 So relax to the logistics and whatever, you know, you don't have to pay so strict attention to things because everything will be on the whiteboard in the kitchen. Mostly we just wanted to make sure that you had any questions and we need logistical type things right now. We could cover that and we'll spend 15 minutes just kind of going over some of the things I think we need to use this because I see you doing with your head. Can we put this on? There we go. We want everyone to be able to hear everything. Yeah, I was just saying that just to relax and listen to the logistics that we're going to be going over but also not to get too stressed about it because everything will be on the wall in the main kitchen. That's where you can go there and look to find all the information that we're going to be sharing tonight. So it's mainly just to be as clear as we can so that we can flow together in the silence and how we're going to communicate and some of the basic things that are good to know so that as we're living in community together in the silence that things can flow easily for us. So Tamara here has been putting together pages of logistics and we've got them down now. So we're going to turn it over to her and let her share with you some of the things that will be helpful for this week together. Good to turn my phone off, you're all here. So yeah, Suzanne said the most important thing to know is that everything I'm going over with you will be... It's like any direction I think you have to tell it like you're eating an ice cream kind of like. Yeah that's good. So including the stuff that they went over with you on your tours that will be up on the board so you can look at that stuff again and like what time did they say this was or stuff like that so and then everything I'm going over with you now will also be up there. So I'm just going to start where I start. So one of the main questions I've been asked is when is David going to be speaking? So we'll start there. So we're going to have the way it's going to work is everything on this on your retreat is optional. So you could actually spend the entire six days completely in silence in your room if you feel too. But the way that we're going to work it is that when you hear five bells that means that David's going to be speaking and we're going to have time slots for those so that if you wanted to take a walk or something you would have to worry like oh what if I missed the five bells so it'll either be from ten to twelve, two to four or seven to nine and that'll be up on the board and then we'll also ring five bells one day that's going to be speaking. And then for lunch which is at twelve thirty and dinner which is at five thirty it'll be three bells and so if it's not twelve thirty or five thirty and you hear three bells it means there's an impromptu gathering happening. So if you could just try to get here within like fifteen minutes and if you have to come in late that's fine too just do so quietly. It'll be at the same time as two, it'll be ten to twelve, four or seven to nine every session time. And those times will be written up on the board so that's when when gatherings do happen those will be the possible times that they will have. So you'll be able to kind of have an idea of when you can go for a walk or take a nap or a break. Okay so there's going to be morning meditation in here at eight forty five every morning feel free to come please try to be on time you can leave as you feel and then just please them quietly. Our lovely Dylan here has offered to do movement sessions in the mornings as well. So those are going to be at nine thirty that's nine thirty and that'll be on the board as well and where it will be so we'll let you know like the yard by the fire pit yard up here so it'll be very specific where things are going to be up. So Suzanne and Kirsten are going to be doing one-on-one prayer session one-on-one prayer sessions as it feels and as it comes in so we'll be putting sign-up sheets for those in the mornings and then they'll just put what hours are going to be available. So basically I'm sure you get an idea that like those boards are kind of your go-to boards and there to just see so you can check on them in the morning and that's where you'll get an idea of the happenings over the day and when you can do one-on-one prayer sessions and we'll be gathering these movement classes and things like this. So if you do want to attend something just try to be on time and if you just you know like some of the rooms I know are kind of far some people are done in the campground so if you're a few minutes late that's okay just please be quiet. The bunk rooms there's quite a few of you lovelies up there so there's going to be a lamp on in each room until 10 30 at night where we have a designated person who will turn the lamp off. If say you're up there and you still feel like you want to be up you're not necessarily ready to go to bed or what's not you can be in here or in the chapel there'll be a light on in here. Or the kitchen. Or the kitchen. If those rooms are all available to you we just prefer you didn't sleep in or the chapel. Coffee's going to be available in the morning at 6.30 and once the pot's out then no more coffee for the rest of the day but tea will be available all day long. And we have some of you have already seen and already put your names on glasses which is amazing. So those glasses are your glasses for this whole week that you're here and there's already tape on them and a pen by them so you can just put your name on them and you can either keep them there you can take them to your room. You can bring them in here although we ask that only water be brought in here and if you bring coffee or tea or something just bring it in something that has a lid on it like your water bottle or something. You just don't want any spills in here. So like I said mealtimes are 12.30 and 5.30 there'll be bells for that. Breakfast. Breakfast. Breakfast is from 7 to 8.30 and it's just going to be set out. So you can, actually would you explain the dish situation for me please? Like how, where do you want people to put their dishes and how that's going to go? This is our kitchen angel. Yeah. I haven't figured out the logistic totally yet but there'll be a place where you put your utensils in and we're going to have some kind of container where you'll just shovel out your, the food that's in your plate you know just so that the food goes in one container and there'll be another container where you'll put your utensils in and then you just put your plate. If there's a water place you know then you could just do the soak kind of dish. And then just put it down on a counter. If there's not then just put your plate down on a counter but I think it might figure out what you should be doing. Tensils, utensils and for the food. It'll be very easy for the food. You utensils. Shwee, shwee. Very nice. I guess the most important thing for you to know is you won't be doing your own dishes. We're really trying to avoid too much you know activity back where the cooks are and where all the prep's happening. So as much as we can keep people on this side of that counter that's the way it's going to go. Okay. There is a stand up water cooler in the kitchen. I don't know if everybody saw it but it's on the east side. Sunset's over there. It took me three months before I figured out where west and east was. Sun is at the west and it's over there. So when I say east I mean that wall. And the water here is very good. It's well water. You can drink it right out of the top. And there's a container outside too. And if you happen to be in one of the domes or what we call cocoons that also look like red loaves you probably have water in your room. So if you run out you can just come over and fill it up at the water cooler. We have, I'm sure all of you noticed when you were taking your tour that we have three bathrooms. So we have these lovely port-of-hotties. They're very clean. They're wonderful. And we're just really encouraging when you can please use those. It's easier on our septic system. So when you can use those that would be really gentle on the septic system. And then anybody using the outhouse. We also have two outhouses further to the east. And those have little buckets in them with some stuff you just shovel right in after you go potty. There is a bath in the bathhouse. You all pass the campground on your way here. So the people driving your shuttles might have pointed it out to you. There's actually a bath down there available to you with candles by it. And there are showers down there as well. I'll explain the shower sheet next. But there are showers down in the campground. The water down there is not for drinking. So if you just feel to go take a bath with some candles or whatnot you can find your way down there. You can see it from the swing. So that's where that is. You'll see it's got a ramp going up and steps going up to that. Okay. So now to the sign-up sheet for the showers. Right now it's on the cork board in the kitchen. And so the way that it's set up is that everybody will be signing up for one slot which will be for every other day. So one of the sheets says Saturday, Monday, and Wednesday. And then the other sheet says Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday. So you'll sign up for a specific time and then that will be your time every other day. And they're 15-minute slots but we're recommending five-minute showers just because it'll be easier on a whole system. Yeah, and if there's some reason that you really feel like you would like a shower every day, that can be arranged. But we're just asking everybody to just step back a little bit from all of that and just to relax. And every other day we felt was good with two showers and almost 40 people. We have a hot tub too. It's not many monasteries. It's a 21st century monastery. So basically you say, okay, I'm showering every other day but I'm going to soak and meditate in the hot tub. So we have hours for that too. Very generous hours. We love it when you shower before you go in the hot tub, especially with this many folks. And yeah, you should. The hot tub is for your use. We're not using the jets for this silent retreat. And if you do use it and need to go in the bath house after, please use the front door, not the back door, because that back door is just for the retreat and staying above the bath house. And the hours? Yeah, they were from 8am and 10.30 until the lights off. I mean, you should be back in your room if you're going to bat the lights off. You don't want showering after a certain hour. No, we don't want showering. But you can't take a shower. 