is coming from your your desire but if you have an unconscious belief system that you're not aware of here's an interesting line from A Course in Miracles Jesus says a decision is a conclusion based on everything that you believe a decision you want to choose love well look at this a decision is a conclusion based on everything that you believe so if you believe anything at all that's of the ego belief system your surface life will say as a human being is more like a robot acting out unconscious beliefs you think you have free will not in this world you don't you think the Course teaches you you have free will yes clarification of terms it does say you have free will in heaven who god created you with free will which is perfect happiness it's another synonym for free will but not in time jesus actually says in his course that you are guilty in time and innocence in eternity so all this affirming about innocence i'm innocent i'm innocent i'm innocent i'm an innocent human being no no no no you are guilty in time innocent in eternity so we really have to be quite honest about uncovering these unconscious beliefs and breaking them up because it's a decision it's a conclusion based on everything you believe that your decisions as you go through this world as kind of like a robot in the ego system you're like a clone the body the personality is like a clone like the body the personality itself is like a clone and it has no free will of its own it's simply acting out the unconscious police system and so are all the other bodies and so is mother nature and so is the world you know we we see movies like lion king you know we like lion king and call the animals it's all it's like an exciting adventure then the circle of life you know all the animals are all different colors pretty colors and they're swaying no go back and watch marlin perkins animal kingdom watch every animal eating every other animal that's all he did was go around africa and film all the eating it was taking place on the planet cannibalism it just everything eating something else that's not in the lion king it's just it's you gotta you gotta give yourself a full picture you know they're all the circle of life it's the world was made in hate we're we're probably two minutes away from a slaughterhouse open the windows and you're all thinking circle of life now no no no take the blinders off there's no free will in this world and so isn't that good to know wouldn't you want that straight from the from your divine source helping you wake up in fact i mentioned that the other day in um in the movie the matrix when neo first comes to morpheus and and morpheus is talking to him and neo's asking what is the truth the first thing that morpheus says to neo is not that he is the one the first thing that he tells neo is that you are a slave that's how he starts it out that's how the teacher works with the people you are a slave a slave of something that you cannot see or smell or taste or touch you're in a prison for your mind he's telling him you are stuck in a prison in an egoic prison and you he doesn't even begin telling him he's the one he has that has to come much later through discovery and literally revelation history revealed he he has transcendence over all the images and he sees them all green and energy at the end but that's not how it starts so really what we're looking at here is when we say choose love the course is got 31 chapters 365 lessons a manual for teachers and clarification of terms and most of it as as our brother ken wapnick brought out most of it's pretty dark most of the course is really talking about what you haven't looked at what you have to face because the body's like a robot on the surface just acting out these unconscious beliefs so so it is important to choose love and you do have to cultivate the power of your choice you have to bring back to your mind the power of choice and that's even a workbook question 152 the power of decision is my own you have to be empowered to start to realize how powerful your mind is and how powerful your choice is and then everything you perceive is the result of your mind the result of choice and that's why you're not a victim there's no accidents there's no happenstance there's no oh that's unfortunate or I was unlucky today or we had a bad draw or it's a bad break or all those kind of things have nothing to do with reality that's just kind of superstitious thinking so yeah I would say in the end it's so important to choose choose love and that's what I call the atonement that's that is your choice to freedom that's choosing the correction for the distorted perception of linear time and not only is that possible but that's inevitable and I would say that as I teach and I work with people that's my whole mission is is joining in the acceptance of this atonement I really have no other purpose for the world just just choosing the correction and experiencing the innocence that comes in that correction and I did hear Brian was telling me too that it's and Jason told me from yesterday when you there's these haunting feelings that come in the human condition about you know wow I didn't I didn't tell the truth with this I didn't pay back the money or I had an affair or I I left somebody I abandoned them I rejected somebody where I was rejected I was abandoned there's these dark feelings that are in the mind and those dark feelings are always coming from the belief in the reality of the body and the reality of behavior so imagine let's just pick something more extreme imagine somebody who in the world of time is a mass murderer we could we could pick Hitler we could pick we could just pick your everyday run-of-the-mill mass murderer maybe they have exterminated millions or whatever but they wiped out 25 buried them and hit them and and they have this sense of guilt they've taken lives they've murdered and there's a judgment going on around the behavior that they actually believe they've killed although at lucy we learned nobody ever dies anyway it's just a misperception even then the cows nearby are going to the slaughterhouse and that there's killing going on a matter of meters from this place where we are now that's a misperception because again when we think we've done things wrong or we think we've not done things that we should have done that's where the guilt's coming in but you see the guilt is projected to the behaviors the guilt is attributed to these behaviors wrong doings and i'll tell you right now it's an ontological guilt the only guilt in the mind is is a choice for the perspective of wrong mindedness you can actually choose again you can be trained to see everything with the Holy Spirit through the miracle and it won't matter what the form is it won't matter what the form was because the form was a misperception and the guilt is attributed to a misperception so i think that's that's practical that's what prime was saying those things come up when you're do these healing seminars and healing workshops then you can notice there's still these haunting ideas if something was done wrong or something could have been different could have been better and what we were joining in the car is that it's an amazing perspective that everything has always been working together for the good and you just didn't know it yeah that self that that self that is identified with with the era you know with with these beliefs in the mind that i have done something wrong that i need to now correct that is still trying to solve the problem at the level of the problem and given the expression that questions come up a lot now that i have to say is exact words to this certain person that i have this grievance with well that self that believes that they have done something wrong or that