 Ladies and gentlemen, the start of the program, Our Miss Brooks, brought to you, usually at this time, sponsored by the Colgate Palm Olive Peat Company, is being delayed momentarily due to technical difficulties beyond our control. In the meantime, we offer you Organ Melodies by Dick O'Rant. To strike up the band, ladies and gentlemen, we have brought you Organ Melodies by Dick O'Rant. We've delayed the start of our Miss Brooks program, brought to you by the Colgate Palm Olive Peat Company. But now, technical difficulties being restored, we take you to Our Miss Brooks. The importance come up that I've got to discuss with Mr. Boyden. I'm meeting him at the zoo right now. Tell you all about it when I come back. Goodbye. Oh, Connie, you left a couple of letters on your dresser. She must be in a hurry. She didn't even open her mail, except this one. Dear Miss Brooks, as principal of Sunnydale Finishing School, oh, I shouldn't be reading Connie's mail. I'll get on with my vacuuming. First, I'll get this corner here. It's pretty dirty over by that dresser. As principal of Sunnydale Finishing School, I hereby acknowledge your application for a position. Oh, I'm terrible. I'd better get over to the other side of the room. Pretty dirty around Connie's letter, uh, dresser. Application for a position as an English teacher at our school. This is to inform you. Oh, I'd better shut this thing off. I can hardly hear what I'm reading. This is to inform you that we have an opening at Sunnydale, and we're looking forward to a personal interview. Very truly yours, Jonathan, if Margaret Davis, don't you dare read another word of this letter. No wonder Connie was so excited. Sunnydale is one of the most exclusive schools in the country, but that would mean her leaving Madison High. Oh, this is awful. I'd better phone our good concrete. As principal of Madison High School, he ought to know about this. Hello? Hello. Martha. This is Margaret Davis. Oh, hello, ma'am. It's a fine day after Thanksgiving. Well, frankly, Martha, I'm a little upset. I saw yourself into a coma yesterday. Oh, then maybe you'd better not tell him today. What? That our Miss Brooks may be leaving Madison High to take a position at Sunnydale Finishing School. Sunnydale Finishing School? How do you know, Margaret? Did Miss Brooks tell you? Not exactly, but I got it from the principal of Sunnydale himself, Jonathan F. Jonathan F. Who? Hold the wire a minute. F buyers. Is he there now? Yes. Right on Miss Brooks dresser. I mean, Martha, look, you've got to promise me you'll never breathe a word of this to Miss Brooks or anyone else. Oh, I promise, Margaret. Just by accident, I just happened to read a letter that was lying on Miss Brooks dresser. By accident, Margaret? Yes, I just happened to have my glasses on. But what are we going to do, Martha? We can't let Miss Brooks leave Madison. No, we certainly can't. Tell you what, Margaret, I'll talk this over with my daughter Harriet and call you back later. All right. And remember, you promised not to mention a word about my reading Miss Brooks' mail. Of course, my dear. Goodbye. Goodbye. Oh, I hope they'll be able to think of some way to keep her here. Oh, hello, my nerve. I'll get you some milk in a minute, dear. No, no, no. No, no, my nerve. Better stop licking your paw. You know what it does to you. You seem tight. Of course, Mr. Boyden. I thought you were a little tall for a pelican. It was nice of you to meet me. How'd you get over here so quickly? It was simple. I dressed on the way over. But now that I'm here, what was it you wanted to see me about? Well, perhaps we'd better sit down while I tell you. Here's a bench under this tree. Fine. Eh, you comfortable? Perfectly. Miss Brooks, I... Yes, Mr. Boyden? Well, you must forgive me if I seem overexcited. But frankly, I never thought this day would come. You didn't? No, I didn't. Well, before it goes, why didn't you think it would ever come? Because of... Because of the things that have happened in the past, or rather because of the things that haven't happened in the past. Those are the ones that bother me, too. You realize, of course, I'm referring to the migratory habits of the arctic grackle. Oh, I realized that a long time ago. I just didn't want to let on. This is the first time a grackle has ever been south of the Canadian border. Maybe he was waiting till after the election. I knew that something was afoot when I looked out of my window this morning and saw a black and blue bullfinch. What happened to him? Get caught in a badminton game? The movements of the grackle can be very accurately charted by closely observing the bullfinch, since they are in the truest sense of the word full cousins to the mottled thrush. Where did he come from? Hudson Bay. And almost all of these species would like to lay their eggs in a soft downy nest amid quiet surroundings. That's why I sent for you, Miss Brooks. Good. I'll take my hat off and keep my mouth shut. I know this sounds terribly involved, but actually it's quite simple. You see, my uncle's farm in Booneville is a perfect nesting ground for