 We want to welcome you again to another empowering edition of Pinoy Power Hawaii. And again, we express our gratitude to Think Tech over E for allowing us to come to your homes and share with you empowering topics and issues that affects or we can benefit from our show today. We are so fortunate to have BFF Sisterhood today to tell us and share us their heartwarming stories of how they keep their friendships alive. And hopefully by what we are about to share today you will be in line with our mission. We aim to enrich, enlighten, educate, entertain, and of course the big picture is to empower. So today we're going to have a conversation about BFF Sisterhood and we have in the studio our guests. First of all Karen is an anchor at our Pinoy Power radio and she hosts a healing Hawaii every Sunday at 7 to 8 p.m. So welcome to our show Karen. Mahalo Emmy. So great to be here. Thank you. And we also have of course Christine. Yes. Welcome to the show. Nice to see you. Nice to be with you. Thank you. Last but not least we have Monica. Yes. To help us with our empowerment. So we will begin our conversation. Tell us a little bit about how you grew up and how your friendship started and how it blossomed. Well I think we became friends because we all went to school together. Yes. But they went to school together from elementary or intermediate school, right? Sacred Hearts Convent. Sacred Hearts means we have the same. I don't know about that. I don't know about that. Okay. Then I got to meet them because we all ended up at Sacred Hearts Academy for high school and and then that's where we met. Yes. Yeah. But we weren't really close in high school. Right. We knew each other but we didn't really become really close friends until years later after high school. I would say. Yeah. I would think it was after one of our reunions. I won't say that the year. You're dating yourself. Yeah. One of the retreats and things like that. But we all had different groups in high school. So we all had we all belong to different friendship groups. Right. But like for some reason like. Well church. Yeah. Then things brought us together. Of course. It kind of brought us back together. In our we call it our our peer pressure group or our gang. Yeah. Right. Yeah. But nothing was clickish. We all loved each other. We just had the dancers and the straight A students and you know the cheerleaders and would you none of those. Yeah. So different category. Yeah. Yeah. Since you were friends the longest tell us what it was like growing up together. Were you like did you form a sisterhood like sisters where you shared anything and everything. And well like Karen had mentioned we have become close sisters because of the bonds that we have formed since Facebook. I should say social media. Yeah. Really connect us. Reconnect us. Yes. Reconnect us. And so since you know slowly but surely two three four ten of us now together. Yes. And we always get together. We go out to wine events at each other's houses. Other things school events we've gone to. Yeah. I think it's through our class reunions and through our high school bonds and the foundation we got at school with God and our Catholic upbringing. Right. That when we started to grow up and through the years and using social media to reconnect us it helped us because as you age you go through life and life can be tough and hard and you kind of like need to lean on your childhood friends and your sisterhood. Yeah. So it really helped us to go through the thing. Right. Yeah. And Stacey Ayres who's not here with us today. Yeah. Stacey. We had a conversation this morning which was spot on is like God brings people in your life for seasons and he always brought us back together. You know whether someone got married moved to the mainland and when he brought us back together in the new season it was like we never left each other side. Like you just kind of pick off pick up from where you left off and it didn't feel like you were disconnected for five years or six years or whatever it was. You know. So I think it was just the foundation the sisterhood. Yes. Sacred Hearts Academy. Yes. Yeah. So share with us. When did you know that you could rely on each other whether it was good or bad especially for you to where you started your friendship at a very early age because sometimes there are what we call false friends who are there to you know suck energy or get information just to put you down so that they look good. That's very true. I think both of us were easygoing. Totally. Yeah. We go with the flow you know. So everyone to make friends and I think that some people were a little bit separated maybe not have the same likes or dislikes but as far as me and Monica and me and Karen we definitely have the same likes and dislikes and even if you know some of that wasn't the same we still could lean on each other. We could trust our bonds with not like maybe seeing it outside of our group or perhaps you know just keeping that in line with inside of ourselves like we're going to we're going to help out each other. We're going to be able to get through this together and without any external type of influences I would say. Right. Right. And I think it's maturity. I'm sure I talk for the three of us we've had friendships from youth you know to now and you have those friends that suck the energy out of you. You have the drama or the negativity and as you get older you only have so much time in your life. So you want to make sure that friendships that you have are quality and you need to know who to let go of and who to keep next to you in your circle you know