they have the grievance that self what needs to be forgiven so taking the action from the place of the identification with gills it's not it's not going to work it's the forgiveness in the mind it's getting over that identification with a misperception over is where the innocence experience i mean if the guidance from the spirit comes it's coming from a source that is true rather than trying to solve the problem and then remember the world and the focus that jesus says what you do comes from what you think so it is with your thoughts that we must work you see how important it is when jesus says it's mind training he's really not joking he's really saying oh yeah you do need mind training you have a lot of attack thoughts in your mind your mind's upside down and working has to flip it around to where it's it's bathed in light and you think only the thoughts of god that's a big turnaround yeah i think um someone mentioned in my group which is a really good point like what is different from all of coming here and just watching some of the youtube clips back home and i i want to say that the reason is everything is so orchestrated by the spirit the fact that you're coming here and everything that is happening and every thought that you have is an actual opportunity to see what is underneath and to actually release them it's not a hypothetical situation anymore it's not that you sit there watching a youtube and you go back deep what could be there a city in the unconscious mind now everything coming up and you're active participant in a way that you don't sit back and just inactively watch and then think oh i don't have to be part of that because there's some intensity but actually there is involvement and it's all happening for you actually just for you and all the things that's coming up perceptions guilt suddenly all these situations little scenarios that's happening it's all actually to to help because of the call and because the spirit is behind all of it so that's that's what i really want to say that you are somehow a very big part of this and things are happening all by accident and the the awakening is as i was saying earlier doesn't have to be long and drawn out but how many of you were able to see that movie inception it was a very good movie because it's the first time i've seen a movie that was using the metaphor of dreaming and architects and building worlds and building environments but it actually brought in the the concept of layers of dreaming like layer upon layer upon layer like five six seven layers and that the whole amnesia of forgetting love and light and god is a defense against that love is is dreaming and then the best way to really guard against that light from the ego's perspective is to forget that you're dreaming in other words to have defense mechanisms and then forget that you made them up and forget that it's all a dream so it's the opposite of lucid dreaming where you're completely aware that you're dreaming the first major obstacle really that you're going to have to uncover in your mind is you approach the light is that you've got to come closer closer to seeing that you're the dreamer of the dream you've got to come closer to dreaming you have to come closer to awareness of just seeing that the world is not an actual objective world that's outside of you that has a physical reality but that it's actually a dream and then the more you're aware that you're the dreamer of the dream you may even seem to have more control over some bits and pieces like people tell me they love their flying dreams they don't get to do it much during the day these kind of dreams so they go into their and they like to fly because it's the symbol of more freedom oh i'm just flying all over the place and david you were with me and we were flying together and you tell me how they're flying dreams because it's it's the symbol of more freedom actually i went to bed the other night two or three nights ago and for the first time i was staying at the city's house over in the they call it the add-on room the annex i was over in the annex there's no water or there was no running water or liquid or anything but i'm i was dreaming and i was like i was dreaming dreaming and if i dream i say i'm thirsty and i thought but this room has no no liquids or anything and then and in my dream i'm thinking what is my dream i said it can't affect if i wanted to have you know and so i was there and i was dreaming and i said no and i said no i've been through the whole room and there's no there's no liquid in there and then i said no there has to be no i i want there to be i want there to be so i went over and i i i was dark and i let my hand go out and and there's a can of sprite and and i was like ah there it is i knew this you know this is cold didn't want to go out of my shorts in the rain and you know it just but it's it's just a symbol of oh no this is a dream this is a dream you know it's it's loosens your mind from thinking that it's just like you're stuck you're stuck in some kind of situation or some kind of thing where you don't have what you need isn't that a common ego tactic oh my life would be so much better if i had this or i had that or i wasn't stuck in this job or i wasn't stuck in this relationship or if i had a relationship in my dream where are you dreaming partner i know you're out there you know it's it's this thing like all would be wonderful if something was different in the dream but if you've forgotten that you're dreaming and now you think you're a dream figure just at the mercy of a massive world a massive cosmos that seems outside of you that's where you get into this feeling of feeling like a victory that's when you feel helpless so you see how practical this healing is and how practical this course of miracle is is it's telling you you're not going to wake up from the dream that you're not even aware that you're dreaming you have to first work towards forgiveness and all that forgiveness will show you actually is that you are the dreamer of the world of dreams that's what jesus says you are the dreamer of the world of dreams no other cause does it have forever will isn't that great to know what the big lesson is the only lesson that there is to get in this whole world is one thing that you are the dreamer of the dream and why is that so important because jesus says you can't change the purpose for the dream until you are aware that you're dreaming isn't that important when the world was made in hate do you want to continue on believing that you're just a figure in a dream that was made in hate that's going to be a lot of victimization that's going to be a lot of mistreatment but if you can get back in your mind far enough by just clearing your unconscious mind and doing your forgiveness lessons and you can see that you're the dreamer of the dream here comes the holy spirit new purpose happy dream time fun joy love laughter new purpose the holy spirit has a new purpose for the world but you can't accept it as long as you denied it you're the dreamer you can't accept it as a person i can't say okay i'm david i'm david i want a happy dream if david a happy dream holy spirit david is david's just a figure in a dream david's not gonna ever have a happy dream your mind can't and you see you're dreaming but david's not gonna ever have a happy dream you see how that works you can't how could you be a figure in a dream that's not even real and be happy when the whole dream was made out of hatred every sabre in that dream is his hatred you know on some roads you travel gaily for a while before the darkness fear enters you know but we all know we've been we've had enough experience with planet earth we know we know it's dark we know there's got to be another way we know we know