both bullfinch and thrush. How does your aunt feel about that? Well, they both love birds. I don't worry for them, and I have an idea that if I get right up there, I may stumble into some grackle eggs. Sounds like fun if you don't mind albumin on your oxfords. That's why I asked you to meet me, to say goodbye. Goodbye? But Mr. Boyden, haven't you heard the old saying, two grackle hunters are better than one? Oh, but you couldn't come along with me. It's a ten-hour drive to Booneville and we'd have to stay overnight. But we'd certainly be well chaperoned, what with your aunt and uncle and all those bullfinches. Yes, they did have 600 of them up there last year, but I don't know, Miss Brooks, even with the chaperones, you know how people talk and unless we didn't say anything about it, but even then they might find out, although we'd only be gone a couple of days, still if the rumor got around that we were... Of course we wouldn't be, but then there are those who might... Oh, but how could they? What do you think, Miss Brooks? Why should I, by then, decide among yourselves? Well, it is kind of a long trip to make alone. Maybe you're right, Miss Brooks, why with the two of us traveling together, time will fly. We can chat together, eat together, and pay for the gas together. I still insist that no one should hear about it, though, for the sake of both our reputation's absolute secrecy is essential. Not a word of this must cross our lips. Can I depend on you not to divulge our plans to a living soul? On your honor, Miss Brooks? Get out your pen knife and let it... let's exchange blood. Our Miss Brooks, starring Eve Arden, will continue in just a moment, but first, here is Vern Smith with an important announcement. Attention, ladies, regardless of age, skin type, or previous beauty care, doctors prove you too may win a lovelier complexion with palm olive soap. But to win this lovelier complexion, the kind men admire and women envy, you must stop improper cleansing. Instead, use palm olive soap alone the way doctors advise. Remember, 36 doctors, leading skin specialists, advised 1,285 women, many with complexion problems, to use palm olive this way. Some had dry skin, some oily, some coarse-looking. Using palm olive soap alone, 2 out of 3 won lovelier complexions, regardless of age, type of skin, or previous beauty care. Now, here's the plan doctors advise. Wash your face with palm olive soap. Massaging for 1 minute with palm olive's soft lather. This cleansing massage brings your skin palm olive's full beautifying effect. Rinse. Do this 3 times a day for 14 days. It's that simple, but leading skin specialists prove this way using palm olive alone, nothing else really works. So forget other beauty care. Use palm olive soap as these doctors advised for a lovelier complexion. Last night on the CBS Sing It Again program, you were promised an additional clue to the Fatem Voice and the $24,000 prize. Here it is. The Fatem is a famous ghost who galloped far from post to post. Yes, there is the clue for the $24,000 prize on the CBS Sing It Again program on Saturday night. The clue again, the Fatem is a famous ghost who galloped far from post to post. And now as she quietly prepares for a weekend in the country, our Miss Brooks is blissfully unaware of the furor caused by the 5-year-old letter which she left on her dresser. Let's look in now on Martha Conklin as she discusses the situation with her daughter Harriet. So you see Harriet, it looks very much like your favorite teacher will soon be leaving Madison Howe. Oh, that's terrible, Mother. Have you told Daddy about it yet? Not yet, Harriet. I'm waiting until he recovers from his Thanksgiving dinner. You know how upset he gets when we mention the shortage of teachers. Oh, yes. Golly, Mother, he's been lying over there on the couch for hours. Do you think he's all right? Of course he's all right. He's just sleeping. Aren't you, Osgood? I say, aren't you just sleeping, Osgood? No, no, no. Take it away. Take it. I guess I was having a nightmare. A nightmare, Daddy? Yes, I dreamt I was still eating. I swear I don't know how those pilgrims did it. Did what, Osgood? Ate all that turkey and fought Indians beside. I'm surprised at you, Daddy. That's not the real Thanksgiving spirit. A lot I've got to be thankful for. Well, you've got us, Daddy. Mother and me. Yes. I've got you all right. I've also got the school. A school full of overcrowded classrooms and a horde of unreasonable teachers constantly screaming for a living wage. Now, Osgood, don't work yourself up into a stew. Oh, please. Don't even mention words like that. You haven't got the right attitude, Daddy. Nowadays, if you can hang on to the good teachers, you've got anything else you get as gravy. Me! Me! Not you, too. Maybe we ought to go out and let your father sleep a while longer, Harry. Yes, that's a splendid suggestion, Mother. Oh, this couch feels good. Oh, I'll get it. Coming. Hi, Harriet. Hello, Mrs. Conklin. Hello, Walter. And how are you, Mr. Conklin? You certainly look peaceful. I was, then. Did you finish your lunch, Harriet? I