 the narcissist parent will ruin your life part two the narcissist parent will create fantasy they will do this because they want to be seen in a different way it could be someone they want to be more like or it could be something that they always wanted a large muscular man a successful music artist or a beautiful woman you may desire one of these yourself and this is why the narcissist parent plays the part it is also because they feel like they're not good enough as they are they are slaves to their desires which can never be fulfilled narcissists are often very successful people in the beginning look at any narcissist who is famous and you will see that this is true after their initial success you see them holding on to it for the rest of their lives never really progressing just holding on to what they once had they are not capable of long-term success in anything and this is why you will find yourself holding on to what you saw in the beginning because you know that they are not capable of further success this is it this is as good as it gets with them and that is why they don't even bother trying to make it work they won't even waste their time think about it if they really believed they were capable of making it work they would at least try to make it happen that is another reason why they become narcissists they want so much more but they know they cannot do any better so it results in them self-sabotaging becoming hateful angry and envious of your progression or success on the surface they sing they seem so self assured and confident but this is nothing more than a mask the real person has no self-belief at least not long-term they can pretend and put on an act for a short period of time but most of it is just words and they have no ability to follow up with action they don't want you to help them they just want you to try to help them that gives them narcissistic supply they are willing to destroy themselves and sacrifice their own future if it will emotionally and psychologically damage you they see themselves as much greater than they actually are but they see their lives as being less valuable than your feelings your emotional state is everything to them it determines everything they do and everything they say because their lives revolve around provoking a certain emotion within you and then obtaining a reaction from that emotion this is a form of narcissistic supply and it shows how greatly they value your life if they are willing to invest so much time and effort into trying to destroy it the saddest thing about the narcissist parent is that although they all end up alone and miserable in the end they once actually had all of the tools they needed to create everything they always wanted they just didn't see it they were too busy taking advantage of their scapegoat child and their emotional state sabotaging their future rather than focusing on building a life that they could be proud of and focusing on progressing in life so they will feed you something to dream about years go by and nothing really changes you might develop an awareness of this and realize that after so many years nothing has changed so they will point out things they have done for you like they have given more than you have but think back to the beginning all of the things they told you all of the plans for the future did any of that ever happen no they were all empty promises that they never planned to fulfill so focus on the present did you ever dream for any of this i can bet that this was never what you expected and it was never what you wanted it was also nothing that the narcissist ever mentioned in the beginning remember everything they promised you think back and remember it all when you do that and then look at your current situation with them you will have every reason to no longer view them as a credible source they don't want to do the work to help you improve your life and to be honest they don't even want to see you progress anyway so what do they do they give up that's their mentality if they feel like they're not capable of doing something they won't even try they just give up as you are becoming a teenager and finding your identity the narcissist parent will put you down they will make you feel as though you have no right to be happy the narcissist parent does not want you to have a relationship i always noticed my father was very angry and insulted when i started being around girls every girl i have ever met who knew of him has said the same thing he didn't like me talking to or being around girls yes narcissist parents are extremely envious of their scapegoat child and any relationships or even friendships which they may have it's because the narcissist parent didn't meet as many girls as they wanted to at that age or did meet any it's because the narcissist parent didn't have many friendships at that age and felt alone and isolated so now any relationships or friendships you have will be met with hate anger envy and sabotage they will target your self-perception try to make you see yourself differently using devaluation tactics they will criticize the way you look the way you talk the way you walk how you dress anything you are interested in if you ask them what they actually do like about you they would struggle to name even one quality but you know what there are good qualities in every person so that is how you know that they are intentionally only looking for the bad in you they aren't looking at you from a balanced perspective so they could never see anything good about you even if they tried so they will target and distort your self-perception and only see what they want to see from a negative view they will also distort your perception of the people around you this could be other people in your family your friends or a partner anyone who likes to spend time with you is instantly devalued by the narcissist parent if they like you or want to spend time around you the narcissist parent feels like they are taking you away from them they are losing their pet their slave their primary source of narcissistic supply the narcissist parent does not want to share your attention and validation of them with anyone else they are also extremely envious of you having any friendships or relationships because of their post-traumatic stress response ptsr from when they were around your age anything you obtain which the narcissist parent felt limited in as a child or young adult automatically triggers their ptsr if the narcissist parent struggles to change your perception of the people around you and you continue to spend time with them they are left with only one other option to create a smear campaign the purpose of the smear campaign is to make everyone around you see you the same way that the narc parent sees you this is designed to isolate you and prevent you from establishing any new friendships or relationships this can have a highly damaging effect on your social circle and potentially the community in which you live in the smear campaign promotes narcissism not only will everyone see you the same way but everyone will soon begin to act in the same way as the narcissist parent it will seem as though everyone is developing narcissistic traits and unfortunately they are just ask yourself what