 Hello and welcome back. Now it's all well and good to know the details of the text, but don't forget that the aim of the game is passing your assessments and achieving your top potential in assessments. So what I'll do is I'll go over level nine model responses that I've crafted myself and I will walk you through in lots of detail what goes into these top mark essays so that you can see how to craft a really, really strong response. But what I'd like you to do after you do that after you watch this video is please try to also craft a response to the same question because that's now what's going to crystallize your learning rather than just simply watching the video passively and thinking, okay, great. And now understand how it's laid out. Actually then afterwards, write out your own version of that exact same question because in that way, you're really locking in the lesson, you're trying to perfect your essay writing technique and you're really understanding what goes into crafting really, really strong responses. So now let's look at a model answer that I've prepared. Let's look at a past exam question relating to Jane Eyre. Now, as you can see here, the question essentially has an extract and this extract is essentially taken from chapter two six. It's to do with Helen Burns. So what we'll do is we'll read over the extract first and then I will show you a top level nine model answer that you can write in response to questions relating to the character of Helen Burns. So let's begin with reading through the extract. You say you have false Helen, what are they? To me, you seem very good. Then learn from me, not to judge by appearances. I am, as Ms. Scuthard said, slattenly. I seldom put and never keep things in order. I'm careless, I forget rules. I read when I should learn my lessons. I have no method and sometimes I say like you, I cannot bear to be subjected to systematic arrangements. This is all very provoking to Ms. Scuthard, who is naturally neat, punctual and particular and cross and crawl, I added. But Helen Burns would not admit my addition. She kept silence. Is Ms. Temple as severe to you as Ms. Scuthard? At the utterance of Ms. Temple's name, a soft smile flittered across her grave face. Ms. Temple is full of goodness. It pains her to be severe to anyone, even the worst in the school. She sees my errors and tells me of them gently. And if I do anything worthy of praise, she gives me my mead liberally. One strong proof of my wretchedly defective nature is that even her expulsions, so mild, so rational, have not influenced to cure me of my faults. And even her praise, though I value it most highly, cannot stimulate me to continued care and foresight. That's curious, said I. It's so easy to be careful. For you, I have no doubt it is. I observed you in your class this morning, and so you were closely attentive. Your thoughts never seemed to wander while Ms. Miller explained the lesson and questioned you. Now, mine continually rove away when I should be listening to Ms. Scuthard and collecting all she says with a suduity. Often I lose the very sound of her voice. I fall into sort of dream. Sometimes I think I'm in Northumberland and that the noises I hear around me are the bubbling of a little brook which runs through deep down near our house. Then, when it comes to my turn to reply, I have to be awakened and having heard nothing of what was read for listening to the visionary brook. I have no answer ready. Yet, how well you replied this afternoon. It was me a chance, the subject on which we had been reading had interested me. This afternoon, instead of dreaming of deep down, I was wondering how a man who wished to do right could act so unjustly and unwisely as Charles I sometimes did. And I thought, what a pity was that with his integrity and conscientiousness. He could see no further than the prerogatives of the crown. If he had but been able to look at distance and see how what they called the spirit of the age was tending. Still, I like Charles, I respect him, I pity him. Poor murdered king. Yes, his enemies were the worst. They shed blood, they had no right to shed. How dead they kill him. Helen was talking to herself now. She had forgotten. I could not very well understand her that I was ignorant or nearly so of the subject she discussed. I recalled her to my level. And when Miss Temple teaches you, do your thoughts wander then? No, certainly not often, because Miss Temple is generally something to say which is newer than my own reflections. Her language is singularly agreeable to me and the information she communicates is often just what I wished to gain. Well then, with Miss Temple, you're good? Yes, in a passive way. I make no effort. Our followers inclination guides me. There's no merit in such goodness. A great deal. You are good to those who are good to you. It is all I ever desire to be. If people were always kind and obedient to those who are cruel and unjust, the wicked people would have it all their own way. You'll never feel afraid and so they would never alter, but