 For a lot of people, falling in love and finding your soulmate is the ultimate goal in life. And while it would certainly be wonderful to meet the perfect person for you, it definitely doesn't mean that love is all there is to life. But when you make a conscious choice to remain single, oh boy, the battles you have to face then are of a totally different kind. That's because the not-so-single half of the population takes it upon itself to convince you otherwise. What matters is not what everyone else is doing or what other people think you should be doing, but what you want and what's right for you. So with that said, here are eight things only single people can relate to. 1. Feeling replaced by your friend's significant other Ever since your friends all started dating someone, do you feel like you hardly see them anymore? You're happy for them, of course, and you try to be as understanding as you can. But there are only so many times they can turn down your invitations or cancel on you at the last minute before you start to feel like you've been abandoned. Everything you used to do with them, they want to do with their significant other now. Like go to the movies or eat at new restaurants. And you can't help but feel the slightest bit of jealousy that this person is now who they want to spend all of their time with. 2. Having to be the third wheel all the time Are you always the third wheel when you hang out with your friends and their partners? Does your friend's significant other tag along on most of your get-togethers now because they want to get to know you better and befriend you too? Which is really nice of them, you have to admit. But it also makes you miss the days when it used to be just you and your friends, and no one felt left out. 3. Having to stomach a lot of PDA Whether it's from your friends or couples you see passing by, public displays of affection are honestly uncomfortable for other people to watch. And no, it's not because you're bitter about being single or anything, but after a certain point it starts to get exhausting. Listening to your friends telling you about all the different reasons why their partner is so dreamy. Having to awkwardly stand around while they kiss and call each other cute pet names. Seeing them act so happy and lovey-dovey all the time. Yeah, no thanks. It might be fun for them, but it's certainly not fun for you to watch and have to stomach it. 4. Always being asked why you're still single Do others badger you relentlessly about why you haven't found someone yet? Do they pressure you into dating again? No matter how many times you tell them, you don't want to. From your friends to your relatives, to people you barely even know. When you're single for a while, sometimes it feels like that's all anyone wants to talk to you about. You insist that you're single by choice, but most people can't seem to understand why anyone would want to stay single. Oh well. 5. Being comforted because of your relationship status Sad to say, most people just can't seem to wrap their heads around the idea that some of us are actually happy to stay single. A lot of people give us comforting pads on the back whenever the topic comes up and try to encourage us with platitudes like, don't worry it'll happen for you too or you'll find someone eventually just hang in there. As if being single is somehow synonymous with being miserable. 6. Being bombarded with personal questions What happened between you and your ex? Why are you having such a hard time finding someone? Don't you ever get lonely? Is there anyone you like? Once people learn you're still single, they'll start to bombard you with really inappropriate personal questions. They're convinced their questions will help you find your next date. Have you ever thought about dating so and so and of course, isn't it time you moved on already? Single people have to put up with hearing such insensitive questions when frankly, it's not anyone's business but yours why you choose to stay single. 7. Constantly being set up on blind dates Do people keep coming up to you to say, I know the perfect match for you, or you should really meet so and so, you'd make a great couple. If only you had a dollar for every time you heard those things. And while your friends and family members do have good intentions, you can't help but feel fed up over their constant attempts at playing matchmaker and setting you up with someone. 8. Feeling pressured to find someone already Has anyone ever teased you about being single or told you that you should just lower your standards? They make it seem like there's something wrong with being single. But the truth is, you're happy to stay single for now because you know that the journey is every bit as important as the destination. After all, there's a lot of freedom, independence, fun and excitement that comes from being romantically unattached to someone. In the end, being single allows you to focus on yourself and it can be a time of great self growth and self discovery. It's better to stay single and wait for the right person to come along than settle for anything less. Being in a relationship has rewarding experiences. When you're with a healthy partner, you learn to grow with someone, step out of your comfort zone, and your social life expands as you build connections with their family members and friends. But being single has its benefits too. We're tired of social media mainly highlighting relationship goals. Why not start a hashtag single goals movement too? Here are 8 reasons to be single. 1. You can save money Who else here is a broke millennial? Although there are ways to be creative and spend less on dates, a certain budget still has to be established when entering relationships. Transportation and gift giving, for instance, are harder aspects to avoid. But when you're single, your bank account won't thank you for it. Unless you're an impulsive spender in general. To gain insights on how to spend more wisely, check out the Financial Diets channel. They offer practical advice that's easy to use. Anyone can use it, whether you're still a student figuring out finances or someone who wants to travel more. 2. You can fortify your friendships and family relationships When people enter relationships, it's common for them to pull the Disappearing Act. They might not see their family and friends until they enter the comfortable stage of their relationship, which can take up to 6 months to a year for them to realize they actually miss having a social life outside of their partner. When you're single, however, you can make plans with your close loved ones without having to consider your partner's schedule too. Yay, freedom. 3. You can explore new hobbies This isn't to say you can't do the same when you enter a relationship with someone. In fact, they might actually encourage you to try new things you never would have considered in the first place. But there's something special about embarking on this journey alone. Whether that means taking up knitting, snowboarding, or cooking classes, you become one with your passion with less interruptions and distractions. 