that's been for me the whole focus that's why i was forgiving that's why i was letting go of all these beliefs emptying my mind to learn this course requires willingness to question every value that you hold not one can be kept hidden or that will obscure your learning it will keep you from seeing you're the dreamer of the dream one belief in your mind just one can keep you from seeing you're the dreamer can keep you in health instead of taking you back to heaven just one unquestioned assumption one one believe that's what the layers and an inception are all about remember for those of you that saw inception they need a kick they need to design a kick so they all feel the kick at the same time we all wake up together there's not one of us waking up while other seven billion say step there's only one of us actually so when we wake up there can only one of us waking up it's not done piecemeal this isn't the hundredth monkey kind of thing oh we've got six billion seven hundred eighty five thousand jesus are we close enough to know all it just takes one and that one is you seeing that you're the dreamer of the dream it's not you as a person you're not going to wake up that way so it's really deep but we've got some great movies this week and we've got some amazing tools to help you work with this because it's that deep you know it's that's that much of a mess for us it's part of it because if you we value one aspect of the stream you value the whole train it's like there's one part of that that you'd like to hold on to you're saying really this is not a dream this is my reality there's something real about this that i want and if you want a little part of that it brings the whole world with it we don't get to pick and choose it's either real or it's not it's either a dream which means it's it's not a value to hold on to i mean dream is an illusion or it's real so to question every value that we hold is to be saying is to be willing that is choosing love like if you don't know what love is you can't choose it and the self that's forgotten god has forgotten love so that self can't really choose love and say i love i know what love is and i choose it because that self is still believing in a dream that self the only way to open up to love is through forgiveness this forgiveness is forgiving this identification that is loosening the mind from holding on to aspects of the dream that it's identified with and that forgiveness and the bringing the illusions to the light the willingness to to see the identification of what we think we need what we think we want what we think we value as we relieve ourselves from these beliefs then we're allowing the truth into our awareness we're actually allowing the love to come the innocence to come back into our awareness so it is a path of bringing the darkness to the light not bringing the truth into the illusions and that's just one of the core teachings of of course the miracles and and really what the core is behind every everything that we're constantly sharing because we're worthy of the truth we're worthy of being with god and god is obscured by the desire for something else and you want something other than god you can't know god it's total god is total love and to know thyself is to know i am one with god all acceptance of the attainment it can't be partial we can't want two things so we have to keep seeing what we think we want and seeing what we think we know even spiritually i know how to forgive i know what to do i know what i want it's it's in that hard opening of prayer it's recognizing where there's an experience of upset or we think there's something that we want and through through bringing it to the light with this prayer for help we're actually opening our mind out to the sea i in all these travels to the last quarter of a century and meeting all these these course of miracles so many wonderful brothers and sisters all over the world i got this feeling in my heart as i was traveling around stronger stronger that every one of you every one that i was meeting that we were like lifelong companions on this amazing journey you know like every one of you is my partner every one of you is my beloved every one of you this is it out of out of everything we've been called to wake up we've been called to come together we've been called to hold hands so to speak to join lines to say there's nothing that can come between us you know you are all to me my mighty companions and and we have this welcome in our hearts when we crisscross we see doesn't matter whether we're traveling or welcoming people wherever we seem to be there's a rejoicing like there's a coming together it's really in our hearts it's really not in the form but the welcome is there the welcome is so so so strong and why is that important why do we need a sense of of nurturing why do we need a sense of companionship why do we need a sense like we can look each other in the eye and trust each other because we've got the same purpose we're getting our wake up call this is our lifetime to wake up not to dilly dally not to linger behind we're not the dilly dally group this isn't the dilly dally support group this is the wake up support group and the other thing i always appreciate it was jesus i remember when i was reading the course i was like i was praying hoping in the book and getting all these answers but i was saying to jesus i was praying to him give it to me straight give it to me straight i can handle it it's like had benatar songs like singing to the holy spirit hit me with your best shot come on hit me with your best you've got to be able to say that to the holy spirit hit me with your best shot fire away you know and because what because you want the ego one done don't you you want you you don't want to try to molecule a death wish in your mind it's like having a virus in your body you're going i'll put on a pink hat maybe that'll work i think good but the thing about it is wouldn't you want the virus out if you've got you know if you believe it's in you know what i'm saying is is let's take the red pill together you know the matrix analogy let's let's align and say yeah we're going for the awakening because i always said to jesus just give it to me straight just give it to me straight i'll i'll work with you i'm going to be willing i'll do whatever it takes but please just give it to me straight don't sugarcoat it to me and then i remember i opened the course of one day and i was going through and i was at the manual for teachers and it was it was the characteristics of the teachers of god some of you have seen it ten characteristics the first one is trust and then he's got a whole section in there on the stages of the development trust and this is the stages you will probably go through so i looked at and i see there's six stages there so i look at the six to see how many are happy happy happy and how much of them are down four of the six four of the six two-thirds of the stages you'll go through in the spiritual awakening difficult challenging perplexing disorienting hard he throws he's got different words in there but i mean he's telling you that's telling me straight i want it straight i want to know if if i have to go through the dark since the light of four of the six or like that then that tells me i shouldn't be so depressed if i hit one of those buzz songs you know i should go oh here's one of the here's one of the four the last one is great you know you got the last ones you're on the birds you know total transfer of training but you have to go through it one time my friend susan Sullivan she could you summarize spiritual awakening could you summarize the spiritual journey they said yes it's damn damn damn damn ah give it to me straight would you rather have it