would grow worse and worse. When we are struck out without reason, we should strike back again, very hard. I'm sure we should. So hard as to teach a person who struck us never to do it again. You will change your mind, I hope, when you grow older, as yet you are but a little untaught girl. But I feel this, Helen. I must dislike those who, whatever I do please them, persist in disliking me. I must resist those who punish me unjustly. It is as natural as that I should love those who show me affection or submit to punishment when I feel it is deserved. Heathens and savage tribes hold that doctrine, but Christians and civilized nation disown it. How? I don't understand. It is not violence that best overcomes hate, nor vengeance that most certainly heals injury. What then? Read the New Testament and observe what Christ says and how he acts and make his word your wall and his conduct your example. What does he say? Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do go to them that hate you and despitefully use you. Then I should love Mrs. Reed, which I cannot do. I should bless the son John, which is impossible. In her turn, Helen Burns asked me to explain and I proceeded forthwith to pour out in my own way the tale of my sufferings and resentment. Bitter and trochulent when excited, I spoke as I felt without reserve or softening. Okay. Now, the question for this extract asks, in what ways does Bronte make the reader admire Helen Burns at this moment in the novel? So of course, in this part of the novel, we can see the different philosophies that Helen Burns and Jane Eyre have. Of course, this is when she's at Lowood and Jane Eyre is really admiring how Helen Burns is able to, in many ways, when she's mistreated by her teachers punished for what Jane Eyre sees as something she's not really committed a mistake of. Helen Burns is actually very, very self-recriminatory. She sees all the mistakes in herself and she sees everything from other people's perspectives but her own, okay? And of course, she then justifies this with her Christian virtues and values. Now, in terms of the question, the first thing you always need to do, especially when it comes to planning, is first off highlight the keywords and the questions. Of course, in this instance, in what ways does Helen Burns Bronte? So of course, what ways? What techniques? What quotations are used? Does Bronte make the reader admire Helen Burns, right? So this extract is meant to make us feel really admiring of Helen Burns, her Christianity, her forbearance and so on, okay? Now let's look at how to structure a response to this question. So of course, as you can see here with regards to the question, it's always good to begin with an introduction. Now, this introduction states, Bronte presents Helen Burns as an admirable character in the novel through her righteous and humble nature. This is shown through her Christian morals as well as the forgiving nature towards teachers who are unkind and immoral towards her. We as readers witness Helen's modest nature, which is admirable. Her passive demeanour as well as her emphasis on forgiveness, forbearance and humility highlights the good characteristics expected of a Victorian woman at the time. Helen's passivity stands as a stark contrast to Jane Eyre who at this point in the novel is very fiery, angry and seems unforgiving. Helen is used to impart the Christian view that forgiveness and kindness is superior to seeking revenge. Now, your introduction does not have to be this long. Indeed, your introduction can even be four lines, but what you always want to do, especially if you're aiming for a level nine or a level eight in your answers. And of course, if you want to get your examiner from the outset, really seeing that you know what you're writing about, it's always good to begin with an introduction and of course, close your essay with a conclusion, okay? So of course, in this introduction, I don't go into really specifics. I don't give any quotations. I just open the discussion. So now let's look at my first point. And of course, remember that this extract, you're essentially just making points closely related and tied to this extract. Okay, so let's look at the first point. Bronte captures Helen Burns as an admirable character through her strong Christian beliefs would gradually influence Jane. At first, there's a stark contrast between Helen's personality and Jane because in this extract, we can see that Jane is astounded how passive and forgiving Helen is of Miss Catherd. Helen's idea of forgiveness is connoted through her religious beliefs and Christian teachings about Jesus, which are presented in the New Testament. She advises Jane to love your enemies. And this statement connotes the idea of sacrificial agape love, which Jesus teaches. This reflects Helen's principles and she's depicted almost like a messianic figure in Lowood and this makes us admire her all the more. Helen further claims that Jane should make his word your role and his conduct your example. This declarative sentence coupled