 is the 21 convention Miami, Florida, and our panel. Panel one, we're having two, and this is our first one. We have Socrates, James McClain, we have Brian Bayesian, Robbie Cramer, and Anthony Johnson, I'm Steve, Liam McRae, James Marshall, the private man. We'll leave it at that. We'll leave it at that, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, and of course, Brent Smith. And so then we have a huge audience, just waiting for us to answer some questions. Question number one. James McClain, this is regarding your presentation yesterday. You spoke on women giving a test where they will basically cut you off for a good 10, 15 seconds or so, or like it's an undefined real amount of time. And to see if you can handle it socially being cut off like that and having to wait. But my question is, how long do you wait before you have to shift it in your head from I need to wait this test out and pass it to I need to do something to show that I'm not gonna just be disrespected or walked on and wait there forever. That's an excellent question, thank you. That's where I suppose your social intelligence comes in. Generally, most women aren't just gonna be outright mean to guys, sure there's a percent or two who will. It might be a tiny bit higher than that. So if you walk up to a girl and you know how to touch her skillfully, you go up with a good amount of energy. For most guys, that means wearing a good smile. And you sort of get her attention by touching her with lots of energy, touch it gently on the shoulder. And then you walk in and ask her a de-snopened question and you don't make it sexual, you don't make it sleazy, you don't say how beautiful she is or something sleazy. Then most girls, if you get the touch, the eye contact, the body language, the energy, correct, will at least give you a shot. And the reason a lot of the guys get rejected is because they're missing one of those key things which is what I certainly teach in my boot camps if you're my trainers, I'm sure most of these guys do too. So if you've got all that stuff right, then oftentimes, as I said yesterday, the girls, particularly if you appear quite confident or they potentially like you, will often hold you out for five or 10 seconds just to see what happens. Because they know in that five or 10 seconds, they've gotten rid of most of the guys who aren't particularly confident, who they might talk to for five minutes and get weird or awkward. And they're left with the more confident guys, the ones who'll be good in bed, the ones who've probably dated women as attractive as them before. So with the assumption that you're getting all the touch, eye contact, body language right, then yeah, I would just wait 10 seconds. It's almost like you're like a statue, just standing there waiting for them to treat you with some respect. If they've come into a bar or a party, then it's not my saying, but someone came up with implied acceptance of socialization. So if girls go to bars and they don't want anyone to talk to them, it's like, you know, why are you paying $15 a cocktail type thing? So, and I think you should have that attitude. A client of mine who did very well, it's like when I approach people, they're gonna be friendly. That was like his mantra. In terms of knowing when's too long, I'd say probably about 10 seconds for most guys. But I certainly wouldn't at the first sign of hesitation just turn around and go, why? Does that answer your question? Yeah, I'm just gonna clear up a little context. Okay, just to be more specific, if they try to push past that 10 second mark, would it be, would you move from there to be to leave and disengage that conversation or to try to reopen and, you know, like in some way express that you aren't here to be denied either? As I said in my speech, there's a video on my site called, Do This When You First Meet A Beautiful Woman at Social Coach. And that girl, I'd actually caught her eye contact for a very short period of time. And it was, it was, you know, it was like a, it wasn't a nanosecond, but it wasn't much more than that. But that gave me the idea that she'd at least shown some level of interest in me. And I literally just stood there like a statue for 30 seconds. This girl was from Eastern Europe, not many American, Australian, English girls would hold you out that long. But then when I actually finally talked to her, she was like giggly and feminine and was really into me because I was the only, you know, dude in an English-speaking country would just stand there in front of a whole bunch of people for 30 seconds waiting for a girl to talk to me. But she'd shown a tiny little bit of interest in me, what I read as interest before. So if it's totally a cold approach and you're doing all that touch, eye contact body language, energy stuff, right, then yeah, I'd probably wait for 10 seconds. And that'll seem like a long period of time for you, but you'll be amazed how often, hey, how you doing? I'm James. And they're sort of like, they do little girl-eye signals and then, okay, he's cool, eventually they come around. That sort of five-second delay is almost a test to see if you go away. Hey, so watching you guys on stage right now, 10 pretty accomplished dudes. The lights are on you guys in a lot of ways. It's easy to think that, you know, as a listener, you might be cut from a different cloth. So I have kind of a rapid-fire question. I want to show an answer from each of you. But what is one way in the past year that you've been criticized, proven false, or made some mistakes? And how did you grow from that? Which side do we want to start on? Yeah, you got it? Wow, when have I not been criticized? You have to have a tough skin to give advice and put videos out and so on. You just have to keep going. And I may make mistakes all the time. I'm certainly not perfect, but