straight or do you want it dressed up with ribbons and that's the straight talk but the good news is what i was saying is we are mighty companions to each other we cannot be stopped our awakening to who we are is inevitable so why would we delay in this and like the story of the bible you know if you were told there's a treasure in a field and and would you would you be willing to sell all that you have to go to get this treasure in the field that's really what jesus is saying it's like here's the atonement it's your treasure it's your escape from all time and space now are you ready to go for it he says are you ready to help me save the world which is really just accepting your own part and forgiveness that's how you help not going around wearing long robes and hair and standing in the streets and are who's going forgive and you shall be forgiven it's not that it's just accepting your own part in your mind you know your own innocence and it's really important i mean i can't tell you how important it is it's really there's really nothing in this world that's important everything pales so to speak in comparison to atonement and and once you get into the the joy of it you know if you just get a taste of the joy of it you will never look you will never go wandering in the dark again just searching for some scraps of ego comfort to you know hold on until you die that's just a pathetic way to live actually it's pathetic survival and and get some pleasures and and some comforts and then you die why would we why would we go for something so low so low it's just so beneath us really as the christ is actually really beneath us it's it's pathetic so it's like let's let's see that we can rise up out of our chains because they're self-made chains you know the ego we gave power to this ego to try to fool us and convince us that we're tiny and little and we will never be content with with littleness we will never be content with oh just can i have a little more a little symbol today can i have a little a little happiness jesus throw it away get your bucket out get your bathtub out and start filling up your big tubs with love and joy and take that thimble away don't bring that thimble to me you asked for far too little you're entitled to miracles oh i want pension i want i want a boyfriend i want a girlfriend children family i want to live in a nice house the mansion you know it's like throw the thimbles away you know what profit of the man if he gained the whole world and lose his soul think of the ones like musolini and hitler think of napoleon the little guy from france he was on his horse he was gonna try to take over all of europe i once went one time i was doing a gathering now and i was doing a gathering i was in water room i had to climb this big monument all the way up up that chair can now hold you back can i hold your back i was going up waterloo and i was climbing this waterloo memorial i get so playful i got into the museum and they were showing i had to pull in all this all this stuff and this little guy all this horse and everything and i always love history it's so funny to be in european history i'm over here now waterloo and i go up and i could see crop circles from waterloo and i really huffed and puffed to get it you know but when i was in the museum i was with her i said now here here's with this little guy from france decided he was going to take over the world he got all the way after this point in belgium then this english general and this russian general they stopped him so that so he wouldn't get to Sweden so you know that's where she's from so you could be safe enough to amount it's just fun to retell the whole history because all of history is just the same belief that you can separate from god just played out over and over and over in millions of variations and and then it's all subjective so whether you like history or you think history is terrible i think it's hostile you think it's wonderful or whatever it's also objective it's just the meaning you get to it wouldn't that have been great if you went to your history class and the history teacher instead of drawing the timeline and all those different events just said listen it's all subjective it's all subjective you get an A and whatever you think history is is what it is but it's subjective it's not the truth wouldn't that have been been wonderful then you would all be feeling that lightness and that's what we're saying here don't don't even get caught up in what you believe is your personal history your stories what you did wrong all the stuff you've got to carry around that you know that you the things that you should have done you didn't or things that you shouldn't have done you did and all those different kind of things you don't really have to carry that weight and baggage because history itself is a misperception time is not linear time is not linear it's simultaneous it's right here right now yeah okay i'm gonna try to do this okay i'm gonna try to come here like this right there's something coming up a lot you know like when i when i hear you talk i really resonate i hear the truth of it and then when we when it gets into this daily i mean yeah these situations that i perceive you know it's still it's still yeah it confuses me um like yeah there's still practical stuff and um and then i i think how it is in your mind like how uh yeah like you seem to deal with practical stuff still i don't know really if you do but it seems to me you still yeah so i just get confused like how is it in david's mind and then it's like okay he's in my mind really but anyways i just try to really get hold of this practical thing going on while i'm i'm not yeah while it's really eternal right okay that's beautiful that you're just let's share the same mind let's agree to do that because i was talking about this the other day that even if it seems like there's details of logistics what if it was like trinity in the matrix you know that seemed kind of near the end of the matrix when can you fly uh such and such and such helicopter and then not yet but it just takes her just a moment it's like a download and then she can so she must have had the potential in her mind to fly the helicopter and we really have the potential to do anything but you know it's like if god is with me who can be against me if it cannot be difficult jesus says it cannot be difficult to do the test that christ appointed you to do because it is he who does it i love that i was just like first time i read that i was like oh my god i was so concerned about what i'm going to have to do and how am i going to handle all this stuff and how am i going to survive how am i going to live in this world it cannot be difficult to do the test that christ appointed you to do because it is he who does it you see we're back to that involuntary nature the miracles miracles are involuntary and should not be under conscious control that's the fun of it and you can feel the joy of it even if it's like you need to get a flat tire repair or you need to go and get some food or you need to change a diaper or you need to get some money from a bank for somebody who's asking for for money or whatever i mean it's so practical and and what's so great about it is nothing is off limits you know that's what we try to say at these gatherings ask don't be afraid to ask don't be afraid to speak it up don't be afraid you know don't hold on to a sense of i couldn't i shouldn't i need to be able to handle this all my own and everything there was one time when francis and i were in china and francis was having fun rolling her eyes because i've been traveling around the world you know for many many years and i've had thousands of questions asked of me and she would roll her eyes occasionally in this