with the repetition of his shows Helen's firm Christian beliefs. It reflects the idea that just like Jesus Christ, the girls like Jane should be self-sacrificial towards their enemies. This influences Jane to become a strong Christian woman due to Helen's teachings about Christianity. This advice foreshadows how Jane's life was spiritually guided by Helen, who taught her the importance of being humble and forgiving. This is important because Jane later influences Mr. Rochester to connect with God and atone for his sins as she said God would guide him if he asks for forgiveness. Contextually in the Victorian era, many Victorians had a strong belief in the importance of being morally upright and being like Jesus. Helen is used as a figure to reflect the idea that many held that if people were meek and forgiving, they would be rewarded for their kindness towards their enemies in the afterlife. The notion of the afterlife is further invoked when Jane later forgives her aunt, Mrs. Reed, whom she despised. Jane shifts from declaring love Mrs. Reader cannot to being present by her bedside as she dies and forgiving her actions. Thus, Helen Burns' character is used as a powerful example for forgiveness and Christian virtues, hence she seems admirable in our eyes. Now, just to explain, firstly, one of the reasons why this opening paragraph is so strong is because I make constant reference to the key words, admire Helen Burns, how we see Helen Burns, for example, here as an admirable character, in other words, we admire her. Now, just to explain the structure of your responses, always begin as you can see here, I've started the long point, which I'm gonna highlight in yellow, okay? Then, of course, when you're quoting, make sure you support your evidence and add, of course, evidence from the passage and try as much as you can to embed it, and I'm gonna highlight the evidence in blue. Now, as you can see here, I have briefly explained the point evidence explanation, then I've added a little bit more evidence here, okay? But you can put the evidence together, so you can start with the point, which is in yellow, then evidence, which is in blue, then your explanation. Then as you can see here, as part of my explanation, I've made a structure point. I've talked about the declarative sentence. This is a structure point because I'm talking about how the Jane, rather Charlotte Bronte, what ways she makes a reader admire Helen Burns. So in this instance, the technique and the tool that Bronte uses to make us as readers as Maya Helen Burns is, as I've mentioned here, the declarative sentence, hopefully you can see this in bold, and of course, also repetition. So declarative sentence, sentence types, but also things like repetition, punctuation, all of these are structure techniques, okay? And of course, again, as you can see here, I've supported my points with evidence highlighted in blue. Then I've also linked to elsewhere in the novel. You don't have to go into lots of detail linking elsewhere to the novel. However, I've mentioned this is really important. Helen Burns is not only admirable, but she also teaches Jane really important Christian virtues, which later go on to make her influence Mr. Rochester in a really positive way, showing Mr. Rochester that he should also connect with God. Then I've added a contextual point and then linked it back to the question. So as you can see here, there's lots of context I've added and how Helen Burns's really strong Christian ethics were also really admirable during the Victorian era. She really followed the real ideal Victorian woman and the notion that Victorian women should be following Christian ideals of being very passive, being almost women, who in spite of how terribly society treated them, in spite of even maybe being married to men who were really horrible towards them, they would just be passive, they would be forgiving, and perhaps ultimately this would make the people around them become better individuals. And of course, as you can see here, my final sentence in my link I've still made sure to use keywords from the question, how Helen Burns is a powerful example and she's admirable going back to the question, how we admire Helen Burns, okay? So just to explain the structure of this paragraph once more before we move on, I'll start at the point, which is in yellow. Then I've given evidence, point evidence, evidence in blue. Then I've explained, this is highlighted in pink and part of my explanation as you can see here, I've talked about how techniques and in this instance is structure. And then I've linked back to the question, so point evidence explanation link. And as you can see here, it's also adding a contextual point and all of this stuff really elevates your essay in the eyes of the examiner. Do make sure you try it as much as you can to mention context, it doesn't have to be for every single paragraph, but make sure you put some context points every now and then. Now let's move on to the next point. Furthermore, Bronte depicts Helen Burns as an