 The Anderson family. But Mary, I don't think we should interfere with other people's marriages. If the Adamses can't make it, that's their hard luck. But she's so darling, Oliver. Surely, there must be something we could do for them. Yeah, and end up in a lot of trouble. No, Mary. Not this boy. But it wouldn't put us out one bit, darling. No. I know what interference does to people, so forget it. Well, here they go again, folks. Now, let's visit the Anderson family. Well, this whole thing started when Mary heard that Mrs. Adams was having trouble with her husband. And since Mrs. Adams is a lovely president of the lady's auxiliary, Mary felt that she would be killing two birds with one stone by helping them patch up their differences. But Oliver has different ideas. Look, Mary, Joe Adams took her for better or for worse. And I don't know how she could be worse off. But they've been so happy, Oliver. We can't just sit around and see those two lovely people break up that way. Maybe he wants it that way. You know, Mary, it may look like they're very happy to the onlooker, but maybe she's tough to get along with. Nevertheless, you have a talk with Joe and I'll talk to June. No, I'll talk to June. You kid around with Joe. Well, now, just a minute, Mr. Anderson. Let's have no more of your frivolity. Oh, just clowning, honey. Yes, I know you were. June wouldn't see the humor in it. Oh, well, if I happen to jump into Joe, I'll... I'll happen together in no time. That's what I like to hear, dear. I'll try to see June. She's such a lovely person. Oliver, look at the time. You'd better get going. Yeah, gee, I almost forgot. I'm so absorbed in our little dirt-dishing. You know, I really believe you were. Oh, Anderson, I believe I can trust you to do a little special work for me without it running into time and a half. Special work? Yes. Joe Adams was just in here. Oh, yeah, Joe. He's eating alone now, isn't he? Let's not be so uncouth. Oh, well, I... He's staying at the hotel during a little misunderstanding with Mrs. Adams. I see. We were just discussing the same thing this morning. Hmm. I didn't know this affair. Had reached the discussion stage. Oh, I... You probably don't know this, but June, Mrs. Adams, is the favorite niece of Mrs. Thompson, my wife. Oh, no, no, I didn't know that. And June always seems nice, too. Yes. How do you mean that? Why, I didn't mean anything. Well, what did you want me to do? Do? Oh, oh, yes. Joe Adams just purchased a hairdryer from us to send to his wife a sort of a peace offering. Gee, with a washing machine, you'd have been in the bag. Let's not be so crude with such a wonderful thing as marriage. Well, I... At least where anyone can hear us. But now, I want you to deliver this to June and don't say a word about who sent it until Joe calls and see if she's happy with it. I'll just leave it and go on. That's right. This must be handled very delicately. Oh, of course. You can depend on me. I'm rather subtle. Yeah, subtle is a blackjack, but don't trip up on this thing now, Anderson. Even my home life depends somewhat on this working out. Oh, gee, I didn't know what you were... You weren't supposed to know. Just deliver this dryer without involving us in three lawsuits and a divorce. Oh, oh, no, no, not yet. Have to stop in here a minute. Hey, now, wait just a minute. In the Adams house? Yeah. Marthe heard they were having trouble. Oh, well, if Marthe heard it, then they're in for more trouble. Oh, nope, nope, that ain't true. Marthe's a good woman. Yeah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I've been out of the house since you heard about it. Well, I'll see you later this evening, Homer. I have to go on in now. Hey, what you get under your arm there? Arm? Uh, something for Mary? No, something for... You won't say anything to anyone, will you? Oh, nearly a word to nobody. What is it, huh? Something for June Adams. Oliver, that ain't right. There's that little woman who's sitting home waiting for you. Ah, cut it out. How'd you meet her? Shh, forget you even saw me. Well, sir, that reminds me of a little waitress one time in Topeka. I was taking a present. Oh, nice little girl she was. And I was taking her a present up to the house. And it was a nice present. Just like you're doing. I'm taking no present up to anybody. Hey, don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you. Well, sir, I get up to the house and she told me her husband was in China. So I go up and I walk my knuckles on the door and what do you suppose happened? Well, what happened? He come to the door himself and there I was with my present. What happened then? Uh, what happened then? Yeah. Uh, that's the last thing I remember. But this ain't right, Oliver. I don't like it. Mary's a good woman. Junior's a good youngin' and by gum it ain't sportin'. Oh, well. You'd