go only in china like i would get asked a question that she'd never heard asked in all those years with all those youtube and obvious and this i was doing a group in china and uh this woman um what's her name suit is it king what's the king's name is it was d dj this woman dj over there she's like i'm feeling lack i'm feeling scarcity that it does she she comes to me and she's i really feel like i have this scarcity that's always with me it's just really intense and there's a lot of tense guilt within everything i need abundance i need abundance and so she's she's in the group and we're waiting to hear the question so she says so she can you give me some money and francis is like all the years all the questions shine only in china did they ask can i have some money it's like going to muji in the middle of sasa can i have some money jesus she got a few coins so the funny thing was i said i'll pray so eventually in the hotel lobby or anything she's the next the next afternoon or whatever she finds me she sees me and so to have this guy to give us some money i never know what's gonna happen it's not my money anyway it's whatever the guy says i got about a week ago she wrote to me again she wants millions she said she must have the same thing this day it's scary to listen what are they called the currency over there yen yeah i forget how many million she said i would i would like david i don't know how many so many million yen you know this will really be helpful it's fun it's fun don't hold back don't hold back anything and and also the practicalities are met i don't know i've been praying but i haven't been deceived any guidance and said why are millions of yen but but the fun part of it is we can nothing there's no harm in asking because as we open up to the spirit we can be playful we can we can relax we can we can ask our questions we can ask for what we feel we need we can ask for what's helpful there's a playfulness with it and and what i'm hearing and telling you is that that the fun for me is that it's just everything is given everything is given so you don't have to spend all this time figuring it out yes figuring it out and working it out there's kim there's a whole group there and okay so all i'm saying is is while you believe in time and while you believe you need to plan while you believe there's things you must do then of course don't feel guilty about any of that but know that you're being taken high to a place where it's inevitable that you'll see that everything is your mind and everything's given but be practical don't deny the things that you really feel strong about if you really feel to do something you know if you really feel to take action on something you feel a strong feeling you know again the guidance of the spirit is helping you unwind from the world and and this body has done many things and many things have come to and from it over these years and i just like to be in the moment of being grateful for the whole thing just grateful for the way that it's played out without trying to analyze it or you know i think that's the part it's really difficult when we try to analyze it and figure it out or just keep judging that we're not enough we're doing something wrong so it's like your experience is that you know it's like you know it's not like it's just like you experience it or not even the dream one yeah it's just being aware that it's a dream so so you don't interpret anything in a fearful way when you're having identification with being a body in a person that's that's fearful like when i go down to third world countries like when i went down to columbia first time i visited columbia they took me out into the row areas and i was going to be staying with these husband and wife and some kids but they had armed gunmen at the airport when i landed there's search dogs and armed there's lots of guns guns everywhere and then like you have bikes here in argus bikes everywhere this was guns everywhere come down i've got guns everywhere i mean then when i go out to stay with my friends that there's like a little post like where this gunman with big guns guarding the place where i'm going to be staying but i'm waiting see they're dream figures to me i'd like to have fun with government you know i like way to become them or sometimes you go to some of these places like changing of the guard and they're all in their very serious part but i find very happy guards in my room but it's because i'm aware that i'm dreamy you see i'm not i don't i don't have a connotation with guns or bikes bikes and guns in the same just dream symbols but you see it's that's the difference it's it's through emptying your mind you know how buddha jesus muji they all tell you empty your mind when you empty your mind of these interpretations and judgments then it's like their dream symbols and they're the same you know and you're the dreamer of it so you it's actually a very playful so you're not telling yourself okay so dream it's like you know you experience is a dream right it's a different way okay it's not an affirmation no oh you're talking i don't have to like it's not like an affirmation yeah it's just it becomes a stronger and stronger experience i don't think i don't feel like it's necessary as we zoom in to this experience together that goes beyond like and dislike beyond facebook this and this you don't have to give your dad this or this or any other figure gestures you know it's we're coming into a place where where i think you can just start to realize more and more that that it wasn't so much that what he seemed to do was thumbs up or thumbs down and then actually needed to be spoken but it's more and more this a feeling like if this whole world is acting out of beliefs then i had this feeling with my biological father at one point because i had grievances with him and at one point it dawned on me that he did the best that he could do based on what he believed and i did the best that i could do based on what i believed that we were actually always doing our best always our best based on what we believe in fact that's how it had to work out because he believes certain things about about what a son should be what a son should do what a son should achieve to have meaning and importance and i had beliefs about what a father should be now a father should nurture and how a father should communicate and this and this and this and the actions the way we interacted it got a little testy at frequently but it was all based on these beliefs so one day my biological father came to me and he just he had this look of sadness in his eye and he just looked at me and he looked me right in the eye and he said Dave i haven't been a very good and what came out of me was nonsense that's nonsense it just rose up i said to him you did the best that you could do as a father i did the best that i could do as a son and we don't have to think that way anymore we don't have to lock down into these roles you should have been there for me you should have done more you should have helped me you shouldn't have yelled at me all those things that i've projected onto him all those things he projected onto me i said it's done we don't have to think like that anymore it's nonsense and you know it was amazing how our relationship changed after that we were like buddies we became buddies we never were buddies but we became buddies when i took him off the hook then i took myself off the hook too and we both lit up and all the way from that point until he passed passed from the service you know it it had a light feel to it we were like we were like happy buddies together there was even one point when he was going to they were he had been diagnosed with um bipolar and kind of that the family was upset with them and so