 Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of the Procrastinators podcast. The show on the internet about a bunch of people who make stuff talking about stuff. I'm the best guy ever, and today we're joined by Digibro. I'm alive. Very true. I'm alive for you. I'm alive for me. We're all alive. That's true. Which after our podcast yesterday, that's a good sign. I can't believe it. That's very true. That's very true. Though this will be a week and one day when this goes up. But no matter. Okay. Let's get right to it. All right people. Okay. Incest. We're talking about incest. That's what it is. So let me get some dictionary definitions off of the Urban Dictionary of course. Okay. There's two dictionary definitions that are good for this. Okay. First one. Having sex with members of one's own family. Fine. And the second one is, it's very direct. The way the British royal family keeps itself determined. I like that a lot. One of the few times the Urban Dictionary was actually funny. Yeah. They did it good this time. Well shit fam. Let's just launch into it. Literally fam. Oh yeah. That's true. Very well said. Okay. Where do we start with this? I do want to say that I'm the one who said we have to do this episode because two weeks ago we had the fetish cast and all the comments were bitching, Momke, why didn't you talk about your fetish is Momke and I said fuck it. You know what? Let's just do a whole goddamn episode about incest so I can just get it all out there. So I bagged and pleaded and got this to happen. And I was also demanded to be on this by Momke. So Momke since you wanted to, since this is your podcast and you tend to get short changed on the dialogue in these, why don't you give us the big intro? Oh boy. Well I do have a big incest related story about my personal life that I've been waiting to tell if we want to just start off with that or if we want to wait for later. Let's do it. Now. Let's do it now. Okay. It's all the way back to my freshman year of high school. The story of how incest changed my life forever in a either positive or negative way that'll be up to the viewer to decide. First of all. Excellent. The question for you folks at home. Let's go around the horn. And I mean you guys, not the fucking audience because I can't reply. Do you think it's okay? And I was under the impression that it is okay after reading Harry Potter. Do you think it's okay to date your best friend's siblings? That's a tough one. Yes. It's a sticky situation. Is it possible to do it right? Yes. It is possible. It can be done. I mean I think it's definitely okay but if your best friend has a problem with it then it's going to cause friction in your relationship. Yeah. Well like. Yeah. There's a lot of siblings who won't care. Like yeah go ahead fuck my sister. I don't give a shit. Well that was one of those situations I was in. I was a freshman. My girlfriend was a year younger and we met because my best friend who I guess will call Harper, because I have a Harper Lee book right in front of me. So my best friend Harper. Year older. Is it to kill a mockingbird by chance? No. It's to Ghost at a Watchman. She wrote only two. Because I stole a copy of Ghost at a Watchman from the store I was working at because I was like oh there's a bunch of controversy. I wonder if this is even worth it. And then I never even opened it. I just have it sitting on my shelf. Is that the sequel to to Kill a Mockingbird? Turns out it's the prequel actually. Yeah. Well. She's an Atticus Finch. A little bit racist. A little bit racist. It's not actually a prequel. It's like the original incarnation of to kill a mockingbird that she wrote and realized it was shit. And then scrapped it and used the same characters to write a better book. Because in this one scout is like an adult. Even though scouts like a child and to kill a mockingbird. But enough about that. There's no Atticus Scout incest unless you go to a certain part of Tumblr which I have definitely been to. So I'm dating my best friend's younger sister. Two years younger than him. I'm just picturing Scout now. You're dating Scout. I'm dating Scouts. Very tomboyish. Yes. And her older brother Bo. Bo is you know not appreciating this. Are you picturing like your imagination of Scout from reading the book or like the movie version of Scout? My imagination. Like this little girl with like a bob cut and stuff. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So you know me and the girl we're dating and like I'm 15 and she's 14. So she doesn't really want to do any of you know the sexy stuff like we can kiss. We can hold hands. We can hang out. But she don't want to touch that dick. She don't want to show me those titties. She don't want to let me go cave exploring if you know what I mean. So imagine my surprise towards the end of the relationship. I find out that this girl has cheated on me. Not only with my best friend but with her own brother. Whoa. Whoa. Dang. So that's two major betrayals. Girlfriend cheating on you and also oh yeah my best friend slept with my girlfriend or whatever the fuck. They didn't sleep together. They actually fucked them. They didn't sleep together. Oh okay okay. So that's two major hurdles for you to get over. What did they do if not sleep together? Well that's the thing. The third thing is you know I'm always you know me I'm a pushing guy so hey how about you touch my dick today. Yeah I don't want to. I don't want to do that. So I find out that she gave her own brother a big old handy in the living room down when the parents are upstairs sleeping give him a big old handy make him come all over her hand show off those titties me what does mom could get not a damn thing. I guess she only likes her relatives because I didn't get shit. I can only assume where this is going because I know where my mind is going is that you jacked off to this image for ever ever since this is all you've thought about it. It was heartbreaking and it was demented and I'm still friends to I guess bow Harper Lee bow whatever we're calling him to this day and I don't talk to that bitch because oh boy do I want to go and I guess I have to I guess I have to it was it ruined everybody's life it ruined everybody's life sure because she told this to me like out of guilt or something and nobody else knew and the other important part of the story is that their mom is the most hardcore Christian woman in the entire world and we would all hang out because every Wednesday after school you would go to their place like a big group of friends and then they would take us to church and we would do like the Wednesday night church thing and I was already well into my atheist years but I went just because it was fun and we did not do any of the church things we just fucked around because it was great so so I'm like okay this mom is probably not going to be okay with this happening so I guess I'll tell somebody who can tell somebody to tell her because I'm not letting this go by baby also there was like a speech competition sort of thing through the church where like all these church people would go to like the big big arena area in downtown Des Moines did you do a speech about how this girl gave her brother a hand job is that how you're going with this okay by speech I mean like it's different types of performances so you can do skits you can do music or whatever and me and Harper Lee we did a an atheist duo Christian rap performance and the judges fucking loved it and we want to trip to Michigan because we were so good and then right after all of this emerges and the mom finds out and fucking places both of them in solitary confinement and like sets up nanny cams all throughout their house to make sure that their kids aren't fucking anymore and so I lost myself a trip to Michigan and she wouldn't let us go because of this so hang on did you do the rap thing with the girl or with the guy with the guy okay that's what I thought women don't have talent I still I still know the lyrics if you want to hear a little bit of it yes yeah yeah Jesus