admirable character through her parent acceptance of cruelty and punishment and courage and without complaint. Bronte connotes her passive, stoic nature towards pain and punishment as she adopts an alternative view to violence, claiming, love your enemies. She suggests that it is important to bear any suffering in this world in order to benefit in the afterlife from God's blessings, which make her seem virtuous to us as readers. This idea contrasts Jane's concept of pain and struggle as she believes pain should be stopped by standing up to injustice and unfair treatment. She takes the approach that we should associate with the Old Testament idea of an eye for an eye. As Jane claims, when we are struck out without reason, we should strike back again and very hard. Bronte's repetition of the violent verb struck connotes a sense of roughness and Jane's violent approach towards injustice. This indicates how different both Jane and Helen were when dealing with cruelty and injustice. Contextually, Jane went against Victorian's expectations of women, whilst Helen's biblical views fit in with what Victorians saw as the angel of the house. The ideal Victorian woman was expected to be passive, even in the face of her husband's brutality, as she is expected to be kind, passive, faithful, as well as forgiving in spite of how her husband or people in society treated her. Jane's violent approach goes directly against Victorian norms as she's presented as impulsive. Hence, Helen is shown as an admirable Victorian girl and her approach foreshadows Jane's journey as her maturity increases and she eventually accepts these values. Now again here, I've actually begun with a shorter point. So as you can see here, my point, and I've opened, of course, talking about how Helen Burns is really admirable. Again, going back to the key words, why we see her as we can admire her, okay? And then I've added my first bit of evidence here. As you can see in blue, love your enemies taken from the passage, and as you can see, even with my previous paragraph, I've tried as much as I can to embed my quotes. In other words, when you're embedding, you're putting in the quote and it flows really seamlessly with your sentence. Then I've explained briefly, as you can see here, my explanation, and then as part of my explanation, I've contrasted Helen's characteristic with the characteristics and the belief system of Jane, right? So as you can see here, you've got the point and then the first piece of evidence in blue, then the explanation where I've mentioned Helen's worldview, the way she believes in forgiveness is now in contrast to Jane. Now, I've added this contrast and I've linked it to, firstly, Old Testament. So of course, you want to be a little bit familiar, not too familiar, but a little bit familiar with biblical allusions. So of course, the idea of loving your enemies is taken from the New Testament. This is when Jesus came as a messiah and he basically told everybody, okay, the Old Testament told you an eye for an eye, okay? So this is actually taken from the Old Testament. So actually I would say this is a context point. So I'm gonna highlight the quotation here an eye for an eye as in blue, because that's a context, sorry, in green, because it's a context point and it's not taken from the passage. However, so whilst Jane holds the Old Testament idea of seeking revenge, Helen Burns holds a New Testament idea pioneered by Jesus of turn the other cheek. If somebody hits you on one side, forgive them and even turn the other cheek. So if you're slapped on one side, you can take another slap on the other side, which of course is a complete contrast to how Jane was at that time. Now, I've then explained some more, okay? So again, here in pink and as part of my explanation, where I've quoted again from the passage, as you can see here, I've quoted what Helen Burns says, love your enemies and I've contrasted this with what Jane says. If we're struck out with that reason, we should strike back again. Now here, I've mentioned structure point, repetition of strike and of course it's repetition of the verb, okay? So that's actually a language point too. Now, as you can see, I've then linked it back to the question and talked about how Jane in contrast to Helen Burns would have gone in terms of how she fights back, she violated the Victorian ideal of a woman of Victorian standards who was supposed to be very passive. Victorians called them the angels of the house, seen but not heard, very, very passive, very, very Christian, okay? And of course, Jane was completely against these Victorian values, however she does change and Helen's approach foreshadows, predicts how Jane is gonna be later on in the novel, okay? So just to recap again, as you can see in this paragraph, I've started with the point and of course in my point and even as you can see in my link, the last final part of my link, I've talked about how Helen Burns is admirable. So using keywords from the question. So started from my point in yellow. Evidence, as you can see, the