4. You can go after your dream job more easily The thing about being in relationships is that they require compromise on both partners to grow on the same page in order to sustain. But when you're single, you don't have to limit yourself to one location, which may affect your ideal job opportunities. You can just pack up your bags and leave whenever you can. If your heart is tugging you to move into the big city to become a fashion designer, no problem. Or if you want solitude and quiet, residing in the middle of nowhere is also an option without having to worry about neglecting your partner. 5. You can be selfish without consequences My boyfriend and I take turns watching our shows on TV, and I'm not gonna lie. I often miss those days where I could just binge watch my drama series without having to worry about hogging the screen. But when you're single, you can be selfish without hurting someone else. If you want to go to that restaurant this weekend, you can. The less people you have to run a decision by, the better. Because when you experience these moments alone, the only person it affects is you. 6. You deal with less drama Let me tell you, fighting with your partner is not fun. But when you're with the right person, the fights are well in which they strengthen your relationship instead of weakening it. Single life, however, works in your favor. Because the only drama you have to deal with is from family, friends, and work. You have one less life department to worry about. Therefore, you also have fewer emotions to sort through. 7. You master self-sufficiency If you're someone who needs validation frequently, being single can work to your advantage. I know you might be itching for a fulfilling relationship, but establishing a strong, healthy relationship with yourself is actually the most vital to your growth. Once you've established a strong sense of self, you're more likely to avoid codependent relationships in the future. How is that not fantastic? 8. You still experience the excitement of finding your soulmate. The possibilities will seem endless. You might meet the one on your summer trip, or maybe they'll happen to sit next to you in next semester's class. Work on yourself. Surround yourself with the things you love, and the right person will come along. You never know what's going to happen. So be patient, enjoy the present, and be thankful that you're alive in this very moment. If we may ask a personal question, how's your love life? Are you currently single, or perhaps you're looking for a long-term relationship? Although we hope you've found that special someone, we understand that generally, dating isn't easy. Do you think you might be hurting your chances at true love? Have you had a long list of failed relationships, but can't seem to figure out where it all went wrong? Well, here are 10 things that might be keeping you from finding relationships that work. 1. You have cynical views about love. What's that saying again? Once bitten, twice shy? It's common for people who have been stung by love before to stop believing in the magic of romance. You have every right to grieve, feel hurt, and learn from the experience. But being stuck in your negative ways and dwelling on your pain, resentment, and regret is only going to close you off from new opportunities to find the one who truly loves you for who you are. 2. You set unrealistic standards. Nowadays, we see so many pictures and posts online about couples who are hashtag relationship goals that it may start to cloud your judgment and give you unrealistically high standards. You might turn down great dating prospects, or throw away a special connection you had with someone just because it wasn't everything you hoped it would be. But the truth is, sometimes relationships are more about being the right person than finding the right person. 3. You've set too many dealbreakers. You have standards, you know what you want, and that's a good thing. But expecting too much of your potential partners too fast sets the scene for failure and disappointment. Are you so quick to call it quits and run away at the first sign of imperfection? Just as you deserve a fair chance, so do they. In the end, relationships take time and effort, and sometimes, those flaws make this person uniquely tailored for your relationship. It's in the complete acceptance of an imperfect person that we find the kind of love that's meant to last. 4. You have unresolved past trauma. Whether it's a messy breakup, a toxic relationship, or an unhappy childhood, your past can leave you with loads of painful memories and emotional scars that you often never really get over. You end up carrying that trauma with you throughout your life, unknowingly allowing it to ruin your relationships. Resolution, acceptance, and being at peace with your past will not only negate most of the detrimental effects, but also help you be a better partner, giving the relationship its best chance to stand the test of time. 5. You have low self-esteem. I know you've heard the quote, you can't love someone else until you learn to love yourself first. When you suffer from low self-esteem, you tend to lose yourself and your partner. Instead of developing your own sense of self, your partner is used as a substitute. Since you feel like you're unworthy of their love, you constantly worry that they'll eventually realize that and leave. The insecurity makes this a self-fulfilling prophecy, through things like misinterpreting small actions, catastrophizing and constantly suspecting your partner of things. This can be exhausting for the other person, and for you. 6. You have a fear of happiness. Hey, don't laugh, we know how it sounds. Why would anyone fear being happy? We humans are strange creatures, and this indeed is something that happens, even though most of us aren't aware of it. Are you afraid of what would happen if you ever did find the one? So afraid that it leads you to sabotaging your own relationships? Do you push people away before they can get too close to you, because having an honest, emotional connection with someone scares you? You try not to get too attached and suppress your desire for connection, so much so that others may misunderstand and think you're inconsiderate and consistent and not at all interested. 7. You have trust issues. Do you feel jealous about your partner being close with other people? Does it make you uncomfortable to think of them going out without you? Do you need to read their messages and know where they are all the time just to feel secure? Sad to say, nothing dooms a relationship faster than a lack of mutual trust. Behaving like you don't trust them will cause your partner to grow resentful of you over time. No one likes being constantly controlled and under suspicion. 