the one turned a fish into a ton turn water into wine and he also held the blind by just spitting in the dirt it can make blind eyes work if you got a problem he could do a miracle for you and that's most of it hell yeah the crowd was pumped they were they were fucking chanting and dancing and shit and then the black judge said yo that's some good shit and that man went on to be Kanye West Michigan for like what were you gonna do because so it was like the regional part of the contest and then Michigan was like the Nationals where we would perform a rap in front of like with all the other rappers more like these two pasty white guys who aren't even Christian doing this shit man what a tale what a yarn so yeah as still friends with Harper did yeah I'm I assume you would know if this ever happened again like does he still fuck his sister well the the thing is after this came out and the mom fucking lay down the hammer that girl is now the most sheltered like yeah like hidden from the society hardcore Christian person I've ever encountered and I I don't even think I could I would have expected the reverse I would have expected her to go like full fucking slut or something no I think they went pretty hard on her I think that the parents fucking ended her life after that see see this is this is good because this ties into our larger discussion of incest no one's life should be you know in a major way curtailed or changed just because they happen to give their brother a hand job one time it's not that big a deal everybody it's all we could all relax I'm curious right now I know monkeys and only child I have a younger brother oh that's right patchy why do I keep forgetting about patchy you've got a younger brother I've got two younger brothers Nate's got an older brother a younger sister Tom you've got two younger sisters right correct so most of us I feel like there's got to be a big difference and like the perception of incest between me and monkey and Nate and Tom yeah I that's everything so I'm sure that's true and and I also think that it comes like like your perception of it is not just affected by like whether or not you have siblings of the opposite sex but also just like how close you are with your family and in general so I'm very curious to hear you what we'll say yeah I want to know as I know um well anyway I want to hear from Tom first what do you think of incest cuz I don't know what you're coming into this with at all yeah um I mean I guess as someone who has two sisters I can't I can't even fathom doing that like you know I mean I don't have any attraction to them they're good people I'd go to war for them if they needed me but I wouldn't do that sorry just so we're clear I mean you know only some of us have sisters but we've all got a mother we've all got a mother everybody that's where I draw also has not the best relationship with this Bob that's true that's all that sexual tension dude you know well the thing is like I don't think any of us would fuck any of our actual family but right I think the way that you feel about your family affects how interested you are in like incest porn so like I'm wondering Tom like do you like incest porn at all any of the different relationships I don't find any of that particularly arousing or interesting like I mean there I've seen like incest stuff and to me it's like completely like I guess it's just neutral because like my view on incest in general is that like I feel like we just need to stay out of people's bedrooms in general as long as there's consent that's fine I don't really care it's not my business and I don't see the harm in it I think there's way worse things to do than to fuck a family member if they're both consenting and of age I mean like yeah people are gonna think it's fucked up sure but like I don't I just I don't really care like if that's what you want to do that's you want to do like you know if you can fuck do that seems relatively banal in the grand scheme of things that we've allowed to become culturally accepted so I just I don't see any sort of like controversy but I think probably like if you wanted to have a kid with a family member that's when I'd start to draw the line because then you're talking about like genetic issues at some point you know you know I whenever I bring that up people always tell me that like oh actually it's not really that common it's a pretty unlikely thing and you know at some point like where we're kind of making a calculation are we prepared to like enforce a rule to say like yes you should not have kids with your siblings because like there is an increased likelihood of you know genetic problems or whatever but like is that really our business you know to like if they wouldn't have a fucked up we definitely let people with genetic problems have kids okay here's the thing we let stupid people breed we let stupid people breed why do we allow that yeah that's the thing that that's well there's interesting way of I don't I don't think it should be illegal but I think it definitely I think it's ethically irresponsible so I guess like that you have to like make this the distinction between like what do I find personally ethically wrong to do and what do I think should be legally do you think it's also like if you have like I don't know if I don't know a good example I don't know if Down syndrome or anything is like hereditary but like if you had something like that and there was like an equal chance you were gonna pass it on to your kids as like incest has a genetic defect do you think it's also ethically irresponsible to have kids if you have Down syndrome or something of that nature that you know I mean that the kind of isn't is it unethical to have a child with Down syndrome like at all like like because that is a person who's alive and you know can live and stuff so it's not like it's like evil to have a person with that and they're pretty much just gonna live their life and probably you know not really hurt anybody and die but they're kind of like a burden on the state or on their parents on their parents I guess but there's nothing like immoral about it it's just like we don't really want to incentivize it I guess yeah you know maybe I guess at the same time though it's like this is a person who has no say in even being born and then the first place and it's like true what you're purposely and knowingly hobbling them with a lifelong incurable condition and like do you have more responsibility to to do something about that because like it's not just it's not just you saying like I'm prepared to deal with the consequences of having to raise a child with this condition it's like I'm willingly you know me capping them with this condition and I know it's going to happen it's going to make their life more difficult and I'm gonna do it anyways just to make that question even more frustrating and complicated like it's it's not it's not exactly like if you you know do one thing you'll have a baby who like might okay like if you if you have the genetic potential for Down syndrome and like you have sex or you have a kid with someone else who like is also likely to have that and then you have a kid with Down syndrome versus like if you have sex with somebody else who that's less likely and then you don't it's not actually like you're changing the baby that was born it's that you're just making a different baby so actually in like the moral implications of that are that what you're doing is you're sort of just choosing to not give life to one person who would just live a life with Down syndrome and you're instead choosing to give life to a totally different separate person since like you know the same sperm won't probably be the thing that is the same egg this is like a really philosophical way of thinking about childbirth it's never considered and it's fucking with my mind that's that's me baby it's a lot it's a lot to think about it's a complicated multi-layered issue because like the ethical ramifications of taking every basically every woman you don't have a