8am to 10.30. And then if it's late, past what time? 9? I think it was 9 o'clock. When's the last shower? Oh, they're actually at 4.15. When's the last shower? I think we can go tell 8 for the hot tubbers if you wanted to rinse off after a hot tub. It's just like over 12. 12, 14 and a half hours a day. If you want to... It's all optional. You might like that. That's pretty good to me. A lot of healing has happened in that hot tub. A lot of healing. A lot of deep discussions, a lot of silence. A lot of meetings. Oh, yeah. Great stuff and lots of... We also have a lovely sign of sheet for volunteering for meal prep. So we're going to have meal prep teams. We already have a few main ones. So if you sign up for lunch and dinner and right next to where it says Saturday lunch, it'll say what time you have to be there. So really all it's going to tell is we're going to be doing it as much silence as possible. So all you're going to have to do is show up and Dion will tell you exactly what to do. You may be on cleanup and you may be on making a salad or whatnot. But feel free. The sign of sheet is in there and we need three people for both meals every day. So if you feel like you want to be of service it's a really great way to kind of help the mind. If you're just starting to feel a little restless or whatever it's a really great way to just kind of practice the mindfulness and while doing the task. So that's what we do all the time here and it's beautiful. So that's on the board in there as well and you can sign up right after we're done here. You can sign up in the morning. So just to keep in mind that during that there's just really the only talking would be if there's a really important question if you just didn't understand because she'll be very clear with her direction and we just want to keep it just really maintaining silence during those service opportunities. There's going to be a little section on the whiteboard in there as well that says notes for the steward which is me. So if something like you know, if you have a snake in your room Oh, thank you. Love suggestions. And just to ease your mind snakes are all hibernating now. It's all a reflection of mine. I've been out here all these years. I've never seen one. But everybody draws for it. They're transformation symbols. Shedding the skins. That might have been easier to say. For people that are in the further outpaces I think we're actually going to have a few moonless nights. So please remember to bring your flashlights when you come for anything in the evening or dinner because it starts to get dark. And we've got solar lights out there and stuff and we've done our best to make it easy. But yeah, just carry those flashlights. Please don't start any fires. There will be probably some scheduled fires and those will be on the board so look out for those. We might have some sunrise fires. This little fire pit out here will have a log in it every night and there's chairs and little bench so if you feel to just meditate with the fire there's chairs up here so you can pull one in if there's already people sitting there. There's a pile of blankets in the back there that are for the lawn so if you feel to lay out on the lawn there's some blankets and a few pillows just please return them when you're done. And every single person here should have a throw in their room. So we don't if tonight is any indication I don't know if it's ever going to get cold in here for this to matter but if you tend to get cold we don't have enough blankets in that little basket over there for everybody so you can just bring the blanket from your room and just remember to take it when you leave. And a chapel in the gathering room or for your use for meditating and prayer please feel free to use them. I've done so much healing in this room I've shed so many tears in this room. Please please please make sure to turn off your lights and fans whenever you leave your room lights lights lights off off off fans fans fans off off off alright this is the last thing a lot of people have been wondering how they can get books and CDs and so I put a basket over there and basically the price list is on there and tomorrow morning I believe all of our products will fit or the merchandise will be able to fit on the table there Nicholas we're going to join on that and so yeah if you brought cash or check you can just put it in the basket there we're just going to do it on the honor system so as you feel to you know look at the books and maybe get something then you can just do it like that so it's just so we can maintain the silence so you don't have to be like oh how do I stay in silence when I ask somebody if I can get this book okay she has worked so hard she has been done for I haven't done anything well it went so well alright so are there any questions anything I didn't cover that's a good question look at us we're like the prayer the one-on-one prayer meetings yeah I will go into my room which is the octagon um we'll come and get the people they didn't think of that one like when there's a time I could come and sit here yeah I have a great yeah that's a great idea we'll come and collect you the porch sit right here in one of these chairs and we will appear indoors or outdoors too right outside on the deck things on the weather how about the bench the swing bench sit on the step pine juice okay no just pine juice it's too sticky if it's warm enough it's good here's the official answer if it's cold come and sit in here if it's nice and warm sit outside on the end of the deck great you know we really don't plan anything anymore and it's very very spontaneous which we love and so this is a very organic retreat it will just be like we just have the basics so that we know that the mind can rest and you know the basics but we really are enjoying this not planning not having everything worked out so there will be moments when we have no idea what the answer is but we'll find it very quickly together so just on that note with the one-on-one pre-sessions as well just really be in prayer about it the purpose of them is that you need help that's what they're for and I don't want to talk too much because I'll go into our content the purpose of being here at the retreat is to allow yourself the spaciousness to go into your own mind and see what is there and listen from within and so something that might seem like a major disturbance you know in the first hour or two that you're here just give it a little time and be with it with the spirit and prayer and let some of those answers come to you and so yeah I wouldn't jump too quickly to putting your name on a sign up sheet just let it be let it percolate and then if there's something, if you're really stirred up and you're like whoa I need help you get to a point where you can't sink you can't drop then that's what those sessions are for perfect I have a question about the fans upstairs it's pretty warm in there even for sleeping can that fan without the light, the fan left on in the all night or you know on low there are a couple speeds I turn it down to a low speed you think on low it's nice to circulate yeah we should check that I don't know whether it is in the canyon room the heat's not on you probably will not need the heat with this many people that's like you said turn it off yeah to have the fan on low feels pretty good just because there's so many people in the rooms oh yeah it's in the mouth when you leave I think up in there you can just leave those but we have fans everywhere most of the private rooms we have fans in the bath house which makes a noise so it's good to turn those off but I think the bunk houses feels good to leave it on low and if anyone in those rooms actually gets cold in the closet in this room there's extra blankets there's a whole pile of extra blankets and that is for both rooms so if you're in this room and you're getting cold you can walk into this room and go into the closet and get a blanket what about the sulfur in the bath house down below so it's not a surprise okay the water down at the campground in the bath house there's a long sulfur smell so that's why it's not for drinking but it's fine for washing and for washing and the smell doesn't stay on you and the smell doesn't stay on you but it doesn't make you smell so it actually does clean so it actually does clean little things so if you go down there for a bath and you're like whoa is there something wrong but there's bubble bath so you can we're in the desert I'm happy that there's water when we were down at the campground I actually we hired a man to come and drill, drill, drill and try to find water down there so he drilled and drilled and drilled I don't know how many hundreds of dollars it was per foot and down and down and down and started off in the morning he was still drilling we hit water sounds like the pioneer days we hit water, no so then at lunchtime I had to say to everybody at the expression session everybody prayed that we hit water I said we'd never ask you to pray for specifics this is like hundreds of dollars per foot and he's drilling down through so I hear that there's sulfur water down there and I'm just happy that right after lunch he hit water I said okay everybody we all threw our arms in the air thank you Jesus send a land hoe we got water so we're very grateful more questions for these expression sessions they're not part of the science we'll go over that we actually just intuit it okay we have it in mind we have it in mind so what she's referring to is in our communities we do expression sessions we will probably do an altar session on Monday but it's very intuitive it's very spirit given so we just wait until the prompt comes and there could be an opportunity for us to