 And here we are with the warriors that go out there to fight the wolves, right? It's not like they want to leave their comfort zone. They'd probably much rather sit in their tent and drink some beer. But there's something that matters to them and that is protecting the village. And so can they go out there even though they might have some self doubt, maybe even though they're in a critic speaks up, right? Of course, because it's so, so freaking important. What's up everybody and welcome to the show today. We drop great content each and every week and we wanna make sure that you guys get notified. And in order to do that, you're gonna have to smash that subscribe button and hit that notification bell. And if you've gotten a lot of value out of this, make sure you give us a like and share our videos with your friends. Now over the last few toolboxes, we discussed becoming a powerful communicator, which is step one in our unlock your X-Factor formula. Now what we mean by X-Factor, if you've been following the show, is how do you go from ordinary to extraordinary? What is that factor that makes you extraordinary and allows you to reach the success and potential you know you have? Now over the last year, we've asked all of our show guests what their X-Factor is and we've taken all of those responses from super successful guests and distilled down what we believe are those necessary steps that you have to take on your path to unlocking your X-Factor. Well today we wanna talk about step two, becoming unstoppable. Once you're a powerful communicator, well the only thing holding you back from taking that next step might be your own mind, fear, insecurity, self-doubt. So today Michael and Johnny are joining me to break down how we can become unstoppable and have the confidence to face down those fears and reach a state of freedom where we can take action in any area of our life that we truly desire. Now we have some myths to discuss around building confidence. You're not alone in having self-doubt and unfortunately our evolutionary biology and modern mainstream media are working against us and after we dispel some of these myths around what it takes to truly become confident, we're gonna break down how you can start taking action today to become unstoppable. But first let's jump into what is the biggest reason that many of us are struggling in the confidence department, letting our fears keep us on the sidelines? I'll actually put a number there. So I would say that 95% of the people out there struggle with confidence and they're trying really, really hard to develop it but they're using the wrong tool to fix the wrong problem. It's almost like whenever I work with someone that has been trying to work on their personal freedom on their confidence for years, it's like they have a shovel and they're digging a hole and all they can do is like speed up and shovel harder and the first thing I tell them is like stop, like put down the shovel. Let's try something completely different. Here's the big misconception about confidence that people have. People think rightly that confidence is a feeling and when they have confidence, it's easy to be free. It's easy to speak to everyone out there. It's easy to ask that person out. It's easy to go for that job offer when I have confidence. So here's the solution they very cleverly find for themselves. I have to find confidence first and then everything else becomes easy and then they spend years and years and years waiting for that magical moment where they have confidence and it never ever comes and the first, we can actually try this out if you tour up for it. The very first exercise I do with everyone who's going through become unstoppable is I ask this question, imagine I have a magic wand here and I can point this at you and magically you have 500% confidence. Like it's unlimited, it's unlimited confidence and what would you start doing and what would you stop doing? Like AJ, let's pick you, right? You're my go-to example guy today. What would you do differently today if you had unlimited confidence? I'd be speaking on more stages. So you would be as to what you would be doing differently and today I would assume you would apply to speak on more stages. Like after this interview here, after our chat, you'd be on the internet and you'd be looking for opportunities to go up on stage. Now here's the thing, there are three things. Whenever I do this example, this shows up without exception. There are three reasons why people can't do that right away, why they actually need that magic wand. The first reason is they have a lot of thoughts that get in the way. Self-doubt, the inner critic, the perfectionist. They have emotions that get in the way. It makes me feel stressed out. I'm afraid, I'm anxious. And they have a lack of skill. Now I tell them, look, the skills, I can't let that count because unless AJ, you get up on stage, unless you start pitching yourself, you won't get the skill anyway. So we're left with my thoughts get in the way and my emotions get in the way. So AJ, here's the thing. I don't have a magic wand. Like I'm actually holding up like a pen here. I don't have a magic wand. But if we manage to help you deal with those thoughts that get in the way and let's not fool ourself. Like thoughts really have the stopping power of a brick wall. Like it's tough to really deal with them. But if all that stands between you and that unlimited confidence AJ, are your thoughts and your emotions? Like come on, like, you know, let me show you some techniques to deal with them. And then after this call, we have you out there like sending pitches. Does that make sense? And that's what people don't get. Like they would say, Michael, first I need to be confident and then I can send out all those pitches and then I'll be on stage. And I'll be like, no, first you need to be on stage and then we