 Good morning everybody, welcome back to another vlog. Today is Friday and it is one week until we leave for the UK. So I feel like it's really crunch time here. I'm looking for a tripod to put you on. I am getting ready momentarily to head out the door because I have a nail appointment. We're actually, I know this might sound like a little bit extreme, but we are like locking down for a week before we go on our trip because I got sick when we went to Japan and then subsequently Drew got sick because we were running around crazy going to all different appointments again, our haircut, getting this and that done. And I also went to a Taylor Swift concert. So I did end up getting sick during our trip to Japan because the Taylor Swift concert was like two days before our trip. I don't know if that's how I got sick because getting sick in like a day and a half is kind of crazy, but anyways, I'm not taking any chances. So as of today, we are after this appointment and then I have to go to the doctor on Monday but it's the ENT and like that was the only time they could get me in. Anyways, we are like not doing anything. So we're getting everything done today. I also have a branded video that I need to edit and submit for approval today. And that's like top priority, like top, top, top priority. So it's 9.23, my appointment's at 10, but I thought I was gonna like, I don't know. I never know what to do for my nails. And I wish that you were just like, I wish I was live streaming and that you could decide with me. So I'm gonna go on Pinterest and search. This is like basically what I do every time I get my nails done. I'm gonna do like fall 2023 nail inspo. And we will just see what comes up. We're gonna pick it out together. It does have to match like all of my outfits. And I've seen a lot of really cute like browns and stuff, but I just did brown. And like there's the brown with the chrome, which I guess I could do. There's also these like tortoise shell kind of nails, like tortoise, you know, like sunglasses and stuff. That's cute, but I don't know if like they can do that. I don't really like trying new things right before I like need to go out of town and can't come back and have them fix it or whatever. I thought about doing just like clear nail polish with chrome on it. Cause I think that looks really cute. I like this green as well. Like the green is very, very cute. So I don't know. There's like black cherry colors that are really cute. Silver, white is always just a classic. Is that boring if I just do white, but it matches everything. And I just, I love a white nail. A lot of the like TikTok girlies are calling these nails chocolate glazed donuts. And it's like this sort of brown, chromey kind of thing that's very popular at the moment. But like, I don't think that would look good on my skin tone. I did this the last time I went to the UK. I did like brown tips, which is really cute. And that would be kind of, you know, oh, like a little callback to my last trip to the UK. I love this color. This sort of like caramel, like orangey kind of color. And that would be really cute with my hair. I'm gonna screenshot that and like see if they have anything like that. I do like this. This is sort, I think this is just like a clear or just a really sheer color with chrome. I like that too. So I'm gonna screenshot that as well. And then we'll just decide from there. I need to get going. I need to pack myself a little snack, pack my headphones that have been charging. And we talk about this like every single time I get my nails done, but it's just, it's not fun. I don't enjoy it. It's not self-care for me. It's torturous. I have to like pull up a podcast or do something and listen to it for the entire hour plus however long it is because it makes me miserable. I'm gonna scroll through a few more. Ooh, like a hunter green would be really cute. Like a forest green. That would kind of slide too. Okay. Those are my three choices. So we're gonna either do, I already forgot. Oh, like a burnt orangey kind of like caramel sort of like warm brown color. Maybe a forest green or maybe clear with chrome. That's the direction we're going in. We'll see. Good morning. Let's do it. Oh my God, I'm dying from the hand sanitizer fumes but we're good. We did our nails. They're very natural. I'm like, okay, I'm very pale at the moment. So they will look better once I have a bit more of a tan. But I just wanted something neutral. I was looking at like the dark greens and I was like, it's not Christmas time yet. And this way they'll just be nice and neutral and simple, shimmery. I really like them. I think they're cute. So yeah, now I'm gonna head home. Why is the lighting so bad? I'm gonna head home and get this editing done. And my hope is like it's 11 a.m. right now. So I'm hoping by like four I'll be done editing. Maybe five. It depends on like how much extra stuff I need to do with the video. But anyways, nails are done. I'm feeling accomplished. That was the last thing I needed to do before the trip and we will catch up in a bit. All right, hello everybody. It is actually Monday. And I did not like, okay, there's so much to say. I rolled out of bed this morning and brushed my teeth and went out the door. I'm currently at the doctor's office. We will get into that in a moment. But I just, it's 11, 15 a.m. Just pulled into the doctor's office. And I just made a round trip trip to Disneyland this morning because it's a long story, but basically for Disneyland, and this is like obviously so trivial. It's stupid. Drew and I feel like the biggest idiots. This was almost really bad, but basically Drew and I have annual passes. Well, they're called magic keys now to Disneyland, which is