 For this world is the opposite of heaven being made to be its opposite, and everything here takes the direction exactly opposite of what is truth. In heaven, where the meaning of love is known, love is the same as union. Here, where the illusion of love is accepted in love's place, love is perceived as separation and exclusion. And again, there could be no better example of that than the special love relationship. We were talking about that today, that exclusive element. I mean, even since we were starting to get into this afternoon a little bit of monogamy, and certainly monogamy is in marriage as it's known in this world, is certainly a very helpful stepping stone. A lot of times that involves hanging in there together with your learning partner through the ups and downs, with the thick and thin, and sticking with it instead of just blowing it off and saying, hey, I'll find something better and then breaking off again. And again, the high divorce rate would even show that the mind is not, even though this mutual attraction and this seeming exclusivity seems to be hard to maintain, it still doesn't even approach what we're coming to talk about as union, which is union in heaven. So the key thing for me has been the role model for the top-of-the-line relationship in this world, the ones that I've seen in the movies all those years, you know, where they go through stuff in movies, but they end up in each other's arms, husband and wife, and then they have a big heart that comes on, or the end comes on. We're going to take a look at the exclusion that's part of the ideal relationship that this world holds out. I remember watching a movie one time, Venice Venice, a filmmaker, Henry Jaglin, who loves to use his films just for the purpose of exploring relationships. And he comes out of them all angles. And one of them, this was a fairly recent film where he just had a videotape and he would have people come in, men and women, and would come in and sit down in front of the camera and just tell what they thought the relationship was all about, what they were looking for. And some of them said, oh, Cary Grant and, you know, they went through, a lot of them, it was related to the movies. They would talk about these, those were their images of love, you know, and they went on and on and on. And also the disillusionment of, my life is never done that way. I had this image in my mind of what the ideal relationship would be like, but I've never found it. I've had a lot to come and see through everything. And, of course, no one ever finds, no one ever reaches the ideal because it's a scam. The ideal relationship that's held up in this world is an illusion, just the end of love. It's a substitute for life eternal. And there's no way in the world that it could measure up, substitute or live up to the billing of being a substitute for life eternal. So that's why people call it codependency. They call it, you know, dissatisfaction, restlessness. All this content with relationship, always seeking to find Mr. Right or Ms. Right, always seeking to find that right partner. Some of the more sophisticated spiritual paths will talk about how there's twin flame. You know, there you go, soulmate. And another one, you know, it's really just belief that there is my soulmate waiting out for me, but he or she's just around the corner. And I'm not going to give up the quest for that, looking for that. And what the Course is saying is that every relationship that you perceive yourself having, every relationship can be used, can be given over to the Holy Spirit. And you can be totally committed to everyone equally. That every relationship you have is a total commitment. Well, that flies in the face of this ideal that we're talking about, you know, the ideal is kind of saying, you're lucky if you can find one that you can be totally committed to, till death do you part. And Jesus is saying, no, no, that's the scam. You want to come to a place where you are totally committed to everyone without interfering. In other words, without there being conflict between that. I want a total commitment with my spouse and the mailman. Well, it seems you've got to be kidding. Well, I want a total committed relationship with the mailman. For any relationship. I mean, even take out committed a lot of times. Like, why would I, you know, why would I want to even talk about a relationship at all with my mailman? That's my mind's energy. With a woman who's behind the cash register at the grocery store, I may never see her again. And again, if it seems like a stretch, we just have to go back to what the Course says. A quote from the Course would be, under the Holy Spirit's teaching, every relationship is being as a total commitment. So again, it's the Holy Spirit's teaching that's going to bring us to that kind of a new healed perception. It's not thinking, it's not even trying to say, well, I don't perceive it that way. And in fact, I can't even imagine it that way. And I don't even think that it's possible, but it's just being open and willing to say, Holy Spirit, it sounds very different. But I'm willing to move in that direction. I'm willing to have you enter all my relatives and to heal them. Again, it's that I don't know, isn't it? Like, I really don't know what relationship is. I really don't know what love is. So, show me. I have much to be shown. Or I could just feel the resistance of people hear this and they say, like, I'm not even making one relationship work. What makes you? Much less across the board. And that's the good news. It's kind of like, yes, you never have been able to make one relationship work. So, these kinds of things, maybe that's not it. Maybe there's another way. I don't think that ego believes in commitment at all, because it seems to me that even when we talk about that one relationship, that seems to be the biggest thing that comes up among discussion and things to read and stuff. That's the hardest thing, is to even commit to one. Right, this world. Yeah, that ego doesn't even think in terms of total commitment anywhere. I mean, you know, it's like, to anything or in any respect. Yeah, where somebody recently was just saying, you know, they didn't even get the word out, you know, it's