can talk about you developing that skill and that confidence. And what I want to point out here that many of us again assume about others that we see as being confident or unstoppable, is that they don't have those doubts, they don't have those thoughts, they don't have those emotions. So many of us just feel if I can control my thoughts and focus on the positive and give myself affirmations and tell myself over and over that that doesn't matter, I can unlock confidence. And we see it time and time again that that doesn't work. When you are trying to control your thoughts, control your emotions, not only is it a ton of effort and energy, but it still doesn't work at the end of the day, which is why I love when we're interviewing all of our guests, when they express that self-doubt, when they share with you, they do it anyways. Yes, they feel it. Yes, they think it. Yes, imposter syndrome is there, but they take action anyways because they have goals more important than those thoughts and fears that are holding them back. I think this goes to a long way of showing the celebration and the hype and pep rallies for people who try to hype themselves up to do things that they are going to find difficult or walking into the unknown or uncertain about. For myself, we think about pep rallies in school, the big game, fire everybody up, but you can even go back in time into our warrior past and see the celebrations and the pep rallies, so to speak, before the warriors had to go out into the field the next day. Now, did they have confidence in themselves in their training? Well, they certainly did all the training they needed to do to go in there and be a formidable opponent, but they still needed to hype themselves up because they were walking into the unknown. Anything could have happened and there needs to be something to get you excited to walk in when everything inside of you is telling you you're not ready, you can't do that. What if this happens? What if that happens? Because we all have to deal with the inner voice that is trying to keep us safe. We drop great content each and every week and we wanna make sure that you guys get notified and in order to do that, you're gonna have to smash that subscribe button and hit that notification bell and if you've gotten a lot of value out of this, make sure you give us a like and share our videos with your friends. Johnny, you make such a great example here with the warrior, the small tribe that maybe gets attacked by wolves and the warriors pump themselves up and they go out there and they fight for their loved ones, for their village because here's the thing, when you look at confidence as a term, you find a lot of different definitions because it's not that clearly defined in the academic literature. The way that I use confidence in Become Unstoppable is you're outside of your comfort zone because inside your comfort zone, you don't need confidence. So you're outside of your comfort zone, you do what matters despite the difficult thoughts and feelings that come up and here we are with the warriors that go out there to fight the wolves, right? It's not like they want to leave their comfort zone, they'd probably much rather sit in their tent and drink some beer but there's something that matters to them and that is protecting the village and so can they go out there even though they might have some self-doubt, maybe even though they're inner critic speaks up, right? Of course, because it's so, so freaking important. Well, and certainly if they sat around waiting for themselves to get fired up to go take on this challenge, they could be waiting for a very long time and as we've said many, many times on this show that hope is not a strategy. So hoping that tomorrow I'm ready for this is a full Xeran, right? We're hoping that I'm going to be blessed to go out into the field and take on the wolves or whatever that challenge might be. And that, I can't wait, that's such a good point on it because I had one client at the end of the course for those many weeks of working together, he said to me, you know what, Michael? What I've learned first and foremost is that I can't wait anymore. I want to feel free now and I have to take action now. Whether I'm completely ready or not, I want to be free now. And the key distinction here is that emotions are fleeting, both positive and negative emotions. You know, I grew up playing high school football and I had those pep rallies and we would get fired up to take the field. And then the first time I got tackled, that emotion went out the window. So if you are planning on just riding this wave of positive emotion and positive thoughts off into the sunset to reach your goals, well, what happens when that emotion wanes? What happens when you get knocked down on the football field? That's the key here. That's what we mean by becoming unstoppable. Sure, everyone's highly motivated after a pep rally. Everyone can feel really good in that moment. But as we know, everything that you have sought after in your life thinking, this will make me happy. How long did that iPad make you happy? How long did that new house make you happy? How long did that career change make you truly happy? Are you still sitting here happy? No, that's not how life works. So difficult emotions, fear, is going to be a part of your journey. That is where the rubber meets the road. And when you have the right tools and the right mindset to tackle those difficult emotions, that's when you have the freedom that Michael's talking about, to change careers, to approach anyone, to travel the world, to go after what you want in your side hustle, to tell your family what you truly feel. That's what we mean by becoming unstoppable. It's not waiting for the right moment. It's not finding the motivation. It's not getting into state. All of those tricks and tactics and hacks that you've tried