 It's 2021, welcome to the new 21 report. I'm here with Alex from Playing with Fire. Alex, how you doing? Hey, good to be here. Yep, I'm glad you're here. Alex, give us a little description of what you do. Yeah, so I'm a dating coach, and we specialize in helping guys being able to meet girls online, but that's just the, you know, that's kind of the focus of it. But we also go broad on that, just help guys be better men in general. So what goes into meeting girls online and getting better pictures? What goes into better pictures? Getting a better shape. So we kind of just go down my rabbit hole and help men be overall better men. Okay, well, this is your first time here? My first time. Yep, so tell me about your experience at 21. It was a good experience. I mean, everything is really well organized, which is impressive. I've done conferences in the past where it's kind of a mess, like, oh, a bunch of people are on the stage and running around. So everything is well organized. There's some good speakers. Definitely met some cool guys. Yeah, overall, I'm happy. And as a first time speaker, how do men benefit from your speech and tell us about your speech? Yeah, I mean, my speech gives you a very straightforward blueprint on what you can do to start meeting girls right away. So a full A to Z strategy. Now, of course, I obviously had only an hour, so I'm not gonna go into extreme nuance, but in that speech, there's everything you need to know to successfully start meeting girls from Tinder, Bumble, whatever, today. What type of man needs this kind of guidance, help? Any man who is not happily in a relationship. So explain that a little deeper, like. If you're married and you're happy, great, you don't really need my speech. If you're out now, if you're choosing to be a priest, you don't really need my speech, although I would argue you'd probably still do. Anyone else, like if you're a single guy or you're not happy in a relationship, you probably wanna meet girls, right? And then you wanna have the tools to meet girls successfully. My speech is those tools. It doesn't give you, it doesn't do the work for you, right? But it gives you the tools that you need. Okay. Another thing I think that you have talked about on your channel and other channels are, I guess I would call them the frauds, for people to take your money, not getting what they paid for. So why don't you kind of expound on that a little? Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of dudes who use the word loosely, who yeah, who are just mainly like their main goal is money. They don't really have a tangible success or tangible results. So the question is, okay, how do you measure success? Well, you would look, for example, for me, you would look at my website, I have, I would say probably over a hundred lay reports with all the screenshots from start to finish. So you can see the girls have looked up, but now obviously we censor faces for privacy reasons, but you can still see everything else. Like you can see I've had many, many girls on my channel. You know, there's like, there's countless, countless proofs. The same thing with like, you know, my buddy John Anthony, there's countless examples. When you see a guy who's telling you, oh yeah, you know, I'm really good at this, but they have no proof. It would be the same thing as a bodybuilder saying, hey, I have this best workout program, but he's skinny, he has no muscle. It's something that doesn't add up here. So, I mean, should we get into it and like mention some names or? I'll leave that up to you. Well, I'll use, I'll use Rollo as an example, because I think he's a good one. I mean, you have a guy who's purely a keyboard jockey, right, at the end of the day. He hasn't been in the game since before the internet was even a thing. This would be like a doctor who hasn't practiced medicine in 30 years. Would you trust a doctor who hasn't practiced medicine in 30 years to do your operation? No, never. You'd be like, dude, like I want someone who actually practices medicine. For some reason, the same common sense the end doesn't apply. And then like perpetuating theories that don't really make sense. Like I'll name one, like for example, you can never talk to your girl about the number of partners you've slept with. You should keep that secret. Pure nonsense. Me and my girlfriend, I've told her many times that I've slept with hundreds of girls. She doesn't give a shit. So it's just like when you have someone who's spouting theories, who doesn't know what they're talking about and then to top it off, they're afraid to actually challenge their ideas. So I publicly challenged her for a friendly debate. Like, hey, you think this, I think that. There's some things that we agree on. Let's come on and actually talk it out and have a debate. I'm not gonna talk to you, you're just scammer. So it's basically the argument they use against them, they flip it on you, right? It's like, it's like a police to catch a thief. Like, yeah, you know, we're gonna arrest you for being a thief. Well, you're a thief officer. It doesn't make any sense. So you see a lot of that and it's just kind of love, I would say like fuckery. So yeah, I mean, I think, you know, it's kind of a shame that, and Rolo is only one of them, there's many others, but like