first bit of evidence in blue, then I've explained that first bit of evidence in pink. Then I've contrasted a second bit of evidence taken from the extract. Again, this is Jane, what she says. Then I've explained it some more in pink, as you can see here and of course even added technique that Bronte uses. Then I've linked it back as you can see in green. So now let's move on to the next paragraph. Moreover, Helen is presented as extremely obedient and respectful towards her teachers despite how harsh and crawly Ms. Cathard treats her. At the beginning of the extract, Jane is angered and disgusted by Ms. Cathard's treatment of Helen. However, Helen admonishes her, not to judge by appearances and she defends her teacher, claiming Ms. Cathard, who's naturally neat and punctual in particular. Bronte uses asyndantic listing when Ms. Cathard is described as neat, punctual to show how Helen is able to see the positive side to everyone including teachers who mistreat her and this makes her appear extremely admirable to us as readers. Helen appears to go against the Victorian ideals of judging by appearances, which Jane is still affected by. In contrast to Jane, Helen appears to be extremely moral and she accepts the faults that are highlighted in her character. Jane is astounded that Helen is able to go beyond to surface appearances and consider the inner character of Ms. Cathard. Contextually, Helen's ideas of not judging based on appearances run contrary to many Victorian beliefs. Victorians often judged people, particularly based on their appearances, hence people who are poor and rugged in appearance were often judged to be immoral or deceitful, yet people who were wealthier and impressive looking were deemed to be morally upright. However, Helen goes against this, given Jane judges Ms. Cathard's outward appearance of anger. Helen shows that it's a mistake to judge people's virtue based on their appearances, their internal ideals could be vastly different. Hence Helen appears to be admirable as she exhibits a notion that relying on appearance alone is superficial and shallow. Now as you can see here, I've began once more with my point highlighted in yellow, again linking it back to the question. Then I've added evidence here, okay? Which is highlighted in blue. Then as part of my explanation, I've of course mentioned technique that Bronte uses. In this instance, it's listing a syndetine. A syndetic listing means when there's listing without any connectives or any conjunctions. So neat, punctual hair, in just this instance, of course, not in particular, that's a syndetine, okay? Then of course, here I've explained why Helen is admirable because she doesn't actually even judge people based on their appearance in contrast to Jane. Then of course, I've then explained the contextual factor relating to how Victorians judge people based on their external appearances, but Helen goes against this. This is why she is admirable, okay? So now let's look at how I conclude this essay. To conclude, Bronte depicts Helen burns as an admirable character through her strong Christian beliefs which become slowly integrated into Jane's character. When Jane first encounters Helen, she's fiery and hot tempered. However, once she notices Helen's virtues in spite of her struggles, Jane has influenced to become humble and calm character who learns to forgive. Helen is presented as morally superior, messianic character in low wood who we as readers admire as much as Jane and we see she has a positive and calming influence on Jane's character. To conclude, Helen is used to exhibit the Victorian ideal of a woman who is Christian, humble, virtuous and forgiving in spite of society's cruel treatment. So as I mentioned, it's always good to begin and end with, so you begin with an introduction but you end with an inclusion because what you're doing is you're kind of adding the icing on the cake. You're showing you examine that. Not only are you able to answer the question and of course develop your answers using the point evidence explanation method, but you're able to open the discussion broadly and close it. However, do bear in mind that your introduction and conclusion should not take you more than two and a half maximum three minutes. You're not spending time writing an introduction and planning an introduction and conclusion. It's just the icing on the cake. So of course, if you do find that you're running out of time, the most important, the meat of the essay are these elements highlighted. So these are the points and of course you are supporting with evidence from the text. That being said, you want to get yourself practised so much and you want to practise yourself under timed conditions so much that you can also add the icing on the cake, the proverbial introduction and conclusion which then really elevates your essay to top level nine marks. So that's it when it comes to understanding how to write a really winning essay and in this instance a winning essay to the character of Helen Burns. Thanks so much for listening.