who you can depend on and I and I think doing our why to Kai has brought us even closer together because I know I can lean on them there's no judgment you know there's honesty it can be transparent and tell them how I feel they might not agree with everything that I think or I'm doing but they're there to love me and support me you know and that's that's that good security good security of knowing that I can come to them and they won't judge me or turn their back that they will be a ear to listen. That is so heartwarming to hear that you have that bond of like unconditional love which helps to sustain you. I grew up on the island of La Naye so everybody lives in a glass house where everyone knows what's going on what you're doing which boy you're going out with which boy you stayed out with that kind of thing was there ever a time in your life or you had those crushes and a boy got in between or friendship you're right not us particularly. Describe what you saw growing up that helped you to learn from watching that experience because I know that sometimes those type of high school romance kind of getting the way where you know I've witnessed several friendships and it's hurtful you know because you trust and you love that person and you feel that you know that's your best friend but with maturity because back then you don't understand it as you grow you're like okay that wasn't true friendship because a friend would not turn their back on you you know true you or you could communicate but when you're young you don't know how to communicate exactly you keep it all inside right and as you get older it's like there's no sense in going back and talking about that issue so you just got to forgive and forgive and let go true and not hold on to it that's true our Monica that's easier to say because we we can look back and we have wisdom and experience that makes us wiser but what was difficult for me was all the name-calling bullying so I came from the Philippines where I didn't speak good English and I was always bullied and put down I got called Manang or you know Bagua all kinds of derogatory so I'm not sure if you experienced that type of bullying name-calling and had these challenges growing up because that kind of stops you or suppresses you from doing your best. Chris can share. I moved there on a lot I had family here in Hawaii my mom worked for the airline so I traveled back and forth and so yes because I spoke really good English I came from the mainland I'd go back and forth summer school I'd come here and when I was really young they tease me and and all of that it started in Sacred Hearts convent but it got easily much more easy down the line yeah I made friendships very easily and then that all went away yeah so of course we live and we learn it took me a while to open myself up because I was bullied a little bit yes called names right there and that was very hurtful so I think that that did hinder me but I think I came back strong and as I got older you know it was very easy for me to make friends so I got over that and I did have expensive bullying and an elementary and intermediates well I think most people do have some sort of experience with that but what saved me or helped me was friends like you have the bullies that bully you but then you also have people that stick up for you or that support you or that you really can count on and those are the ones that get you through yes you haven't done those yeah and having those true friends yeah yes in my case there were a lot of older guys that came to my rescue because they were the one that were able to stand up to the really the big Tita yeah I will meet you in the back of the gym yeah yeah or they would take things away from me and I felt so defenseless because I was so fearful because you came from another country yes a different language so it was probably more obstacles to connect exactly but did you have female friends that came to for your support there were yes but because of the peer pressure like oh you better not take her side yeah you know yeah yeah so that type of bullying kind of stuck with me yeah but later on I learned to develop tools that I would use so that I would stand out rather than continue being bullied. Yeah, that probably comes out naturally I would think. I know exactly what you're talking about, yes. Okay, so we can talk about that in the next portion of our program. Again, we appreciate you tuning into our weekly show where we can learn from past experiences and how we can apply these tools that help us to shape our lives and live a more positive life. So we will return after our short break and again you're listening to Pinoy Power Hawaii. Thank Tech Hawaii. When I was growing up, I was among the one in six American kids who struggled with hunger. But with the power of breakfast, the kids in your neighborhood can think big and be more. Go to hungarees.org to make breakfast happen for kids in your neighborhood. Welcome back to Pinoy Power Hawaii. And again, our discussion for this episode is about BFF, sisterhood, how we can learn from our real life experiences, the lessons that we learn growing up and how to apply them to benefit our family members and our friends. So we're having a hard to discussion with, of course, Karen, Christine and Monica who are honest. So that the lessons that we learn from our childhood can be applied to our immediate family, especially our children who, you know, in this world where it's a fast-moving society there's so many things going on and we realize so much on technology to kind of help raise our children. But that's