the key to it for me is that I don't worry about, to me it's never a loss, only a lesson. That's kind of what I live by when it comes to what I used to call mistakes. Now they're just lessons. So it allows me to move on much faster no matter what anyone says or what happens or what wrong decision I make. I just simply accept it, I did it, what did I learn from it, and I move on to the next thing. And the faster you can do that, the better off you're gonna be because that applies to everything, applies to rejection and so on. If you just like say, all right, next, next, next. What did I learn? Move forward, move forward, move forward, so. I am routinely criticized for refusing to believe that all girls are special snowflakes. And I'm always criticized by this, especially by the women that I've been dating in the past. I've lost female friends over this one. I stand by my guns. I know what the statistics are. I know what the survey said. I know what I know about human nature. So I always stand by it. I am willing to lose a potential friend or a current friend because I feel very strongly about this. And like I said, I've got the research to back it up and the experience to back it up as well. It's not easy, but it's kinda necessary. I often get criticized for having long hair and being called a wimpy faggot in YouTube trolling comments. And to that, I think, well, that seems strange because I'm not a faggot and I have sex with women a lot and I think my hair looks very pretty. So fuck you, short-haired, muscly dude with no chicks. I guess I wanna talk about something that I've talked about in the speech, which is like avoiding confrontation. And in the relationship that I've just been in recently, I've had moments where there's been criticism from her and that's been powerful to realize because it's like guys look at someone like me, even seeing me with my girl and being like, wow, cool, you're successful, you're making money, you're traveling the world, expressing yourself, you're creative. But yeah, then it's like in that last place for a lot of men, it's like the relationship that he has with his woman is just as important for him to be able to withstand criticism and deal with that confrontation. So yeah, even once you've got it all, once you've got the girl, once you've had sex with her, it's not like it's game over. It's a constant ongoing process of you guys communicating with each other. And as a man, you need to be able to receive criticism from a woman and process it in a healthy way, not lash out egotistically and call her a psycho or a lever or whatever, but also not be on the receiving end of being constantly criticized without drawing a clear boundary or telling her what you will and won't accept. So it's important to be able to receive criticism from a woman and know how to process that like a man. I got a wife, so I'm wrong all the time, you know? I wake up that way. But which is some truth, but as I always say, like anything that I value, I've lost and had to work back to get. If I go like I value honesty, but I've never had severe consequences from not being honest or whatever, then I don't know honesty. It's just some like bullshit ideal. And I think the one thing that I really thought when you said that, George, is last night, I didn't get to sleep, you know? There's a situation with Maria that she couldn't sleep as the first time being away from the baby and yes, weird like psychic breastfeeding connection, like crazy shit, man. And it pissed me off. It made me angry. I acted on it probably a lot less than I normally would have. But there were wrong things in that, but so what? You know, that's how you learn and do all that sort of shit. George, can you actually repeat the question real quick? Just to make sure I get the full. So it's like criticism and how you've grown from it this year? Yeah, what's one way that you've been criticized or found yourself wrong and had to rethink your thought process? I'm never wrong, so I'm not sure exactly where I'm gonna go with that. But I'll say this, I was married until February 21st of this year. And one of the things she criticized me on and Kevin was aware of this too, was that I don't handle pressure well. And that was always bizarre to me because I think I do very, very well. So post-divorce, I got to experience a lot of pressure this year enormously. Putting on two events after a really fucked up divorce like that really put me through the pressure cooker. Both like leading up to the events financially and logistically and all that setting events up, but also within the events. And I think I handled the pressure of these events, putting them on through thick and thin very, very well this year. Given the circumstances of what happened. So that was the criticism, I grew from it and I was able to test that out in real life. And it's been a badass fucking year because of putting the events on and going through all that. I've had to deal with a lot of self-criticism by not taking my own advice. I was in a relationship up until just a few weeks ago. That was definitely an unhealthy relationship and I knew it. And I constantly said, if I was coaching myself this was a client, what would I tell him to do? And I kept going against my own advice. And I knew that, but sometimes it's hard to take your own fucking advice, you know? And I failed test after test and it was a really brutal breakup and a brutal relationship, but I grew so much from it and being able to walk away from that relationship and not let it just continue on forever and ever and lose out on all that time. That was the hardest thing I've had to do but it was the right thing to do, so. Criticism to me is essential and I welcome it because it used to be something that I had a hard time taking in and now I want it as much as possible because that's