 feminism versus misanji a lot of people are getting it all wrong the fact that we get a lot of people complain about these people that call themselves feminists is a good thing I'll tell you why we've gotten noticed and have built a presence a presence that is going to last a long long time feminism, true feminism, is the belief in an advocacy of the political, economic and social equality of the sexes expressed especially through organized activity on behalf of women's rights and interests according to Miriam Webster dictionary this means that a feminist is someone who believes that women and girls have every right to hold political, economic and high social positions without any oppression from the opposite sex lately it seems to me that we have misandrists hiding under the feminist banner there are normal people like you and me and are everywhere misandrists hate men and boys in general misandri could be belittling, being violent and completely excluding yourself from any activity involving men here in Nigeria we may not have come across such offensive comments but we see it in their actions the thing is that a lot of people are misandrists without even knowing it some just don't want to believe or even admit it think about the times you were in school as a little girl and objected from participating in extracurricular activities with boys or worse, holding hands that's how long misandry has been living amongst us feminism is all about empowering about women supporting women and girls supporting girls to a just cause building one another up for the seeable future why have I brought this up it's about time that we lay down on the table we've got quite a number of them that look at us feminists as misandrists they take a part of the blame for being ignorant and not sourcing for knowledge regardless of the sex if you believe that women and girls have every right to hold exclusive positions as men in all fields you are a feminist yes, you are a feminist are you a feminist you wouldn't as a man deny your wife, sister, mother or friend a position that you are entitled to with you so are we all feminists no I'm not I'm a human being I think for me that has always been my issue with the tagging there's always when it comes to women issues we tend to want to label things we're human beings we should look more at these issues from the lens of human beings if a man is a human being a woman is a human being so if a human is entitled to go and work and earn 5000 naira then it has nothing to do with the sex it's a human being, you are entitled to work number two feminism got a bad name from the people practicing it because today's first I'm hearing of me is today I'm hearing it because feminism carried all of it because of the people who were behind it it's now that feminism is better defined because they needed to step out and make it clear we don't let men know it's just the way we have been shouting and doing it it's not we have been very aggressive so we'll be lady like about it but now presenting the issues going forward number three the one about holding hands it's not because we were Miss Andrews we were practicing it we were young they said if we touch boys we'll get pregnant we had nothing to do with it we didn't know what it was we were supposed to be till we go to a certain stage also what I'm just saying is that I think going forward now that thankfully feminism is beginning to bring itself out as look it's economic, social the general well-being of women in relation to all these factors it's clear it's not that we hate men or we're aggressive or we don't want them or whatever but we want to make sure that we're heard I think there should be the emphasis also on the fact that we're human first absolutely, yeah human first absolutely and you know yes in an ideal world in utopia yes we're humans but the reality today is no we're not right so the women don't have the rights that they should have so you'd expect that somebody is thinking extra and saying I mean I have two daughters I have a wife I'm already outnumbered right so whether I like or not I'm a feminist but beyond that, beyond the labelling like Comfort said is what is the spirit behind it what is the objective what are we trying to achieve with the whole idea of feminism is equality right it's saying if a man deserves 200 naira then a woman deserves just as much a woman doesn't deserve 199 once is one naira shot someone needs to say what's going on here that's basically the spirit behind it and once it crosses that it becomes abuse right so it's just achieving a critical balance between understanding the objective and the outcome you want to you want to get versus when you now cross the line and then it becomes something else and you're easy to not label you and say oh then throw it with the baby with the bath water I think what has caused the reason for the clear distinction is that they found out or feminists found out that they had become the same thing they were fighting and that has shown clearly and you know in that kind of world man had already started becoming an individual species because they seem to take it to be a undead lion takes things more personal so they seem to take it to another level but like Comfort said also I have always called myself a humanist I believe everybody deserves the best of opportunities they get in that tribe religion I even always say governance is not based on gender tribal religion so I don't look at it anyway a lot of people have grown to see things differently when there are people that once they just read a story and I've seen this occur on social media once they read a story they don't even want to know the other side of the story if it's a woman they are behind the woman if it's a man they are behind the man they don't want to know how else it occurred and you know this is creating more and we are becoming a more a lot of people think we are more intelligent now as a generation trust me we are far becoming more unintelligent than the generations the 14th and 15th century people because we have so much information but have value for nothing for me I think the issue of feminism has been misinterpreted you know the initial ideology behind feminism was equality inclusion for women women should be involved in every other thing that the men do but I think there has been I think the way the message has been passed has been passed wrongly on certain issues like for instance there was a story on Twitter about a lady who said she bought a house for a husband so there are a lot of comments like why would you buy a house for your man before we could say anything everything just went in different ways all the ladies came out to say why would she why would you why would you do such a thing what if he cheats what if he leaves you why would you buy is this women supporting women has also been misinterpreted because a lot of women would also if a woman does something wrong a lot of people say okay because she is a woman and I need to support my fellow woman I wouldn't scold her so I think the issue has been but it's a very good ideology especially if we are looking at it in terms of the workplace where you see some organizations I think things are changing now a lot of companies would rather employ a man than a woman but things are much different now I see a lot of women also taking up very good roles in companies becoming like now virtually all the banks have female CEOs virtually all the banks are I'm not sure I think that's important as well I've conducted a lot of interviews I find when I ask the men what they want to earn they just go straight and I want to earn this a lot of times they are less and I say what is wrong with you I do get the question right there tell me what you want to earn I don't tell the guy that you come out to earn but you are here shrinking when it comes to your value and your worth as far as money is concerned so you have to also do that education every now and then and having to tell people this is not time to shrink you have the opportunity the truth about I believe that between the sexes there could be equality I've only believed there could be equity now I'll define I was just about to say that if you give a 50 kg bag of rice to a man and a woman the man will carry it better but what you must do is ensure that why she's carrying a 50 kg bag of rice there's someone to help her because she's a woman there should be a balance and there are times women are stronger they are making decisions they are more emotional and caring about things a man just takes the obvious logical decision it might be destructive without thought process so they both have their advantages we should learn to play the line according to those advantages and no more we just give them equal, it's not possible that's exactly what I wanted to bring up that even with feminism we have to be realistic and practical with what is on ground you can't call equality they say come on as you rightly said you can't do it but it's the equity that if there's a job a number of men that apply should equal number of women that apply if he's going to earn this you should earn that but there must be a balance stroke because whether we like it or not there is a home that needs to be built we can begin to argue it in all shades but what it is what is on the ground so it seems that we have so many misconceptions about feminism but we have to put this discussion on hold as till next stay tuned