come together and just lift up whatever's in the mind whatever's feeling like it's pressing on you and just give it to the prayer circle it's very very powerful it's very beautiful so that'll just be an intuition everything is optional so if you're feeling the need for something like that calm if you're not then you just continue to be in your flow everything that we do is just here to support the mind so that it can rest and relax and drop back deeper into that inner listening and inner knowing so all those things will just be given day to day questions? we'll just say some of you are in private rooms and some of you are in bunk rooms and shared it's just a beautiful opportunity to be very mindful and it's like when we talk about lights out at 1030 it's just to honor those that want to sleep and also just having the spaces to go to if you don't want to but just be aware that you're in a room with eight other people and also I was feeling like the toilet upstairs it's all women upstairs which is nice you guys don't really need to flush the toilet all night long you really don't and maybe the one that's up in the morning because you can hear it quite loudly so just little things like that you don't have to flush the toilet and so just to be aware that you're sharing the space and just a mindfulness one last thing I just remembered there's going to be snacks out on the tables during the day like fruit and trail mix and granola bars so once again we're just yeah it's not to go and just like open the fridge and say oh this looks good we'll have whatever we know we'll have snacks out there when they're gone they're gone okay ready to leave but yeah what are the designated areas during the night if people can't sleep in here, in the kitchen or the chapel or even out on the grounds there will be some kind of lights so people can just walk right in everybody should have we had everybody bring a flashlight and if you didn't remember to bring one we have some extras for those nights when you want to come out of your room there'll be a light in here all night there'll be a light on in the chapel and the fairy lights for walking around the grounds oh I wish you all the most beautiful retreat I'm sinking in I'm very excited I'm sinking with you and I honor the courage it took all of you to get here since beautiful I'm really really ugh you can relax you probably call this thank you for including love you all thank you okay if there aren't any other questions then we're going to start this evening session start this evening session with a beautiful beautiful song I think it's about eight minutes long we're going to talk a little more about the stations do you want to do it I think there was a question I don't think we have much information but I kind of heard I thought there was a bit of a question we have I do feel just to share so we have what is guaranteed every morning is the morning meditation that starts in here and then the movement session afterwards and then we have possible time slots where there could be a session we'll fill it in spontaneously there could be there could be a session it could be a movie session it could be a group meditation we have some beautiful guided meditations and music meditation it could be another music and movement meditation it could be a walk guided walk it could be a healing touch session there'll probably be an angel bath session towards the end of the week we've got a lot of beautiful ideas of things like that so we're just going to feel into the flow and the vibe day by day and get a sense of what is the call is it active, is it coming together with speaking is it very step back I mean the most of you may be maybe a guided meditation together we'll just be sharing so you could repeat those session slots just so people know that that's again time to be around they're perhaps instead of long walk down the canyon and we will ring the bell they're on the board yeah, 10-12 in the morning and lunch is guaranteed to 12-30 and then the afternoon 2-4 and it's most likely that we'll know by lunchtime if there's something in the afternoon so you don't need to hang around too long, like have lunch check out the board before you disappear and if there's nothing on there by 1.30 there's a good chance nothing's happening in the afternoon and then dinner is guaranteed and then if there's an evening session check the board at dinner time and you'll see if it's there it's a loud bell it's very loud so be aware of that too if someone walks to the bell and puts the earphones on and you're sitting really close then be warned cover your ears it's a loud bell, you can hear it in the campground I didn't ring it at its loudest because I knew most of you were already in here so I guess that's how far the field can wander that's a good question yeah, that's a really good question there's lots of like you can see the road, the natural roadways you can walk up behind for many many miles it just depends on how far you want to go the road is nice it's a nice walk through the canyon if you just want to walk the road yeah, so there's it's really, if you see a sign that says private property I wouldn't recommend going across that for the most part you're not going to see signs like that out here but if you keep on the roads and stuff and there's not traffic or anything so it's a nice pathway for you to walk and not try to go through the sagebrush up the hill, so yeah, there's plenty of places to roam yeah and our property our property is all up here and then if you want to explore across angels' landing like towards the domes there's only three dimes you can walk along the top of the cliff here and you'll see three in a row and then you can come back this way there's cocoons you'll see and then down you can take a walk down the driveway and down the little road to the campground and the whole campground is there and you'll see a teepee near the other building then you can take a walk there's overgrown paths on the stage where we used to have a music festival and there's another teepee down there and just some lovely trees and areas so if you wanted to just go we could our land doesn't actually go all the way to the river and so some cowboy type neighbors down in the canyon own that land so we don't recommend that we want to roam on it too much but if someone did have to slip down and sit by the river quietly you may be I mean it's a very rare occurrence that they would ask you to get off their land but it could happen but for the most part stay on air but if you're really drawn you might mention too that there's actually what's called a wash it's very very rare but it's unpredictable but when you go down the driveway or do we actually have a couple driveways is that could they walk through either one and you go down there that's Sam's Wash Road and they call it Sam's Wash Road because it's a wash and very very rarely but sometimes a torrent of water will come down I think Suzanne told me one time a woman parked her car there at one of her retreats first time years and years ago and that wash took that car out I mean I'm talking strong and it's very very rare but if something like that happens stay on high ground and don't try to swim in it or anything don't ride that way it's very strong and you can see down the campgrounds up on elevated ground so it's not subject to the wash the wash is just to the east of the campground so if you hear some kind of rumling don't go down down below the campground and so yeah that's good to know it's very rare snakes can flash blood you guys would be funny rather you know about the flash blood the snakes in your room we want you just to be mad again the context is it's all a reflection of mine people talk to me about snakes I've not seen one scorpion not seen one don't bring that I don't call forth his witnesses I get bunny rabbits yeah eagles flies beautiful birds circling yeah we have beautiful eagles like the Native American tradition if actually across the way that's actually Indian Native American land across the river when we sit on those benches and look out very beautiful and Native American tradition is rich with beautiful symbols of awakening so it's beautiful and we do have our bunnies the bunnies are very very friendly they won't let you touch them but they'll be out on the lawns throughout the day they're delightful any other questions what time is the morning meditation 8.45 breakfast will be done at 8.30 so you can show up between 7 and 8.30 or 7 and 8.15 probably for your breakfast and it'll all be out so there won't be any bell for that particular meal okay and yeah I was just talking on the porch too about how this feeling over these recent weeks of just how Jesus is laughing with us all really at everything and the lightness and joy and humor it's just so so strong in my mind and then it was interesting before coming over here I just reached over to a book I think it's right back there behind you it's called The Mystical Teachings of Jesus and so I just popped it open just to see if Jesus had anything to say to us I popped it right open to how will the world end so anyway it's in a silent retreat and basically it's where the silent retreat I popped open how will the world end and then I read the first few sentences the world will end in an illusion as it began in an illusion and then he said but it will be an illusion of mercy an illusion of love so it began with an illusion of hate and it will end with an illusion of love and a happy dream and joy and the world will end and laughter and so yeah that's something to keep in mind in this silent retreat you're just sinking inward to that light that bubbling lightness and I just keep experiencing more and more and more so strongly that how playful Jesus is so playful and he's literally as he says arranging time and space because he completed his part perfectly he's now in charge of the plan and he's playing with us with time and space that it's all very light even though the ego tries to judge it sometimes it's very harsh or difficult or extreme or sacrificial but those are just false concepts projected onto it it's very very light and very playful I keep getting these playful symbols always so that's good to remember