kind of person will change their beliefs of you before you've even met they base their opinions and impressions of you from what they have viewed from the narcissist parent this means that they are fly monkeys apaths or enablers they enable the abuse and manipulation to take place it's all about isolation and prevention of financial resources the narcissist parent wants to keep you all to themselves forever and any awakened individual who tries to come between that will be devalued along with you the narcissist parent is an exhibitionist sometimes they want to be the star the center of attention other times they will want the scapegoat child to be the star and take all of the attention this isn't attending for the scapegoat child to shine though the narcissist parent wants to exploit and humiliate the scapegoat child the narcissist parent is laughing behind the scenes thinking yes now you know how it feels to feel like an alien isolated struggling now you have to experience everything I had to go through but for you it is a hundred times worse now I feel relieved from my post-traumatic stress of what I had to experience as a child they want to recreate all of the misery which they had to deal with just so they can watch the scapegoat experience it again and again their stress doesn't seem so bad now because what the scapegoat child is going through is far worse than anything the narcissist parent ever had to deal with the scapegoat slight has to appear worse to the narcissist parent so that the traumas from their youth doesn't seem as bad the narcissist parents behaviors stems from someone who never had a proper childhood and never had the chance to experience many relationships or friendships the narcissist parent likely struggled financially alone and isolated so now they want to take their most fortune out on their scapegoat child who could possibly grow up doing the same thing to their child it is a sick twisted thing to do robbing your own child's youth it's worse than any physical or even sexual abuse the psychological damage and effects on their life are far worse yeah you can heal from both physical and sexual abuse but this this goes on for life because it is an endless effort to stop you from healing the narcissist parent knows that if they stop abusing you or stop using their manipulative tactics you will recover eventually you will escape from their web of misery find new relationships and even have a career you will soon become a reminder of everything they never were everything and they never got to experience and that is just too much for the narcissist parent to bear i've noticed they never want you to leave the abusive situation they will give you what you need so that you can remain in the same circumstances giving them the opportunity to continue the abuse but they will never give you enough to leave if you are working or receiving money from somewhere and you do have enough to leave they will steal it from you or trick you into giving that money to them they will even put restraints on you to make it impossible for you to leave and they will give simulations and illusions of love as though they are given to you but the best way to know if you are dealing with someone that ever cared or loved you is to look at what they give to themselves and then compare that with what they give to you a narcissist will never want any form of equality in a relationship whether it's friends future relationships or material things you must always have less than what they have they will always be the priority and you will never be deserving of any equality for many victims this lasts for their entire lifetime it is their entire conscious experience all they will ever know their life to be once you become a teenager that is when the envy begins they get they didn't get the chance to meet girls or boys at that age it's when you do it's like how dare you how dare you meet those girls how dare you meet those boys i never got to do any of that when i was your age so you should not be doing it you should not be experiencing that from that point on they basically just want you to die because you have reminded them of everything that they never got to do the main reasons why they don't kill you is because they need you for narcissistic supply you are somewhere for them to dump their toxic shame to shift their blame and project insecurities you are their emotional punching bag someone to carry their emotional baggage which they are too weak to deal with honestly what the narcissist parent does is far worse than murder they are sick twisted calculative sadistic emotional predators everything is designed for you to fail and they will set a backup just so they can watch you fail again and again because they failed when they were around your age they messed up really bad and they never found a way to resolve those traumatic events so now it's your turn you must feel the pain the narcissist parent fell back then but you're not going to feel the pain just once no you're going to feel that pain and experience their misery every day for the rest of your life because anytime you are not miserable or failing is a reminder to the narcissist parent of all of the calamities they faced in their early lives and while all of this is happening to you the narcissist parent feels tears of joy thinking yes relive it for me so i can watch you suffer just as i once did but once is never enough for the narcissist parent it has to be done again and again with no end just as there is no end to their pain trauma or misery there will only be an end if they find happiness in themselves there will only be an end if they find truth in themselves but no they rather project their past traumatic experiences onto you they choose to project their emotions and insecurities onto you yes the ultimate example of a coward and while they're doing this they will still play the victim role while they abuse and manipulate you with no end they could be stabbing you with a knife while crying and asking you why are you hurting them that is how ridiculous their thinking is they live in denial because reality is too painful for them to accept the narcissist parent will tell their scapegoat child you are not good enough for anyone or anything but when they say this it doesn't say anything about you because they're just projecting how they feel about themselves they know that they're not good enough and that's why they cannot be their true selves so as you begin your path of bettering yourself and finding your true identity the narcissist parent cannot handle this they will tell you that the real you is fake that's not who you are you are the weak low confident person that they made you yeah that's what they want you to believe only you will know when you are on the right track and becoming who you really are and they will try to put you back in your place try to get you to be the person that they want you to be they feel more comfortable that way but you need to find the real you your true self develop your self-esteem self-worth and self-respect rebuild your boundaries and practice self-love rather than the self-hate you were taught as a child by the narcissist parent self-love is your greatest defense against the the narcissist parent thank you