not good enough. How are you raising your family and how are you using the tools that you've learned that help you to cope and help you to better yourself in today's very demanding and very competitive society. Yeah, it's super hard. I have a daughter at Sacred Hearts and social media. It really affects young women. You know, they're makes them insecure. You look at that. You want this and you need to look like that. But I always made sure for my son and my daughter that I knew who their friends were because their friends were a reflection of who they were going to be. Exactly. And I always loved my children's friends. My daughter has great friendships that she's building at Sacred Hearts, like how we did. And when I see that and I see what we build, I'm like so excited for her future because she's going to have these women that they grow together. Where they go off to college, they're going to come back together in life no matter what. But it's just for me is I have an open honest relationship. My daughter can't talk to me about anything and I love that. You know, I don't want to be where she can't come to me. You know, some of the things she tells me I don't agree with and I don't like, but she can share with me. Okay, so when she shares your things that you don't quite agree with, do you react or judge her? No, no. Okay. The way I have my friendships is no judgment because if I judge her, right, she's not going to open up to me. She's going to, right. Yes, yes. So I kind of have, she's my daughter, we have a mother-daughter relationship, but we still have a friendship and I try never to judge her and just be really open and honest and transparent with her. Sometimes it's hard to do and not to react. Yes, yes. But Monica is good because she also guides her though. She always guides her and gives her guidance and advice without judgment. Without judgment, yeah. Just being honest and giving her advice and guidance. It based on our experiences going up too, right? Right. You learn from your experiences then you pass that off. Right. And then, you know, my experience is going to all girls' school. Right. You know, she's going to all girls' school. Right. And the things I went through, negative and positive, I share with her. You know, sometimes she probably won't get it. She's 17 years old, but one day she will understand. You know, she's like, I'm not like that mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Eventually she'll go, oh, I was. Yeah, okay. So, Christine, can you relate to? I currently can't because I do not have a child. I have four babies. Okay. But as far as my stepfather recently passed away, so it's my mother relating with my mom. I think that I learned friendships and relationships through her. She has lots of friends. She's good friends with all her neighbors, her classmates. She still gets together with Farrington High School classmates, which are awesome. Gold governor. Yeah. So, I like to see that. And I think I learned from that as well and slowly but surely we're building our group. And I think that we have a really good close-knit friendship with the, I think it's about 10 to 12 of us right now. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we want more and more of our classmates to come together. But you know, everybody's so busy. Right. They have kids and families. But we need it more than ever. We do, you know, with the demands of society. Yes. I kind of tune into Karen's show from time to time just to hear what she's talking about. And when I listen to her show, she always bring, you know, her faith into the show. And I know that that's a big part of your success. So Karen, tell us about that and how you interject your constant faith into your life to make you a better person. Thank you for that, by the way. I mean, and I think we got it at school because we went to a Catholic school. And so that you can have prayer in school. You have a relationship. You get to know Jesus. You have a relationship with God. So that gave us a foundation for that. And whether you go to Christian or other paths, spiritual paths, you have that foundation and that relationship already established from school. And for me, throughout life, I explored different avenues of religions and spirituality. But my mom was very devout Catholic. And I have to not want to cry, but I have to take care of her. And when she passed away, um, thank you. Going back to the Catholic Church and reconnecting with my Catholic faith that I grew up with, helped me connect to my mom. So, and then it helped me connect to my sisterhood, too, because that's where we all met and grew up together. So it helped me with that as well. Yeah. So, so in my show, I start my show with a prayer. Right. And I'm open to any prayer that the guests can bring. But usually I start with our father because that's my roots and my Catholic upbringing, my Christian upbringing. Always. Yeah. And it just kind of gives you a foundation to kind of take a breath and downshift from the craziness of the world and connect to our creator. Yeah. Yeah. I can relate to that. Right. It's all about faith building and keeping. We know that there's a higher power. We know that, uh, God, all my father guides us, direct us and, uh, make sure that we are, uh, taking care of. So, uh, I wanted to just quickly, uh, ask you folks how, how does that fit in your life? And how do you, uh, you know, sometimes our children don't like to talk about religion, you know, because, uh, it's not, it's not a cool thing. So, uh, tell us, Monica, how do you do that? Well, um, I was, like, brought up in Catholic Church