that you have these guys and their fanboys are just like, so adamantly defending them. When these guys, they don't even want to debate you. Like, if you're, look, if you're a fan of mine and I'm not willing to debate someone, you should call me out. You should be like, you know, you're being a pussy right now. Like why are you not, why are you afraid to defend your ideas? But for some reason that standard doesn't apply. So I've always found that kind of odd. Okay. Now the word game is tossed around a lot in the managed sphere. Give me your definition of game. Game is the ability to be able to either date, sleep with, have a long-term relationship with women that you find attractive. It's as simple as that. So let's say your goal is to, you know, get into a serious relationship. If you can get into a serious relationship with a girl who meets all your standards, that's a good game. If your girl is a lot casual sex and you're able to sleep around with a lot of, you know, when you find attractive girls, that's a good game. It's as simple as that. Do you find game is manipulation? Because we hear that a lot. No, it can be, but it doesn't have to be. It also depends on how you define manipulation, but it doesn't necessarily need to be. It's more like persuasion. So let's say I'm doing sales, right? Let's say I'm selling, I don't know. I used to sell solar panels way back when. It's a fun little fact about me. And let's say that you want to buy solar panels for your house, but you're not sure which company you want to go with and I make a really good argument why I should go with my company. And you're like, yeah, you know, this makes sense and you buy it. You would say I manipulated you. You would say I persuaded you. But let's say I lied to you about my panels. I say, yeah, these are the best panels, you know, they're going to work for a hundred years and they break down the first year. Then you would say I manipulated you. So it can be manipulation, but it doesn't have to be. Like my game is not manipulation. I don't lie or cheat or deceive girls by the very persuasive. Do you think the word manipulation usually implies lying? Because that seems to be a kind of a narrative. It has a negative connotation. If you can use the word manipulation in a non-negative way, in which case I think it applies, but the way most people in turbo manipulation is in a negative deceiving type of way. Now there's going to be a guy out there, guy out there that's watching this right now that is not doing well with women, is not progressing in that, we'll say department of his life. So I want you to talk to that guy and give him some Alex playing with fire advice. Let's do it. So it can definitely be frustrating, right? So you're in a place right now where just, you know, things haven't been going well and you might be tempted to come to the conclusion that game doesn't work or game doesn't work for you, right? I would make this analogy. Think about a guy who's gone to the gym for a few months and he hasn't been following good workout program. He hasn't put on any muscle. Would it be fair for that guy to say bodybuilding doesn't work? No, he just hasn't been following the right plan. You're in the same boat. It's not a perfect analogy, but somewhat similar. So I would say you have all your life to give up. You can give up a few years from now. Try some of the stuff that I'm saying. Try some of the stuff that John Anthony, one of the other speakers of the event has been saying. Give it a shot and give it an honest shot. Don't go into it a half ass. Like actually try it and commit to it. What's the worst that can happen? You give up a year later. Okay, like whatever, right? But it will work because I've had clients, whoever you are, I've probably had clients worse off than you. I've coached guys that were virgins. I've coached guys that were depressed and suicidal. I've coached guys that were super short. I've coached guys that were super minorities. Like whatever you think of it, I've probably coached a guy like that. Now I'm not gonna say that it works for 100% of people, but it doesn't work for 98, 99% of people. I would say something like that. So just like bodybuilding works for 99% of people. If you're missing an arm and a leg, you're not gonna put on that much muscle. Even though there are some exceptions to that, there's like fucking guys who are missing arms or are jacked. But it's gonna be a lot harder, right? But for 99% of people watching this, you can succeed if you put in enough work. And so what my stuff is, is the tools, the work part is on you though. Excellent, Alex, how can everybody find you? Yeah, check out my YouTube channel, Playing with Fire Dating. Check out, watch our Instagram, I'm just thinking now. Check out websiteplayingfire.com. We have a free tips and guides section. We have literally anything you want information on. We have free articles on it. We have forums, forums.playingfire.com where you can ask questions and get them answered by me for free. So we have a lot of resources for our fans to take advantage of. I wish I had this stuff when I was actually learning game, but it exists now, so take advantage of it. Excellent, Alex, we appreciate you at 21. Thank you for having me. Thanks for being on the 20-Hand Report. Appreciate you. Anytime.