be surprised how happy this little present is gonna make somebody. Yes. Oh, oh, it's Mr. Anderson. Uh, yeah. Um, could I step in a moment? I guess so. Come in. Uh, that other gentleman out there with you. Oh, gentleman? Oh, that wasn't any gentleman. That was Homer Meister. Oh, uh, what did you want, Mr. Anderson? Uh, what? Oh, oh, oh, oh, yes, excuse me. I just wanted to drop this off on my way home, something from our store, a hair dryer. A hair dryer? Oh, how lovely for me. Yeah, just a little thing, but the thought is there. Oh, my goodness. I don't know if I should accept it. Oh, but let's see it. It's our small bottle, the 3-Z with the automatic cutout. Oh, oh, Mr. Anderson, I think it's wonderful. But I just couldn't think of accepting this, really. How does it work? Oh, you just plug it in the wall. Oh, there's the door buzzer. Excuse me a moment. Yes? Oh, you back. Uh, uh, hey, I just wanted to speak to Mr. Anderson. Mr. Anderson, it's Mr. Meister. Oh, what is it, Homer? You, uh, you left your motor car running. Thought maybe you didn't know it. Well, just shut it off. Just shut it off, huh? Yeah, yeah, I'll see you tonight. He just wanted to know what you were doing in here. Homer? Oh, no, you're wrong. Homer's my friend. Uh, you were going to show me how to start the dryer. Oh, yes, yes, of course. See, you just plug it here in the socket. Uh-huh. Turn on this little clicker here, see? Oh, wonderful. Oh, but I really couldn't accept it, Mr. Anderson. Oh, now go ahead. We have a lot of them in stock. This is our cheapest model, anyhow. Cheapest? Hmm, sounds like something my husband bought. Always buys the cheapest of everything. Oh, he's a good guy, though. Oh, he's all right in some ways, I guess. No, no, no, let's see. Now, these are the instructions here on this sheet here. But I just couldn't think of accepting it, Mr. Anderson. At least not before our divorce is final, anyhow. Oh, well, the divorce has nothing to do with it. Oh, now look, Mr. Anderson. I'm a lady. Oh, of course you are. And I don't feel that this is the thing for you to be doing. Well, it's part of my job. Part of your job? I don't understand. Uh, well, I don't dare say anymore, really. You know, Mr. Anderson, I've known your family for a long time, and I admire Mary very much. Yes, she likes you, too. But I could never face her after this. Oh, come now. She's not that bad. And I'd appreciate it very much if you'd just gather up that blowtorch or whatever it is and leave this house. I don't want to talk to you or Mary or anyone else. Yeah, but you don't understand, Mrs. Adams. I think I do. Please leave this minute. Now, you're all wrong, Mrs. Adams. There's something I should tell you, but I don't dare. You're right you don't dare. Now get out of here with that, that contraption. It's our Z-daster. And I mean now, Anderson. I see you've still got the package. How come you didn't leave it, Harper? Huh? Oh, oh, oh, it's over. What are you doing out here in my car? Oh, I just wanted to talk to you before you busted up your home. Ah, don't be ridiculous. How come you didn't leave the little present, huh? But you didn't want it. Would you be quiet or you'll walk home? Uh, I ain't saying another word because I know just how you'd come out in there. Oh, you knew how I'd come out. Yep, yep. You see, I just dropped in ahead of you to see if there wasn't something I could do to help the little woman. Oh, so that's it, huh? Yep, but I was kind of misunderstood, too. I wasn't misunderstood. Oh, gosh, I don't know what to think, Oliver. I've seen it with my own eyes. Well, now just stop worrying. I know what I'm doing. She, she, she'll be sure mad when she run you out. Look, hold on. I don't want to hear any more about it at all. Hey, remember that old saying, one bad peach will spoil the whole barrel. Well, she's not a spoiled peach. And anyhow, it isn't peach, it's apple. What's this thing in this package? Oh, uh, it's just one of the hairdryers from the store. Oh, for me? Uh, no, it's one I have to take back. Oh. Where's Junior? Oh, he's at a boys meeting at the Gargoyle Club. Oh. You act so strange, Oliver. Strange? Something wrong at the shop? No, nothing's wrong. Just had a bad day, is all. Oh, that's a shame. I'm sorry, dear. Mm-hmm. Oh, well, there's corned beef and cabbage for dinner. Sound good? Best thing I've heard since 330. Then let's just forget work and everything else and you lie down and rest. I won't be but a minute. Ah, swell. You know, Mary, it's like you say. When two people can't get along, it's tough. Yes, I know, dear. Thinking of June and Joe? Yeah. Gee, he must lead a dog's life. That makes you say that. Oh, just from the way she acts. Oh, well, maybe we can think of some way to bring them together. She's so nice. I don't think we should interfere, really. Nonsense. Joe's staying