just finished mine. We had plenty of turkey left over from yesterday, and I just ate the part that went over the... Oh, no! You can't take him out of here! What's the matter with your father, Harriet? Doesn't he feel good? Not too good, Walter. Let's go into the other room. Okay. I hope you feel better, Mr. Conklin. I guess it was a mistake to hash over Thanksgiving again. No! Come on out in the kitchen, Walter. There's something we want to tell you. Guess what, Walter? Miss Brooks is leaving Madison High. What? How do you know, Harriet? Mother found out from Mrs. Davis. Mrs. Davis? How does she know? We can't repeat that, Walter. Repeat what? That Mrs. Davis read a letter Miss Brooks left on her dresser. It was a letter offering her a position at Sunnydale finishing school. Sunnydale? But that's 500 miles from here. Oh, we've got to do something. Maybe we can cook up some kind of a scheme to make her stay. I know. We'll pretend I've become a delinquent. But do you think it'll work? It's got to work. Have you told Mr. Conklin about this? Not yet. We didn't want to upset him. Well, he'll find out sooner or later, and there's no sense in waiting until it's too late. Somebody ought to tell him right away. I agree. Don't you, Mother? Yes, Harriet, I do. Somebody ought to tell him. Walter? Don't look at me. If I go in there now, you'll bite my head off. Don't be silly, Walter. Mr. Conklin won't eat anything for two more days. I'm busy right now, Mrs. Davis. She would come around just when I'm packing. Well, come on in. Why, Connie, you're going away. No, Mrs. Davis. I'm not going away. Then why are you packing that bag? I'm going away, Mrs. Davis. I'm surprised that you, Constance, leaving town without even saying goodbye. And after we've been so close. Oh, please don't feel that way, Mrs. Davis. I just didn't want to discuss it right now. You see, I have a lot of things to do. Oh, I don't want anybody to see me like this. You answer the door, Connie. I'm going into the kitchen and make some tea. All right, Mrs. Davis. Hello, Miss Brooks. I've just got to talk to you for a minute. Come in, Harriet. Let's sit here in the living room. I can't stay very long, but I'll... Then it's true. You are leaving town. Leaving town? How did you know, Harriet? What's the difference? I know. And I realize it might be a pretty good opportunity for you. Pretty good. With half a break from the grackle, it's perfect. Oh, look, Harriet, I appreciate your interest, but I think I have to make my own decision in a matter like this. Oh, I know it seems attractive now, but later on you'll regret it. Well, I'll have to take my chances on that. Well, if you won't consider yourself, consider the ones who care for you. Think of Walter Denton. Is that a must? He's going to pieces. He doesn't do anything with him. You've got to straighten him out, Miss Brooks. What in the world are you talking about, Harriet? It's the career he's decided upon. Walter's been reading a big book lately about the Treasury Department and counterfeiters and... Well, that's nothing to be alarmed about. Every boy his age wants to be a T-man or a G-man or some kind of a letterman. But he doesn't want to be a T-man. He wants to be a counterfeiter. A counterfeiter? Oh, I'll get it. Hello, Walter. Come in. Hiya, Miss Brooks. I'm glad I nailed you before you took it on the lamb. I'm going to the living room. Oh, hello, Harriet. How's my little Confederate to be, huh? See how funny he acts. What is all this nonsense, Walter? What do you mean nonsense? I'm making money hand over fist. The only trouble is scratching the green goods. Ain't enough. It ain't? Nah! You've got to get a good queer shover to help you pass the bootle. Queer shover? A paper hanger. You know, snide pitcher. You can have the best cognac or in the world make your slush. But if you ain't got a top build poster to push the flash, you might as well slough the screwy and scramble for the McCoy. Yes, but if I could find my way back alone, I'd leave now. You've got to do something, Miss Brooks. Walter wasn't cut out for a life of crime. Oh, now listen, you two. I don't know what's behind all this, but this is... Oh, it's simple. When you get to where you're going, I'll send you a few stacks of hot to shove. I don't want to shove no hot. I mean... I wish somebody would tell me what's coming. It's a good thing I never built a better mousetrap. Good afternoon, Miss Brooks. Why, it's Mr. Mousetrap. I mean, Mr. Conklin. Conny. It's Mr. Conklin. Oh, hello, Osgood. I was just making some tea, but you know what they say? A watch pot never boils. Hello, Margaret. Now then, Miss Brooks, I'll be brief. I know that you're leaving town. You, too? Somebody must be reading my mail. On second thought, I'd better go back and watch that pot. Oh, you're Osgood. Miss Brooks, I think I can say without fear of contradiction that I know how to run a school as well as any principal in the country. Well, I guess you do, Mr. Conklin. That's why I'm here, to ask you to reconsider this proposition you've had. Proposition? Yes. I can offer you anything he can. How