kid with is a kid you're choosing not to exist it's true it's true and that's that's part by the way let me just I don't mind being totally clear on here I fucking love incest in my porn I'm so all about it I think it's great in in most of its forms I like I like mother son I like siblings not as much into daddy daughter that that can get a little that's interesting that's why I am I was interested is leading up to this podcast because we we've discussed incest plenty of times in the chat and we were talking about it in there you like mother son and I like daddy daughter but not so much the opposite in both of our cases yeah I would like to hear this from both of you because I'm into siblings and like cousins but when it comes to parents I think it is horrifying so I would like to hear both of you justify this wait wait it's the fantasy it's the fantasy I don't mean you're gonna fuck your mom Nate I just want to know like like what is like is there any logical thing behind it before we do that though monkey do you like when you think siblings who do you want to be the older one boy or girl doesn't matter doesn't matter at all okay both have their benefits I mean I like the big sister I definitely like the son because I'm wearing a little sister for the same reasons I think for as I am into daddy daughter what's interesting to me about that Nate is I and I think I know like this is the best logic I could come up with and this is gonna sound real gay for both okay okay but I'm an older brother and you're a younger brother true you're closest with Ben I'm closest with Victor you know yeah like if you if if so you're the daddy and I'm the son in this sort of in this no what I'm saying is that like you would be interested in older sisters because of the fact that like you were closest with your older brother and like maybe you've always had like in your mind like what if what if I what if my older sibling like who cares for me and stuff was actually like a hot chick I could fuck you know because that's how I think of little like younger sister I'm always like what if my little brothers were a hot chick I could fuck like how much better my life have been you know that makes sense to me yeah well see that's that's kind of what right there that's what I was gonna say that I like about like mother and son stuff what what I like about the mother and son stuff is that it's actually pretty similar to the to like the older sister thing it's that like okay so you're just going about your life and like you just you've got a mom and like she's a woman you know she's always a woman and that that doesn't change it's like always below the surface is this question that like you know we totally could fuck we totally could fuck if we wanted no it's not I don't say is that I've never in my god damn pornography is god damn it in my fantasy you when I think you're talking about us well I can't speak for you guys but it's not it's it's the fact that like there's a woman just in your life all the time and society says you're totally not allowed to fuck her but then you could you totally could and I'm saying you in the sense of in this fantasy you know hentai verse and that's it and that which is similar to like the older sister thing and like you know there's like the it's a little different like the old the mom thing is more like oh dad's always away no one's here to satisfy me I'm a woman I have needs blah blah blah they then they fuck their son whereas with the older sister it's more like the sister I always picture like Kesha when I think about this like oh she's like a black woman Kesha is white dude oh she's fucking daughter she has a fucking number sign in her name I thought it was a black person I think so I let me double I could be wrong about that but but like the point is like she comes bombing drunk from the club getting a hard no from someone who knows Kesha okay all right fine maybe I'm wrong but so she comes bombing from the club she just collapsed on the ground she's like yeah I was out just like clubbing and I'm such a slut look at me and she's like trying to impress her little brother and little brother's like yeah whatever dude and she's just like no you don't understand like I do this because I want to get your attention I want to get your attention because you're always there you're the guy who I really want to impress and then they fuck and that's you know I yeah I don't dislike like mother son or sister older sister but like if it's older sister in both cases I prefer if the son is like at least a teenager oh yeah I can't really show to shit yeah like because it's always those tiny dicks don't do it for me tiny dicks do not do it and just like the woman being like just like massive and smothering like that's definitely a different fetish is like just wanting to be like tiny and to just be like encompassed by a woman like have because in those ones it's always like a little show to and then like a mom or sister with like just giant tits and like a huge thick body that's just like covering the little boy to the point of like you know and that I feel like it's a whole different thing well did I just reminded me that after the fetish episode somebody did make art of hippo as Jesus in the pieta and it's really great oh yeah it does I don't hippo is listening in to this yeah cast I don't know if he wants to be in but I've gotten the impression he's more into Shota than we are he's into those big women so I think yeah he likes the big encompassing women it seems like so he can there's a type in the chat if that's how he feels I'm not entirely sure yeah there you go it's good there you go okay you've got the word the official word from on high show these good everybody we've got confirmation yeah hey Nate I have a question for you since you okay you don't like mother son I do I do like okay well since you do it as a kid did you watch Malcolm in the middle I did I did very much because as a kid watching that in the way that Lois would terrorize her sons I think that is what scared me away from ever even thinking about something like that because it's terrifying well you know what okay I feel like with something like that I don't feel like that even necessarily would have like drawn me away from it because the whole thing is like this is like a fantasy but like like what if like my mother was like this like super hot slut and she needs sex desperately and I'm a man god damn it like you know like you're putting yourself in this in this fictional situation where like if your mother was like this kind of person then you know would be sexy times but you know so yeah so it's like a departure so I could see why like seeing a like a female not role model but like a female character or like a mother specifically acting in that way like as like a terrorizing you know bitch of a mom would would like turn someone off well there's that episode where she she walks around the house topless and I was wondering if episode one yeah that's episode one yeah I'm wondering if you were into that um I remember as a little kid finding it you know eyebrow raising like oh what's going what have we going on over here but yeah and I remember distinctly she opens the door and Malcolm's teacher is there and she's not wearing a shirt and she's like the teacher like that and she's like they're just boobs lady and I'm sure yours are much nicer than mine I remember that and she's like no no I swear they're not they're really not I think well I'm not that into like mother son but I am totally into mom's like in general sure sure like like in my porn I prefer it be like if a guy is hooking up with someone who is a mom that's harder to me just because I don't know there's you're talking that kid there's something like I like to feel the baby inside when I'm you know I didn't say pregnancy well I'm taking it to that place for some reason I see whatever I see like mother son stuff I always have this like weird feeling like the mom is being irresponsible somehow oh yeah you know like in that that turns me off