at a hotel. How did you know? The boss told me. I bet it's lonely there for him. Yeah, but it's quiet. Now, Oliver, that's not the right attitude. Why don't you talk to Joe? Not me. Well, then I think I'll talk to June. I don't think she wants to speak to you. Oh, that's silly. June likes us. She still doesn't want us to join her family circle. Oh, you just lean back and relax now. We'll eat in 20 minutes. June, you get back in time. Well, maybe I'll just step over to Homer's a minute. You know, you're acting very strangely, Oliver. I am? Yes, you are. What's going on? Well, I guess there's no sense in keeping quiet. Boss won't care if you know. The boss? Why shouldn't I know? Well, look, now, Joe bought this hairdryer for June, and I was supposed to give it to her and say nothing. And? She wouldn't take it. She told me to get out. Well, of all the nerve, when you were just trying to help. Yeah, well, of course, it was part of my job, too. She's the niece of the boss's wife. Yes, I know. Then Homer hung around to see what happened. Hung around where? Hung around the Adam's house. Oh, no. Well, what did you tell him? Well, I didn't want to tell him Joe said it, so I told him I was just dropping it off there. Did you go in the house? I, yes, just to show her how it worked. Did you have to show her how it worked? Well, yes, you know how women are about those things. Mm-hmm, yes, I do. Oh, come on. Seems funny. She could read the directions. She was positively insulting. Oh, she was, huh? Well, I'll speak to her about it. I don't care if she is president of the auxiliary. No, don't talk to her. Why? Oh, nothing. It would be better if you didn't. She's angry with me. I mean, uh... Well, now I am interested. Listen, I was only... Oh, I'm not going to accuse you of things, because I don't know. I'll certainly tell June she's out of place insulting my husband. No, no, let it go, Mary. She has enough trouble already. Enough trouble? Yeah, she still has Joe. I'll get it. Yes, Mary Anderson speaking. Hello, Mary. This is Homer. Well, hello, Homer. Uh, what's wrong? Wrong? Uh, well, nothing, Mary. Nothing at all. Uh, let me speak to Oliver. Oliver's lying down, Homer. I am not. Let me have it, Mary. Oh, here he is, Homer. Thanks. Oh, hello, Homer. What is it? Uh, house. Joe Adams? What is it, Oliver? So Joe just walked by your house. So what? And he's mad? Back door? Well, no, no. Wait a minute. Uh, please warn you like this. Oh, well, uh... I'll take care of myself, Homer. Yeah, I hope so. No, no, no. I won't mention it, Homer. So long. So long. What's wrong with Homer? Uh, that's a fine thing. Joe Adams is headed this way with blood in his eye. He is? I wonder why. Or do I? The Anderson family. They say it's always darkest just before the dawn. But I'm afraid something besides the dawn is about to break. For walking up to the Anderson's front door is none other than Joe Adams. And he's not smiling. Must be someone at the door, huh? Sounds like it. What are you waiting for? Just tell him I don't care to talk to him. Why? Look, look, Mary, Joe's getting madder every minute. Just tell him I don't feel well. Come back tomorrow. We won't have any trouble in here. I can tell you that. Yes? Is Casanova Anderson at home? Why, yes. Come in. Junior isn't home, is he? Why, no. Why? I hate scenes around kids. Oh. Oh, there you are, Anderson. Well, wow, this is a surprise. How are you, Joe? Sit down. No, no, I'll stand. I just want to ask you two questions. Two? Well, maybe I can answer them. Stand back, Mrs. Anderson. He may not give me the right answer. Now, just a minute, Joe Adams. Yeah, just a minute, Joe Adams. Excuse me, Mrs. Anderson. I forgot myself. This isn't the place for a brawl, but brawl. Yes, anyhow, here's the questions. One, did you stop in to see my wife? Why? Yes, I did. I was just delivering her. Just answer yes or no. So it's yes. Yeah. OK, that clears up number one. Would you please leave, Mr. Adams? Wait, Mary, I want to hear question number two. OK, number two, who was that midget who went in just ahead of you? Oh, you mean? I don't know who you mean, Adams. Oh, you don't, eh? I went there on business. What business? It's my business. Look, Anderson, nobody's going to try to break up my home unless I do it myself. And if that shoe fits, put it on, brother. Well, now, look, Joe, I was just trying to help. Oh, yeah. Now, look, Joe, this is absolutely silly. There you see. It is. You know, Mrs. Anderson, there's no point in breaking up two homes. Otherwise, I'd go into details. Into details? Yes. Or else, perhaps Oliver would rather come out and back with me and have this thing out. In back? Well, it's kind of torn up back there. Couldn't we just walk down to the corner? It's lighter there. Corner, OK. I just want you satisfied. But you're not going to enjoy this interview