on and so forth and he was sitting next to me after we had this free experience and we were side by side he said he looked at me and he said you know they want to lock me up they want to institutionalize me they want to put me back in the institution and they want to give me drugs and everything and smile to look at him with just innocence and he went yeah even that couldn't stop me from the feeling i'm having he totally was empowered even if he was given drugs and institutionalized he had this look at his eye like they can't take the love away from me nothing the moment of invulnerability he said he just smiled he said yeah it's gonna they're gonna do what they're gonna do he just resigned thinking that somehow the world would control his state of mind and we could just sit there and relax and chuckle we had to chuckle none of this we didn't know what would happen but we could we could just chuckle together we could laugh together so yeah i don't really feel like it's this thing that that has to be spoken to his face it's more you just have to see you did the best that you could and so did he take yourself off the hook take him off the hook there's really no point in hanging people on hooks you know and these hooks of expectations you know it's just heavy it's just no fun at all yeah i mean it did start with with him saying that he didn't think he was a very good father what was his expression and just was i was in a state of mind where i just felt so much love just well up inside of me that's why i said that's nonsense but but yeah it's it's okay it's just that i think we come to a point where we start to realize it's the spirit's gonna do it through us yeah we're not we're not trapped okay i was just waited patiently with this yeah because we have to take me down to some basic um because i'm kind of really new because i heard about the bible i heard about Jesus and i like the figure and i like i i know something to talk about but i'm questioning what is going to happen when we or Jesus is going to wake up and what is scarred and Jesus going to do mean they're going to get bored i mean what is the whole concept i mean this is kind of perfect we have so much love here to give and we're talking about another illusion another world or what that's just very confused because it's like a dream and a dream and then we have to really focus on what we believe and then it's everything's all right because Jesus is doing it for us so i really get confused now yeah please give me some direction yeah it's it's this thing that it seems like in this world everything is an event it's a happening it's occurrence there's all these people there's all these actions there's all these things that happen and there's all these judgments it's that's just the human condition and it seems like Jesus is just like a symbol of one of us so to speak of the human condition that found out that this really wasn't our home you know he just discovered that this isn't it that and and i think for most of us um we've had a hunch about that like there must be there must be something more we don't know what it is but we think there's something more than this maybe we just hope there is i hope there's something more than this so he did a lot of teaching in the bible about the kingdom of heaven and he says not of this world and we're being called out of this world and very much speaking about this heavenly kingdom but it's not it's not a place it's not a location and it's not even in time it's it's eternal but here's that word eternal we don't even know what that is in this world you know nothing's eternal we are we study the cosmos we see that the stars these beautiful stars most of them we see have already burned out we're just seeing light it seems to be coming to our eyes from long ago but but the nature is so beautiful what is that part of the tree yeah even even what seems to be beautiful in this world you know as an opposite so we'll call it beautiful and ugly we might say the nature the trees the mountains the rivers and so forth the animals and so forth then we have like dumps city dumps and landfills and garbage piles and so on and so forth this is a world of opposites and the opposites are part of the trick so at times all we try to do as human beings is we try to give ourselves more experiences of the same way I spent as much time as I could out in nature because I enjoyed nature more than cities more than civilization I really felt to get away I go off in hermitages I lived in nature lived with the bugs and grew food and lived close to the land and all this and this and I did that as part of my journey but there came a point where I started to realize that I wanted to be happy consistently and that if I was happy based on circumstances like moving my body certain places or whatever that it was always circumstance dependence like even if you have a beautiful you're living in nature and a verge of chirping and grouting you feel harmony with everything that it's if a person comes along or someone comes along and you feel you lose your peace then I'm interested in how did I lose my peace why could it be taken away so fast? Kirsten had a couple of head injuries where she she felt so sensitized that when planes were even she would living in one of the most beautiful countries like New Zealand the South Island where they shot Lord of the Rings you know and which is mystical and looks you know just amazing down there but when planes would even fly by that the sound of the planes you know in fact when I was in New Zealand New Zealand such a beautiful place as a world judge is that when I would go around and do these course of miracles gatherings I would talk to the people and I would say wow this is kind of like an idyllic like just like an ideal place on the planet to live how are things going and they said well we've got a big problem with I was waiting to see what road rage I said road rage you know people on the road driving getting really angry and smashing in other cars there's so it's so great there in New Zealand that's what their problems are road rage the unconscious rage that's in the mind comes out in road rage not always you don't hear that a lot of places on the planet they it's projected on to many other things but this was road rage so you do start to get a sense that there's something beyond the opposites and that you really want to discover that something to be happy or you know how they say beauty is in the eye of the beholder wouldn't it be great if you could reach a state of mind where everything was beautiful absolutely everything without exception well I know the feeling of I know I mean I know the truth about that the beauty comes from the inside so I understand that in heaven the student has to be a place that that's something I wanted to hold on because it's like because I have a love for this planet or a distribution you know maybe I didn't have a view of the poor and I didn't have a view of the poor and I didn't have a here but yeah it's just hard for me to say to to to to believe there is a better place yeah it's good I would say there really isn't a better place but and the spirit works with you like if you're starting to feel this love for the planet or for earth will say the spirit works with that the spirit's like let's take that and let's grow that let's expand that let's have your heart just burst open in that love just like I said like I had a love for my biological family I felt so much gratitude and so much appreciation for them and really it wasn't about pushing them away or letting them go or saying no you're not my family I've never gone to my biological family and say you are all pure illusions you know it's not it doesn't come that way at all it's more like the love just grows