and really on the silent retreat they really have some fun give yourself a lot of opportunity to have some fun in the silence yeah I feel like the opportunity that we all have together to sink in the prayer of our hearts that's what brings us all together is this desire for true connection with our source and it feels like holy ground really that we all come together and we just kept getting calls and calls and calls people wanting to come it's so beautiful that there's that kind of magnetism for the truth and that's how that's where we all meet is in that stillness and to be able to have such a gift of a place like this in the middle of nowhere people have come from all over it's like something like a clarion call went out and we all answered together and it feels really really holy to me like we have been you know taking your names down and it's like every day for a good solid month preparing and it's such an honor to do that because it's like welcoming a part of the mind back to its home back to itself and it's really what we live for it's the only thing that we live for into this authentic experience of awakening just to feel our hearts just open so as we look out the windows and we see each person arriving it's like a blessing to the mind the mind it's not personal but somehow you know when we come together we're two or more gathered there I am and to just completely accept the gift that's given for this time together and let go as best you can of any thoughts of anything other than what's happening in the moment for you let go as best you can of the concerns that you add in your life if there's prayer time just to open up so when there's prayer time which is all the time in the silence it's like the prayer is the medium of the miracle and we have a whole week devoted to the prayer of our hearts to contact that which loves us like you know I think it's a roomy poem this is something like as you step back and you quiet the mind that that which loves you can find you it's like let's all be found you know let's all be found and in the silence it can be very you know it can be very intense for some others drop quite easily but just to allow just to allow like person was saying just be with it don't try to fix anything just be with it just be with yourself you know just honor your prayer and step back and there's something so powerful to be able to come together with this shared purpose knowing that we've all come here for this divine purpose there's nothing better there's just nothing better and so yeah as we just start this journey together it's just a just a real invitation to the deepest part of your mind to let go and let God and let yourself be let yourself be completely let yourself be don't put any pressure on yourselves during this time a lot of people have never spent a day in silence so and this backdrop is just so supportive of that it's so supportive it's very spacious lots of places for quiet contemplation so I just feel really honored to just play my part and to welcome you so so much from the heart like we're the same you know we are the same and we've been in many many many retreats over the years probably all of us have and I've seen such powerful shifts in the mind in silent retreats and that's that prayer and allowing the shift in the mind and the heart to open up to an experience that is so beautiful and if you're not experiencing that beauty and you're stuck that's okay too that's why you're here and then you'll be supported you're not alone so it feels really good it takes a minute for the mind to settle down it's like just be patient just be patient it's just like a deep allowance of whatever thoughts are coming just let them come don't try to control anything let them pass by thank you thank you so much and just you know I remember I was just telling David earlier when we were in Cincinnati years and years ago I shared with him about this space and I said it's like a monastery David we'll just be like praying to each other and you know just the holiness and the sacred so like tonight we were saying it's here now it's here now this is what this place has been used for for many many years for many many purposes of healing and it takes different kind of a different vibe but now it feels like Gerson was saying this feels like what we're going to be doing more of sharing when it's given I don't think we're going to have that song I think we'll just we'll do it at the end don't worry I think we did it don't worry do you feel a share to talk just to welcome everyone I feel so honored that you would come into this stillness and I like that there's a spaciousness with this sign of retreat this isn't like necessarily like a posse of retreat or something where it's days of complete silence there could be like an ultra session if you go two or three days even have some things bubbling up where some things can be talked about we'll trust the spirit will orchestrate that and use it for all of us for healing because there's nothing that we would keep hidden from the light we want everything brought to the light, to the love we give it back to love to so that it may disappear and be dissolved so that it doesn't preoccupy us and a still mind is no small gift for many of us it's been a lifelong journey to spirit and we really honor that like a homecoming it's a homecoming for us I feel such grace I feel such depth and honor to becoming together like that in this space we don't really try to ritualize it sometimes I've been to silent retreats where they say don't make eye contact or you know it's to really give yourself opportunities to go in but the spirit if you want to look in someone's eyes or smile or whatever we're not ritualizing it's a state of being it's who we are we're not trying to manufacture or force anything or make anything happen everything's optional too so sometimes with retreats people will be like should I be somewhere else or should I be in this room or this or this you're welcome you're loved wherever you seem to be with that and there can't be an honoring and an attentiveness with sessions because we come together we want to be honoring of what we're all sharing but yeah some will be coming from the campground or farther to the east and so yeah like we shared earlier if you come and you think oh I might not get there on time then let that thought go too just relax and know that you're always in the right place at the right time and you're loved and welcomed so it feels beautiful to be able to share this time and just watch what sessions come spontaneously day by day watch the whiteboard and as we're going through it if even there's something that comes on your heart that you feel would be really helpful you can make a note to Tamara or you can let one of us know something comes in very strong from spirit that you feel is important we're all here for the same purpose we want to be very inclusive about that to that just love you all so dearly so great that we can share this together that's very precious thank you thank you for coming I think we'll have a bit of maybe passing the mic and sharing from your heart maybe what drew you here or if you want to share I just realized it's a silent retreat everyone can share their name but of course no one will be seeing each other's names so you really don't have to remember isn't that nice but yeah we'll pass the mic around and if you'd like to share your name and the state where you came from if you're in the US or the country if you come from further away and just share the prayer of what brought you here or yeah whether it was just this real inspiration to get you here or it's a real prayer for this retreat it's something that you're really hoping to receive some help or insight or release and obviously there's a lot of us so we don't if you can just come to the present story without too much keep it meaningful and brief we'll get it we'll get it, you don't need to explain it but as well know that we want to feel what is in your heart feel your heart you don't need to kind of zip it you can come from your heart I think the mic cable is not long enough so whoever wants to speak might can sit where Jeffrey is if you're a quiet speaker if you feel like you can speak up so who wants to come to the heart seat but I don't need the mic this is my first I don't think I've ever been to a silent retreat ever for any affiliation this or anything else and six days I feel really peaceful and happy to be here Calico was kind of the inspiration she was coming and it just felt good timing and I love Suzanne and I was really it just felt like it really fell in place and we had a lot of great conversations on the way up here oh my god they came from Santa Fe oh yes we're from New Mexico Calico's now she's a global citizen I live in currently in Santa Fe, Mexico I like that word currently someone said that today here oh yeah currently and topics that came up and are coming up here that I would like to have more clarity on is letting go of lack and loss particularly lack seems like it could be money but fill in the blank just whatever the mindset is that has seemingly have me see my life as things missing or lacking or not enough of something and it's kind of the whole giving and receiving energy of how much do I want to give it seems like an area of money but it really doesn't it's money as a symbol as like they all are so anyway I think that's enough said about that just yeah thank you Kathy that's my last two rise speaker for the next six days Yippee Yippee we have the door open again so we get some fresh air I'll just go around my name is Rita I'm from California and it's so beautiful to be here I'm already just feeling so peaceful I came here just to unwind out of my life take this precious time to just go within and you know go into the silence and quiet my mind and feel God's presence and feel that joy and peace I already feel it just to have this many people with the same purpose is just profound I've never experienced anything like this so I'm really looking forward to it and I just love you all thanks Rita I'm Calico and I'm just so grateful to be here I feel like I I mean I came for personal devotion from Santa Fe and when I left here I thought