how we grow. And I think the best criticism or the best advice I've gotten is from the women in my life. And the one that's standing out for me as a woman I was seeing and she came to me one day and said, she's standing there and she said, Brian, I gotta tell you something. Okay, and I could tell by the tone, this was gonna be something big for her and we'll see where this goes. And she looks at me and she goes, I think you just want me for sex. And I was like, okay. So I stopped and I had to think about this for a sec because my old reaction would be to argue, get logical, try to make this point. And the new me was working on just stopping and we'll take it in for a little bit, see how it lands, at least try it on, see how you get emotional, get reactive. So I did and I sat there for a minute and it didn't make any sense to me because we had done a lot of stuff that had nothing to do with sex that week. And then after sitting there for 30 seconds a minute and seeing how concerned she was, it hit me, it was like a light bulb went on because I wasn't fighting it inside. What had happened, I realized was being a guy that likes to work, I was working way too much. I was pushing myself. And when I was with her, I wasn't being present with her. And she was feeling me just kind of spending time with her but not connecting and it kind of just went off. And I used that moment and I just said, aha, this is what I feel it is. And so I grabbed her and I walked her literally into the bedroom, which would be the opposite of the thing the old me would do because I'm taking her to the bedroom, the thing she was complaining about, laid down on the bed and just started to hold her and we started to connect and boom, problem went away like that, never came up again. And I think that part of me that's learning to drop my guard and not fight has really changed my life dramatically. With women, you're always gonna be making mistakes constantly and the tests or criticism you get from a girl when she's 22 or a girl when she's 20 or a girl when she's 35 are just light years apart. In terms of criticism in general, sometimes it does affect my ego, but it's the best thing in life, dude. The people who hate you often give you the best feedback about you. One woman who I probably did quite a good job of pleasuring but I had very little understanding of much else to do with women. She was one of the greatest gifts of my life. She did the, has anyone seen Linda Blair in The Exorcist? She did one of those things at me, just the fit of all time. And, you know, but some of what came out of that fit, you know, some of it I didn't disagree with it was just her venting and being upset at me, but she gave me some absolute nuggets about women in amongst the criticism. And you can also get that in business and friendships and everything else in life. So welcome criticism, realized that maybe 70, 80, 90% of it might not be that valid, but every so often there's an absolute nugget amongst that criticism, which has helped me so much in life, yeah. I've got one project I'm gonna probably pull all three comments from. As an architect, I designed a number of projects and recently a fairly significant one. And in any case, I'm dealing with other people's money. I am dealing with other people's interests, needs and desires. And this particular case is a municipal client. So it was community-based and government-based, even though it was community. And we got a lot of criticism for our overall design because it was not standard. I think it was not a monument to beige and little cookie box windows and a hip roof. It very much stood out, it was dynamic. And that offended some people. The project in itself offended people when public resources and funding could have gone to other things, particularly school systems. And that's important and I value that. The first thing, and that's what Brian says is not to become defensive, but to sit down and hear the argument. And when prompted, I could explain that, yes, you're right, it could have gone to a school, but you're a retirement community. 80% of your population are retirees. How's the school system gonna benefit retirees as opposed to what we're doing? And you kind of get a better understanding. The other and a far scarier one, it's an architect's fear, is you have a building failure one way or another. And we had a significant rain recently, it was a 100-year rain, and the building flooded. And it was not complete. And that is not something you wanna find out during construction or literally at any point. But like Ed Drew said, and unfortunately it's not here, you get in front of the problem. You're the point of contact, you're the agent and responsible, assume that responsibility with no excuses. We have an issue, we're gonna get in front of it, we're gonna find out what that is, and we're gonna resolve this. And I left a message with the client because he wasn't in yet, he knew about it. And to sit down and say, we're on it, we're calling, we're asking, researching, and by the way, I'll be on my way. You have my attention, I will address this. That's significant. We've also had a number of issues where people like James had talked about where you will give opportunity for people to trust or people to fail you. We've had a number of manufacturers absolutely fail us on this project. We won't be using them again, but we give them an opportunity, we give them a chance to get it right because I don't expect perfect, I'm not perfect. There are gonna be errors. And so I look for those opportunities to grow, particularly in my own life where I make mistakes or there's particularly conflict. I see an opportunity to realize there's unseen values that either we need to address or to communicate. And so I kind of look for kind of conflicts or strikes within a relationship to actually look for opportunities to increase communication to get a better understanding. A lot of times it's just that. And so once you understand it, usually you can avoid that and that problem's resolved and you can move on to bigger issues. All right, so this is a question to again all of you guys. What's the best piece of advice you've ever given someone? 