just that you can like pretty much go whenever you want. There's different levels to like, there are different tiers to the passes or whatever. And so we have had passes since like 2019. And then during 2020, the park shut down for like a year. And then they changed the entire system to this new magic key thing. And so basically as of right now, they're only allowing people to renew their passes. You're not allowed to like buy any new passes because they're at max capacity. So our passes expired yesterday and we weren't paying attention. And you have 30 days, which we also didn't know. You have 30 days before your pass expires to renew it. So I mean, that's on us. We've never renewed a pass before. We've only bought new ones if that makes sense because we had one and then it took a break because the park closed down and then they changed the system. So we had to buy a new one and like anyways, so we've never renewed and we just thought like, oh, it's like something's gonna pop up and be like, do you wanna renew your pass? Or you're gonna like get an email that's like, and that never happened. And we've just had a lot going on and like completely spaced out. And so this morning I woke up and realized, oh my God, our Disneyland passes expired yesterday. So I was like, it'll be fine. Like I went on the website. Oh no, no, no, no, that's not a thing. Once your pass has expired, that's it. You don't get another pass. Like you don't get an opportunity. So I was like, oh no, I was like Drew, we fucked up. So we called and they were like, there is actually nothing we can do for you. And they don't just like regularly have, you know, oh, on this day we're gonna release more passes. It's just random and like you really have to be on it. No one cares about this, but this is just what happened to me this morning. So anyway, we got, when we were on the phone with the Disney representative, she was like basically your only option, and because today is like the next day, like the day after it expired, your only option is to drive to Disneyland and go to the ticket booth and plead your case with them. And she was like, I can't even guarantee that they're gonna say yes, they're very strict, but there is a possibility that they'll make an exception if you explain your situation, whatever. And like I, you know, going into the situation, I was like, this is my mistake. Like Drew and I are two adults, you know? We have two combined brains, okay? This was just a total fluke. So I was like, shit, I have my doctor's appointment this morning at 1140 to get my freaking hole punched in my ear, we'll talk about it. And I was like, I don't think we're gonna have enough time, it was probably like 730 at the time that we were realizing this. And you know, when we got off the phone with the Disney person, so Drew was like, let's just do it. So we hopped in the car, it took us an hour and 15 minutes in morning traffic to get to Disneyland, which honestly isn't even that bad. We've, it's taken us two hours to get there before. So we get there, we park in downtown Disney, we are power walking. We have our masks on, cause we're like trying not to go anywhere. Like I said earlier in this vlog, we are going to England in like four days. So anyway, we have our masks on, we're making our way through the crowd, we're doing our thing. And we get up to the counter and we tell them what's going on and they were like, yeah, no, like there's no, you're not gonna, you're not gonna get them. And we were like, that's totally okay. Like we just thought we would check, you know, that's what they told us to do on the phone. And they just kept being like, why didn't you renew your passes? And I was like, I just, I'm so sorry, I didn't, I wasn't paying it. I didn't know how the system worked. I had never done it before. Like I was just really unfamiliar. And I was like, it's totally my fault. And she was like, let me go, hold on, I'll be right back. She went and grabbed someone. This other lady came up and was just like, why didn't you, I was like, I, listen girl, I get it. It's our bad, we feel so stupid. Then that lady was like, I'm gonna go talk to my manager. He's gonna have to come talk to you. We were like, okay. And then we were just waiting and waiting. We weren't even talking to each other. I was literally just sitting there with my eyes down to the floor, like you fucking idiot. Then all of a sudden the first lady comes back and is like, yeah, he's gonna make a one-time exception, but this absolutely cannot happen again. And I was like, it will never, it will never happen again. Like now we know how it works. We know that we need to be the ones. I was just like, I am so sorry. And she was like, you're not gonna be able to get in today. And we were like, oh, we don't need to go right now. We just literally just drove here. And she was like, you drove here from LA? And I was like, yes. So we're good for the next year. Crisis averted, but oh my God, do we feel stupid? Like the whole time, there and back. Even on the way there, we were like, we accept our fate. If they don't let us, I mean, that's, of course, it's our fault. We were just like, let's just try. We were just laughing on the way back. Like we literally just drove to Disneyland and back. Like now I dropped Drew back off. He's been working from his phone and cause he had to be there. We had to give our IDs and all that kind of stuff. And now I'm at the doctor for my appointment. I actually need to head inside in a few minutes, but now I hate that I'm like filming this long clip with this like messy, but no one cares. Anyway, I'm not gonna apologize for how I look. I have to get a hole punched in my eardrum because I took a flight six months