like, commitment. It's basically, at one point in the course, it says the ego doesn't believe, doesn't want any one whole person. It breaks it apart, and it wants special parts and aspects. You see, that's how it makes the world to its own capricious liking, where it says, well, I really like being with someone so far, they're lively personalities. But, I don't like this about them, so I see them every once in a while, or maybe I like some of them, because they're a really good tennis player, and I like tennis. And I don't know if any other people that can play tennis that well. So, it's really important. I mean, that's why I meant if you maintain that relationship, this is it. And, well, my ex-husband, he didn't meet my name, he didn't do this and this, but, you know, he still supplies me with some money. And so, or maybe even a recurrent husband, or recurrent wife, they still give me money. And I like that security of the house and the money. So, I'll just hang with that. But I'm going to go out and have affairs, or I'm going to go out or go out with my best girlfriend and my best boy buddy, you know, and spend more time. I'm not going to spend a lot of time around it. I like the security, but as far as when it comes to personality, whether it's thinking in the mud or whether it did beat, you know, I'm going to go out here and find that. And that's what the ego does with the relationship. It's just a simple reality to its own liking. And it just takes the parts and picks and chooses based on what it wants. But it seems like no matter who you find, there's always something that you can find a change about, even that best of friend. Yeah. Or that best of relationship. So, something lively. Yeah. I mean, hasn't psychology even said that you, I don't know what the number is. You have to have four people in your life or something at least to fulfill all your needs. You can't expect your, you know, your spouse or your significant other to fulfill all your needs. You need at least four people to take care of those. So, you kind of spread it around. You know, it's like what David was describing. You get something from this one and something from that one. And these needs take care of here and these needs take care of here. And if you have enough of the right people, the right combination, then you get all your needs supplied. Magic, please. I don't want to tell your spouse that. You need to do it. Well, it's not, it's, it's not the case anyway. I understand. And the thing too of just, you know, the old thing about how instruction workers watching the girls go by whistling and this and that and all the comments, you know, ooh, I'm a leg man or I look at this, I look at, you know, all those comments about the body, it's just another symbol of breaking everything apart and saying, well, I like this better than that. Or what are you looking for? I like redheads. I like blondes. You know, how many times have we heard that? Just a night. Or, you know, different. It could be male, female, it doesn't matter. There's still a lot of that breaking apart that goes into the physical. Then you get into the intellectual parts too, like, well, if they only had a brain to go with that body, then they'd really be a catch or stuff like that, you know, it's still the same thing, just breaking apart. So if it's not that then... What is it? What is it here? In heaven where the meaning of love is known, love is the same as union. Here where the illusion of love is accepted in love's place, love is perceived as separation and exclusion. It is in the special relationship born of the hidden wish for special love from God that the ego's hatred triumphs. For the special relationship is the renunciation of the love of God and the attempts to secure for the self the specialness that he denies. So again, we're back to those dynamics. The ego says to the mind, you're out of heaven. You pulled away. You're obviously not in heaven anymore and so you might as well go for it here and you can make up for it and you can make your own kingdom. You can come up with a pretty good substitute for heaven since you can't have the real thing. And it also teaches that the specialness that he denied the specialness that God denied in other words, the ego asked God for special favor and said, just give me the kingdom. Just give me this new kingdom I've made up. Just acknowledge it. Please. Please acknowledge it. And of course, God is not going to acknowledge the world of fragmentation. Separation. Yeah. Religions have even talked about how there's going to be a judgment day coming where God gets part of waiting and says, oh, right. That's enough of that. Kind of like a parent who sits back patiently with the child with the child doing things. Counts to ten. Counts to ten. Maybe another ten. Here I come, you know. I've had all I can take. And at one point the Course says in that sense, what's the world apart? You know, relegates the evil to hell, so to speak, and takes the good back to himself. Of course, that would make the world real. He would come into the world and do that in an impatient rage. And basically he said the ego is just kind of waiting for acknowledgement from God. For God to acknowledge it's made up kingdom. And so basically the ego says ah, you see, God has denied you your specialness. So again, he gets projected out and gets blamed on God. God wasn't denying me the special favor that I'd be happy with. That's not the way happiness is ever found. It is essential to the preservation of the ego that you believe this specialness is not hell but heaven where the ego would never have you see that the separation could only be lost being the one condition in which heaven could not be found or could not be. It reminds me of a workbook lesson where Jesus says if guilt is hell what is its opposite? Kind of opens up with that. If guilt is hell what is its opposite? And then his next sentence is the hesitation you feel is what is it for? He says it's a pretty simple question. If guilt is hell what is its opposite? He says the hesitation that you feel in answering is because you don't believe that guilt is hell. And again, it gets into this specialness that we're talking about. Some of the world seems attractive. And yet, it's