a little bit for some reason even though yeah mom should definitely not have sex with their kids unless absolutely necessary important PSA from Nate best man that's right unless absolutely necessary I definitely put that caveat in there that's important I should have to think what the reason for absolutely necessary would be like they've got a gun to my head man what can I do I didn't have a gun to your head question for you Nate but I think did you want to finish yeah I'm sorry oh no I think I said okay Nate incest question for you okay gun to your head you have to get a handjob from one of them Ben are your sister well obviously my sister oh fuck off I'd get a handjob from Ben immediately I don't even need the gun don't even excuse Nate you don't think your sister is hot um yeah she looks sort of like me so totally you know I don't want to be it's weird for me to even think of her in those terms she is a she's a perfectly attractive young lady who I have deep respect for that's really the extent of it I feel like a I know of a lot of stories of like siblings who do end up doing more sexual stuff like if they're close in age when they're much younger you know sure sure me and Victor never did anything like weird together but we did look at porn as kids together like we would and just like I don't know I sort of tried to teach him how to grind his cock against the ground I definitely have known lots of sisters who've done stuff like that as kids you know Lena Dutta my hero that's the thing I feel like incest when when you have close siblings and you're all going through that sort of pubescent age together it's it would almost be weirder for me to think of it never happening you know like if you're like a year and a half apart from your sibling and both are even twin says yeah or even twins sure and you're like eight or not I refuse to believe there's any twins who haven't fucked like it's just masturbation yeah definitely done something together you can't be twins and not do anything like cuz you're experiencing it at the exact same time like your bodies are both changing both of you are like quizzical about it and you're extremely close with each other so like who else are you gonna share this with you know that's the thing so if you keep that in mind as you watch the sweet life of Zach and Cody it really has a different narrative that's forming for you but what for me like a lot of my incestuous fantasies come from that sort of that age like being discovering your body and being like who can help me understand this you know who is in the best position it's not a stranger you know and and the schools don't teach you enough society doesn't teach you enough you're just quizzical about your body who's gonna help you learn about it but your big your big brother you know he's gonna help this little this cute little girl figure out but Lena Dunham why she's so hot down there yeah yeah you know it's interesting I have a different sort of approach to it I noticed in the stories I gravitate to it's more like it's more like sort of like the like the mom notices like wow you've really become a man you've really become a man now with them you know it's that that sort of angle I get to yeah that's that's interesting because we're looking at this from very different age ranges like yeah I what I think I like little sisters and it's in daughters it's just like a loli thing for me you know I'm picturing like age 8 to 12 and you're probably picturing guys like 16 to 20 or something yeah yeah something like that yeah because what I what what turns me on about the little sister or the daughters that they look up to you it's someone who's like really close to you who looks up to you who thinks you're the coolest person in the world and like all they want is to like be close and make you happy you know you know I'm with you and I feel you on that it's just that particular idea sort of strikes me as sort of emotional manipulation like you really shouldn't fuck your eight-year-old sister you know it's not really advice from Nate it's not the best idea so you know it's a fantasy that's fine but that's just why like I feel like I'm doing something bad which I don't find attractive yeah well the best part about incest is that none of us would do it with our real siblings right but I don't know if patchy came over and I was kind of drunk you know like you know just a bro job what was gonna happen pro job what was the thing I was saying I wanted us to do cock handshakes yeah cocking at a red one someone then pointed out to me is just jacking each other off and I legit had not put that together when I came I was like no you just grab the cock and shake it like you're shaking a hand so it's like that's you're just masturbating them and I'm like I always thought it was sort of like entwining the dicks together and then kind of gyrate against each other that's how I was interpreting it that's no I was just picturing everybody like everybody standing in the circle like grabbing each other's dicks and just like giving it a firm handshake like once just like hello just one pump right you know yeah okay okay well um still on the table right con three yeah we got plans we got plans so where do we where do we go from here we really covered like the the main stuff there I like I just wanted to talk about like all the there's so many different varieties of incest you know I don't know what you know monkey Brent mentioned sort of like a more distant family members things like cousin yeah which is actually kind of socially acceptable you know depending on yeah that's how anime gets away with all of it is that it's always a cousin like unless you're looking at because that shit pisses me off because I feel like you're just trying to get the being fucking cowards yeah commit well it's cuz they want cuz the appeal again the appeal of the little sister is that she looks up to you she's been with you your whole life she and she wants to ride the dick right but then it's always like oh but she's not actually my sister it's really my cousin but she still calls me on each on because I'm like a brother to her and I'm like you don't get to have it both ways like to me this is cheap you know did you got to help me with this real quick I've been wondering for a long time now is it actually a thing they do we're like girls just call guys that they're really close with Oni chan like how is anyone any guy in the age range of like of like a teenager to a young adult is an Oni son like right only just means like a male of that age so doesn't mean brother it can well Oni can also mean brother yes but it means both like just like oh gee son can mean uncle or it can mean a man of in like the late 20s early 30s middle middle age oh gee son is middle-aged man I said oh geez son is grandpa or Jesus Christ okay okay all right so only of which what are our thoughts on grandparent incest that way you guys draw the line you know okay I grandma she's hot well there's some there are some hot grandmas out there but yeah sure but but but but to me a hot gram there's some people who are into like grandmas you know like a fat flabby old woman yeah not interested if a grandma is still keeping it tight after all these years that's hot yeah like mom mom keys grandma we can all fantasize about mom yeah I always think of the the grandma from Majlis shopping arcade of an obashi you know that one you know her it's been way too long since I've seen that whatever yeah I fuck a grandma what I was gonna say is what grandmas are less on the table with there's this one porn I don't remember what the fuck it's called it's by this guy Yosino who does all this great 3d porn and he's got one where it's like these two super old grandpas fucking they're like super young granddaughters and I've always got the sense from it that like they're doing it out of like respect like these are the patriarchs of the family and we want to like please them because they're fucking old and they deserve it and I think that's yeah yeah no the girls are like oh we