ago. My ears severely plugged up on that flight. And then it never unplugged. So I have been having pain and just like irritation and a blocked ear for the last almost seven months now. And we are flying on Friday. So this is what my doctor suggested. And I'm so nervous. Like, but honestly, this whole fiasco this morning was kind of well timed because he really took my mind off things. I feel so stupid. Anyway, I'm gonna head inside. I'm gonna be so, so brave. I'm gonna do my very best. Keep your fingers crossed that it's just gonna go by really fast and it's gonna be really, really easy and painless. Let's see. Good morning. It is actually the next day. It's now Tuesday. And yeah, I feel like I struggle sometimes with like saying how I'm actually feeling in vlogs because you know, a lot of people are like social media isn't real life. Influencers or content creators, they never share their struggles. They only share like the highlight reel and stuff. But then when you do share the stuff, that's like anything but glimmering, glittery, positive. It's like, you're so negative. All you do is complain, blah, blah, blah. So keep in mind, I'm a dramatic person. Okay, I'm very dramatic. I know that I'm very sensitive. I have known that I am a highly sensitive person, like an HSP or whatever you wanna call it, since I was like a toddler. Like, I understand that. I feel things very deeply. It's fine. But I just didn't really fully prepare for what like could possibly happen with a mirroring God of me yesterday. So I had it done. It was fine by the way. The actual procedure, totally fine. Didn't even feel it. He told me that, you know, the numbing drops that he was gonna put in my ear were gonna like burn. And I didn't even like feel them. I mean, I felt the liquid go into my ear and that didn't feel great. But the only part that like was slightly uncomfortable was him sticking that thing in there so that he could like see, you know, the little black thing where they do that. Like that was the worst part. I have a small like ear canal I guess. And so that was kind of the part that was the most uncomfortable. But I was like, are you gonna tell me when you do it? And he goes, I already did it. I was like, oh. So the procedure, absolutely fine. But immediately after, I think I was just expecting like some relief. I was expecting like, oh, okay, cool. Like I'm gonna get this whole poke to my eardrum and then I'm gonna feel better. And I actually feel worse. Not only does this ear feel so much more plugged up and I have such muffled hearing on this sound, but now this ear feels plugged up and weird. And if you've had a mirroring God of me or if you've had like tubes put in your ears or whatever, you will have to let me know what your experience was like. But based on everything that I've searched and like all the reddits that I've gone through, it appears that it's just gonna take a few weeks and that's normal. And then it's gonna hopefully be better than it was beforehand. But this ear is now freaking me out because this ear is just like muffled and I can hear myself in my ear and in my head. Like if that makes sense, it's like when you get water in your ear or something. And then this ear weirdly, it's like I'm picking up on like bass more. Like if someone drives by, their car sounds like so freaking loud to me or when I take steps, like I can hear the like boom, boom, boom of my steps. It's just very weird. So I think my ears are just adjusting. I mean, I do have a flight in three days now. So I'm glad that I at least got this done to hopefully prevent any sort of like, you know, bad incident with my eardrum on a flight because now there's a hole where pressure can get in and out. And like I can yawn fine. And like I got home yesterday. I was not expecting my hearing to be so distorted and so muffled. And I thought that like something was severely wrong. So I like came home and I just sobbed my eyes out. I was bawling on the couch for about two hours. I'm gonna be fine. Every time I like share how I'm feeling in vlogs and then like, you know, a few days later, I sit down to edit it. I'm like, I don't, I can't relate to that at all. Like I don't feel that way. So I'm gonna be completely fine. I am so excited for our trip, which for me is in like three days, but for you, it'll be like a couple of vlogs from now. And it's just like, I feel so grateful. Like I love my life. I feel so relieved that we got our Disneyland passes. Like everything is good there, but if I had known how much my hearing would be distorted and like how it literally sounds like I'm underwater. And it just made me really emotional. Like I just, yeah. If I had known that, I might not have gotten this done. I'm not entirely sure, but I also feel like some sense of relief because I feel like there's just extra protection in case something were to go wrong on a flight. Anyway, it's all good, but I just wanted to be honest with you and let you know that like, yeah, yesterday was not a good day. Just know that yesterday I was on that couch right there, sobbing my eyes out. I was like, everything sounds so weird. And like every time a car would go by, it was awful. I have decided this morning after, you know, chronically searching every single article, Reddit thread, everything you could possibly imagine. I was like, I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna spiral. I'm not gonna sit here and like obsessively search for everything. I'm gonna trust the process. It says it can take up to like a few weeks for your hearing to return to normal, but usually it happens within a few days. So I'm just like fingers crossed for that and it just is what it is, you know, I'll be fine. If it sounds like