anyhow. Oh, yeah? I mean, all right. Maybe we should talk it over. Come on. Oliver, for heaven's sakes, don't. This is for your own good, Mrs. Anderson. Believe me. Come on. Maybe there are a few things you don't know. Now, remember, Mrs. Anderson, he's going out on his own free will. She knows that. Come on. Oliver, you're not going out there. This is just part of your plan to bring these two lovely people together. I got to hand it to you, Anderson. You've got nerve. What is it, Mary? Homer, you have to help me. Shh. Martha, he's just taking a little nap. I'll just tip out in front with you. All right. Yeah. Hey, I hope nobody's mixed me up in this thing, Mary. Well, that's not the idea, Homer. Oliver's gone with Joe. He's gone with that fellow? And I'm worried. You get your coat on and go down to the corner. Who, me? Yes. Well, now, Mary seems like that's your place. You know, he wouldn't strike a woman. Well, that's not the idea. You know Oliver did nothing wrong. Maybe you could talk to Joe, too. He wouldn't cause trouble with two of you there. He's real mad, huh? He certainly is, Homer. Well, no, no. As much as I'd like to help Oliver, it don't seem right for me to be getting all bruised up. It ain't no doings of mine, you know. I see. A fine friend. Well, now, look here. Mary, you know my position here at home. Martha ain't the calm type like you be, Mary. And anyhow, Joe don't like me. I know Oliver will be glad to hear what a great friend you are, Homer. Well, now, I am a friend, Mary. So help me. But, you know, I can't break up my home, too. Anyhow, maybe Oliver will land a lucky punch. Don't talk like that. I know Oliver. Well, gosh, now, Mary, I feel right sorry for both of you. But like I said... Well, all right, Homer. Maybe it's only fair, but I should tell you that he knows about the man who visited Mrs. Adams before Oliver went in. He does? Well, now, I mean, he didn't mention no names, did he? I don't think he knew your name. But he asked who the midget was. Midget? Why, that poquette, that snake-in-sheep's clothing, the rate a man livin' could insult my height that way. Wait, I tell Martha you to get the hot warden, aren't you ready? And I'll show you, Mary. Though I say to myself, this Anderson guy's movin' in. Well, naturally, I was perturbed, say the least. I know, I feel. It's a good thing you didn't try to carry out your plan to annihilate me. Just look what it would happen. You mean you would have been unjustly thrashed. No, no, no, of course not. What I mean was, even if you've been able to walk, they'd have shoveled you up into an ambulance and your wife would have said good enough for the bum. So I'm a bum. Well, just to your wife. You see, I've saved you all that humiliation. Now you can go on back home and hold your chin up. Both of them, everything's all set now. I didn't tell her the hairdryer was from you. Is that good? Of course. Now look and see how swell she feels. To be able to brush off fellows or bring things to her. Gosh, I never looked at it that way, Anderson. Did she like the dryer? No, because it wasn't from you. You see what I'm telling you? You know, Anderson, you've been my friend. Well, let's say I tried to be. Now we'll just go back to our house and get the dryer. I think now would be a time for you to put in an appearance with the present. Yeah, and to think I was going to flatten you, I apologize. Ah, forget it. Don't you worry. I'm not worrying. Well, we'll stop at your place and get the dryer. Then I'll make the presentation. That's right. You can't miss. I'll walk over with you just to let you run over your getting back in speech a few times with some coaching. You know, Anderson, I'll never forget this. When she comes to the door, you take her in your arms and hug her. Tell her how much you love her and then dodge fast. I just dodge. That's right. Now, ring. You got the dryer? Yeah, yeah. Right under my arm. Darling, come to my arms. Oh, you. Get out before I call the police. Wait, Mrs. Adams. He's eating his heart out. Who asked you? Yeah, who asked you? Well, I just thought you... Joe, are you going to let this person interfere? No, wait. Count me out of this. I'm only helping out here. Who asked you to help out? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who asked you? Well, I thought you... Joe and I were always happy until outside parties started helping out. Yeah, I'm no outside person. And I'm sick and tired of having my family grievances have aired on every side walking and in every soda fountain. I haven't been in a soda fountain in two weeks. Has this meddler been doing that? No, just wait a minute here. Here, here, honey. Hold my glasses. Not on my phone. Take them out to the curb. Now, look, Joe. Remember, the jail is a pretty poor substitute for the good outside air. Oh, yes, of course. A salt and batter. Sure. So while you two love birds make up, I'll run on home. You have so much to talk about. And try staying there. Yeah, yeah. Try staying there. Well, now that you're back... Yes, dear. I want you to come in and explain something to me about this drier. Now, Mary, I wouldn't worry too much about Oliver. You know how he is. Yes, I know. That's why I'm worried. How come he got started on this, sir? Referee in business. Oh, it's all my fault, Homer. Oh, it is, huh? Yes. I'm the one who kept asking him to help them. Gosh, maybe this is Oliver coming home now. Oliver? What is it? Oh, are you all right, darling? All right, of course I am. But, Joe, what's the matter? That's all straight and out. I just left Joe and Mrs. Adams making goo-goo eyes at each other. Yeah, they don't sound right, Oliver. Not them too, anyhow. But, Oliver, you explained to Joe why you called on her. Of course. We came home, got the drier, took it with us, and he gave it to her. Well, I must have been over talking with Homer and Martha. I didn't think you could do it, Oliver, so help me, I didn't. Ah, it was nothing. Ah, I'm so glad it all came out so well, Oliver. I was worried. Yeah, both of us. But I just assumed try to make a bigger success of our lives. That takes time, too. Well, of course it does, darling. But you did so well. You know, it reminds me one time Martha got on her high horse and she says to me, she says one thing. Look, look, look. Can you bring that up at another time, Homer? I'm tired. Tired? Yeah. Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, sure. Well, I was just keeping Mary company till you come back. You know, I'm beginning to wonder, Homer. Oh, now stop teasing Homer. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. He ain't teasing me, Mary. Night, Homer. Good night. Oh, I'm so thrilled, Oliver. Just think, Joe and Mrs. Adams back together again. And happy. Just through your efforts, huh? Oh, no. Doesn't it make you feel grand when you know you took two lives and molded them back into something beautiful? Beautiful? Mm-hmm. You know Joe better than that, don't you? Well, at any rate, we did all we could. I'm glad it turned out so well for them. I'll get it, Mary. Probably some congratulations. Yes, Oliver Anderson speaking. I just wanted to call... Bungle it? Yes, bungle it. Oh, no, I didn't. They're together again. That's what I mean. We've been trying to get Joe out of our family for years, and that's why I suggested he send her that cheap dryer. Well, I didn't know. The boss told me to make her take it. He said no such thing. Oh, well, I guess if you want things done right, you'd better do them yourself. Goodbye. What a way to talk to the boss's wife, Oliver. Oh, this thing makes me tired. The boss says this. The boss's wife says that. You say this. Homer says I'm mouthful. Maybe we should just watch out for the Anderson's for a change. Hi, Oliver. How you talk? Well... I was only trying to help. Yes, I know, Mary. I'm sorry. But you really mean it. That's what hurts. Oh, come on now, honey. I'm just burned up, that's all. When you try to help someone, you offend others. It just doesn't work out. But in this case it did. Without you, Joe would be moping. Without you, Joe would be moping around somewhere, and his wife would be heartbroken. I'd still be in the middle. No. All right, darling. You must admit my plan was good. Oh, now what? Mrs. Adams probably wants to thank us. Yes, Oliver Anderson speaking. This is Joe Adams. And listen here, you... Now, now, wait a minute. Don't speak that way in front of your wife. My wife isn't here. I'm phoning from the drugstore. Drugstore? What's wrong? Well, maybe you can explain that. I'm coming over. Now, now, wait, Joe. You said to give her the drugs. What is it, Oliver? Look, you want the Adams' to be happy. Yes. You want them to get together again. Yes. In fact, you're going to make it our business. Well, now, Oliver... Okay. Well, Joe is on his way over here. Only this time you explain to him. I'm not going to talk him out of it this time. But you said they were together and happy. I just said they were together. And for being just an innocent bystander, I'm getting pushed around. But what are you going to do, Oliver? I'm going over to Homer Meister's garage and get a good night's sleep. And brother, I'll be bolded in. If you need me, send Junior over, because I won't be back tonight. The Anderson family is written by Howard Swart, directed by Herb Lytton, and features Dick Lane as Oliver, Louise Arthur as Mary, and Herbert Rawlinson as Homer. Others in the cast were Doug Young, Jacqueline DeWitt, Ginny Johnson, and Paul Theodore. Music by Gordon Kibbe, sound effects by Ray Erlenborn, and your announcer is Ken Peters. The Anderson family is a Hollywood broadcaster's production transcribed from Hollywood.