respect our grandfather so we're gonna fuck them and they seem to be enjoying it so I'm like this is cool isn't that typical Japanese culture yes that's why I that's why I've interpreted it that way yeah I'm not entirely sure if that's what the actual plot is cuz I hey man cultural relativism what can I say it's all on the table it's all good it's all fine I can't I need to look up it's called I've got it on my computer but you guys well I yeah I was gonna say the whole like I like that that sort of thing in my porn of like you're kind of obligated to like fuck within the family sort of thing yeah like kind of like the Targaryen thing you know it's like I don't know isn't it kind of sexy that like Daenerys was like raised with her brothers and she's like and they're like yeah you're gonna fuck your brothers you're gonna do this you got no choice it's pretty hot it's pretty hot I'm just saying what about Cersei and Jaime like that's they're like a perfect they're the opposite I really I really like their incest because of the fact that they are grown adults and they've like had the kids and everything of the incest and they're still like completely in love with each other like it's really interesting to me because usually you see it as like when they're younger and then you kind of assume that eventually I don't know they stop when she marries the king or something but no they're still fucking doing it like in their 40s that's pretty cool I agree and I can't believe I didn't even think of this until right now but ore emo or a fucking emo oh magos magos and pen is the name of that old man fucking if anybody was really really needed that yeah I'm looking can you send me a link after this podcast no I've got it downloaded so let me just tell you let me just tell you my general feelings about ore emo okay so ore emo is this fascinating story about a boy who wants to fuck his sister and she's dumb so she thinks she wants to fuck him to and like she slow like he slowly through doesn't even start to describe the plot of or it's close enough it's the things that matter neither one of them wanted to fuck each other at the start of the series at all they it was a subtext okay but the point is that they get to that place and like they develop all these friendships over the course of the series and then slowly but surely this is like ore emo is where like incest is at its worst really in like fiction stuff cuz like what happens is that he's built up all these friends he's made all these connections like in the first part of the show when like it wasn't just about the two of them fucking you know they just whatever they develop relationships with lots of these people they just live life they just live life and do good stuff and all these other women come into the guy's life that he could choose from and slowly but surely in the second half of the show he just one by one kills off all those other girls and is eventually just left with Kirino he has sacrificed everything else in his life all these other relationships for this incestuous relationship that's going to be a huge problem with a 15 year old girl that is obviously not going to last and like it just ends with like they kiss and then they break up and it's so like when I look at that it's just like this guy threw away all this potential good shit in his life for this relationship that he also threw right in the trash and that he should have known from the start like wasn't going to go anywhere I thought they got married or some shit they I mean it's like different in the manga or like the novels versus the anime or something like in the anime which is the thing that I watched which which made me want to die they just kiss and then they're like okay we're done okay we're done and there's some subjects like ooh maybe they'll keep dating in secret or something like already most the dumbest way to do because yeah okay the have you seen Genchi Ken any of you at all in the whole thing yeah so you remember that early on there's like a discussion about incest where because my derame the character who is my my my boy is a big big into little sisters and lollies and shit and sasa hara the main character guy he is not into little girls at all he's all into big beautiful bitches big big boy big hippo kind of guy yeah yeah he's a big titty boy and the reason for that is that he has a younger sister who's like again guru who he fights with all the time and so he sees it as like younger sisters are completely disgusting like he's not even slightly interested because he has this contentious relationship with his and my friend Don son who is the one who like got me into like deeper deep deeper otaku shit you know he was very much the same he had a little sister he argued with her all the time he thought little sisters were totally out of the picture and the funny thing about it is that the way Kirino's relationship with her brother is portrayed early in the show is exactly that kind of relationship like they're at each other's throats they don't like each other like that's right it felt very realistic and then the show somehow bends over backwards and pretzels itself to make them end up together that's that's the whole problem right there and it's just the most earth shattering like reversal of like an actually good idea that just fucking makes you want to die it's nuts it's fucking insane yeah and like it's weird because like if that's what the dude wanted to do all along like why did he take this like weird security's path that was actually made sense and was like the total opposite of the I don't know it just it baffles me to this fucking day anyway now that you've derailed us with or ebo for it's relevant it's relevant it's the most interesting thing that happened in it's probably the most famous incest anime that's out there other than maybe kiss excess which I don't think those are his real sisters in that show I yeah I think you're right have any of you guys seen the shitty Adam Sandler movie that's my boy no no I have not it was the first time and I've I've never been into Game of Thrones or any of that so it was the first time I'd seen incest propelled in the mainstream at least in the US the plot of the movie is Andy Sandberg is the son of Adam Sandler and that he's getting married and then Adam Sandler finds out that the fiance is fucking her brother and it was played as a joke and I thought it was funny and I was the only person laughing in the theater at the big reveal and everybody around me was like this this awkward really like they're in awe and disgust and they're kind of horrified by the film and that was the first time that I realized oh maybe the mainstream people are more horrified of this than I think because I thought this was funny for a shitty Adam Sandler movie. I think this podcast right here is probably the most positive that four people have been about incest publicly ever in history. It's quite possible. Even the guy who has no incest fetishes is like yeah man stay out of people's bedrooms like granted Tom is also the guy who wrote the what's it called Tom. How do you want to describe it before I describe it? How do you want to salvage the description of your your your pony fanfic? Oh about no underaged or sex. There's no way to salvage it. Is this not the tricksy one? Is this something else? No the one he wrote about Scootaloo having sex with a like 30 year old guy. That sounds great. It was a full novel. It was received to Y to claim which disgusted me to this day. I had no idea. What? You wrote a full-length pony novel? He wrote a full-length pony fanfiction. 