well glad that's over and I drove back by the time I got to Santa Fe it was like we're selling the house we're finding homes for the dogs we're getting rid of everything and we're moving to Mexico to the monastery my life has kind of turned upside down and inside out but the beautiful part is for the most part my entire community in Santa Fe and I've been in Santa Fe for 35 years I was a chiropractor and I got rid of the prac I mean I saw my last patient on Monday the table went yesterday it's just I threw out my diploma and my degree because it's not needed I'm really committed I know Laverne who's my contact in Mexico she said well maybe I could just set it up for a month and I said oh you're not getting rid of me I mean I really get that my whole life purpose is to join with love and God and join with other minds in that devotion and it's like nothing else really matters in my world right now and I mean to give well one dog I had to put down he was 18 but my other 14 year old I found a beautiful home for him with another course and miracle student down in El Paso it was so funny I dropped off Oakley and he has two dogs at night we stayed up all night long I was laying on his couch he was in his chair the lights were off and we just talked course and God and love and he said at one point he said you know the really silly thing about this is he had two dogs plus no mine and he was saying I think I may be on the same path as you not to worry we'll find homes for our dogs you know it's like that I really got for me and this is a lifelong thing my animals have always been a big veil between me and allowing myself to join with other human beings I mean they taught me how to love and I'm very grateful for that and it was time to allow them to go on and allow me to have the freedom to be up here so yeah I'm from San Fe but I'm really a part of this community whether or not they want me it doesn't matter I'm Karen from North Carolina and I was here last year for a retreat and just had an amazing love experience and have been studying the course ever since and all of a sudden I don't have words it's just it's just what my life is about it's everything to me and being with other mighty companions is just perfect I don't know that's all I have to say My name is Luanne and I'm from Alberta, Canada and I'm here to undo and be Michael Hi I'm Nicholas I'm a volunteer for this community I've been here two years My name is Nicholas I'm a volunteer for the community I've been here for two years and I'm just here to serve and just be used by the Holy Spirit because it's so worth it Thank you and we have you till Sunday night unless we really need to and we need to call you back We'll call right back It just feels it feels really beautiful being here with you along I was telling the people I was in the car I'm so excited to pick you up I just feel such a joy It's Saint Nicholas Thank you So thank you all Thank you Nicholas The very first time I saw David on a video I loved the prayer of my heart became obvious and it was that I wanted as well to lead a completely spirit directed life so when the spirit said move to Utah I listened and I've been here for six months and it's so much really just incredible and unwinding, healing expanding getting stretched in ways that are really uncomfortable sometimes and getting more and more surrendered on my knees and yeah it's just beautiful my companion's rock we're all here to share this space My name is Elena I was born in Colombia I moved to Australia and since I was a new girl I've always wanted to serve God I knew God without anybody teaching me that there was God He's always been in my heart and that's why I pray every single day God told me once that I would serve him just by doing whatever I did but with love and then I should just stay calm and just do whatever I do with love but nevertheless I still wanted to do more and so I kept asking and praying to please, please, please guide me to a way where I could finally live my life entirely to God to all of you and in September last year Spirit guided me to the Course in Miracles I started reading it I loved it and I thought that was it a beautiful book but then in February guided me to a video in which beautiful day it was being interviewed and that's all people can be teachers of the Course in Miracles I didn't know that I didn't know there were communities and then two weeks later God told me look if David is coming to Sydney I wasn't in Australia at the time and then, okay, and we then went look for him and yeah, the first link he was coming to Sydney in two weeks time and so I obviously felt okay, he wanted me to go and see him okay, I go and I got there three hours answering questions people were lovely but I kept asking Spirit what is so important that I am here I don't really know because I never follow any person nothing like that before but he was very strong and I kept asking why and no, I didn't know so at the very end David is finishing the talk and then I asked the Holy Spirit I said I still don't know what's the purpose of me being here and something grabbed me and pulled me by the feet of David and they would just smile and ask what, you know, how can I help you and I said I just have another question and then I told him that I didn't know if he would exist until three weeks ago and that I was there's always a purpose for everything and I asked Holy Spirit to tell me to David what was my purpose of being there and after a brief conversation with David he got the clarity and I asked me to join him and help him in Mexico and I said I would pause for a second because Spirit had been telling me to go to another country but he felt right so I immediately said yes and that's it I resigned my job and Spirit had all the plans for me so I didn't go to Mexico I'm here I arrived on Monday and I'm very pleased to happily and happy to have that and finally be of service to be joined with this beautiful family my sisters and brothers in the light for my love forever Thank you so much Thank you Jesus got you a green card too He just happened to drop a green card and I met you in February and he just after seventeen years was it? There were some miracles for many years Philip and I had a center we called it Miracle Resource Center in Los Gatos, California and we had many teachers many groups and met so many beautiful people through the course of miracles it's a wonderful vehicle for meeting my companions as you say and so I'm just grateful to be here and find out about this singer to be on this silent retreat it's a very beautiful spiritual place so thank you for providing this thing I'll go next I'm Tatsy and I'm Carly in Utah although it's all told up to about fifteen years when I've been in Utah I just keep researching back and I'm just so filled with love to be here being in this quiet and this sacred space surrounded by mighty companions and natural beauty for me is like a happy dream so thank you so glad it's here my name's Scott I'm here with my partner Lisa and I've always been a spiritually minded person that was just introduced to the course through Lisa last December personally with this and there's stuff I don't know what to think about it and there's stuff that I really feel the weight behind that the significance and so even with our differences we see our commonality and similarities and differences within the spiritual tradition so most recently a couple weeks ago we were just talking about silent retreats and these asked me would you ever be interested in going on one have you ever been on one it was just kind of the news over lunch and then we were reading something from the way of mastery that I looked up online about it and came across some of your videos David and I was really just taken in by your presentation and so I just started doing some googling and came across your book and there's this monastery and right after one of your book tours there was going to be a silent retreat and I looked and I was like it's next week it's often we're just like you know really trying because I can be really serious and one of the things I really appreciate is your light even without words it comes through and I feel like there's something there to tap into and so we just talked about it and we were like it's not overthink this let's just go but it felt long but as soon as you start thinking about it you can start getting your teacher out for this where did you come from? from Arizona thank you I'm Lisa from Phoenix also and it varies for the moment that I ended up here the deepest desire of my heart for many many years has been to awaken to the truth to my true identity I remember being a little girl and being maybe 7-8 years old and being so clear knowing that this world wasn't my home and very confused like what where's God what happened like having this knowing that this is not my home and being in an environment with a family that was very much about like this is who you are and I became very afraid and very alone and very sad and I got lost deeper into the dream until a lot of darkness and that awakened me back up to my spiritual path very aware of the ego mind within me and I know I'm asleep and I walk around knowing that I'm asleep wondering does anybody else know that they're asleep? and I want to and I've watched that I want to hold on to this identity that I made up I see my cherishing of it I see the words coming out of my mouth that I want to let it go and I see my awareness of it yet I I don't let it go and I just feel very blessed actually that my partner who's not been studying the course at all and I who've been studying the course for quite a while that he is the catalyst to bring this here hahahaha hahahaha hahahaha can I say what I think that is within myself is the lightness of spirit that I feel the ego mind in me is super serious super serious yeah hahahaha and I want to let it go I want to let the obstacles in my mind go I've been aware of them I've been holding them being with all of you together joining together I know gives me a place where there's so much potential beyond my limited self and I'm just grateful to be here with all of you thank you thank you thank you my name is Jamie and I am visiting