30 seconds. Sock. Oh, Jesus. Oh, Jesus. Oh, Jesus. Learn to say no. Take up emotional space. Learn to be able to say no. People too often say yes. We heard a whole presentation on nice guys. Nice guys don't have the ability to say no or take up emotional space. The ability to say no or not smile for 30 days. Sometimes is the difference between success and utter failure. I'm sort of lost. I just spit out a few things in 30 seconds. Learn to sell. Learn to start cold conversations with strangers. Learn to listen better. Learn to love reading books. That'll do me. Yeah, that seems like an impossible question. Especially when you'll have like one minute to figure out your answer. I agree with learn to say no, that's huge. Develop social freedom because it's like a prison when you don't. Go after your dreams. Figure out what your burning desire is and chase it. Don't live in a box your whole life on your death bed. You're gonna be filled with regrets and you're gonna be miserable. And so really, even if you don't know what it is, dig in there. Keep doing stuff till you figure it out. So that'll give your life a strong sense of purpose. Learn to be honest and really be honest with yourself where you're at. Be honest with other people. Tell people that you're holding something back or you're not communicating with them. Have a conversation with them. Get clear, get complete. And otherwise, if you're not, you'll just hang on to those lies and those relationships will fall apart. The original tagline of 21 University was and still is in that sense, never compromise. This is something I ended the under 21 convention with as a slide and it's something I stand by. I don't mean never come to an agreement with someone or work on an issue, but never compromise on what's important to you and what's valuable to you. Never sacrifice a higher value for a lower. It's never, ever, ever worth it to ever do. If you're looking to get help from somebody, pick one person to follow and don't listen to anybody else. Learn to be in your body. You know, we're a ghost living inside a skeleton which is covered in meat, which flies through the universe. And it's the thing that you're gonna be in until you die. So learning to meditate or take up some kind of physical practice that brings you out of the chattering thoughts of your mind into the actual body that you live in and that you fuck with and that you speak with is gonna transform your entire experience of existence. I was gonna say meditate. I taught you how to meditate. All right, tell everyone how to be silent. Confront your parents about the shit that you've got with them and then forgive them and travel a lot and live away from the place that you were born in at least once, if not forever in your life. For younger people in their 20s, do lots of interesting things. Don't be comfortable where you're at. Find things that are a little bit uncomfortable and just do them. Regrets are about the things not accomplished. The most important relationship you'll ever have is the one, excuse me, that you have with yourself. So work on that one. Strive to live outside your comfort zone because that's where all massive growth is and stop caring, let go and move on. Question for Liam. So, could you speak towards the difference between seeking approval with people and displaying genuine gratification or appreciation of someone in the early stages of a relationship and then is there a difference between newer and older relationships with that? If that makes sense. I don't understand the question. So, the difference between seeking approval from someone and displaying gratification towards someone. Right, so I think I get what you're saying. It's like, do you have to go to one extreme? So you learn the lesson, okay, you don't wanna seek approval from girls or if you're making new friends or if you started a new workplace, you don't wanna be the guy offering everyone coffee and offering mints, constantly smiling and saying happy Monday, or if you're with a girl you don't wanna be bringing flowers on the first date and massively over-investing. And I think what you're really asking is, therefore, do you have to do the other extreme? Do you have to bring her a dead flower and say, this is what you really are? Or do you have to pour hot coffee on your boss's face? No. It's about finding a middle ground and it's about what your intention is behind those actions as well. So, in my relationship, the one I talked about previously with my ex-girlfriend, I remember, I would do some things that were really from a place of trying to build intimacy and a genuine expression of love, like lighting candles in the bedroom before she came in from work. And that allowed us to create a shared experience together that was beautiful. Another thing that would do that's considered romantic but was definitely not coming from an authentic place of love was buying her flowers. Because what I was really doing was taking out an insurance contract against her fighting with me. I was trying to buy her silence. I was trying to say, and that's a plastic example of the nice guy behaviors, avoiding confrontation because I was planning against a future confrontation that I knew we inevitably have. And I was seeking approval, I guess, by trying to be the romantic guy with the flower. And I was giving to get because it wasn't, here's this flower, you are my flower, this is what you represent to me. It was like, here's this, please shut up