does Mrs. Conklin say if she knew you were talking this way? She's all for it. What? And so's my daughter Harriet. Oh, now, please, Mr. Conklin. I've had a rather puzzling day so far, but this is... What happens that your daughter's in the living room now? I think we'd better go in there. I'll be glad to. Hello, Harriet. Walter. Oh, Mr. Conklin. I'm awfully glad you decided to put your pride in your pocket and come over here. Did you ask her yet? Yes, Harriet, I did. The rest is up to Miss Brooks. Don't go away, anybody. I'll punch your transfers when I get back. Mr. Boynton. Yes, Miss Brooks. It's I. May I come in? Of course. I've still got a single in the mezzanine. Can I help wondering what happened to that oath of secrecy we took? That's what I'd like to know. I thought you weren't going to tell anybody about our trip to my uncle's place. I didn't say a word about it. You didn't? No. I've never seen so many wagging tongues in all my life. You think you've seen wagging tongues? My living room looks like a delicatessen. I just don't understand... Oh, hello, folks. Hi, Mr. Boynton. Oh, I'm glad you're here, Boynton. Maybe you can help get Miss Brooks to change her mind. Well, I don't wish to appear insubordinate, sir, but frankly, I thought the trip might do us both a lot of good. Both? Don't tell me you're leaving too? Pretty soon, there'll be no faculty left at Madison High whatsoever. We might as well all go. I don't think his uncle and aunt have room for you all. Besides, Mr. Conklin, I think where I go and what I do is nobody's business but my own. And I say it is our business. Why you should want to go traipsing off to Sunnydale finishing school is beyond me. Sunnydale finishing school? Of course. Now, there's no sense in beating about the bush. Mrs. Davis read the letter you left on your dresser this morning, and we know you've been offered a job there. Oh, that letter? Well, that's over five years old, Mr. Conklin. I turned that job down long ago. Oh, I'm sick and go straight. But then what were we talking about? You, Mr. Boynton, what was... How was... Why did Miss Brooks just where were you and Mr. Boynton going together? That, Mr. Conklin, is a secret between Mr. Boynton, myself, and 600 bullfinches. Martin, as our Miss Brooks, returns in just a moment, but first... Dream girl, dream girl, beautiful luster cream girl. Tonight, show him how much lovelier your hair can look after a luster cream shampoo. Only luster cream brings you K. Dumit's magic formula blend of secret ingredients plus gentle lanolin. Gives loveliness lather, even in hardest water. Glamourizes your hair as you wash it. Luster cream, not a soap, not a liquid, but a dainty cream shampoo. Leaves hair frequently clean, free of loose dandruff, glistening with sheen, soft, manageable. Gives new beauty to all hairdos or permanents. Four ounce jar, one dollar. Smaller sizes, either tubes or jars. Tonight, try luster cream shampoo and be a... Dream girl, dream girl, beautiful luster cream girl. You owe your crowning glory to all luster cream shampoo. And now, once again, here is our Miss Brooks. Well, after everyone found out about our plans, Mr. Boy naturally called off the expedition. But things weren't a total loss, because Saturday afternoon, he took me back to the zoo, and we sat by the aviary once again. You know, Miss Brooks, even though our trip didn't work out, I was very gratified to learn of your interest in birds and wildlife in general. Yes, I'm a great bird for wildlife. Since this common interest of ours has brought us so much closer together, there's something else I want to tell you, Miss Brooks. Something I think you ought to know. What's that, Mr. Boyman? There's a pelican here who holds 18 pounds of fish in his beak. What's he waiting for, the price to go up? Our Miss Brooks show brought to you by Tamaric Soap, your beauty hope and luster cream shampoo for soft, glamorous, green girl hair. Our Miss Brooks, starring Eve Arden, is produced by Larry Burns, written and directed by Al Lewis with music by Wilbur Hatch. Mr. Boynton is played by Jeff Chandler, Mr. Conklin by Gale Gordon. Dentists know what cleans teeth best, and over 4,000 dentists say Colgate Tooth Powder, with a two-minute routine, gets teeth sparkling and super clean. So to remove dull film and get your teeth shining clean, just brush teeth two minutes, morning and night, with Colgate Tooth Powder. Brush inside, outside, and biting surfaces. Always brush away from the gums. See how this gets teeth naturally bright. It removes dull film that improper brushing misses. And Colgate Tooth Powder also sweetens your breath. Try it. Buy Colgate Tooth Powder today. For mystery liberally sprinkled with laughs, listen to Mr. and Mrs. North. The exciting, fun-packed adventures of an amateur detective and his beautiful wife. Tune in Tuesday evenings over most of these same stations. And be with us again next week at the same time for another comedy episode of Our Miss Brooks. Stay tuned now for Laminabner, Bob Lamont speaking. This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting Service.