2013 novel. It's horrible. Holy shit. How did you not know that? I don't know I guess maybe I just got confused and whenever like it came up I just kept thinking it was like the tricksy comic for some reason and I always thought I always thought you were saying like you never written a book but here you go here's your breakout hit dude. That doesn't count as a book. Is the old man a human or a pony? It's all horse gay shit. But the older guy is also like borderline XB for Tom himself. What was that guy's cutie mark? Everyone said that. It wasn't even the point. Maybe just because it's written from his perspective so it sounds like he was groaning curious for sure. Yeah, that's true. That's what I thought it was good. Well, yeah, I don't know what was your even your question. What does it have to do with what we were talking about? I was just pointing out that you that while you are not an incest fetishist I cannot pretend as though you're like the normie here. No, clearly, no. Everybody go read that fanfare. I don't know what it's called. Post a link in the description, Ben. I know you're gonna listen through when you edit this. Of course. Ben can dig it up. Hey, if we have well if we're not, you know, super into incest we can just do 30 minutes of questions. Yeah, I was just thinking maybe let's just switch over to that. I can potentially say more about incest. If you got it if you got a thing you want to say yeah go for it. I don't know how deep I want to get into it but because like because yeah you guys talk about it as like a fetish I never thought of incest as a fetish like it was more just a tag like it's not something I sought out I like it especially like again like a older brother younger sister stuff but more because like I mostly encountered it so much because I like lollies in general so I would come across a lot of that you know it wasn't so much that I was seeking it out and so like I I wouldn't have said I had like a fetish for it until recently and that's because it turns out that while your girlfriend looks exactly like she'd be your sister that is well that too and and she's like way into that idea. You know my little sister's name is Grace and Ben's first girlfriend was a girl named Grace. I'm just saying I'm just but but it's funny you say that they were the dick show I was listening to just before like earlier today was about how he was saying like I couldn't fuck a girl who had the same name as my sister. Ben's got no problem with that. I agree I agree with that statement I don't think I could do it that'd be really weird. If I met a girl named Patchy it would just make me harder. My perception of incest as a fetish has changed dramatically upon the realization that you can role play that fetish like all you have to do is just pretend like okay you are my sister and it's like you're fucking your eight-year-old younger sister just because you say that you are and so you can put the age in there could it just yeah no I had to part out he likes the little a she's like yeah it's gotta be fine it's gotta be a little girl or else it's not who am I to judge I shouldn't butt in because if if she's her real age that she's just my wife you know like that's right you can still be your sister it's not you gotta compartmentalize all sisters aren't eight it's eight when they develop sexually they don't develop age eight yeah girls start developing at eight I don't fucking way I do there were girls in my class in third grade who had tits like real tits like they started eight girls start way younger yeah guys start around 10 girls start their periods at like age 10 they first of all you can start getting wet before you get your period and so you probably okay there was a period where I was trying to write novels and all the characters I wrote were young girls so I interviewed a bunch of women about what it's like to be a young girl when you start developing different sexual feelings like this fucking mom who do you know like people online like women I knew in the anime blogging sphere and you know both girlfriends I've had so the answer I always get is eight eight is about when you start thinking about sexual stuff and then we hear on the PCB going to officially say the age of consent should be eight years old should be 12 years old okay all right Mexico's got it right I put it like 15 13 something around the way my the way my fantasy usually goes is you start you start at eight is when the interest develops but by the way it's not until a few years later that you actually go all the way once their right your dad takes you into the back room and he starts to explain to you and he starts to feel you and show you how it works right okay understood he knows what's up he said yeah he knows his way around well I do want to say did you that something was just uploaded to YouTube that I think might be the perfect example of the worst video that you could ever possibly see do you know how you and your girlfriend have been doing that series of reviewing every Pokemon and looking at the pictures and stuff well wouldn't you know our good friend of the show future PCP member Psy just uploaded his own version co-hosted by Asperger and it's two hours of them reviewing just the first 60 Pokemon so they're taking their sweet time yeah I guess moving along guys I think did you would get a lot from watching that video is two favorite people copying his idea and doing it twice as long are they just like why would I want what is the relevance what is the relevance to our topic here I understand are you just trying to shout out that video is that is that your point no because I was thinking about how him and his girlfriend do that series and then this just popped up in my sub feed I haven't actually watched okay okay two hours well they need to hurry their fucking asses every Pokemon in two hours yeah I was saying I thought that would be like the ultimate video to piss off did you but I guess I was mistaken it's hard to piss off did you anyway we want to move to good questions now are we done I have let's do it I got nothing else to say hashtag legalize it hashtag you know let me fuck my mom you know just all the hashtags you know legalize check off to your mom at all I can safely say no I can safely say no not even tempted no never Tom never okay you okay here here's here's a thing at there I'm just gonna say that at some points in my life I have acknowledged that my sister is a girl I have been aware of that fact if you if you understand what I'm saying I'm not saying that no not saying that I'm not saying that when I was like when I was particularly like depressed lonely learning about sex 12 years old I jacked off to like every woman in my family I think every woman I've ever come into contact with you know probably jacked off thinking about at least briefly usually followed by immense guilt and realizing it wasn't a good idea but yeah I was gonna say like to me it's weird I felt weird sometimes like I didn't do that but like I would like into my mind I would force myself to just concentrate on like one of my classmates like one specific one and be like yeah now I fuck this person in my brain same fucking sick actually before we move on from incest I want to take you all to the darkest side of incest the worst excellent element of it that I hate that has affected me in a very in a way that makes me sick and want to cry okay have you ever had incest dreams no anybody I yeah I think I have I think I have actually how did that I fucked my sister in my dream I believe I did do that one time Tom dreams yeah I've never had incest dreams so I've had dreams again I rarely remember my dreams so who the fuck knows that's true I I've had dreams thank you for my brain I've had incest dreams and they are horrifying and they always wake me make me wake up like feeling like I want to throw up everywhere and it's like the worst experience of my life is incest dreams it's the worst part it's when you have to go clean up your underwear afterwards no none of them are none of them are the sexy kind they're all like horror like all my dreams are nightmares like every dream I have is a nightmare so my incest dreams are all like terrifying and bad and I legit wake up like feeling like I actually am gonna throw up like well hey why is are you like in a sex dungeon being like raped or something what's what's so bad about I think there was one where I raped one of them okay that was bad I also dream about raping Victor but I don't