stronger and stronger and stronger as you go on this journey the spirit it just grows absolutely unlimited is what it is and and we had we're here now but we actually started off here it was a friday night uh francis and I went to uh give a talk at the church and when that was the night when you just I just looked over to francis and she just said her eyes got all teary and she couldn't speak the love was so overwhelming some of you might word for there she just sat there and she just got tears in her eyes but she was speechless the love was so strong the love in her heart and that's the way it goes it's not it's not like we have to figure out this illusion stuff it's more like you you give yourself so fully over to this love and that's what kirsten loves so much about all these gatherings she just loves showing up and telling people over and over and over how loved they are in one of ones and gatherings you know that's her life now she just that's she just shows up and that thing that francis had it was just the love just it just overtook her it was so big that the words there was no words for it so there really is nothing to figure out with any of this we're just kind of tuning in we're attuning to the presence of love in a much deeper way and it's it it's really given like choosing for the spirit is the is the only thing that you could really do you know even the question like how do you see it as dream it's not it's it's just an experience that comes through a transformation from turning to the spirit more rather than to myself to to know the answers so with the turning to the spirit you show me you guide me you just want to feel that connection more and more the direction for our thinking and our focus is on an experience and a connection with the spirit rather than using the world as the reference point like i want to go there because i i'm responsible for handling something in the world it's more if you notice that or i want to go there because i love going there because i love nature you know it's it's just and it may be that you are to go there and be in nature but it's just with with each direction or each day each moment it's it's practicing with turning to the spirit is this where you would have me though and so we're just more and more the focus comes off the world and it gets softer the focus on the world somehow gets softer and softer and softer and our dependence on it gets softer and softer and the dependence is just the turning turning to a different reference point and the forgiveness is is how the mind gets softened from the world too like each each time you bring like a heartache or a grievance or some you know experience to the spirit to release the forgiveness the mind's grip on the world and who it thinks it you know who i think i am and what i think i've done is being softened as well we are not the ego so you have your spirit we are spirit and and to the extent that we identify with the body the personality that's what the ego is yeah that's an misidentification and thank you thank you ocean i had a time one time back in 2003 where i was on a trip and i i hadn't really gone overseas at all and and i met this man named david who wanted me to go overseas and just start traveling all over the world and i just i said i have no thought about it all and then he kept persisting and he's he won this big all these airpoints frequent flower points and i will fly you there and himself and two friends and all this stuff started to happen and i do remember i went down there and i was in such joy to to be just sharing and extending my heart down in Buenos Aires that i had to go to these 19 days all these travels through taxi it was very hot in the summertime and the windows were down and i remember one particular day i was being driven to go share my heart at one of these gatherings it was just exploding with love i was just sitting in the front seat having this wonderful connection with the cab driver the car had no air conditioning so the windows were rolled down we're in a city of 15 million people and one of those big buses that come you know they have the side exhaust not the top exhaust it blows up black soot out of buses not the top of the side it came over and i was looking at the cab driver and i was just in so much joy and i remember and then i turned and all this black soot from a bus came around on my face and i was just i was just so happy i just never i just was even with the black a looted soot in the heat hitting my face just because it was all the same the taxi driver i was so happy to be there i was shining my life i was in my joy i couldn't imagine anything else more happy you know just was i was in it it's not it wasn't a nature experience unless you consider the blacks exhaust but it was even i just noticed how much joy i was in when the soot was hitting my face in the heat and i thought well yeah this is this is what miracle is it that it's not circumstance dependent that wouldn't have been a circumstance i wouldn't believe to be joyful but i wasn't i wasn't circumstance dependent the joy was just was who i was it's who everything was it was just i was so grateful to be in purpose and that's just continued you know that just continued on and on and i think that that's all we're saying is your heart just gets so bursting with love and gratitude and joy that the circumstances really don't have any influence at all they just they don't really matter they don't matter about yeah it's like the purpose gets stronger and stronger and the purpose is is love it's the connection with the spirit that comes through all of this forgiveness and mind training that that we're doing and that purpose of just the spirit the spirit the spirit relationship with god that's the purpose and that just becomes so like your heart just gets so full of it that everywhere you go you just feel the spirit you see reflections in the spirit that's rare that you know the inner beauty or inner joy just ends up being all that you see and you really go but it's different to that like oh i love something in the world but it could go wrong you know it's it's doesn't have the the possibility of the rough being pulled out from underneath it because it's just it is the purpose and in the end that's what is the only thing where they can be consistent the only thing that can be consistent and that's why it's so precious why you know this gratitude just ends up feeling so full it's a God yeah it's it doesn't depend on the witnesses but the witnesses are there it reminds me jason told me this story one time that he was driving down through Cincinnati on the highway he came across into Kentucky and there was an automobile accident some smash up of automobiles and actually he he was in such he was driving his car and he was feeling such joy and happiness and contentment and the state patrol officer uh that was moving the out directing the traffic as jason drove by the state patrol officer just gave him the biggest smile and just waved and i had those kind of outer pattern experiences so many times where it's like there's a dream picture just going isn't this wonderful it's like he's directing traffic and a car pile up and he's like like this and i had another friend to mine lisa who one day she she's so intimate she was so high so miracle minded that she was driving her car in this town of pennsylvania and she came to a stop had like a traffic line or something and she was just in this high high high state of mind the miracle state of mind and all of a sudden she heard what she thought was an explosion like the building the buildings around her sounded like she's she's kept hearing a succession of explosions and she was just in her car just looking looking around and she was looking looking