for the next few days. I can't handle you yelling at me because I made some mistake again. So, it really comes back to what is your core motivation? Are you holding the door open for summer in your workplace because you're bringing them through, they're carrying a box, or are you holding it open and then watching their face and smiling and going, uh-huh, I'm a good guy, right? Do I get that promotion? Do you like me? Please like me. So, start with what is driving you to take that action before thinking about what the actual action is. The actual action doesn't matter so much. People can feel whether you're trying to manipulate them or not. I have a question for James, but other coaches can answer too. Long hair, short hair. Long hair. The Aussie jeans are still slightly bigger than those. Yeah. I was wondering how do you like cut someone off your life or reduce time spending with someone without like burning the bridges. Sometimes you have to burn bridges. The worst thing you can do is fade out on somebody. I think that's, it's cowardly and it also leaves all sorts of un, like loose ends psychically in your life, right? And that's why I love it if a girl says to me, look, I think you're an ugly piece of shit. I don't like you at all. I never wanna see you again. I'd much prefer that than the girl fades out or just sends me excuses back. And that's typically the way that I try to do things as well. I've had to fire people. I've had to break up with friendships and I've certainly had to do breakups in relationships. And the worst thing you can do is give somebody the hope that it's gonna continue if it's a relationship. So I need a break. We need to think about things. That's bullshit. And at the same time, yes, you need to be able to sit somebody down and have a discussion with them. And having a break up with somebody is a hard thing to do, but it's a much kinder thing to do on somebody than to, yeah, to leave things unresolved. Yeah, I guess this is a question for Liam. For all the nice guys out there, I guess when would you say it's a point where you've been this way with an interest for too long and now saying no, wouldn't take up emotional space. It would be defying an expectation at this point. No, actually, like that already happened. That's already gone. Well, how long would you be able to, like if you are a nice guy and you're having that problem with a woman, when would it have been too long and now it's not something you can come back from anymore because you would just be defying an expectation to change at that point? So we're really asking, is it possible to shift out of nice guy behaviors and transform a relationship with a woman? And the answer is yes. It's possible to redefine boundaries. It's possible to reassert yourself to shift the dynamic, but often, more often than not, it's gonna be hard and it's way easier to just start fresh with a new girl. I would recommend doing it if you notice that you're constantly avoiding confrontation with a girl, constantly seeking her approval, constantly giving her stuff to try and get something back in return and then having that bitter feeling of like, I did so much for you and you didn't give me anything back. When you never actually stated what it was that you want, it's a powerful experience to start asserting those boundaries. But in general, it's gonna be better to start with a new person because otherwise you're fighting an uphill battle against your own perception. And I think all of us have experienced that in some level where you meet someone from a previous stage in your life, maybe from high school and they take you back to that emotion. They put you back in that place. Even though you've evolved, you still can remember what it felt like to be that person with them. So having a clean slate to begin the new version of yourself is gonna make it much easier. And this kind of goes into the question that a lot of guys have like, should I still try and make it work with a girl? If you're asking that, the answer is no, go and approach new women and find someone to start fresh with. So we got like 15 minutes and we see you and I know George is gonna read off a question. Kevin, after that, him in the back. Yeah, now he's got it. All right, so in 30 seconds or less each, this is to all of you of course, how has your view of women changed? In other words, what was it before and what is it now? So before you started self-development. It's the last of these questions just because we're like seriously short on time. We've answered like four questions. Well, for sure, at the very beginning, they were my adversary. And now they are a teammate. That's how it should be. It's something that's supportive teammate and that's really the bottom line for me. Before they were glorious, angelic, perfect creatures incapable of anything wrong or incorrect. After learning some stuff, they're human beings. Before I needed to impress them and now I want us both to impress each other. Before I thought they don't really like sex or they trade that to get relationships or love or money. I want everyone to read this book called My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday and also another book called The Purity Myth and they both explore this Madonna Hall complex that we have on a societal level which tells us that girls are good and pure and don't really like sex or they're evil sluts who are trying to manipulate you and steal your money. Every woman is born biologically with a sexuality and there's nothing wrong with that. So I used to think there were pure angels who didn't like sex and I realized they're humans who have a sexuality. So there's like one thing that I think of that's very true today that always pisses people off and since everybody said something nice, I'll say this. You treat a lady like a lady and a bitch