have the same reaction you do yeah let's move on to questions we all agree that if we could we would fuck Victor I think we can agree with that let me let me get it I'll be the questions boy today since I asked on the yeah we're taking them from the PCP patreon chat if you didn't know on discord what's the how much that the pay to get into the patreon chat but just one dollar just one dollar if you're patron at all you get into our exclusive patron discord it's the only place that discusses this show that is not cancer so true the comment section on YouTube utter cancer disgusting deplorable cancer the PCP fan discord that I run discord cancer that existed before this absolute cancer do not go there you will want to kill yourself yeah but the patient one is okay so we're taking money conveniently is great yeah because the paywall man paywall people give money it's true alright from tadpo he asks how do you deal with backlogs after long stays away from the internet this is something I have a lot of trouble with I don't know what you guys hmm you know I like after like a weekend or something being away just to look at my YouTube and see like all the videos that have piled up I don't know nothing fancy I guess I really just try to just break it down and just ease into it one thing at a time I'm pretty organized in the way I approach the stuff so I like categorize it or if there's like a show that I've missed I just try to get all the episodes so I have them at my fingertips and then I'll watch it when I need to I I end up leaving just a lot of shit unwatched like it's I can't like it because they're still coming out you know like I follow enough channels to keep me busy throughout the day so if I stack up a week of missed videos and then that day there's also a bunch of new videos coming out it's like oh this is never gonna happen I sometimes I'll go through and I'll just cull the stuff that I'm like okay you know I don't actually need to watch like the new best of the worst or example or something like that yeah I usually skip best of the worst but I won't skip half in the bag but that's because it's easier to throw on in the background and like ironically the stuff the stuff I watch the most on YouTube is the shit I don't have to pay attention to because I can just leave it running continuously the stuff that I actually have to concentrate on I often end up getting to like way later or I miss everything or I'll have a day where like for instance with hippo he was doing his in gavua to a tige right when I was a traveling the country and a lot of those videos were longer and stuff and I felt like I had to watch them so I had like a whole weekend of just like all I did was watch hippo videos until I was caught up you know what a weekend yeah moving on to another question that never happens to me because I am never away from the Internet yeah and also most of the people I follow like Nate never uploads so it's fine hey man we Agua is real I uploaded last night at 5 a.m. yeah yeah me and sheep overwatched it this morning and 10 out of 10 it was let me say the best part of waking up is not folders in your cup it's oh there you go I love I love what you're doing with your Hillary Clinton fucking cut out it's great I've got big plans we've got big plans yeah monkey here's a question I'm actually interested in hearing your answer in because you know movies and actors a little better than the rest of us cucked by the laws of aerodynamics asks which actor would have would you have playing you in a PCP movie oh that's a good one we should we should cast the whole movie all ten of us can we get John Goodman to play Gib we use CGI and we we shrink him digitally on the screen it's perfect yeah I mean I mean the actors have to be close to our age because I've heard that I look like Martin Freeman and I would like to be portrayed by him but more likely would be like Elijah Wood Elijah Woods like 40 now man yeah but he looks like 15 yeah he does um do you like Elijah Wood would you have him play you yeah I'm down with him I don't know if I don't know if he like is temperamentally similar to you he did one movie where he plays like this creepy kind of serial killer guy so I think you can get into the demented state of monkey Jones actually so I think Michael Sarah should play Davoo for sure that's a weirdly good right he does it like a weird way I can tell a weird way yeah why does that work that shouldn't work at all it's the hair it's really the hair I guess so Tom do you know who you would have play you in a movie I don't know actors don't pay attention to like yeah that's culture I would just say Christian Bale because according to 4chan I'm a Mexican Christian I can see that I can see you that's perfect especially like from the machinist all actors are that's that's what movies are about man Nate you have an actor you'd pick without a doubt it'd be Tom Cruise it'd be modern Tom Cruise would play me he's the only man strong enough with enough mental fortitude to handle the lifestyle the best guy I feel like you're more jacked than Tom Cruise oh no man I'm working on it but he's a little short he's a little short I'm fuck I mean like I'm probably the same height as him actually but like for Hollywood he's short but nice fit boy I mean like Ellen Page to play mage I think page is it mage is it mage like twice the height of Ellen page that is true that is true John Goodman's playing hippo digitally shrunk John Goodman the poacher to say page is mage I feel like the only answer I can come up with is Jack Black it just seems obvious to me yeah that's not bad I don't know who else it could possibly be so it's got to be Jack Black I don't like it would be a very interesting performance you want to play Jess a lot of people say I look like that dude from Always Sunny whichever one okay okay so I guess a really like big buff tough wrestler these days to play Jess fucking but I would yeah okay the guy from Guardians right but Batista as he is in Guardians 2 should play Jess like literally it should just be Drax the destroyer like yeah just with a wig on you you have never seen anybody enjoy a character more than me and Jess enjoyed Batista in that movie like he was he's the greatest the best guy who played what's the guy who was an anti-Christ Willem Dafoe should play Ben Willem Dafoe should play Ben that little goblin face going on that's perfect we got for Munchie that's the last one oh Munchie should be played by God we'll see if he can fit it in his schedule we should get an actual gigantic baby boy to play I think Munchie should just play himself who else can be Munchie I think that's a good idea he's got time in the movie okay everybody here's another similar question from Orca if any person fictional or non-fictional had to join the PCP who would you want on who's just like an insufferable intellectual pseudo-intellectual if we're going to talk non-fictional I want Max Landis on this show oh man yeah perfect fit be good we'd never get a word in true I it would just be me and him and Nate yeah I'm sure that's true and the podcast we have to start our own splinter say something that's inevitable anyway I want to get Donald Trump on the podcast Tyrion Lannister he'd be a good after Trump would suck dick Trump would just be funny Trump's really funny okay Trump would be funny that's true that's true but he'd fail at making his points coherently like he's a natural comedian a natural showman like if you watch anything that's not political yeah you know that's true that's true considering how dedicated you are to Pokemon going to the polls you you have a moral obligation to get Donald Trump on here and give him what you're right oh I thought you were gonna say to say Hillary to have Hillary join the PCP which is not a bad idea jokes that would fit right in she's full of them dude here's is that everybody I was I was actually gonna read this quite I did like ask questions on Twitter there was just one that I wanted to address just it was sort of a logistical thing it was at Fat Man