8. You think you'll lose your independence by being in a relationship. The rom-com movies always say, you complete me, which isn't the healthiest of messages. Perhaps you subconsciously fear commitment because you think you'll lose your independence or freedom when you do find a relationship. The truth is the opposite. Remember this, in a healthy relationship you should never have to sacrifice your personality, your independence, or who you are for a romantic partner. The hallmark of every strong, enduring relationship is learning to maintain your independence while still being happily committed to someone. 9. You want someone you can't or shouldn't have. Most of us are guilty of liking somebody against our better judgments. Probably even more than once. Whether it's because they're already taken or emotionally unavailable, it's easy to fall in love with the wrong people. Obsessing over the forbidden fruit closes off your ability to consider the more compatible and better suited people for you. 10. You don't learn from your mistakes. We all make mistakes. We're only human. But what mistakes have you made in your past relationships? And what have you learned from them? What's changed about you and how you look at things because of your mistakes? If you don't know or believe you've never done anything wrong, this may be the most detrimental factor to your ability to find a lasting relationship. The mistakes allow us to learn, grow, and be better the next time around. If there's no learning, the same mistakes occur and the cycle is endless. A relationship takes more than one person. Luckily enough, one of those people is you. How do you think you're doing? What went sideways in previous relationships? Do you relate to any of these signs in this video? Or perhaps you see your friend who has these signs? Knowing the answers to these goes a long way to helping you on your quest for love. Hollywood and marketing companies have a lot of people chasing after love like it's a prize or a status symbol. But what's the big deal with relationships? Do you need a New Year's Kiss or a Valentine? Are relationships overrated? Maybe not for everyone, but there definitely are some benefits to being single. Relationships can be wonderful, but being single can too. You don't have to be bitter and lonely. Let's take a look at a few of the benefits of being single. Strengthening bonds. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, something we all want is love and belonging. We want to be loved unconditionally. We want someone who we can talk to about anything. A lot of the time, especially as we get older, that gap seems to become more obvious, and we tend to think that the thing that's missing is romantic love. Because of that, we lose sight of the fact that we can receive love and affection from many sources, not just a romantic partner. A study conducted in 2016 revealed that receiving support from other sources like your friends and family can mitigate feelings of romantic loneliness. In other words, spending time with friends and family can keep that nagging feeling that something is missing away. Permission to be selfish. A 2013 article published in Politics, Philosophy, and Economics titled Can a Compromise Be Fair states that compromises need to occur in relationships, even at the cost of fairness. This means compromises aren't always fair, but they are necessary for a relationship to work. That's good news for single people. Of course, compromises will still come up as you balance work or school, friends and family, but the most stressful and time-consuming compromises come with being in a relationship. You don't need to discuss plans of a significant other. You can just decide on things yourself. You don't need to compromise. Feel like treating yourself to sushi in a movie on a lovely Sunday afternoon? You can. That includes not worrying about the option, needs, or wants that a significant other would have. No worrying that they're not in the mood for sushi or that they don't want to see the movie you picked. It's the one time, aside from your birthday, that you can be a little more selfish than usual. Look within. When you're single and don't have to compromise, you have more time to discover the things that make you you. Whether you like to spend entire days playing video games or watching niche films that make other people squeamish, you can do whatever tickles your fancy when you aren't in a relationship. This also extends to introspection. You have time to look inwards and learn about yourself. You can figure out everything that you need and want in life. You'll also have time to recognize and heal past trauma. When you're in a relationship, your goals need to fit into the relationship or a compromise needs to be met. You shouldn't have to compromise on your dreams and the things that you're most passionate about. In a thesis written in 2019 titled Seeking Solitude, The Positive Effect of Being Alone, PhD candidate Samantha Voss wrote, Being in uninterrupted silence gets you involved in your own emotions and thoughts. You get to really understand them, create an inward awareness that helps you improve your outward awareness. And that sums it up perfectly. Mental health. Existentialist philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre has a famous quote that says, If you're lonely when you're alone, you're in bad company. Being in a relationship shouldn't negatively affect your mental health, but it can. This also goes for being single, but when you're single, you can choose that alone time for your mental health whenever you need it. A few studies have been done on the effects of a relationship on your mental health. Clinical psychologist Scott Brathwhite found that improving your relationship can improve your mental health, but improving your mental health won't necessarily improve your relationships. This suggests that if you have mental health issues now, getting into a relationship isn't a way to solve these issues. According to psychologist Adele Forth, there is a possibility that your relationship can lead to trauma if your partner is or becomes abusive. That shouldn't be something you have to worry about. While you're single, take time to appreciate your own company and make sure your mental space is healthy. Use this time to care for yourself. Do a face mask, work out, or watch some trash TV. Treat yourself well. You can always experience romance on your own through a solo date, unlike Lady Gaga. You don't want a bad romance. Relationships can be wonderful, but if you're waiting for the one not interested in relationships or you've just left a relationship, just know there's a lot to enjoy in the single life. Let us know how the single life is treating you in the comments. Leave a like and subscribe to Psych2Go for more videos like this, and if we can leave you with one thing, it's this. Being single doesn't mean you have to be lonely.