from Panama and I had a trip plan my little sister and her husband are having just had their first baby and so I had a trip planned up to Washington DC to be there I didn't have a return ticket and my mom was also moving up to DC at the same time she's my mom is alone so the idea was for me to go up there and you know be Aunt Jamie and help mom move and everything and I kind of serendipitously found out that there was this retreat right at the end of the time when I would be going back anyway and I was like well this is obviously meant to be and it was a very strong pull yeah James you're going for this this is happening this is what's next for you on this path and meeting a sangha of people because in Panama there's a small group of us there are four of us that have a little group but to be able to meet this gathering of people and to be here and just feel like you're all even though I've never met you physically before it's like you're my dearest friends and going around and giving everyone hugs and I'm just like oh my gosh these people it's amazing so thank you I'm just honored to be here and super excited about what this is going to unfold for me and for all of us thank you James I'm Mita I'm from Northern California Sonoma County north of San Francisco and I've been to a couple of weekends that David has done in Marin and Sonoma there and I've been setting the course for started about ten years ago but seriously for the last couple of years but I came because I hit a lot of resistance when I tried to go to that place of stillness and that's what I want for this week is to go past that resistance to that place of stillness thank you yeah my name is Andy I think it was last Monday I had a really strong urge to travel somewhere no no later that day I went to a meditation and at the end of the meditation we always draw these cards and I told Spirit please give me some guidance on whatever card I picked the card out of the deck and it said it's time to go schedule I saw the silent retreat I asked Nick what do you think of it he said well it's full at the moment but we'll keep it in prayer and see what happens and I think a day later I had sent an email to the question for the show with David and Francis and David answered my question and right afterwards he said by the way I know everyone said the retreat is full we can definitely take like 20 more following me saying did you hear what David said did you hear that we were full right were you guys watching over here no I just heard I got called you know what David just said I said great and then the call started coming and it was really beautiful I think I talked to her she said something about of course the campground we always have the campground yeah of course we have the campground so then Jesus yeah I bought the plane ticket two or three days ago where are you from Maryland welcome Andy welcome and you and Nicholas know each other right yeah from high school bright lights you guys are so great what's your combined age 44 the go here comes the new generation my name is Ray and from Alberta Canada I was introduced to the course probably in the late 90s wasn't ready for it I reacquainted myself with it in January tried lots of things previous to that and never was able to shake the story fully kind of got a handle on it but I always thought that the ego was a savior up to about 20 and ever since I've been trying to lose it so I felt the rightness of this it really resonated well with me on the mind part of it being an analytical thinker also so I'm really grateful to be here to use all I can honestly say this is a very powerful and thank you so much for having me thank you Ray my name is Susan and I'm from Oregon but originally from British Columbia Canada and this is my first time here, my first time at a silent retreat I've been studying course and miracles for a number of years with the group which is where I met Liliana and I heard about the course from Liliana she had already signed up for it and I hadn't heard of it at all before over the over a period of several years I had from time to time looked for a silent retreat so when she mentioned this I was quite interested what's going on in my life right now what would I want to get at this I feel like I'm on the edge of a whole lot of really big decisions and I'm feeling pulled in a lot of different directions at one time so I would really like to get some clarity around that and to be able to go deep so much of what everybody else has said also this is true for me wanting to make that deep connection internally and here's some answers better than the answers the ones I come up with myself my name is Phillip I'm here with Nancy and my wife we were married once for over 12 years and then we split up for that long and recently got back together and we're married so we newly wed so about eight days of course it's longer than the 22 year old recently being raised as a very serious Catholic with two priest brothers lots of Jesuit education I learned how to look good in life better than I learned anything I think it's really gotten in my way of course I never have felt that I did the lessons properly I stand out somehow short changing the lessons wasn't getting it but what I realized when I saw this retreat was coming up I was in touch with Suzanne and recognized that being raised Catholic is what I was one is better at guilt and shame than anything else and one is always measuring themselves it's not going to contract many many years ago but it's still there and once I signed up for this retreat I developed a serious heart problem I had my heart shot twice so I stopped started on a bunch of medications when I never thought I had any kind of a problem and I can see it's all focusing my ego saying you ain't going to go nowhere but I am he started it's Diane and originally from Northern California Catholic Dominican just as bad I found the course at the golden break bookstore just walking through bumping around like a ping pong ball in the mid-star and there it was and I picked it up and I wasn't ready for it and then I came back to it actually with David to the canvas I had started it about a year before and then Tatsy was in Nevada and we were talking back and forth a couple of times a week and it's such an honor to be here with you and listen to the honesty I don't have to say anything you're saying we're one, we're joined and it's just about love and laughter and light and being honest and listening truly listening and I work with children in Park City, Utah Tatsy's actually there too and they tell me every day I have to come I have to come to learn to listen let go of all that wonderful teaching thank you it's an honor thank you Diane okay you're out too all that resistance great great contrast to know and to be okay with I don't know anything because it's going to be better okay but I trust and I'm so grateful I feel like I already know you and I just want to reach out to you when I need to but I try to listen to the Holy Spirit and give that try not to try I try not to get in the way of listening and I really want I really don't want to talk unless it's the Holy Spirit talking and I see that with you David and I see the way you do it and sometimes it comes through but I really am I was afraid to come you know when I come for a whole year but then I save my money and everything and then three days I get all like what are you doing I can't do this and I got scared because there are so many people coming but I like being like all of you because I can relate to everyone so I love being here so I'm from Philadelphia area my name is Marcia and I'm from Maine I'm scared to death to be here I've never been out on a trip I've never been on a trip I've studied the Course for a little years I came across David's teachings and he's drawn to his presence and I'd like some clarity in my life thank you so my name is David and I'm from Alberta Canada and I can actually access stillness for short periods of time but I can't sustain it so I wanted to join with the mighty companions because having one purpose I'm hoping will give me some sustain and I love nature so I'm here to spend a lot of time outside and decline thank you thank you I'm so grateful to be here your toes show it thank you see the mic awesome awesome I'm so grateful and really like you guys have been saying I mean I listened to all of you in my story there you are saying I said it they're all so much the same it's incredible I'm looking at me and it's like oh me looking at myself I love you I'm here with my dear friend how do I call that thank you thank you I decided to come I asked the Holy Spirit you have to show me a sign that I'm going to do talk on a little android like this and the little android decided not to do the touch you know how you touch it and you pick this movie, you pick that movie it would not do anything it wouldn't even turn off I was on Netflix and then this movie popped up and I said there was no way I couldn't turn it off couldn't change it and I said I want to watch a movie so I guess I'm going to watch this it was not thank you my name is James and I just felt so honored to welcome you all just to see all these beautiful smiley faces and feel all this devotion I don't know what else to say which is this is a spectacular screen yeah so thanks for coming sharing this big purpose of Holy Spirit where are you from James I'm from heaven can you confirm that that's good everyone will be curious about your accent now like it's Quadrogen Heaven North West North West North West I'm from Phoenix, Arizona as well I have been studying the course for about three years and just in the recent past I was feeling some huge insights and miracles and then slammed the door on that because I felt just an intense amount of resistance so this is me trying to kind of melt a little bit of that away and take it to the next level so I felt like coming here with the way to do it and I appreciate David's uncompromising approach which I'm very grateful for that and I appreciate everyone thank you thank you my name is Julie I'm quite shy about speaking and I had a red-eyed flight last night so I'm quite tired I don't know if I can speak clearly but I'll try I'm from