falling just asks when are you releasing this month's bonus episode and I decided tell everybody we generally release those just on the first of the month like every week every month so they yeah that's it that's it so I'm like three days from now no like oh when this comes out yeah we like three days after this comes out that's true all right the jam asks best and worst ways you've ever spent a shitload of money relative to whatever you think a shitload is I know exactly what it is but I've already told the story before so stop me if I've told this but like one day when I was young and I was really into vampire to D and I bought this $100 leather hat you know you know I already told the best or worst way you spent shitload of money oh it's okay at the same time well kind of but like it's the worst because like I never once actually wore it and immediately regretted spending $100 on it I was just like a whim thing but for me at that age $100 was so much fucking money it's a complete terrible idea it I mean it yeah it's it's a lot in general monkey time once every other month when I when I finally hit the $100 thing for YouTube ad revenue that's a big deal my friend I finally did it free make more than that thing you make more than $100 only because of me and Digi's podcast but then I just give him half anyway so really is that true yeah even with all your fucking big views on your gigantic video do you know how many of those are demonetized oh no like that's a good point are they monetize it because I use some song for like 10 seconds well that's so but it's fine the worst way I've spent a shitload of money relative to what was a shitload at the time is buying two different $130 canon figures for the anime series canon which I'm scared to even rewatch but I've got like $300 just because you're afraid you've wasted your money on these fucking figures you can't watch the show the figures are broken now so like it's a total wash really all my figures I have some level of regret for all the expensive ones just expensive but the best way I spent a shitload of money was buying several hotel trips in Rochester New York to three months ago $600 a week but totally people are you know I hear people say things like what are you doing paying money to you know for like why why should buy local pussy dude what are you doing flying people around and stuff you know if the pussy that good that's right that's right I mean last I would say if I had to pick another one it would like another worst one it would be the second trip to my ex-girlfriend sure the first one was worth it because it was $400 and I lost my virginity and that was nice the second trip not worth it at all should have broke understandable that so yeah yeah I know what you mean probably spent even more on that trip by the way that just your figure story reminds me about how I've been wanting I've had like a fantasy of buying like the perfect coming of figure for years and like they keep there there have been a bunch that come out that are pretty nice and I'm always thinking like yes one day I'll buy that I don't know why I just don't just want to own it and feel a little shrine to the worst part about the two canon figures is that they're they they're like jumping in opposite directions the idea is that the two characters like shooting at each other so you buy both and it's okay set which is a clever idea except that if you have them displayed that way you can't see either of them like they're both jumping away from each other and there's no way to make it so you could see both of their fronts so it's the stupidest idea of a figure set ever and I hate it you know that just this was another that's both related to figures and like a terrible slash great purchase this was both a good and bad thing I know I've told the story before but it's just like how I spent a billion million dollars in like a like a Tokyo crane machine trying to win like the second half of my like CC or C2 and Collins set I'm sure it was far less than the amount of money I spent but here they sit before me link together in this sexy ass pose I'm looking right up CC to his cunt it's great it's great you know it's all good it's all good so I'm that was both a terrible waste of money but also it paid off long-term alright Spooker asks what are your most visited websites V 4chan V that's like the number one I'm on and YouTube Tom well mostly I go to YouTube all the time I just I researched tons of stuff on YouTube I have gone on and gadget every day for the last 10 years it's not an exaggeration whoa what do they do there what it's just like a technology blog but they're becoming super political so I'm like tempted to jump ship because it's starting to get gross mm-hmm and then let me guess let me guess they love Donald Trump oh the best it's they're the most red-pilled site of all time yeah I don't know I don't really go to a lot of websites frequently I just kind of YouTube just does everything you know I Google because I've constantly yeah to learn something and like Google has got my back so it's yeah very true my best friend of all time monkey me I just go on all the standard shit I guess I also go to reddit more than you guys probably oh we've got a redditor on our hands folks my fucking hero well I I'm one of those rare redditors who was mostly on the Donald so right of course I got it where else am I gonna get real news every other website is fake news yeah it's a conendrum I the websites I spend the most time on or without a doubt YouTube and Twitter because that's where all my shitposting is but like I just habitually like cycle through all my bookmarks constantly so I check my anime list every day and accept every friend request I get which is like three or four a day I check Gmail obviously reddit I only go to reddit for my own board I don't actually go anywhere the weirdest one I go to though is every day I go to game FAQs and do the poll of the day oh I did that for a long time I've done that for like a decade like I've been I've voted in every poll of the day I feel like I'm gonna go see really miss it today's poll is have you ever fallen asleep while playing a video game absolutely and oh did I ever tell you my nightmare story about how I had just caught a shiny butterfree in the bug catching contest fell asleep in the battery died and I fucking kill myself it was a nightmare it was literally the butterfree that cucked ash out of his butterfree the pink one that stole it away I caught her but I let her escape just slipped away just like in the show God Pokemon horror stories are the worst I know I know I've only encountered one shiny Pokemon in my entire life and I was a playing Pokemon Emerald and it was a shiny wormhole but it was before you got Pokeballs in the game oh no oh my god evisceration right it was the worst it was like the biggest cockslap I've ever gotten by God in my life I've got a shiny cottony in Sun Moon it's the only shiny I've seen but I got it I've actually caught kind of a lot I've caught like for something over my career which for somebody who just played like I've like played every game through once but I didn't like grind for any of them so that's something I'm kind of like Ben has never seen any except for like red hair it plays more Pokemon than both of us combined so yeah as far as I know yeah it's just great yeah yeah it's pretty much the coolest idea ever fucking love it it's insane and nuts I love how low the percentage it's great I love it I don't have any more questions do we want do we want to keep it going let's do one more let's get a big finish okay the best question you want a real big epic finisher yes yes that's gonna tear our fucking listeners ears pieces I'm ready crafty asks can y'all sing my kingdom I was why don't you go I want to say that a hero can save us hopefully hopefully our wonderful editor will fade out at some point during that we're still going man don't cut it don't cut it we're still going and I guess that's true I'm just gonna say goodbye now goodbye goodbye fuck you sorry