and at 10, we, um, a whole family changed over to Christian. We went to, um, uh, a very, like, wonderful Christian church. Um, and then at one point in my life, I kind of just walked away. So, my son went to church with me and he has a foundation and he knows everything and he still, to this day, as an adult, gonna get married and he knows that God is good and God is center. Not my daughter. But you never walked away during school, though. Not during school, yeah. It was just as in my, uh, in my adult life, you know, you know, you went through a divorce and you just kind of just, like, give up on whatever and you just kind of go down a different path. And, um, doing that why Takai helped me come back to my roots, you know. And so now, not bringing my daughter up the way I was and my son was, um, I can't force upon that upon her. I have to lead by an example. So just, you know, lead in prayer, be a better mom, um, watch my tongue, how I treat people. I need to be an example for her because as a teenager, they know. You don't know. I know everything, right? That's their mentality. So you can't force anything upon them. You just have to lead by example. So that's what I'm, I'm doing now is just trying to lead by example and be the best mother, friend, you know, sister that I can be in. Hopefully she sees the God in me. Right. And, and, and that she will be on her spiritual path. She goes to see her heart. So they, she gets the foundation there. Right. But, and I think that has strengthened our relationship too, because we pray together. Yeah. So as friends, we pray. Right. We make Karen pray all the time. And they don't make the word for it. But we pray too. Yes. She goes, does anybody pray and be like, Karen? She actually brings it out of us. Yeah, she does. Yeah. But then that helps because it really strengthens our bond when you have faith between your friends. Yeah, it does. It really strengthened us. And Monica's talking about why to cry. Yeah. What's the why to cry? So that is by is fresh water. Right. Is ocean salt water. Right. And we did this thing. And actually today is the first day of the Poi Poi moons, which is a fuller moons in Hawaiian lunar calendar. And the last time we had the Poi Poi moons, we did this practice called why to cry, which is you touch fresh water, stream water in the morning. And then you touch ocean water, salt water in the afternoon evening. And it's kind of like a completion of a cycle. And you be kind to the water, the water is a metaphor for yourself. And we did it as a sister. And we prayed at the water, whether alone or with each other. But we did this 10 day journey during the Poi Poi moons, touching fresh water and touching ocean water. And it really changed many of us and opened us up. And we use prayer as part of that. And that strengthened our friendship so much. Because it was so awesome. Because it was such an amazing journey. Who would have thought that a 10 days of, you know, I didn't even understand what I was doing. But that first morning we prayed together, just kind of bonded us. And like two, three days later, like God was showing things to in my life. I was like, Wow. It was like an awakening. Yes. That's the source of light. And the water just like, you, I don't know, touching the the Aina, the land, the water. It cleanses you, isn't it? Oh my gosh. Yes. It's like the power of prayer between the three of us. Loving it to agreement, you know, it makes a perfect combination. Now, the people who are listening, who wants to be a part of this white tukai. Yes. How could they become a, be a part of that? Well, how I found out about it was through Tom Penna, who's with Homai Kapono. Homai Kapono. And he runs regular workshops on lunar phases and Hawaiian moons and Hawaiian place and time. And it was suggested to me to do this practice to see what it would stir inside of me and what would be revealed to me just from touching the stream and touching the ocean. And so I go to his workshops regularly at the Manoa Heritage Center, but people can go to Homai Kapono. I think it's homaikapono.org or .com. I think it's .org and they could go, go Homai Kapono and check it out. And they have workshops regularly about the lunar phases and Hawaiian moons. And this is part of that practice. Wow. Yeah. It just an awakening for me how the water around us affect us. The fresh water and the sea water or salt water. Because we are mostly water. And the old and the land, the earth, the world is mostly water. That's correct. Yeah. So it's amazing how that connection just reveals stuff in you because we had all, we all had revelations during that 10-day thing. So yeah, it was really special. That is so awesome. And I want to thank all three of you for coming to our show to shed some light and, of course, empowerment. This is really powerful when we share experiences, we share not so much a secret, but true to life tools that we use, you use in your daily life to help turn negative things into something wonderful and positive. And that is what we need in today's world. Thank you again and make God bless you. Thank you so much for having us. We want to thank you once again for joining us for Pinoy Power Hawaii. And we encourage you to continue watching the shows where we have real guests where they are open to share their life's experiences and from the situations and for what we share with you. We hope to fulfill a mission to enrich, enlighten, educate, entertain, and we hope to empower you. But I mean, salamat, million mahalos to think that Hawaii for giving us this opportunity. Until next time, amabuhay and mahalo.