the US but I live in Central Europe and I don't know anybody else I've been studying the course for I don't know three years maybe longer three years time goes on I don't know anybody where I live who studies the course so I've longed to be a group of people who speak the language and live it I do have a very solid spiritual community there but it's not they don't know the course or they know other only and I was in California for a month-long inquiry program and I longed to go deeper into silence and I was looking at all these different monasteries or temples or some place in the area and yeah I realized this was happening I looked into your schedule and the dates kind of overlap with two things but it almost fit and I thought no it can't work because I but anyway I'm really surprised to be here suddenly I found a compromise a way around it and a couple days ago I put the fight on thank you thank you thank you well I'm Liliana I came here from Portland Oregon a few days ago and I have quite a few ties to Ecuador where I lived many years and I just am so grateful for the YouTube talks that you gave David it just made the course of miracles meaningful and real for me I love to talk I love to listen I love to sing just everything many many words so I thought okay maybe you need to be quiet to see what happens I am here to worship and to share with all of you I'm so impressed it's the wrong word but I'm so touched by people communicating and really opening up and putting on the altar whatever it is an experience that is coming up so that we can be clean ourselves and be ready to know who it is we are so I like more of that it's just so grateful to be here for all of you thank you Liliana my name is Dylan and I just really love the sacredness and holiness that I feel in this community first time I came here was the second strawberry I think and I tend to be shy to speak but not when I move I speak very loudly and when I saw the announcement that there was going to be a salad retreat I loved to spend time in silence and prayer and I thought I really want to go but I don't know if I'm going to have life and finances all that stuff that's going to happen and I kept feeling this tickling in my stomach that I was supposed to go and I said I don't know how this is going to happen this time around and I think I contacted Suzanne and said I wanted to come and I was getting all excited to go and it was like a couple weeks before I was going to try to book a flight I had like this tooth extraction I had to get done and I didn't even know I had any pain because there was this dead tooth that was infected I didn't even have a clue what was going on but it would aid up the cost of what my playing fair would be so I just told Suzanne I still wanted to come but I didn't know how that was going to happen well in the meantime part of my practice with the courses I do tai chi every day and I do it out in our yard and I do it for myself or to come there could be 10, 12 people come free I don't charge anybody or it could just be me most of the time it's me but whoever comes are welcome to come and I've been doing my tai chi and I was literally praying for the community that they would feel the love that I feel for God when I'm in prayer or when I'm moving and I don't know what happened it was like the next day a client came in I do healing touch and stuff like that and I had accumulated enough money to get the plane ticket in a couple of days so I booked the ticket and I think Tamara called and asked if I was going to come and I booked the ticket and I said wow well there's part of it and then Suzanne and Tamara called and I'm not even sure we were trying to work out the payments to come and I'm not even sure how it came about if I knew somebody that did movement I said yeah so here I am yes I'll gift us in the morning with that tai chi it's beautiful so good to have you I could feel it definitely it's not personal I burst open every time I was doing a praying it was just so beautiful Karen and I'm from Washington and in the spirit of wanting to shift the energy I get real nervous being witnessed by a lot of people so I'm saying that to release that thank you yeah let it go so I am inside with so much excitement to be silent it's so deep for me I've been holding this whole retreat like it's a drink of water for my soul, for my being and it's a I'm holding that it's going to be a deepening so I can become more fluent at listening I'm Kristin and I'm from Colorado and I've never done a silent retreat I was in Estes Park in June and met David and a couple of other people and it was really great it was a really nice time and so I from that point I started listening to a lot more of David's talks online and I've been so grateful for that because I don't have a community I don't have there's no course community where I live so I just was reading on my own and I would listen to some other course teachers and then after this June retreat oh it was every day I was listening to David and I started going through the workbook lessons that he has online and it just made me feel like I was such a part of I didn't feel alone doing it anymore and then listening to all of you tonight now it's like I had so much fear I didn't think I had fear coming here until I was driving up the gravel road and then it came full bore and I get afraid of people like I don't want to let you in but listening to everybody it's like I hear you guys say what's on my mind so much that I feel the love and I really feel like I can let it in I'm really looking forward to going deeper and just letting some things just go that fear I just hold on to so much fear and I really want to let it go and just let God in and have that light and laughter and I feel that every now and then and it's like oh I know it's there and I don't want to be so serious I know that feeling I know really looking forward to the weekend and I'm so glad we did this it's so great it makes me feel so close to everybody like we're all one so thank you thank you hello everyone my name is Alexa we came here from California Los Angeles my two is at the Estes Park Petrie but even for that I just I'm a few years with the course but as soon as I opened it it was like all I had ever known was the immediate it was an immediate awareness of everything I've ever known since I've my first memories of being here at like two years and I had an interesting backstory which will not happen right now but I'll keep this to say my mom was a nun and my dad didn't really believe in God at all so it was very interesting but just from the moment actually my aunt who was a nun as well was the one that gave me the course and just full just submerged myself and every teaching I could find and everyone I really resonated with and David and the messengers were one we were just talking remembering like one of the first periscopes I think you guys did they were like sitting on the couch on the computer and felt part of this community just like so intensely connected and in Estes Park just kind of how I got here was I got this fortune cookie it said in three months from the state like amazing things are going to be happening or happiness or something is going to be unfolding and I was like oh that's nice and I was thinking of the date and I was like oh that's right before my birthday and then I met with Diana and Sarah and they were like oh and we're having a silent retreat right then too and so I think that you should ask for that for your birthday and come out and be part of it and unfolded and then with Kristen and it's kind of how I ended up here and then what I really I just from that moment it was the weekend of freedom retreat and I remember just talking to David and saying I feel an acceleration and I just surrender like I just totally felt the surrender and from that point which was a few months three months ago literally almost all of my everything I've ever known has fallen away has just been shedding and shedding just every single thing relationships and home and career and just every self-concept is melting and so I'm in the point of one of the last transitions of that well not the last obviously but one of the major ones and I'm here because there's no other place I'd rather be and I just know that this is what I'm supposed to be so I'm here for just the clarity and I just want to I want to be a clear channel and be used to and I'm so grateful Thank you Hello everyone My name is Janelle I'm originally from Puerto Rico I think you too I've been living in Florida for 10 years I'm a single mother of three two children and the way why I'm here is my own story but since I'm a little girl I've been feeling like a strong calling and I have been seeing manifestations like real my dad was a very abusive person and my mother like totally opposite but didn't relate to us we struggled a lot I never felt like lack of love and they never took me to church never they never told me what's God they never told me go read a Bible and I remember going outside and just looking to the skies and hearing inside me like something telling me I'm with you and I'm like and that's the long story but let me tell you how I came here February 17th I'm a church I was trying to build a business in fitness and health and I was writing a book and developing applications and I thought I was like I'm gonna make this very successful business and I can buy like a big house to my children because I'm a single mom and I'm just at church just praying and thinking God oh my God this is so done so perfect I know you're gonna bless me with this and I heard something in my heart and he said this is not the way I want you to be known by and I it's like I should stop everything stop and I'm like this and I start crying crying crying my daughter my oldest daughter she's by my side and she's like what's going on mom I cannot stop crying then that night I went home and I believe in the Holy Spirit he told me to write this he said a man is prisoner of his own divinity until he expresses his freedom to the wonders of God in his own life and he told me what to do and since then I stopped my business and I'm doing what he told me to do but the way I came here I was just growing