 Leaning into lust is great. I mean, that's a fun part of dating. Dating is hard enough so we don't have to get rid of the parts that feel good and feel very exciting. There's so much uncertainty and discomfort in dating. So if that's a part that you enjoy, I think enjoy it, but sort of with moderation. AJ, I know you talk a lot about social anxiety and being introverted and I'm in 100% the same boat. And I think people expect too much of a first encounter. I think we need to slow down. Like in my opinion, I think the most interesting people take a long time to get to know and we don't know based on a first meeting whether or not somebody will be a long-term fit for us. And I'll just share a personal story that I met my husband in grad school and I thought he was boring and not that interesting. And we were friends for like two years before I thought, oh no, I actually think he's kind of a cool person. So my recommendation is like slow it down and if you can maybe take some of the pressure off of the romantic piece and just see it as an opportunity to really get to know people with an openness to the romantic connection. Because I do think that the pressure that we put on ourselves on the romantic side of things can really interfere. And I mean, the analogy that I can very naturally use is the analogy with sex. Like we get so focused on the outcome of like having an orgasm that we are not in the space of being intimate, touching the journey towards the orgasm. And there's nothing that kills an orgasm more quickly than feeling like you need to get there. And the same thing goes with the dating analogously, right? If we're still focused on making a love match that's gonna be a permanent marriage, long-term commitment with family and the white picket fence, then we sort of miss out on the journey and it makes it that much harder to get to the endpoint that we're so much longing for. And so the biggest trick that we can use for ourselves is to really hold that outcome lightly and bring ourselves back to the process of just getting to know people, showing up as our best selves, being curious about who they are and what's interesting about them. And when we do that, we really increase our chances to get towards that outcome. I mean, we don't guarantee it, but there are no guarantees. So it's sort of six of one half dozen of the other anyway. I love that. I wanna add to that. For those people who are going to meet this person for the first time, before you go on this date, you get this match, maybe you've texted back and forth, you're gonna feel compelled to do a little research on this person. You're gonna wanna go through their social media. You're gonna wanna find things that you have in common so you can talk about these things. So you're armed to the teeth with material on this date so you can fill up all that space. Please do not do that. And I will tell you why, because you will feel compelled to shift the conversation into areas that you feel most informed about. That doesn't mean that that other person is willing or wanting to talk about those things because you saw them on their social media. You have no context to why they had posted any of those things. And what you will find yourself doing is rather than being present and in the moment and focused on the other person because that's where all the answers are. You're trying to drive the conversation into areas will feel forced for the other person and there won't be a mutual contribution to those moments. The best thing you can do for each other is to, as you were mentioning, try to meet as soon as possible after chatting a little while, but go in to learning about that other person, being curious, being excited to meet them. Think of it as you're going to a movie. It's pure entertainment. You get this opportunity to meet this person. It could be crazy. It could be awesome. It could be terrible. Just like you're going to a movie. The reason you go to a movie is for the entertainment. Entertainment doesn't mean that you liked it. Entertainment means that you were entertained. You now have an opportunity to pan it, to enjoy it, any of those things. And you should go through your first date with that sort of headspace of I'm going out to see if this is cool or not. Don't go see a movie with a thought of, I hope there's an orgasm at the end because you'll never be led into that cinema again. Well, there are some cinemas where that would be OK, but... This dynamic that then unfolds and overrides our curiosity is lost. We become physically attracted. We chase the orgasm. We chase the physicality. And then we run the risk of overlooking some red flags. And I think those who have a healthy dating life and have options, one of the big struggles they have is really identifying, you know, what is that green flag for me? And then what are these red flags when lust and physical attraction and chemistry are overriding those core values or those things that really matter to us? So in our audience, I'm certain many members find themselves in this lust phase of enjoying the physical side of these apps and the way that we can meet people in person. But how can we start to look beyond just lust and really sort through our options in a meaningful way to find the green flags and the red flags that are presented? Leaning into lust is great. I mean, that's a fun part of dating. Dating is hard enough so we don't have to get rid of the parts that feel good and feel very exciting. There's so much uncertainty and discomfort in dating. So if that's a part that you enjoy, I think enjoy it, but sort of with moderation and recognizing that passionate love is time limited in general. And we can talk about sort of how to keep passion alive because that's something that researchers have gotten very interested in and I think is a very important topic as well. But in general, over time, that lust fades into something very beautiful which is called companion at love which is more the friendship, the trust, the commitment. And we want both sides, but in the beginning of most relationships, the passionate love is stronger and in the latter part of most relationships, the companion at part is stronger. And so I think recognizing that helps you to contextualize that like the lust feeling is high in the beginning, but I wanna make sure that there's more to this relationship than just that. And so kind of taking a step back, sort of getting the bird's eye view of like, okay, this is a part that I wanna enjoy, but I also wanna kind of turn towards this idea that I want to be building a relationship assuming that your value is to be building a longer-term relationship, that I wanna keep an eye out towards, is this somebody that I can build a more long-term relationship with? Do we have values that align? Do we have similar goals? Do I find him or her interesting? Do I respect this person? Do I imagine that we could have fun doing lots of different things over the course of our life together. And so to be asking yourself these sort of, again, like value clarifying kinds of questions to be able to kind of take that perspective on, lust is one part of it, that physical connection is one part of a healthy romantic relationship, but let's not drop into believing that it is all of it. And it is challenging because what we also know from brain research is that in the beginning of a relationship, that lust part is like, it's like a drug, like we feel that excitement and that desire and it feels really good and it can feel really all-consuming. And so the skill is to be able to kind of take a step back from that and just, again, see it in context as part of the bigger picture of the relationship that you're hoping to build. And I think many of us enter relationships wearing a bit of a mask, putting our best foot forward, only showcasing our highlight reel even on those dates, only picking things that we're really excited to do and we want to make a great impression. We want to create that attraction and oftentimes in doing so, we end up giving this potential partner only one perspective of who we are and then inevitably conflict comes up, the mask slips a little bit and they start to see what those core values are or what those beliefs you have are that aren't necessary in alignment with one another. And oftentimes that can be jarring when we're in that lust phase, when we're feeling really physically drawn to this person but now realizing like, oh, maybe there are some red flags here, maybe this isn't the person that I could handle conflict well with or I could see myself doing other experiences with.