she she was just really high and it turns out that the buildings were not exploding the traffic lights were not exploding it was cars hitting her car it was a pile up she was in the middle of a pile up of cars her car got the car crashed behind her but it came it all the way up and it put on the brakes but but it stopped right short of her car so she she didn't go flying or anything it was just then the car behind went boom and then the next one boom then the next one boom so there's like seven car pile up and she's just in the state of happiness so you got no lisa so she gets she still doesn't know what she didn't realize that the cars had piled up till she got out looking at the building thinking the buildings were exploding she looked back and the six seven cars piled up she's like looking and she's still in the miraculous state so people start to get out of their cars and one lady comes up to her and is just like distraught and lisa goes it's her first thing out of her mouth it's a miracle that she's just it bent apart of like a seven car pile up and the first thing out of her mouth is it's a miracle to the person walking up and the woman was like was like staggered like and then lisa goes no it's really a miracle this is a miracle it's all god it's all god she's just in having this revelatory experience and it's a pile up and this woman goes and she and lisa goes it's all our thoughts it's all our thoughts man we're just doing this oh it's we're thinking all the time it's just our thoughts it's so wonderful and the woman goes you're right she said i was just having this discussion with my husband five minutes ago and i was saying to him why can't i take the good part why do i have to drive this chunky heap all the time i don't want to be driving this heap and this was the first weakness that the lisa got and then the others got out and then they all came and there's so much giggling and laughter from all these people that got out of their cars they were all swept up in the miracle literally swept up and here they are all laughing then the police show up and you got to imagine how it looks when the police come and see a seventh car pile up and a bunch of people just laughing hilarious hysterically the cops coming up like what's going on here to see how out of pattern it is but you see also how it's a state of mind it's not that's not circumstance dependent that would not be the kind of circumstance that you would think of being a miracle it's supposed to be like a tragedy that's why they call it an accident they don't they wouldn't say that that's just a quantum collection of thoughts in which cars were supposed to be let go of which is what what it seemed to be playing out so that's what we're saying you know really your mind is that powerful your mind gives everything the meaning and you don't have to do that anymore and it's still practical i find everything in my life is practical it's not like it's not like we just go um um um and or meditate whole day we don't if you follow us around we're quite active quite happy and we opened up his introduction saying i've got the best job that he's just part of it yeah i just i said a couple of other gatherings that the first time i saw David what really convinced me to you know to give everything to this path isn't a metaphysics analysis on how we're in a brain that we're in the ego under the ego is what he said in the gathering that i haven't had a bad day for 20 years to me i was like is that even possible for human condition you have good days and you have bad days and you set up goals and when you achieve your goals you're happy right and that's that's the condition in my mind is like accepted that you will have good and bad it's accepted there's nothing wrong with it but what he was pointing to is a deeper calling that i have is can can that ever be that i have i'm gonna be always happy there's never gonna be a bad day there's never gonna be a problem there's never gonna be an upset there's never gonna be a suffering there's never gonna be any kind of ugliness or suffering that's even outside of me that's been perceived ever possible and he is basically just with such a confidence saying it is possible and i'm doing it and right now what we're here to say is it is possible it's not necessarily just a theory in the book that you have to grasp as a concept and talk about that's true love and then all will be good no we just don't know what it takes that's that's really all this talk is about like to to say that we won't happen there is no doubt that's our one desire for every everyone we just do not know what it takes what it takes is the whole belief system that the world is built on that we are questioning the whole thought system and that is really what it takes to come back to this our true nature as the spirit and that's the only way we can be truly happy is to see who we truly are as a spirit there is really no other way we can be happy there is no other way that we can see beauty and be satisfied with it the only way is what we're saying is this one solution to all problem is to realize we're the spirit and i really remember when i first came to the monastery i had such a difficulty in accepting this following the guidance thing and i just keep talking the metaphysics of the course and saying that the spirit doesn't know this world this it doesn't matter what you're doing this world why do you have to follow guidance it just doesn't make any sense to to my mind and i do not know how to follow something i don't even understand because and then jason and remember we're just having a discussion and he was telling me something that he in his experience and that he keeps asking so what then what if i keep following them what so what and then in the end he said after many many of my questions he said then you realize you are the spirit not someone else guiding you in the end the experience is going to be you are the spirit that's a good answer that i can give you a try if that's in the end i don't i still don't feel that i can be happy if there is an outside power that that knows it all and that's guiding me and i'm just small thing that i need to find the answer but that is actually the experience that i after all these years and i can just say it is the experience and that's the only experience that can bring us happiness is to completely identify with the spirit ourselves and it's possible it's just very very practical as well we just do not hide anything and protect anything in our thoughts let it all come up and keep just following the the practical steps in every following it's part of the mind is washed clean and in the end this is the goal it's not intellectual understanding about the course at all yeah you actually have to forget the course it kind of jesus comes right out that says that in his verbal lesson what are you trying to forget this world forget this course so isn't that beautiful too don't you love that and teaching is almost like a self-destructing teaching that you know like like that mission possible thing if you choose to do it and then the tape just goes up and look this we're not dependent on the book it's not a book that's telling us to be dependent on a book it's telling us our use for words is almost over as we go through it isn't that wonderful that it's not saying it's the only pathway to god it's just saying it's one among many and then it's saying forget this now too forget forget your theology you have to let go of your theology and so if i show up and words seem to come and words come from many of us if they're just coming from joy you know it's i don't select these words i don't know what words are coming it's coming from a state of mind words beyond the words and we don't have to be dependent