before, that's why you're here. And the science shows that, yeah, those will get you small results. Those will get you moving, but that's not gonna reach the big goals that we know you have, that untapped potential that you can't wait to unlock. So, as we were saying, this is about getting outside of your comfort zone. We don't need confidence in our comfort zone. We have tons of confidence in our comfort zone. That's what makes us comfortable. But it's what you do outside of your comfort zone that is what's important when we talk about becoming unstoppable. So, an example that I use with exactly that, like with your emotions, like relying on your emotions before you're able to do something, an example that I like to use there at the very beginning of the course is this idea that most of us, as we go through life, we're sitting in the passenger seat of a car and say that maybe we want to go from LA to Las Vegas. I don't know why these two cities popped into my mind right now, but let's say you're in the passenger seat of a car and you wanna go from Las Vegas to Los Angeles or the other way around and your thoughts and your emotions there at the driving wheel, there, there. So, your job as a passenger, how do you travel? Your job as a passenger is to make that driver think the right stuff and feel the right stuff. And if you can do that for a little bit, then for a couple of minutes, you're moving in the right direction. If you're not, then you're heading off the road. What we're doing in become unstoppable is I let them switch seats and I say, how about you're going into the driver's seat and you grab the wheel and you put your foot on the gas pedal. Now, here's what you need to expect. That passenger, your thoughts, your emotions, they're going to give you a lot of trouble. They're going to be the most nagging passenger you ever had in a car. You're driving too fast, you're driving too slow, you just, I don't know, you forgot your turn signal, what are you doing? Now, what most people will want to do is they say, okay, I'm willing to grab the steering wheel, but then I'm going to wait until that nagging passenger gets out of the car and then I turn the key, in which case I tell them, well, call me again in 10 years and see how that worked. But if you're willing to make that important drive because you actually want to go to Las Vegas or Los Angeles and it's important to you, are you willing to make that drive being fully in control if what you have to kind of live with at the very beginning is that this nagging voice is going to sit there. And that's what we're training in psychological terms, this is called expanding the behavioral repertoire. So this is how it works. And I think to many of our listeners, bear with me for 30 seconds and I think there's going to be a big click in your head. Let's say you are at a business meeting and the numbers are great, your boss just praised you, and in that business meeting, you have what's called a white behavioral repertoire. And you can tell a joke, you can ask a question, you can stretch, you can get a glass of water, you can write some notes, right? Because you're happy, you're relaxed. But if in that same situation, you are very tense, very anxious because the numbers aren't good and your boss has just criticized you a little bit. You have a very narrow behavioral repertoire. And maybe the only thing you can do is stare at your notes. If it's insanely narrow, maybe the only thing you can do is think, I need to chill out, I need to chill out, I need to chill out. And now people will come to me and they say, Michael, I have the solution. All I need to do is I need to relax because when I relax, I can do everything. So how do I relax? And my answer is like, that's not how it works. How about we do it the other way around? How about you do feel a little bit anxious, nervous, stressed, but you do go for that glass of water and you do ask that question. And maybe you do stretch a little bit. Maybe you even crack a joke, even though you don't feel like it. Now what happens, your behavioral repertoire opens up and your mind goes like, wait a second, I just told the joke. I can't be anxious. I can't be stressed, come on. I just got up to get a glass of water, right? But that's the way, that's first doing the action, first taking that driver's seat and then taking it from there. And it's putting belief in the fact that that negative emotion, that fear will also pass. Just like positive emotions can't stay there as much as we try and hope. Negative emotions, doubt, self-doubt, criticism, fear also will not stay there when you are taking action. So it's flipping it on its head. It's not get the emotion right, then take action. It's take action with a belief that the emotion is gonna come. And all of a sudden you start wiring your brain to seek action in these areas. Step a little bit further outside of your comfort zone. Step through that self-doubt. Step through that fear. And now what do you have the other side of this? You have experience. And those experience points translate into confidence points. And I've shared this on the show a few times. I'm trying to learn how to play golf. And of course, when you learn a new skill, what do you do? You're on YouTube, you're watching TikToks, you're getting all the tips. You're amassing all of this knowledge. But knowledge doesn't translate to confidence on the golf course when you actually have a club in your hand and a ball that you have to get on the green. So how do we actually develop confidence? It's not about overwhelming yourself with information. It's not about listening to that next podcast and hearing about someone else doing it. It's not watching that next video and visualizing yourself doing it. It's the experience and the ability to step beyond the fear that allows you to actually become unstoppable in any area of your life.