like a bitch and what that means is treat, how somebody acts in front of you, you treat them that way and it takes a certain level of confidence and perspective to do that. So that doesn't mean you just treat everybody like a bitch and expect to get results. If somebody disrespects you, they don't deserve to be respected in the ways that you would treat somebody that acts that way and if somebody respects you, then you treat them that way but if you do, if you mix those up, you fuck up your life. If you treat a bitch like a lady, you're fucked. If you treat a lady like a bitch, you're fucked, okay. Awesome. So this year, I don't think it was time specific but I'll make mine time specific. This year I learned firsthand after hearing about it for years at the convention from other speakers but not really grasping it intellectually or emotionally that a significant portion of the population, male and female, are genetically or otherwise psychologically damaged and the way that looks in real life is difficult to see if you haven't studied it or experienced it firsthand before. So that applies to women. Up to 15% from my understanding of the population are cluster B positive, meaning they're really fucked up and you wanna stay very, very far away from them and the only way you can do that is by talking to people who've been through it or you otherwise study it on purpose with purpose and intent. So do that because you're approaching these women all the time. Out of every 100 women you swipe on Tinder or approach at a bar or at a club, a good chunk of them are really fucked up and dangerous. So stay away from them, look for the ones who are not fucked up. Robbie, you're up. How do I go after that? Yeah, right. I used to use women to validate me and now I just wanna connect and have fun. I believe what you put out, you get back and my life reflects that. Growing up, I was around bipolar women so my experience of women early on was I drew bipolar women, crazy, yelling, screaming, all kinds of stuff. Now, because I've let all that go and done a lot of work to do that, I draw, I really look for the beauty in women and appreciate women and I get women that appreciate men and I think pretty much all the women I've been meeting in the last few years, I just think are amazing. So I believe what you put out is what you get back. I started off being incredibly intimidated by them and confused by them. These days, I sort of feel sorry for them a bit more because I think they have a really... So this is put up in the spotlight at a certain age and then not really cared about as much as they used to be. And if you look at a woman who's growing up today, three generations back, what was her great-great-grandmother's life like? It's like they've changed, I don't know. It's like thousands of years and just 30 or 40 so I think a lot of them are quite confused about it. So I do have a huge amount of empathy for them. But as Anthony said, there's some who haven't reacted very well to this and you've got to be a man and go out and find ones who are good. And if you can do that, then they will be a huge percentage of your happiness in life even before you have kids with them. And finally, as Liam said, women, I think love sex more than men by far as long as you know what you're doing. So yeah, women are very sexual creatures. You just need to know which buttons to push. For me, it was not necessarily understanding women but to realize that the biological dimorphisms between men and women, well, we're mostly unique and very, very similar. Where we differ, it becomes rather acute on certain areas, particularly where cultural influences then magnify that change. Understanding that, having an awareness of that, I think had a lot of the answers embedded within it and ultimately led to a greater sense of compassion and empathy for literally both sexes. Okay, guys. First of all, I wanna say thank you to everybody. It was, it still didn't finish, but it was excellent. And I say someone who visited POA Summit, Limitless Men, RSD Summit. One of the enlightenment that I got, and I already shared this, first of all, I feel so sad because you give gold and it's only 20 to 25 people here. One of the enlightenment that I got when I already shared this with organizers, you should do this at the Benningman Festival. You will get crowds of 500 of 1,000 people or 300 people. How much do they pay to store all this here? To speak to this, you know, there's 110,000 people on the other end of that camera. In fact, by the time these videos come out, they'll be 120. So there is a massive audience. It's just surrounding people up here, like cats is kinda difficult. At least once, you should try it. And get 500 people and now let's just, so I just wanna, let's just be a question. How do you get rid of limiting beliefs? I'm not good enough. I'm not handsome enough. I am overweight. I am poor. I don't have enough money. I'm not dress enough. I don't have enough friends. I'm not, eventually it's coming. I'm not good enough. I mean, the fact that you told it, you're good enough and you find it just not, it just, yeah, consciously understand but subconscious is resisting. For time constraints, let's go with Brent and then if there's times, James. Cool? Okay, so the simple answer is you rewrite all of that of what you just said as if you've already solved it. So I am good enough, I'm attractive, women find me attractive, I'm awesome, I make money, whatever it is, you just reverse it all, write it down and it really is consistency. So yeah, if you do it one or two days a week and you do it only once in a while when you think about it, you're not gonna change your, you're not gonna push through your resistance. So you have to do it every day, in the morning, at night, whenever you think about your life, whenever you encounter.