I'm underwater for the rest of my life, I mean, that would suck, but I would get through it. You know what I mean? I got my spice girl sweatshirt on. I am living my best life. I have so much editing to do today. I actually have to edit two main channel videos which is like next to impossible to do in one day, but I kind of got a head start on one yesterday, but like really didn't get much work done yesterday at all. So anyway, just checking in. Me and my plugged up ears are just gonna go park it on the couch and relax and take it easy. I just also think that I'm feeling a lot of the effects of just the last few months catching up with me and that's completely fine, you know, a lot's happened. So I think I'm just burning out a little bit. And like yesterday it just felt like my spirit was like a little bit broken. You know, I was just like, nothing is going right. I'm so tired. That's what I kept saying, I'm so tired. I just wanted to let you know I'm good. Things did not exactly go to plan, but I'll be all right. I'll be fine. Hello everyone. It is actually the next day yet again. Yesterday I did get a lot of editing done, which is great. I just finished filming, so that is why things are looking a little crazy in here, but that's okay, it's fine. I am feeling so much better today. I feel like my hearing is like a little bit better. Like I do feel like it's improved a little bit, although it is still bad. And I'm just in such a better headspace mentally. I actually spoke to my doctor on the phone today. I was talking to my mom and she was like, you should just call and bring up the concerns that you have and just see if there's anything they can do for you. Because my ear did kind of start itching, but I think that's just part of the healing process. But they did prescribe me some like, in case I need them antibiotic ear drops for when I'm gone, because like I'm gonna be out of the country. So that just makes me feel so much better to know that like okay, even if I develop an ear infection or something that I'm like so afraid of happening, it'll be fine. Like I have a backup plan type of thing. Also knowing that all of the symptoms and things that I am going through, like you know, muffled hearing and more pressure in my ear, et cetera, is all like completely normal. So that just makes me feel so much better. So I did kind of want to end this vlog like today instead of yesterday, because you could probably see it on my face yesterday. I was really trying hard to like put on a brave face, but I genuinely was like not doing well mentally. And I feel like it's okay to be like that. I don't know, I was like editing this vlog for what I had so far. And I was like, oh, this vlog seems so negative. Like I'm jumping all over the place, being like, oh, this happened to me and it's just like dramatic. And I felt like weird about it. But then I was like, it's literally just my life. That's what was happening. Sometimes I feel afraid that if I post videos that aren't, you know, perfectly happy and positive and sunshiny and whatever, then like people are gonna be like, well, I didn't sign up for this, you know? But then I remember that people are human and like we contain multitudes. And a lot of you who are watching these videos are also going through it. And you know, have moments where you're like, yeah, that was like a really shitty couple of months, but I bounced back and whatever. And I just wanna say all of the things that I talked about in this vlog are first world problems. Okay, there is a lot happening in the world right now. I have just been like everyone else grieving with the rest of the world. It's just been horrendous. And you know, it just keeps getting worse by the day. It's horrible. So I am like, I'm just trying to like put my life out there and things that I am going through. I recognize that, you know, I'm going out of the country in two days. I am so privileged and so fortunate and so freaking lucky thanks to you guys. So I just couldn't be more appreciative of that. But yeah, I just wanted to make sure that I ended this vlog to let you know that I'm good, besties, no worries. You know, we just go through it sometimes. And I feel like in the last probably, well, the last probably like two months especially, but really just like last few vlogs, it's just been a little off, but I feel like I'm on the upswing. And that's kind of why I wanted to touch on it because, you know, I even said in like the last clip where I was like, I am going to sit down to edit this and like not even relate to what I'm talking about. And I feel like I'm there. Like things were just so bleak over the last couple of days for me, mental health wise, when it came to like my ear and I was just like, this is, it's going to sound this way forever. But like, I fully accept now that like things are, it's going to get better. It's going to be fun. Anyway, sorry for over explaining. Just wanted to mention that, but thank you so much for being here and for hanging out with me. Drew and I are going to take the night off, no vlogging, nothing like that. And we're going to make like a nice little fall dessert. We might cook up the rest of the apples that we have from the apple orchard and make like a little apple crumble or something like that. Maybe I'll show that in the next vlog. So you're going to have one more vlog after this. I'm going to like pack and get my life together. Likely have an ADHD meltdown because that's just who I am. And then the next block will be a travel vlog to England of so, so excited. So thank you so much for being here and for hanging out with me during this vlog and I will see you very soon for the next one. Bye. Sorry for being dramatic. Love you guys.