through my emails and I normally erase like spans and I'm just like checking and I see this that says living miracle retreat whatever and I'm like what is that and I click to open and I start reading and I'm like and something told me you have to go and I'm like I don't even know who they are I'm still here and that's him they might probably get my money and then I contact Michael and then he called me immediately and I'm like this is his panda but he called me like that I'm like really? and I started talking with his ex because I'm working right now and he said figure it out okay great I hang up I went to my boss and I and I immediately rushed to her office to talk to you like this and she's like are you okay? I'm like I need to go away for a week for what? and I said I just hang up to a guy I don't know he told me about this retreat silent she said silent and I have to go and she said go for it I'm like oh my god really? she said yeah go and then okay I'm like yeah I'm going I have no money I have no money so immediately everything like after the over I went through my face just to get my mind like and I see this girl who just post something that said go for me I'm like that's it go for me go for me why nearly openly I can't go for me and in three days three friends pay for my flight and the deposit the kit is different it's difficult to hear and I know he has to tell me something and hopefully I can share with you thank you I'm glad to be here thank you my name is Katie and I'm from Toronto Canada and this this year I've been listening to I've been tuning into the Ellen virtual and I see these people and they're talking like I love it when you guys talk but then I think it's not possible to experience it so then I had this feeling that I should apply to come to the community and see to experience it myself and I deleted and I cried and I deleted and I cried the third time I remember one show David said you just do it just fly and we'll welcome you and I thought oh my god okay so then I fly and Michael and Kirsten called and I said yeah I want to come because I really want to hear directly God's voice I think it's for some special people like you guys not me I can't hear then I really want to be in silence and just allow myself like to be loved like I just want to be loved and you are connected thank you so my name is Laura and I'm currently residing in Culebra, Puerto Rico with my two sweet friends and I am really this is such a huge heart calling to be here and a moment I discovered and followed through and filled out the application which deleted no no on the third time it came through but we were wanted to walk we were thinking we were going to go to Spain to do the El Camino and then this all came through and I saw Utah I was like I can walk in Utah and then the whole monastery thing and then the whole going deeper and then going into the volunteer thing and then talking to Michael there was just the silence and it was like it was just this go home thing that just felt so big and yeah here we are here we all are experiencing home thank you thank you my name is Liz and I came from Vermont but live in Puerto Rico most of the time and I heard about you David from Dion and Lara and before that I started meditating in 1971 and that was for medical reasons migraine headaches some brilliant doctor said I think you should meditate I think that would help you and it was like opened up the world for me and in those meditations I understood myself a little better as a child I wanted to go to every single church I was like mom what's that that's a Piscopalian church can we go there and she go okay and so I think I was saved by almost every church Mormons included and but the meditation put me someplace different so I've been doing that and got into Zen meditation and probably close to 30 years I've done several silent retreats or chichines and struggled through some parts of it and just felt at home during other parts of it just like really grounded in and out of my body at the same time so it was an experience that I wanted to keep doing and then there were bits of life that pulled me off in different directions both of my grandmothers were into metaphysical stuff mom side and dad side and I inherited books old hard covered books and I'd read little bits of it and go oh that's so interesting when my grandmother died in 1986 I inherited a book that said of course the miracles and I started reading it and I said this is interesting you know it's sort of like Buddhism I sort of feel that and I sort of resonate with some of it and then I put it away and started studying with other teachers too along with doing my Buddhist meditation bit and lo and behold one of my friends that I was studying with or in a community with said please will you help me I need somebody to organize and get things together for this person that I've met and I really was going taking courses with him and reading his books and it was Gary Renard and I said sure why not and I sat through that first one and total resistance I said how can you listen to him his voice is so squeaky and he goes why are you listening with those ears I said yeah okay so then I did another one for him and so that got me into it but I didn't feel the community part of it I didn't get that part and every time I would go to Culebra Puerto Rico I just wanted the community to be spiritual and just loving because it needs it there you know I need it there and so listening to your voice um it wasn't squeaky it was just it just resonated and so I said he told me about the retreat and I said I think so and then I went to work in Vermont and I was two weekends ago I was helping another workshop friend of mine and I said you know I I'm gonna go to a silent retreat with David Hoffmeister and he said oh you're gonna have a great time I said it's a silent retreat and he goes hmm Liz and I said yeah I'm gonna come out of this finding out how to silently laugh so loud like the universe here ah so that's why I'm here I live in Denmark I have talked to God and to Jesus all my life but I've only been studying the course since January this year and it hit me quite hard a lot of healing and immediately I began to hear the words of Holy Spirit and in June this year I was strongly guided to go to a retreat in Holland and I have never in my life traveled on my own so I had a lot of resistance but I went and then I went to a retreat in Spain well it's my first time in the USA so yeah and I'm so grateful to be here all of you so much love and light yeah I'm looking forward to this week well I think we're out of time haha there's always time for you Jeffrey no such thing no such thing yeah I honestly don't know how I got in here I don't I got to the course through the stepping stone of recovery and there's a saying it says stay in the middle of the herd and I think this qualifies you know when we're going to pass the mic I'm like should I move back to my chair and I'm like no I like you here haha haha this is it haha haha last year I sat in the love's nest and I made a prayer and my prayer is the same now I laid down my dream as a holy son of God and rising up as he created me dispensed with idols and remember him and it's still my prayer today I do it with these guys on my shoulders it's like how can I be this lucky you know it's amazing and this is actually my first silent retreat too so that should be interesting but uh yeah thank you for all being with me haha well we have a breaking of silence at the end to do a circle yeah yeah I just want to share um I'm Kirsten and I haven't met everyone individually yet um I've been in a very very quiet place the last I don't know how long um and so it just feels really perfect to invite you all into it to join me um because it's so precious and it really is our natural state to have our mind be empty and quiet and to be in that hush a hush of heaven and I know it's something that you can't personally make happen and it's not something that you have personal control over and yet it can be desired and it can be nurtured and we can give this desire to be in touch with it our full attention and let it be our purpose and I'm so grateful that I was told when I first began meditating and I came to that through my green headaches haha I had to find that stillness beyond pain and I was told by my meditation a monk he said it's better for you than sleeping meditation that was a really beautiful gift to be told because I had a lot of concern around wanting to sleep which really was just wanting rest wanting to quiet, wanting time out away from this world and this mind and I was told that no matter how busy my mind was when I was meditating I was meditating I was meditating and it was better for me than sleep that took the pressure off I mean the spirit's guidance has been from there to allow life to become a meditation and it's just about letting go of whatever resistances in the mind moment by moment day by day so that mind can eventually just really feel like water like it can just flow with whatever you don't need anything from this world to flow and be in the peace you don't need anything to be different you don't need the environment to be a certain way so it's just the greatest gift to have this conscious process and practice pathway to be able to come into the true stillness a piece that can't be disturbed because that's alcohol I'm also very very grateful to be here with this gift of a retreat just laid out before us we feel such a a heartfelt invitation from the spirit for everybody to just be try to do this right just be truly truly rest your mind give yourself the gift of that deep rest don't try to figure anything out we have you we have you and it truly is our honor to give in this way to you and you're safe and you are at home so I just keep hearing just rest your minds your bodies let yourself be carried by others for change allow that love to find you to suit you to be with you that you're worthy of it that you are it just rest there is a depth here we felt it tonight with this group there's a depth of devotion so what we'd like to do is just play you a very beautiful song to take us into the silence this is where we will officially let the words go